Soft and Gentle Parenting Has Enabled Generation of Rude and Disrespectful Kids, w/ Dr. Leonard Sax

[@MegynKelly]

Subscribe to never miss an episode of The Megyn Kelly Show: bit.ly/3Aw93yw

[@She_McGee]

i just figured out what's wrong with canada's prime minister. he was taught to have self esteen and not humility!

I think my favorite was, "If you fall and break your arm, I'm not taking you to the hospital!" Like you, we were the opposite of "gentle parented." Of course, we knew we were loved unconditionally and that Mom/Dad was (probably) kidding.

[@MichelleMikey-el6pb]

Cheap labor = h1 visa immigrants Americans want high salaries with benefits and economic rights. H1 visa workers just want low pay to leave their awful countries by stealing American jobs Yes. Tech companies hire h1 visa immigrant workers because they are CHEAP LABOR and are beholden to their tech sponsors to work for little money and little benefits to do same job. $$$$$ profits$$$$$mobey$$$$$$$ is all tech ceo (Vivek and Elon) cares about. . Tech CEOs maximize profits$$ by hiring H1 visa immigrants from India. American workers know their economic rights so they get passed over while Indian workers h1 visa come in and take their jobs for less pay. ❤❤❤College grads are getting passed over for the H1 visa immigrants every day. Vivek and Elon have to go. Bye.

[@JackSmith-w1t]

Just finished reading ‘Raising Warriors: Preparing Your Children For a Godly Life’ and it really opened my eyes to some new ways of guiding my kids in their faith. Highly recommend it if you’re looking to strenghten your family’s spiritual life

[@dchrome52]

I've hired kids who've been victims of gentle parenting, and who are now victims of unemployment.

[@Fayegina]

It’s so crazy!

[@lewiscarey1593]

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@karylmorgan7320]

😂

[@amypace1027]

Facts! As a manger, you work or you walk.

[@cadejust6777]

​@amypace1027 With All Due Respect But Workers Dont Owe You Anything If You Want Workers To Be Bee 🐝 An Asset Treat Them Like An Asset I Actually Have More Respect For CEOS Who Actually Value Their Workers As An Asset Than Psycho Managers Who Just Treat Their Workers Like 👍 Pyscohpathic Authoritarians 🤔

[@karendevansky7598]

I worked in a daycare center for 4 years. I've seen the result of "gentle parenting" and it's not pretty. I'm glad I'm old. I'll be dead before these kids take over.

[@justobserving170]

I feel you. I am 65 and feel that I won't have to deal with this generation before I am gone, or so old it won't matter.

[@15dolcezza]

that is exactly what i tell my students

[@stephenbasham6338]

I am very happy to be on the other side of 60. I will be dead and buried when these snot nosed whiney things take over.

[@christophergraves6725]

Right there is the source of a lot of developmental problems in children. I am referring to daycare. Daycare harms the child's cognitive development unless the child's home life is abysmal, which most children's is not. As Mary Ainsworth and John Bowlby found in their research in Attachment theory, children who are not in near constant contact during the first few years of their lives with a primary caregiver, usually the mother, are never able to form intimate bonds for the rest of their lives. This leads to an inner deadness that is epidemic in America and is the source of many pathologies including drug abuse and sexual promiscuity. Children in daycare tend to develop into those who dominate others or they become dominated by others. Daycare is the root of many evils.

[@Breakpoint369-q1x]

Interesting Karen, the older generations raised the younger generations who are now raising our youngest children. You were a perfect parent weren't you? I've forgiven my parents for their short comings because i have my own and i understand. It's difficult forgiving people who think they did a spectacular job while crushing the soul and spirit of children. It's not just the parents it's the community that needs to help instill these values as well. Hearing older people talk so trashy about the younger gend that they helped raise us not helpful in gaining respect. Just remember that Karen .. you had a part in it wherever you like to believe it or not.

[@marygercke6255]

It isnt just that. Our kids have been exposed to propaganda pitting them against their parents and authority. This is by design. Broken families everywhere.

[@MessageViolation]

I noticed many years ago kids shows present the adults as insufficient and the kids as hierarchy and intellectual.

[@stevenygabbyperez695]

This is not new. It also makes sense. Most Americans grow up in dysfunctional homes. That's why so many young people say parents just don't understand.

[@coleeb1892]

And too many parents for generations have allowed their kids to be raised by their peers without flinching. It has nothing to do with authentic gentle parenting. It has everything to do with parents who refuse to put their time and focus on being present for their kids and creating a safe environment for them to develop deeper self-awareness as they age.

[@sarahwoodman7881]

Yep, happening to my family right now 😢

[@BellaBella-jw9ef]

Look at what happened during the plandemic, kids encouraged to rat on their parents and uncles

[@Super_Nova1234]

Don’t have kids if you don’t want to teach, guide, and protect them. Get a plant.

[@sues3218]

I am glad you said to get a plant, and not a dog. There are way too many people who get a dog and have the same lazy attitude that they have towards raising their kids. There are a lot of undisciplined dogs out there too, which are causing problems in neighborhoods around America. I think the root of it all is plain LAZINESS, which stems from SELFISHNESS.

[@MAGA-LO-MANIAC]

😂😂😂 I think a fern would be better company than most kids these days.

[@brookehanley3659]

@@Super_Nova1234 So many adults should not be having kids.

[@Super_Nova1234]

@@sues3218 absolutely agree! pets are just as much responsibility as the kiddos! I worked at a pet store once and I had a guy come for his kids birthday, and he literally asked me which one of these animals wouldn’t bite his son…. I said they all have teeth so they can bite. You should probably get him a plant!! 🤦🏻‍♀️ this world has definitely gone to crap with the narcissism and self-centeredness and it’s a shame.

