Search Crews Continue To Look For Obviously Dead Hikers

[@kevincrossland1898]

Some people believe the dead deserve a burial. They are buried. Under that snow. Over there.

[@SkyTheGuy8]

1k likes an no comments damn

[@neptune2613]

1.1k likes and one comment damn

[@RSClassicAngel]

1.2k and two fucking comments come on guys

[@rigmahaore6274]

1.3k likes and three comments dang

[@AbuAli-ff8yh]

Holy shit 1.4k likes and 4 comments

[@dmitriyr4095]

I am so relieved that the cameraman got him a dry pair of socks.

[@kansergaming3106]

Yes. But have you seen that CH-146 Griffin Helicopter? Helicopter.

[@giomental]

I love this kind of humor.

[@BlackstoneValleyOrganist1887]

Same

[@otiscrosbie7859]

It's Ben shapiro

[@bobbymcmanus6540]

Could have been bad

[@MrsKwan-fz6mf]

He killed the hikers so he could go to jail.

[@laya8880]

Hahahaaaaa...You deserve more likes.

[@austink641]

It all makes sense now. He DOES know where they are.

[@enregistreur]

Ahahah I just saw the other video about prison, it’s 100% what happened.

[@arturczerwinski2616]

EPIC.

[@Subjagator]

There needs to be more than just 2 videos like this...

[@xennial_miracle]

It's offensive and insulting that Michael Falk is not getting due credit for finding the dead hikers.

[@person-lk5kq]

i bet it's just because he's autistic, smhing my head

[@Gavo-ej4qv]

It's offensive and insulting that the camera man is not getting due credit for giving Michael Falk a pair of dry socks.

[@constantinosschinas4503]

*but can you stack the hikers?*

[@yourMom-ic4wr]

Lmfao so hard😂

[@CBielski87]

@@mandreadfg whats the ref? i was guessing that was more OCD than autism

[@isse6790]

@@CBielski87 Another ONN video where Michael Falk interviews a man in prison.

[@tennisballbird]

Relatable. I have autism.

[@weswheel4834]

Can you stack the hikers? Only once they're frozen. One-on-top-of-the-other. (I like stacking).

[@alejrandom6592]

"Knowing where dead bodies are is better than not knowing where dead bodies are" This is so accurate

[@Yetipfote]

sometimes it's better to NOT know where the dead bodies are xD

[@battlesheep2552]

Suppose it’s better to spare someone of being in the opening scene of an episode of Bones

[@cardiaccoder9622]

Well there’s no need to check my backyard.... that’s for sure

[@scottvelez3154]

I know where those bodies are they're in ma BELLEH 😛😈

[@LosloTypical]

@@scottvelez3154 was that a joke or something

[@a.l.p.h.a.6094]

“My socks got wet. The camera man gave me new socks. I am fine.” I can confirm we live like this

[@Illegiblescream]

'Feet got soaked, but Paul behind the camera gave me some backup socks. Thanks paul!" *wide smile, thumbs up*

[@justsomeguywhodoeswhathewa4591]

Indeed

[@igor-yp1xv]

As a reporter or as a journalist? Or both?

[@evanracer9]

I can secondly confirm this

[@freddyrosenberg9288]

It's not the "the" camera man. He said "that" camera man gave me new socks. His disconnect is 100%. LOL

[@DancingBlueMLBCatGamer]

I am autistic, and I quite like this because the comedy seems to be about us, not at our expense.

[@AppleOfThineEye]

I'm an aspie, and I think either is fine when it's a joke.

[@wako1576]

I miss the days when jokes about remotely touchy subjects could be made. Nowadays autism is treated as a sensitive, uncomfortable topic, or like it doesn't even exist at all.

[@williamgillberg3667]

I literally can’t see what’s wrong about this. Everything he says is just correct to me. Like that is indeed a helicopter and why do we spend resources looking for bodies. Obviously his cadence and way of communicating is a bit off.

[@AppleOfThineEye]

@@Mahala_Jo There's nothing wrong with it being at us. Stop making us look like a bunch of softies.

[@wako1576]

@@Mahala_Jo I think its such a fine line between being at or about a group that is too muddy for many people to figure out, and nowadays theres too much searching for a reason to be able to take something a wrong way rather than taking it a right way. No media producer wants to take that risk anymore. I do agree with the sentiment though, because there is a line there thats a problem to cross, but audiences do need to have the backbone to suffer that line being crossed so others can be brave enough to walk that line at all.

[@TyeNee]

They are frozen.

[@notthepsychicyourelookingf2369]

finally! an honest news reporter! i'd watch that guy.

[@Name-ps9fx]

And they are over there.

[@williamhicks1091]

Notthepsychic You'relookingfor Same

[@plokijum]

But we like t

[@jamesm3534]

First Last shhh

[@lzrshark617]

"They are frozen." "Well, we might-" "Shh. They are frozen."

[@sacreed1]

Helicopter

[@lachlansalter6829]

@@sacreed1 That is a helicopter.

[@jormungandrworldserpent6437]

Maintenance Renegade bruh that’s a run on sentence

[@jormungandrworldserpent6437]

Maintenance Renegade my point is I didn’t type a run on sentence, you did

[@jormungandrworldserpent6437]

Maintenance Renegade yes, I didn’t use periods _though,_ yes I didn’t capitalize, now that I’ve acknowledged my lack of punctuation and capitalization, you can acknowledge that your comment was a run on sentence, yes?

