Simple 4 Step Apology to Repair Conflicts and Disconnection

How to get HER in the MOOD (funny)
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We have to learn how to apologize in order to restore connection and closeness after a Conflict.
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#marriageadvice #relationshipproblems #conflictresolution

[@deeps6979]

Need to get that last asterisk on a billboard and some shirts. "The best apology is changed behavior." Love it.

[@g.strobl4458]

That would be the perfect Merch

[@edenalicerosebelovedchildo5958]

These are the steps in a repair that i learned from a therapist: 1. Timing 2. Listen to the effect that it had on the other person. 3. Acknowledge the effect. 4. Apologize. 5. Ask if there is anything else the person needs from you at this time. 6. Open Door - Let them know that you are open to having additional conversations about this in the future.

[@suzanadsuza4819]

Thank You for sharing these steps !

[@MicheleEngel]

EXACTLY. I was taught the same thing. ❤

[@aperta7525]

That's the best.

[@inspired2rv661]

I love this! It’s not easy for me to do this with my husband. We try and it always goes badly. We both struggle to focus on anything but wanting to be right or not being wrong. I think we just don’t know how to care about each other any more. Resentment has taken over like a cancer. I wish I had learned this years ago. We are both so darn stubborn! I’m not giving up though. I struggle to overcome the strong emotions that rise up in me and make him the bad guy. Even if I don’t say anything, he feels it and gets triggered. Ugh! We’re in therapy too, and we are making progress, but it’s not easy for me. It’s hard for me to love when I’m being told I’m wrong and he feels the same. I don’t feel safe sharing my feelings. 😢

[@lynnemorse1539]

Love ❤ this!!

[@sharicoburn5475]

Is it blatantly obvious to anybody else that we are failing our children by not teaching them how to interact and apologize with others

[@v9b23j]

"Here's what I'm gonna do to prevent this from happening again" - this is crucial. Apology without sharing an action plan and acting accordingly means nothing.

[@AndaraBledin]

Don't forget that when you apologize, be specific in what you are apologizing for. It's not just "I'm sorry." It's "I'm sorry for Action."

[@sharicoburn5475]

I kind of boils down to maturity. If people know how to act in a mature responsible way then a lot of this can be avoided.

[@stoneyvowell1239]

I'd like to think so myself, but everybody's definition of mature is different. There will always be conflicts when you get two or more individuals together. People just don't like differently than themselves.

[@sharicoburn5475]

@@stoneyvowell1239 I respectfully disagree. Maturity is a defined term.

[@stoneyvowell1239]

@sharicoburn5475 and so are many other terms that the definitions seem to change every 5 years or so. That still does not stop people from having their own definitions or associations. It's one of the biggest problems in communication. People can argue till the cows come home about what a definition of a word is or their interpretation of the definition is. Even most mental conditions get confused even though they are clearly defined in the DSM. Most dictionaries anymore are even wishy-washy with their definitions to suit social narratives.

[@tyedie4490]

I think that this is about people gaining that maturity. It doesn't just happen overnight, it's something that is honed over time and with effort.

[@alil7191]

This is a great way to apologize to our kids as well.... ❤

[@chrissyemert8781]

I tell my hubby that a lot. "Things aren't changed until they change.' and "don't say sorry, just don't repeat the behavior"

[@jackdeniston6150]

Describe a time you apologised to him.......And made it right, not just mouth noise...

[@chrissyemert8781]

@@jackdeniston6150 I have apologized for things that weren't even my fault.

[@jackdeniston6150]

@@chrissyemert8781 Describe

[@ThePsychicClarinetist]

​@@jackdeniston6150 Imagine pushing your nose into someone else's relationship...

[@essentialsteffi4706]

Best apology is changed behavior. Best quote ever!

[@Dragonmoon8526]

So true. It's so easy be on one extreme or the other. Completely defensive and unyielding. Or over sympathetic and bending over backwards. Neither one of those actually dealing with the problem or trying to find resolution. But instead focusing on surface level feelings and emotions.

[@erica.142]

Very very wise

[@Asharra12]

Yeah, my husband flip flops between both, but neither are real apologies. The bending over backwards seems nice, but it's not genuine, and I know from experience he'll go right back to the previous behaviour.

[@Dragonmoon8526]

@Asharra12 That's the other issue about failing to address the problem. There's no chance for accountability, growth, and change. Just hurt and resentment on one side or both. But, as you said, the person has to be willing to actually take action, too.