[@jenster29]

​@@Super_Nova1234 pets are just as much responsibility as kids ? Huh ????? No fricking way lady 😂😂😂 You raise a kid to be a responsible, productive, respectful adult that can successfully raise the next generation.. thats nowhere near having a pet 😂😂😂

[@sbg4ever120]

I saw a lady in the post office yesterday letting her toddler just pull down a roll of bubble wrap and start popping it to keep him busy while she was prepping packages and dealing with the clerk at the counter. I watched how no one told the child to stop. Then when he was called by his mom to go, he dropped the roll on the floor and they just walked out. My mom would have never allowed that and I would never have allowed that. We have an entire couple of generations with no rules or expectations! 😢

[@BBelle64]

As a bystander I would have told that child to stop, while pointedly telling the mother her child doesn’t have the right to damage someone else’s property. But I’m from the generation who says something. Consequences be damned.

[@michaelwoods2903]

A good example of the product of a rent social fabric caused by inequality and disrespect emanating from the wealthy elite.

[@thepepperlander]

I agree. Respect for the property of others has taken a wrong turn. My children weren't raised like that either.

[@zahrazaveri8140]

Some people don't invest that much in their children. And when those children grow up they have a hard time with reality.

[@alihardy9479]

@@thepepperlander right? On a post about looters, so many people commented well they abandoned their property, when evacuated, so it’s up for grabs! Seriously??!! What is wrong with people nowadays?

[@taylortwinsandpreslie8662]

I fell for the gentle parenting BS when my oldest was a baby 11 years ago. Luckily we saw the light and now have high expectations, clear boundaries, and lots of love.

[@OceanFrontVilla3]

You can have high expectations, clear boundaries and lots of love.. yet discipline gently. The origin of the word "discipline" is "to teach".

[@HobbiesRfun]

@@OceanFrontVilla3 I'm sorry but asking a temper tantrum throwing child "please stop" won't teach them a thing. Instead you DEMAND they stop or else, and if they don't stop then you give them the "or else" so they learn you the parent is the boss, not them. It's called "tough love".

[@saltycat662]

You also need a lot of commincation. Especially in the world we live in. Don't let the Devil teach your kids about anything before you do.

[@sofiatryhub7106]

Bb

[@raechelweir8861]

Good on u. These blinded parents don't realise these same self absorbed kids are going to be the ones they look to in old age to care for them....yeah right.

[@SNAP-2-IT]

Life is tough, so is parenting... we are NOT THEIR FRIENDS, we are their parents! If we are supposed to be friends, we'd be FRIENDS- we can be friends when theyre up, grown & out of the house. Mine turned out grateful, loving and responsible. ❤️

[@cynthiacools-lartigue5297]

My mother raised six very successful people. She maintained that no child is their parent’s friend. She also said something brilliant that I’ve used with my girls and that “you cannot put an old head on young shoulders”. Today we won’t let them go to the store alone but we will let them know that gender can be changed.

[@fifitrixibelle9279]

I said the same thing to my now 4 adult sons..I’ve raised loving respectful sons that have become fathers but I’ve warned them you are NOT YOUR CHILDRENS FRIEND you are their parents.. later you’ll become friends.. sort of.. but until then they are to do what they are told

[@christophergraves6725]

@@fifitrixibelle9279 And you must, as a parent, present them reasons why certain behaviors are harmful in the long run and why others are beneficial. Simply commanding children will lead to resentment and rebellion in some while in the others blind obedience will lead to a servile attitude as well as not being able to become an autonomous adult who can plan for their own future and the future of their family if they have one. Reasoning with a child, even before they can reason very well, will instill in their mind and their character the tendency to reflect on their actions and ask themselves if what they are considering will result in more pain or more happiness in their future.

[@mw6346]

My parents tried to be our friends. I don't have a lot of respect for them now. The only thing that saved me is that they also threw me to the wolves as a teenager. It was sink or swim.

[@kook3084]

When I taught elementary school, this first year teacher told me she wanted to be these kids "friend". I responded you are NOT their friend! Your are not in their peer group! You are the adult!

[@57kwest]

I'm a 44 yr old trucker and walked into a warehouse office yesterday. I'm in full company uniform. In the waiting room was a box truck driver in his 20's, waiting for the his turn. He was wearing sweat pants, hoodie with full, over the ear headphones and crocs. This child is out here representing the company that he's working for; looking like he just rolled out of bed. I blame his PARENTS.

[@SherriFlemming]

Yes, however is influenced by society.

[@slagletoby]

What’s wrong with that? He’s probably self employed at a young age, dressed comfy, and might be outperforming you. He might be using the logistics and shipping industry as a stepping stone where you made a career out of it. He might be the nucleus of the next logistics company too, and a super business owner. Once it’s up and running, he might go start business #2. Never judge a book by its cover.

[@juliawillard8385]

Key word here is might. ​@slagletoby

[@nicolecrow2695]

​@slagletoby it is human nature to judge a book by its cover. Within 30 seconds of seeing someone the brain starts to make judgements. This is a survival instinct to determine fight or flight response. To actively ignore it is setting yourself up for failure. Whether it's a stepping stone or not a person's appearance conveys a lot about them. Do they care about the task they are performing, do they have experience to be prepared for any outcome. You don't walk out in the world not caring about your appearance unless your bank account allows for that attitude 😒. A 20 year old dressed like a slob is probably a slob who doesn't give a single solitary f bomb about his job performance.

[@stacylynn4414]

Blame his parents until he's 18. Blame the business owners after that. If people were fired, they'd grow up and learn how to dress right!

[@jaymoor8995]

One time in my life I got the idea I could talk to my mom like one of my friends, she backhanded me and in an instant said “I’m not one of your friends and you’re not gonna talk to me like that” I got the message.

