Step Mom Life | How To Cope | You are not alone!

[@alisonleigh100]

I have been a stepmom for 7 years now. My stepson is 13. Currently we are going through one of the hardest times with him and his mother that we’ve experienced so far. Being a stepmom is HARD and if I could go back in time, I would choose a different path. It takes a very strong person to raise someone else’s child and to have your husband’s ex-wife in your life.

[@Ari-ge5cp]

This to me answers my questions. Im with my bf for almost 5 yrs. His son has now shown some sort of dislike towards me. Im unsure if i should tell my bf how he is to me.... i dont want to continue with this

[@alisonleigh100]

@@Ari-ge5cp I think you should tell your boyfriend about it 100%. Open honest and respectful conversation with your partner is necessary. Don’t hold anything in sister! Good luck to you. 💕

[@shashamarie4760]

May I ask you-do you have your own child too? I'm a step mom, but do not have my own. It makes it very difficult and sad for me.

[@alisonleigh100]

@@shashamarie4760 I don’t have my own. I agree it makes step parenting harder when you don’t have your own.

[@shashamarie4760]

@@alisonleigh100 thank you for replying. I have tears in my eyes for us. Being a stepmom can be very rewarding but when thinking if I could have my own too makes me want to cry.

[@CassidyNoelle911]

Amen sister. It is not an easy job at all & I have so much respect for any woman that takes on the role of becoming a step mom. So many people say how hard it is being a mom, but truth is if you think that's hard, then they have NO idea what us step mamas go through. We're superheroes & it takes an even stronger woman to post an entire video on this. If you ever need someone to talk/relate to, I'd love to offer any support where I can because I've been there. Hang in there girl.

[@chilyfeforever6252]

You think thats hard? Try being a step child.

[@alexvelsor3208]

Been a step mom for a year now and this is so refreshing to hear! Nothing can really prepare you for the journey of being a step mom and the trails you are faced with. Definitely can 100% understand the challenging relationship with the mom. You are so right! All you can do is focus on what you are doing because when negative things come from the other household you have no idea what emotions (fear/jealousy/regret) that is coming from but as long as you are being the best parent you can be then you have nothing to apologize for ❤️

[@Melodyphoenix]

I needed this so much. I’m pregnant with my first child and I’m a stepmom. I’m stressed out. But I’m doing my best. I really appreciate you doing this video.

[@erinaguilera2031]

_PLAINJANE2 been there done that! Do NOT stress (try your best not to) it’s not worth it for you baby. I’m not sure what your situation is like, but if it’s negative talk ignore it and redirect, you deserve respect you are a stepPARENT.

[@adammaloney3192]

Do u get step kids on weekend or full time?

[@geovannasouza9438]

@@erinaguilera2031 good advice get into verbal arguments with a child.

[@gizellebarretto]

I am having difficulties now. I am a stepmom to a 6 yr old. We were getting along very well. We talk about everything, how she feels, how I feel, she listens to me and we love each other. But recently, she is acting out now that I have a 1 month old son. She began being a hard headed maybe because I don't have much time to talk with her like we used to be.

[@btsarmyforever3816]

@@gizellebarretto Rather than view her as a step child putting on a tantrum, look at her as a child who feels insecure that the person who she sees as her own mother, showering love on another child ^^. This is a very common situation in a household even with biological kids. Older children will always act out when there is a new child. they cannot understand that the newborn needs a lot of love and care and that mom is also tired post pregnancy and the round the clock feeding and changing and the doc visits. What you can do is: Involve the child in your newborn's care as well. If the child feels closeness with her sibling, obv she will feel much better. Like she matters too. Also, good food is the way to one's soul. If you cook a delicious but fast meal, the child will feel very appreciated. Talk to her frankly. Tell her that her sibling needs a lot of care but she is very much loved as well. When the newborn grows up, he will like his elder sister very much and she will gain a new playmate too ^^. The problem is not the stepchild here, its the situation of sibling rivalry hehe. She might also be scared that as a step-mom u might love ur biological kid more, a fear every stepchild has, a fear that the stepparent has to put a rest to.

[@Britfan06]

This honesty is much appreciated. I have two step children and as you said it is by far the hardest thing I've ever done. Even nursing school wasn't this stressful.

[@rsmith6757]

Lawd, i needed that comparison. Thank you bcus I’m tryna start nursing school & I’m a step mom

[@kefentsemogwai2978]

I am only 11 months in ds journey of step parenting 😢n it's d worsed thin I hv tried in my life....by far....I want ds journey to end n it looks like my fiance want to end with me...bt I think m ready for dat

[@hildacorona3208]

I’m a step mom and totally relate it’s sad when the other parent is more abt themselves and their feelings rather than what’s important for their child ..

[@angeljosephs30]

Yesssss omgg I’m just gonna pray!

[@thomasfaucette1446]

to fuckin bad

[@lonniecharbonneau5230]

Being a step mom is definitely one of the hardest things I’ve done it’s normal for the other parent to be jealous and for the kid to react and wanna treat you badly from my experience and that makes it hard because all you wanna do it love them and help them

[@TheCamilla5]

Thank you so much for your advice!! I’m a new step mama myself and let me tell ya it’s tough! Especially when no one you know personally is going through it. This helps so much! 💕🙌

[@pixiecanaday5692]

Yes the stalking the social media by the other side has been driving me crazy! You are so right, it's better to just ignore it and focus on the kids. Being a stepmom can be soooo hard at times, but videos like this help! Thank you so much for sharing. :)

[@blancaestelaskitchen]

Thank you for sharing your story Erin. I am a stepmom to 4 girls, 2 of them live with my husband and I because we have full custody of them. One is 6 yrs. old and the other one is 13 yrs. old and let me tell you, it only gets worse. The other 2 are adults and live away from home. My husband and I have been married for a little over 4 years and we also have 2 kids of our own. I have been helping my husband raise those girls since they were younger. In my situation my stepdaughters visit the mom over the weekend and when they come back home from being away a few days they are defensive, feisty and see me as an enemy. When the biological mother is around and is an evil person she will always bad mouth you no matter what you do. Me as a Stepmom feel very unappreciated all the time. Think about it a million times before you get into a serious relationship with a single father.

[@juanitasjbl4409]

Blanca, I’m sorry to hear that. As a mother of three, my ex husband just started dating and moved in his new girlfriend. I’m watching these videos so that I’m able to put my children needs above my own.

[@blancaestelaskitchen]

@@juanitasjbl4409 good luck to you. Every situation is different and we all have different scenarios. Take care of yourself and your children. Men have different ways of thinking than us, we as mothers prioritize our children before anything and anyone else.

[@Rayaelle]

Any way to prevent that? Should a future stepmom (that'd be me) meet the mother before getting into a serious relationship with the single father?

