Should you trust your first impression? - Peter Mende-Siedlecki

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You can't help it; sometimes, you just get a bad feeling about someone that's hard to shake. So, what's happening in your brain when you make that critical (and often lasting) first judgment? Peter Mende-Siedlecki shares the social psychology of first impressions -- and why they may indicate that, deep down, people are basically good.
Lesson by Peter Mende-Siedlecki, animation by TOGETHER.

[@sinfuleldian9826]

In my community, it's more like the opposite, i tend to judge a person is good for giving me an umbrella because the nice action is relatively rare, while usually everyone is an asshole, in or outside a football match. :/

[@karaanne9620]

+Ouss DZ Every guy at every football match where I live is like him, but I ave been stuck in the rain more then once, and nobodies ever shared their umbrella with me. But, I live in a town of assholes.

[@jasontan5392]

Same here

[@fumomofumosarum5893]

+Ouss DZ true that.

[@ngNudraconis]

+Quantustellar dz in my country, if u are walking in a park and it rains. someone offers u an umbrella, then it means u're abt to get robbed. be careful

[@sinfuleldian9826]

ngNudraconis I forgot that. That's also in here too! This gives me trust issues.. ://

[@ethanwalker3392]

I honestly would be thankful for the umbrella. and thank the guy.

[@ShubhamThakkarShubhavatar]

***** That guy! 'Marcus Tullius Cicero' Deleted his comment! XD haha was he afraid of you? XD this has happened 2 me many times! after they delete their comments, our comments feel like a total joke! But even I let them be as they are.

[@user-my8qj]

Ethan Walker because you are kind.

[@Suhejla70]

Ethan Walker bv vgghhhuyyyujjioo

[@Suhejla70]

Shubham Thakkar nbqbnoiibcbb . .pmh*@ ¿+¿ .+}.[》_[

[@justcallrizq4589]

So that means, ur ppl in ur enviroment rarely gives umbrella to someone in need?

[@TheRandomAsian711]

Honestly, if it was raining and the guy offered me an umbrella, I'd take it. Some people get really competitive and passionate about their team, and their actions can change based on that, but they can still be 'good' people. It's more common for people to be jerks at sports events than for someone to offer an umbrella anyway, so maybe that's what's skewing my perspective.

[@hagalathekido]

little bubble

[@gallifreyanchocolate6058]

Same!

[@azlanmajid9378]

good explanation

[@bertinii]

I think that's what lacks in many cognitive psychology experiments, context. We don't judge in a bubble, but use our prior comprehension of social situations to do so.

[@tracydu8052]

Agreed

[@nicholasserfontein9712]

take the umbrella and be thankful to the person because maybe they'll see that being good is rewading and do something similar again

[@TheTsugnawmi2010]

The man is most likely in his 20 or 30s and only NOW is he figuring that out? Leave him. Have a warm shower and change when you get home.

[@fatimaelyaghzy2882]

+TheTsugnawmi2010 Well most criminals are at least twenty so one less potential asshole in the world wouldn't be so bad

[@TheTsugnawmi2010]

***** Why "most likely"? Where's your evidence to conclude that? It was not said in the scenario so you're just making excuses. Further, why are you getting drunk in a public place around children who are also present? So? You and him are not friends, colleagues or acquaintances. You have simply bumped into each other twice. The information is not "valuable" at all. You're never going to talk to him again. Go home and have that shower.,

[@talibolilm1336]

Alcoholism is a very bad trait, it'll only make it wore worse

[@secularismandhumanity5282]

Spiritof Perseus I totally agree.

[@carnotricecooker]

"A dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. Honestly. It’s the honest ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they’re going to do something incredibly stupid." - Captain Jack Sparrow

[@idanas3557]

my favourite quote

[@GarketMardener]

+carnotricecooker lmao

[@AlichinoAi]

YES! Best comment of my day!

[@dl3074]

Therefore, I should avoid a dishonest person 100% of the time!!

[@billete37]

Its true when i would lie nooo onnnee knew 😄 people take me way to seriously. Though i do admit i tend to be honest even when it causes trouble

[@redlotus1612]

First impression comes to us just by a random action which cannot portray the complete personality of a person. Therefore, I think we just use it as a factor to determine one's characteristic. It often takes me at least 1 month to have basic understanding about a person.