[@campion04]

Excellent story. Better would have been if you told dad mom smacked you and without hesitation he just smacked you again. I realize as a Dad if I can execute one sentence well, I’ve already satisfied dad role nearly perfectly. That sentence is “what did your mother just say?” With authority, stopping all activities on the spot, and the glare. You can use to anywhere and everywhere. Immediately children are under control.

[@LarryDanaDavid]

That’s abusive and degrading. She could have sternly expressed herself with a conversation. A teachable moment for both of you.

[@campion04]

@LarryDanaDavid there are many ways to address a problem. Yours is one way. His is another. You didn’t hear what was said. “Abusive” is a relative word. A word bandied about waaaaaaay too easily. I’ve heard someone say discipline is abusive. I’m not disputing many situations can be solved with a calm talking to. There are just as many that are solved with a good physical reminder. Life is hard. Hard reminders remind us of that.

[@LarryDanaDavid]

@@campion04 No, backhanding is abusive. I wouldn’t do that in any relationship. An adult should have the coping skills to navigate a situation without losing their composure to such lengths as to commit battery on their child.

[@JessG_20]

She didn't need to backhand you, she could have established boundaries without physical abuse

[@kbarkid]

I've taught high school for 35 years and I can attest to this

[@roseosterndorf1265]

I agree. I taught 8th grade for years.

[@bobbiejojackson9448]

Ditto. I actually left a 15 year teaching career because of the total chaos that exists in our public school system and because my husband and I decided that it was best for me to home school our own children. We're lucky to be able to do it, but we've definitely had to tighten our belts in this economy. Our children and their futures are 100% worth it, though.

[@brookehanley3659]

@@bobbiejojackson9448That is why there is a teaching shortage.

[@MAGA-LO-MANIAC]

That must be annoying as hell.

[@newfreenayshaun6651]

Glad I don't deal with single moms anymore. WONT either! Most of them, they're definitely not doing it right. This puts the responsibility on underdeveloped adults and guess where that leads.... county employment!!🎉🎉

[@m6smitten]

"Gentle" or I would argue absent parenting is why we have so many sociopathic young men.

[@Thatguy-yf5ue]

And young women!

[@JD-ez2zg]

Yes but Family courts will take children away from a parent who parents to give them to a gentle parent.. it’s sick

[@MAGA-LO-MANIAC]

Or "I don't give a shit" parenting.

[@marygoff3332]

Young men? I would argue young women are far more psychologically damaged over the last 15 years. Totally narcissistic due to social media and "no rules" parenting.

[@MountainSimone]

⁠wimpy I want my kid to like me parenting.

[@susanpumphrey354]

My 25 yo daughter recently got married. Her new husband has told my hubby on several occasions how impressed he is with how much she respects us, both just as people and as her parents. I'm really starting to understand how much of a compliment that is. 🥰

[@Rose-zn5ql]

The greatest complement when you can be proud of the way your grown up children move through this world with respect and kindness.

[@darwinbarrie751]

I remember my Dad told me to mow this old ladies yard. I mowed and complained to my Dad that she gave me 50 cents . He took the 50 cents put it in an envelope said go put that in her mailbox. And you will mow for free every week.

[@bobbiejojackson9448]

Good for your Dad. And good on you. It's obvious that you learned something important from that, even if you might not have realized it at the time. My folks were the same way with us and I couldn't be more grateful to them for it.

[@annahbelllancaster2509]

That's great parenting!!

[@MAGA-LO-MANIAC]

You must be my brother.

[@RyanBailey-yg1ow]

May dad would do the same. I am 47 though.

[@queenterraofarchrist344]

Wow. So just because she's been sucking down air on planet earth longer than you she gets free labor? What a crap dad

[@JeffHartley-qw7vg]

As a single father since my 4 kids at the time were, 5, 7, 9, and eleven... now all High School grads. My point is that I did this alone, it was me and my kids against upset dysfunctional family members. WE WON, and I love my kids

[@MAGA-LO-MANIAC]

I've got two children that turned out just fine and three grandchildren who are coming along great. My wife and I decided long ago to live in Tennessee away from the insanity of the city. That seems to be where this Insanity starts brewing.

[@ledheadkustomplastic3442]

Glad it worked out for you.. I raised my two kids alone and had to FIGHT WALKER COUNTY GEORGIA school system and DFACS for trying to raise PRODUCTIVE MEMBERS OF SOCIETY 🤬 The Highschool just pretty much let kids do whatever they wanted and claimed ZERO RESPONSIBILITY FOR ANY BAD OUTCOME.... We survived, but neither of them graduated and adults now telling me just how EASY it was for them to just walk away from school as soon as I dropped them off at the front door they left out the back door 🤬🇺🇲

[@willmercury]

The way it's done. Congratulations.

[@susancoyotesfan]

Gentle parenting is an excuse not to actually parent.

[@nevillecreativitymentor]

TRUE THAT. GP is the road out from taking responsibility.

[@nickh.9816]

I think parents have forgotten that they are primarily responsible for teaching their children. We so easily pass the education off to the educators, forgetting that we, as the parents, are the primary educator.

[@hellabella8295]

Scholastic education is the school’s responsibility with our help.. developing honest, kind, respectful independent thinking kids is the parent’s responsibility.. and these days THE MOST IMPORTANT TRAIT, INDEPENDENT.. NOT SHEEP.. We must instil independent thinking.. the ability to question everything and think of every angle.. and possibility.. and not to put anyone on a pedestal.. because influencers are the bane of society now.. influencing morons who follow INSANE PEOPLE ONLINE..

[@noelvoss6744]

A teacher, I agree!

[@francestaylor9156]

100% our job as parents is to raise kids to be responsible, independent adults that will be positive members of society. They will be happier for it, we, the parents, will be happy, and society will be happy. It’s win-win for everyone.

