Schizophrenia : My Hallucinations and Delusions

Me Talking about my Schizophrenia.
EDIT: 16/01/2023
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Art Instagram: / albino.fawn

[@baepkta]

I hope she’s doing good today does anyone know?

[@AlbinoFawnArt]

I'm more than okay thank you! I hope you're good also, I'm planning on returning to KZbin in the coming months! Should be really fun & I have some art to show everyone

[@Sarah-ft8jr]

@@AlbinoFawnArt I just watched this video and had a look at your channel and saw you hadn’t posted for 3 years. I got very worried about you, so I’m very happy to read this! 😊

[@Nostalgia_Addict]

@@AlbinoFawnArt So glad to hear that you're doing well 🙂

[@thornphillips1616]

It's good to see you responded that you are doing well. Have you been painting lately?

[@dagrhavarr8866]

@@AlbinoFawnArt When you saw Gabriel, what did he say to you? Did he mention trying to find the gods or David?

[@DonnHowes]

I got diagnosed with schizophrenia 19 years ago as a teenage. Spent my whole life fighting this deadly disorder. I suffered severe depression and mental disorder. Not until my wife recommended me to psilocybin mushrooms treatment. Psilocybin treatment saved my life honestly. 8 years totally clean. Never thought I would be saying this about mushrooms.

[@laurj09]

Congrats on your recovery. Most persons never realizes psilocybin can be used as a miracle medication to save lives. Years back i wrote an entire essay about psychedelics. they saved you from death bud, lets be honest here.

[@RobertaSandra-no3dy]

How do i reach out to him? Is he on instgram

[@DarlingtonFrancis]

I would like to know from those who have solved PTSD and anxiety, if they have solved it definitively and how to understand what quantity of psilocybin to take and when, for how long. And can you really heal without having an addiction? Thanks to everyone for helping me understand, I want to understand if it's something that can help me solve the problem (I have c-ptsd)

[@nicholda436]

Does he make delivery across the country?

[@SharonFalcon-fj7nb]

Yes! Got mine shipped here in Ireland 🇮🇪

[@andrewprograms]

You're the sweetest person. I wish you every bit of luck in life

[@sxunken6801]

Andrew Rye I want her to be my best friend

[@EI_Greko]

@Darwin Lima ignore everything trust me it can go away and go see your doctor immediately

[@Holy_hand-grenade]

She’s seems so drowsy. Poor kid, seems like such a sweetheart.

[@letsbehonest4221]

Holy_Hand_Grenade-of-Antioch because the government keeps her drugged up..

[@informitas0117]

Everyone that didn't need medication seems to think to know if they are good or not.

[@colemarie9262]

It can be the meds, but a blank affect is an indicator of schizophrenia in itself, as is over sleeping. And honestly for any of you who haven't dealt with this get the F out of here with your anti-medication bull. This disease destroys people's entire lives, it truly is one mental illness where medicine is absolutely 100% *needed* to bring a human being back to life. I've seen patients STARVE themselves to the point of needing a feeding tube from paranoia, seen patients hide magic markers inside their own torn open surgical wounds, seen patients cry in terror because life for them is what we see in paranormal horror movies......you DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT IS AT STAKE HERE. Stop, for freaking real.

[@sagebias2251]

It is called a blank affect. It is common with schizophrenia.

[@bandygamy5898]

@@colemarie9262 Indeed!!!!

[@doubletroublerainbow10]

You’re very self aware, which is one of the most important keys to mental health recovery. I promise, everything will get better if you push through. Time heals.

[@thepetkeepergirl15]

I'm schizoaffective and you are my hero for keeping on pushing through this illness. Thank you.

[@Mallus01]

I hope the best for you Hannah, I am going through many of the same things as her

[@kit2250]

Is an a or e?

