r/Trueoffmychest My Wife Cheated on Me with a Clown!

[@DarkEinherjar]

Cheating with a clown is not really humiliating... the true humiliation is the fact that, not only has she cheating on OP for a long time, she had the nerve to do it DURING HER KID'S BIRTHDAY PARTY!

[@yumekou6619]

Oh God, exactly what I was gonna say . It's just so ...pathetic

[@cynister7384]

We don't know if she's been cheating though, that's just a commenter's speculation.

[@DarkEinherjar]

@@cynister7384 The fact that she insisted on hiring the clown in the first place pretty much gives it away. That was my first thought when I read that part.

[@cake_9510]

At least the kid wouldn't end up living with two clowns Edit: unless said kid is forced to live with the two clowns, in which case that's a failure of the court system to give custody to the decent parent

[@raidernation7427]

@@cynister7384 it's true we don't know for a fact. However, it's highly unlikely she chose the 1st time to cheat during her kids b-day party. I'm willing to bet since she felt so comfortable doing it with so many ppl within earshot, it's not even close to a chance meeting.

[@erenthebombjaeger]

If anyone is curious the “I will ruin his life tomorrow” story was actually updated. Apparently OP wasn’t able to go through with the entire plan because he had seen her Reddit post when it blew up and didn’t come to the party and completely ignored her texts. OP still went through with cutting him off and exposing him as well as his friends but she never got to use her plan to it’s entirety.

[@whatbear3804]

Honestly i blame reddit a little to be fair

[@Wendy_O._Koopa]

I was actually thinking about how likely that was, because I can't imagine bragging on Reddit unless you were 120% *_sure_* your boyfriend did not use it. Personally, I would have held off, and made an r/NuclearRevenge post after the fact.

[@cherryl225]

she was too eager, wasted a good revenge plot lol.

[@LittleParody]

Yeah. As great as the revenge would've been, OP really should've waited until the deed was done so there wasn't as much of a chance of the plan getting out.

[@ArcanineEspeon]

NOOOOOOOOOOOO

[@spencera9229]

"my wife of 25 years" reaction, from a gay person! OP has a right to be mad about the lies. he knows WHY his wife lied, that she cant help that shes gay, etc. this doesnt look like homophobia at all. it looks like someone who's in severe pain; if his wife just wasnt in love with him, it'd be the exact same. OP has every right to hate his wife. it's not that shes gay, its that she lied for YEARS.

[@pixelpie05]

i've been in a similar situation, 9 years and no kids. It's one of the worst pains and I feel so betrayed for being lied to the whole time. I loved him so much and tried so hard for so long to get even an ounce of love back, but it wasn't enough.

[@StoutShako]

I disagree. I think it's totally possible she was so far in the closet, she didn't even know she was "really gay" because if you grow up in a homophobic environment, you can actually delude yourself into thinking your own feelings aren't real. I did that to myself for most of the years I've been alive. It doesn't sound like the wife was cheating on him with other women or doing anything nefarious behind his back. She just realized that the lie she was telling HERSELF wasn't true and had to come clean with him. That isn't to excuse her or say the husband doesn't have a right to feel upset about this. It's a tough situation for everyone involved, including the poor kids. But I'm unwilling to heap blame on her and say she cruelly strung him along for years for "no reason" like the exact sort of family that would try to disown a child for being gay wouldn't also be the same mfers pressuring her to get hitched and pop out some babies as soon as possible, too. It's very easy to judge her in a vacuum, but people and situations are complicated. I hope they can grow to be good friends and he can ultimately forgive her, if for no one else but their children.

[@TheSaxAppeal]

@@McLeanAmy it's a lie by omission though. Consider the context. Homophobic father. Brother is disowned for being gay. Clearly she knew she was gay and waiting for her father to die before living true to herself.

[@frostedbear6853]

​@@McLeanAmy 😂

[@DebtsofImmortality]

@@StoutShakoUnfortunately I have to disagree with this. I understand the idea that people just can’t come out sometimes, but she was using OP as a shield to block her homophobic father away. That is villainous, even if she didn’t mean it to be. Most people don’t mean to hurt people they love, but when they do, they have to accept that they did wrong by them. What she did simply wasn’t correct and can’t be excused by any means. Sorry, but the wife had options, one of them not being using OP as a pawn in her game of chess to run from her father.

[@spencera9229]

"i took my friends virginity" the fact that they took so much time before doing it (booking a hotel room, setting up a sweet night, etc) shows even further that OP didnt take advantage. they didnt rush into it

[@AdamPendergast]

It’s so beautiful, to have a friendship like that. BFFWB.

[@featherton3381]

The flower girl story: the fact that she happened to ask the dwarves in her life to be the flower girls would have to be a huge coincidence if she didn’t know that flower girls are normally children. I’m pretty sure she knew.

[@cherryl225]

100% agreed.

[@aerieleah533]

This exactly. I don't think r/ was thinking about it that way

[@supervegito2277]

Quite sus indeed. Though an easy way to check, is to just ask "Hey you do know thats a position ment for children right?" and then focus on what response you get. Proper people would be horrified and apologize... but if you dont get anything remotely resembling that...

[@BeanManolo]

I feel the biggest red flag is the sister saying she wanted the two because "it would be cute". It's like she feels dwarf people are a 'novelty' that would be nice to have on her wedding.

[@A_Rose_From_Concrete]

She definitely knew they were in their 30s. The only thing cute about short ring bearers and flower girls is that they are CHILDREN

[@Snak3mast3r]

Even if she didn’t realize that flower girls were children. It’s insulting. “Be my flower girl because it would just be so adorbs to have you do it” lady. People aren’t props in your wedding.

[@songohan3321]

The fact that she didn't ask anyone else first and went straight for the little people shows that she definitely knew.

[@yobabycolin2933]

@@songohan3321 Agreed.

[@Janjones7735]

Oh she definitely knew. That’s why she picked the shorter people and not ANY OF HER OTHER SIBLINGS. Ring bearers are also children. This woman is a POS. The thing is, flower men have become a thing in weddings for this reason (no kids in the family). She could have gone that route.

[@Wendy_O._Koopa]

Personally, I have no idea how you didn't know... have you just never been to a wedding before? The guy from your anecdote might not know, but I refuse to believe the entire male half of the classroom didn't know. It's easier to believe they were just okay with pedophilia, maybe they were Catholic? IDK, but as someone planning a wedding, that woman _definitely_ knew.

[@3horsesrunning199]

She knew exactly what she was doing. Somebody needs to set the Bride straight real fast & she needs to apologize to the both of them.

[@dracko158]

The wife in the first story isn't a clown, she's an entire circus.

[@deepseagargantuar1373]

*slow clap*

[@songohan3321]

No more like the carnival because the circus has higher standards.

[@hiroshi7025]

She had a bad case of clussy fever, ig...

[@Nerobyrne]

makes sense, there's at least one clown inside her regularly 😂

[@stgkgrimm7600]

Clown to clown communication

[@deniseslay9056]

The story about the friend with cancer: Dude! Please feel good. I’m literally weeping over how beautiful and wonderful this story is. She asked you. I could gush for pages. Please go forward knowing you are a good person and friend, and cherish the memories of your friend. Wow. She didn’t just ask you. She Chose You. I’m sorry for your loss. Sounds like you were really close.

[@Swnsasy]

The one who was going to go scorched earth on her boyfriend had me dying laughing because HE saw the post so her plans were ruined. I was sooo looking forward to hearing what happened and wished he didn't see it.. Lol

[@PawsOnTheBalcony]

She made the classic villain monologue before her plan had come to fruition? That's on her.

[@RAC00NFANGIRL]

@@PawsOnTheBalcony ooh well his life pretty much dead

[@danielbrant6740]

@Sergio Bicerra He just ran home to his mommy and said they had a fight. When she asked OP for details, they opened the proverbial floodgates and are now rightfully pissed at Cheater. Cheater's (ex) friends are also aware of his body waste fetishes and OP said she's not above sharing that info with the world since it's already public on Reddit. TL;DR version: OP got her revenge, it just wasn't as epic as she hoped.