[@enishalihoward8119]

Thank you for this because I’ve noticed the change too. Every time they come back from their mother they try to abuse me emotionally. I don’t get why the bio mothers do that. It’s like one day your kid could be murdered because the husband chose a woman unstable etc you’re right when you say think about hard and deep. I wish more women could think about it because it would save a lot of lives of children who unfortunately get harmed by step parents

[@sunnys3325]

Im a step parent and have raised my son from age 4 to now he is 16. The whole time I have been villainized in front of him by his mother and family. Since a small age we were warned by all teachers that we need to get an grip on him or we are going to have MAJOR issues when he get older. His mother just defends him no matter what. Even his own family didnt want to babysit him when he was small because he was not behaved at all. It has been a nightmare for me for so many years that this has broke me physically and mentally. He does nothing and is a horrible student. His mother let's him do whatever he wants and I have NEVER seen him grounded seriously. I have NEVER seen her sit down for a real conversation. He has grown up with absolutely no consequences and now we have a 16 year old that goes to school when he feels like it. No questions asked ever about anything from his mother. I have tried to be the caring parent but all they made me out to be is a pestering step parent. I come from a good home and am the eldest of two younger sisters. I had a structured upbringing while my wife is from a divorced home where they did what they want. I'm broken after all these years. She treats our daughter totally different like parent of the year but for him its a whatever attitude and protect him even if he has done horribly wrong. I live 24/7 with excuses for him. Im the one who tought him how to ride a bike, to catch a baseball, to play guitar. I did his homework with him when he was small and fed him and tried to be "the dad" and all I have gotten is shit on by his mother and him. If we didnt have a 7 year old beautiful daughter, I wouldve been gone long ago. I'm Fd and stuck! I have always loved kids and have a huge family. For me to be portrayed this way is hurtful because my fam and friends KNOW I am not what they make me to be.

[@ashleynicole9423]

I am so sorry. There is nothing easy about that situation. Have you tried the online forums? I think those folks there would have solid advice for you. I hope you find the support you need.

[@sunnys3325]

@@ashleynicole9423 thanks for ur reply. I have tried everything including family counseling. Nothing works because his mother lies to them and minimizes how she has acted all these years towards him. Im so sick of being disrespected all these years in my own home. She has literally yelled at me for being angry at him right in front of him all these years so he has absolutely NO respect for me at all. All my friends and family can see how this has changed me. Im not who I was anymore because of this. I live in a stress filled nightmare every day with him living in this house. Compromise and being on the same page when dealing with him never existed. I used to be strong and tough minded and goal focused and this has totally broken me. They win....

[@ashleynicole9423]

@@sunnys3325 You are in a really tough situation that sounds really toxic at this point. And most of us in this stepparent lifestyle don’t have any outside support because no one understands what it’s like unless they’re in it. It sounds like your spouse is not on your side and your on two different pages. That’s problem number one and NOT okay. It sounds like she has not corrected disrespectful behavior and has not supported you in disciplinarian action. You should’ve disengaged a long time ago. If you’re unfamiliar with the disengaging concept please google it. Please read up on some of the step parenting forums, Reddit, and blogs. It will help I promise. There are so many others like you who have survived horrible situations. Even worse than yours although I know it’s hard to believe. I know you love your SS but be very clear, no matter where his bio dad is, he is NOT your son. He is your step son. You need to disengage for your health and sanity. That is your wife’s child. Let her deal with it. Immediately stop making ss a priority and make yourself the priority. When he is there leave. When he is around go in another room. When he doors something wrong call his mother. You get the drift. If he is getting violent you still disengage. Let her know that the moment he harms you or something that belongs to you, you call the police. Period. And she will be responsible for any costs associated with his bail and the repair or replacement of his damages. This is on her. She is wrong for allowing this to get out of hand. These people her family and such, are mad at you for being a better dad than bio dad. So stop. Stop immediately being anything. You are not required to love that kid like your own. It sounds like you do but it’s a mistake. They will never see you as real dad and will always long for real dad no matter how crappy he is. Your efforts will not be appreciated so do the bare minimum. Secondly you and spouse need to have a sit down. You come to her with a list of conditions. If she doesn’t agree you leave. Seriously. I wouldn’t recommend you stay in such a toxic environment at all. If you have the resources to do so, and she is unwilling to agree to your terms regarding parenting, respect, etc, then you walk away. She has kids, not you. And she needs to respect you and be on your side. If she can’t do that, a basic foundation of your relationship is broken. Say bye.

[@melissahernandez8806]

Thank you for this video, I am a step mom of three boys ages 6,7,8. I have no kids if my own yet, and trust me it hasn’t been easy, at times I have to be alone because it gets very overwhelming, especially that fact that I’ve never had kids.

[@vibewithlou]

I saw this, and I can completely understand. I was with someone with three kids. 8,5,4. And I don’t have any kids of my own. I had to end it, for many other reasons besides him having children with another woman. But I really hope you find space for yourself and wish you the best!

[@allanaguilera5851]

You are a phenomenal wife, mother and bonus mama. I love you with all the cells in my being. I'm so proud of you.

[@erinaguilera2031]

Allan Aguilera love you soooo

[@ft6510]

Allan Aguilera simp

[@gamesrfun2725]

@@ft6510 incel

[@cstarr92722]

I completely understand the struggle. I have been a stepmom to 2 girls for the past 6 years. They are now 10 and 13 years old. Their mom's have been difficult. All you can do is be the best influence possible for them. I previously raised my exhusband's daughter who is now 26. We also had 2 boys together. I've been a stepmom my entire adult life, but it doesn't get easier....even when they're adults. Hang in moms!

[@magickjojo4845]

Wow I thought I was going through it with just one biological mother.. bless you for being a wonderful stepmother to 2 daughters with different mothers. Sending all good energy your way and hope you get the recognition you deserve for being there for all your children 💕

[@Makeupbydanyel_]

I do not have kids of my own but I am a step mom to 3 kids ....this experience has me rethinking if I want kids of my own. 🤦🏾‍♀️ anyone eles relate??? - im so stressed and my anxiety is so bad bc of this. At times - it makes me question my marriage. The kids are here for the summer - and I found myself not even wanting to be in my own house. I rather stay at work.

[@Ari-ge5cp]

Me. I sometimes think if im selfish. But girl, my bf son was so rude to me this past weekend. Shoved sand into my shoes, made rude remarks about my appearance. Should i tell my bf? I have issues with him too

[@Makeupbydanyel_]

@@Ari-ge5cp anytime I tell my husband about his children bad behavior he either makes excuses for it or it falls on deaf ear. I've been reading a few books about being a "stepmom" and the best advice and common theme that keeps coming up is to disengage. We feel frustrated bc we're stepping up in situations that we shouldn't. Our men can be lazy and they will take advantage. Stop trying to be a parent to children thats not yours. Allow for the biological parent to step up. It's our job to support them (even if we do not agree with their parenting skills or approach). Put the responsibility back on the biological parents. It's not our job to makeup where there is lack - we didn't create this. So instead of planning family outing...I planned a spa day for me, myself and I. Instead booking hair appointments for the kids, I booked it for myself. If husband/bf want this or that done for kids....make him do it. Make him step up. This allowed me to take my power back and I'm much happier.

