Single Women By Choice Came All out To Talk About How Happy They Are Without A Man

[@MsCremant]

"Cat ladies had it right all along."

[@tsonofjohnson489]

hahahahahaha

[@melrosereality2866]

😂😂

[@enlightenedone7083]

I actually think "working on myself" all these years has made my dating pool even smaller. Bc I recognize toxic dysfunctional people very quickly and promptly exit. Protect your peace.

[@CordeliaWagner]

🎯🎯🎯 Imagine how great life would be if every good person would keep toxic people out of their private lifes and companies!

[@patriciasamanthaifill1715]

❤❤❤👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽

[@MrsTruthTeller]

Yep! It’s funny how everyone assumes that working on yourself will help you find a good man. When really, it actually makes you too good to date most men 😂😂. I hate to talk bad about other women but I’m noticing that the majority of women in long marriages are actually codependent women with no boundaries, low expectations, low standards and low self esteem. Women with no identities outside of being a wife and mother. The smartest women really are single the longest.

[@libfuzzy4629]

Yep!!!

[@melrosereality2866]

Yes

[@kirstylyons6328]

I have never had a problem getting a BF getting rid of them when it's clear that it's not going anywhere is the hard work. Alot of men don't really even like wemon but won't let go because they rather be with anybody than alone 😐

[@Ourown311]

Yep and that's the real issue

[@mebe8877]

I have noticed this exact thing whenever I tried to leave previous relationships.These mojos never want to let go , I had to block em so they can't reach out anymore because they want reasons and why I no longer wanted the relationship.

[@MeMyselfandEye127]

@@mebe8877 but isn't that the mature thing to do is explain why you want out? once you get in a relationship it's another person's feelings you have to take in account not just your own... just leaving and blocking is wrong and quite childish tbh and hurtful especially if he had feelings for you even if it wasn't working anymore.

[@Jenjenn1111]

Yes, the longer I am single…the more I realize I don’t need or want a man (unless he makes my life better). Otherwise, I’m good focusing on me and my money…bills paid, peace, stability, not worried about being cheated on, disrespected, or STDs. I’m good!

[@chocolatesugar4434]

Why is every single woman in these clips are glowing and are so calm and chill…..🤔🙌🏾❤️

[@LukeRev480]

Like where is that angry lonely sad single woman that society keeps talking about?

[@gjinkalla23]

​@@LukeRev480❤

[@Nwakaego_]

Because they aren’t dealing with anyone’s dusty evil ass son!😂 I LOVE this revolution for us women.🙌🏿😌✨🥰

[@Ourown311]

Because they don't have a man or anyone draining their energy.

[@Ourown311]

​@@LukeRev480that spirit is on the men. They want women to transfer that demon onto. It's so sad.

[@Childfree334]

I am single, but I do have a boyfriend. We have a LAT relationship because I REFUSE to have a man living under my roof ever again (I was married from 1994-2001, divorced because I didn't want kids). The expectations and emotional labor are just not worth it. I learned a long time ago that even the most independent and self-sufficient minded men instantly change into grown toddlers once they start living with a woman. All of a sudden, they can't and won't do anything for themselves. I'm not taking that chance ever again. I go back and forth to his house on the weekends to spend time together (he buys all the food, I cook), we date (he pays), we go on trips (we split the cost), and we both have our needs for companionship and intimacy met with none of the drama. I love having my beautiful home all to myself with no noise and no mess. Everything stays where I put it and best of all, never any piss on or around my toilet seats. 😂😂 I have an excellent female house sitter for when I travel. I'm good.

[@gekeithakeaton989]

Congratulations 🎉🍾🎊! I’ve been single for 13 years and have never been happier!

[@TheMichelex20]

Now THIS is my dream life if I possibly meet someone. But not actively considering dating. But if I do in the future this is bliss.

[@pileshongwe7827]

Now this is the dream life if I meet a deserving partner that’s the life I want to have own house , own space

[@marlyd]

I have a boyfriend too, we don't want to marry, have kids or cohabitate. I own my own studio app in a city and he wants to buy a tiny house somewhere in the woods. It works really well.

[@vonnii1013]

Ohhh I wanted this set up but what I have found is too many men use your independence as a excuse to cheat or mess around.....I am happy that u have that...I know it's sweet lls bravo

[@Liz-wz8dh]

This is probably true. The last guy I dated was super disappointed that I didn't mind being single again if we didn't work out. He seemed weirdly intimidated by the fact that I didn't consider being single a horrible thing. His stupid games also didn't work for the same reason.

[@Ourown311]

Wow it's like they do know how to do anything else.

[@genevieveaniko6492]

Anyone who is comfortable being single is automatically immune to toxic and dysfunctional people... Letting them and their problematic drama go, is a blessing and a exercise in self mastery. 🤷‍♀️

[@ineedhoez]

The reason why is because being afraid of being alone is the cause of codependency aka self love deficit disorder. When you are codependent, you overcontribute love, care, and respect and to relationships. Your needs are not met by your partner. You stay because of your fear of being alone. If you are not afraid of being alone, you completely eliminate the root cause of being in a dysfunctional relationship. They literally have no power.

[@RachelLondon]

I'm sitting here with dim lights, candles with soft music. I love single life. Rubbing my feet together with glee ❤

[@monicagomez4616]

😅

[@livprimitive]

Samesies!!! 🥲💕🥰

[@hilaireyoung1117]

As I'm rubbing my feet together! 😂Amen!🙌🏾

[@Yasminescookingshow]

Your comment made me smile from the depth of my soul. I too give myself foot rubs all the time.