[@TetraSky]

@Sergio Bicerra "Yesterday, I was supposed to ruin his life (repost)" google this and you should find the update. Posted by Clean-Stable-7973

[@12yroldedgelord41]

The story was fake, she just copped out

[@StitchTheFox]

Story #7: she asked you to. Just because she isn't here anymore doesn't change who she was in the moment.

[@Lrbearclaw]

I would argue that it does... but in a positive way. She wanted to share something with her friend that he would carry forever. That she would be with him the rest of his life because of the night they shared. Honestly, I cannot think of a more perfect memory of your best friend after they are gone.

[@Hawk1966]

I'm actually kinda stunned at the missing knowledge about flower girls. I've seen them in movies and real weddings back to when I was a kid, I'm in my middle 50s now. Even if they didn't know the moment she said it would be cute (a fair giveaway she did know the roles were normally done by kids) it became insulting.

[@amandaarcher7919]

She knows but thinks people should accommodate her just because she's the BRIDE

[@dnisey64]

Exactly

[@GP27373]

Exactly! Not to mention it's in the title. Flower GIRL. Not flower woman, flower lady, or flower maid. 🤦🏻‍♀️

[@FlashQuatsch]

@@GP27373 tbf lots of people refer to women as girls up til their late 20s or so 🤔

[@jessicawhitmore5350]

Just about every single person on the planet knows this, yes.

[@Shenn3165]

rSlash, I wouldn't give the bride any slack. If she didn't know that children where suppose to be the flowergirl/ ring bearer, then why would she want small people to take the role?

[@ashleytheblindvisionary907]

That's what I was thinking

[@OmegaGuess]

Yeah like if it was flower girl OR ring bearer? Maybe...MAYBE I'd give it a bit of a "coincidence" pass but still with a heavy side eye. The fact that she had BOTH roles filled by little people? She knew. No way in hell she didn't.

[@neilprice513]

It's one thing for OP's wife to use him as her "beard" when OP knows about it, I knew a Muslim couple who are a gay man and lesbian woman who are both each other's beard for their respective VERY orthodox families (They also have 2 adopted children together and claimed they have fertility issues), or if OP's wife was confused about her s£xuality and/or in the closet it would be understandable. The disgusting thing is she kept it a secret from everyone, knowing she was always a lesbian. Keeping if from OP for 25 years? That's cruel.

[@DrkWhiteWolf]

I VOLUNTEER AS TRIBUTE!

[@RiveroftheWither]

As an asexual aromantic myself, I would be totally down for a marriage of convenience. There are benefits for taxes, insurances, etc. That said I would NEVER do what that woman did in the story. I would be upfront and most likely with another aro ace

[@TheAidanodian]

This may be a lil random but I wanna see a sitcom based around a Muslim couple like that

[@aether1356]

But look at it from her perspective, any woman knows how much pressure is on when they're young to settle down, find a man and start popping out babies, she was doing what she thought she had to do and was probably lying to herself about it, she probably didn't even realise that she was gay when she married this guy, denial is a powerful thing especially when you grew up in such a homophobic environment. I know from her side she wouldve wanted it to work so badly, wanted to love him, wanted to be "normal" but it got to a point that she couldn't take it anymore. They're both victims of her father's homophobia. My stepdads parents were actually in a similar situation, his mum came out as a lesbian in her 40s or 50s and they split, but they stayed friends and even after she died of cancer years later his dad only had good things to say about her.

[@topiasnousiainen5258]

@@aether1356 being a victim doesn't justify shitty actions or make them acceptable. They're both victims of homophobia, but the difference is that she made other people her victims.

[@BR.1991]

The guy that took his friends virginity is a wonderful human, especially for making it special 💜

[@woofy1988]

Story 1: I'm a horrible person because I couldn't help but imagine OP following the sound of rhythmic honking to find his wife with the clown....

[@RAC00NFANGIRL]

Haha I’m sorry I laughed even those this fucked up.

[@novamarpo3]

XD

[@ashv9565]

I'm a member of the LGBTQ community and boy do I understand that coming out of the closet can be dangerous and simply not an option for people. HOWEVER, that is not an excuse to do this to someone. Now if you find someone willing to marry you to help you stay safe - sure whatever. But lying to them and stringing them along is wrong on so many levels and I don't blame anyone for being angry.

[@theshadow420blazeit7]

You know what scares me about shit like that story you are talking about? Kids were involved... something tells me that the dads unifying front will eventually fade and the kids will pick up on it. Yeah, the kids are gonna get messed up from it...

[@unmasc]

it could’ve possibly been that she hadn’t know for sure if she was a lesbian until they were married or something but even THEN she should’ve just broken it off citing the very true reason that she simply was not in love with him. she chose to lie regardless which is so upsetting.

[@theshadow420blazeit7]

@@unmasc bet you one of the kids becomes homophobic out of misplaced anger.. I can see that happening

[@jinkies8655]

it seems like no one here is understanding (dabney included) that she was lying to herself too !!! it wasnt a malicious plan or anything, she likely spent all of these years telling herself that 'this is good, this is right, i am happy, we are happy' until it just didnt work anymore and was too painful. it's more than just "coming out" being dangerous or uncomfortable, it sounds like she was incredibly traumatized by what her dad expressed abt lgbt people when she was young, and then likely suppressed anything she was feeling that wasnt straight and ended up brainwashing herself for a long time

[@kwehztalcoatl]

@@jinkies8655 but does she deserve a pass for roping a man and several children into this mess? At what point does sympathy run out and liability begin? Should the husband and children just be sidelined by their own spouse/mother because she found herself? There are deep-seated complications about this matter and it could have been handled so many ways rather than pure blunt honesty.

[@jman12g73]

I can 100% sympathize with the wife growing up in a house not knowing you’re gay, but if she’s actively saying that he can’t be mad he’s definitely entitled to feel betrayed.

[@faeriefire78]

Story with terminally ill friend: I hope he was able to let go of his guilt. It seemed to me that it was a beautiful night between two people who love each other, and it fulfilled a wish/need for his friend in a loving way. I hope he'll look at it as something special they shared together, not anything to be ashamed of.

[@DarcOne13]

The guy with the gay wife: you get to be mad. You get to hate her. Just not in front of the kids. You can tell them why you feel betrayed, but you cannot tell them you hate her. I'm sure your oldest will gather that you do, but you do not want to deal with the fallout of "poisoning" them against her. "Mom had struggles, and I got taken along for the ride. I'm mad, but I don't regret you kids." That's all they need to hear about it.

[@Nerobyrne]

Yeah, it does seem like that's what he's trying to do. Sounds like he's real mature about it, he's dealing with his feelings but not letting them destroy the people around him.

[@mannyheffley4688]

No the kids deserve to know their mom is a evil witch

[@DarcOne13]

@@Nerobyrne Yeah, there is no easy answer, sadly. Everyone got screwed in different ways here.

[@wrenholder8436]

Yeah honestly I feel bad for all of them if the mom was able to be her self non of them would be in this situation but I get the idea of not wanting to be cast out by your family. The dad was in love and ultimately betrayed because it wasn't the love that he wanted and the kids are stuck im between.

[@geoffreydevereaux3272]

Well put.

[@quietc0smos]

The story where OP was supposed to ruin a dudes life got an update: So the post made top of Reddit and kinda backfired. The persons Boyfriend saw the post and is not answering OPs calls or text.

[@silverflight01]

Story 3: Imagine having someone that gives you all their love and happiness, and you repay it by cheating with *two* women. Like, that is a level of evil that you can NEVER be forgiven for.

[@DrkWhiteWolf]

The last story was so wholesome compared to all the other trainwrecks.

[@calebvaldecanas8867]

The one before that was really sweet too imo

[@coltenjohnston6399]

I listen to Rslash every single day and even re-listen to the stories it makes my day! Keep up the good work Rslash!

[@CrankyNovelist7335]

While understanding being scared of being disowned by her father, that doesn’t mean she needed to lie to everyone. Her friends could have known. Her brother could have known. She could have gotten a beard. (A beard is someone you start a fake relationship with to avoid telling someone you’re gay. The beard is usually also a gay person who’s concerned about coming out to certain people for one reason or another.)

