Self-Inflicted Achromatic english ver. 【Oktavia】自傷無色【英語で歌ってみた】

[@Trickle_Official]

You have NO IDEA how long I have wanted to hear you sing this and I have to say, it was well worth the wait!! Such a stunning performance and beautiful rawness to the whole thing... Feels like the golden days of Vocaloid. So personal and important. Thank you for your hard work!

[@mosskii6832]

Babe wake up new oktavia song dropped!!

[@malthemalevolentone]

this is my favorite vocaloid song and you’re my favorite vocaloid cover artist , it feels like a blessing that you covered this . and to top it all off , your voice is beautiful singing this .

[@bluerasberri]

I love your music Oktavia. It’s kept me alive to this very day. I feel like it’s a way for me to cope and realize that even if I don’t want to live I have to go on because there has to be light at the end of my tunnel. Thank you so much.

[@hank-g3e]

I am overjoyed whenever I get to hear another cover from you. Please do take your time and work at a pace healthy for you! The wait for these covers, no matter how long they may be, are always worth it!! This one is no exception!!!

[@petrifiedsuezo4202]

You know what's funny KZbin put a discretion on hated by life and not this

[@jexim_kymaria]

damn i should've got here sooner, your voice is too good!

[@Levonshi]

HOW IS THIS SO PERFECT I'M LITERALLY GOING TO EXPLODE FROM ADORATION!?!??!!!! YOUR VOICE- I CAN'T EVEN PUT IT INTO WORDS OH MY GOODNESS!!!!!!!! SO GOOD?!!!!!! SO EPIC... I HAVE NO WORDS LEFT TO DESCRIBE HOW GOOD THIS COVER IS AND YOUR VOICE!!!!????!!!!!

[@Levonshi]

THAT HIGH NOTE!

[@Levonshi]

This is peak...

[@Levonshi]

So good 😭😭😭

[@Levonshi]

I love this cover with all my heart 😭💖

[@vennisan7268]

Omg a debut or die pfp

[@ariseri]

i love this song its my favorite

[@FainthedCherry]

OH MY GOD THANK YOU SO SO MUCH FINALLY A DIFFERENT COVER THAT ISN'T JUBY'S THAT'S JUST AS GOOD!!!!

[@furiousgarfer4991]

Banger

[@MonsieurALG]

I don't have a witty or fangirly comment this time around, but I just want you to know that I love the fact all your songs take me back to a good time in life. It's a real blessing you've bestowed upon me, and for that I thank you.

[@Cloudydollz]

This song is so real

[@broncored]

AHSHJSJHSJHSJS YES I LOVE THIS

[@hermitmizuki]

yk i came from prsk but the songs better than ever-

[@junibeeb]

y’all remember when this song was literally everywhere too. like 2014 it was being covered with utau’s of the hetalia voice actors to make angsty hetalia AMVs. that’s how i found both this song and hetalia… dark times

[@bcunningham3718]

I wasn’t around for that time so no, but I can tell you something wonderful, I’ve never heard of heard of hetalia so now I have something to go explore. Want to send a link to your favorite vid of theirs? Edit: Ignore me, I just looked it up and hetalia is an anime series, thought it was like a KZbin genre

[@spiritofchaos58]

Oh that's so cool of the VA. Talk about knowing your audience

[@junibeeb]

@@bcunningham3718 if you mean oktavia’s covers you’re welcome to! ive seen all her videos tho but id love to hear something i might not have heard in a while ^^ also omg… i feel so old,,,, im only 19 😭 but please don’t watch hetalia it’s very dated and of it’s time, like a lot of the anime from the 2000’s to early 2010’s is.

[@junibeeb]

@@spiritofchaos58 the VAs didn’t make the UTAU voicebank or provide any voice of any of the characters, fans made the voicebanks! not sure how they did it, buts it’s like when you see spongebob covers of vocaloid songs. my bad, it wasn’t clear when i typed it out

[@ranpo_edogawa]

You know this song is a really close comfort song for me. So scrolling down and seeing a comment about hetalia was a one shot k.o. My past will haunt me where ever i go.