[@nickh.9816]

@hellabella8295 your not wrong

[@newfreenayshaun6651]

Not me, I would have rather spent all of my employment on teaching my child what he needed to know all the way up through high school. If I had the money to homeschool or private school my child, I definitely would have. The school system is saturated with the same kind of dysfunction. Staff and student body alike

[@shoshaunnagragg6145]

If you don’t respect yourself, you cannot teach your children how to respect you or their elders. Period.

[@laurah.7696]

Men and women do not respect each other either. Treated like crap when they break up with you for no reason. Now you just get ghosted and texted to dump you. How are people thinking it is okay to betray others or lie and cheat your way through life.

[@noelvoss6744]

I've been thinking that for a LONG time. Society has absolutely lost humility and self-responsibility. Both very important! We also need better parenting!

[@302ec]

I tried Gentle Parenting but it didn't work for my kids. 😆 Son thought it was a joke but when I transformed into the old school way. My son got his act together quick.

[@elainescott7365]

I have a 23, 21 & 19 year old. Gentle parenting was never in my vocabulary, I disciplined them the way I was as a kid. They got disciplined when they needed it and we didn't do time out, and was told no and taught them to say yes ma'am, no ma'am, etc. They have turned out to be 3 amazing young adults who work full time jobs, went to trade school and have a good work ethic. This "gentle parenting" and "woke" crap is turning out adults that are nonproductive in society and think they deserve everything and shouldn't have to work for anything.

[@Fayegina]

Ditto but boy it’s a problem within my family and it makes it hard for me to want to spend time with some of them. Don’t get me wrong I love them with all my heart but they have no respect for me.

[@melanie7769]

Good job Mama! The older I get I become more and more grateful for the discipline I received as a child. Your children are a living testimony of the way you raised them.

[@neatoketo6238]

My kids are the same age and my story sounds similar to yours. We have 3 great kids, now young adults, that we love spending time with. The proof is in the pudding!

[@christiannaaguilar714]

Respect 🙏 Honor your father and mother

[@joeschmo7894]

Timeout does nothing

[@billstarr9396]

For the first time ever I find myself in agreement with James Carville.

[@davehoffman9072]

I wanted Carville to keep going. A hall of fame diatribe.

[@MAGA-LO-MANIAC]

I'm finding it a little bit hard to deal with.

[@davehoffman9072]

@@MAGA-LO-MANIAC" Let go and let God."

[@gloriaoxley393]

He's a foul mouthed loser! There's never an excuse for such foul language except ignorance & lack of intelligent vocabulary.

[@gloriaoxley393]

A foul- mouthed person w/o the intelligence to speak w/o using foul language.

[@gertrudewest4535]

People can’t even say, NO, to their dogs! I am an excellent horse trainer and I have been fired for saying, NO, to a horse and been called abusive because they got a little sweaty. It’s gotten beyond ridiculous.

[@lovelyloaa]

Wut? That's nonsense for a trainer

[@AMVilla74]

I love the irony of gentle parenting. Your Mom gave you anxiety because she was trying to teach you right from wrong. Now your kids will give you anxiety because you're expecting them to make good choices when they don't have consequences and so now you accept the responsibility for their bad decisions. My problem is that I also have to deal with your entitled kids.

[@hellabella8295]

I don’t understand kids with anxiety.. it’s OUR RESPONSIBILITY to teach kids to be resilient and handle EVERYTHING IN LIFE.. how to be happy, well balanced, honest, kind and NOT NERVOUS NUT CASES who need therapy EVERYTIME something happens.. 😂😂 ITS RIDICULOUS.. I don’t like to say it but the issue of suicide is a big one. I talked to my kids about it and addressed it.. and I find parents are so scared or don’t know how to talk to their own kids about EVERYTHING.. or how to instil the ability to handle everything life throws at us.. ITS NOT HARD but it seems the parents haven’t worked out how to be happy and stable so they don’t know how to teach their own kids..

[@kimjohnson8471]

My friend, you win the award for the best comment of the day!😅

[@mayLibertyprevail1a]

@@hellabella8295 You make a great point. Parents teach resilience through example; if you are a basket case, your kids probably will be, too! The best way to become a good parent is to become a healthy adult.

[@matthewatwood8641]

Nobody has anxiety from being properly raised in the traditional normal way. That's what we call cap nowadays

[@Laylaunicornlover2]

They get anxiety from getting abused in an attempt to teach them right from wrong, not because they were taught properly A lot of parents gave kids anxiety from being too strict and abusive, and then their kids overcorrected and became too leniet with their kids

[@francestaylor9156]

Letting the kid decide is just lazy parenting. There are just sometimes you have to tell your child what they need vs what they think they want. You’re the adult. It’s your job to be the leader. Always putting it on your child to make the decisions will stress them out.

[@AllenArt64]

It's no secret that kids need a firm hand and consistent schedule. It benefits not only society but them as well.

[@alaws2005]

Gentle parenting does involve a firm hand

[@katiestevenson8920]

My oldest is now 10. As a brand new mom isolated from family, I began going to an early childhood center with mommy and me classes. Turned out to be peak, “gentle parenting” trend but I didn’t know! I learned all the new ‘gentle parenting’ speak and rules. It wasn’t described as gentle parenting- it was described as science based parenting by the “experts.” By four years old my kid was totally out of control! My husband and I literally had to unlearn everything we had learned and deprogram our child to a traditional approach. AKA - the parents are in charge and that’s a good thing. He was so much happier and stable with the traditional parenting approach. Thankfully, we have a great family who helped us and provided lots of support. Otherwise I don’t know where we would be today. The “specialists” with degrees in early childhood development turned out to know nothing but terrible advice!