[@dyvthegamer5067]

as a person who has felt the struggle of autism all of my life and still very much am affected by it, i can confirm that is indeed a helicopter

[@ileryon4019]

Griffin helicopter

[@gustavosayto3465]

Helicopter

[@personone1382]

helicopter (wow it's actually so satisfying to say for some reason)

[@theymademepickaname1248]

@@ileryon4019 CH 146 Griffin helicopter. Helicopter!

[@Superbug-tf8zy]

Interesting, what model tho?

[@gbran919]

Waiting for Michael to report on the missing submersible.

[@timaal5897]

seriously 😂 the perfect description of this situation

[@SmartWentCrazy]

too soon

[@awake780]

@@SmartWentCrazynot even close to being too soon

[@Spencer_TheSpender]

“The submarine was reported to only have a few days worth of emergency oxygen. Is there any way the passengers could survive after they lost oxygen?” “Not that we know of.” “The passengers suffocated.” “Well-“ “Shh. The passengers suffocated.”

[@mrj4990]

THEY ARE DEAD

[@winstonchurchill624]

I’d like to think that the little pause before he says the percentages is him calculating the odds in his head

[@BlakeGibbons]

Winston Churchill That’s kinda the point

[@richardcox8409]

Rainman

[@baskey3723]

Thanks Winston Churchill

[@winstonchurchill624]

@@BlakeGibbons I mean in my defense man his general cadence in which he’s talking is very jumpy so it wasn’t super clear that was intended

[@questionmark576]

He's pausing to calculate it again, just to make sure that he calculated it correctly the first time. He wouldn't have opened his mouth if he hadn't already calculated it.

[@michwng]

I'd prefer watching him on the News because it lacks emotional sensationalism.

[@AndrooUK]

M W Dispassionate facts and critical analysis doesn't sell news to the sheeple.

[@pulsarsbeam6411]

he tells it like it is

[@Jaker788]

Gotta get them ratings though. PBS and BBC will get you the closest.

[@videogamebomer]

@tim M I only accpect Russian propaganda instead of British propaganda

[@waitthisisnotpornhub3860]

You should see him get emotional About stacking!

[@englephat]

As a dead hiker, I actually find this quite offensive

[@PaulSlowey]

As a helicopter, I enjoyed seeing one of my own being given the recognition they deserve.

[@21hairgirl]

😂🤣

[@deanmoncaster]

As one of the snowflakes on the mountains consider me Outraged

[@shosu5486]

As a mountain, I feel disgusted.

[@kungpulor1095]

as a sock i find this wet

[@sergiitk]

As a person with ADHD, I couldn't stop googling trying to confirm if this is, in fact, a CH-146 Griffon helicopter, and when I realized it's not, I needed to find which one is it. This is a Bell 407 modified for mountain rescue. Then I needed to find which is it helicopter EXACTLY. It's 1996 Bell 407 construction number 53016 registered in British Columbia, Canada with registration sign C-FALA operating as an emergency rescue at the Lake Louise Mountain Resort.

[@SnakebitSTI]

Thank you! Reading up on it, apparently the CH-146 traces its lineage back to the UH-1 Iroquois AKA Huey, while the 407's lineage goes back to the YOH-4 (same family as the OH-58 Kiowa).

[@RubenTheCartographer]

Thank you!

[@animarthur5297]

Holy shit, he just doxxed the helicopter

[@memphisdaniels3218]

Thank you so much for this! 🤩

[@armadillolover99]

As a nerd with ADHD, I feel so seen by this comment

[@Starstuff-]

That is a helicopter. A CH 146, Griffon Helicopter. Helicopter.

[@EggwithSubscribers-mz9du]

And finally..

[@EggwithSubscribers-mz9du]

Wait i forgot one

[@michaelkarim57]

@@EggwithSubscribers-mz9du Why though?

[@autumnhd]

bruh wtf did i just read in this reply section

[@rebeccak9626]

H E L I C O P T E R

[@ThatGuyYouArent2]

"Many people are looking for the hikers and saying they are alive, but that isn't possible. It is confusing." I feel you bro.

[@Knoah321]

Like Gabby Petito

[@Mutantcy1992]

In a sense, I feel it too. Remember the balloon boy whose dad had to pay some huge sum because the search cost so much? Who pays that sum when the search is for obviously dead people just so maybe there can be more specifics on how they died?

[@Mindboggles]

@@Mutantcy1992 balloon boy didn't die though, he was in the attic hiding

[@maazkalim]

He is a human calculator who merely expressed the probability of being alive, before.. You've to look beyond the numbers, after all - "@J Ygb".

[@Lawrence_Talbot]

This is how I feel every-time I see a missing persons story on the news.

[@osakanone]

I have autism. Really enjoyed this. Laughed more than probably would have been appropriate. Helicopter.

[@InstrumentalityOne]

osakanone Helicopter.

[@MsFriedchiken]

osakanone This is the top comment for every one of these videos.

[@newenglandsun4394]

I have high functioning autism as well. This is like my typical life as well. "COME ON!!!! YOU MORONS!!! IT'S RIGHT THERE!!!!"