[@BreadBoxVideo]

Your vibrato on the high F sharps in the chorus is really delicate. I think you did a good job with the expression, well done.

[@flaiirenn]

do you have perfect pitch too by any chance?

[@Primanovas]

Wonderful cover! And about the description, we understand if you cannot be as active as you once were. Please don’t overwork yourself when making videos, allow yourself breaks as needed. Once again, very emotional and beautiful cover! :)

[@thechaosofcaffeine]

achromatic does mean "without color", but it has another definition: being able to refract light without breaking it up into its component colors (

[@rosielloll]

This is unironically one of my favourite songs for some reason, and my favourite version was jury's ver. Not only am I happy to see you post, it's this song, and her lyrics! Girl you astound me

[@foxitp]

yeah, juby's is good, but this one freaking slaps like nothing else. i will fight anyone who dares to say otherwise.

[@mihiromiki-maestbritishsid5978]

I'm sorry in Japanese (> _

[@rachaelgreen1812]

This one's better. It feels more... Real

[@kelenthusiast3286]

@@rachaelgreen1812 100% agree

[@ThirdyMeowy]

while i don't get suicidal thoughts/don't act on any of my negative thoughts, ive recently been thinking things wouldn't change with me out of the picture. i don't want to be dead, but. i want a different life.

[@ThirdyMeowy]

update. im doing better. i hope everyone here stays safe.

[@brotherkhrayn3525]

@@ThirdyMeowythat’s good your doing better!

[@SoldierFromTF2]

How you doing now mate?

[@ThirdyMeowy]

​@@SoldierFromTF2 im good. been up and down but finally better again.

[@SoldierFromTF2]

@@ThirdyMeowy aye that's good to hear

[@azrieldreamer]

Didn't expect a new Octavia cover. This is absolutely amazing! I really love your voice! Sounds like your voice improved and is even more amazing than it was before which I thought was impossible

[@justastraylesbian5817]

As always, this is so impressive. The technique you display is really something to listen to. Your vibrato during the chorus is gorgeous!!!!!

[@dot-rain]

Fun fact! The MADE IN 他人 part is not meant to be proper English, it's referencing a slightly dubiously translated title for the game WarioWare DIY (translated as MADE IN 俺). In the lyrics, ore (I, myself, oneself) is swapped with tanin (other people), approximately making DIY (but not like in the normal sense, but other people making it instead). So the line means something like 'the self that other people made for me will (inevitably) crumble away'. And the relatively recent (at the time) pop culture reference could be interpreted as being there to make the character seem young.

[@spacedoughnuttt]

FINALLY AN ENGLISH COVER OF THE SONG IN THE ORIGINAL KEY YAY

[@fanfiction_reader]

Lyrics - I wanna be like you, I wanna say that I can I wanna be the person that you think that I am But even if I had it all come true like a dream, Is the person I came to be the really "real" me? So young and simple, wishing like things would come true Now as I am, I understand its best I die, And soon Just by living I'm hurting them another day Hundreds cry, all I do is ruin everything Nobody wanted me, no one there to need... "If only I could live in that kind of world", I dreamed Just by leaving I'm helping them another day Hundreds smile, all they do is laugh at everything Nobody there to scream No more being mean... but see, Things like that would never happen for me Day after day, I found my way sleepwalking through Like this, I'll fade without a trace Its for the best I do Just by living I'm nothing for another day Hundred lives, never knowing me or anything Nobody wanted me, No one there to need... Why would I wanna live in the kind of world I see? Just by leaving, I'm no one for another day. Hundred lives, never changing them or anything. Nobody there to scream, no more being mean to me ...Then could I have it all back in one piece? In the end, we'll fall to the ground again Over And over And never get up In the end, the person they made in me Breaking And breaking And never pick up In the end, we're leaving it all again Over And over And never wake up Just by living I'm bringing you another day Why, just for me, can you smile after everything? In the end, The smile you gave to me right when I wanted to give it all up And I really do wish that I didn't And all of the moments I tried just to die said goodbye Just by leaving I'm no one for another day Hundred lives, never changing them or anything Somebody, here to scream, Somebody is stopping me. ...Why can't I laugh it off the way that I dreamed...?