[@ritacarrot6185]

I am a child from the sixties, and I proud to say I had the best parents and family. Very blessed ☆

[@thecapricorn11]

gen xer here. its frightening and ridiculous the way parents are noe

[@bigtalk2598]

A parent of 6 boys. Oldest 33, youngest, 19. Being a dad is the hardest thing to be on this planet. And it doesn't end when they leave the house. All of mine, thanks to the Holy Spirit and my wife, have become upright, moral, Christian men. Hopefully they continue this as the generations continue. I grew up in a dysfunctional home full of alcoholics, and became a born again Christian at 20 years old, and vowed my kids would not have my type of household growing up. We dedicated ourselves to homeschooling back in the early 90s. My family kicked me out of the clan. Thankfully, my parents came back and became good grandparents to our kids. They realized we weren't cult leaders or aliens. Now homeschooling is mainstream. I've raised a research chemist, an engineer turned pastor, 2 pilots, one in law school, an aspiring city planner. 3 played college football, two at the D1 level. 4 all-state athletes. It wasn't easy, and I made lots of mistakes. But I never coddled them, and was quite strict with them as they were youngsters. As they became older, that's when the parenting attitude changed somewhat. You can make a 10 year old do whatever you want. It's not that way when they are 16 and full of testosterone. Your attitude must change at that point. Stern and unwavering works at 10, not at 16. Just my two cents.

[@tracypolselli1464]

Wow, six boys! Incredible. 😊

[@cestmoi5687]

I am so glad about this interview. I have not been blessed with children, however I have been appalled with how I see children being raised, with parents providing no guidance as to values. This message needs to be spread far and wide. It's a pity it's gotten to this point.

[@SManchester]

I think it's a lack of parenting altogether. When I see a parent out with their children in public, the kids are running around while the parents are busy scrolling on their phone. They don't even pay attention to their kids.

[@alexandramercado4162]

I’m a private voice and piano teacher, and I go to students houses to teach them. It’s actually incredible when a kid is disrespectful towards me and the parent doesn’t say anything

[@Parcha64]

I'd just get up and leave the lesson. I know money is tight these days, but everyone deserves dignity when visiting the home of another. Those adults also have to suffer consequences for being brats. I once worked in an extremely affluent town and had a lot of spoiled adults try to intimidate me and force impossible things to happen. Sometimes you have to hold them accountable, and generally the thing they want is worth more to them than the tantrum they're about to throw. Something as simple as a well placed judgemental look is surprisingly effective at conjuring up shame. 😂

[@mariebrooks875]

I also am a private music teacher (piano and flute). I recently had a 10 year old boy insist that I had the note names wrong and that he was correct. He refused to practice or do any theory because he was too busy. His father just sat there saying nothing. Needless to say, after three lessons he didn’t return. How on earth do these parents expect their children to accomplish anything in life with this know-it-all attitude that is just incorrect? So glad I can choose my students and am retiring soon.

[@barbaraenns9517]

I cannot stand when moms say ‘okay?’ After telling a child something.. “We’re going home now, OKAY?” No! They don’t need a reason to refute your instructions!!

[@MountainSimone]

@@barbaraenns9517 TOTALLY!!👍👍👍

[@biffm.2806]

I think the “okay?” isn’t asking if it’s ok, they’re asking if the child heard them.

[@SJeffries-mb9qv]

I agree with the previous reply. I don’t think they’re asking for permission. I sometimes say it without thinking. What I mean by it is “did you understand what I just said”. Could be worded better, so I’m trying to not say “ok” anymore and just say, “do you understand”.

[@rosc2022]

@@biffm.2806 I agree with you, because I used to say OK all the time (looking to see if they heard and/or understood). After hearing it put the way Barbara does in the original post, I changed it to, "Do you understand me?" That seems to work better on adults, also.

[@LoriCollis]

Gentle parenting ruins children. Period.

[@christophergraves6725]

Whether a gentle or more direct and forceful approach is more successful in the long run depends on the temperament of the child. What is imperative in any case is patiently explaining to the child the reasons why certain behaviors are going to pay off in the long run for him/her and why other behaviors will lead him/her to ruin so that they come to see these principles for themselves over time as they gain a longer time horizon for all of their decisions.

[@fattoria_di_bastoni]

⁠stop just stop. @@christophergraves6725 🛑

[@jessicahouston605]

*permissive parenting. Gentle parenting is firm boundaries, clear expectations and calmly applying appropriate discipline and consequences. Permissive parents let their kids run the show.

[@mikeb3172]

Don't use "gentle parenting" to convince people to threaten their kids and live in an emergyency 24/7.. what parenting is that

[@alaws2005]

Permissive parent and authorian ruins children PERIOD!!!!!!! By the way gentle parenting is authoritative, words no can be used, children have boundaries, ext.

[@hellabella8295]

OMG! I love this man! I was a single mother and broke and I NEVER CONFIDED WE WERE BROKE TO MY KIDS.. because I didn’t want them worrying BECAUSE THEY WERE TOO YOUNG TO HAVE THAT PRESSURE ON THEM.. and I always spoke to my kids about everything but when they were ready.. and he’s 100% right, each kid is different and develop differently.. and as a parent we KNOW what maturity level our kids at at.. It’s all COMMON SENSE!

[@julieb7785]

It is all about common sense....I was a legal secretary (single/no kids)...I sat within earshot (downtown SF) of a number of single working mothers who would often lament to their children, during an after-school check-in (kids as young as 7) that they were stressed, broke, "Dad's such a jerk", sick of this, done with that...processing their predicaments and emotions with their little kids. And the mums were not at all fazed as they ranted in proximity to the rest of us...

[@LadyAevarislyn]

Exactly!

[@patmarshall391]

Thank you, Megyn Kelly, for this.

[@jillyjoan8416]

I think every act of discipline is a teaching moment.

[@angelmessenger8240]

You can't be your child's friend, you are responsible for educating them and that means that you have to protect them from themselves. A child will run out into traffic if not controlled, but apparently that's ok for some.

[@namewitheld2568]

That's why being a grandparent is so wonderful. Now you just have to love the baby. You're not responsible for turning it into a well-functioning well-adjusted adult member of society.

