Saying the Hard Things: The Power of Speaking Up | Amanda Springob | TEDxUWMilwaukee

Life is not perfect. This is something everyone knows. But for some, accepting the asymmetry of life can be a struggle in itself. In this talk, UWM freshman Amanda Springob shares her coming of age story, detailing the highs and lows of her teenage life in her relationships with men, depression, and small-town fame. Along the way, she examines the importance of speaking up, not just in the public eye, but in our private lives as well.
Amanda is a student at the University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee and a motivational speaker in the Wisconsin area. In her free time, she enjoys acting in a variety of theatre productions.
This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at ted.com/tedx

[@donnawoodford8145]

So many lessons-1) looks aren't everything, 2) why do we look for validation outside of ourselves? 3) learn to accept mistakes and move on, 4) listening to your inner voice will likely put you on the right path 5) ask for help 6) being whole feels a lot better than being perfect, 7) if you are in a relationship with someone who puts you down, get out of it fast, 8) forget what society, parents or schools fail to teach, see #4 above; 9) we all want acceptance, but it may come at a very high price, so yes figure out your needs and communicate them unapologetically!!!

[@user-jh6kx1fw9h]

Right, except "unapologetically" is exactly the opposite extreme and it does _not_ work if you come up to someone stronger, better, smarter. Get yourself a beat down that way. ;)

[@luminouswolf7117]

High price indeed

[@barbarawalker7176]

I'm proud of her she did the right thing. What girl hasn't obsessed about a guy. What every woman can learn from this is that men aren't everything there is more to LIFE ALOT MORE! I love how she empowered herself.

[@damson9470]

and for men to realize we have a voice too and don't just have to follow the status quo of being a perfect guy with the self discipline of a philosopher. And tbh if we strive to be that way; we just lose sense of who we really are and what we really want; which goes for all genders.

[@1darkmatterbeatz]

Still useful 4 years later. Ever grateful for the internet

[@kennywally]

U go girl. Stand tall and love yourself. We all have one life. Speak up.

[@notinvegas]

Thank you Amanda Springob...You just gave me hope and taught me why i shouldnt give up and face my anxiety and whatever comes my way ...

[@realNickDags]

A reminder that we ALL need! This girl is great!

[@DanielPSurman]

Public speaking it's a skill we all need.

[@miischaqi2676]

No, not really

[@user-jh6kx1fw9h]

For what, exactly? Don't be ridiculous.

[@inthedriversseat928]

This girl sounds like she's about to cry and it's triggering my reflex to cry in sympathy. Tearing up the whole way through.

[@gabeyoo3717]

damn brah..

[@Nadd108]

So true

[@goromaster10]

...u r week my bby

[@asiamiwillbe]

I know rgt.... Its so squeaky n hard to listen to

[@lindseyshaw9022]

It could be nerves 🤔

[@DMRoper1]

What a wonderful talk. Brought me back to life. Thank you.

[@KoreanwithMissVicky]

It was a beautiful talk. She was being so brave to open up in front of such a large audience. This talk is quite old, but I'm still very proud of her. Thank you Amanda, you are amazing!♡

[@toompie69]

I finally found the courage to ask for a raise. Then I had to wait for 2 months to finally get an answer back and I didn't get a raise after all. Nice.

[@WastedTalent83]

these speech are good for weak willed people who cry about everything in their life, and they can't face a single problem in life without getting desperate, or to go cry to someone about how HARD is their life, when in the end.. there is ZERO hard things in their life. they have no serious health problem, not abusive parents, no other SERIOUS things. they just know the mass are full of SJW and sheeps that will just follow others over a meaningless speech like this.

[@Cindy-bu7ns]

@@WastedTalent83 you have problems

[@WastedTalent83]

@@Cindy-bu7ns sorry i don't think i have, but surely people who cry and never have real problems in life sure will struggle at the first difficulty, and since its easy to cry or to use only fans as an escape for women problems never get solved and depression grow esponentially :D But sure.. im the one with problems..

[@Cindy-bu7ns]

@@WastedTalent83 yeah, from your comments, you sound like you have a whole lot of problems ..like the inability to empathize and see things objectively to just name a few

[@blackpearl1t]

brilliant talk dont stay silent speak up n express ur self

[@jillwilkerson2032]

Easier said than done. I expressed my needs to my brother and he turned around and used it against me. That hurt. So often I express my needs and feelings and people get angry and accuse me of being rude. Most people have just a small vocabulary when it comes to describing what they think and feel. If they are uncomfortable with something that I say, they don’t know any words beyond rude and bad. And they don’t get it that it is their perception that is skewed. They need to place blame on me for their discomfort. They haven’t evolved enough to take responsibility for themselves and their feelings. I find it easier to just walk away.