[@hellonaughtychildrenitsdar9034]

Osaka me too I have high ADHD and Austim And i find this funny

[@JL-dance]

when will my suffering end somebody please end it ADHD and autism? Psssh, bullshit, that’s like saying positive is negative.

[@beaksofeagles]

The last few days of the Titan search I kept wishing Michael was doing the reporting.

[@goldeneagle8740]

I’m autistic and I kept telling my family “The people on the submarine are dead or about to die slowly. If they lost power then the oxygen isn’t circulating and they will run out faster. If the communication was completely cut off than there’s a huge chance it just imploded. They have already searched an area the size of Connecticut for the submersible and found nothing. There is a 1% chance that they will be found in time” then I found this video and cracked up lol. Michael Fall should have done the reporting. “Many people are saying the passengers are alive, but that is impossible. This is confusing.” Lol. Would have been more realistic.

[@beaksofeagles]

@@goldeneagle8740 Thank you for your comments. I must be autistic too, because that is what I was saying throughout the search. Oh, and yes, an eagle is a raptor, but not all raptors are eagles!! ;-)

[@Pauly421]

We are still uncertain as to the state of the crew of the Titan sub. Our field reporter Michael Falk is here live: "They are dead. Nobody could possibly have survived yet people are pretending that they could. It is confusing"

[@CL-Lynn]

Autism as a means to develop a joke instead of the punch line is the shit we need to see. Onions have nailed this character

[@gotsax0286]

"means to develop a joke" 🤌 phrasing

[@AppleOfThineEye]

Either is fine because it's humor. Of course The Onion comment section has been filled with SJWs lmao Reminder that if you have a problem with any brand of humor, it's your problem and not everyone else's.

[@Bunny2319b]

@@AppleOfThineEye true I could care less. As long as it’s funny🤷besides comedy is subjective. No need to get offended on behalf of others

[@dantecaputo2629]

@@AppleOfThineEye Yeah but a lot of it’s just lazy and repetitive. This is far funnier then most jokes I see about autism

[@AppleOfThineEye]

@@dantecaputo2629 Lol, who are you trying to fool, no one jokes about autism anymore lol

[@angelikaskoroszyn8495]

I like to believe that they always say "autistic reporter" instead of just "reporter" because in Onion universe people treat those on the spectrum with more trust and respect. It's like saying "doctor" or "specialist". You know he'll be brutally honest and this is exactly the reason why people listen to him

[@JDMimeTHEFIRST]

Ah, if only real world people treated us nicely😅

[@anthonymeade7345]

Asian reporter Trisha Takinawa.

[@progenitor_amborella]

This perspective is great. Thank you for sharing (bestowing).

[@naan000]

Damn, your perspective is way more positive. I thought they were calling him autistic reporter because that's the only thing they seem him for and want to make it his brand so they can be seen as a diverse, inclusive company

[@69happy69]

Micheal Falk for president

[@lendial]

our president is already autistic

[@ZhangtheGreat]

No, our president isn't autistic. Autistic people think logically. Our president just says whatever he thinks at any given moment. There is nothing logical about him.

[@Tierchenmeister]

The Western World in general is in dire need of less emotion, more rationality.

[@ivartheboneless2481]

+Tierchenmeister just cause a bunch of people cry like bitches doesn't mean we need less emotion. emotion needs to be directed properly there is nothing to rationalize.

[@1001011011010]

Logical thinking is needed as opposed to emotive thinking. Emotions should flow from reason.

[@NekoSauce]

Can we please have real news reporters like this. I genuinely would listen to the news and pay attention. No more emotional bs. Just starght to the point and obvious

[@musicaldramaqueen]

You know what…… 🤔

[@musicaldramaqueen]

I think you may be onto something

[@JDMimeTHEFIRST]

You can on NPR😅. Autistic people are sadly paid less for better work as well. I guess that’s why they stick us in public radio.

[@WoefulMinion]

My nephew is autistic and I'd rather listen to him, too.

[@karezaalonso7110]

Obvious, yes. Working on the starght to the point. 😉

[@trevorlambert4226]

Never gets old. This character should have had his own series.

[@Wojjjie]

He does

[@arandomzoomer4837]

Especially as an autistic dude I love these videos.

[@aurumskies6367]

@@Wojjjie where is it?

[@xraymind]

@@aurumskies6367 Here on the Onion channel on KZbin.

[@dannygjk]

@@Wojjjie The series should be longer, go on until the guy is frozen or something.

[@SirAndacar]

I have an autistic son and he finds this hilarious. I've read reviews of this series of shorts from The Onion, and the only people who were offended were autism advocates. All the people with autism themselves thought they were great and told them to lighten up.

[@LordSandwichII]

SirAndacar Well, if you can't laugh about your problems, you cry about them! And that's just miserable!

[@deannasmith4443]

most autism "advocates" that i've come across in my short life as an aspie are closet eugenicists.

[@dadude4960]

i find it very offensive when these so called advocates would strip an entire group of people from enjoying comedy that they can relate to.