[@mayLibertyprevail1a]

@@namewitheld2568 I think a good grandparent can and often should pass on positive values to a child--as long as it is done in such a way that is respectful of the parent's values & wishes for how the child should be taught.

[@rick-grim]

MK- bring this man back for more interviews! He nailed the parent child relationship!

[@reganhillebrecht430]

As a pediatric Occupational Therapist the biggest problem we have with children is the poor environmental conditions that inundate our children’s physiology and psychology. The food, water, air, environmental toxins in personal care products, stress, lack of movement and lack of sleep is what is destroying our families. Our children are chronically sick and so are parents. Parents are financially stressed or over focused on careers. Parents lack respects for their children and set no boundaries. Its a group of sick individuals in a chaotic free for all. Children are raised in herds at the age of 6 months in day cares with an adult you know nothing about. We have lost the concept of traditional family values and therefore are children are being raised with a lack of respect for themselves and others. Our parents all well as our children are victims of this over industrialized corrupt world. This guy is spot on about the collapse of parenting but there are root causes to this demise that we are not addressing.

[@mayLibertyprevail1a]

We really need to get more moms (or dads, in some cases) back in the home and get back to the idea of family & small community, rather than virtual strangers at daycare & schools raising your kids (while herding 20-30 others at the same time) for you.

[@crocodilegrundee4514]

I’ve been warning people about the new way of parenting for over 20 years. We have many soft and fragile young people to deal with now. Thankfully I had no qualms about using the paddle when appropriate, and my 20 something year old children grew up respectful.

[@OceanFrontVilla3]

Mine grew up respectful and successful too and I never resorted to physical force because I never lost control. I used gentle but firm child psychology. My father used a belt and I never forgave him, even when he was dying of cancer.

[@sues3218]

I was saying the same thing, but it fell on deaf ears. Today, their children are off their rockers. Mine are well grounded and respected at their jobs.

[@paulinegauthier1867]

​​​@@OceanFrontVilla3- You need to grow up. You refused to forgive your father even when he was dying of cancer? Forgiveness is a measure of maturity. Have you been 100% perfect with your kids? Do you want them holding grudges when you die?

[@crocodilegrundee4514]

@@OceanFrontVilla3 I never lost control either. When you do, you’ve waited too long. Obviously people don’t understand what it really is if you think you only use it when you lose control. That’s actually the wrong time!

[@dianathompson8794]

Not only are they soft and fragile , but many of them have severe mental issues. They are totally unable to navigate the ups and downs of life, and are terrified of existence

[@lorrainecaporaletti226]

Carville’s so right and love his voice

[@shellythie6227]

Self-esteem and humility are NOT the same thing!

[@shellythie6227]

"Stop crying, or I'll give you something to cry about." Is absolutely fine when you're dealing with a tantrum and crying for no legitimate reason! And always works IF you actually follow through! Gentle parenting is NOT parenting at ALL!!!

[@KarenKennedy-lq8nt]

But you say it enough the kids will not believe you.

[@shellythie6227]

@KarenKennedy-lq8nt ONLY if you lie and don't follow through.

[@labab1048]

You say it for yourself, to cool off

[@MAGA-LO-MANIAC]

That was my parent's motto.

[@amypace1027]

All my parents had to say was “cause I said so”, enough for me. I’m the youngest I watched the where the line was. 😂

[@j1947m]

I LOVE the true statement about "self esteem" vs. "bravery."

[@rachelfrees1268]

Oh my gosh. To hear this in 2024..honoring/respecting your parents is just the best. Mr. Carville, thank you. Young people, to their defense, have no deep grounded roots to know this information. The Bible teaches us all this, but you’ve got to believe and read all this for it to adhere to one’s brain/ character.

[@viviennepastor3188]

Young people are promoted way too early. They do not have the experience or the ability to do most high level jobs. The adult brain is not developed until 26 years of age. I know that in my time we were not promoted until much later in life but maybe our elders had a point. Promoting a 23 year old to advise government is just ridiculous.

[@katiee3842]

This may be true, but calling 18-25 year old adults “kids” is part of the gentle coddling of them that has done the harm. There are COLLEGE aged adults with their parents still intervening on their behalf in school, work, etc. and that behavior has become mainstreamed for parents. It is so STRANGE to me.

[@testerbend9473]

Kids don’t decide PERIOD!

[@christopherhorn1161]

As the youngest of 4, I can't remember having choice as a kid

[@Itslauraokay]

That’s also toxic they will never trust themselves if you don’t let them choose some things

[@Tast-1934.]

Actually they have a right to decide

[@testerbend9473]

@ no they don’t actually. Parents have responsibility for their children. Children can make decisions like strawberry or chocolate icecream, but parents are in control and you are a slave to them if you think otherwise

[@mayLibertyprevail1a]

I think that parenting involves some negotiables (e.g. red shirt or blue today?) and some non-negotiables (e.g. no, you may not have chocolate cake for dinner). As the child gets older, we need to gradually give them more freedom, in safe ways, based on their maturity level. (Otherwise, you might wind up with a kid who goes off to college and makes every wrong choice imaginable, just because they suddenly can. lol)

[@lazvt8469]

Great show....I'm 63, 4 great kids....learned a few things to share with my kids who now have children of their own. Don't overshare....they don't have context and may not handle the information in a healthy way.

[@deedeesmith3073]

Wow first time I like what James has said !!!!

[@ericcecil989]

😂'Stop that crying or I'll give you something to cry about' a classic line😂my mum said that too. Same age as Megan and from Scotland.

[@brookehanley3659]

Another i heard more than once, What do you think money grows on trees?

[@MAGA-LO-MANIAC]

That was my parents motto.

[@Tast-1934.]

Oh my God that's horrible I'm so sorry why r u happy about this?