[@Ari-ge5cp]

@@Makeupbydanyel_ Girl, thank you. I need big hard core advice. No candy coating this. Anybody reading this is more than welcome to give me some advice.. .. My Bf son will be turning 7 on August. He hasn't saved a cent! I feel hes gonna ask me to pay. But he was the one with this idea of renting a place like chukie chesse but private. I told him to talk to his baby momma. Apparently the mother is just doing the arrangements for the tables. How will i say No to him in a well mannered way. I have no issue with words, but i do talk like a sailor. And after his son acted so disrespectful to me this past week i honestly just dont care at all. Im hurt and like you said, im not even close to a step mom, my bf at times dosen't understand that he can't promise things to children, they'll remember... Yes, what you said, he getting a lil lazy and probably wants me to do so much. Im stepping down! Doing that soa day, getting that hair trimmed etc .. idknow im sick

[@Makeupbydanyel_]

@@Ari-ge5cp I remember stepping up to do this and that for the well-being of my step kids - but at end of the day (not your responsibility to step up). I wish someone who had told me this - I had to figure it out for myself. STOP it. ✋️ his mother/dad will need to pay for the party. If not - won't be having one. I took my stepkids on trips, purchased bday & Xmas gift, did hair, attended school events to be supportive and now that they are teenagers...I realized none of it mattered. They will undermine you, be disrespectful etc.. sad to say I feel that I trained them to be users towards me. There's nice and have matters when they want something.... once they get it...it's back to the same bs. I know it hard to step back bc as a woman we want the best and we see things that the biological parents doesn't. Save yourself the headache and do not do it.

[@Makeupbydanyel_]

@@Ari-ge5cp if you start feeling depressed, sad, or angry...it's time to start disengaging by putting back on them. Yes, it's easier said then done, but its must. Remember, biological parents will always have the upper hand no matter what you do or say. So treat it as such.

[@lspsincerelyc22]

Thank you for sharing this. I dont know another stepparent personally, so I’ve felt quite lonely lately not being able to talk to sonebody else who can relate to my situation. So thank you for sharing this 💜

[@geovannasouza9438]

When you said “idk how it is to be in a split family” says everything. People will never understand what the child goes through, how is a child supposed to learn something when in one house they says it’s ok and in another they say it’s bad? How is a child supposed to feel comfortable in their own home when it doesn’t feel like home?

[@BloomByCC]

Sounds like personal experience that is still painful.

[@Afarmer690]

My teenage stepdaughter runs my home and her dad is ok with this. He reprimands me in front of her when I try to set boundaries even for myself. Looking back, if I had known what I was getting into, I have to say that I would not have stayed in the relationship. I hate myself for feeling that way but I have to be honest with myself. My husband and I have had physical custody since she was 3 but I've been in the picture since she was about 1 and a half. I have come to understand that my frustration isnt with my stepdaughter, it's with her father. A teenager will behave however they are allowed to behave. Her father encourages the behavior because it's easier for him to ignore behavior problems than to apply consistent discipline. It's easier to just let her do whatever she wants. Since becoming a teenager, there have been issues with inappropriate texts/pictures being exchanged, blatantly defiance of household rules and expectations along with the normal teen growing pains. His response has been to either over discipline or ignore the behavior while expecting everyone else to just not bring it up. Being a bystander without having any say in the matter is the most helpless feeling I have ever known. As a mom, it's very difficult to stand back and watch. I have respect for stepparents who can make it work.

[@ashleynicole9423]

Thanks for sharing your story. I know this feeling all too well. Teenagers just might be the worse. Wait no, passive/guilty/ Disney dads are the worse. Sending hope your way...

[@Afarmer690]

@@ashleynicole9423 Thank you. I am sure that A LOT of blended families go through this kind of thing. I've made a lot of mistakes along the way too. But God it feels hopeless sometimes 😞

[@geovannasouza9438]

But stepmoms will find a reason to dislike their stepdaughters no matter what. Mine was all sweet and nice to me when I was 5, then her and my dad moved away to another country and had another child, and when I went to visit I was all exited to see her, my dad, and my little brother again. But when I got there I just found this monster who started treating me like I was trash. Every time my dad would take me to go somewhere fun she would be pissed off at him and me for days even if it was only for the short amount of time I was visiting him. Idk what happened to the sweet stepmother I met and liked. I guess children ruin you.

[@ashleynicole9423]

@@geovannasouza9438 Sometimes it’s not because of the step kid, but instead the dad or bio parent who doesn’t establish boundaries, discipline, or loads of other issues that cause friction between the stepmom and kid.

[@Afarmer690]

@@geovannasouza9438 I am so sorry you experienced that from your stepmother. Its unfair and I am so sorry you had to go through that. I dont think all step parents hate their stepkids but I can see from your perspective it might seem that way. My heart goes out to you. Every child deserves to be loved by their parents and/or step-parents.

[@robindoyle4460]

I have two girls who are 14 and 12 and my husband and I have a really good coparenting relationship with their father. My husband has an 8 year old son and zero coparenting relationship with his mom. We just had a baby together he is 1 month old. Everything you have talked about it’s exactly what we are going through with my step son and his mom! Hang in there! Being a step mom is definitely the HARDEST thing Ever!!!

[@12Nomzamo]

Being a step mother is challenging it has me questioning my marriage like the only time hubby and i fight is because of his child. I mean i met the child when he was 4yrs old and right now he's a teenager but things are getting worse i worry about my own child's safety and mine 😢

[@adithyanarayan27]

This are complication which will if u marry a person with child u should take the responsibility and face the struggle u knew what u where in for

[@ChelsGreen]

Amen! It suckssssss and you have no idea when you sign up for it. God bless you

[@geovannasouza9438]

Well first thing if you’ve met him when he was four and had a child with his dad he won’t harm your child.

[@MK8alt]

@@geovannasouza9438 i dont really see how y could know thst but okay!????.....

[@geovannasouza9438]

@@MK8alt I have four younger half siblings and even tho they are annoying and me and my stepmom hate each other I still love them and would never touch them or hurt them. Step moms just like to play victims and make it look like as if we are demons. They all say that. It’s not true for everybody both most of us understand our issues are with our stepparents and not our half siblings. Unlike most of you stepmother out there we don’t put the blame on the random child who has nothing do to with ur jealousy.

[@enishalihoward8119]

The key is patience. If you are patient you will survive if not please just walk away and save yourself the stress.

[@TheDominiqueDivine]

Its good to know that someone who seems to have it all together faves these problems too. I'm 7 years in a relationship with a man with kids, and they were already 6&7 when I came in. I was unable to conceive with my SO. The "good" I had to offer them was taken as bad, and the bad (my mental health) made everything unforgivable to them. My SO and I have a great relationship but the coldness and microaggressions from the kids are something I have to deal with from a completely powerless position. Its tough! And as a stay-at-home stepmom for a period spending all day with kids who arent wanting to deal with your presence, is arguably much harder then staying all day with kids who are happy to have you there, or view you as part of the family. It never really got better, if anything it declined, but they are cared for by both parents, and I do my best to show that I care even though its only met with eye rolls and annoyed grunts. Its the most frustrating situation I've ever been in because theres no solution. I definitely feel you! And its awesome to see someone making the most of a very delicate but at times- tumultuous situation.

[@erinaguilera2031]

DominiqueDivine_Lowbrow_artmaker Hey mama! You are amazing for what you do, and I hope you’e told often. It is no easy feat to be in this position, and you’re right sometimes it can feel powerless, and let’s be honest hopeless. BUT it’s not. You are a step parent you should and need to be respected, how that happens idk. My husband and I put eachother first, and a lot of the time my stepdaughter is more disrespectful to him. We both have each other’s back and make it clear we’re on the same team. In our home we do NOT tolerate the gossip, and yes as such a young age she tries to engage us and speak poorly about her mother when we all know how much she loves her. All you can do is your best, take a deep breath, and depending on the age, “you want to be disrespectful? Perfect, make your own breakfast/lunch/dinner, do your own laundry, etc”. I’ll be doing another video soon, hang in there.