[@bridgettebianca2318]

🏆🤗❤❤❤🤗🏆

[@blackcherry07]

I was the happiest when I was single with a job . now being with a man I feel like there’s a heavy fog over me .

[@xxxlegend6810]

Aw dear😢

[@Raddiebaddie]

Hes not worth it ✨🫶

[@yudollia]

Lmfaooo! This comment is sending me girl

[@sammich-lp2qm]

Girl, he’s an energy vampire and you’re a placeholder. He’s not going to marry you. He’ll turn you into a baby momma. Leave bisssshhh

[@mmirand80]

Not worth it. Life is too short to be miserable.

[@Brandy205]

I love being single. I’m responsible for 1 person and that person’s wellbeing. I date myself. I buy myself things I enjoy. I cook if/when I want. I travel without worrying about having to buy a second ticket. I don’t have anyone to answer to or argue with. I’m never going back to relationships. 😂

[@solomoon3083]

🙌

[@CordeliaWagner]

🥳🍾🦄🌺💝🎉

[@kinyettaalfred9657]

Facts

[@somebloke5565]

Hurt people encourage hurt people. No less sad, these comments read like men's attempt to justify the stupid MGTOW/ Incel script. Snap out of it, time is not on your side; old and alone is not a good look.

[@lisar.271]

PREEEEEACH!!!!! 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼

[@Grahh777]

This comment section is LIFE 🎉 I'm single by choice and so happy to see other women thriving.

[@cosymedia2257]

Yeah, it's heartbreaking to see women stuck by the "I need a man idea" I'm single since 97 and I love it... One day a colleague told me "it's shameful to be single" I asked why, since I'm fine with that? He actually had nothing to back up his claim (of course he is not a woman to begin with...). The funny thing was that I/We've seen him cheat on his wife with a coworker (with no shame if not pride somehow; he even had lunch with her with one of his 5 kids) and we all went "WTF" looking at each other (knowing all that) when this man actually bashed all this generation new meeting apps, mainly one being specific for cheaters because it pushes to and makes it easier to cheat - LOL - nobody even cared to call him on his paradoxical and limited mind - obviously he just needed a coworker for that matter - it's not the app dude!).

[@Grahh777]

@@cosymedia2257 the hypocrisy 🤣 and this man was trying to shame you lmao! Boy bye

[@cosymedia2257]

@@Grahh777 Yep... LOL

[@itzTeTe]

“If you can’t be content by yourself you’ll lack the independence needed to survive in this world in general.” Just something my mom told me.

[@tarawalton6778]

WISDOM💢

[@dianaa3336]

WELL SAID!

[@bmoe4609]

Agreed

[@sg5720]

I’m married and nothing is wrong with NOT being married. I can’t believe how much people are STILL looking for validation from people. This has to be entertainment only cause hubby and I just laugh and shake our heads. What is wrong with doing what you want? I swear this is why hubby and I have no friends, we just could careless what others think. Being single is amazing and being married is amazing. BOTH can also be awful. Just do whatever you want to do. All a person like me would ask is, please do not blame anyone else for the decisions you make. You MUST take accountability for YOUR actions. If you can do that, your living blessed. Good luck people, life is short, and everything can’t be perfect all the time. 😌

[@HolisticManifesting]

Get off dating sites. You all have nothing in common with those men except for being single. (and they're often not even single). ❤

[@ineedhoez]

Yeah...

[@HowToBeAlone]

They’re so boring too! Always the same people, same conversations

[@eulabell4871]

Been single since 2001! The more I listen to these black men talk the more I feel secure in my decision to never marry. People are always shocked when I tell them I'm nearly 50! They be like, how? I raised my 4 kids as a single mother and left the added stress of a man behind. Because stress + stress= more stress. You subtract the man and bingo!

[@HolisticManifesting]

I always say thus, as a divorced mother. It's so easy now. ❤

[@akinazara]

Exactly it's just me and my 3 kids I don't need the extra stress

[@melrosereality2866]

Amen 🙏🏾 I left .. I love my kids but the men are so stressful

[@Dannniellleee]

The wrong man will ruin you and your life from the inside out if he wants, if you allow it. And he’ll start with your mind. DON’T give them chances just bc you think you’re being too judgmental- that’s your intuition and, in time, you’ll see it was right.

[@MK-hh1vo]

I'm so happy and thrilled that women are learning this lesson at a *younger* age! There's absolutely nothing wrong with being single and child free *for life* if that's how things work out! I'm single in my 60s and having the time of my life! I have plenty of women friends my age in the same boat. I was with my beloved partner for 14 years. Nine of those years were on again/off again hard work. In the last 5 years we finally got it right and made wonderful plans for a future together. Then he died of a heart attack. I no longer had the energy or desire to start over so I took my self "off the market". That was 2018. My life since has been full of friendships, hobbies, personal interests good times and just plain *fun* ! I cherished the time with my partner. Now I get to cherish time with myself. It's so relaxing and fulfilling. I wish knew the single life was so theraputic when I was a younger woman. Society is cruel to insist that women *must* get married and have children. There are better options out there! Enjoy getting to be your own person!