[@Echidna7095]

I sure they did and it was a crap parenting move. A parent who bullies and threatens has no more moral authority than the so called gentle parents

[@MAGA-LO-MANIAC]

@Echidna7095 The ends justify the means.

[@lisahill9489]

Wow, that was true wisdom for parents. 🙏🏻

[@bcoxal]

I agree with Carville on this

[@gloriaoxley393]

Foul mouthed Carville. Too ignorant to speak w/ decent vocabulary.

[@artspark7697]

Went to big Christmas dinner thought I was in the Twilight zone. 6 year olds cursing at adults, an 8 year old dismissive and dressed inappropriately. Horrible.

[@stevenwonnacott3669]

What a great discussion between Megyn and Dr. Sax...spot on correct!

[@nerdygrl647]

I'm in my mid-30's and hoping to become a mother within the next few years. One of the advantages to waiting this long has been observing other people in my generation who are already parents and making note of their major mistakes (gentle parenting being one of them). I have no desire to gentle parent at all, and will be parenting virtually the same way my parents did with me. I plan to have children that I and other people enjoy being around. That should be the goal for every parent during the first three years of a child's life. As my mom says, it's hard in those first 2-3 years, but if you put in the work, things get so much easier and your children will be a joy to be around. The problem with so many parents my age is that they don't do the proper work with discipline and consequences, then they end up with children they can't stand.

[@Tast-1934.]

Will you ever consider what kind of person your kid wants to be and whether their happy or not?

[@Tast-1934.]

Will you ever consider what kind of person your kid wants to be and whether their happy or not?

[@Tast-1934.]

Will you ever consider what kind of person your kid wants to be and whether their happy or not?

[@bondojoe8161]

To any intelligent person, this is common logic...self evident.

[@mayLibertyprevail1a]

Unfortunately, logic is something that is sorely lacking in our society these days!

[@hellabella8295]

I have noticed kids SCREAMING A LOT in supermarkets and next door.. my kids NEVER SCREAMED.. not ever.. they would talk.. and I don’t understand what’s going on.. kids don’t seem happy now.. Very rarely do I see kids in supermarkets just talking or enjoying the experience.. and the parent talking to the kid.. it’s so weird now..

[@christinec8818]

I honestly thought a 7 or so year old girl at the school bus stop near by was being kidnapped. I went outside, because the screaming was so intense, only to overhear the mother was telling the child they couldn't get McDonald's today. The mother then went on to plead with the girl to stop screaming, and they'll go tomorrow.

[@Evan8787]

Nowadays lazy parents let screens raise their kids. The kids' brains have rotted away.

[@katiee3842]

THIS. I have noticed this

[@ahavens2463]

OMG. YES! everywhere. They squeal and scream. It's ridiculous! I hear them sass their parents and interrupt them as well.

[@jg6709]

I saw a baby making little screeching noises in the supermarket. His mother completely ignored him. She didn't talk to him, interact with him or anything. Consequently the screeching got louder and more frequent as they went round the store.

[@susanadamson5048]

I love you Megyn, and I love this segment and agree wholeheartedly. One thing I would note is that the language we use sets the tone for respect. The foul language people use now days could be changed as a first step in earning our kids respect.

[@dorothylowrie730]

IF THAT AIN’T THE TRUTH 😢. So sad and parents are too damn busy, or pretending to be, to raise their children these days.

[@Sue-xv8os]

It's not an easy world we live in and kids need to be prepared for it.

[@kimmcnatt6301]

Very interesting discussion and I agree with him.

[@MannatAjmani]

Even the school are unable to control unruly students. Everything on paper but no practical.

[@elizabethpeterson455]

In have always been skeptical of self esteem. We should be teaching self respect....but never at the expense of thinking we're better than anyone else. Huge respect for this man...

[@aliecarey]

Childhood only lasts a moment. You have a VERY short amount of time to help them become capable, respectful adults. Your kids will thank you! My son is 20, he has his shit together! He is on an amazing path and is grateful we gave him life tools.

[@zadestrujillo1804]

AMEN TO The USING of THE POWERFUL WORD of the KING in this issue 👍👍

[@rebeccashelton3552]

Love this so much about humility and having courage!!! Well said, Dr. Leonard Sax.

[@evalehde3869]

Amen and AMEN!

[@Lisa-dn2gx]

God bless that man!! I've been saying the same things (writing in comments too) for 15 years!! It's OUR DUTY as parents to teach our children the basics the same as our parents & grandparents, with love, setting parameters, having a schedule & discipline & yes that means a smack on the backside when deserved!!

[@lizwiens671]

What’s happening is the parents are making the kids feel like they are in charge, that is why they’re so anxious. They don’t have the capacity to make most decisions that’s why they have parents. There has never been so much bad advice as there is in the world of parenting ‘experts’

[@alaws2005]

I agree permissive parenting is a huge problem but gentle parenting. Gentle parenting is authoritative

[@JillHuber-gi9qs]

That man is right. Young people need to learn respect

[@sbboy333]

I remember when my late Father told me that his job was not to be my friend, but to raise a man. I was 13 years old at the time. It really hurt my feelings! 🤣 Now I’m raising 3 kiddos under 5 years old. I’m already tough on my boys when needed and it feels like sometimes I’m on the outside looking in compared to other young parents. Thank you for this video

[@charmjdeane2225]

I 💯 agree with the title of this episode

[@reneesmith1339]

Everyone is afraid CPS will be called on them for the way they discipline their kids!!

[@robertjones8644]

Absolutely spot on

[@johnnypgood100]

My italian mom made use of the wooden spoon ... and often told us what we needed to hear...RIP mom

[@Echidna7095]

Threatening and assaulting a child is not the opposite of so called gentle parenting. It is no better and equally lacking in moral authority

[@margiedenavarre7919]

That was AWESOME, so well said.