[@kerri-jopatterson8976]

Sigh ... I’m dating a guy with a 7 year old that has no respect for adults ... thinks she is the boss and I genuinely don’t want kids with him because if my child sees that and tries to treat me that way there will be consequences!! He does not understand that kids are to be guided and quite honestly I can’t raise my kids that way

[@naturalebbie12]

Thank you for encouraging me, Erin! I just found your channel and you have helped me so much. Thank you for being so vulnerable. I just married in Sept and my step son is 4. Has been really challenging but It's getting better by the grace of God but it's taken me to take It day by day and week by week to get through it. But Im thankful to know that I'm not alone. Much love ❤

[@highlightshightops9008]

Thankyou so much for posting this. Your so honest about it. I have the exact same family structure as you and we deal with these same issues and I worry about sibling relationships in the same way, it’s so nice to hear another point of view and to know we all go through it as a step mom. Truly the hardest but very rewarding 🖤

[@992Eirini]

I'm a stepmom and it's hard to deal with these things. Thankyou for the video.

[@summerjoy247]

Be encouraged ❤ So many sad comments I pray that you all have a better experience as a stepmom. All children are a gift and I’m grateful I had a good experience growing up with my stepmom so I try to do the same 😊🙏🏽🙏🏽

[@FS02012]

One thing stepparents have to realizes don't think kids go away at 18 that's just in the movies generally they stay-at-home till at least 25 and when they do leave home they come back with grandchildren so don't think step kids just disappear

[@sensumei]

lol I am living that now

[@user-lv4ok9vo5o]

Not in my house they ain’t.

[@sensumei]

@@user-lv4ok9vo5o 😂 right on bro !!!

[@user-lv4ok9vo5o]

Fr tho. Graduation (if she graduates - she failed two years already) is in June. Happiest day of our lives. 🤩💯

[@sensumei]

@@user-lv4ok9vo5o Son!! You got screaming over here!! Definitely update us in June

[@geovannasouza9438]

Just don’t marry someone who has children if you have any doubts that you’ll try and get along with them. Just avoid the headache it will bring you and the trauma it will bring the child, and all the fights with ur husband. 👍🏼.

[@johnnyd5687]

So true. I know from experience DON’T DO IT

[@nadelina4154]

100% stay away from a man with kids.

[@foh9416]

@@nadelina4154 say this to men as well ! men need to stay away from women with kids right ? 😩

[@nadelina4154]

@@foh9416 yes. If you don't have kids. Don't date someone with kids.

[@Rayaelle]

@@nadelina4154 So single parents can never date again? Is it not harsh?

[@sandy4923]

I have a stepmother I wish she had the same mentality, I have always lived with the feeling that I'm less and rejected, always trying to be something else. Literally every day it is exhaustive at the same time I kind of grow a sense of compassion for her because I know that she cannot do better so I have to do it myself. There's always love at the end of the tunnel. Thanks for sharing.

[@meganelizabethwade]

I have step family but we made a rule to not use the word step. It cuts deep to some, my older sister is from my moms first marriage and my mama refused to let my dads family address her as a step grandchild.

[@juliannacolumbia7977]

Erin, Thank you so much for this video.. when you cried I felt it.. I’m dating a guy who has custody of his 6 year old daughter and I’m so scared for what our future might hold. She gets so extremely jealous of our relationship and I’m scared to move forward with him. I love him and his daughter very much and I’ve done so much for her but it’s so exhausting😭 your video made me feel not so very alone.. This is my first video I’ve watched on your channel and I hit subscribe about a minute in❤️💕 thank you!!

[@AmberlyPerez]

Needed this. I’m struggling bad today :(

[@geovannasouza9438]

My stepmom called me a plague and wanted my dad to kick me out of house at 17 yrs old. It’s ok we can struggle together. 😭

[@madiewilkes2710]

I really appreciated your vulnerability in this. I am a bonus mom myself and have been for the last 6 years. I treat my bonus daughter no different than my son and because of that, it has made me appear as though I am trying to replace the mom. At the end of the day I’m just trying to do my best that I can and like you said, transition days are the hardest. My bonus daughter’s mom wasn’t really in her life the first 5 years and now that she is, I feel like I’m losing my bonus daughter in a way. It’s been really tough but I’m learning how to navigate it now that her mom lives in the neighborhood next to us. I ask for for strength from God literally everyday because I love my husband and bonus daughter so much. I just didn’t realize how tough it would be. My husband is also a bonus dad to my son so we are double coparenting. I like to think and hope that God really does give his hardest battles to his strongest warriors. Thank you for your message ❤

[@btsarmyforever3816]

This is why before entering a relationship with a person who already has children? Must think a 1000 times. A new relationship is already difficult enough. If the children were adopted to begin with, problems are 50% less since child's bio parents are usually out of the picture. That's a very rare case scenario though. Also younger children are usually not that easy to raise since their mindset is fragile and they are easily influenced. As such, the bio parent has a stronger hold on them. Child is more likely to believe anything bio parent tells them than what the stepparent tells them. I don't really understand why any man or woman would put them through this. Its hard on both the stepparent and stepchild.

[@peeweepixie3655]

Honestly, grew up having a step mom AND step dad... and then as an adult my dad got divorced and remarried so I gained ANOTHER step mom and I can't stand her. I'm 28 so it shouldn't bother me so much, but it feels like my dad just up and got a new family and left me and my sisters in the dust. He even adopted her two annoying kids because their father passed. She was so nice at first, but as soon as they got married her demeanor towards my sisters and I changed. She's very know-it-all and sometimes has a snotty vibe. I can't freaking stand it. I hate to say it but my other step parents are awful too. I really don't like step parents. My biological parents have awful taste in partners. lol.

[@vanessadamian2293]

Thank you so much for your advice. This is my situation right now. You’re so strong and amazing!

[@pralinechocolates1]

I just had THE biggest argument with his 15yr old daughter, she has a habit of taking these that are not hers. He and I been together 14yrs this month and the 17yr old never gave me a chance. So we don’t say much, And I’m ok with that. She can take money out of my hand, and meals I have prepared but that’s about it. I need a break.

[@samanthachildress1091]

Girl I feel you on this! I get one word answers from his 14 year old and when I try to have Conversation with her she just looks at me like im crazy. Has it gotten any better for you a year later?

[@angelsrosena]

Let’s everybody know that IT WAS A CHOICE YOU MADE you can GET OUT OF IT when you want to.

[@erinaguilera2031]

Lol

[@mamamcalister5411]

Girrrrlllll.... I know you are trying really hard to kind of generalize what is “being said” but I am already knowing!! I am a step mother of an 8 year old and I have been there since he barely turned 1. It is still a struggle with his mother to. THIS. DAY!! I feel you and my heart goes out to you.

[@ambarlujan5674]

I just found out you have a channel, but I just wanted to say you are handling this with SUCH class. Keep up the good work.