[@jackdeniston6150]

Both are tantrums

[@Dragonmoon8526]

@@jackdeniston6150 Agreed.

[@MillerRelationshipGuide]

Conflicts happen. The opportunity for growing a deep connection lies in that healthy mending process.

[@anniegentle15]

Keep excuses out of your apology. Thank you! This needs to be emphasised more. When I hear an excuse with an apology I want to say ‘so will you behave poorly the next time happens? If you have no intention of changing behaviour, the apology is worthless.

[@abbykoop5363]

I love this. I tried so hard to keep my statements about how I felt and yet my ex would immediately (before i even started talking really) just roll his eyes and say "what have i done now?" I can now recognize that he was carrying over unhealed hurts from HIS ex....but no matter what i said, or how, he got defensive. (Our biggest one was "I feel disrespected when you are late and don't contact me to let me know) Anyway, i guess that's one reason he's now MY ex....haha.

[@sharicoburn5475]

We cannot heal other people's unsecure attachment styles it is up to them to do their own work. Good for you for realizing this and putting him in the rearview mirror.

[@aperta7525]

I was doing the same, until the breakup. In my case he was dismissive too. The dam burst at the time of and after the breakup (you think there's only one, until you realize there's more).

[@tonnahmichaels4297]

“Best apology is changed behavior”… YES! Also, you can apologize to me and I can forgive you with an unconditional love, but that doesn’t mean that I trust you. Trust is built from seeing the changed behavior in action. This is a concept that I had to learn as an adult and am now teaching my kids.

[@kezzerz]

I love your channel, and I really wish people would apply this knowledge more. There's no need for fights if communication was THIS clear to begin with, but there are sooo many factors going into what needs to happen, how comfortable a person needs to be with their Partner, and creating a safe space for talking about your feelings.

[@mshuneebee7752]

Finding you has really helped my partner work on himself and understand where I come from when we are communicating.

[@nicholaslarmour5647]

My old relationships always made me feel like I wasn't doing enough. As someone thats on the spectrum if you just tell me your mad at me i will fawn and fawn and fawn. A lot of people dont realize that to do better, the person will need support in changeling their habits. All people deserve to be told they are helpful and bring love to peopels lives, and if they aren't holding up on their apology/behaviour then they need to the maturity to tell their partner when this change is hard and more communication can hopefully open up

[@ariat8202]

I really appreciate the videos like these that actually explain in detail like almost scripted, verbatim, healthy ways to communicate thank you so much

[@jenniferbates2811]

This is for all of the different relationships in our lives.

[@christinelockwood3497]

Okay, but how do you handle a situation where you both reacted in a way you shouldn’t have and hurt the other person, but they don’t see anything wrong with their actions? Do you apologize for your part and then let it go? Or do you also make them aware of the things you weren’t okay with? And if you should make them aware of the things you weren’t okay with, how do you go about it? Do you apologize first, let a few days or weeks go by and then say something? Do you let them know right after you’ve apologized? Or do you bring it up to them first and then apologize for your part? I also don’t try to make excuses when I apologize, I try to take responsibility for my actions, because I can’t fix a problem if I don’t acknowledge it. However, I do have a tendency to explain why I did or said something as a way to foster understanding. Several friends have pointed out that it sounds like I’m trying to make excuses, but I don’t know how to stop. I hate being misunderstood and I know, too, that when I understand why someone did something, it makes it easier for me to let it go.

[@ravenraven966]

I understand about explaining...it's not excuses...just trying to explain why... I get it

[@skippycoulter]

I think often when hurt people do 'apologies' they let a performance of power exchange and humility (or even humiliation) interfere with a reconciliation and healing process. They want to know you know you hurt them - which is a vital step - but then they get stuck on an idea that that should involve submission from the person apologizing. So when one takes an active participatory role in reconciliation they get frustrated because they aren't getting the thing they think they want. Of course sometimes our own desire to explain can feel like it is drowning out their plea to have their feelings heard and validated. I know I don't always strike the balance (ADHD) and especially if they are used to people who do actually deflect they can't hear that you are trying to reassure them you didn't want to hurt them, they hear you defending yourself and absolving yourself of responsibility. There is only so much you can do if someone is unwilling to truly participate in a healing moment, but emphasizing your understanding of their feelings and demonstrating that more can help if they seem frustrated. As to how to navigate both of you doing something wrong there isn't a one size fits all approach. Sometimes it is vital for the reconciliation to hash out everything in a big moment of high effort. But sometimes they don't have the bandwidth to both make a plea for validation and also respond adequately to your own. If a person feels they can't express to you without it opening a big emotional work session they might be reluctant to act since they are aware of the workload it entails. So sometimes you gotta split up the parts and work on each side's hurt at different moments. You always deserve to have your feelings validated and not have to ignore your own hurt for somebody else's - but sometimes you can do that at the same time as apologizing, and sometimes you need to do it separately.