[@RealCoolstriker64]

Not even that. She could have just *not dated op.* All she really had to do was *nothing!* doing the right thing here was easier! But nooOOoo she had to fuck with somebody for over half of their life.

[@ajjamsen694]

If OP's wife had been honking the clown prior to the party, why the card? You'd think she'd already have his number beforehand 🤔 a lil momento maybe? Doubtful Krusty the Clown was the only one she had been clowning around with though

[@cantduckinbelieveit7426]

The wedding thing. Absolutely not. The bride knew exactly what she was doing. There is no way she didn’t know that those roles are traditionally for children

[@joonebugg]

As a lesbian, I have really mixed feelings on the story about the wife coming out, obviously being able to come out is a difficult process. Especially when you have homophobic family members that you don't want to disown you However overall the wife's act of lying was selfish, no one gained anything good from it. She was obviously thinking of herself when she lied to OP I feel bad that OP's wife had to lie. But communicating with her partner/spouse would have been much better when she figured out out was lesbian. I don't know why the wife wouldn't have thought this in the first place OP is valid for being upset at this. He was lied to for years and years. Who wouldn't be upset at that? If anyone were in OP's shoes, they'd feel the same and feel like all their time was used for nothing I hope OP gets better, since this is a lot to get over and I imagine they're not doing well mentally Edit for TLDR: The wife is not the villian for coming out, she is the villain for lying to OP for 25 years Edit 2: what the fuck

[@RealCoolstriker64]

Yeah, I’m gonna clap back at this. “I feel bad that OP’s wife HAD to lie” Then I’ve got good news for you! You don’t have to feel bad BECAUSE SHE DIDN’T. She had a WIDE variety of options, the best of which being: “not getting into a relationship!” Everyone here assumed she didn’t know but op never said she didn’t. And to be quite frank, unless it took her 25 years to figure out it doesn’t factor in at all. (I’m in the closet too, FYI) Because she didn’t tell him when she did figure out, and still decided to wait until her dad died to come out. Fuck this woman. She deserves no sympathy.

[@KazzleTheDazzle]

I agree, he 100 percent has a right to be upset.

[@jariccacierra8445]

maybe so, but the way he describes her and the situation is absolutely DRIPPING with homophobia. I wouldn't be surprised if he bonded with her dad over it. She was probably afraid to come out to him 25 years ago when we didn't have equal rights or safeties we have today. he deserves zero symathy

[@chriswacker2314]

@@jariccacierra8445 Way to put the blame on someone for being angry over being lied to for 25 years and getting literally "stolen" the biggest part of their life just because you sympathize with someone for being homosexual.

[@noodles9538]

@@jariccacierra8445 i feel like another option would be to leave him when she found out, even if it was hard to be out at the time it's still a safe option rather than lie to him for 25 years which was the reason he's upset rather than it being the fact that she's a lesbian

[@FlashQuatsch]

I'm an artist and draw clowns and one time someone asked me if I had any NTR stories with clowns, I guess they're not as uncommon as I thought. Feel so sorry for the guy, cheaters are awful.

[@DarkWolf22k]

(◕દ◕) she insisted on hiring the clown because she already knew him lol... I don't know how hard it is to figure it out... The guy dressed up as a clown to screw her...

[@TheColorHopeIsBlue]

That last story is so frickin cute. My boo does similar stuff with things on my tumblr. Sometimes I’ll reblog ads for little trinkets or plushies or whatever just because they’re cute, and he’ll surprise me with those items as gifts (note when I reblog these things I’m aware that he might randomly surprise me with them, but he’s under no obligation to buy them just cuz I reblog them.) He did that for my birthday this year, as a random treat over the summer, and for Christmas. He’s my sweetheart.

[@carlolombardi1998]

6:25 When you were telling your little story about the guy in your creative writing class, I was mostly thinking, "How does someone _not_ know that the flower girl is a young child?" I'm currently a 23-year-old guy (going on 24) and I've known this fact for roughly fifteen years now.

[@DHTheAlaskan]

You would be surprised what slips through the cracks.

[@86Kadi]

Exactly! I’m from a country where flower girls are not a thing and I have known since forever, just through various movies and shows. So not knowing seems almost willfully ignorant.

[@carlolombardi1998]

@@86Kadi I mean, here in the States, the flower girl and ring bearer are common in medium-to-large scale weddings. Not so much in small scale weddings.

[@snowyyconez]

Yo the people that are claiming that OP is homophobic because he's RIGHTFULLY furious at his ex-wife for lying to him are a new level of ridiculous. Why are we victim-blaming this poor man that based his entire life around a lie? I can understand being terrified of a parent's views, being a closeted demisexual in a conservative family myself, but there is no excuse for bringing down someone else WITH you. At all. None. We gotta do better, man, like come on now. I hope that he finds happiness, however it may reach him... Most of us know he needs it.

[@angel_t3338]

I am close to someone who went through something very similar to OP but for a shorter amount of time and without children involved and now that they are divorced, they have an inability to trust others which has made dating very frustrating and terrifying. They were super supportive of their ex coming out, but it’s been about a year and has a wall longer and taller than the Great Wall of China when it comes to dating others now.

[@wannabehistorian371]

I’m sorry, but there’s nothing to be afraid of being demisexual in a conservative home. Just describe what it is instead of the label. Trust me, they’ll easily accept you if you don’t describe it as “demisexual”. Or even if you do, just describe what it is well and you’d be fine.

[@frances_frenzy]

Im demi too and in a deeply religious family. Stay strong friend

[@metademetra]

@@wannabehistorian371 Not really, because from my understanding, a demisexual can form a deep connection to ANYONE. If that someone happens to be someone of the same sex, OP is absolutely fucked.

[@wannabehistorian371]

@@frances_frenzy If you explain what being demisexual actually is then they’ll accept you. No need to be afraid.

[@Hybrid301]

So he got with his best friend’s girlfriend and is also hot for teacher? Sounds like his now ex GF got an appetite for destruction.

[@Nerobyrne]

nono, Teacher's assistant, means that he's the teacher and basically banging his intern/trainee. Which kind of adds an abuse of power angle to the rest of this clusterf*ck.

[@shanelbryant5638]

Ending on the super wholesome note was exactly what I needed. I was so scared the entire time it would end badly and really it’s just two people who love each other. Also OP, she definitely knows. She just doesn’t want to ruin your fun

[@Shay_Mendez]

25 YEARS of lying. Yeah, the husband has a right to be angry. He doesn't hate his kids, just her for keeping the lie going on for so long. So long that she didn't even have the stomach to tell the person who she's supposed to be able to trust more than her own family.

[@X-CALABA]

The one where the guy’s wife came out kinda hit me in the heart. It did this because I had an ex that came out to me. I’m pretty sure she was already cheating on me behind my back because she was getting distant over a few weeks and I caught on. I assumed the worst and I’m pretty sure I was right, but I wasn’t mad. I just felt empty, but I was also glad for her since she felt herself. She asked “why aren’t you mad? I thought you'd be mad.” through tears. I simply stated “I kind of saw this coming, and It’s not really worth fighting a battle that you’re losing this bad.”

[@thomasnuckolls1883]

As a gay man, the dude who's wife came out after leading him on for two decades was vile. You should never do that to another person, regardless of what you need in life. If you need a cover, find a gay guy looking for similar... Or better yet a therapist.

[@Tues48]

I could see myself going down the gay wife's path if I never had therapy help me set boundaries. I tried to only date people my mom would like and not necessarily what I would like. I was afraid of what she would do to me if I disobeyed and yeah a lot of bad happened after I started standing up for myself but I'm glad I did it sooner rather than later. I sympathize with the wife cause I could have had a similar life

[@lonewolf9578]

@@Tues48 she lied to a guy and wasted decades of his life just because she was in the closet She could have been honest with OP but she wasn’t. That’s just cruel

[@Tues48]

@@lonewolf9578 should she have made a deal with op? Would op have agreed to knowingly marry a lesbian to ensure her safety? She needed a beard.

[@sakurasam6101]

@@Tues48 that's what I was thinking too. It's one thing to not open up to your folks...but don't lead on someone who thought you loved them.