[@dmtdreamz7706]

I want schizoaffective. If you have something that you really want in your life, spend lots of time thinking about it. The more you think the more ideas will pop up the more creative your gonna start to get. Your subconscious mind doesn't care if your vision is crazy. It doesnt care if you dont know how to do it. When you see a thing clearly in your mind, your creative "success mechanism" within you takes over and does the job much better than you could do it by conscious effort or willpower. A different psychedelic from a different planet every nanosecond. All sorts of dreams are possible. The human nervous system cannot tell the difference between an "actual" experience and an experience imagined vividly and in detail. Synthesize "experience," to literally create experience, and control it, in the laboratory of our minds. A vision is a very emotional image, the most powerful image that you can come up with for yourself at this time. This vision will become like a hallucination in other peoples mind and this could be the cause of them creating extraordinary things.

[@truthshallsetufree1295]

So someone explain that means all religion people are schizo ?

[@kirstentaylor1797]

I've been diagnosed with schizophrenia as well. I was 24 when I was diagnosed. I can relate to everything you say. You are so strong and brave for sharing this. Makes me feel like I'm not alone. Thank you 💛

[@maymayjones9955]

im with you as well

[@asedafghan1]

Send me what app number we can talk about I have same problem

[@bleachdrinked6141]

Courtney Witham it’s a mental illness

[@theawakening2946]

Skitzopheria is BS. People that they say are skitzo are actually just tapping into the spiritual realm. Skiitzo is just an explanation by doctors cause they don't know how else to explain it. I thought I was until I started recording the voices and got them on tape. I then realized I was hearing souls of humans that passed on. Especially my loved ones...I now xan hear my loved ones who have died of overdoses. Skitzophrenia is a lie. Made up by doctors

[@TOM-pn8sn]

Stay strong kido.

[@sagebias2251]

Amen

[@SpoiledxAngel]

You remind me of Luna From Harry Potter 💗

[@vina6239]

Yea!!!

[@hobbygaertner420]

> Your suffering reminds me of that actress from a Harry Potter movie. Stay classy.

[@healurself6968]

Hun I think u r amazingly brave to put this video up! Thankyou for being so brave and explaining to us what it's like. It must be hell to have your brain function like that. You are amazing to have to deal with that. Never forget how amazing you are :)

[@healurself6968]

I have a child diagnosed with autism and anxiety and sensory issues. But he's still too young to figure out what else might be wrong. He's very violent and has said his brain tells him to kill ppl and himself and stuff and when he was younger he said there were two men in his brain telling him bad things, now he describes it as a good brain (blue) and a darkness brain. I don't know if he's bipolar or has schizophrenia or something or if it's just a way of describing his difficult thoughts at his age level. He doesn't say stuff like that when it's quiet and calm for him, I think it's when he's overloaded sensory wise. But at this stage I can't tell. So as a Mum of a kid with problems like that I really feel for you and think you're wonderful for telling us your story cos it helps us to understand it and get rid of the stereo types of someone who struggles with what you do.

[@speakyourheart8548]

heal urself I know this comment isnt for me but it struck a chord in me. The child is very sensitive and it can be hard to understand if people around the child are not. As we grow older we disconnect from that sensitvity. Its within us all,but some of us cant. The tone of a voice we feel deeply, we feel peoples energies-we feel everything. As I said this is actually our natural state of being but in a world that has become very hard it can be painful to have it. If you can truely understand how sensitive the child is the suffering will naturally leave. When we are sensitive because we feel everything deeply we can become angry,frustrated. But remember not to treat that,its a by product if such feeling. Be as gentle as can be,love deeply and look into what it is like for a sensitive child. Beyond any diagnosis . Your child can live a more incredible life than most because they are tuned in,but the sensitivity needs to be nurtured. X

[@bluestogreen1693]

No and yes! Our brains are apart, but you can feel bad energy and i swear its the devil or evil. Good visions (Gabriel) is definately god. God bless man!!!

[@tolget4684]

My wife had it too. She refused any real treatment and I know first hand how terrible it was for her. She was a bit older than you, 35 and had a kidney transplant also. I lost her last year to it. Sorry to subject that part to you but just DON'T give up.ever! You're stronger then you think. Always ask for help, even if every part of you says not to. Pray, sing, paint...whatever it takes, keep fighting it. Good luck to you kiddo and may God be with you.