[@MicheleEngel]

If I’ve said or done something I want to apologize for, then I apologize as soon as possible. If the other person has also said or done something that hurt me, I would apologize for my actions first. Then I would express my feelings and hope the other person listens, takes it seriously, and is willing to apologize. If not, then that’s THEIR limitation, and we have to accept that, too. Can’t make anyone else feel sorry or say they’re sorry. Just have to move on….

[@aperta7525]

A mature apology is unconditional. You apologize for your part and let the rest go. You can't change or control other people.

[@inspired2rv661]

I get this! My husband and I are both so stubborn, being right or not being wrong creates issues often. 30 years of not knowing how to handle conflict has built so much resentment. Wish we had learned this stuff sooner, and grateful for this platform. We’re in couples therapy now and it’s helpful and it’s so hard to break the patterns. It’s happening but it’s a slow process for us.

[@positivevibe7684]

Great tips!! At the mature age of 60+, I'm blessed to be open to learning something new every day. ❤❤

[@Krunschy]

One thing that really helped me was realizing the difference between being able to understand and being able to reenact a feeling. Used to think that I can only apologize properly, once I properly understand the issue of my partner to a point of being able to imagine myself in their shoes and feeling similar feelings. In reality people are extremely different however, so much so that some situations can trigger feelings in one person, which another person would've been completely unaffected by. This doesn't make the feelings any less valid, nor does it mean you can't understand the feeling simply for what they are, even if you don't completly understand their origin yet. You can get to the bottom of it eventually, but that won't be a priority then and there.

[@christelleny]

"We can't apologize if we don't/can't understand what we did". THAT, ladies and gentlemen, is the key to EVERYTHING! Learning to apologize can be taught BUT... if someone's level of self-awareness, introspection and empathy is low or non-existent (narcissists, for example), they're simply INCAPABLE of apologizing. So work with (and give a chance to) partners who can reciprocate, and let everyone else go. Friendly advice. ❤

[@KitsuneFyora]

Thats something ive been saying for awhile now. "Dont apologize if you dont really mean it." I dont want to hear the words, "im sorry". I want to see the change happen BECAUSE you're sorry. Same goes for me as well. I dont want to apologize if i expect to do it again. So instead, i want to focus on making sure the next time i do it is not as negatively impactful.

[@theBear89451]

People with a high external locus of control can't take accountability. Their brain simply cannot see the world objectively. Similarly, people with high internal locus of control apologize for things that are not their fault. The worst of all is the insincere apologies to avoid conflict.

[@sharicoburn5475]

Totally agree I had what is now an ex-boyfriend who after his two failed marriages would immediately say okay I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry!!!!! And then run and hide. Could not ever get him to resolve one conflict. Immature.

[@aperta7525]

In my(f) case, my ex(m) wouldn't communicate grievances and would still be trying to guilt statements of accountability from me. Even after maturely apologizing for the impact of this or that, he'd just sit there and say "that's not really the issue". Communication games are "ex-ing"-worthy.

[@positivevibe7684]

@thebear Very well stated. I agree💯. My husb is on the spectrum and sees the world differently than I do. He shared with me that he sees things and handles things up high or down low...no in between. He gets frustrated sometimes with himself when he's not able to communicate his feelings. He would talk and say, never mind. I'm like, no, get it out, it's ok. And he will get it out. And the thing about it, he makes good sense. Sometimes, he doesn't trust himself to speak what he feels. He suppresses his feelings a lot of the time. He doesn't want to do or say the wrong thing. He's pretty hard on himself. I love him dearly. ❤❤

[@sharicoburn5475]

@@aperta7525 that gets into narcissistic personality and there is no right way to communicate with them The only thing you can do is put them in the rearview mirror

[@TinaLe]

This video was nice at breaking everything down. I would have also liked a roleplay example at the end that brings it all together.

[@hippiechick2112]

I like the change of behavior statement. It involves communication and open thinking. Thank you!!!