[@Tues48]

@@sakurasam6101 she might love him as a person but not sexually. She could love him as the romantic partner and father he is but not as a sexual partner. Love comes in many forms

[@SubwaySweden]

Regarding the clown story...... the biggest blow to my manhood I have ever taken was at a x-mas party at work. It was quite a big company so I maybe knew 10% of the people that where there, I had been interested in a girl that worked reception and at this x-mas party I was gonna make my move. We flirted, we laughed, we drank etc. and at the end of the night the people we had been partying with all decided to call it a night, I asked if she wanted to come home with me and she agreed. We got our coats and as we where all about to go out the door a guy in full Santa costume with beard and everything came up to her, whispered some stuff in her ear and out the door they went. My workpall that we where supposed to share taxi with was a bit slow getting his coat so I waited for him... when we got out the door I could see her and santa get into the taxi I ordered and leave..... not that I was devastated but my friends at that company sure had fun teasing me about that Santa stole my one night stand for months.

[@Logitah]

The second story made me chortle out loud. The boyfriend is laughing in his grave! XD Story #7 made me tear up a little. Losing someone is the greatest pain you can go through! I'm glad that OP and her had that experience together.

[@JohnGaltShadow]

DarkFluff is a good channel too on the same type of content.

[@mracula1667]

I can not fathom the depth of betrayal of having a partner of 25 years admitting you were just a prop to satisfy a homophobic father. This isn’t a happy coming out story for OP. It’s a 25 year lie and his ex seems to have no regard for OP. I feel so sad for him.

[@pathoesr7872]

I'm wondering if it's that simple. I'm Bi and spent a long time trying to convince myself I didn't like girls because I was raised by homophobic parents. My advantage was that I liked guys too, but when you're raised that way there's a tendency to question yourself. So could've probably started sincerely out of that same confusion, and by the time she realized there were kids involved. Not saying that's what happened, but it can be confusing.

[@indieh9]

@@pathoesr7872 Yeah.. And plus if you think about 25 years ago, queerness was very NOT talked about, especially if OP and his wife come from a conservative culture. Many people even in their 30s and 20s didn’t even know that being gay was a thing, and when compulsory heterosexuality is thrown into the mix, people just do what they perceive to be their duty, and get married to someone they’re not attracted to.

[@mracula1667]

@@indieh9 I recognize what you’re saying. I’m a pansexual man in my mid 40s. I was out when I was teenager. People weren’t ignorant of the existence of queer people back then. All though I understand how complicated sexuality and social norms are to navigate, OP was used as a beard without his consent. Using someone to cover your sexuality is wrong in the same way using someone for their money or looks is. OP’s former partner should have given him far more compassion in how difficult this was on OP. He really seems to be struggling and he needs to hear it from her that she recognizes how hard this is for him. He needs to know he’s not being homophobic or terrible for his feels as long as he deals with those feelings in a healthy way.

[@jariccacierra8445]

just say you're homophobic and go

[@mracula1667]

@@jariccacierra8445 Relationships/marriages are about more than sex. Having 25 years of your life being flipped upside down on you is difficult. No one should be so flippant about that they are like “plot twist, I’m gay, aren’t you happy for me? Dueces.”

[@semperignotus]

That last story is just so adorable and heartwarming

[@RAC00NFANGIRL]

Yes! I hope have lovely marriage

[@ginarosie]

Really? Because i find it a huge invasion of privacy. I mean i cant fault him TOO much because it is his spotify account, but i find music to an EXTREMELY intimate thing for me. I absolutely hate telling people, even the ones im closest with, what im listening too. If I found out my partner was secretly listening to my playlist without my knowledge I would be so upset. Not breakup upset because he has good intentions, but id definitely need a lotttt of space cause damn....

[@semperignotus]

@@ginarosie I see how you may have that boundary, but that’s not something the average person has. Most people happily share what music they enjoy with each other, wether as a general point of conversation, to try and get other people into it, etc. People listen to music with others, go to public concerts etc. Music is typically part of someone’s externally visible personality. Not to say that you are wrong for being the way you are, as that’s perfectly fine too. For my perspective, the fact that OP takes the time to pay attention to what makes their SO happy so that they can continue to make their SO happy is genuine care and love for another and is the ideal type of relationship. Taking time to understand your SO and do what you can to make them happy.

[@ginarosie]

@@semperignotus I mean I get that. I understand that for most people music isn't that private. But completely apart from that I would feel so disrespected if my partner consistently acquired information about me in any shape or form that I didn't feel comfortable sharing. I feel like if I have something (in this case a playlist but could be anything), and I haven't chosen to share my feeling about it to my partner yet, then it's just wrong for them to spy on me. I find it really creepy even if it wasn't music...

[@semperignotus]

@@ginarosie that totally makes sense and I get that. However, by using his Spotify account, she actively made the choice for that information to not be private. By using a shared account they both have access to and have to share access to, anything she listens to isn’t private. It’s not a separate profile, or information that is kept separate and you’d have to go out of your way to find.

[@thehowlinggamer5784]

That coming out story though... This. This is why we need to have discussions in school because it is deathly important to ensure that we understand what being gay really means and why people need to feel free to be with people they love, and not forced into relationships because of someone else's insecurities, even their parents and set up support groups for it.

[@RealCoolstriker64]

First of all, NO. If you mean “highschool” then yeah, but anything before that is forcing it. Because you can’t teach anything to kids at/before middle school without forcing it on them. That’s just now kids work. Second: that doesn’t apply here BECAUSE SHE KNEW. She INTENTIONALLY chose to come out after her father died. She had over 8,900 chances to stop and only did so when it wouldn’t inconvenience her. She’s a terrible person, and no amount of saying “it’s ok to gay” would help. (This comment has been made by someone in the closet because of their parents, FYI)

[@thehowlinggamer5784]

@@RealCoolstriker64 Um, no. So what, you think it's ok for grade schoolers to harass, or be harassed and bullied because their same sex parents drop them off at school? No. This is what I'm talking about here. For crying out loud, gay teachers are being forced to hide that part of themselves, but it's perfectly acceptable for straight teachers to have pictures of their significant others while gay teachers can't? This is not only workplace harassment, but straight up bigotry bring codified into law. Yet the fact that delusional morons like yourself pretend it's about nothing but 'forcing it onto students' is not oy pure bullshit, but only makes things worse.

[@LittleParody]

@@RealCoolstriker64 Personally I think that middle school would also be a good time to give education, since kids are also given sex-ed during that time as well(I know because I remember that annoying as all hell abstinence shit). If kids can be taught about sex/abstinence, they can be taught about LGBTQ subjects. Plus it'd probably be helpful too, since most kids are going to be either already going through puberty or starting puberty during those years(and those are the years where there's probably going to be a lot of questioning going on).

[@thehowlinggamer5784]

@@LittleParody exactly. I'm also talking about going further in trying to create a safe space in schools for kids to come and talk to counselors. One's that will actually sit down and talk with them about what they're going through and help reach out to their parents if they're facing that kind of discrimination at home too.

[@katestarnes1709]

@@RealCoolstriker64 Hey, I’m seeing you everywhere in this comment section, and it seems like you’re dealing with a bit of internalized homophobia. You cannot “push” being queer onto people. If a child is old enough to understand straight relationships, they’re old enough to understand queer ones. You can’t force someone into being gay, just like you can’t force someone into being straight.

[@mostar1219]

Trueoffmychest is generic; you never know if you're gonna get a wholesome story or something c*****. That being said I did not expect a wholesome story after the clown one

[@TheNomad94]

"c*****"? What is that supposed to be? "crappy"? Do we censor "crappy" now? We're all adults here.