[@jaylanichole5136]

I’m so sorry, I hope you’re okay 🙏🏽🩵 May please God be with you

[@PeaceLoveAndYouTu100]

I’m so sorry for everything you go threw , it sounds so exhausting and hard , I could never imagine having to deal with all that. You are so pretty , I hope things gets easier for you

[@greerprince4370]

you are very very brave to talk about this (also I love your hair😊)❤️❤️

[@Charlotte-wv1dl]

This poor girl! Stay strong! You're rlly pretty btw

[@fridaymornings_4514]

I'm really sorry about this, I hope you'll be better. :) It is so hard, I am sure. I want to hug you, give so so so much power, best of luck you! ❤

[@Joshua-pn5oz]

Your video helps me feel less alone. This pretty well describes my world. THANK YOU SO MUCH! Keep your head up princess

[@sarahnicole3206]

Sending good vibes and love your way! My husband, my sister and both of my aunts are schizophrenic so we deal with it a lot in our family. Don’t forget you’re not alone in this!!! we are all thinking of you and praying for you sweetie!!! Stay strong love, you got this!!! Xoxo❤️ To those of you who think you know what you’re talking about and have suggested that she doesn’t take her medication, shame on you. you have no idea what this completely incapacitating disease does to the individual or their families......

[@KatieSparkles]

You are so amazingly brave for sharing your story because it does sounds scary what you deal with. I wish you the best of luck with everything, stay strong

[@colemarie9262]

You look like you're doing really well!! Keep it up and just take care of yourself. And good for you for being open about what this is really like for people, so many don't understand what you have to go through.

[@sebastiannielsen9268]

Never usually comment on videos, but this was really touching. So brave of you to talk so openly about it 💪 super inspiring

[@christinamartin1188]

This is such an impressive video. You can feel the pain through every word she says. I really wish you the best of luck🍀

[@LaurenReillyTheFreak]

You are so strong for sharing all of this so candidly with people. I think you will be a great help to many people who see this. I wish you all the best in life and in dealing with this condition.

[@broooowdym]

I’m so sorry you’ve been struggling for so long. Please hold onto the people that love you dearly, at the end of the day they are the ones that keep us going. I love you! 💛

[@user-kys673]

I hope you feel better, you seem like a really sweet person

[@evidenz111]

Well done for being so open about your experience, as I know this is not easy, especially as your recovering. Keep positive !!

[@keith1513]

You are an incredibly strong person I have so much respect for you. I’m so sorry this happens to you. You are giving people that go through this comfort, you’re the light in the darkness.

[@annemariestaudenmann945]

Thank you for your honesty. You're very young and have plenty of time to keep healing and recovering. You seem to be doing well! Keep up the good work! Good luck!

[@peroxideman5292]

It's great of you to tell your story, there's not that many representatives for schizophrenic people. You probably made some of people feel alot more normal and related to not to mention less alone in their struggle. Good luck in the future

[@ramblingbootsIRL]

You’re an inspiration. You will help a lot of people with your bravery x

[@littleolivefox]

Thank you so much for sharing this. I feel like a lot, for about 16ish years, and I'm scared. I'm glad I'm not alone

[@misfitartist8032]

I wish you all the strength in the world, really it most be horrible to deal with this and i will hope that one day it will get better. Until then i will pray that you have at least a few days where the voices and hallucinations aren't as bad. Courage and lots of luck to you

[@misscritter4038]

This video just came up as recommended to me. I noticed it's been a fair few months since you uploaded...7 to be exact, & I thought I'd type this in hopes that if you needed to, you'd see it. I just wanted to let you know that you seem like such a dear girl & you did a very good job explaining some of your life experiences up to this point. In fact, I'm SURE there's someone out there, struggling with mental illness, feeling less alone for having watched this. I am hoping you're finding yourself healthy & well & I wish you nothing but the best. Btw- don't EVER pay any mind to those voices telling you things like you're worthless! I am fully aware of how absolutely real they are to you, as I am a licensed therapist, but they are most certainly NOT correct! You are a sweet & valuable young lady who deserves happiness & health & anyone or anything telling you otherwise is just WRONG.😊❤

[@htttpxxx]

you’re so cute omg, stay strong girl ❤️❤️🤧

[@Iheardecay]

This is the most genuine video I've seen about this subject so far. You are a very strong person! :) I wish you the best. Things will get better! :) I hope you are reading all these nice comments :)

[@truk752]

You’re so strong you have no idea! Don’t ever give up on yourself! I love you ❤️

[@format.7315]

Thank you for sharing your experiences. It's not to easy to talk about these things. I wish you the best in life. Things will get better!