[@Juubith95]

This feels like an appropriate apology only for mild conflicts. Unkind words and forgotten chores etc. But if the people who harassed me and beat me as a child would say something like this, I feel like it would only make everything worse

[@aperta7525]

Offering amends is the key to everything. Although usually a "I'm sorry, it wasn't my intention to hurt you. Is there anything i can do to make it up to you?" and follow up/follow through suffices. But I think I like the recognition of wrongdoing as such too that you added in there.

[@izabelcrivelli1612]

Jimmy, thank you so much for all videos! They are instructive, fun and really helpful! Hugs from Brazil!

[@owendejong9711]

I think its also important to let yourself have some time to reflect on your actions, and see if you actually feel sorry, and only do the later steps if you actually feel that way. Sometimes you do things in the moment and they tell you its upsetting them. Of course you can immediately assure them you didn't mean to make them feel that way, but if you don't feel sorry at the moment, just explain your POV for that time. I don't think you should really apologize just for the sake of it, but only when you mean it. Reflection also helps to prevent and recognize if the other is making you feel wrong so they can manipulate you, which you also just need to be aware of with some people.

[@peterclarke7006]

The apology bit is more about recognising that something you did upset your partner. Whether you say sorry for what you did is less important than saying sorry for making your partner feel upset. I'm probably not explaining myself very well so, for example: Her: "I'm annoyed. You said you would do the washing up, and you instead are playing on your phone." Me: "I'm sorry I annoyed you. I didn't realise. That was inconsiderate of me." See, I'm not apologising for not doing the washing up, I'm apologising for not realising that reneging on a promise would be annoying, and next time I need to be clearer when making a promise so we both know where we stand. She doesn't really care WHEN the washing up occurs, she just wants assurances that I'm actually going to do it, so I *could* have said "I'm gonna do the dishes, but I'm just gonna have a sit-down for half an hour to let the lovely food you made go down." We shouldn't need to think too hard about whether we're sorry we annoyed a loved one. That should be a default response.

[@owendejong9711]

@@peterclarke7006 Hey thanks for the response. Your example definitely helped to explain your point. My advice was a bit more for people that have situations where they do not really feel sorry for what they did, apologize anyway. Like you feel you did right, and then end up saying sorry for the sake of it. I basically recommend not doing that. You can always say like "hey sorry you feel that way, I did not realize that" like in your example. But you do not have to do the "That was inconsiderate of me" part if you are not sorry at the moment. If for example you agreed to do the washing this evening, and you just needed that phone break at the moment since you just came from work, you didn't really break any agreement and thus you have nothing to apologize for. Does that make sense? Like some people would make you feel not good because you are not doing exactly as they are saying. Was more advice meant for people stuck in more toxic environments not feeling worse for not apologizing.

[@peterclarke7006]

@@owendejong9711 I'd say it's much more about validating their feelings. The reality is, whether you felt you'd broken a promise or not, your behaviour led them to feel that you had, and that's the bit you're acknowledging by apologising. Also, I would stick to "I'm sorry I made you feel that way, it wasn't my intention," than "I'm sorry you feel that way, I didn't realise." The first is acknowledging that your behaviour impacted them, whereas the second is basically getting dangerously close to implying that they are the ones to blame for how they feel.

[@aperta7525]

​@@owendejong9711Pride/ego doesn't foster a healthy environment within the individual nor within interpersonal dynamics - especially not with a romantic partner.

[@owendejong9711]

@@peterclarke7006 We are very close in that regard. I think I was thinking too much from a POV where you are in an abusive relationship (I did try to tell that) and you are seeing it from the POV of a healthy relationship. Like I was really picturing in my mind someone that would make you feel bad for not doing something within 5 minutes of them telling you to.

[@lisaporter4244]

Thank you for this. Good stuff.

[@KaysHealthFix]

The only thing is, when boundaries HAVE been mentioned numerous times, and that behavious is constantly repeated over and over, there IS accountability required by the offending partner, if they dont care enough to quit their ignorance. By causing a fight because their actions are so frustrating. And no care on their part to help you through your own sensitivities- when you have made the boundries clear. No boundary respect. ? Then there's gaslighting of said boundries. Edit. I guess that IS gaslighting.

[@KaysHealthFix]

Then their other response to you is when others overstep boundries toward you. I'm told I'm being a victim. Victim mentality. No. I'm trying to make healthy boundries which are clearly not respected. I've done nothing wrong yet I'm being portrayed as such? No way!