[@inspectorjavert8443]

The urge to save humanity is almost always only a false-face for the urge to rule it. Power is what all messiahs really seek: not the chance to serve. This is true even of the pious brethren who carry the gospel to foreign parts.- HL Mencken

[@newenglandsun4394]

You mean they THOUGHT they were autism advocates. What this is basically showing is that Autistic people tend to be the only ones who have a clue the vast majority of times and are hoping and getting frustrated as to why nobody is catching up. Autism Speaks is the only organisation that advocates for Autism that actually understands the full potential of people who have Autism.

[@Hoobyj]

"Its not cool to make fun of autistic people." Except the brilliant thing about this video is it makes just as much fun of "normal" people for being illogical. To me its more offensive saying that a certain type of person is too fragile to be involved in humor than "making fun" of them. Humor is a part of life. That stance is dehumanizing.

[@TurboRTM]

Beautifully said. I agree with you completely but have never been able to say this as well as you did.

[@adog3129]

redacted because it's been three years and i'm still getting angry comments from bigots about once per day

[@adog3129]

redacted because it's been three years and i'm still getting angry comments from bigots about once per day

[@eadlynjune]

I know right? He was he only realistic person in this video! Guy One: Yeah, we still think they might be alive. Micheal: Frick no they dead, it’s freezing.

[@eadlynjune]

Adog312 But you don’t speak for all autistic people, right? I’m bi as flip but gay jokes, the good ones at least, have me on the floor!

[@A_real_Wizard]

"Coast Guard continues search for obviously dead submersible crew"

[@GrahamCStrouse]

😁

[@TheCrazyCloon]

😮

[@JRRob3wn]

Retired CG here. I spent easily 50% of my time searching for obviously dead people or people that were never missing in the first place. Usually these searches are done at 2am with no sleep. Exciting times.

[@A_real_Wizard]

@@JRRob3wn I wish I didn't know this, thanks anyways!

[@Liminal-Galaxy-System6819]

I’m here after the hearings 😁😁😁

[@HisCarlnessI]

I... I actually like this guy. I know this is made up, but the news would be way better given this way.

[@justinmebes476]

HisRoyalCarlness yeah but imagine if it’s your family he is reporting on. I know it’s fake and I’ve been laughing at all the comments but just imagine for a second that he is talking like that about your dead little sister or something. I know he can’t help it, but there’s obviously a reason we don’t have autistic people reporting news, because sometimes it’s not the best idea to get straight to the point.

[@gregorymuir1985]

At least he wouldn't be bullshitting me about her. "Your sister was kidnapped by a cannibal. She is most likely eaten by now." Well, at least he's giving it to me straight.

[@christobanistan8887]

@@justinmebes476 Oh fuck off, dude. He's NOT reporting on your family BECAUSE IT'S A FUCKING JOKE. You moron!

[@thuglifebear5256]

That's the joke LOL

[@hoticeparty]

@@christobanistan8887 he said *Imagine* if this was real and how fucked up that would be, your getting worked up over nothing😐

[@opedromagico]

I need a playlist with all Michael Falk videos

[@meduimrareberries5888]

Correction: THE WORLD needs a playlist with all Michael Falk videos. Also: more Michael Falk videos.

[@KingoftheJuice18]

Would you also like to stack them?

[@iknowthings3031]

@@KingoftheJuice18 I LIKE TO STACK.

[@F-Man]

Yes.

[@PsydeON]

@throng youre awesome

[@Ken_Scaletta]

I have an autistic daughter, The "they are frozen" part is dead on. They are going to tell you exactly what they think at all times. They don't have any malice in it. They are just completely honest and don't really understand the concept of "white lies."

[@JLConawayII]

Tact is overrated.

[@thereisnosanctuary6184]

Tacts don't care about your feelings.

[@palepilgrim1174]

Tact is for disingenuous worms. Honestly, bluntness is actually the norm in many countries in eastern and northern Europe. The English-speaking world just assumes its way is the norm, it isn't.

[@thedudeamongmengs2051]

@@thereisnosanctuary6184 I love your pun and appreciate you greatly

[@sexypigeonlover4631]

i am autistic! this is totally accurate. i got in trouble once for, when somebody said that their snake died of a respiratory infection, they said there is nothing they can do about it. i said no, the infection usually is harmless if they are taken to a vet and there has to be something wrong such as too much humidity for them to develop it. you killed the snake. i dont understand why i cant be honest. people call it tact but i call it lying. one time i accidentally crushed a baby reptile's head, and my mum said stuff like "you didn't kill her!" when i was crying, but that is untrue. i dont understand why lying to someone makes them feel better, and why if you lie about some things its bad and other things its good! people make no god damn sense! another time someone got angry at me for saying cats are an invasive species, another time someone got angry at me for calling a bulldog an inbred and saying it is snuffling, which it was.

[@vukilelanga]

The algorithm’s timing is always just perfect…

[@batacumba]

The algorithm knew exactly what it was doing 😂

[@pixelice6206]

YT just knew

[@Nympho4Hire]

They are squished.

[@Liminal-Galaxy-System6819]

I got this after watching the hearings 😂🤣

[@itsgaylebitxh]

They are frozen. Helicopter. I wish people were this honest sometimes.

[@cold_static]

They are, when they are autistic. Helicopter.