[@manners7483]

I have never been called rude in my 38 years of life, because I have never been rude. If several people are calling you rude it may be worth investigating to see if you are in fact rude.

[@peppermintmocha3271]

Jill Wilkerson That really sucks. I get it. I know how you feel. You are so not alone.

[@redinabloogs8477]

how do you know its not ur perception that is skewed ?

[@CC-pf9sp]

I understand...I have spoken up too and been judged for it and then these people turned around and made fun of my hurt. Then they never took any responsibility for their behavior. Luckily, I have learned to forgive and move on

[@redinabloogs8477]

@@CC-pf9sp good for u cc...sometimes thats all u can do

[@thehorsebackheroine5950]

Genuine, kind, caring and honest....that's the best place to be:-) And speaking out....I struggled with that ALL my life and the reason I couldn't speak out is because I was afraid of what people might think of me and I didn't want to upset them!! Amanda has done so well figuring that out at such a young age:-) And in only 8 months of therapy too:-)

[@anungoob6450]

she spoke for the life I am living in right now

[@heartwisdomlove]

yes be brave enough to share your truth; speak up for yourself. True, we all need to talk and say things that are hard to say. great talk!

[@cindyhalpern3187]

She was being real. Best wishes to her for a bright future!

[@SydMountaineer]

Perfect example of why parents need to not only be good examples, but to teach their children that happiness comes from within, and teach children ways of life other than the "norm" of our very narcissistic, codependent society - like what Sadhguru teaches and what Lisa A. Romano teaches people who have been a victim of narcissistic abuse.

[@angelalettsome8534]

Thank you Amanda for sharing your story! Your story will continue to help others.

[@agustinpichardo7313]

Any Body will learn from this message.......

[@eddielee8530]

Thank you Amanda, powerful and needed......YSU Eddie Lee

[@SteveA61172]

"You don't gain muscle by staying out of the weight room, and you don't gain strength if you only look at the pretty parts of life"..BOOM!

[@user-jh6kx1fw9h]

I don't think that this girl understands even the basic concepts. xD

[@perciousmatter7001]

@@user-jh6kx1fw9h i completely disagree, she doesnt only admit her weak points shes taking action in getting better ❤💪💪💪.

[@SaraiF60]

Amazing!!! I Love it!!, the life gives you exactly the things that you need to keep your growing, and that's what I received from you, thank you so much!! and god bless you

[@hannahmarie2993]

Amanda, this was amazing! So proud of you! :)

[@janetsanford2342]

So young to be so smart! You are truly learning from your life! I wrote down 20 things you said that I relate to and will try to use as I face my own inability to speak up. Thank you!!

[@connieward9864]

Awesome job, Amanda. Way to choose courage.

[@hannazamri7658]

omg! i feel you girl!

[@prettylashea6056]

I loved your speech. You are AMAZING ❤️

[@piotrwolski6650]

This was a Perfect speech

[@draven_kx7]

I loved this! Thanks for sharing your story, definitely helped understand something about myself

[@arlinegeorge6967]

Great soul full truth . Destined for greatness . Thank you, bless you. All your dreams come true .

[@simoneturner8688]

Wow. Amazing speech! x

[@sharvareeraje2814]

THANK YOU

[@alibeaumont-filder3185]

Thank you ... inspiring, reflective at young age .. incomprehensibly beautiful .. wow .. love that .

[@arashghanbari5907]

Amazing speech. Loved the level of vulnerability she has.

[@piehound]

Yes life is both lucky and unlucky at the same time. What a discovery !!! Thx for sharing.

[@meiraftsegaye3744]

It really can make you smarter then you are like. watch it now! To feel brave not scared

[@seymills]

you are a very brave person :) thank you ! :)

[@milliemilligan3660]

very good one!!!!

[@MissUnderstoodasAlways]

You’re stunning. And inspirational. Thank you 🙏🏽😊

[@winwintori6047]

Very inspiring!

[@karenstoddard9345]

Thank you

[@escajedac2740]

Cheers to you Thanks for sharing

[@maggie0285]

Being "real" at work gets you in trouble.