[@technologywontsaveus]

+Tuệ Liên Nguyễn Yes, I can asure you that it took me some time to get used to the people around me when I started working with new people. In the beginning, because you don't know each other, you kinda dance around each other to not say something stupid. But after a while, when you know each others names and like personalities, you can lift the relationship to a new level. So then you know what to say to which person, what to not say, how to interterpret if what he says is meant seriously or not and so on. And when you're comfortable with the other person, you can start talking to them about many things without letting it sound awkward or forced. And based on the first impression, I myself would not like if someone would judge me without maybe even hearing me speak, just on the way I look or my facial expression . I do that too, I can't help it, but what I can do is to say: Okay, this guy might seem weird, but since I haven't talked to him yet, I stay open minded and try to have an at least neutral opinion toward him and be nice to that new colleague or person. After some time passed, I see if he's a solid worker and when we have talked, I know at least if he's an okay person, see how moral he is and if we both like eatch other.

[@billete37]

I feel it can only take a few hours of continual interaction and or observation, people deviate in different environments around different people. I remember how my mom as a kid would be really ghetto around my sister n i but when on the phone with a billing company she was sweet as pie. I striggled with this issue as a child and subconsciously determined it to be a fraud and mask, i see in my own character that i dont deviate my behavior around anyone, as my general behavior is set to be appropriate at all times. This is not always true but if you met me youd see the consistency of my attitude and behavior to be very similiar and seemingly unchanging

[@corbinbarron8772]

You sir are slow

[@haphuongle2920]

One of my best friends used to hated me because my classmates badmouthed me to her. Nonetheless, after unexpected incidents, we became friends since and are still friends now.

[@uggmonster8795]

That being said, a first impression is important when placing initial trust in a person. If the first impression is negative, it's likely the will make more future negative actions than someone who had a positive first impression, therefore you should keep them more at arms length.

[@colbonthecob2530]

I've always assumed that my firat thought or impression, is what society wants me to feel, and my second thought or impression is how I really feel.

[@Msnaida123]

ColbOnTheCob I’m really curious, after 2 years do you still think this way? I won’t judge any answer so I appreciate honest answer :D

[@markuskilvr3259]

Wise!! Start meditating man. It will change your life. Search for the benefits here on KZbin. Practice it everyday and your will transform in terms of happiness and other measures

[@markuskilvr3259]

Amira ZB I know some psychology and it makes sense. Right away you judge someone by sosial rules (hiearchy) and secondly you can think for yourself

[@charimuvilla8693]

I tend to disagree with this. Sure society has some standards but it's up to you if you want to follow them or not and sometimes you see those standards so often, you follow them without realizing. But those standards are there even at the second thought. So i'd just say that society is affecting both first and second impression. How much is up to you.

[@warbler1984]

It's society, man!

[@cloe412]

People aren’t always behaving as the best versions of themselves. Sometimes, you can be down and you don’t behave the way you’d like to. But when others judge you because of it, it sucks. I hate people who lack empathy and are narrow-minded when they judge others based on limited understanding and assumptions.

[@obxurity]

One of the managers at work is not well liked by other coworkers but I made sure to give a good first impression and introduced myself politely and told this manager how long I worked at this store and my skills in each department. It's been months and she still treats me with respect and is polite when we pass by each other. I always make sure to leave a good first impression especially meeting a new manager because it will determine how well the relationship between the two of you will be!

[@hufflebuffben]

I was really hoping we'd get into how meeting people in different moods (having a good day vs a bad day) could also effect how we perceive other people (also having good/bad days) in that first encounter.

[@bagandtag4391]

I'm used to people being bad :C But when I do find a good person I don't care about the bad stuff they may do or have done.

[@Jonnie153]

me too

[@donessakleingalve8382]

Same

[@linhhoang1363]

You weigh the extraordinary more than the usual. In this case, the good person over those bad people

[@calebbbbbb1]

There is something called: Forgiveness.

[@csemionov]

Caleb Singletary Forgiveness does not exist. And if such a thing as forgiveness happens somewere sometime it's just for a short term, until that person does another thing that it's bad in our eyes. We, as human beings, are not able to forgive anybody on a long term/ permanently.

[@calebbbbbb1]

Claudiu Semionov Then im not human

[@emiliavieira6871]

forgiveness is something that 90% of people dont know how to do it

[@luckingk2537]

+Claudiu Semionov yeah like when you discuss with a person that has hurt you, but you kinda have "forgived" her, she will bring up those bad memorys, looking like you guys haven't move forward about this subject. It happens everywhere with anyone. Basically it is a short-term solution to a discussion that will end when you guys have another one. Its a infinite cycle.

[@emiliavieira6871]

you choose to move forward , simple as that

[@musicnoranges]

Last year at school I got really dizzy and I asked if someone could walk with me to the door before my mom could pick me up and a girl I barely knew got up immediately and walked with me and made sure I was okay. Now I have a super duper good impression of her just because of that one thing.