[@bunnybeetle1304]

The key for me was to change my thought process of “how can i make him like -or even notice- me?” into “do i like him?”

[@bunnybeetle1304]

Also if they cannot treat you better than a random stranger would, they’re not worth the time. Which has been my second big lesson.

[@lmn1516]

That's a game changer, along with having them compete with your peace rather than only having to be marginally better than the last guy.

[@triggered577]

Them: “You’ll be lonely with cats” Me: What makes you think you are more attractive than a cat? I don’t even like cats. But the prospect of dying alone surrounded by them is not a prospect I fear at all. Especially when it means that all my preceding years were free of stress, toxins, fatherless children, and the like

[@oOIIIMIIIOo]

They are projecting. They don't really care if you were lonely with cats. 😄

[@MichelleHell]

Fun fact, cats carry a non-toxic virus that is thought to change how humans perceive cats, making us like them more like children. It evolved with the natural domestication process of cats. At some point, we started REALLY liking cats. It's literally evolved into our biology to like cats.

[@Waitcanyouseemyhair]

I should start using your response! It's more concise than mine lol. I always respond "You can insult Reggie the cat all you want. But he's cute, loyal, likes to spend time with me, & comes home at night and has good hygiene. So if you ask me he's outpacing a lot you all's husbands already 😂"

[@roxy4325]

At least the cats won't give me BV! 🙄😒

[@solomoon3083]

Me. Unlonely with sacred creatures who keep dusty spirits away from me when I sleep. The second someone says something sideways about animals, I already know they aren’t worth a damn. Cats are spiritual protectors sis. ;)

[@janjanl1812]

Too busy enjoying life than to use my time on a man. I always thought that I can’t do much because I was always tired when I was in relationships. I suddenly realized that when I’m single, I can do so many things: to do dancing, kickboxing, painting, photography, blogging, learning new languages and pampering myself with massages and treats at restaurants. This is what life is all about. Not going back to relationships ever, it’s too tiring for me.

[@oOIIIMIIIOo]

Yes, it is exhausting.

[@xxxlegend6810]

I realised that too, not only with toxic partners, but also with toxic family members.

[@Ourown311]

They do drain your energy. I'm starting to think this is spell they put on women once they get involved with a man.

[@luking2644]

Same, girl. Keep livin' the life!

[@sherox414]

The longer your single U can better discern if a male is truly emotionally available or obsessive you’ll see ALL red flags…the fake charm..lol lol…I’m so HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY SINGLE….NO MORE GAMES FOR THIS QUEEN💯only Sad thing is too see my mother sister cousin aunt all chasing king baby’s down…lolo sad!!!

[@jungersrules]

My mom when she was alive, and now a friend of mine who is going through a divorce, both think that it's just their man who has issues. That most men are not like them. I tried telling my mom that my dad was a very typical man, but she would argue and say no, he's odd. Then, she would wonder why I wouldn't want to meet someone. And, my friend is already daydreaming about meeting a man who wants to cuddle and do things with her. I've known for a long time that these type of women, those who have been in a relationship for some time, have a harder time believing that a vast majority of men share some really unattractive qualities. They are in some sort of denial. So, I totally agree that the longer you are alone, not in a relationship with a man, you will see clearer.

[@redonyx5428]

the last time i was in a relationship i came to the realization that damn, this shit sucks. i just didn't have the energy for it because at the time my ex was just fucking draining. marriage isn't appealing to me and idgaf about having kids. i prefer being single because i like my own space. i like being able to do things or to check out events that a partner wouldnt like. I dont feel lonely because i have close friends and a community i can hang out with.

[@levelupgoddess9289]

Relationships have never been important to me. I realized earlier this year that I have been single 5 years now and it honestly feels more like a year. It hasn’t felt that long.😂😂😂 I have no interest in being in a relationship right now. I’m trying to finish my degree, get a career then get a home. Everything I have pictured in life, I have never pictured a man or a child being apart of that. I have ALWAYS loved being single.

[@HolisticManifesting]

It's beautiful to have that clarity. ❤

[@melrosereality2866]

Same

[@barefootedbougie]

Very true. Your decisions are not driven by dopamine or dopamine cravings. You also are not reacting from stress. Your mind is very sober and you see clearly. You don't want anyone ruining that peace and for me I made a promise to myself to never abandon myself ever again. My value is not in a man lusting after me.

[@ineedhoez]

So true. Codependency is an addiction. Being alone is like going through withdrawal. It hurts. It's like once you become addicted to a drug, you don't even get high anymore, you just take it so you don't feel bad. That's what people who have relationship addiction are like. They just have someone there so they're not alone and they don't have to feel bad. It doesn't matter if the person treats them like crap. Anything is better than being alone

[@sabrinascrochetdesigns]

Single life is the best life! I’m free from putting with men and their BS.. a lot of me out here is just depressing

[@melrosereality2866]

Extremely depressing

[@genevieveaniko6492]

Society is full of lies. We were basically raised to believe that singleness is a curse and that the answer to all your problems comes with attaching yourself to another individual... This is the biggest lie ever. In singleness you can heal, grow and become the best version of yourself and it's your responsibility to do the work. There isn't another person alive who is equipped to fix you or your internal issues... Take your drama to God instead.

[@amab1853]

Well said!!