[@maggie0285]

I am proof of this statement. On May 23rd I got fired from my job for really no reason. But I wasn't happy and I told the truth. I said I didn't trust the plant manager and for that reason he decided it was worth taking my income away. But the stress of not being happy is gone. I was literally dying inside.

[@federicodpc1442]

How did you make it? Cause I m looking fowardto do that but I feel extremely stuck...

[@maggiefriedrichs777]

I agree with that. I have gotten called up to human resources twice in the last 5 years for answering questions truthfully. I didn't make a scene, but I answered direct questions honestly. and boom up to human resources.

[@ArunKumar-lu5bv]

Friend this is comes when u r surrounded by negative people

[@ronaldmcdonald9147]

@@ArunKumar-lu5bv 7s don't hire 10s, nor do 7s make good supervisors for 10s.

[@TheSammieeC]

beautiful

[@feliciap9907]

Nice speech

[@monicabing3604]

why am i crying 😭😭😭

[@yitaowang8547]

Bravery is when you fear something but still do it anyway

[@jessicayoung4456]

Brave girl

[@taukirsyed1769]

Learn to fire if not distance from the wrong people in your life be it in business, relatives, friends etc..

[@davidmelendez913]

Public speaking is hard especially talking to the whole crowd is takes a lot of courage to speak in front of everyone.

[@glendahunt9207]

YEP! Thanks

[@karienbadenhorst7265]

Wow well done girl. Love dit!!!! Maar tog so moeilik

[@jordanpermenter7515]

I love you.

[@osyasa6255]

I am 40. I am in the same situation

[@drabolit]

Get it Joe

[@tobbleboii5988]

who is joe?

[@kale936]

👏👏👏💯

[@alishaanimations3058]

4:04 😳 5:08 Aw 10:50 Oh nooo

[@Arthur026a]

I know what You fell in that moment,because the sal e thing happened to me.i liked a girl since i was eight years old, i Gage a chance to her, but i didn't have the courage to ask ver parents if they permit to stay with her, nerverless whatever.sounds weird when i say that history to my friends.

[@tariqahmed7244]

Great speech , if u dont mind according to me Joe was a Narcissist suffered from NPD . Forget him as a nightmare though difficult . Towords the end u said should speak to the audience or even say 1 person . To this if that one person really helps u and u dump him later even if he maintains the respect for u what should be his reaction according to u . U were in pain he saved u ok maintained a healthy relationship and u Dumped him for no reason . Then why should anyone come to rescue or even help u .

[@UglyKodeee]

Feel like she's performing but I'm still listening

[@nelsonrangel3925]

Doesn't feel genuine, does it? But that's cause life has not torn her apart. She's still very young.

[@rockybuzz3265]

Her voice is tremblig

[@tjguidry7753]

My problem is shutting up...... My bro tells me I tell the truth too much n too blunt 😂😂🤣🤣

[@susancarter3864]

Yeah, you can’t please everyone and everyone is not going to like you.

[@stuconroy8887]

id be your new joe , you have a lot of guts

[@Hey_Jamie]

She makes it a point that she's super comfortable with public speaking. But she literally couldn't sound more nervous. It's like she's holding back from bawling. Wtf

[@liv0507]

Am i the only one who thought her voice sounded soothing

[@Annie261.]

Olivia Shea Um, yes.

[@Sumiyeco_boutique]

Yes

[@annsmith386]

Oh I wish I would be able to hold it all in. That would be perfect.

[@yareyaredaz3522]

Nope... it never ends well. Just be more open and most things in life will go well. Plus the people that love you may think that you are not talking to them because you don't love then... trust me you should trust the ones that love you :)

[@drabolit]

Speaktalk is yet to show me any relief.. You want less problems? Don't ruminate, ever, and control your emotions like, consciously. Meaning, find the roots of an issue, pull them.

[@mariflak]

Next

[@darlenelopez5632]

Just don't do it to an employer. They say they want employee opinion...sure they do. So you can be targeted to be gotten rid of so they can later put in place the very things you were trying to get them to understand in the first place.

[@joeybelea4772]

16:01 bingo

[@rockybuzz3265]

Her hair and shirtis differentin thumbnail

[@godsownlunatics9650]

nice speech child however life is a completely different ball game when T.B.I. along with broken neck, broken back, blown feet and or heels reworks the mind. pain is nothing compared to being bullied for knowing what changes and what does not change. I fell into the wrong realm. I shoulda just stayed dead

[@perciousmatter7001]

Doing okay? ❤ I hope you are.