[@jonanthansalter9036]

"unusual behavior" at the football game....have you been to a football game lmfao?

[@mso2443]

+Jonanthan Salte ---- Screaming crazy drunks + football = go hand-in-hand. :D

[@commoncoolchannel8588]

I was thinking that if he had beer, he'd be drunk.

[@kishiakaik6513]

Yes. I’ve been. And men are all so crazy :D

[@gokulbalagopalpayyanur8080]

It's just an example

[@SJAutomotiveDesign]

This comment made my day.

[@jellyocean1000]

Ugh, i give out bad impressions all the time. Im shy and quiet when meeting new people. The other day, an acquaintance said i was shy while my friend said that i wasn't.

[@redd-qh4xn]

Cloudclaws AJ I can relate with you because in school people assume me being rude and annoying even though I am not they just saying that for being dishonest person. in reality I somewhat shy and awkard person it really frustrating is that people tend to judge me but didn't try to understand me in personal level. If we all have telepathy to understand people thoughts and emotion then we shouldn't have these problems from the beginning.

[@moshimochi1076]

@@redd-qh4xn This misunderstanding happens so often that im still thinking of building a machine or something that kinda seems like telepathy but science or something. Like it allows us to 1. feel the pain other people are feeling 2. be able to share thoughts and emotion kinda not possible for me tho HSAHH

[@angelakorodi5795]

Same 😭

[@ΗλίαςΡ-ο8υ]

Sometimes people choose to see only what they want to see. It's so much easier to say "Oh, this person ain't worth it!" than giving them a second chance and be understanding and courageous.

[@wendyhu7416]

Just learnt “impression” last semester! It is often formed fast with high accuracy of predicting behaviors. Impression has 4 determined factors: Valence, morality, warmth and competence. The new model of forming an impression suggests that knowing if a person morally good or not is more important than other factors, which is able to predict his/her overall attitudes. Some extra informationXD

[@Ruby-ot9yx]

i have a friend who i first perceived of as nice and loyal, but as soon as we were together in a new setting she showed her true colours, this really shows that in various occasions someone may seem very different than they are.

[@Elk0990]

We actually knew all these stuff more or less through experience, it's the way they explain it makes all the differences.

[@TD-jt4iy]

Hey you alive

[@the_otter5936]

I think people's behaviours can be so volatile that you shouldn't trust your first impression too much. For example, if you meet someone once and they're rude to you, you should give them the benefit of the doubt because maybe they're having a bad day and they're not normally like that. On the other hand, if you meet someone once and they're very generous or helpful, they might just be having a good day and are normally more indifferent.

[@Desimere]

The last time i changed my impression about someone, what they did was perfectly ordinary, but entirely unexpected. I think it's not the rarity, it's more like we are machine-learning machines who try to predict the future and if our predictions are wrong (the reality manages to surprise us), then we update our models. The rare action theory fits within this framework.

[@sd.sophie6337]

This is a really great observation! Thank you for that!

[@iceyyl3mon]

Yea I thought that too. We think it's the rarity because it's not like we expected it

[@flowersinhercrown]

Agreed!🙌🏼

[@ChristopherMei86]

I really love changing initial impressions on people, it's one of the learning experiences I love most in life.

[@TD-jt4iy]

I love life too but I wanna know if you still have life in you are you alive?

[@ChristopherMei86]

@@TD-jt4iy comment was from seven years ago, I died 5 ago, dude.

[@Roonlovesfish3874]

@@ChristopherMei86🤣🤣🤣👍

[@LinkEX]

Am I the only one that finds it unusual that someone would offer a stranger his umbrella in the rain? I'd most likely thank the guy and reconsider my first impression of him, as I consider that gesture just that kind of unexpected positive behavior described in the video.

[@avivastudios2311]

i offered a stranger my umbrella. it ain't that hard.

[@huangec]

Why unusual? Seems like the natural thing to do, assuming you're sharing the umbrella and not just giving it up for the other person.

[@TheGamerCreeper399]

So what about a good impression first, and then a bad one?

[@KamranKhan-ew2yd]

Lol... Your profile pic matches your expression (Question) perfectly....

[@aparnan2799]

Abort mission? 🤣

[@Shreya_Springs]

That can lead to two phenomenon: 1. Halo effect: the initial good impression is strong enough that it overshadow the later bad behaviour, or you'll find ways to justify that bad behaviour. 2. If the bad behaviour is an extreme case, polar opposite, or if the initial good impression wasn't as strong, then you'd be shocked and you may consider the bad behaviour as much worse than it actually is.