[@CountyHD]

This is quite an old song but really strong and meaningful. Ontop of that the vocals to this sound passionate

[@SaberToothPortilla]

Damn, it really shows that you weren't willing to let it go until you felt like it was all the way there. The tuning in the chorus is like *way* too good. Glad to see you're back, and take your time if you're going to keep putting out stuff like this!

[@HugoHK_OuO]

00:54 "Now as I am,I understand it''s best i die and soon" 01:05 "Nobody wanted me,no one there to need" #CanRelate

[@gracegrrl007]

This is absolutely GORGEOUS??? I love Juby's lyrics, and you did such a beautiful job with the singing. The emotion in that last chorus where you suddenly get stronger is so raw and real, it really feels like we get a piece of your soul in every cover you make haha Please take care of yourself and know we're happy to wait for anything you put out!

[@mscwhim1412]

Oh how I've missed your singing. Your voice has watered my crops and cleared up my skin. Thank you for this beautiful cover

[@mori5481]

Hey oktavia, I know you've been through tough times but I wanted you to know that your covers are great and I'm proud of you for doing something you like despite everything that you went through. Have a good day.

[@fen4ri]

Oktavia invented singing... wow WHAT THE FUCK those high notes were like super awesome

[@amaretta8816]

... what my fingers subconsciously moving to the proseka chart? I have no idea what your talking about....

[@Random_Stuff_102]

Bro same

[@brambleberryproductions1235]

There's nothing wrong with not posting as often! I'd rather have one or two covers a month than one a day if those one or two are covers you're proud of! Now, to rant. I'm traumatized and tend to believe I'm the absolute worst, that I hurt the people around me. This song is one I'd never actually heard before now, and...it hit the nail on the head, so to speak. It...hit home. It hurt and I'm glad it exists.

[@junibeeb]

omg YEAAAAA this 12 y/o me’s favorite song and now it’s being covered by my favorite utaite 🥺

[@honeycomb_aster]

Wow, this is simply amazing. This song has been one of my favorites for a long time and has helped me through some very difficult times in my life. Thank you so much for covering it! Also don't worry, we understand that you can't be as active as before. We'll still support you no matter what! Your covers have always been some of the highlights of my days, thank you for making my day once more.

[@dominicgunther9072]

This is the first time I'm commenting on one of your covers, so it's kind of embarrassing. I want to thank you for all this beautiful songs you post here on your channel. Every time I hear your singing I'm getting so sad and start crying and venting (but not in a bad way. It's helping me a lot). I follow you since 2017 and find since then a reason to keep going, keep living. So.... thank you Oktavia... for all your hard work.

[@moonlightnymph7975]

fuck I’m hurting so damn bad rn man why does this have me straight up sobbing. this is absolutely beautifully done

[@Wolflilygirlyt]

Everyday I always ask my self "why can't I do anything right? Do I deserve to live? Do I have to keep hiding my emotions? Do I ruin everything? Would my family, friends, and bullys care if I died today or soon?" Because I dislike myself. No one cares about me. I'm disliked every where at school.

[@Wolflilygirlyt]

Now as I am. I understand it's best I die and soon. Just by living I'm hurting them another day hundreds cry all I do is ruin everything! Nobody wanted me no one there to need. ...if only I could live in the kind of world I dreamed. Just by leaving I'm helping them another day hundreds smile all they do is laugh at everything! Nobody there to scream nobody being mean but see things like that would never happened for me.