[@scottvelez3154]

*H E L I C O P T E R*

[@ileryon4019]

A CH-146 griffon helicopter

[@TheRafaelBond]

Its not honesty

[@thomastruant8837]

That's just being tired of people's denial and lies about how much they care us autistic people don't want to go through all the pointless bs like pretending to only want one of something or laws regarding the use of explosives in a residential area, what I'm trying to say is helicopter

[@markjones6358]

I honestly don't understand why these "obviously dead people" can't or won't just turn themselves into the authorities and stop PISSING away these precious resources, like the helicopter. The helicopter... Oh look, the helicopter!

[@drabberfrog]

H E L I C O P T E R

[@monkeybluecheese]

If only all humor that has to do with autism was this respectful...

[@PTMG]

I think he might actually be autistic and it's probably his joke too he's probably exaggerating it a bit, but he understands what to exaggerate and how to exaggerate it

[@PTMG]

Now I just feel dumb lmfao I just googled him and he's not even autistic lol

[@57thorns]

@@PTMG He did a good job and fooled you. Don't feel bad about feeling stupid, feeling stupid is generally associated with having an insight or learnings something new.

[@ecpgieicg]

@@57thorns wow that escalated quickly. but yes

[@quickstep2408]

@@57thorns everyone's an idiot. that means you don't know something. no one knows everything so everyone is an idiot, impossible not to be.

[@felicityc]

Having an autistic brother and doing a lot of research and time spent into studying autism, I was really expecting to be offended by this video. But wow, it really surprised me. I laughed a lot. He was portrayed as smarter and more realistic than everyone else. It was fantastic.

[@js2010ish]

:)

[@Gambit771]

Not smarter, just repeating facts he had just read to people that already knew them.

[@toragic3432]

Imagine clicking on a video fully expecting that you'll get offended. Its like looking at a dog shit and choosing to step over it.

[@ashb7]

@@toragic3432 They worded it a bit weirdly, but it makes sense that someone would expect this to have an inaccurate and offensive portrayal of autism. It's super common in movies and TV to just half-ass what mental/developmental disabilities are actually like, especially in comedic settings. And I disagree that if you expect something to be offensive, you shouldn't interact with it. If turned out to actually be a good portrayal (like it did), how would they have known? If it wasn't, they could've provided constructive criticism to what the video got wrong. Pretending the thing you expect to be shitty doesn't exist doesn't seem like a good solution.

[@three7446]

I wouldn’t say someone is smarter just because they do math without a calculator lol. I mean emotional intelligence and social intelligence are things and you can’t really be smarter than others when you lack that

[@Conundroy]

"21 degrees" Celsius people: hey that's not so bad

[@moth5799]

21 degrees is nice

[@josephdugdale4150]

"Celsius people" or more commonly known as the entire planet minus the US

[@moth5799]

Yeah, the US just wants to be different so they stick to the stupid imperial system.

[@afterlife697]

randomcat And that’s exactly the kind of comment that people write with their not a member of the greatest nation in the world USA USA USA USA USA USA 🇺🇸

[@MR__JUSTIN]

@@afterlife697 they're* Another genius American who only reads / writes one language and can't even get that right 🙄😂

[@Velvetspoonful]

" They're frozen. - Well we like to- - SSSHHH. They're frozen. "

[@notthepsychicyourelookingf2369]

clearly!

[@clvrblzzrd8333]

i see way more people critiquing people for saying it’s offensive than people saying it’s offensive

[@zad_rasera]

@@lowercasesolar9019 I have autism and I talk like Falk (most of the time).

[@midgetman4206]

@@zad_rasera helicopter?

[@renegadeprism42]

@@zad_rasera who cares

[@Drogado68]

@@zad_rasera nice

[@MarshallTheArtist]

I see neither.

[@bigedslobotomy]

I heard of a guy (in Montana, I think) that got lost in the wilderness with his family just before a big storm. After the storm, they sent out search crews to find what they supposed would be the frozen bodies, but found them with the stuck vehicle, sitting around a fire in good condition. The man had mad survival skills, and they were burning tires to keep warm, and he had caught some animals for his family to eat (along with the supplies he already had in his truck for such a situation).

[@nadiag366]

Husband material ♥️

[@UCannotDefeatMyShmeat]

Lucky for them

[@Dubyahh]

That would be such a good card to pull in any argument with your wife

[@K1lostream]

Link or it didn't happen. They are frozen.

[@c.f.bellairs1055]

@@K1lostream Are you under the impression there's never been anyone who survived in the wilderness by hunting food and building a fire? It's really not that wild a claim for you to be demanding citation.

[@otomicans6580]

One definition of humor is to poke fun at people's vices. In this case, the Onion is poking fun at our unwillingness to accept death and the inability of autistic people to understand social norms. I don't think this video is dehumanizing at all because we clearly aren't intended to think of anyone as less than a human. If we can't talk about our vices or pretend that we don't have any then it just makes things worse.

[@arandomzoomer4837]

Also I have autism and I love how they’re making fun of us because I can actually relate to the humor.

[@selfloathinggivesmelife7810]

Damn, well put. I didn't even think about it like that. Like, both parties know that it's highly unlikely that the hikers are alive. It's just that one side is in denial, while the other is way too blunt.

[@carolineh8605]

That is very un-woke of you.