[@Nik-if4pf]

bognirps adnama

[@nelsonrangel3925]

I know she's saying some profound things; which it's why I sat back and listened to her talk, but I kept wanting to stab my stomach before continuing to listen to her talk. She sounds like she's whining, so my brain couldn't take her seriously. She's young, so she'll get better at it, but I also hope she's getting some voice training. I'm sure people in there where going, "Oh God! How long is this going to last?" PS: Had to stop listening 15 minutes in (most of it really), but I do dig the message. You can take this as "hate" or constructive criticism.

[@SteveA61172]

And you, of course, are perfect. Shut it already.

[@rebeccawhite9379]

The title does not match the speech.

[@djvicemmanuilllpresentsnav8048]

Thanks Drake U rambling little Cutie Frank Sinatra Hugh tune in KZbin My way by M.i. Lord

[@priyabelhekar6643]

Anyone else annoyed by this " Public Speaking Skills" advertise guy flashing all over KZbin 🙆

[@lovesings2us]

I'm glad she didn't get stuck with Joe.

[@tariqahmed7244]

The ones who truely love u will listen . Thts True Yet what if u take advantage of them and DUMP them for listening you when No one was there to listen . U feared a Narcissist father or mother and DUMPED what should he Do ? Place yourself in his place and Reply .

[@BluBerry537]

Amanda Spongebob

[@alikhanahmadi2313]

I thought the same thing hahahahahhaha

[@JojannekevandenBosch]

Yep

[@PrincessJasmine05]

yoooo is joe real

[@aarielx2]

I lasted about a minute and couldnt listen to her voice. Too chirpy for me lol

[@Annie261.]

Audrey Cullen It’s the millennial vocal fry.

[@Wawiwowuwe]

Trembling voice of the public speaker...ergo contradiccio

[@singtalklaughli8999]

So you wouldn't be nervous in front of that many people? I dare you to do it and tell me how it goes my dude lol

[@maq3009]

Nolram Poocs I think it was nerves, because it gets more stable later

[@Sumiyeco_boutique]

I can’t stand the vocal fry. Something that she needs to overcome on public speaking

[@vakina4181]

She sounds like she has A LOT of problems...

[@goromaster10]

she should stop whining

[@caitlincollins8672]

For some reason this girl rubs me the wrong way....

[@eliasjoseph1799]

Caitlin Collins it's the voice I think

[@cheesybobmonkey]

It's the anxiety of public speaking when you have social anxiety and talking about things that make you emotional.

[@Annie261.]

Joe Alias Vocal fry 😖

[@sirraymondluxuryyacht8131]

Her shaky voice is very off-putting. Plus she is a a child. I don't take life advice from kids

[@nickjohnston4416]

Sir Raymond LuxuryYacht couldn’t agree with you more. Caught myself saying “nothing has happened to you yet” lolz

[@nickjohnston4416]

And her voice is annoying. Lol theatre major

[@Annie261.]

Nick Johnston Millennial vocal fry. 😖

[@Sumiyeco_boutique]

Chirp

[@james-r]

I couldn’t watch this, too stage school for me, there’s no need for the drama performance to explain things, it just comes across as corny

[@zhkq]

Worst speech ever

[@juliantreidiii]

Thank you Amanda, but stop whining.

[@m.albayati5925]

Personal story, a lot of emotions and not useful

[@leooz8071]

Weak

[@donnawoodford8145]

So many lessons-1) looks aren't everything, 2) why do we look for validation outside of ourselves? 3) learn to accept mistakes and move on, 4) listening to your inner voice will likely put you on the right path 5) ask for help 6) being whole feels a lot better than being perfect, 7) if you are in a relationship with someone who puts you down, get out of it fast, 8) forget what society, parents or schools fail to teach, see #4 above; 9) we all want acceptance, but it may come at a very high price, so yes figure out your needs and communicate them unapologetically!!!

[@tariqahmed7244]

Great speech , if u dont mind according to me Joe was a Narcissist suffered from NPD . Forget him as a nightmare though difficult . Towords the end u said should speak to the audience or even say 1 person . To this if that one person really helps u and u dump him later even if he maintains the respect for u what should be his reaction according to u . U were in pain he saved u ok maintained a healthy relationship and u Dumped him for no reason . Then why should anyone come to rescue or even help u .