[@DontMindAnythingFromThisAcc]

Same, I do too. Except for me, I'm not asking myself, I'm telling myself. Like I say to myself "we can't do anything right, we don't deserve to live, I don't want to have to keep hiding our emotions all the time, we ruin everything, our 'family', 'friends', or anyone else, they don't care about us, we're hated by everyone, especially at school"

[@Wolflilygirlyt]

@@DontMindAnythingFromThisAcc hi friend. :D

[@DontMindAnythingFromThisAcc]

@@Wolflilygirlyt Hiiii :)))

[@freegameryt09925]

Those thoughts seem terrifyingly real sometimes, don't they? Maybe they are real. But we most likely will never get a proper answer. Living with these thoughts isn't easy. It is anything but. I'm saying this as a person who experiences these ruminations day after day. Life is miserable, for sure. But I'm still battling for survival. And I hope you two and anyone else reading this can continue to fight as well. You guys have done well to get where you are. Please continue. Never give up

[@marenking1849]

As someone struggling with depression, this song hits me so hard. I have that person who would scream if I leaved, she smiles at me, and it makes my heart flutter. I wish I could get rid of these thoughts for her, but at the very least I know while I have her i'll still be here

[@aurae_rori]

Chills. Literal chills. I used to listen to this song every day when I was at an incredibly low point in my life. The chorus, I literally had to sit down because of the emotion of it. There's tingles all over my body. Excellent cover.

[@RTDelete]

It's crazy how much your voice has improved, the emotion and clarity, all of it

[@vantom253]

Let's fucking gooooooo

[@bunnybun1440]

your voice is gorgeous, i adore your singing techniques sm the chorus made me feel like i was starting to ascend

[@outeremissary4438]

God, this is such a gorgeous cover of one of my old favorites. Now I can return to my roots and add Self-Inflicted Achromatic to all my playlists, thank you

[@bafritts9595]

Those high notes are just impeccable

[@Maple_Donut]

1 year ago?! I remember this when it first came out…

[@___.______.______.______._____]

I still violently sob to this cover 😘🥰🤞🩷

[@spiriox]

OH MY GOD I remember one of my ex-friends ( I left them for personal reasons ) showed me this song Good memories

[@haybug1000]

I'm sorry for watching this and then forgetting make a comment but, I have an AMAZING REASON! So my husband has an eclectic range of bands form Stevie Ray Vaugh to Hed Pe, Crazy Town, Sizzla Kalonji, Skynd, Saints Asonia, The Rasmus, Rammstein, and even Babymetal. I wanted to show him one of your songs and originally was going to do Rolling Girl....then I saw you covered this. This song means a lot to me since I've been there so I played the cover on the tv. Now are the compliments~ I didn't care WHAT the lyrics would be because I know your voice, it only gives the words power and emotion, any translation would have been perfect. But you picked Juby's lyrics, the exact ones I know. I sang along a bit but still get tripped up at "In the end..." He enjoyed this song and could also relate to it in ways. So once again you have done an amazing ass job! Take it easy, genius is better when mind and body are happy and at peace. SO until then I the college student mama-to-be say....take care of yourself first then attend to the music. You are more important than a new video so please pamper yourself and relax.

[@anikanamisu2456]

Hey Oktavia, thanks for making this. You're one of favorite artists, and recently this song has become more relevant for me. When I looked up this song for some covers, and saw yours, I was so happy!

[@foxitp]

Freak, jubyphonic's is good, BUT LITERALLY NOTHING SLAPS AS HARD AS OKTAVIA'S VERSION. Me and my sister started just balling together.

[@ボフォイ]

声が綺麗すぎる

[@brbrhello]

oh my goodness OKTAVIA IS THS AMAZINGGG!!! please take the time to take care of yourself, i saw the twitter poll of either to continue mixing or go to sleep, make sure to take care of your health first and foremost please! thank you for this cover, it's absolutely wonderful! your voice takes me to another world i s2g

[@stormoftara]

I love this song personally. I feel like its one of those songs I always go back to. Or it seems to find me, lol. I'm glad I can listen to your cover of it too! Thank you!

[@IrohaNijiueHat]

The fact I relate the entire song kinda scare me. But beside that, your voice is really amazing.

[@hollyberry0602]

How am I subscribed and only NOW finding this cover??? (Damn you KZbin) Your voice is phenomenal and this song always hits me pretty deep, what a combo! 💜

[@hatchet_fish]

those high notes hit me

[@MafuyuOribe]

I've been listening to your music for about 2 years now, and I just realized I didnt sub for awhile. Amazing music.