[@camiba6773]

Single by choice here. I have never had the desire to want to be apart of a pair. I just can't even imagine myself with someone. I like where i am at now

[@VeeKayGreenerGrass]

I used those same words "I don't need to be part of a pair" when breaking up with my first boyfriend in my 20s... 😅

[@tamrayoung6045]

Same. I feel out of sorts when I'm paired. Hell, I remember feeling this way in kindergarten and 1st grade; I hated how we were paired and had to hold hands. I mean, I get why it's done, kids can go rogue without parameters, but I still disliked it.Thinking back, I believe that was starting point to why I am as I am 53 years later. I find comfort in being solo in the adventure called life.

[@raecoleman-wf2cp]

My grandmother used to tell me "you were NOT born a twin. You came here by yourself, and more than likely leaving here by yourself. You don't need to always be friends or in a relationship with someone 'just because '. " 💯

[@autumnl5127]

This is so true. I had that peace for about 5 yrs before allowing myself to try a relationship again. Before I knew it I was back in the same old cycle. Wanting to know why he is not answering his phone? Where is he? Why is he going in the bathroom with his phone, and all of the tricks and drama again. I blamed myself for allowing it to happen. I put a stop to it and he said that he knew that when he initially approached me that he would disturb my peace. He was clearly a male that hated women. I quietly stopped talking to him. I did not block his calls because I loved never responding to his calls and text messages. I was so happy that I never wanted to live under the same roof with him because it would have been hard to get away from him. 5 years later he still texts and calls at least a couple of times a month and I laugh each time. I have never answered any calls nor returned any texts from him😊. He obviously doesn't have many choices of women because he keeps circling back around to me. I plan on staying single and keeping my lovely peace as long as I live❤

[@raecoleman-wf2cp]

Girl...... you're not all the way healed, or you're waiting for a certain green light to take him back 🙄 when most women are done with a man, and KNOWS there's no get back she'll block him or change her number. There's no way in hell that my exes still have my number and I see them call on a daily. Hell naw. Just say you're in denial.

[@autumnl5127]

​@@raecoleman-wf2cp Your comment makes a lot of since. This is why it's good for us to look out for each other. Blocking done. Thank you❤

[@zi6803]

Girrrlll calling and texting someone for 5 years while never receiving a response is mental. Please stay safe, that is not normal. I hope he doesn't just show up in front of you house one day 😨

[@roxy4325]

​@@autumnl5127ATTA GIRL! yeah just reading your original comment I got FATIGUED just THINKING about getting my peace disturbed like that 😂

[@autumnl5127]

Thank you for your comments. I moved after the breakup and he doesn't know where I live. His number is blocked now❤. I love my returned peace and I'll never loose it again 😊

[@ForTheDivine_2000]

In Zulu we say "uphetheni esandleni?" This is translated to "what are you (man person) offering me?" Can't just have a man for the sake of having a man and yet he does nothing to improve or contribute to your life. Rather be alone than poorly surrounded

[@ms.divinesunshine]

Post divorce I was single for almost 3 years. I felt the most secure, enlightened, and emotionally intelligent than I ever felt in life! While still healing, I dated a man for 2 years the we were in a a so called relationship for barely a year an now I have more trauma than what I started with. All because of his unhealed trauma and insecurities. SMFH

[@LadyMarigoldWithers]

Single by choice here, keep getting attention from guys and just politely say ‘thank you but I’m not looking to date atm’. Was keen on a guy and I eventually asked him out but he said the same back to me lol. C’est la vie! I very rarely meet men I could picture a future with or have a similar vibe so I don’t mind shooting my shot when I do but there has literally been one in the last 4 years 😂 and I’m so much more at peace and less stressed than when I was ‘looking for’, dating or in relationships. Have learned so much about who I am and what my values/boundaries are in these last few years. It’s given me much more confidence which is probably why I’m getting more attention lately 😅. I still have a hope to meet ‘my person’ one day but I leave it in fate’s hands; online dating was too overwhelming and exhausting to want to try it again.

[@xxxlegend6810]

Yeah online dating sucks lol

[@zakariaabdi588]

The biggest fear for a man is a woman living alone. When u date someone make sure u don’t live with them to gain the upper hand. Men know they are disposable so they put parameters that imprison u towards them either by living with them with them being the sole owner of the house or by knocking u up.

[@melrosereality2866]

Whew!!! These are facts. I'm definitely adding this to my screenshots.

[@SylisDaGoldenPeach]

I’m glad I’m single I’m able to save money without worrying about a man tryna control me , I’m able to dress however I want , I actually have double D cup chest so every man I’ve dated had a problem with me wearing low cut shirts , I feel a man is insecure and weird if he acts that way , I’ll only change my dress code when I get married not just for a boyfriend

[@bzzzz...8383]

Why would you change the way you dress for your husband if you say a man is insecure if he doesn't approve of your style? Do you dress to attract men then? Why for husband and not for boyfriend? I just don't understand what exactly would be the reason of that change?

[@Liz-wz8dh]

Honestly even if you get married, it shouldn't matter if you dress that way. But you're right that a lot of these guys love trying to control women. Lots of deeply insecure men out there, particularly if they know they have a chick other men might want.

[@SylisDaGoldenPeach]

@@bzzzz...8383 because I didn’t make a vow to a boyfriend I made a vow to husband

[@janjanl1812]

You got it, you flaunt it, lady. It’s about feeling good about yourself. A husband has no business minding what you wear. If he tries to control, it just means he sees you as a property, not an individual.