[@mostar1219]

@@TheNomad94 ask the speech to text feature on my phone

[@TheNomad94]

@@mostar1219 They do that? Can't you turn that off? Seems very annoying

[@mostar1219]

@@TheNomad94 Yeah does that often. I'm not sure how to really change that

[@SneakySalaXander]

@@mostar1219 For android: Open Speech-to-Text > settings > switch off “Hide offensive words”

[@DominicanaChika]

25 years??? Wow. He has every right to be mad

[@VoidDreamkiller]

The fact that the guy in the virginity story feels so guilty about it despite complying with his friend's wishes and yet still feels like he might have done something wrong proves how much of a true friend he is. Someone who takes advantage of people wouldn't even sweat about being opportunistic, let alone post about it and actually manage to seem sincere

[@velveteenrabbit5940]

The sad thing about the “I ruined his life” story is that he found her reddit post and foiled her plan via canceling the party and telling his family not to talk to her because they’re going through a rough breakup I think she still ruined him tho

[@albertgongora6944]

Did anybody else shed a tear when the original poster who shared the story about how they give their friend time from their most biggest wish which is to have their first time with somebody they trust because I thought that was just beautiful and the way everything was set up for her as well if me and my wife forever and I stayed in her life where we're dying for something I would love to do something like that for her one last time or we do something together with my last time

[@RAC00NFANGIRL]

I hope their friend in heaven and enjoying what up there.

[@declaniii6324]

That sounds like a nice sentiment but I have no idea what you said because IT WAS A SINGLE SENTENCE THE SIZE OF A FUCKING PARAGRAPH. How am I supposed to read that?

[@bellerain381]

This story actually gave me “A Walk To Remember” vibes and it was so beautiful!

[@KumiChan2004]

I get the feeling that the friend had stronger feelings then they let on. But knew it would be harder if they expressed them on the poster then. So she let it be at that.

[@albertgongora6944]

Dude I think you're the only one that has a problem here and if you can't understand it I'm sorry about that but everyone else seems to be capable of understanding it and not only that it's a common in the comment section I really don't have to fix anything for you it's not a job application sorry to say it like that but it's the truth it's KZbin It's comment section

[@RealCoolstriker64]

The amount of people showing sympathy for the lying wife here is appalling. “Oh but she didn’t know!” YES SHE DID. She *deliberately* came out the June after he died to minimize backlash. Because “you can’t be mad at someone for coming out during PRIDE MONTH.” And before people try to say “oh by homophobic family is hard” I know. I’m living in the closet right now because of it. But I would *NEVER* use someone like that. Let alone for 25 years! That’s a quarter of HIS MAX LIFE, *if he’s lucky.* What she did was unforgivable, and does not deserve sympathy. She *should* be hated. Not for her sexuality, but for being a manipulative uncaring monster who uses people like objects only to discard them when they are no longer needed. There are multiple types of love. You don’t have to love someone like a partner in order to love them as a human being with dignity and value. She didn’t.

[@katestarnes1709]

Just because she was aware by the time she came out doesn’t mean she knew the whole time. Maybe it was something she came to terms with after her fathers death, maybe it was something she realized a year or two back. You people don’t know this woman, none of us do, and assuming these things of her with no logical basis is vile.

[@cherrytree91]

@@katestarnes1709 op states that this whole time he thought he was happily married, she’s been in agony and forcing herself to be ok with having sex with him, and that they only had sex like every few weeks, so sounds like she has known for a while. The thing is even if you are confused or in denial about your sexuality, that’s not a reason to ruin someone else’s life. You have a choice, she could have remained single, not go so far as to marry someone and have children with them, so not only has this woman destroyed op’s life but she’s also turned the kids lives upside down. I’m so surprised how little thought some of these comments have for the children in this situation, they now have to go through their parents divorce and eventually when they are old enough they will find out why.

[@katestarnes1709]

@@cherrytree91 It is extremely common for religious straight women to not be sexually satisfied in their relationships. That isn’t something that would automatically make someone assume they weren’t straight, especially in an extremely homophobic environment. And I don’t think you understand, being in denial or being unaware that you are queer means that *you believe you are straight*. People who believe they are straight get into straight relationships. This situation is a result of a homophobic religious environment, and both parties lost 25 years of their life to it

[@cherrytree91]

@@katestarnes1709 the wife came out after her homophobic father dies, that isn’t just coincidence. And op never mentions anything about religion that’s just speculation on your part. You don’t have to be religious to be homophobic. Ok let’s say she honestly believed she was straight and just didn’t enjoy sex with her husband, that is something you communicate with your husband about not keep it from him for 24 years and so maybe if she was honest with him and sat down and had a conversation about how she feels about sex, then they may have figured out there was something deeper going on and maybe go through therapy and get some help. Instead of choosing to string him along for 24 years. You always have a choice and there other ways instead of destroying someone else’s life and bringing children into this mess.

[@cherrytree91]

@@katestarnes1709 also op states “I get it. She was so far into this lie that it was difficult to find a way out, and now expects me to understand” she obviously was aware of her lies and how deep she was in…more evidence that she probably has known for a while. Doesn’t sound like someone who honestly thought they were straight this whole time..

[@DeadBirdsLoveabyes]

At my brother’s wedding they had one of their guy friends be the flower girl. It was so funny and the guy had a blast throwing flower petals everywhere as he danced down the aisle. So it doesn’t always have to be a little girl.

[@cheridadillard-ferguson4658]

One of my guy friends did the same. His friend did a sexy dance down the aisle while throwing petals 🤣

[@pixelpie05]

Same thing happened to me minus the kids, 9 years of my life living with and loving someone who didn't love me. It was all just a show because he was in the closet. I'm pansexual myself but he's gay. I freaking married him and spend all of highschool and afterwards with him, and no matter how hard i tried or how much I loved him, it was just never returned. I feel dumb for not figuring things out sooner because of how he treated me, too.

[@Dani.J.]

The sister knows that flower girls and ring bearers are typically children, that's why she asked the 2 smallest people in the family to fulfil the roles.

[@dylie4303]

Ok, so I'm entirely supportive of people coming out of the closet, and I understand that homophobic parents make that EXTREMELY bad process. I mean, my uncles are homophobic, so when I had boyfriends, they pretty much disowned me. My dad sorta left, but not for the same reason, so I basically just had my mum as support for life from that point. I understand, I do. But THAT... that is disgusting. I don't care how long it's been. She destroyed her husbands sanity, destroyed his entire world view. How can he ever expect to love someone new? That's gotta bring up MAJOR trust issues. "If my wife of 24 years lied to me about loving me, who can I trust?". He spent his entire youth, pouring his soul out and doing his best to be a husband and father... and all to enforce a lie. She gained her identity... by destroying her family. I can't imagine being with someone, and lying to them for 24 years. You don't have to tell your parents that your gay... you could have JUST told him the situation, fairly early on. But that's just it, he might have left at that point. Who wants to be in a one sided relationship? She just used him for her image, and as soon as it suited her, dumped him in the trash and then expects acceptance from the man she completely destroyed so that she wouldn't have to face consequences. It's not homophobia to call her one of the most disgusting examples of a human being. The human race is worse off with her in it. Props to that OP for making sure that their children wouldn't have to pick sides. They deserve to know someday, maybe when they're adults... at least I think so. Cause frankly, I don't think she deserves to keep it private from them. She lost that privilege. Maybe that's just my anger talking though... what a horrible experience :(

[@RealCoolstriker64]

Agreed up until the end. Tell them now. Sit down with the wife and kids, tell the kids: “mommy has been lying and now she has to tell the truth” and have her say EXACTLY what happened. Make sure to fact check. Of course in a kid friendly way, but like, fuck her. She deserves but 3 things: jack, shit. Oh, and hatred from everyone she lied to.

[@silverflight01]

Story 4: Wow, that has got to be one of the most disrespectful things ever. I wouldn't be surprised if they want nothing to do with the her anymore

[@KashemLondon]

The fact that op in the first story is afraid of clowns made the first story so much funny and sad

[@mizlizthursday]

Just wanted to say, great job on all of your vids! I listen to your podcast all the time and have heard them all at least 5 times!

[@SkipperBoy]

Ok, that last one with the music is just so freaking adorable!!!!! He knows she’s up and ok and getting ready for work, and gets to enjoy listening to her favorite music with her, when though she’s miles away. And that’s just so beyond cute! You can tell how much he loves her!

[@seaseamurdock6735]

Flower person is actually something anyone can do and im sure for the rings its the same. Her reason however, for picking her sister and her husband is messed up.

