The Problem with Treating a Dog Like a Pet | Kim Brophey | TEDxUNCAsheville

Applied Ethologist and Dog Behavior Specialist, Kim Brophey, analyzes the issues with the pet industry and outlines a new dog training program that values a relationship based on mutual understandings rather than one based on dominance and control. Kim Brophey, CDBC, is an applied ethologist and owner of the Dog Door Behavior Center in downtown Asheville, NC. Kim’s 20-year commitment to family dog mediation has been recognized both nationally and locally, awarded the Association of Professional Dog Trainers Outstanding Trainer of the Year in 2009 and the Best Trainer Of WNC annually since 2013. Kim’s trademarked Dog L.E.G.S.® model is a groundbreaking new system for dog lovers to truly understand their dogs’ behavior. Through her upcoming official L.E.G.S.® book -Meet Your Dog, Canine Genetic Heritage Testing Software and app-The Dog Key™, L.E.G.S.® shelter program, and daily service to organizations and families, Kim is doing her part to facilitate an important paradigm shift in our relationships with our dogs. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx

[@robinwiley7166]

My parents were both farm people and I was taught by them that animals must be given time to approach us not the other way around. In my 65yrs of life have never been bitten by a dog. I also work with children on the autism spectrum. I find the respect that I was taught as a child for animals is till the same respect for all living beings.

[@caradu9973]

Robin Wiley maybe that's where I got my respect for animals at a young age I had a lot of experience on farms yep taught to respect animals

[@herahagstoz6934]

Same! Body language, environment, and patience is key in all safe interactions with animals wild or domestic. You will get educated in one way or another and it is astonishing how many millions of people have no clue about this. The impulse seems to be fear or aggressiveness; I am over you, you are my prey or I am afraid of you, please don’t hurt me...usually both approaches get a negative response.

[@Docinaplane]

I was running along a country road when suddenly I was attacked by three pit bulls. I was bit. Fortunately my martial arts training saved my life, and I held on till some car came along so I could get away from there. And no, I didn't try to run away. I did nothing to provoke the dogs. What's respect got to do with that??

[@jeniwatkins3297]

@@Docinaplane you were not the caretaker or "owner" of those dogs. So not a great analogy. She's referring how to treat dogs, especially your own but, to always respect any dog/animal. It sounds as if the owner of those dogs had not been caring and lovingly trained them. Had they, you would not have been attacked!

[@Docinaplane]

@@jeniwatkins3297 No, I think the owner trained them to fight, and then when he was done with them, turned them loose and abandoned them on that road. Then I just happened to come along. Bad day for me, worse day for them.

[@donnale3881]

My dog and I went to puppy school, he loved learning. The first thing our trainer taught us was respect, and the importance of dignity. Never once was there pushing, pulling or degrading in any way. My dog and I learned to communicate with each other, a mutual respect. He lived for 17 happy years, and because we learned how to communicate, I was able to keep him safe.

[@David-wg7iq]

I've only been bit by breaking up dogs fighting...

[@DougZaga]

@@David-wg7iq Am I missing something? Your comment makes no sense in addition to the OP.

[@jennymcmillin5668]

Donna E Beautiful. You were a truly good companion for her. I home cats. I never say in their owner; I’m not. In their person. Sounds like you lived into being your dog’s person friend. Good on you!

[@David-wg7iq]

@@DougZaga I think you've got it. I've been had.

[@DougZaga]

@@David-wg7iq LOL...I just can't understand your comnment in relation to her message. Maybe I am missing something?

[@v.a.3058]

Totally agree! The only "training" I did with my dogs was when they where puppies, crate training. Once they learned you don't pee or poop inside the house the rest was a spontaneous development. I spend plenty of time talking to them as if they where children. I use simple, concise and most important consistent words and phrases for specific actions or things. For example, "Let's go night night" they get up and go to their beds...automatically without fuss or complaint. "Who wants to go for a ride?" and they drop whatever they are doing and wait by the door to get in the convertible. "Hey get off the couch" (in a normal tone) and they get off the couch. "Who wants a treat?!" and they shift to overdrive to come and get it as fast as possible. When they are in the yard, it's a big yard, I whistle the same every time and they make their way to the kitchen door and so on and so on. Dogs are so much smarter than people give them credit for....they are definitely smarter than some/most people! Their range of emotions is the same as humans. They can be happy, angry, SAD!, scared, confused, elated and so much more. One day I was in the driveway fixing my mower, I had my tools out and hands under the hood while Chuck and Rudy sat and watched me the whole time. A screwdriver fell and began to roll away and before I could walk over to pick it up Chuck stood up, walked a few steps and brought it back to me. I did not have to command him to do anything but he knew that I was busy and would appreciate his help. That day, not long ago, I realized the connection with my dogs is as profound and complex as any relationship I have with humans. That is why it's so important treat them with love and consideration because that is how they will treat you.

[@sandracaputo2917]

That is so wonderdul!!!

[@smalldogsolutions3844]

To me, that is training. Teaching, explaining, sometimes showing by example, has always worked for me, and has transformed the behaviour of dogs I helped.