[@SylisDaGoldenPeach]

@@Liz-wz8dh thank you sis this comment warmed my heart ❤ girl power !

[@edithart5753]

The lady in the yte shirt is exactly how i feel now. I see all the red flags clearer now and dont risk myself anymore. I refuse to be in a relationship i have to fight for, if they are not healthy nd making the relationship easy i dont want them.

[@christopherbrown5409]

Do you make relationships easy for men?

[@edithart5753]

@christopherbrown5409 no gaslighting here sir, your opinion doesn't matter nor do I owe you an explanation.

[@christopherbrown5409]

@edithart5753 how the hell is asking a question "gaslighting", where'd I express an opinion, and where'd I say anyone owed me an explanation (or anything else)? My point was that men can't be the only ones making relationships easy, dumbass (or easier, since even the best ones take real work.)

[@edithart5753]

@christopherbrown5409 omg my goodness you called me dumbass and then went right ahead to validate you trying to gaslight me. It's not easy trying to sound smart I can see

[@christopherbrown5409]

@@edithart5753 asking a Yes or No question and gaslighting are two different things. I'll ignore your English being as broken and awry as your mind.

[@heneverforesakesme4038]

this is true....Ladies...especially the young ladies...take your focus off trying to find someone and you will CLEARLY SEE...I dated a little gnome last year that was just turned out to be a horrible person. He just was and a big liar...anyways, I broke it off and took a six-month break, went out on a few dates and was just like: yeah....NO!! I just stood back and let them talk and watched, didn't engage with them mentality and definitely not physically and come to find out in just a short period of time, within a week...one was a coke head and the other a drunkard. Never dated again.

[@CordeliaWagner]

I am young. My self esteem us to high to date lower than 8.

[@user-ip5fm3ck4p]

Not little gnome 😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@turquesa_8056]

I was always told there is something wrong with me and I have some kind of issues. I really did think I was alone in the world and I am glad that I am not alone.

[@snwngl2261]

I feel dumb because I listened to other people when I was actually doing it right from the beginning 😅

[@HolisticManifesting]

Me too! I got married and had two kids because of it. But I do love my girls. Guess I couldn't have gotten them without the relationship. ❤

[@AG-iu9lv]

Same. I listened to my mother being sad that I was alone. Ugh the regrets are real.

[@snwngl2261]

@@AG-iu9lv yessss that's so truee, my mom is worried for me because "I might end up alone" lol. Mom, I WILL end up alone but I'll be fine. REALLY 🤣 I think the "good thing" is at least we have confirmed that we don't need to be with another person. Not at all ☺️

[@LadyDayK87]

Im so happy women are crushing the ideology that a woman's value or success is attached to having a man, or being married with children. Its true what the studies say, the happiest and most well adjusted population is the single woman without children.

[@Autumn-zd9nq]

I have had regrets for the relationships I gave too much in. I haven’t had any regrets being single.

[@Avocadocat-qo2tb]

What do men give that we need

[@sandycheeks1580]

Nothing! Nothing but Slavery with invisible chains ⛓️

[@akinazara]

Nothing , but stress and death

[@HHCF713]

Let me tell you, I’m happy not having to have my peace disturbed. Just as long as I can take care of myself, I’m good!

[@peachesandpoets]

Honestly my life is so beautiful

[@ELIZABETHTORRES-em3kx]

lol one of my besties been with her man 7 years they not even live together 😂he rolls his eyes at her all the time. lol she was laughing at me bc I’m been alone 5

[@VeeKayGreenerGrass]

Both being single/with yourself and being in a relationship can be good. I've done both and the best time of my life was the 12 years I wasn't in a relationship. I made more money, I travelled and got fitter. That said, if you want a good quality relationship, be the kind of partner you would want to be with. Make a list and cultivate the qualities you list in yourself. Enjoy!🎉

[@bridgettebianca2318]

Single as a Dollar Bill..No stress, No worries, Full of Peace, Love and Light..Bills Paid, Fridge Full, Clean Blankey, Healthy Hobbies, Self Esteem on Fleek😘

[@monimuppet6132]

This one is me, all day. I got married, had a kid, and divorced by 27 and I've been single since. I'm coming up on 17 years and I'm still surprised by how long it's been because I've simply been living. I have experienced almost everything these ladies described; the lower rate of male attention, the weighing the price of what I'd have to give up against what I'd potentially gain, the fear of losing myself trying keep my partner loving me (like I nearly did when I was married), and just not being enticed by anyone I've met. My daughter is nearly grown and we are very comfortable with each other. I have a 20+ year friendship that I have grown by and provides me with genuine and loving intimacy. I have close and healthy family relationships. And when I have lonely periods, my mind starts thinking of the space I'd have to make in my world and, suddenly, lonely period has passed and it's back to life 😂. I'm just too content, too comfortable, and I only get more so every year that passes. I still have a heart and mind for romance but I have no reason to hold my breath for it. If it comes, it comes. I'm good either way.😊

[@victoriatilghman628]

and I’m loving it ., I’m asked a few times for marriage and I’m 71 now ., but refuse to give up my freedom and peace ., 30 years now ., no drama 🎭 not dating

[@akinazara]

I've been single by choice, and what ended it with me was a male friend who disrespected me - im so greatful to choose me and focus on me , myself , and I

[@txspacemom765]

Married almost 20 years. 2 years out, post divorce, and my quality of life has exponentially grown, spiritually, financially, mentally, health wise...easily 1000000%. It's been incredible. And I am near my 50's and all these men have is, when I say my peace at all costs, is I am old and will be lonely with my cats. Honey, I was doing that at 25, try again. LOL It is so nice to finally move through life unbothered. And my true success, I am on fire!