[@headrat1]

Glad you are getting the support you need. You are very courageous and mindful to talk about your experiences with such clarity. Spiritual emergence network supports those with transpersonal awareness. Love to you! 💗

[@sparklingkittenjewels7524]

Aloha and Mahalo. Stay Strong. And understand how special you are. Thank you for explaining your experiences. I can completely relate and i understand how challenging juggling your condition on top of life is. Your story will help many others take consideration and time to get to know you and others like you. Everyone is unique in their own way, fighting a battle no one knows about, until you spread awareness. Love One Another.

[@happydad7821]

Thank you for posting this video. It was incredibly brave of you. I know you are going to achieve greatness in your life. Wish you the best.

[@trying3841]

Thank you for sharing! I am sorry about what your dealing with. Praying for you!

[@KoruGroveArt]

You are so precious...... you’re a gift to this world just as much as anyone else. Don’t be hard on yourself dear. ❤️ much love to you.

[@sandravovin]

Man your eyes are mesmerizing, as if I were starting to feel it all myself

[@Jordanectomy]

I just want to give you a hug. It’ll be okay, just keep taking the help that you need and keep reaching out to people who love you.

[@YazminWright]

hope you're doing well... i'm 23 and had severe psychotic episode 3 yrs ago and suffered with symptoms ever since... love the way you communicate it's very therapeutic for me to watch and relatable. love

[@spencer19811]

You're an amazing person. Not so long ago your issues were perceived to be so bad but nowadays people with mental health issues are much more accepted. Keep up the good work I wish you all the best! Stay classy!

[@coryecho1]

You really are sweet you dont deserve this illness. Hope things get better for you x

[@lukekershaw8954]

You are so brave 💯 thank you for uploading this you did great 💙

[@maialarrea4374]

Wow this is horrible I really want to hug you rn :( I’m very very sorry that anybody would feel like this. You’re so brave, it’s incredible. I hope you get better :)

[@cate2728]

You have such a good grasp on your self awareness. You seem like a wonderful person, beautiful inside out. My brother is on the cusp of BP and schizophrenia. He has a very high intelligence. Have you thought about writing? Turning what’s going on into stories? You’re strong! I hope you’re doing well and have friends around, which I know can be hard. Sounds like you have a whole lot of people rooting for you here!

[@user-uk5cu4vw7o]

good luck and i hope you get it all under control

[@AlbinoFawnArt]

Thank you

[@tuliopereira1996]

Good luck

[@vinnytnecniv]

Wish u had more videos , u give such a good feeling and real interpretation of this mental health problem , your the best and most real on youtube for this, u should do more videos, well done 👍🏼X

[@shingles4947]

Such a precious little angel. Darling, You're just so... gorgeous. Not a bad bone in her body. I wish you all the luck in the world. You're stronger than you'll ever know. Keep taking your meds & remember the condition tends to get less severe as you go through life. Hopefully you'll be able to stay out of hospital & live a normal life - you're such a little gem. You only deserve the best you poor little thing... apologies for being so patronising but I just had to leave a comment as you've taken my breath away tonight Emily. You take care.

[@looselygaming6130]

i really feel for you man, all the best and i wish a way could be found to get rid of these problems for you.

[@andrewwalker9911]

I wish I understood more about schizophrenia so I could truly empathize with people who suffer from this terrible disorder. You seem like a very sweet young lady and I wish you the best. Stay strong.