[@Cindylatina93]

Omg I can relate soo much I had to tear my love but in a good way that you get it thank you soo much for sharing this and being positive even though sometimes some exes are very toxic or just jealous of the relationship they have with the stepchild like they are going to loose their kids or something and puts a burden on the relationships itself but thanks ❤️

[@CMThursdays]

Thank you soooo much for sharing!

[@Ari-ge5cp]

Advice needed!!! I dont consider myself a step mother at all. However, I'm with a man that has a 6 year old son. In the beginning it was beautiful, he the son was still in diapers and was the sweetest baby boy to me. This past few weeks that I've seen my bf son hes changed. He was very rude to me. We went to the park and with his feet pushed sand to my shoes, he said for me to put on my sunglasses because I looked better with them on, he made remarks of my appearance. Eventually, I wanted to cry. Im a child of divorced parents I understand him, I saw my mother n father make a new life with new partners. For me it was hard when I was a teenager and one parent had a new partner. I suffered. I respect my bf very much. I try not to hug him or show affection too much. Its hard because now I hardly see my bf. He moved to a different city and we are now really far away. Only see each other 2 times a week. It is temporary. This weekend While we were having lunch I cursed in front of his son. My bf scolded me in front of his son and other members of his family. I wanted to cry of anger. I wanted to run. Im a generously loved person that had many details with his son..... but i think ive had enough. For my wellness Im thinking of telling him we should spilt in peace. Im chronically ill and cant change . My bf, i accepted him how he is. Trust me lots going on with his attitude that ive accepted till today..... Should i tell him about how his son treated me this weekend???

[@travaevasser5138]

Run! God is pushing him far away from you for your protection.

[@nesminra8982]

Girl run... Pls. That's a sign!!

[@shashamarie4760]

I feel like I'm the only stepmom here without my own child. Is anyone in the same situation as me? It's very difficult and sad.

[@rebekahhjermstad279]

I am, it’s tough.

[@shashamarie4760]

@Rebekah Hjermstad there ate good and bad days. Hopefully better days for both of us. 🙏

[@A2Z11tree]

I’m a stepmom who has never been aloud to meet her stepdaughter. The girl came out of nowhere after my husband and I got married. The girl was a one night stand resulting in a baby and she pretty much refuses to acknowledge my husband is now married with our twins on the way even though we’ve tried to be more than reasonable with her... it sucks.

[@ashres10]

I can feel both sides bc I would never want to share my child. At the end of the day I think I would rather a good woman, such as yourself who you has a good home, rules, healthy food and good discipline to help raise my child rather than a random person who could be all sorts of mean. So many people just don’t want their Ex to move on so they hurt the child. It’s usually a jealousy issue. But I’m happy it’s getting better for you guys. Your step daughter is beautiful.

[@erinaguilera2031]

Ashli Ann ugh I can’t even imagine sharing my child either so I totally get it, it’s so sad what jealousy and immaturity does. I just hope things change, Phoenix is totally aware and shares that people don’t tell the truth.. so it’s sad for her. But I know I’ll make her proud when she’s older, and I’ll continue to do my best for her. Thank you for your kind words babe!

[@ashres10]

Erin Aguilera I agree and you can tell how much you love her.

[@Topself24]

I want to see a stepmom story where the father has full custody and the biological mother has no visitation. Has anybody experienced that?

[@khadijhaf4400]

I would love to hear that too

[@Alisunshinee1]

So proud of you! You did such a great job at sharing your story while also being respectful of all parties involved. You’re a classy gal and you’re doing amazing! Phoenix will always love you but most importantly when she’s old enough to know better and have a full grasp on the big picture she will appreciate you so much and everything you do for her! ❤️

[@erinaguilera2031]

Alison Keeney thank you so much, I try and focus on that.. when she’s older she will really understand and appreciate it all. I’m so glad you loved it

[@melaniemorales33]

Oh my goodness, it’s like you’re reading my mind 😭 can we be friends?! Let’s start a step mom group!

[@carinekeza6754]

I saw a lot, it’s only God who gave me strength in this 4 years. If I decide to leave 1 day I promised to myself I will have a boyfriend and we won’t share a house we will be meeting as needed that’s it. Let keep doing what we think is right even if they don’t see or like it but at the end it’s God who pays good👏🏾❤️

[@aliciagilardi5772]

Im a step mom and mother and this life is crazy.. I’m pregnant again and my hormones are through the roof, I have 3 step kids and a daughter. I do love my husband with all of my heart, but I feel bad some times because I favor my daughter just because I’ve been there since day 1 and my kids have this baggage because their mother left them for drugs and reappears every so often.

[@namelessmakeup5424]

Thats so fucked up. You even acknowledge that you favor your daughter. You don’t deserve to be their stepmother

[@jade8107]

Just found you from steph Willis! Im so happy I found your channel! You’re an amazing mom. Being a mom is hard enough. I’m glad you’re being positive bc you’re awesome! Many couldn’t handle this situation the way you are. Can’t wait to see what the future holds for you! Hoping to see more videos 🥰

[@erinaguilera2031]

Linh Styes it’s the toughest job ever but I’m so lucky, thank you so much. I’m so excited to share my journey with you! And I love Steph she’s such a beauty inside and out

[@neleluisa9210]

thank you for being so open and honest! this helped me a lot

[@onelildee]

How is her father? He agrees with your decisions? How lucky.

[@adithyanarayan27]

Just wanted to know why u guys don't date a person who is childless.childless people are very few in Todays time just wanted to know

[@VannesaCristabell]

Thank you for sharing this with us!!! I needed to hear this ❤️🙏🏻

[@ronniebelloir8147]

Hay. You. Whent. Sex

[@jessicagordon4427]

Thank you for sharing! I’m a step mom & having a challenging time. 😞

[@HillaryAlex]

Proud of you for speaking your truth with grace💗 I respect the hell out of you you’re going to help so many in similar situations! Love you

[@erinaguilera2031]

Hillary Alex thank you so much sis! Like ways and I love you and hope I can help others in my situation 😘😘

[@akire3.14]

You’re brave to be candid.thank you

[@Alleyomalley13]