[@whitepearls20]

I have been single for over 2 years after a 7 year toxic relationship. I have only just decided to stop searching for a partner about 5 months ago after meeting over 10 men who wanted to be with me but I just did not feel they were good enough for several reasons. I am now committed to enjoying my singleness even if I recently clocked 30, because meeting men who aren’t good enough to commit to, is exhausting and disappointing.

[@LadyDayK87]

I used to get annoyed and confused whenever a man would say things like, "You have a house, a career, and a nice car. Youre ok with being single...you don't need a man!" Huh?! Now I understand it to mean that there is no angle he can use to rope me in and make me dependent on so that I wont leave once he starts "acting up" such as, pulling away emotionally, physically, or not keeping promises. It will be extremely hard to manipulate me because there are no carrots to dangle to get me to chase after him and the relationship. Of course 'love' can be an option to rope an independent confident woman but that takes waaay more effort and time to pull off and again this type of woman has boundaries so although it starts out as a fun challenge for manipulative men, they will abort the mission if the woman shows that she will not chase him for love and attention. So he will either ghost her or outright reject her to try to at least cause some pain since he knows she wouldnt put up with him long enough for him to really play games to devastate her.

[@vernetta111]

Single by choice here too im tired of games I love my peace my journey that I'm on rn and pouring all the love I've poured into dustys back into myself and it feels so good learning languages, reading books, having clarity and no stress is priceless ❤ I wish I had done it sooner

[@nikkilong7377]

Im 2 year in to being a widow. Everytime I think about dating I hear men speak and I pour a glass of wine or go chill with my kids. Or work. I have a little crush on a guy but I am allowing what it is to be. I won't try to force it into anything. When I was married I would always say my husband is my oldest child. I enjoyed a good part of our time together but the rest I am looking at as lessons and I am growing from it. Had I heard all of this before we got married I would have paid attention to those flags.

[@HowToBeAlone]

I promised myself my last boyfriend would be the final relationship. When I left him I felt so free. I’m now dedicated to my work and spiritual growth. Couldn’t be happier

[@PrayerOfMannesah]

Yeah I just bought a towel home in California and my moving day is this month I'm single and I have never been happier I got a backyard I got a beautiful view of the Bay and I'm talking about a good area next to San Francisco State University I'm done with the stupidity you don't like me so what I no longer care when I was younger I wish I had this advice I would have not sacrificed so much especially for nothing I got nothing in return only getting relationships that mean things❤

[@Mel-tw6qv]

I bought my home at a young age by myself in ca. I promise you, you can do a ton of repairs and updates yourself. I try my hardest to do everything I can by myself. There is not even a need to hire a handyman unless you literally cannot lift something or something truly needs a greater level of expertise. Enjoy your new home!

[@luvlybeauty85]

This is real I’m single by choice. At one time I wanted a relationship and was not being treated well by the ones I wanted to be with. Being single taught me to love myself way more now that I found self love the ones that didn’t treat me well want to tell me how much they miss me and want to have something with me. Now that I found myself I don’t really want a relationship I feel it’s too much pressure. I’m happier being in no relationship than I ever was when I was in one.

[@sg5720]

Really though. Does anyone really just want to be single? I understand the social people who have plenty friends, but what about the not so social person - are they really wanting to be single? Then you have the workaholic, does he or she really want to be single? Not eveyone is bold and loud and confident etc. Maybe the person you want just has not crossed your path yet, and your content with where you are so you label it “single by choice”, why not just say “I’m happy right now”? I like to look at it from all angles. All I know is humans are never meant to be alone- even religions around the world teaches that. 😌

[@luvlybeauty85]

@@sg5720 everyone don’t crave to be with someone it’s not a need it’s a want. Yes I’m single by choice, if I wanted someone I could be in a relationship I chose to not have one. If people would look for internal love it wouldn’t be a need to look for it outwardly. I speak for me I can’t live for everyone else. Be happy with self first have a good day.

[@akferren1]

I’ve been married 3 times and I discovered I feel happiest when I’m alone..I’m 53 now and I’ve been single for ten years and I enjoy my peace and solitude so much I don’t think I’ll ever date again

[@Madelena714]

Been single the majority of the last 15 yrs by choice. 34 yrs old single parent full custody and loving it! I’m happy. I love having control of my life & my peace. O g so true why do men think it’s okay to ask women what’s wrong with me? Or ask who broke up with who in my last relationship? Or ask me if I was the problem? The audacity and entitlement men have to ask literally anything without thinking it’s inappropriate or anything good can grow between us after asking that? Seriously after asking me that it’s already over. I’ve lost interest. I’ve been in a few dates with single men with kids and they always seem to resent me for having full custody and treat me like shit or have some shitty remark or lack empathy. They act like every separated case is the same so they instantly want to side with a man they know nothing about.

[@rcmurphy5986]

Yes, this video is so important. It’s a long road to realizing that you’ll be perfectly ok without a guy. When you realize that, your standards raise drastically and you’ll be a whole lot choosier about who you spend time with. It’s an amazing change of perspective! It’s a way worse situation to end up with the wrong person than it is to end up alone. Way worse.