[@dillp2267]

It bothers me so much when I’m genuinely hurt by someone’s repeat bad behaviour and then he tells me I’m having victim mentality. Oh and then he says I must be a narcissist for being hurt because narcissists have victim mentality. He also admits he has narcissistic tendencies (selfishness, loves attention, etc) His responses leave me flabbergasted.

[@KaysHealthFix]

@dillp2267 this is where it is required from them, to show empathy for your situation. A genuine response is to show empathy and put themselves in your shoes. Problem is, a narcissist is not good at empathy, because their lack of emotions required, to SHOW empathy. Just isn't there. So frustrating and you're left feeling trapped and isolated, like they are blaming you for someone else's bad behaviors, this person that is meant to care for you. Actions DO cause hurt, you/I aren't the one who caused the action. It's NOT on you. They need to stop putting it on us. And show support. All my training of greyrocking and proper responses goes out the window and left feeling like your going crazy... doesn't help either.

[@KaysHealthFix]

@dillp2267 constant dealing of these emotions causes physical manifestation in health as well. Stress and fight or flight mode is trauma. When you don't feel safe to share things, because it's not a safe space for you. This stress of cortisol levels constantly up, is taxing on the adrenals which can make you tired all the time, and other health issues.... you start shutting down mentally and freezing up, getting anxiety for no good reason, especially when it's not normal for you to be... the STRESS causes health issues to exasperated. A friend when she finally left her partner/narcissist - noticed health improvement after this. It's hard when you love someone and they are really good to you for the most part. They have the best of intentions, seeking a professional is important I believe. Confide in a friend? But a professional, first with you, then together, is needed for a safe space to talk about these things together, with a balanced perspective confirmed by someone else, to break it down for you both.

[@mn9120]

Thank you, I needed to hear this. 🙏☺

[@shars.555]

I am wishing you to reach 1 million subscribers. These are great videos! Thank you. 🎉❤

[@zzmsong]

Man, you are too good. Forward every video to my bf

[@ashdoux8661]

This is epic Jimmy. Succinct and to the point. If you dropped a new book, that’d be my holy gospel - no doubt.

[@melauneecoleman6157]

😳 Yes, Yes, Yes! Keep 'em coming Jimmy.

[@meganjohnson9540]

I love your content and I am super impressed by your plants. Respect, sir.

[@Inka-nt3rc]

By the way: Thanks for your content. It's eye-opening!

[@RavnThor]

This is soooo good, #Jimmy!!!! ❤

[@sayusayme7729]

Love your channel and all its content. Hopeful we ca all learn these essential skills, a part of life, living & giving

[@sabelanieto7391]

Your videos are gold

[@erica.142]

Absolutely awesome

[@lilfairycupcake]

the first rule of apology is, dont put yourself into the position to apologize in the first place. think, before you, speak and act.

[@chinh101]

That is great!

[@GodHelpMe369]

I am The Song Of the Universe! Today is a Miraculous Wonderfully Magical Day! I am in my New Earth Divine Crystalline Body!

[@suzanadsuza4819]

Thank You !

[@caramelpeacock5250]

Thank you for each and every one of your videos, Jimmy. ❤ I'm in desperate need of help, I don't know what to do. They blow up at me but refuse to explain what exacly I said wrong. I have about five seconds to guess which thing to say to deescalate before I get a hurtful comparison to their past hurts done by others ("I've been through this shit before") or they ask to forget about the whole thing. I'm constantly confused, and I can't apologize if they refuse to keep trying to explain till I understand. I want nothing more than to make it work. But we're hurting each other even though the only thing we want is for each other to be happy. Has anyone experienced anything remotely similar?.. All I want to do is cry.

[@kristentt]

Best apology is changed behavior. I wish :**( I have a husband who will say one thing when we are normal (like being so sorry he broke trust for lying again). And when he is mad at me, I'm over reacting, his lies were not that bad, and it is my fault that he lies and hides things. Wrong, outside of an argument, becomes right to him when he is mad. It is infuriating. He acknowledges everything post argument, but refuses to work on things when in an argument. I cannot handle it anymore. We have been separated for 3.5 weeks, bc he lied and hid stuff...theb turned tables on me, saying I'm the problem. 😢

[@MadisonEstes]

To be fair, while in a heated argument, emotions are high and people get defensive. I would advise you to just take a breather for an hour when you argue and come back when you are both more calm to discuss things when you both feel less defensive. The fact he can admit his mistakes when not overly emotional due to a fight is still pretty big, more than any guy I've dated anyway. As long as he doesn't cheat and can admit he made a mistake, he seems pretty decent to me. Unless his lies are about cheating, then I think you might want to let go.