OMG, I SO needed this. It’s really hard for me to think things will get better. Being a step mom is SO hard. I’m a combat veteran (which doesn’t necessarily mean much) and being a step mom is harder than trying to stay alive. My husband and I have been together for awhile, he is 33 and I am 25 and my husband has been married twice before me. He has 4 children 5 if you count the child his 1st wife had before they got married which, he fathered since birth until their divorce. His oldest lives with us full time from his first marriage and he is 14 and his half brother (bonus kid from before they got married that he raised) is 16. He has a daughter who is 9 from a one night stand with a woman from his home town and he has two other children, son (8) and daughter (6). I catch so much flack being a young girl with a man with so many kids from literally everyone. “Oh is this your brother or sister or cousin”. I miss out on birthdays and family holidays because the biological mother doesn’t want her kids to get to know me or they don’t want to get to know me themselves. I’m not trying to make myself a victim or anything like that but being a step-mom is so tiring and not rewarding when any time you THINK you might be able to meet your 9 year old step daughter her mom forbids you to spend Christmas with your family and your personal family is too far away to celebrate or they went on vacation for that Christmas so you spend all day alone at home while your husband and oldest son have dinner and open presents. Or birthdays, you’re not invited because the ex wife feels threatened or when you ask your 14 year old to do the dishes or stop back talking and he screams at you that “you’re the worst step mom ever and wishes you never married his dad and he has a mom so he doesn’t need you and just because I married his dad doesn’t mean he has to be respectful or do what I say”. When your family asks about your kids and all you can say is that they’re doing good and they’re with their mom during the holiday or their birthday and that’s why they’re not with you for whatever reason. Which is always a lie but it’s really all you have. When you husband struggles financially when he gets laid off and you pick up all the bills after being a stay at home mom and your 14 year old says you don’t pay for or do anything for them and their dad is the only one who buys stuff when their dad was unemployed 9 months of the year and you maxed out all your credit cards so they could have a birthday and they had gifts for Christmas so they could have normalcy. When your 14 year old ONLY text you about spending money and demands $30/$50/$100 for games on their phone or Xbox which you paid for and they never say please or thank you and they never ask you but demand it. When you try to ground them for being disrespectful and your husband has so much self hate that he doesn’t take up for you and says he will “talk to them” which only makes matters worse and he doesn’t have your back on punishments for your step children so you literally just suffer the hatred they speak to you. When your 14 year olds mother does nothing for you, won’t speak to you, hasn’t spoken to her son in 3 years and stands him up on every holiday then magically appears, she calls you every name in the book and says “you have no right to speak to or ask MY son to do anything and he doesn’t have to do anything to tell him to” then she texts your husband and says he needs to “leash your bitch”. I can’t have my children of my own so being in a position where you love the father and he’s hurting mentally and you are being tormented by his ex wives and their children is so upsetting. The 6 & 8 year olds are heaven. Even my beautiful step daughter asked if she could start calling me mom. Which melts me immediately. Her mom doesn’t like me yet but she and her brother make me feel like I’m at least a human. I wish I had support from other mothers. It’s so hard being a step mom when you feel alone and the odds seem to be all against you.

[@erinaguilera2031]

Alexandria Branson first off, you’re amazing for what you do. They will appreciate it when they’re older (what you do for them). As far as holidays go you should definitely never be discluded from hanging out with your husband. My husband and I always put each other first. If the other mom doesn’t like it that you’re around that’s too bad because you’re the wife you get to be around she doesn’t have a say she’s no longer anything but the child’s mother. That’s just ridiculous. As far as respect, there should be zero tolerance for that nonsense you are a step PARENT, and should be treated as such. Have you considered not doing anything for them anymore and see how everyone likes it?(the older ones). I wouldn’t deal with the ex’s they’re lucky to even have you. As far as holidays and birthdays go, I would recommend a court order and everyone has to follow it, so sometimes you will have them for birthdays and holidays and sometimes you won’t. BUT you and your husband should always be spending them together. It causes so so so much stress at times, but it can also be rewarding with being a step parent. Seeing them behave well (knowing you did a part in that), they wanting to call you mom is the sweetest (mine asks to call me mommy all the time although she knows her mom doesn’t approve), but it’s when they see you as such a figure it feels nice because it’s HARD. Most children in that situation aren’t the easiest to deal with due to going back and forth, and a lot of time parenting conflict. Keep your chin up, you ARE respectable and should be treated as such. I’ll be doing another video soon!

[@Alleyomalley13]

Erin Aguilera I wish I didn’t feel so defeated and so dumb for everything going on in my family. I’ve really considered making my own videos about it just because my husband can never find out I’ve talked to anyone or reached out to people for comfort. My husband is in “recovery” which I knew in the beginning of our relationship and I truly believed he was in “recovery” however, I very quickly found out that he wasn’t making an effort to stay sober in any way and has admitted to being extremely selfish. I met my husband when he was sober and fell in love with him when he was sober and it has been a roller coaster ever since. I’ve tried not doing anything for our oldest because of all the disrespect which just causes so much more hatred. His mother recently said that he could put her credit card on his iPhone for expenses but was only allowed $20 a month and in the first few hours of it being on there he spent over $100 so I stopped accepting his charges on the apple family. He retaliated and said it didn’t concern me what he bought on his phone and I asked to see purchases because I wanted to put it in perspective to his father to see how much he’s really spent in the last year but our son wouldn’t do it and my husband wouldn’t put his foot down. Holidays are probably never going to change because even his parents don’t allow me to go to the visits the exes go to in fear they won’t get to see their grandkids. My husband is still in a nasty custody battle with his youngest two which we had 50/50 custody of but last October he tried to pick up the kids from school and the school called the police to let them know he was intoxicated (he had severely relapsed and when I questioned his odd behavior he blamed it on his heart condition which I could believe but found out I was wrong) so she took the kids back immediately and now I haven’t seen them since last October and we pay $400 twice a month for my husband to see the youngest kids in supervised visitation and he’s added me to the list to visit but their mother doesn’t want the kids to build a real relationship with me so she doesn’t accept the request. Also if I am seen during their FaceTime she immediately hangs up and texts him that them seeing me is not allowed. When she came to our house last thanksgiving I had to stay in our locked bedroom closet (which was easily another room) in case the kids came up to see if I was there. About a month ago my husband went to jail for public intox and domestic abuse for the first time and I was able to escape but all of my family has left me and not allowed me back in their lives even after offering me a safe place to stay until I could get control of my life so now I am back in my husbands parents house with him after getting evicted 3 times in one year.

[@Alleyomalley13]

Erin Aguilera I know you’ll probably wonder why I even married him if he was getting so bad but I really felt like it was life or death if I didn’t and I honestly had nowhere else to go. He has a bad history which I quickly found out after he went to jail for the night from everyone and his and my entire family turned their backs on me. I come from a catholic family and they refuse to accept if I want a divorce and even mentioning it gets me shunned. I’ve caught him cheating on me (literally this past Sunday he was texting new women from work nsfw pictures and texts) of course I shouldn’t have looked but when his demeanor changes and he’s treating me like he’s out for my blood I know he’s done something wrong and I caught him with pills and I was furious and when he passed out I found out he was talking to over 5 girls and they had no idea I was his wife or he was married and last Wednesday he sent me a picture while at work and he didn’t have his wedding ring on and lied about it. Which I quickly proved him wrong which then he became extremely defensive and hateful toward me. Yesterday I finally got my VA disability rating and I’m afraid to get divorced because I’m not sure what he would do to me. He’s gone after his exes in the worst ways possible and is in a position where he can find me if I relocate or get a different job. It’s pretty difficult to even grasp. Thanks for letting me vent and I’m looking forward to more of your videos.

[@onenighttoremember]

@@Alleyomalley13 I know this is hard and it's been 7 months and I don't usually comment int his things... But you should just get out of there. There are associations that help women like you. You need mental help too to get you back on your feet. About divorce, it exists because we have evolved in society so that you don't have to be under no rules of religion. God doesn't expect you to be unhappy, but happy.