[@TimeTravelingFetus]

CAANCELLL HIIMMMMM

[@janetownley]

RAnDOM MAGA tROpe

[@HungryTacoBoy]

As a CH-146 Griffon helicopter myself, I find this to be an honest and accurate portrayal of us. Really enjoyed this. The only people who are offended are CH-146 Griffon helicopter advocates.

[@SarahMcCulloch]

Helicopter.

[@-Cheif]

I am sorry to say but you must be going through an identity crisis, because that’s not a CH-146 Griffon helicopter

[@HungryTacoBoy]

@@-Cheif I am one confused helicopter, then. :(

[@grillygrilly]

Griffon Peter Griffin.

[@falcomaksim3320]

As a Boeing AH-64 Apache helicopter, i get sad when people call me a attack helicopter, i dont attack unless attacked upon, im actually very friendly but people think i will attack them because of my huge M230 autocannon

[@awdrifter3394]

They need to have Michael Falk to report on the Titanic submarine.

[@brandonvillamizar1216]

It's strange but when they first announced that the sub was lost I said the same: They are dead.

[@roningaming716]

"There is no chance they will live, why are we talking about this?"

[@roningaming716]

​@@brandonvillamizar1216💀

[@ZessXXify]

Literally James Cameron’s interview about the Titanic sub

[@Deadjuice360]

Had no idea this was going to be a Micheal Falk video, awesome!

[@stephen3187]

Wait there’s more?!

[@arndnaj]

Same here. Yes, there are maybe five or six more. One bit in prison, one at a funeral, one of a train accident, and I can't remember if there were more. I think there was at least one more.

[@Ifyoucanreadthisgooglebroke]

I love these onion pieces where they let a sensible person present the facts. He puts up with a lot of neurotyoical nonsense that attempts to cloud the issues but still presents the facts successfully. He is an effective reporter. I just wish they hadn't edited out most of his presentation of the helicopter.

[@Bahtou1]

Michael falk is the reporter we need but dont deserve

[@ImNotaRussianBot]

I want Michael Falk for every news piece. Nothing but stark truth.

[@sidhu139]

Bahtou Or the reporter we need but don't want.

[@Jack1994hoo]

He is the one we deserve, but we don't need

[@Derek_Wyld]

@@Jack1994hoo we don't deserve michael falk

[@egrffin8534]

I can relate to this, when i came back from a month long family trip throughout the outback my 6 year old son with Autism called out for me 'mum, mum look at me' i found him him laying behind my parked car entwined in his bicycle in a distorted position and he said to me ' look mum i'm road kill.' On our trip we had seen many kangaroo's and emu's dead on the road. I found it both horrifying and funny. At least he learnt something.!

[@definitelynotwalter]

Helicopter

[@Oscar4u69]

@@definitelynotwalter HELIKOPTER HELIKOPTER 🎶🎶

[@Oscar4u69]

relatable

[@Blox117]

he learned how great your wheelchair driving skills are

[@rum-ham]

🤣 Your son is hilarious

[@smurfyday]

Oh, come on. 5 years later and we still don't know what happened to the hikers!

[@thelessimportantajmichel287]

smurfyday They’re dead. Dead.

[@carolynmmitchell2240]

thelessimportantAJ michel no they found a dimensional door and went to the land of lardia

[@pooppant-iq1nc]

@@carolynmmitchell2240 They found a door that took them to some made-up place called 'The Middle East'. How can something be eastern, but still in the middle? Exactly. It was all a cover for 9/11.

[@aviationjosh1472]

6 years later*

[@watermelonhead8054]

they're obviously dead.

[@JeffSichoe]

It's refreshing to see a reporter with such passion for the truth.

[@-Cheif]

1:19 sorry to say but that is not a CH146 Griffon Helicopter

[@willchurch8376]

If only this brave man was here to report on a certain submersible.

[@stripes8812]

This dude would be a legit awesome newscaster. He's super knowledgable and spits facts.

[@eckee]

0:56 I lost it at dude’s “right”

[@ph4seYT]

IamMichealFalkreportingonMichealFalkgoodbye.

[@drabberfrog]

Next time buy a keyboard with a working space bar lol

[@nvcbl]

@@drabberfrog uhh he spelt it like that to signify that he's talking fast

[@rah.248]

As someone who is autistic, I am still autistic.

[@joostdriesens3984]

Ok, now it's two years later. Are you still autistic?

[@jbarnes8]

Checking in from 2024? Autism still going strong?

[@theonlytnargmatt]

​@@jbarnes8 can confirm, autism's never been better for me and I assume OP as well

[@lawlicht8092]

He gives nothing but hard and cold truth about the missing hikers.

[@arandomzoomer4837]

I have it and I can admit we can be a bit blunt at times. We’re not robots or anything, we just don’t understand how other people view what we say. I found that part to be hella funny because I could relate a lot.