[@antriciaking3422]

Living alone is peaceful I love it praise God

[@SkycometAnimeVamp]

I’m new to the whole De-Centering men thing, so I appreciate any advice I get from y’all. I used to be a bit of a pick me girl, then I reached the breaking point when a Hinge date didn’t understand, “no. I don’t sleep with men on the first date” after my ex had just left me for another woman when a month earlier he said he loved me. I’m done. I deserve better than men who disrespect, g@slight and ghost me.

[@kenyanikkiicampbell5628]

You realize how much you gave of yourself.

[@CordeliaWagner]

The loneliness epedemic comes mostly from Narcicissts who got exposed and can't find new victims and people who lack social skills but aren't willing to work on themselves. And it's men who are wayyyy less willing to work on themselves aside from saying "yo I gonna be rick with Crypto!" I don't believe the "men and women need each other" nonsense. I need friends and my own place and my own miney. A hot interesting funny guy is nice but not necessary. And looking around in Real Life: Dating is to much work. Meeting naturally over a hobby is a great thing and falling in love organically is beautiful but I HATE it when guy,s say they want a girlfriend. They don't want me, they just want what they can get from me. I instantly pull back because these guys come across as needy and weak and have the Red Flags if " 🚩🚩🚩Covert Narcicisst 🚩🚩🚩!!!!" all over them. I don't believe in "giving a man a chance". That ends deadly for to many women.

[@ineedhoez]

Don't do anything for them. That is a really good way to make sure you end up with a generous giver type. Be a taker!

[@nioka3436]

Hi Maria, that secons siter hit the nail on the head. Single AF 4eva if that's my destiny, peace is priceless.✌🏾💕

[@sangomoon5456]

This was very relatable.

[@Chosenaire]

I am so excited about my healing and growth. I am so proud of myself for doing the heavy lifting.

[@BambiLena666]

As someone who has been single by choice for years, I do understand your friend to an extent. Being single by choice at 35 means its pretty hard to find anyone to do things with you. Most of my friends have kids, or have been moving around or are married or simply have other things going on in their life. I think this is an important part of the current single womens experience to talk about and be honest about. I am generally very comfortable being alone (have been since I was a kid) but still sometimes it would be nice to have someone to go with you for a walk randomly. My friend with 2 kids that lives a 20minute drive away from me certainly wont go on a walk or a quick coffee. Trying to organise with someone to go to this brazilian pastry place I wanted to try takes ages. And while going places alone is great as well, its nice having someone there with you sometimes and especially if its something you've been putting off. Like theres a lot less of a chance youre gonna be trying to organise a meet up with your friend so they can come with you to buy a pan you have been putting off cause you dont feel like going there. And theres something to be said to have someone else there whenever you need to deal with random family functions. That being said these situations clearly arent enough all the other things lol but they do exist. I will also say these things do get smaller as well as your friends kids start getting bigger and more independent.

[@pla4825]

I’m not against relationships it I’m not desperate to be in one either. I’m 37 never been married no kids either ultimately I want to be happy, freedom and my peace of mind

[@KathleenFulton-u1x]

The men say that if we are not with them, we will be old and lonely with cats. If we are with them, they will cheat on us, we will get divorced, then we will be with our cats, anyway. So we just skip the ugly part about being with them and go straight to the cats.

[@MsSecretlady]

WORD

[@tynaangelici3023]

This is the realization I’m coming to.

[@PassionateFlower]

Omg this channel is SO much better than the Sex and Love Addicts anonymous meetings I used to force myself to go to! Thank you!😩🙏

[@Jenna-vj2ju]

As a young woman, I love this channel. Good job, sis💗

[@MariaDavids]

Awesome! Thank you!

[@tynaangelici3023]

I’m so done with these modern grown boys.

[@lexa_power]

I relate to both people you mentioned. I would identify as a sad ex wife because i didn’t want my marriage to end. But now i have been single long enough that i identify with it. And i don’t fight. So i identify with the single by choice women because i have really enjoyed my life. I love going on solo cruises and solo travel and it’s so fun to do whatever i want and there’s always someone to talk to wherever you go 🚢🥂

[@ajlocs2361]

Chile…this is so true! Single for 9 years. I am a homebody introvert Honey and I love it! Peace no damn man drama!

[@summermarie5626]

Honestly, after 25 yrs of dating I'm no longer rage filled, I'm just bored. The thought of dating bores me. I can't sit in front of some mediocre man with too much cologne or no effort put into his appearance at all, watching him play the same games that they played in my 20s, just lying obviously about their entire personality. This is why they pressure women to get married before 30 because after 30 you start to realize that men don't grow. They don't evolve in any way. They are the same man they were when they were 25. I would much rather finish my work day, have a nice meal while I watch some skincare and makeup videos with a cocktail, have a relaxing bath, do my skincare routine, have a gummy and a toke with a night cap and go to bed without being bothered.

[@zippi771]

What is a toke?

[@Latence]

Younger I used to be like ' wow she has been chosen by a man! what can't I see ?? what don't I have ? " I used to be told everyday I was beautiful until I understood it was a long term devilish tactics'. no one was choosing me. I came to read a book called "smarter than the devil". The set traps made me realize I had to prison break. Girls know you have all you need. Everything could come extra.