[@troiaguirre9747]

Mine do the same. They know when they are going to be told to get in their kennel when I lock the back door, They actually wait at the door of the kennel, until I give the command to go in. They also run to their beds when I tell them its time to go night, night. My dogs also know when I have some time to play and they bring me the toys to play fetch. They know when they might be going for a walk when I put on my exercise sneakers, and so I try not to get them excited by asking if they want to go for a walk only until I'm really ready to go. I don't want to break their hearts if I can't really go. They get so excited when I do finally let them know. I'm just always so amazed that they care about little old me when I get home or sit on the floor so they can jump in my lap and force my hand to pet them.

[@sarahmunson1778]

Absolutely, all of this. And the same goes for pigs, cows, chickens, turkeys, fish - the animals westerners consider "food."

[@linh811]

British and British trainers consider crate/kennel cruel and supposedly never use them

[@mitchryder9891]

My dog is abusing me. He constantly wants me to go get him food and refuses to clean anything. Walks right in the house and don't even wipe his feet. Always wants to go in the car but never offers to pay for gas or anything. The list goes on

[@jonathanjones635]

I love this comment

I get that from my dog as well .I had to put my foot down when he wanted me to wear the collar. Now he wants a dog sweater made by Nike .He won't wear puma because of the cat logo

[@adorablyadorable5665]

@@jmc4791 sounds like it doesn't it?......a good description.

[@my2centz545]

Have you seen the video on utube where the dog does all the household chores, wish my dog did chores 😜

[@daisylu5101]

@@my2centz545 Would you please find us the link? 🐕‍🦺🐩🦮 Someone told me about it also. I think a lot of us would love to watch it. Thank you. Greetings from California and blessings 💜 to all of you on this forum.🙋🏼‍♀️

[@st3llarfae]

I've thought this for most of my life. My family has had several dogs, and I would watch my little sister pick them up and hug them and hold them against their will. They'd be squirming and struggling to get away and sometimes even start growling because they didn't want to be held down, even if my sister was "just trying to love them". And then I would watch as my parents got angry at the dog for growling or snapping. Animals have feelings, thoughts, wants, and make choices just like we do. Yes, there are differences in the way their brains work but that doesn't make their feelings are any less valid or less deserving of respect.

[@babbslab]

Kristen eh we feed them, clean up after them, give them a home. we can hug them if we want

[@anaturals4335]

@@babbslab, you're right, you can hug them since you are feeding them. However, a stranger does not feed them and should ask you if you or your dog minds if he/she wants to pet them. Also, children have to be thought to treat all animals with respect, including their families' fur-babies.

[@sarahmunson1778]

So true, and that also goes for pigs, cows, chickens, turkeys, fish - the animals humans consider mindless "food" animals too.

[@judyives1832]

@@babbslab Nope. The dog has a choice if it wants to be touched. It did not ask you to buy it. It has no responsibility to make you happy. You don’t demand that from a child or a dog. It was your choice to bring that child or dog into your life. You owe them respect. They are living creatures that should own their own emotions.

[@glenj.taylor2938]

@@babbslab I can't really tell if you're serious or joking. Either way, you are absolutely incorrect. Did you not watch the video or learn anything from what the presenter said in the video? Please learn more. It'll benefit not only you but everyone and everything else you encounter in life.

[@lucyeron6511]

I have worked with animals for much of my life, I have been told "you talk dog". No, "I listen dog". I have raised puppies for the blind, the best I could do for those puppies is to permit them to become self-confident and self-disciplined. You can't force that on a dog, you have to permit them to get to that point. Each breed and each personality gets to that point in their own way. I have relied for years on a Service Dog to keep me alive. I always put her well being first, just as she has always put me first. People who have "pets" ask me how much do I charge to "train" their dog; my answer is nothing, but I do charge to train the person. You see the dog will do well in my home, but once they go back to the home they came from, many times they go back to what they learned from the people in that household. Most people don't even think about the fact that different breeds have different needs and personalities. Also, the same breed also have different personalities, like with humans, no two people or dogs have the same personality or needs. So if you want to be a good companion to your dog, please listen to them, they will tell you what they need and want.

[@vsrose]

Animals obviously don't use language to communicate, but they do communicate with their eyes, their responses, actions, and behavior towards people, things, food, etc. They also learn some human language/words and respond to it. And communicate with their voice through the sounds they make.

[@TrumanGN]

This leaves no doubt that what I have long believed is true: Most people should not own dogs because they do not truly respect dogs.

[@darkapothecary4116]

My dog cost me over 8 year nutrition knowledge

[@cristianobrayden8712]

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[@enochmarco448]

@Cristiano Brayden instablaster :)

[@cristianobrayden8712]

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[@sinetteiversen9978]

Absolutely.Respect is everything.If you dont respekt other creatures,do cannot expect to be respected

[@myopinionwhileIcanstillhaveone]

The animals on factory farms and in slaughterhouses feel too. They are scared and mutilated. We should respect all animals.