[@karamzidan9860]

@@Shreya_Springs i think i'm falling in love with your intellegence ! , How do you judge me based on this first imprission ? , lol

[@karamzidan9860]

@@Shreya_Springs i also like eminem too , we have something in common already , :D

[@Shayasalehi5]

“Should you trust your first impression?” America’s Got Talent: yes.

[@blueberrysky7599]

If someone did something unpleasant to me, or if they are acting like that, I won't think about their good side. I will be remembering the bad side only.

[@Priya-ky8rt]

The first 30 seconds of this video is basically every rom com ever

[@Moonshine1147]

"You can do 1000 good things for someone, and all they will remember is the 1 thing you did bad." #NukeHumanity

[@lonelycloud9085]

#NuKEhUmAniTy 😂😂😂 who hurt you son

[@strandedinanisland457]

nice hashtag

[@edwardgyan9749]

I support this hashtag😂. We must create a movement.

[@guesswho5790]

Most people I know are openly selfish and when they do that 1 nice thing everybody's like WOW THANYOUSOMUCH THATWASSOTHOUTFUL

[@kdk856]

Mani Kryptic's: Magical World of Obscurity you didn't get enough attention from your parents?

[@ZipplyZane]

The problem with this video is that someone offering to share an umbrella with you is really unusual, while being overly excited at a game, not paying attentions to others, and coming off as obnoxious is a lot more common. I mean, your premise does seem to hold--I did update my opinion of the guy based on his unusual action with the umbrella. Because that is more uncommon, I view the aberration to be the actions at the football game. I mean, I could see umbrella sharing being more common in a place where it rains a lot, but I'd still say obnoxious football fans are extremely common. There's one in every group.

[@labiba_k]

I love the way they explain this stuff. it's a much more easier way of learning!

[@francisganapin8767]

yes you are right

[@TD-jt4iy]

Hey it’s been 7 years you alive?

[@labiba_k]

@@TD-jt4iy yes I am...and I do not remember writing this comment LOL

[@labiba_k]

Still love their videos tho

[@MadBunnyRabbit]

What? Stranger offering an umbrella is typical? No freaking way. Seeing a jerk at a match is way more typical. Besides, I never really judge something on the bases of typical or not. Right now it's typical to shit on imigrants, no matter how many people I know say it, it doesn't piss me off any less the more people say it. If the supposition was that, we judge people based on our values and what we consider bad or good, typical or not in a sort of frame of referance based on situation. Then yeah, I'm inclined to agree with this. But generalising so much? No way, I'll never believe it. In this example, I would probably feel like a jerk that I judged a guy so quicly based on the fact that he was drunk and excited cheering up his team, but in reality, in everyday life he's a nice guy who would do a very untypical thing of helping someone out.

[@karlpoppins]

+MadBunnyRabbit True, but that was just an example. His point still stands, though.

[@MadBunnyRabbit]

P. Marios Christodoulou the problem I have is not with example per se, but with simplifaction and generalization. Like I said, if it was to say that we judge people based on our idea of good / bad, typical or not (in a given situation) then yeah. But if you generalize it to, it's typical that people do good, etc. then noo.

[@fatimaelyaghzy2882]

Yes same point. plus a football mach is a place for noise and competition in the first place maybe that person acts good all the time and that game is his outlet.

[@stickmanymickmany]

This response is really not understanding the video correctly.

[@MadBunnyRabbit]

stickmanymickmany do explain where is the error of my interpretation than :p

[@laibajahangir]

This makes learning so much more fun, for some reason? But still it does because I'm only 11 and I like learning this way

[@SuperNumber420]

keep learning, however you can(:

[@ianjaydelosangeles3173]

Good :)

[@no-jambear4529]

And now you are 14 or 15😂😂

[@MetalHead9042]

*Cheers*

[@shymaaibrahim699]

You are lucky ☺

[@90eulea]

Considering people tend to judge other based on their own perception of right and wrong I think that what you choose (to go for the 1st impression or re evaluate your opinion) is based on how rigid you are with your perception of self. If I was very strong in my opinion of what constitutes a good behavior or bad behavior and I met someone who portrayed a behavior I find unforgivable, I would keep with my 1st impression (because that’s a solid no no for me) but if I am someone that understands different perceptions, I’d be more likely to change the idea of my 1st impression because I would be more willing to write off the original impression as false or lacking in information

[@meymk5669]

For me, it's totally opposite. I try to stay positive about a person at first sight. I put effort to build a friendly relationship with them but when I see them being rude & dishonest with me repeatedly, I totally cut off my interactions with them & try to stay away from them. I really can't stand liars

[@hall5865]

I've been fooled by first impressions too many times. People have many sides so I think it's safer to observe them in many situations before making my own opinions about their characters.