[@buff5158]

The world burn story: there was actually an update where it turns out he found op's post and he tried to do damage control by not showing up w/ his family. She still went thru w/ sending all the receipts out tho and getting the car back.

[@Lilyugiproductions]

Well that’s good at least she sent the receipts to the people that need to know about it

[@12yroldedgelord41]

The story is def fake

[@OmegaGuess]

Re: The Lesbian Wife. I want to preface this with saying: husband is *absolutely* right to feel hurt and betrayed. She had 25 years to try to process and work with this. He just had this dropped on him. But worse than cheating is...extreme. Her father made his position clear with her brother, and that's enough to put fear in any young girl, and she tried to appease that. And the lie grew and grew until it was out of control. His anger should not be begrudged, but I hope he can see there was undoubtedly love there, even if not in the type he thought there was. He should step back, and be given time to heal, but for all involved, I hope he can reconcile her real feelings as well as the false ones.

[@OmegaGuess]

Also, I wish to point out, he's upset about losing his "best years" to a lie, but...if we're being fair, so did she. And While he lost his without knowing, she did trying to appease her asshole of a father.

[@mariposa9506]

@@OmegaGuess she didn't lose her best years though, she made a deliberate and informed decision to live that way while stealing the choice from op.

[@OmegaGuess]

@@mariposa9506 She was as young as he was and lived the same lie he did. Again, I am not saying his feelings of hurt and betrayal are not justified. They absolutely are, and he absolutely is right to feel them and to express them. I just hope he can come to a place and at least understand she’s not the evil witch he’s making her out to be. The situation is a lot more complex than “she lied.”

[@Katey4ever]

ok, that last one was so sweet and wholesome... I hope OP gets away with sneakily having his gf take his spotify for a bit so he knows what music she is into lol. adorable

[@sheeptasticSeb]

Early gang, cheers for the support for rSlash!

[@Randombookwoorm]

CHEERS!

[@sweetiepieconstatine7200]

Cheers

[@Kait_B_]

The bride specifically asked her sister and her boyfriend to be in the wedding because they're shorter than all the kids. There is no way in hell she didn't know ring bearers/flower girls are typically children.

[@noey75]

The first story reminds me of that CSI episode where there husband walks in on his wife "boinking" the clown. Turns out the wife had a clown fetish and she would hire clowns alot. Anyway the husband loses his temper, dumps the clown's body in skid row, and the wife keeps the clown's clothes so her husband could wear them later on for "fun".

[@hollydueck3209]

The first story is literally the childhood backstory of Stan from American Dad 😂😅

[@thatlycantomboy]

the “i ruined a cheater’s life” story actually had an update where said cheater managed to avoid OP’s plan b/c she posted it all on Reddit like a James Bond villain. Word to the wise, folks: don’t unveil your grand revenge plans before they occur.

[@novamarpo3]

Yup, absolutely

[@HobieInTheBox]

Story 6: I wouldn't go as far as to say what she did was evil, but it was extremely hurtful. Some people only find out they're gay when they're older and already married, so in that case it's a painful surprise for everyone. But she knew, and it's on her for dragging OP into it. She should've stayed single instead. That's easier said than done when she's being pressured into following traditional roles, but staying single would've even saved her some trouble. This was just cruel.

[@theplaintech]

It should also be noted she got quite a lot by manipulating her husband so she had not just the essentials from her husband but she got a lot of things she wanted as well. Is it possible she was also a gold digger as well as a lesbian? If we were to take 'gay' completely out of the picture, what does this really look like? It sort of looks like abuse.

[@15stargamer98]

@@theplaintech If we took the word "gay" out of the picture, it'd be an entirely different story because you're severing so much context and nuance behind her actions that the original story did have.

[@theplaintech]

@@15stargamer98 Not necessarily, particularly if this describes the typical entitled western woman.

[@15stargamer98]

@@theplaintech You... do realize that the situations around LGBTQ+ people and the legality of their continued existence, as well as them having the right to be in any marriage other than a heterosexual one, is less than a decade old, right? And that within the time period that the poster and wife were married, there were literally countless times that LGBTQ+ people were persecuted for being LGBTQ+? And that by separating that from her actions, you lose a lot of important context for the whole story?

[@theplaintech]

@@15stargamer98 I realize what you said. You should note that persecution was NOT the reason she stayed with her husband. She could have chosen nearly any other course and probably been free of persecution. The persecution aspect was much less for lesbians than it was for gay guys. There is no reason to give her a pass because of LGBT when, while she was married, it was not an issue. It's convenient to have a ready excuse for bad behavior. It's concerning that you would be an enabler for her abuse of her husband as an entitled person. But then, I suspect that you are not seeing that and will not see it because it's easier to virtue signal than address the real problems.

[@rekasha4598]

For the dying friend story if I'm remembering the details right that story is the exact same just with major details left out like he had cheated on his girlfriend with the dying friend and was pissed that she left him over it when she had repeatedly said it wasn't something she was ok with him doing. He also left out the love confession that the dying friend gave him first and how from the girlfriends perspective it looked a lot like the dying friend was emotionally manipulating OP into doing it with her and the whole situation seemed very wrong. I might be completely wrong tho it's just odd to me that this is almost the exact same story word for word but with those details cut out if it

[@Shikaku2]

I'm sure this story happened multiple times with different people. You might just have read about a different set of people

[@rekasha4598]

@@Shikaku2 yea probably. It's just super similar lol

[@melissacolby3313]

rslash the one about the wife coming out- we don't know her situation or why she didn't tell her husband til she did. I can't call her an idiot or a liar when she's probably been struggling with who she is.

[@Tajarim88]

The wife who came out. Wow. What a scumbag, to string her husband along like that.

[@RealCoolstriker64]

If I was a beard for 25 years, then I wouldn’t “make a face” for the kids. Fuck that. We’re sitting them down and telling them EXACTLY what she did. Because that act of sheer callous disregard DESERVES hatred.

[@RealCoolstriker64]

This is coming from someone who’s also in the closet, BTW

[@katestarnes1709]

@@RealCoolstriker64 What if she didn’t know she was gay? I don’t understand why everyone is assuming she knew she was a lesbian the whole time and was maniacally laughing for 25 years straight as she purposefully strung this man along

[@BeanManolo]

@@katestarnes1709 the timing is too perfect for her to not known before. I doubt she suddenly realized she was lesbian right after her massively homophobic father died. OP mentions she was always distant in bed, and that she admitted she felt miserable; So yeah, she wasn't maniacally laughing for 25 years, but she probably knew least for good part of it, but kept married without telling her husband just to avoid being disowned like her brother. She had a miserable life, made OP's life a miserable one, and all that for the underlying problem she would get nothing from her father's inheritance if she came out sooner; Like many others mentioned, she could've got a partner who knew about it (a 'beard'), and keep only a facade to her father. But instead she forced OP into a 25 years relationship she wasn't into, to then reveal she was a lesbian exactly when it was convenient. That's scummy.

[@mariposa9506]

You don't keep kids in the dark to protect your ex, you do it to protect your kids. A loving wise parent who puts their kids needs above their own ego understands that kids need the security of loving and having faith in both their parents for their own mental health, emotional well being and development. It's not about protecting your wife, it's about protecting your kids. Divorce is hard enough for kids without having to hear the dirty details.

[@RealCoolstriker64]

@@katestarnes1709 except she did, so that’s irrelevant

[@CheeseypiPlays]

So there's a concept in lesbian circles called "comphet" -- compulsory heterosexuality. Very very often, the concept of being gay can't even get into your head, so you just assume you're broken and try your best to "fake it till you make it" subconsciously. It's possible that the wife in the story genuinely, honestly didn't know she was a lesbian until after they got married, and at that point, depending on when she figured it out, there's no way to make it work in a way that won't seem like "you lied to me". Just wanted to point that out, so people don't come down too hard on the wife who's just trying to make the most of the rest of her life

[@bigtitmaster]

just no

[@CheeseypiPlays]

@@bigtitmaster I'm not trying to excuse wasting your partner's time, just asking for empathy and spreading knowledge about a phenomenon that's Extremely common

[@Nekratashi]

Don’t come down to hard??? No one cares she came out, people are upset that she wasted 25 YEARS of this poor man’s life.