[@lilacsilverwing]

@@MadisonEstesit doesn’t need to be cheating to be a thousand little cuts of betrayal

[@lauralafauve5520]

#MedicareForAll Medicaid doesn't pay for couples or marriage counseling. Let's make it easier for people who want help to get it.

[@edenalicerosebelovedchildo5958]

Yes, and with an epidemic of mental illness all across the globe, mental wellness should be a top priority everywhere.

[@aking3624]

Wow... She was worth doing the job for free & training her replacement but not be told in person she wasent being given the promotion!!!🤬

[@MonogoMango]

I'm waiting for an apology.

[@budnspud]

Can you talk about how to deal with a difficult divorce?

[@stoneyvowell1239]

I completely understand the understanding part, but still don't think the apology for something not done is not needed. The understanding part is the most important. The apology part is just to appease their control issues and can be very damaging to ourselves.

[@Lexi_Con]

Jimmy, Do you have any brothers or cousins or single friends you can set me up with? 😉 Because idk where to find a rare treasure like you.😊 Everyone thinks they're much more mature than they really are...

[@einMaedcheneben]

Hey Jimmy, can you do a video about how to treat a partner that is depressed, and playing videogames instead of looking for a job? he lost his job three years ago due to an accident and on top of our relationship being tormented by the fact that we live with his mother (and his father) he does nothing at all, neither fix our relationship nor look for a job. I dont know what to do. I tell him that I help him find a job but I dont want to do it FOR him, as he should know himself what he wants and how he gets there and not depend on me. I feel the more I help him the more dependend he becomes and the less I help the less he does.

[@lilacsilverwing]

He gets professional help and you get busy with your own things. If he doesn’t, you plan to support yourself. If you love him, you let him know if he’s getting help and/or whatever YOU know will give him traction - and the relationship stability- but you must take care of yourself. If he can’t take care of himself he clearly can’t show up for you either.

[@Inka-nt3rc]

Hi Jimmy, the first video I saw from you was kind of a list which consists "a man always treats you the way he is feeling about you" and some other points like "a man never derserves a second chance" and at the end your saying "you're enough, you're the right package, you're only at the wrong address" or something in that way. I was searching for a long while because I really want to send it to a friend but can't find it. Can you help me? It plopped up at pinterest... Would be great to watch it again and send it to a friend of mine (nor boyfriend or husband, don't have anymore). I just broke up because of very low interest in being kind to me, me feeling safe etc. Still working to learn how to set boundaries earlier, right at the beginning.

[@poopenlicht6448]

What is someone doesn't say the words ''I'm sorry' but instead uses positive actions to apologize? ie. Cuddles and kisses you, brings you food, etc.

[@user-on2dc6bs6n]

Any advice on a disagreement i had with my husband. He quit his job than told me. I feel like the trust is broken. He did not discuss this action of leaving with me.

[@edenalicerosebelovedchildo5958]

Repair Steps that i have learned. I think this helps people from being in a one down or a one up position. 1. Timing 2. Listen to the effect that it had on the other person 3. Acknowledge the effect 4. Apologize 5. Ask if there is anything else the person needs from you at this time 6. Open Door - Let them know that you are open to having additional conversations about this in the future.

[@StephenPuddicombe1]

Thank you. Please elaborate on step 1. Timing This definitely has an effect on how the apology is received.

[@sabrinakyng]

What happens when they say the right script, but their demeanor is still defensive? Arms crossed, eyes hard, tone terse... Like they know what they're supposed to say, but the genuine remorse part feels... Disingenuous

[@senoriessamusic]

What if my partner dont want just an apology but demands monetary compensation from his decision as a consequence of our mistake?

[@catcolb11]

❤❤

[@karenhall2926]

My husband won’t apologize he tells me if I say something that bothers me he says I’m playing the victim

[@dulceyprocaz]

Spit or swallow, My dear...

[@tnt01]

is he a narc?