[@emmanuellopez6442]

I can here the pain in your voice. :-( May god help you keep moving forward and im sorry that you have to go thru something horrible like this

[@tomitstube]

wow, you're unbelievably brave and strong for doing this, so hang in there, so many people learn to manage this illness, nothing to be ashamed of, this isn't your fault. i know it's not the same thing but i tried to quit smoking about 20 times before i did, so the key is to realize every step you take in helping yourself is like building blocks, you may not see the progress sometimes but it's there, the key is to never stop trying until it becomes something you aren't afraid of anymore.

[@nalanibringas]

🥺 I’m so sorry you have to deal with this. I just want to go and be your friend, give you a hug and protect you from everything. Things will get better love, it won’t always be so hard. Things will get easier, take it day by day. You got this. Also, random, but you give me heavy Alice in wonderland vibes❤️ you are so adorable.

[@adamwisecup5599]

I wish you the best and I'll be praying for you. I also suffer from this horrible disease. Best thing you can do is to Keep talking about it. It has more power when you try to ignore them and act like its not there. Do as much research on this as you can. There are new amazing meds and techniques coming out. Hey at least we don't have this disease in the early 40s or 50s. We would have been thrown away but now we at least have a chance of some type of normal life. Stay strong!

[@adambaker9702]

The fact that your willing to record yourself and talk about a illness like this that you have is inspirational to me.

[@simonmahon9387]

Great to hear your voice. Please read up on the medication you are taking. I've never been on percribed medication, but once I took what I thought was ecstasy it literally made my vision, thoughts and emotional actions become like a movie. I knew it was not real. It took 12 hours before it left. It made me realize how people live with this all year long. The best advice is eat healthy, drink healthy (no tap water) exercise, keep telling yourself you can use this to become stronger. What doesn't kill me makes me stronger. You will feel better and will give you strength. You need to rise above it. Make it your challenge. I will pray for you young woman. God bless. You have to fight it...

[@Checker222]

Great deal of bravery to be so open about this- thank you for sharing!

[@razor8j270]

You are an amazing young lady to make this video and talk so open about what you are going through.. You are brave and very strong that I can see I wish you all the best and all the love for you for your future. Don't give up sweetheart your doing great I don't know you at all but feel very proud of you for talking so open

[@earthworldserver]

you're the only person in KZbin that I turn the bells on for - more videos pretty pleasee :)

[@josephsohn2030]

Stay strong & positive, it'll get better. Keep doing a Vlog or diary & share with your therapist. I think u r amazing, brave & so pretty. I have an almost overwhelming urge to comfort u & take away any pain... I truly wish u all the best.

[@HAL-9000.]

Thank you for being so honest with us. You seem like such a sweet person. I hope you are doing well.

[@rainstormr7650]

good vid especially your firsthand info about your past situationl- very nice background behind you - looks great

[@DonQuixote1187]

This is really raw. Thank you for sharing.

[@jammydodgerdodger2309]

You are very brave & have a very sweet spirit. Stay strong too cos there is hope for the future now that many new & effective antipsychotics are available to mitigate the symptoms & help ppl get their life back! Keep going & you will get there 👏

[@fhorsey]

Thank you for sharing your experiences, you explain it well and I'm starting to fathom what my cousin is dealing with. Thank you!

[@FfionCerys]

Hope you are getting on okay - sending love to you ❤️

[@ricominajjz4345]

Awwwh 😭 I’m so sorry , I wish you the best

[@carlykirbyson5896]

Awe, I wish everything is okay for you. I can tell you look drained and tired. Youre strong. 💕 and beautiful

[@evatate1539]

you're so calm and pleasant. you kinda remind me of luna lovegood from Harry Potter💖

[@rikimcleod427]

You are so pretty keep fighting babygirl 💗your so brave to make a video like this I see and feel your pain 💔 I wish u all the best in life love x

[@chezzylee]

Hope you're keeping well, remain upbeat and remember people will support you 😊

[@maximosanchez-aragon7517]

You have all my support. Don't ever give up.

[@codygibson8875]

you are so sweet.. an amazing human.. I'm sorry you have to go through this.. i wish their was a cure that would help you get through it easier.. this breaks my heart :/

[@asabovesobelove6803]

Thank you for your courageous blogging. Hope you choose to continue it, not as a duty to anyone who follows but if it touches your heart. I wish you all the best!