[@CheeseypiPlays]

@@Nekratashi she also wasted 25 years of her own life, at least he was happy. And, like I said, it's entirely possible SHE DIDN'T KNOW SHE WAS GAY

[@katestarnes1709]

Jesus thank you. Everyone in this god forsaken comment section is acting like she knew the whole time and was evilly monologue-ing to herself for 25 straight years as she purposefully strung him along

[@papermintairplane]

The clown story literally sounds like me playing the Sims.

[@anime-mun]

Huh. Clowns huh? That is kinda funny considering that the reason my wife fell in love with me because I was dressed as Kefka Pallazo from Final Fantasy VI. Never, rule out, the clown.

[@DourdenAdam]

I mean, its Kefka. You get a pass. Best clown bro.

[@anime-mun]

@@DourdenAdam pass? Dude, I married the big titty goth chick. I got a win.

[@crimsonbunny2828]

The last story made me want to cry, it's wonderful to see people be so loved and happy

[@debbymccormack6525]

There's a reason they're called flower GIRLS.

[@ericadventures5045]

For story 7 I feel horrible for OP. He lost his wholee life and it wasnt even worth it

[@Farhan_049]

11:17 So, somebody explain how this is *WORSE* than cheating? I'm not saying it's less than that, but that it's equal. When I was dealing with my emotions after having caught my then-girlfriend in the act, I started visualizing other unfortunate situations that could've sucked harder than this, and I honestly came up with nothing! If I lose my legs or hands, I'll do remote work with whatever I'm left with. If my place is facing a famine, I'll just rough it up with nearby shrubs and insects. If the Earth cracks up due to a strong quake and I fall, I'll just die getting pierced by something. If war breaks out, I'll die even more fast due to bullets or grenades. None of the above situations gave me a broken heart. Be it 4 months or 25 years, the damage is similar in nature and so difficult to heal. That's why I'm of the opinion that whatever happened to this man was neither above nor below, but exactly equal to cheating.

[@darkcircle899]

If you have never been in a relationship that long you can’t understand. 4 months and 25 years are very different because when you see with someone for 25 years they are a significant part of your life. So the betrayal hurts even more. Also cheating is usually a one time lie while what he went through was his wife lying to him every day of their life together for 25 years strait. That’s why most people would say it’s worse than cheating. Not because cheating doesn’t hurt but because of the magnitude and longevity of the lies.

[@Farhan_049]

@@darkcircle899 How is it a one-time lie? I've been lied to for 4 months! That's 122 days straight acting like a slave! As far as I can tell, I did everything that an ideal boyfriend was supposed to do, perhaps even more. The betrayal in the end was awful enough to make me waste 2 academic years of my life! That's the amount of pain I felt. How that man put his words sounded like cheating isn't a big deal compared to his situation. Cheating isn't worse, but it is definitely not better either. He's dealing with 24 years of mockery, while I dealt with 4 months. The pain is the same - being devalued.

[@peak.sidehustles]

I love you doing this subreddit rSlash, you should definitely consider doing it more in the future because it’s really interesting

[@matthewprier4340]

As far as the lesbian story goes, as a divorcee I can attest that it isn't the sexuality that makes it bad it's the lie. Any relationship has to be based on mutual trust and respect and to go for 25 years with someone who you KNOW loves and respects you and not confide in them such a deeply important fact says everything about how little you were invested in the relationship the entire time regardless of your personal issues. She let a fellow human being love her and be open and vulnerable to her, fully committed and supportive of her for 25 years, all the time knowing she was not reciprocating at even close to that level. I am sure she was scared, and ashamed, and felt trapped and alone. However she had the one thing every single person who has ever been in that situation dreams of, a 100% devoted loving partner willing to listen with an open heart. Now, with that said. This is not something a person does for fun. This is something that happens when a society makes being who you are so abhorrent to yourself that it makes you fear the ones you love so much that 25 years of guilt and shame are a justifiable burden along with living a lie including performing acts you may not enjoy or even find offensive knowing it is hurting everyone involved. As of 2022 we are on the brink of repealing laws that pay lip service to legalizing these relationships which, as this story shows, are still very much thought of as taboo regardless of what is written. This is a short tale of lives decimated by hatred and systemic flaws perpetuated for profit and power. There are only victims here, and the only silver lining is it sounds like both parents have a deep love for their children that gives hope for them going forward. I Wish only for them to find healing soon.

[@DanielGonzalez-qk6sd]

I have to disagree on the “only victims”. Sure the wife is a victim of homophobia. However, she also created an intense life altering lie onto OP. That makes her a perpetrator. The only, completely innocent, victim is OP and the kids.

[@matthewprier4340]

@@DanielGonzalez-qk6sd The husband is for sure her victim here, no argument. He should have had the choice to stay or go from early on with full knowledge of the situation. I don't know their dynamics, or the depth of feelings and tolerances, maybe he would have been a loving and caring beard forever if he'd known but that was not a choice he was given and that was all her fault. I also agree the kids are the only fully innocent victims as well. I just didn't like the implication the story was giving that there was a solid black and white here, even as awful as the result was. If it had been 5 years I'd be likely to demonize her, but 25? That's some deep trauma to go for that long or severe sociopathy. And to hold a family unit together makes me lean away from sociopath. Just wanted to make room for some empathy for the lady and hope for the best for them all since it sounded like there was a lot of love and care about to be lost here and we really don't need more of that.

[@deenaverbena]

In the flower girl story, the bride definitely knew, otherwise she wouldn't have asked them. Also, every guy in your class didn't know? Even if they hadn't been to a wedding in real life, there are so many weddings on tv and movies. Some of them even have plots that center around the flower girls (Full House and Modern Family come to mind, but I'm sure there are more).

[@CerebralSupport]

I don't actually see the wife as a villain for coming out as a lesbian. First of all, these a good chance she didn't realize she was gay having grown up in a homophobic household. Second of all, there's such a thing call _internalized homophobia_ where someone can know that they're gay, and recognize their attraction and be absolutely disgusted with themselves for feeling that way and will often live their lives trying to suppress it. Both the op and rslash need to take a step back and realize that woman has suffered her entire life because of something she can't control and did her best for over 45 years to present as a "normal person." She couldn't take the suffering anymore. It's not always a fucking lie, maybe sit back and realized she convinced herself this was the only right way to live.

[@Lordbullywug]

As someone who a) is queer and b) struggled with my sense of identity for a long time, this is not a fair assessment of the situation. I know people can struggle to accept who they are, and I’m sure this wife in this story did. But she came out nearly immediately after her father passed. It very clearly was something she’d known about for a while and was just waiting for the right opportunity. Hell, she even did it during pride month because “it seemed fitting”. She should have told him the second she knew for sure. I understand how hard that might be, but she owes it to op after 25 years. She didn’t have to tell anyone else, and instead choosing to wait until it was convenient is scummy and devastating to the person whose loved you for so, so long

[@CerebralSupport]

@@Lordbullywug As a queer person you should recognize that having someone that extremely homophobic around can be a terrifying experience. She had already watched her father disown one child, and you don't know if that was a traumatic experience for her. Her father's passing might've been the first time in years she felt like she could actually breath. This isn't scummy behavior. Scared and cowardly, yes. But sometimes scared and cowardly is what keeps gay people alive.

[@Lordbullywug]

@@CerebralSupport frankly, I don’t care if it was a traumatic experience for her. It’s not an excuse for spreading her misery to op. If she can spend 25 years of her life with this man, she owes it to him to get up the fucking courage to tell him when she knew. Again, she was not required to tell anyone else but op. But not telling op is absolutely vile. Also, I know that parents can still be scary well after you’re not controlled by them anymore, but she’s 45 years old. Letting herself destroy other people’s mental and emotional well-beings because she’s scared of her father is not an excuse.

[@WhoNeedsNormal]

I cannot comprehend how you live til 23 without knowing flower girls are almost always children.