[@davitatukura2520]

Hmm 🤔 this is interesting. I've actually been thinking about it. I'm beginning to desire being single like I mean no dating nor involvement with men for some time- just for a period of time- and see the difference. Because right now, I'm actually getting tired of the whole relationship thing right now 😅

[@iiwii3380]

I love this for women❤

[@Theseanple]

Single for the first time at 28 and I decided to just focus on myself after a really bad breakup. I’m focusing on my career, side hustle, eating healthy and general self improvement. Some guys have approached me but I’m so picky now because I believe I’ve had experience and can identified flags quickly. I love being alone now and as an introvert this is not an issue. Cut off friends who are not like minded and it’s so peaceful here 😁. I recommend singleness 😂

[@DWPersianExcursion]

Love and support ❤❤

[@Listening_Books12345]

Due to pretty early trauma I was legit scared of boys/men for a long time, and even after starting that healing process, I don't seem to stand out to, or attract the attention of many men, even when I felt like I craved that attention. To that end I've basically always been single, and I feel 10:47 so hard. I have basically married myself at this point because I just am not impressed by other people, men in particular. And I think they can tell how unimpressed I am, because I am not a confident, loud or aggressive personality but some men have been legit intimidated by me. Like, I'm the one pathologically afraid of y'all, and you think I'm the scary one? But I think this is a factor in what I do and don't attract.

[@nanilo8786]

Being a girlfriend is tiring and depressing.Romantic love is possessive. You love someone and then it's like being in prison: you have to explain yourself and make compromises all the time. Congratulations to those who succeed, because this concept really sucks 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@sg5720]

Sometimes it works, sometimes it don’t. Everything ain’t for everybody. 🤷🏽‍♀️😌

[@ineedhoez]

You don't have to do that. You can just pick someone that allows you to do you.

[@MicahMulindwa]

I totally agree. I get more done when I am alone. For me I have decided to dedicate my life to 1. Taking care of myself 2. Enjoyinh life....because life is not all about wedding bells and sex 3. Living a purposeful life. Giving to society and working on my spiritual life. I am okay by myself and I am choosing to be single and happy. Happiness is a choice it's not a destination.

[@92Jojo]

I enjoyed watching your video. Healing is so important.....I think we need to come more to Jesus and pray for our coming relationships, before entering a new relationship.

[@lisasimpson8895]

thid lady... if you look for the definition of wisdom, you'll find a picture of her haha. it is soooo trueeee!!! the longer you remain single, the longer you want to remain single - because you can spot the BS from a mile away.

[@sammich-lp2qm]

Married women do everything alone. They can barely have friend and have a very hard time getting dude to even do anything with her. He’s either too lazy or just doesn’t want to deal with you.

[@pincopallino8176]

That girl was right. But the difference between her and me: I never chased men to begin with. I saw clear from day one. A man can't make my life any better. I don't want to bash men, but I have simply no desires or needs a man could satisfy. So there is only work and hassle and no benefit.

[@Jenjenn1111]

I really like your channel….”All my single ladies!”

[@KL-gv1rk]

Women can do whatever they/we want… But; this is why population is plummeting! Men these days weren’t raised to take care of women either! The entire thing is just sad to me!

[@chirimeow]

There are 8 billion people on this planet. A drop in population is more beneficial than harmful.

[@AndyCroat-v6d]

Loved this, Maria! Thanks.

[@michelledavidson1781]

Yes. Being in a 25 year relationship with a covert narcissist, and how hard it was to leave. I now see everything about a man immediately simply because I'll never repeat the same mistake now that I know how difficult it is to break a trauma bond. It's not a joke. 99% of men are narcissistic. They all play the same mind games. Nothing is worth committing myself into the institution of marriage / relationship with them. It's a waste of time hoping each one will be different.

[@juniorleslie4804]

This is quite good, because as men get use to living without women, and become accustomed with it, then we will no longer need to reproduce and the population will collapse. Thank you ladies for the freedom. I never knew that I even needed it. It is much appreciated. Stay by yourself, I am single by default, not by choice and I have no woman and no cries or complaints. I have no excuses, and I no longer even care ladies about what you want. Good luck and enjoy your single lives.

[@dovi57]

I was abandoning myself so I would be chosen by a man…when I realized I am not happy with this guy, he does not want to change his bad habits, I thought- what is the point of it? And I became single. Still learning how to love and prioritize myself, but I already feel much better.

[@AsrielAsitgets]

I’ve been single by choice for about three years and loving it❤️✨ I am patiently waiting for THE right ONE😌 I’ve never had an issue with getting or keeping a “man” it just never works out in the end

[@AG-iu9lv]

I can't wait to be single

[@ineedhoez]

I have my blanky😂😂😂😂

[@arcanineryu]

Being a woman growing up in the world is so gaslighting. And we cant afford to overlook opportunities to pull back the curtain.

[@JP-km5hw]

Be careful with the whole “ I don’t want to die alone” notion because some people will treat you horrible when you are on your deathbed. It happened to a close relative of mine her “husband “ would not even sleep in the same room with her when she fell ill with a terminal illness it was very sad, just extremely neglectful

[@rachelreii5952]

It's true.

[@NatureChaser43]

Fabulous line. You’ll die alone with 40 cats. Me: what’s that any of your business if I choose to die along with 40 cats , because I chose them over you. 😅