[@mionnepallidare8116]

Up

[@MrHalfjack]

I have noticed lately that people I have decided that I dislike, I all of a sudden dislike them less. it's strange when I realize it's happening, and i'm surprised and I don't know what to make of it. sometimes it's something they do or say. sometimes it's when a usually annoying person that talks too much is suddenly quiet. I've noticed people are less annoying when they shut the fuck up.

[@sandra98facebook]

in that football game he wasnt really himself, he was overeccited so I wouldnt classify him as bad, and I appreciate every nice thing someone does for me because it's rare nowadays

[@dubbywubdtbakaalex335]

Rare nowadays? How can you say that if you can't really compare to how it was back then because you weren't alive back then to see?

[@blackmewtwo3569]

At this point in age if they can admit that they are wrong or don’t know something that’s a genuine person because at least that means they’re willing to figure it out

[@tabindaqureshi1981]

Every last impression is the first impression.

[@c0mput3r80y]

with the umbrella situation, I always give a new person three chances to do a nice thing or a bad one, and whichever one wins out of those three, that's how ill remember the person.

[@CreoTan]

*Story Time * I remember once, there was this classmate, a really annoying kid who was obnoxious and couldn't go five seconds without hearing his own voice, which, unfortunately, had nothing intelligent to say. He was the person who would repackage the same lame and vague insults about people behind their backs in an attempt to be "funny". I judged him by this, and generally tried to avoid him. Then, one day, I overheard that one of his friends had her heart broken. The same kid who called me fat for no reason was now being a supportive, comforting friend, who was promising this girl he would fix her problems, and looking genuinely concerned. I still avoided him, even afterwards, but it made me rethink him as a person. Just because he's obnoxious, doesn't mean he's a bad person, right? The End

[@gilanin]

Creo -Tan Let me tell you. There are people I absolutely dislike. Very, very few of them, are actually bad people by my standards. Most of them are just either obnoxious, or annoying, or have very disagreeable traits or personalities.

[@gandalfthegrey2171]

Creo -Tan Everybody has good things and bad things about them. We like to classify people as "good" or "bad" but it's waaay to simplistic. Even the best of people have bad traits/tendencies/things they struggle with. Everyone has bad days. Even the most evil people won't usually think themselves as inherently bad. They might see themselves as having made a mistake, but really, deep down they're a good person. Obviously no one else thinks that about people like Hitler. My point is, no body is perfect, or 100% good. Everyone has bad things about them- what's important is whether or not they KNOW they're bad, and if they're working on it. So he's not an entirely bad person. Sounds like your average human :)

[@technologywontsaveus]

+Creo -Tan Usually nobody is 100% good or bad. And also as one smart guy told me, we all play roles when we are around other people. Like myself, with friends, with girlfriend, at work, at school, at a meeting, at the supermarket and so on and on and on. That means, we do not behave the same way when we are around different people. Like I can talk to my friends about stuff that I wouldn't ever talk to my work mates or parents. I would be nice to a friend, but not knowing what to say to a work mate. Or a bully would enjoy playing sports or hanging out with friends, but being bored in school and therefor being obnoxious to his school mates.

[@submarinemagnet7965]

In short: The more "out of the ordinary" for you that something is, depending on how good or bad it is to YOU, then it will MORE LIKELY be more impactful than the other traits/observations that you are used to.

[@csg1381]

Consider this: a « bad » action has potentially more consequences than a « good » action if you are the unfortunate victim. In consequence, it feels normal to protect oneself.

[@sakuranovaryan9261]

I always get inspired by the people who have the maturity to forgive things..I tend to hold grudges a lot and that's something i try to change cause..i think everybody could use a little bit of kindness just like i do sometimes. I think I will forgive somebody if they were self aware of what they did and apologised for it. I just don get that often. I'm not looking for sympathy i just wish somebody would care enough about me to apologise to me. It's all good tho. I'm not sad or anything.

[@freespiritable]

That explains why my mom was so quick to point out my mistakes but never knowledged my success.

[@sidrahhasan331]

I changed my mind regarding someone after thoroughly thinking about why i disliked him in first place. . The reasons for having a first "bad" impression were quite not strong and so i changed my mind.. he was not a bad guy, it was only that i was taking too much of an offense over pretty non-issues.

[@RachelWangCal]

Darcy in Pride and Prejudice

[@hittingyouoverthehead]

+Rachel Wang Darcy in Thor.