[@alexisasher9010]

I’m a stepdaughter , trying to find videos for my stepmother . All I can find are videos like these , so I’m coming here to ask other stepmoms. Me and my stepmother has always had problems , she physically abused my stepsister, years ago , but it still effects all of us (which is one of my besties) and now a days she’s just throwing chairs >denting brand new fridge > and tearing out a handing light with leg of chair , has been caught hitting my father multiple times . And now her direction is in my way . I’m 19, just moved in with my father , I just graduated in may . I was in college bc I had the expression my father was going to pay: but my stepmothers decision is “he’s not going to pay for yours then have to pay for everyone else’s” but yet my father payed for hers. She don’t work . Me and my stepsister clean the whole house Daily, and still get bitched at for doing minor things wrong : yesterday I got called a low life (bc I smoke) but she did about 2 months ago too! She put a screen door on her tho rn that says IM CHRISTIAN but “not”really , she also said I use my father - then proceeded today when I cooked a cake with my little sister to tell me I’m not allowed cooking bc this is her house and I’m a bitch . I really need advice guys , I’m tired of this toxic household .

[@ashleynicole9423]

You’re 19. If the household is toxic move out.

[@user-lv4ok9vo5o]

Alexis, I would be willing to talk to you. I could give you her perspective.

[@alexisasher9010]

@@user-lv4ok9vo5o Go ahead

[@alexisasher9010]

@@ashleynicole9423 it’s not that simple , I can’t just move out without a job or a car ??

[@user-lv4ok9vo5o]

has your stepmom, or anybody in your family, been in therapy or diagnosed with any disorder?

[@thanyaavalos7329]

I feel we’re your coming from I’m a step mom for a 11 year old and me and her dad have been married for 6 years and till this day her mom makes it so hard for me to just be a stepmom I don’t know her she has never meet me! I just wish she would give me a chance and grow up! Some days I feel like giving up and getting a divorce! I have 3 kids of my own and I really don’t like how they feel about everything that we have to go thru just for us to be in my step daughters life.

[@cybilebenedict]

Omg thank you so much for the advices 🤗

[@onelildee]

I just need some help. I dont have children. Only stepchildren.

[@faithvorwald8872]

onelildee I’m in the same boat as you. 3 step kids and overwhelmed... I feel I do to much.

[@user-lv4ok9vo5o]

Nacho kids academy.

[@PsychoKern]

Thumbnail is literally screaming: "I'M ALWAYS STUCK step-son! Help me!"

[@asusenarobles]

I have been trying to understand that both my husband and stepson have struggles. I've been trying to be the perfect stepmom and wife by doing everything for both... 10 years later I exploded, it was getting heavy and I need help. I mean now I have two of my own and two adult men in my house (my husband and stepson) whom still "need" me to do everything for them because I let it get to this point. The worst is that if I need help around the house, I'm told that I have no say towards my stepson... I have no say but I'm still expected to do all this. I want to find a solution to this so we can stay together before thinking of leaving and just finding out we had a chance.

[@MK8alt]

absolutely the best video on utube ever. Iam a stepmom 2 2two children. 10 and 12. ive been in thier lives since 2016 I met them in October 2016 i have kids too Zoey Josh n Manny. I am facing bs from bio mom....and kids r disrespecting me. Im done. i just told my husband I wont be here when his kids come over until they learn to respect me. Iam afraid what this may do to my marriage but im so tired of being disrespected

[@MK8alt]

Like this stuff we deal with is insane. I have watched these kids grow up and parented them and all while my boys are deing raised by thier dads i dont get to see my own kids but i have the great pleasure everyweekend of being your on call babysitter but guess what not anymore. The kids are going to mom now anx jusg twisting what goes on and telling mom ou business our bad on us but we have these kids everyweekend?

[@user-lv4ok9vo5o]

Stand your ground, Susan, or you will be their walking doormat the rest of your days.

[@MK8alt]

@@user-lv4ok9vo5o thank you for your words of encouragement. I know that it would take alot for me to leave. But I know I can and would if I had to. I am starting to notice an alliance firming between my step daughter and I, its not an easy calling but Im certain it is a calling so, I do my best to serve these kids to my best of my abilates, not easy when in a perfected teaching moment Dad puts on Bad Moms xmas 2!!? Wtf...i digress, I see it 4 what it is now. THE DEVIL HIMSELF... alive and well, ♡♡♡♡ tx again

[@HopelessObserver]

Thank you so much for making this video💜

[@jeweltalktv]

Beautiful video thank you so much for your truth!!!

[@slim8738]

It started off great the kids were a bit younger but now they are grown,the young adult felt the need to verbally disrespect me calling my son names and saying this is her fathers house and he supports me.She called me names and cursed at me and her dad sat and watched.She seeks attention and is very vindictive.I will never date a man with kids ever again in life !it’s the worst kids I ever came across

[@yaratzedalamosantiago5128]

Me and my boyfriend have a nice relationship with my baby daddy and his girlfriend, but I think I will have tough time with my boyfriend baby mama. He is fighting for 50/50 custody and she is not happy about it.

[@arianafigueroa3132]

Stepmom to stepmom! THANKS! Xoxox

[@JenniferVidinha]

Second this. Needed this so bad.

[@johnnyd5687]

It’s going to get so much worse as she gets older. My step kids are 14 & 16 now and it’s been horrible the entire time. Ive been with their mom for 12 years and have tried EVERYTHING to bond with them. Nothing works. RUN!

[@umisunderstood_]

I'm literally in the same boat kinda, it's so hard, I have 3 kids of my own and have a step child. It can seriously take a toll on you and I noticed that and what it was doing to me and honestly if you ever want to talk about it cause I know I would like to have someone to talk about being a step parent and how it can be difficult at times...

[@erinaguilera2031]

Umisunderstood _ I’ll be doing another video soon. It is very hard, it takes a lot of patience and understanding and a lot of taking the high road. Do what’s best for you and your family the best you can. It definitely takes a toll. You are not alone though, control what you can do your best and forget the rest.

[@twyllernakogee578]

This is me and my dad 👨‍👦it was so post to be me and him and this happen 👨‍👩‍👦‍👦👭two boys and two sisters out of nowhere and a stepmom my ducking life is ruined no of my stepmom she broke my pinkey I tried to show my dad in stead but I showed my mom I was lucky by her friend was.........She kick me and she threw something at me that’s why I hate stepmoms

[@DesireeAnnaC]

Please do a vlog or update! This is so helpful. Thanks

[@brookzaengle1210]

New subscriber here 💕💕 beautiful inside and out !

[@777nicole]

Can I ask how you cope with or if you or your husband communicates with the ex? That’s something I can’t deal with personally. I’m way too possessive/jealous to be completely honest. In my mind I feel that if I had a kid with someone I would never lose feelings for them. Especially knowing that the relationship ended on her behalf . I don’t know if feelings go away that easy and I really struggle even with the whole reality of it.

[@bongiwesylviakunene5524]

im like that also..God help us.

[@chrissymullins1579]

I am like this also

[@user-lv4ok9vo5o]

I hate my ex and show lots of affection to my wife. Wife isn’t jealous at all.

[@AmbitiousPanda739]

The man I am dating atm has a baby on the way (unplanned). I love him very much and our connection is unreal. I have anxiety about the situation but you can’t help who you love. This video is helpful. Some days I don’t know if I should run or pursue this love. I worry about my mental health.