[@ronaldolson3393]

And did our higher educational institutions behave anything to do with our public loss of respect for our elders.

[@sues3218]

So did parenting. Many parents didn't discipline and teach their children properly, and this is the result. It is the parents who PAID to send them off to the indoctrination camps. They were too busy getting their toys, and didn't pay attention to what was happening to their own children. They abdicated their responsibilities to another. I have watched it my entire life, and I am 53 years old. We are now reaping what has been sown for generations.

[@coffeecoffee1572]

I absolutely agree that humility is a huge virtue that should be embraced. By everyone. Always be humble. Very important.

[@DavianSinner]

I wonder if kids being driven to school has something to do with this. "In my day" everyone took the bus. You were embarrassed if dad drove you to school. My old boss had to leave work every day to go pick up his kids and drive them to school. A bus was available. Pick them up after school too. He said the line of cars was so bad, they had to hire a traffic cop.

[@BrattyPatriot]

yep, I've wondered the same thing.

[@maniwyatt6559]

I had to walk to school from kindergarten on and every school was far away!

[@deeceea9488]

You're so right. The line of cars at even the smallest school is insane.

[@ignaciaramirez520]

They were not describing gentle parenting. They were describing permissive parenting. Gentle parenting 100% teaches boundaries with self and boundaries with others.

[@annabellswint5718]

I'm a 61 yr old pediatric office nurse. I witness this crap everyday. Parents are soft! As for my grandkids, I don't play the game. Even with my autistic one.

[@sunnyday7843]

It’s created a bunch of rude adults . I work with adults only and have finally had to start being so choosey about who I keep as a client . It really has gotten to that point and I am protecting my self and my business . Demanding and rude people are trying to find jobs and are dating with an attitude that really makes one think twice about working with them . Demanding and selfish people .

[@andrebeauchamp6897]

I totally agree with James Carville. 🤷🏾‍♂️

[@DavianSinner]

I saw a mom in Target, and when her little kid, like an older toddler, began wandering away from her, I mean feet away, she says "Danger! Danger!" and the kid comes back. I was thinking, I hope this mom is a rarity.

[@thecapricorn11]

they’re raising kids to be afraid of everything

[@testerbend9473]

Honesty is a dealbreaker.

[@chickginger]

"Gentle parenting" is letting your kids go out into life and make all their dumbass mistakes as an adult without guidance instead of when they're young with you there to help them through it.

[@alaws2005]

Correction permissive parenting

[@carolinelease1647]

Very, very good, amen - thank you, Doctor, and Megyn for sharing/spreading this truth!

[@walt1955]

It is not surprising that birth rates have plunged. Parenting in today's America is a horrible prospect.

[@WalburgisLuppus]

Thank you, ...thank you I've been saying this for years! ✨

[@100daysatatime]

The way parents "police" all their interactions with every child, teacher, family member...everyone. OK, since I don't know how to talk to your child, I won't talk to you or your child. Thank you for making it easy.

[@sim7409]

right? didn't want to anyway

[@KarinaSkye]

Wow! This was some incredible teachings! Thank you!!! Courage, respect, and humbleness ❤❤❤ loved this! Thank you! I have a 3 and 6 years old and this is very helpful.

[@justobserving170]

Megyn my parents were the same as yours. I am 65, and when I was a kid, my parents were not my, or my sibling's, friend; they were our parents.

[@Jabo__Jabo]

I swear you gotta love James Carville. 😂😂😂😂

[@johnlagerstrom8620]

Excellent guest today!

[@TheTeach56]

More than teaching right and wrong, it's contributing to the construction of their moral compass in conjunction with their convictions and personality which is so very complicated and takes time, time, time. The soul cannot be rushed.

[@lostandfound5145]

Amen!

[@Fayegina]

If you gentle parent your child they will be disrespectful and have problems with friendships.

[@Echidna7095]

Yeah. But so many people here seem to think the opposite of so called gentle parenting is to bully and threaten your child. That’s as bad.

[@Fayegina]

@ that’s so true! It’s finding a balance. Definitely don’t want your child to be afraid of you. You need your child to respect you.

[@alaws2005]

No a child would would not. Gentle parenting is authoritative not permissive

[@Ghalyah-u1s]

I Raised My Children just the way Dr. Sax is describing and they turned out great! Thank you for sharing

[@hellabella8295]

Very few children respond to gentle parenting.. some very soft kids who don’t have a wild spirit and are shy respond well.. BUT THE MAJORITY OF KIDS NEED RESPECT INSTILLED INTO THEM. I never hit my kids but I can assure you with one look they KNEW I WAS SERIOUS and a bit of fear is a good thing.. because it could save their life.. Parents must teach their kids respect, kindness, honesty, etc and the ability to think laterally and independently and TO NEVER BE SHEEP and this is VITAL TODAY.. NEVER WORSHIP ANYONE.. My proudest moment was when my kids disagreed with me because they thought of something and they had a differing point of view about a subject.. of course they were WRONG 😂 but I encourage independent thinking.. and point out the many ways to look at one particular subject. It’s NOT DIFFICULT parenting but it’s a full time thing and I find people just don’t know what parenting means today.. ITS OUR RESPONSIBILITY TO RAISE THE BEST POSSIBLE PERSON WE CAN.. and it takes time and effort.. and is the most rewarding thing we can do..

[@michellerob80]

Humility and gratitude.❤❤❤❤. Beautiful

[@psidvicious]

It seems like kids these days regard anyone older than them as just pesky, nagging bigger versions of themselves, that don’t deserve any kind of special respect at all. “Respect for your elders” seems to have become antiquated nonsense. The grown-ups living next door used to be Mr & Mrs Soandso. Now days to kids they are just plain “Joe & Lisa”. When I was growing up in the 70’s it wasn’t unusual at all that if I was screwing up, I might even get smacked by Mr or Mrs Neighbor.