[@horvathlaszlo96]

+Rachel Wang Spoilers... I hate you!

[@nekonesan9112]

+alwayslate Spoilers for 19th century literature? That seems completely reasonable.

[@horvathlaszlo96]

NekoNēsan Little damn do I give. As long as I have not read the book yet, I'll classify that as spoilers.

[@SenecaGray]

+NekoNēsan Spoiler alert: Darth Vader is Luke's father. Even if everyone and their dog knows that by now...

[@phunglenguyenphi42]

This is about one time I've changed my mind about a man. He is one of the coaches in my taekwondo class, at the first times we met, he acted pretty rude and call me and some girls by the unacceptable way, and I don't think I had a good impression for him. But one day, that was a day that I feel so depressed ( maybe because of my mental illness ), wasn't interested in anything, or probably I was lonely, suppose that no one care and understand me. You know what, his behaviour was good and gentle out of the blue, and he did call me more politely, his attitude at that day made me feel better. Then yea, I've changed my thoughts about him, he also have some good aspect, and isn't bad that much :>

[@Carpe_de1m]

i feel like being nice is more rare then being “bad”. i only notice small bad things but never small good things.

[@KaliumX]

The situation don't matter... The key concept presented in this video does!

[@WiseDude50]

So basically: -You will not trust a person you thought off badly, however if he does something good it will have higher impact because hes usually bad, the opposite goes for the good side (if he makes a bad thing it will have more impact then when a bad person does a bad thing). -If a good person wants to be thought of as one he must make even better actions that people dont usually make. (donating to charity, helping someone even more then you should). It makes sense :D! Although I didnt get the answer to the question your title mentioned I will get my own (which TED-Ed probably aims for), that is my conclusion is that I will not trust my first impressions, because 1 outcome shouldnt affect all the other outcomes, that is if someone makes a bad impression, I shouldnt judge him based on his first impression, I will judge him based on his following ones, the ones to come that is!

[@technologywontsaveus]

+WiseDude50 I agree! Judge a person on a few impressions, of course you can't forget the first impression but since everybody has a bad day and their flaws, do unto others as you want them to do onto you (sorry for bad English). I see it as this. Think of work. If you screw up once, your boss or colleagues get angry. Even though you did everything right 99 times before. So that one mistake is weighing heavier than all the 99 good work days before. Or if a club that has lost 8 games wins a game, it's something special, if a club wins every game, they expect it and it's as almost nobody notices it. I think "special" and the element of "surprise" are key words here. And all movie and tv show watchers know how much they love the element of a suprising twist, when it turns out that the nice neighbour actually is the murderer.

[@hybridgoth]

I'm more used to seeing people act indifferently towards each other and thus positive interactions always stand out for me😁

[@MegaCombatGamers]

I love Addison Anderson's voice, he should get more recognition for his narration skills.

[@amaterasunpro7423]

i sometimes forget about the person who been a jerk to me, give them a second chance, or rarely "see myself in them" but i feel like there is more bad than good in the world.

[@TD-jt4iy]

You alive? Yes maybe no

[@emperorbartu2414]

how did a guy from the different team sit next to me

[@christinaspiridou5429]

That's what I thought too, Batman.

[@emperorbartu2414]

Χριστίνα Σπυρίδου 👍

[@99gypsies]

+Bartu Muzo -- maybe they were at a Little League game! ;-) -- or do they have two sets of bleachers at little league games also?

[@hdr2540]

Neutral ground.

[@simp8966]

Lol stop overthinking this video😅

[@glennbrown3426]

If you get a bad gutt feeling , ALWAYS LISTEN to it!

[@bettertraining3491]

I have a similar outlook: I always felt that I am looking for : 1: What behaviors a person has made "easily accessible" to themselves: parameters. 2. Taking a behavior that is generally negative and using it to make your first impression upon others is Anti-social by definition. A person who is considering interacting with a new person again in the future will adopt a neutral or pro-social stance.

[@mustbetheSUN]

Where I live we would all get to the opposite conclusion. Our first impression at the football game wouldn't even be an impression because everyone is that obnoxious guy when it comes to football. But giving an umbrella to a random stranger? Whoa is this guy even real, I love you.

[@lames4815]

I really like the voice of the narrator

[@zahraali5018]

Oh I have been working on for some time now to change my first impressions about people and to think about the good things they have done, for I think you can get nowhere with a lot of negativity in your brain towards other people

[@haroonahmed7771]

"First impression is the last imperssion". PERIOD!!!!

[@musicandmusic1627]

Nop you are wrong.