[@zigzag1906]

its fitting because the hikers would also be hard and cold

[@diamondcreeper28]

Micheal is such a sweetheart

[@Regu269]

I just assumed this video was about the submarine before seeing the date it was released

[@colleenglanville8293]

*"Is There Shelter In The Forest For The Hikers?"* "Not That We Know Of." *"They're Frozen."* I laughed so hard lol! 😂😂😂 Talk about blunt, but it's probably true lol! 😂😂😂

[@zachrichard7039]

"shhhh" *they are frozen*

[@colleenglanville8293]

@@zachrichard7039 This is probably the funniest part of the entire video lol. Oh my god! 😂😂😂

[@JBB685]

Masterclass in logical arguments 😂

[@colleenglanville8293]

@@JBB685 Yeah, pretty much lol! 😂😂😂

[@fun_nuggets2514]

Oh my god please stop using emojis d

[@BumbleBeeKit]

Brilliant! I love how he plays the Michael Falk character so perfectly and doesn't do it in such a way that is offensive to people with Autism. Instead it shows a little of their quirks which add up to some incredible people. He does it in such a lovely and funny way that just makes you adore the character. A few of my family members are autistic and I can see a little bit of each of them in Michael Falk.

[@Andriale]

@Angel Cat huh?

[@mattlester326]

My favorite part of this character is how no one reacts, everyone plays it perfectly straight exactly how it would go down in real life. A lesser satire would hang a lantern and crack a direct joke from the "straight man" but instead eveyone just react like completely normal people: avoiding saying anything and attempting to say what they were trying to say initially.

[@skycaptain95]

He doesn't just know where the hikers are by logic alone. This is a cry for help. He is trying to confess his crimes and go to prison so he can stack crates, one on top of the other, one on top of the other.

[@marymccann3500]

The funny thing is that Michael is the most logical person here despite being a walking caricature (and I say it with love).

[@thememester1190]

I love how he just confidently says that the hikers are frozen.

[@c4manke]

I'm crying laughing so hard, he may not be "normal" (whatever that means) but he makes the most sense. I need more Michael Falk in my life.

[@JLConawayII]

Normal is boring.

[@localCrows]

I'm autistic and can confirm, we are indeed normal. Just not neurotypical.

[@senororlando2]

We needed Michael Falk for the Titan submarine

[@makismakiavelis5718]

Oh, yes! Exactly what i was thinking. I have a dream, that someday news programs will last no more than 10 minutes. Just a person, stating sterile facts, without sensational toppings that twist and distort the truth by turning the simple task of providing the people with the news, into a fucking circus.

[@IrrelevantPlease]

Well said.

[@MastaSmack]

@@IrrelevantPlease Hikers dead, Search for bodies continue, Authorities too nice to let familes know their loved ones are dead and hope they eventually leave them alone.

[@seanhartnett79]

MastaSmack lol.

[@InfamousMax]

@@MastaSmack Also: Helicopter!

[@arthurcatrambone1982]

How timely that this shows up now lol

[@johncampbell9448]

I like this guy. Straight to the point, accurate data, and he just says what all of us are thinking.

[@tomahawk6464]

As someone who got diagnosed with autism a few years ago, helicopter. Helicopter indeed.

[@pgshrestha]

very peculiar timing , the algorthm is going to hell as well💀

[@latteknowsbest6365]

LMAOOO

[@holdenackerman8783]

What it feels like watching the news June 21 2023

[@imogeno4686]

I love that the cameramen carry spare socks for him, talk about workplace accommodations!

[@SensationalBanana]

I have autism and whilst I am not THIS lacking, I have been known to blurt out facts with no regard for the finer social cues, or being extremely factual when teachers wanted "a personal touch" to a work and such crap... Michael Falk is my spirit animal.

[@aultmanfilms4590]

This feels very relevant now

[@warewolf435]

"The hikers are frozen.." "No we..-" "Shh! The hikers are frozen" That... That has made my whole damn day =D

[@Kriosaivak]

It’s a shame we only got one or two episodes with Michael, such a hilarious character.

[@bjam89]

Jail, this one, train, the one where they take a jab at the us army and funeral are the ones i have seen so we had Atleast fiveclips

[@somerandomguy4240]

There's 6 clips with, as far as I know.

[@caronstout354]

True story...a local newscaster started the local news with "A local man remains dead at this hour..."

[@siddhantgarud6070]

Man watching this after the titan submersible debacle, where news channels were reporting on how there is a chance the people might be alive. Always can count on American news to be the same lol

[@Jerry-yd8pj]

Pfft. Is news really news if it isn't the truth?

[@mylobage]

“I know where they are, there over there” lmfao

[@fatihkan2601]

He deserves a whole movie. I can't imagine how entertaining it can be.

[@DivergentMoon]

Nah. Half the humor is in the comments.

[@fatihkan2601]

@@DivergentMoon comments can be included in the movie. Don't worry.

[@danebirbhaha7520]

Absolutely perfect for the current submarine news

[@paulteichelman7284]

That was absolutely phenomenal reporting, Michael! Brilliant work.

[@sammehlberg6664]

"Even though I found the dead hikers they continue to look for the bodies" Story of my life

[@cassandrabelyeu2419]

As an autist, I thought this might be offensive. But...it's so perfect! This is exactly how we would handle much of the news made by allistic people-after the weather has cleared you can look for bodies for burial-but they're buried in the snow. Right there! No human being, autistic or allistic, is a wholly rational entity. But sometimes allistic thought patterns are funny-I loved that this video showed them!

[@Jake-bt3fc]

I'm on the spectrum and this was exactly what I was thinking when they were searching for my friends bodies in the freezing rain. The way they were constantly talking about finding them alive when they obviously weren't was honestly kind of insulting.