[@charleneblack2792]

I feel the guy with the story about flower girls. I wrote a story in 5th grade about a kid with a crackhead dad & said he did 6 grams a day. No crackhead in the world does 6grams a day. I got second place. I lost out to a talking toaster. That event still haunts my dreams at 37. 🤣🤣

[@robertk1701]

Guy here, don't remember ever not knowing that flower girls are normally young girls.

[@blakenicholson6014]

Op is alloud to be mad and I'm gonna guess his kids are gonna feel the same

[@mikethor009]

Story 4: HOLY MOLY, that's a LOT of awards.

[@primrosevale1995]

OP’s ‘wife’ in the coming out story is definitely the villain, not for wanting to hide her sexuality from her homophobic parents, but because she straight up lied to OP. She had no reason to keep that secret from him and basically used him as a prop to please someone who didn’t deserve any happiness. She should’ve told him from the very beginning. She could’ve gone full scorched earth and just cut contact with her father to punish him, so that she’s disowning him in a way, and maintain the support of the rest of her family. Even if that wasn’t an option they could’ve easily ‘married’ to satisfy her parents but otherwise lived separate lives, coming up with a way for OP to stand in as her ‘husband’ and keep her own partner a secret from her parents. She hurt OP and no one deserves that kind of pain, regardless of how good her intentions were.

[@kkcuzz]

Exactly. She could have just stayed single instead of hurting a whole family.

[@0827.a]

by no means im i trying to justify everything the wife did BUT there's always a chance she was struggling with very strong internalized homophobia and comp het. I mean not every single lgbt person realizes they're queer, accept it and move on. So many people live in denial because of how they were raised and by the time they could easily come out, they actively chose to deny their own identity til the day they die. This being said, if i was in OP's shoes i cannot imagine the absolute pain i'd feel cause it sounds almost out of left field

[@Richard_Nickerson]

8:30 Use context, rSlash. She said it would be "cute" and the children in attendance are too tall... she knows it's for kids. The fact that you were ignorant of this fact into your 20s doesn't mean it's common. Even in your example, it's only the guys who didn't know this fact. I knew this fact as a child.

[@lanceprima]

Since I found out about rslash, I've never missed a video yet. Keep rocking, mate.

[@keah]

3rd from last story: Buddy, if you think everyone woman who will be in a relationship with you will be in love you, then you really did settle down too early. The spite you have is because of your own inexperience, not because she did anything uniquely villainous. We don’t talk about it but a lot of women marry for convenience/ social pressure/ safety/ etc. Sometimes love isn’t needed or even possible. You’re right to feel hurt but you are showing a dangerous amount of hate for a super common situation.

[@RAC00NFANGIRL]

This isn’t super common! Ooh yes I’ll lie to person have no sexual attraction too 25 years and I’ll ruin kids lives as well! Yeah no I’m not saying because she’s gay im saying this isn’t okay! Ooh but she was pressure when? When was he pressuring the wife get married? If your going lie at least don’t ruin someone life! Jesus I get everyone pro lgbt I am too! But think his husband feeling! She could’ve came out before 25 years passed by! Don’t 👏🏻 lie 👏🏻 to 👏🏻 for 👏🏻 25 years!

[@RAC00NFANGIRL]

Bi sexual person here op who got lied to I feel absolutely bad for him! He didn’t deserve that! 25 years he will never get back! If your gay in relationship someone who thinks you are straight dump them! Heck tell them truth before get married! Because that guy felt heart broken don’t do this too person!

[@Mayjor_Lochardt]

Oh man that friend who had that other friend who has cancer, I know this might sound kinda pathetic but I were him in the situation I would silent cry and she asked "Why are you crying?" I would reply "It's gonna be while till I see you again, I'm going to miss you so much."

[@deerkota]

I feel for the husband in the 6th story, but I also can't say that the wife is a monster. I'm a lesbian, and before I came out, I struggled with compulsory heterosexuality, and then after I came out, I kept feeling like my mom was right, and that I should be able to just force myself to love a man. if the wife was really doing it out of malice/ill intent, then she's awful, but if it's not the case, and she was trying to convince herself that she just needed more time and that it was "just a phase", then... oof.

[@meganbutton4320]

You are NTA for helping your terminally ill good friend fulfill something that would mean soooo much to her and be a safe person to do so with AND you made it special. That's a great memory for you both. And a memory made from Love! Never feel bad about that! Never!

[@Nerobyrne]

BTW, because I was confused at first I looked this up, and it is apparently very okay to call very short humans "Dwarfs". It's important to differentiate them from the fantasy variets, called "Dwarves".

[@hellefur6631]

Its ok, if they call themself dwarfs. It's still a thing in some countries.

[@RAC00NFANGIRL]

@@hellefur6631 at least their not called gnomes..

[@D-M-K-1-2]

The last story's just downright cute, I needed a dose of wholesomeness after every other story was either sad or ridiculous.

[@TRak598]

History about the wife who "came out" is absolutely terrifying. There is nothing to be "understood" about her behavior. He wasn't a dangerous, homophobic man who was pushed into her life. He was a supportive friend whom she USED to not have to deal with her homophobic father. Of course, dedicating 20+ to a cover-up relationship is outrageous, hence why she tricked him into believing that she had romantic interest for him. I'm sorry to break it for all of you "in the closet" but that's a fight no one but you and your homophobic nemesis are obligated to participate in. You are NOT entitled for the direct involvement of others, specially by means of trickery. That's just low.

[@cake_9510]

I'd understand if it was something she at least told him and didn't let him get all invested for 25 years, as most "I can't let (insert person/people) find out until I can sustain myself" relationships are done, but she absolutely ruined that man's life. After she was able to live without her father, that should've been the end of it, because he wasn't worth having in her life if he was such an awful, hateful person. At least then they both wouldn't have wasted their lives with each other.

[@stefantsarev4442]

It really pissed me off, because she totally used him. She used him to hide from her father. (see, daddy, I am married to a man so I am straight) She used him to build up a good and financially stable life for herself. She used him to have children. She pushed him to make all the sacrifices for her sake. And the worst of all - she convinced him that she would want to spend her entire life with him. And in the end? "Sorry, bud, I am a lesbian, I saw no other way." There is another way - like Dabney said, remain single, or at least be honest with your husband - the one who gave up half of his life to be with you. OP, do yourself a favour. DO NOT be kind to her. She is a selfish butthole who abused your trust. She wanted to come out? Take her out of your home. Leave her on the street, or at least in the hands of her girlfriend. And tell everything to your children. She not only left you, she left them as well. Therefore she gave up her right to be a parent and wife.

[@RAC00NFANGIRL]

@@stefantsarev4442 I just feel bad for husband and the kids man… Once they are adult find out what happen! I hope OP tells them the truth

[@jariccacierra8445]

you're joking, right? the wau he describes her and the situation is so blatantly and inherently homophobic I'm surprised he didn't outright call her a f*g and steal their kids. its clear you have no experience with gay people or homophobia

[@indiabindia5036]

the lesbian wife story is so sad. as a gay person, i do understand the fears of coming out, but you should absolutely not pretend to be in lvoe with someone you're not in love with, and especially for that long. if it happened to me, i would feel sick. constantly. for the rest of my life. i would have trouble loving someone again without being paralyzed with fear. if you need to hide in the closet, don't get someone else involved unless they KNOW you're gay and are willing to sacrifice themselves to help you. and if you're getting forced to get married as a lesbian, find a gay guy to be each others beards who is willing to get married himself to give himself his own beard. it's difficult, but it's better than completely backstabbing someone who is genuinely in love with you.

[@ETOPsycho6774]

I feel sorry for op and the clown. 😂 That's not funny.

[@DHTheAlaskan]

I just imagine OP following rhythmic honking sounds when he found out. Its horrible but I can't stop laughing at that mental image.

[@ItsYaBoiV]

Honestly I hate it when anyone in the LBGT+ community acts like us being gay means we get a free pass to hurt someone. If you're in a hetero relationship and you start having conflicted feelings, TELL YOUR PARTNER. If your parents can't accept your sexuality, don't string along someone who loves you and gives you everything only to conveniently drop on them "Hey, I'm gay now that my super religious/strict/homophobic parents are dead, bye."