[@tarotinthepark]

Thank you for talking about this condition openly. I think people have a lot of misconceptions and are quick to discredit a persons value based on things they can't understand. The other week I started to serve a customer at the cafe I work at when I recognized some symptoms of schizophrenia, and obviously I'm not able to know for sure but I've been really trying to understand what people with this affliction have to put up with. It really helped me today when she came in telling me I had given her cheap coffee. I offered to change it and I think she saw that I kind of understood because I kept trying to work with her to ease her mind. In the end she couldn't get any coffee :( I felt so sad for her because I am sure she just wanted something simple to comfort her. Is there anything I can say or do in order to be more supportive next time?

[@Chilliy1111]

You are a strong girl that talk about this...Big hug too you♡

[@PesulapDapur]

You are brave, strong and beautiful. I am glad that there are still good and nice people in this world that is supportive and full of love. Hang out with those kind of people.

[@spizsocs7181]

Thank you so much for making this video you helped me know that I'm not alone :))

[@markorbit4752]

Thanks for helping to educate the public about this difficult illness.

[@incaguaya]

Thank you for sharing little sister. Stay strong and may God bring his light over your house every day Amen.

[@olivia.v2132]

Awe you're so beautiful and sweet, I just wanna give you a hug!

[@noemipileri5386]

What I've always wondered is if you hear the voices like another person/being telling you whatever or like a stream of conciousness...like random taughts and conversation with yourself...btw i have so much respect and admiration for you for just being able to get up and go on after all of the things that you have experienced...I really just want to hug you and be your friend...you seem so lovely x

[@justmee5999]

It is like sounds like someone else in the room. They say it's because you get certain thoughts that your brain can't recognize as your own

I want to hug you. This is so hard for me.

[@egodeath613]

But imagine if she was a guy.

[@nickthompson1812]

Ego Death hugging another dude who needs a hug is 100% acceptable.

[@sirdamned9272]

"This is hard for me" while a girl tells you that she has a life changing disease. "Hey, look at me." Btw, your Knight disorder is showing.

[@sirdamned9272]

@Milla Isak how the fk do you know? All he said is "this is so hard for me"

[@magnellseth]

@@nickthompson1812 aye been their.

[@TeeJay-er1nk]

You are an amazing young lady to have the guts to talk about your condition so candidly. Just know that you are not alone. I have always thought of myself as a manly man and I literally lost it about two minutes in and cried more than I've ever cried in my life.

[@Jake_Ro_X]

You're extremely sweet. Makes me want to hug you. Stay strong always and never give up.

[@pastry111]

you're so beautiful and thank you for sharing, hope everything's going okay for you today 💗

[@AlbinoFawnArt]

Hey! Thank you so much, hoping to share some more soon! Hope you're having a good day:)

[@jadebee3599]

Bless your soul, so sad to hear stories like this my mum suffers bad schizophrenia and psychosis and I'm a carer for her, I know how bad she can get and as a 16 year old myself I feel so bad for you:(

[@damtrallan2848]

You are special, many hugs from Sweden ❤️

[@Seth6581]

I share a lot of the same issues as you.I'ts a very dark world when you're all alone and no one can understand what you're going through.I truly admire your bravery and your beauty.

[@samuelnewman8021]

I hope and pray you are doing well now and have found peace. Thank you for sharing your experience. Take care 🙂 💕

[@davidmacon1138]

You're beautiful, courageous and strong. Don't you ever forget it. Keep your chin held high and stay healthy.

[@nardinesandersonauthorpoet4249]

such a beautiful young lady, and so brave

[@innovate1983]

Thank you for your very open and honest account of this. Very helpful.

[@elisavetamilaeva5249]

Constant terror in your head.. Gosh how I wish there was a cure. Stay strong!

[@tamikahaynes9467]

You are very beautiful 😍😍 you are a inspiration to a lot of woman suffering from this illness

[@thepetkeepergirl15]

Thank you for sharing. It’s good to know I’m not alone. Keep your chin up girl