[@humongousppenergy6693]

Having already known this info, it gets fun whenever I'd get the chance to meet new people.

[@robertsivils5983]

Yes but people are generally jerks when it comes to thinking their team is the best. The fact that it was raining and there weren't a thousand people offering an umbrella should have been the greatest influencing factor.

[@violettippet5246]

I agree I rarely go off first impressions and I always give people second chances. I am more weary, if they make bad first impressions, but if the second and third time I meet them they've been nothing but nice etc, my first impression goes away.

[@alanford8479]

When I first meet someone I don't really care enough to judge them. I've never instantly made a judgement about someone's personality as soon as I meet them. Nor do I really acknowledge them unless need be. If someone is rude to me I don't really care, I don't say anything and haven't given them a reason to be rude. I'm a simple person, just be nice , don't touch my things and we are good; I don't care about you or judge you.

[@Ethanialson]

I learn more watching youtube than i do in a year of school.

[@georgesamaras2922]

YT is all over the place and its up to you to keep a schedule. School expects you to adhere to a specific schedule. They are not the same, but they are complementary

[@liebesleid]

I do youtube to get myself in context, and school/books to really learn it.

[@rociogallegossanchez]

That's because you're watching youtube videos instead of paying attention lol

[@mariapopp6924]

School= indoctrination

[@TD-jt4iy]

And you grown up so are you alive?

[@kdk856]

i'd say 80% of my first impressions were good and saved my social life. always trust them

[@RandyRandersonthefamous]

3:58 I don't think its about rarity of those actions but the capacity for harm. If I compare two people, one who killed someone and another who stole they have very different capacities for harm based on those actions.

[@bingobango4281]

Never judge a book by its cover. First impressions are important to some people. Which means some people have developed a rehearsed act that quotes what they want others to hear. This helps some (honest)people make it thru anxieties from new settings. While others use it as a way to maintain the facade of lies they enjoy

[@ghostderazgriz]

*Reads title* No, first impressions are usually wrong. That's my first impression anyway... wait...

[@bringmethatcoffee5235]

I think what really counts here is our own understanding and us being humble. We should KNOW that ppl sometimes behave "bad" without meaning to. Every each of us did something bad or said something wrong at one point of our life. But one mistake does not make out the person. Some people I disliked at first turned out to be very good friends to me. I learned my lesson. I began reminding myself: 1) They might have had a bad day. 2) Maybe they don't know that that behaviour was inappropriate. 3) I don't know the complete background of Person B. Aaaand so on. Humble people do not think they know everything.

[@AkechiWasRight]

Okay u asked a question (in the title) but can u like answer it as well, is it yes, no, maybe or only on certain occasions cause i believe with this thinking i will doubt my first impression more as u just told me to think about it.

[@SeanTheDon17]

This relates to research by the Nobel prize winning economist Daniel Kahnemann. He presented the idea of Loss Aversion where people put greater weight(2.0x) on losses than gains. These often are based on our other cognitive biases such as anchoring. Our impressions create such a lasting effect, its important to deconstruct how we see those in our world.

[@ryanb.839]

1:29 Yes we all know humans weigh more than umbrellas thank you very much

[@Aki-lf8pd]

Most of the time, as I get to know that person over time by seeing their actions, proves me that my first impression about them was right. But in this case, even if it feels awkward, I would just be thankful if that person offered to share his umbrella with me.

[@ChaseKelleh]

I've got to the point where everyone I know, I treat them like it is the first time i've met them. They have a clean slate, unless they do something over the line, then i just drop communication to them. Pretty easy way to live and I've only made one enemy doing it, but he was an idiot.

[@aribahossain6234]

I just gave an online test for admission to a new English coaching and the sir over there puts heavy emphasis on tests, especially the admission ones that determines first impression. He openly admitted he treats those students better who he have good first impressions of. I got so nervous at his statement that my test did not go very well...what do I do? My mum is gonna be so upset!

[@Lumosnight]

I have to say that in my personal experience, first impressions are usually accurate. I can only count a few examples on one hand the times the first impression was completely wrong.

[@gamerteeb794]

From what I'm getting here, if a person were to weigh the good interactions over the positive ones, would that mean that the person experiences more negative than good interactions with others? Or are there other factors not accounted for in the video that can change the typical way we behave?

[@vegaarcturus509]

"I wouldn't trust my first impression because that will be my last impression of him" - Someguythatgotkilledbyastranger

[@blueshoes915]

There’s first impressions based of our bias (wrong) and first impressions based of our intuition (right). If your intuition is telling you someone is bad, listen to it. However, if you’re just going off of how they look or other meaningless factors, give them a chance.