[@tistheratking]

im so glad this is the first time i've heard this song! i never gave it a listen until you covered it, and listening to the original after this is just. mindblowing. you put so much emotion into your singing and i can tell just by how it sounds. i cant put into words what im picturing when i listen but i can assure you it's all good things !!

[@roseaeries]

PLEASE TELL ME THIS IS ON SOUNDCLOUD SO I CAN LISTEN TO IT ON LOOP FOR HOURS 😭😭😭 MY LITTLE AUTISTIC BRAIN LOVES HEARING YOU ON REPEAT ALL THE TIME

[@liverenjoyer]

THOSE ARE SOMW STRONG VOCALS

[@abattleborn]

Wow, amazing, you are so talented, please upload more

[@DSPR_Cryptid]

I’m not crying, you’re crying dammit! For real though, this is an amazing cover Octi! Rest up and make sure to work at your own pace. Take care!

[@Taybegobyebye]

I'm not crying, you're crying! 😭 This is so amazing!!!!!

[@nesoberries]

This is genuinely such a beautiful cover of a song that I already hold close, thank you so much for sharing your passion and talent with us 💕 we’re always here to support you, whether you upload one cover or one hundred. I hope that you’re doing well and we’re sending you lots of hugs and support!!

[@Wishnstarz]

Your voice is absolutely enchanting! Please take care of yourself though. I’d rather wait years for your music knowing you’re okay rather than have consistent uploads at the expense of your health.

[@symeon5518]

This might be the best voice on the platform

[@sexyphoto4630]

Dude this literally gave me chills. Phenomenal job!!!!

[@demon-mk2jm]

I'm not crying ur crying 😭

[@TheBiohazard3179]

I'm surprised this isn't your most watched video it's your best one I listen to it multiple times a day!

[@jskkjsahk]

世界の中で一定数の方々の考えることは同じなんだなって思ったよ。 みんなお疲れ様。ちゃんと休んでね。

[@tinynekoking6488]

Honestly I absolutely love your voice. It’s so gentle yet powerful at the same time. You put so much emphasis at the stops and ends of every bar with so much emotion. But I personally feel “Joy Dreamer” has the better lyrical changes to this song. This song is basically self hatred incarnate. And what she sings perfectly vocalizes the raw depression of it. Your version is also nice for its own reasons though 😊

[@spaghettiinadictionary8645]

You always come back around when I need to hear your covers, new and old. Love it all 💓

[@Antmcleod95]

Those jumps in the chorus 👌🏾so impactful

[@Ch4r1e]

It's scary that I relate to this song

[@Daigankun_holyspiritual]

Same but not that much

[@Cloudydollz]

Same

[@helena6573]

This is amazing THANK YOU

[@kylemarlonlikesavocaship1810]

No one will care but I'm starting to see differences in my behavior. I'll end up detaching from my negative thoughts to anchor myself to reality(?) If that shares what i mean. Telling myself "Hey, you're just thinking that, you can do things, just trust me." So the ending lines of somebody being there is just so bittersweet, its like me being there for myself. Hopefully this isnt some mental illness, I don't really have anyone to say positive stuff when I want to slit my wrists.

[@OgreponMyBeloved]

this song is so me fr

[@BlahBlah-hw2vq]

You could post once a year and we’ll be here just as bright-eyed and bushy tailed. You gotta do what you love but within your limits. I would rather listen to something you made because you had a good time doing it rather than a song that felt like a chore and at the expense of your health. We love you!! Stay well!!

[@ZachPlum]

An Oktavia upload! What a nice birthday present!

[@nirvanafan58]

i love this song

[@aleedle_leee]

I finally got around to listen to this, and can I say that you really can bring the emotion out of any song? Because you really do. It makes me feel even more emotional bc of the meaning of this song and my history with it. Thank you for covering this song 💗

[@thebionicworm3477]

It's always exciting to see a new song from you Oktavia! But please be kind to yourself and take care of yourself. We'd rather have you safe and happy than have you putting out music at your own expense.