[@cassandrabelyeu2419]

@@Jake-bt3fc What happened to your friends? I’ve had that moment, too. “Maybe he’ll get better.” He was dying. There was no logical or medical way that he would not die. Then he died.

[@cassandrabelyeu2419]

@The Smoking Salmon Where did someone say “others” on this thread? The less normal you are, the more people could be called “other” if someone did…

[@UserOfTheName]

@The Smoking Salmon The fuck is wrong with you

[@archkull]

@@cassandrabelyeu2419 are you okay? You do realize to autistic people we are literally the others right. Don't have a shit fit over wording like a child.

[@BigMacOrange]

The algorithm has a dark AF sense of humor WTF 😂.

[@rocbolt]

More like, people remember this, find it relevant, and rewatch it and share it. The mystical algorithm is just recommending something that is already getting increased watch time

[@BigMacOrange]

@@rocbolt ☝️🤓 ACTUALLY!!!!

[@spencerjames9417]

@@rocboltbased comment

[@spencerjames9417]

@@BigMacOrangeactually, you people are the reason everything online sucks because you think the algorithm is some amorphous entity

[@yummico]

This is how I felt when they said there was a rescue mission for those billionaires. I'm like why, they'll be dead by now and you technically can't save them. I felt bad, but I knew I was right.

[@vangroover1903]

No need to feel bad, they died doing what they loved, assuming they loved being torn to shreds by a catastrophic implosion.

[@vj7248]

Love Him or Hate Him, He Spittin Facts

[@TrinityCourtStudios]

***people in titanic aluminum exploration can die The Onion and KZbin’s algorithms: “So there’s these obviously dead hitchhikers…..”

[@pugachevskobra5636]

Oh my God the OceanGate submarine lmfao. That’s eerie as fuck.

[@thezeronelite]

If I may say so, I have Autism, and find this not offensive, but hilarious and accurate. Strangely insightful as well. Those who are hating on this video are not usually autistics, but autism advocates. If you are one of them, I ask you to let those with Autism decide whether this is offensive, rather than yourself. I have scoured the comments section thoroughly and not found one person who is offended and stated that they are Autistic. To conclude, to those who do not have Autism and judge this video (and others related) as rude and offensive, I ask you not to defend those who do not feel they are being attacked. Thanks for taking the time to read this, have a good day.

[@mattcunningham9235]

Why does everyone who has a condition that they are making fun of have to give their seal of approval?

[@theuncalledfor]

@@mattcunningham9235 Because it is disgusting to make fun of people for things they have no control over, especially if it's something that can also cause them to suffer without others adding insult to injury. Disabilities, physical "defects", poverty (that's not the individual's own fault), are things you simply do not make fun of. _That_ is why this here type of humor "needs" the "seal of approval" of people who are affected by the thing in question. It shows that the humor isn't "adding insult to injury" (or being just plain insulting regardless of whether or not there even is any "injury" to begin with).

[@mattcunningham9235]

@@theuncalledfor this is the onion. And youtube. If you have a problem with something the onion did take it up with then

[@theuncalledfor]

@@mattcunningham9235 How about you actually read the post I made, and recheck the context of the thread? You've either forgotten what this is about, or you're _a freaking alien with no human-comprehensible thought process._

[@mattcunningham9235]

@@theuncalledfor I was responding to the aspect of your comment that is berating the content of the show idiot. The weird response from people like "i give this my seal of approval" is just silly and unnecessary.

[@FloatingParadice]

He’s on the seen with the missing Titan submarine

[@TylerBaraby]

scene*...

[@killherqueen]

seen*...

[@vangroover1903]

That must have been quite a scene he done seen, der, ferschur

[@Exclema]

That last dude was not even interviewed Mr.Falk just asked himself the questions and answered all of them

[@isaacdaniel1506]

This in 2012: Me in 2023 seeing the same situation:

[@beanieweenie1349]

I love how he doesn't actually ask questions, he just states things

[@ejbabc]

I actually love people like this. Everyone is faffing around going, it might be this, it might be that. Meanwhile, someone cuts through with, "They are frozen. Shhhh!" 😂 I mean, it's harsh, but it's likely the truth. It just saves a lot of time wasting and cuts to the chase. Saves a lot of grief from prolonging it, imho. Kudos!

[@djtoolhead]

They are frozen. Shhhh!

[@Deltarious]

Because of who the reporter is I can't let the mistake slide: He says it's a "CH-146 Griffon helicopter" which is the Canadian designation for a variant of the Bell 412EP that they use for, among other things, search and rescue. That is not the helicopter in the video. It's actually a Bell 407 of some description- it's too round nosed to be a 427 I think. The number on the belly is too obscured otherwise I'd be able to find the specific chopper...actually I spent an extra 15 mins checking and this is C-FALA belonging to "Alpine Helicopters" and it's equipped for mountain rescue as well as helicopter tours

[@CrypticCobra]

this describes how I feel exactly when I watch a rescue mission that is literally still going on 1 week+ after the incident. Like if the person really did get pinned down under that rubble, pretending they did not get mortally injured, and have air to breath, they have all died from dehydration anyway. It's CLEARLY just a search for the bodies so we can confirm them dead, but they lie and say they are holding out hope for survivors. They are not idiots, they know they are looking for corpses.