[@khadijhaf4400]

I'm in this same situation. Only difference we been together for 5 years and broke up and block each other. One night stand from him turn into him being a baby daddy. Baby is due in November And I agree for us to work out, but I don't know where to even start with how to prepare for this and questions that should be ask to verify if we can work out

[@samanthamorones6989]

So happy you’re finally back! Can’t wait for all the tea and seeing your channel grow 😍 #FavMama&BonusMama

[@erinaguilera2031]

Samantha Morones thank youuuu! Ugh I’m so happy to be back I hope you love it all🖤🖤

[@BloomByCC]

Thank you so so much!

[@lisaskew]

🤗 your such an awesome mom and people can see that you love both those kiddos sooo much❤️

[@erinaguilera2031]

Lisa Askew thanks buddy I love you!! I appreciate youuuu

[@BloomByCC]

If you haven’t read Stepmonster please do! It’s a brilliant and often funny book by a family therapist who thought she’d had it all figured out… until she became the stepmonster. By Wednesday Martin Ph.D.

[@amandaivywellness]

Thank you for this, so so helpful xx

[@amandaivywellness]

P.s. you are definitely the bigger person 😁 and seem like an amazing step mumma x

[@EmsEssentialsxo]

so glad you are back girl!! love all your vids!

[@erinaguilera2031]

EmsEssentials thank you so much babe! I’m glad to be back 🖤

[@GollyFancies312]

Well they kinda have the right to be angry and get dry when a Radom women who they have mostly likely never meet before try’s to claim those kids as mom and without the real mother there the kids would not be there. Most orthodox mothers do not want there kids around a women who there x married because they obviously are the ones who birthed them and made so many sacrifices to make sure that baby came out healthy. Moral of the story don’t get involved in kids lives if there not yours let the mom who birthed them and made them handle it.

[@alisonleigh100]

It’s “their”, not “there”. Also, are you suggesting that a father should never be able to remarry?

[@trishat550]

Does anyone know of any good online support groups they can recommend to stepmoms, especially first time/childless stepmom? I googled some but doesn't seem to be much.

[@sharad7340]

@@mentalmermaid really

[@taeziah936]

Thank you for this

[@Calejandre138]

I lived in a separated home and my first daughter unfortunately did also when she was 1 and I had 50/50 custody with her dad. It has been a rough 16years it’s definitely hard to go through for everyone I wish also I had a good relationship w my ex and his wife. But it’s hard to get others to change there ways 😕 Can’t wait to see your day in the life videos and more content 😊 good luck with everything 💗

[@erinaguilera2031]

Calejandre138 thank you so much! It’s definitely hard especially when it doesn’t need to be for the child’s sake. Maturity is harder to come by as an adult then we think. I can’t wait to share and I hope you love the videos 🖤🖤

[@jayramirez4893]

You look beautiful

[@aulaniplumeria8819]

Thank you 💜💜💜💜

[@r3dpigi-yt512]

Only if my step mom saw this video and only if she didn’t destroy my whole family. Only if she didn’t make my dad completely delusional and only if she didn’t make him just like her. Only if she didn’t make me, my brother and my mister move out for the exact same situation, only if she realised that we hated her, only if my dad stopped closing his eyes in front of the problems that she created in my family, only if they didn’t get married.

[@simpleretirada1178]

For your words we can definitely understand the problem is you! .... how can you say you hate her ... you obviously have no respect! ... I am sure you were a nightmare for her!

[@user-lv4ok9vo5o]

You sound exactly like my daughter. I hope you are openminded enough to realize there is more than one side to your family situation. Placing blame on one person alone is a crackhead move on your part. You will never have reconciliation with your father if this is your mindset. The person you hurt most by acting this way is yourself - damage of your own making by your own hand. I’m sure your dad and stepmom are happy with you gone if this is your behavior, because ik my wife and I will be 💯 when my hateful, narcissistic kids are out of our home as well.

[@suckajas]

Thank you so much, you’re amazing!

[@erinaguilera2031]

Jassyjay thank you for watching, and thank you for that 🖤🖤

[@Twinkle23498]

This is no shade to you and I appreciate your situation is hard but why does nobody ever talk about how hard it is to see your child being raised by your ex and their new partner. I don’t want my child to have a step mom but it is happening against my will.

[@caseyhill636]

Doesn’t not being with your ex open up the possibility that he may date/get remarried? If you didn’t want someone else in the picture, you should have stayed together.

[@janisemills1]

That doesn’t make sense… the only way to prevent that is to stay with the man you made a child with…. Because he can always remarry and make more children.

[@qbanz00]

White ppl version of “baby mama” lol

[@geovannasouza9438]

Poor stepmothers 😢 it’s not like the children are the ones stuck with them and can’t get away from it until they turn 18.

[@FS02012]

Who says that's that kids leave the house at 18 what movies are you watching? Generally people don't leave home till least 25 or 26 until they have money and they're mature and they're financially and mentally capable just because you're in a step family doesn't mean that you have to throw your kid out at 18

[@ashleynicole9423]

You have no idea what it’s like. Other people’s children can be monsters. They are fueled by jealousy, anger, and guilt. Filled with rage and hurt. Some children maliciously sabotage, target, and hurt the step-parent. Your sarcasm is laughable. Just hope and pray it’s never you on the receiving end.

[@FS02012]

@@ashleynicole9423 here is a concept u are invading into the child home! If you feel that way find someone else without children! Simple. It is not worth suffering and stress for that piece of hot-dog stick.

[@ashleynicole9423]

@@FS02012 I wasn’t responding to you but yes I know that. Everyone has their own situations as to why they choose to stay or leave. I have my own reasons. I have met the perfect man, except his small piece of baggage. His children. Divorcee’s need love too. And with so many marriages ending in divorce that’s a lot of single parents with kids. It’s a growing family dynamic so just leaving and “finding someone without kids” is not always so simple. There are so many other factors. Plus most of us don’t go into this lifestyle thinking the children will be a nightmare. We expect to be the replacement for the love the bio parent gave up. It’s only when you’re in too deep, sometimes engaged or married, or pregnant, that the truth is revealed. By then, simply leaving is not always the easiest thing. It’s something you can’t know unless you’re in it. Btw if my name is on the deed they are in MY home.

[@FS02012]

@@ashleynicole9423 well those kids will not be going anywhere! When they are grown come back with grandchildren! Learn to deal with it and love them as your own or leave! They are apart of him. Any children u have will be tied to these other children for life. This is why when you take marriage vows to your first spouse people need to try hard to make it work. Take marriage seriously. Not create step kids, half siblings step siblings where even the step kids end up sleeping together as they are not related etc, then remarried for the 3rd time etc. Btw you will also be spending your money on this little baggage he has! What's wrong with being alone? Just dating nothing! But if u choose a man or woman with kids expect to be 2nd best not 1st!

[@pxnq624]

I hate my step mom she’s so annoying

[@erinaguilera2031]

Lol

[@rachaelslaugh8230]

Please do meal plans and cooking videos/recipes!

[@erinaguilera2031]

Rachael J. Okay 😘😘

[@n3rdpl0w]

Poor guy took the woman who “settled” after getting ran through

[@KarronAngel]

missed your videos xxxxxxxxxxxxx

[@erinaguilera2031]

KarronAngel aw thank you! I’m happy to be back🥰