[@chaosdestructionlove]

This is beautiful, I really empathised with these lyrics while in a very very dark place when juby had released the video so it still has a very deep place in my heart. Your cover and execution of the lyrics is lovely and I'm glad to see this song add another great cover to its collection. :) I was just catching up on the songs you've posted in the last year or so. They've all been such a treat to experience so I hope you will prioritise your own health while making whatever excites you. Even if it takes longer you can really tell when someone is enjoying their work and I get that feeling from your last few songs especially. The jp covers made me curious about how you'd sound singing songs like yellow or deuce deuce... so I'm really excited to see what you have in store for us in the future.

[@kaneki3205]

Hey ! I listen to your covers a lot and thought it's about time for me to give you a little thanks ! This and your cover of hated by life itself ( i still cant believe how amazing you sang it and how perfect the lyrics were) are by far my favorites so far and you really helped me get throu some tough times. You deserve a much bigger stage but im glad i found you. Is there any chance you could make a cover of kisetsu wa tsugitsugi shiindeiku ??? Thats my absolute favorite song i think you would make a banger out of it. Wish you all the best

[@space_4392]

I love this song so much, and I’ve been wanting to hear you do a cover of it for a while. I’d talk to my friends about how good it would sound if you covered this song. This sounds so amazing! This might be my favorite version of the song.

[@ZenoBell016]

I’m unhappy with how much I’m beginning to contemplate my relating to this song, at 27…

[@brotherkhrayn3525]

Hell, I’ve been contemplating and relating to this song since I was 19… I’m 24

[@WhereHowWhenWhy]

Wow your range is incredible

[@jellyfiesh]

thanks for making these videos/covers you have helped someone very vital to me though I'm sure she's express that to you before.

[@charcoalangel7536]

I got excited to see you upload again (so excited in fact that I dropped everything to listen) HOWEVER make sure to take care of yourself. I'd hate for you to get overworked because of vocaloid covers.

[@soulshadowification]

I think this Vocaloid deserves a well placed THIS! (Oktavia playing Needy Streamer Overload reference) 😅

[@crimsy_y]

beautiful cover, one of the few awesome vocaloid english cover people. rant time! god damn, i can't listen to this song or sing it without this crying, because it's so real. feeling like i ruin everything and don't make things better ever. i feel no purpose being on this earth because there's nothing that i'm specially talented at. nobody notices me, and i'm just another nothing that people may glance at but not have a second thought about. constructing a fake personality because i want everyone to be happy but coming to realize i'm no longer myself. feeling like me just being alive hurts others. feeling like ending things would be the only real solution because it would make everyone happy to see me gone. but, towards the end of the song, it brings up another person to save the singer. the person making me want to not end things because they wouldn't want that. i'm really glad i found a few people for myself like that, or else i would be long gone by now.

[@Daigankun_holyspiritual]

Hey, you had depression?

[@celinekimi6493]

I'm feeling the same things right now...

[@PlayerUnaligned]

Hey, boss! I'm glad you're back! This song is absolutely amazing, I've been obsessed with these lyrics for years now, and hearing you sing them is like a gift. That said, make sure you're taking care of yourself. We love your singing and all, but your health is also important to us. So please, take care of yourself. It's okay if you don't produce covers as often. As long as it's something you're happy with and you aren't pushing yourself. Thank you, for yet another beautiful cover, Oktavia.

[@knownevildoer]

this is beautiful ily oktavia

[@Breannauploadscrap]

I hope you put this on Spotify haha. Wondering if you will do a redo of a cover like “Hated by life itself”

[@connorburke6926]

I have always loved your songs. I am just elated that you're okay and posting again! Take your time as a sculpture takes time to be carved from stone, singing a song, doing multiple takes to get it right takes time! ❤️ I love this one, instant save and share

[@whomst855]

Huh. That thumbnail looks familiar *Listen to the first 5 seconds* *Gets Flashbacks to the first time I listened to vocaloid* YUP IT'S THAT SONG-

[@jeremyappleton7544]

My little sisters love this song and your covers, can't wait to show them!! We luv ya!!! 💘👄💘