[@carolynstewart8465]

❤❤❤❤❤

[@barbarasanta2454]

I love my husband of 35 years. Am I obligated to support his actions when I don’t agree with them? He’ has an assertive manner, which is not usually our problem. Sometimes his assertive energy escalates a situation ( in my opinion) with me or someone else. I can see someone else thinking is no longer assertive but aggressive. If I point that out, he’s terribly hurt by it and will tell me I don’t support him. We’re stuck! Any ideas? Thank you.

[@benjaminschlufter9823]

When is the best time for this kind of emotional stuff to happen? Cuz it seems a lot that the woman i date, like me a lot more when i dont bring up my insecurities. but when i dont bring them up, i cant really fall in love with them, since i dont now if i can trust them to take my emotions seriously...but i get that its kinda ecpected from men to not get emotionally to fast.

[@OLBICHL]

but all this only works on a rational level... if everything you do, big or small, is reason for another apologetic conversation... then the problem is rooted deeper

[@user-cl5vk2ug4i]

👍🏻

[@gorpazorp7309]

Weird to point out that this one isn’t about gender when gender is something we made up and doesn’t actually have all that much to do with your mental development if at all.

[@Jess-wk5jo]

I have serious questions about affairs 1 If i was dating Morgan i starting seeing my ex boyfriend Stephen start to make emotional attachment to Stephen i when i know him from school to college by texting him and meeting up and talking to Stephen on phone and thinking about him and watching films with him without never never having no sex ? Is it emotional cheating Ps me and stephen are ex boyfriend and girlfriend we got history can that cause emotional affair to happen. 2 can i have affair without ever ever having no sex i am not interested sex at all.

[@purrrrrrrple]

Ofc you should talk to a therapist to unriddle what all of this means to you w someone that's prepared for it, but me personally, I like to ask myself this when I question my actions, and in general when I'm trying to be empathetic. "Would I be ok w it?". Would you like your bf to have an ex as bestie and they hang out and he thinks about her all the time, and is having romantic toughts about her?

[@ancaioanastoica5884]

Yes I consider that an emotional affair Doesn't have to be purely physical for it to be cheating.

[@lilacsilverwing]

If you have to hide it from your partner, it’s your first sign

[@AlexanderHamilton-he3rj]

Hallelujah!!! I’m the favorite, $60,000 every week! Now I can afford anything and also support the work of God and the church.

[@RyanHall-qm2ye]

Oh really? Tell me more!

[@AlexanderHamilton-he3rj]

This is what Ana Graciela Blackwelder does, she has changed my life.

[@AlexanderHamilton-he3rj]

After raising up to 60k trading with her, I bought a new house and car here in the US and also paid for my son’s (Oscar) surgery. Glory to God.shalom.

[@GeorgeWashington-pc4qq]

I know Ana Graciela Blackwelder, and I have also had success...

[@GeorgeWashington-pc4qq]

Absolutely! I have heard stories of people who started with little or no knowledge but managed to emerge victorious thanks to Ana Graciela Blackwelder.

[@user-kj3mw4hr9r]

“Sorry I cheated on you, I didn’t realize I could have prevented this, but good news babe I can totally monetize it and become a relationship expert on yt!” Is that how I apologize? Learning from the best!

[@StephenPuddicombe1]

LOL, love the monetized part 😂

[@sovereign_soul_starseed]

Do people like this really exist in the world? lol

[@MicheleEngel]

Yes. And most of them are women.

[@karenhall2926]

It’ll never happen for me

[@Daysgobye52]

Me either. My husband doesn't ever feel he's to blame. I get the silent treatment usually and he knows that hurts. When he sees me cry, he walks away and shuts the door. I've stopped trying and even caring at this point.

[@aperta7525]

I expect the same for myself. Have to recover and rebuild myself anyway.

[@TheRiannaMarie]

Do people actually do this, is this real? lol I wish

[@StephenPuddicombe1]

Believe it or not yes. I just used this method to apologize to my ex. She accepted the apology but I'm still single...

[@jennasmith5313]

Is that even the right why to apologize? Did you know I dated the autism man and he never apologized for anything he did wrong

[@GodHelpMe369]

MY SOUL IS RAPED HAS BEEN MY WHOLE LIFE 44 YEARS OF HELL AND SUFFERING NO ESCAPE

[@aperta7525]

Praying for you 🙏🏻

[@s1n4m1n]

You currently have 434 videos on relationships. If that is the amount of information a person needs to have a good relationship, it may not be worth the effort.

[@hmoto7108]

Appears you don't even know the difference between gender & sex! Massive fail 🙄