[@SydRainn]

I wasn't aware this was how first impressions worked. All my life, a simple brief conversation could tell me most about that person's character, and it would usually be accurate. I think, out of the people I've met and regularly communicated with, only about five people I misjudged. Maybe it's because I've run into a lot of bad people when I was younger, and they all had a curtain characteristic my brain picked up on subconsciously, so I don't really think of a first impression, I go with my gut and it's almost always right.

[@Horatiu.C]

my experience taught me that americans are one of the most likely nations not to know a second language. some of them may think they know some other language, but when they talk to a native speaker they quickly realize it isn't so. on the other hand they are always surprised how fluent others speak english no matter where in the world they travel. i'm sorry if this isn't so, but it was true for all the americans i've met, and i met quite a few. (i'm eastern european in case you're curious)

[@ayp5177]

I usually ignore my first few impressions, i think people's personality and thoughts are too vast to judge it all in a few moments. I think everyone has a capability to be both a 'good' and 'bad' person

[@TooterU]

He tried to say that it depends whether you should trust your first impression or not. If the first behaviour is more rare than the second behaviour then you can trust your first impression. If it is the other way around, then you shouldn't go with the first impression.

[@Mcgif21]

Did you say people are good more than bad? What world do you live in? The good and bad tendencies of humans is pretty equal.

[@anitafrieda]

No. Humans are typically more good than bad.

[@Yoyomeyo]

Tbh I haven't come across many strangers who offer an umbrella. I would probably reconsider my opinion of him because I'd see that as a nice act if he remembered me from the game and so offered his umbrella when I needed it. Plus lots of people get passionate at games

[@GoldoGolderson]

I thought it meant gut instinct but this is a pretty good video too

[@limerence8365]

I have never had a stranger lend me their umbrella. I'd say it would be more out of the ordinary for someone to do that particular good deed.

[@diegoruiz2186]

"If you judge others you have no time to love them" - Mother Teresa hehe

[@zahlen_0092]

@Li yeah she was a lunatic, but this quote I agree on to a certain extent, just that judgment is inevitable anyways, it's on one's decision to act on it though

[@holysong2099]

She was a foul lady

[@kookiecastro8452]

*I will post diz*

[@ungabungalunga1002]

@@zahlen_0092 that women was so devious they should have declared her satan's bride instead of saint

[@evankaz3156]

I agree with some things:-Immoral behaviour is more revealing of a person's true character-Comparative rarity is important.... However, I disagree with the idea that there is a singular 'first' impression that shapes your views on someone. Or rather, I would hope that most people don't do that, because it's a very simplistic low level way of human interaction. But unfortunately I guess most people do that. I think a better view would be to take a 'first' impression in varying contexts (when a person benefits from a situation, when a person is indifferent, when a person needs something, when they get rewarded, when they don't etc..) and then pool those together to formulate your thoughts on someone's character.

[@JonatasAdoM]

"Should you trust your second?"

[@QuailTale]

I'm often good in describing a person through a photo, even though I never met that person 🤷🏻‍♀️ so first impression is it for me

[@irisdescent522]

*having a multiple choice questions* Teachers: always trust your first choice Me: *choose A* Minutes later.. Me: *choose B* At the end of the exam Friends: y'all the answer is A Me: 👏

[@masumkhan3903]

What I believe is that you must appreciate some one 's good deed instead remembering that bad which was caused in past.what if some is nice with you in the first time but horrible on the second🤔.so do appreciate and do forgive instead of judging and having a bad day.

[@lechihieu2606]

In short, I have no chance to change my first impression with my crush

[@asiaattia2773]

Yes ,we should really trust our first impression,and our instinct , sometimes our instinct predict about something wrong, and I know how keep going with someone or something until that something wrong happens

[@thomasaquinas2600]

First impressions are important and some times all-informative. The only caveat is that you must be open-minded about correcting first impressions. You might've been fooled by any number of things, only to find the subject is far more erudite...or less...than first thought. Or, someone ravishing might prove less attractive as you converse and get to know them.

[@thecaveoawesomeness]

Maybe it's cause I'm a New Yorker but almost no one would ever offer an umbrella to someone in the rain, even an old lady, but a lot of people who I know are fine and upstanding citizens go all out at a sports game when it's their team, I'm mainly talking about college sports where people paint themselves (which is dumb lol)

[@sld1776]

"First impressions rule, or why job interviews reward slick liars."

[@cubedude76]

I think it depends on the situation. I think the video meant that you should follow what you feel because your brain probably weighs the actions against each other just fine without needing to think about it much since it evolved this way.