[@jilligain3409]

rozynmike couldn't agree more

[@LITTLEMUSTANGFILLY]

"Factory farms" Are not the torture shows you think they are and the bad ones are not as common as the media would have you believe. Themedia are out to get their next story. They want something dramatic to keep viewers watching so, they take things out of context and twist it to make it look scary. Why don't you ask to go on a tour of an industrial scale farm. If you still hold the same opinion afterwards that's fine but at least you will have it because of what you saw with your own eyes not because of what you were spoon fed by a drama hungry media.

[@scorpionshape]

exactly what I was thinking

[@carey1121]

LITTLEMUSTANGFILLY I There's countless footage and evidence of cruelty going on in factory farms. This has nothing to do with the scaremongering media. Do you think being forced into a gas chamber with Co2 burning your insides out to death is not torturous?

[@myopinionwhileIcanstillhaveone]

LITTLEMUSTANGFILLY I've been to multiple factory and family farms. I've seen pigs drink each other's urine at a family farm because they didn't have access to water in 113° degree heat. I've been to a chicken factory farm where chickens were eating each other and it was a "organic" "free range" farm. I had to wash my hair 5 times to get the smell out. I've been to big and small slaughter houses. Animals are deprived of water and food for more than 48 hours. Even people on death row get a last meal. These animals are scared and want to live. Their living conditions are worse than what you can experience from watching the news.

[@lucibjlb]

Kim Brophey is exactly correct. I'm a dog walker / pet sitter. I've also owned dogs my entire life. Dogs are pretty intelligent. In fact, they have the intelligence of a 3 or 4-year-old child. Dogs (like humans) must be treated with respect. Whenever I meet a new dog, I wait for him or her to approach me first. I've also learned that "closeness" takes time. It takes them time to get to know me, like it takes time for me to get to know them. It's based on trust and knowledge. I really wish people understood that dogs are very much like people. They have personalities, opinions, feelings...the list goes on and on. I'm glad she gave this talk. It's a long time coming.

[@PawsuasiveDogTeaching]

I thought this video was awesome. How ever I wish she would have stressed to get dogs proper teaching. A well taught dog is a very happy dog. The more you teach your dog the stronger the bond between you and your dog will be. And you do not need to cause pain to teach a dog. I personally do not use prong or shock collars or even choke chains. I prefer to have a harness on a dog when I teach them.

[@janetdonald9801]

How do you feel about pigs who are as intelligent as dogs, most spend their lives in crates after having their teeth and tails removed without anesthetic?

[@floribundafloribunda9985]

@@janetdonald9801 And what about horses, who are as intelligent as dogs and pigs? Nobody cares about horses who are really tortured in polo games and races

[@ko7302]

Amen.

[@ko7302]

@@floribundafloribunda9985 uhhhh I know about 4 people that rescue horses just in my county alone.. .

[@arthurstrout8730]

I've shared most of my 65 years with dogs and cats. Nothing compares to the mindful application of mutual respect with our four legged friends. The simple act of allowing your "pets" to be themselves can provide ways to share the best of quality times. Your four legged friend will love you for it. - Learn to love them for who they are. Your respect will be appreciated and returned. Not so complicated when we give it some thought.

[@aaronnelson6699]

I'd like to examine the stranger scenario at 5:00. I see people do nearly the same thing to infants and toddlers. Generally the person is a friend of the parents, but to the child, he/she is a complete stranger. "Oh my gosh! Look at you! So adorable! Aww, is somebody shy? Come here!" Some kids like the attention; others do not. I'm not saying this is good or bad. I just want to point out the similarity.

[@ultravioletpisces3666]

Very true

[@bowiekung9161]

too true. and the touching part... we feel it's ok to just touch a child's head, hair, pick them up, etc. the same respect we have for adults should translate to children. they're not cute objects we can do whatever we want to

[@mkl5448]

Very well said, I hope the right people watch this and make the necessary changes.

[@StarSong936]

Just to give a take off the title of this video, I have never treated any animal I was responsible for as a pet. All of the animals I've had were family. @6:27, I used to frequent a bar where one couple had a wolf. That wolf would come up to me and ask for belly rubs. The wolf was in charge of the interaction, and I always took my cues from her. If her owners called her back to them, I would signal the wolf to go to them. Note, a wolf is not a dog. If you treat them as a dog, you could wind up in a world of hurt very fast. I felt very privileged to have that level of trust. An add on to this, not about dogs, but cats. I was raised in part by a cat. I had 2 mothers, one was my biological mother, the other was a cat we called Miss Kitty. I helped Miss Kitty raise 2 litters of kittens every year, giving them their first hunting lessons, and teaching them how to interact with humans. Miss Kitty was with me every step of the way for about 14 years, before I left home and went into the military. She was 18 when she died. It frequently happened that she had her kittens on my bed, and I was the first human they interacted with, within hours of their birth. StarFire was my darling daughter. She was born in my storage shed, and abandoned by her mother as the runt of the litter. I took her in and bottle raised her. She used to sleep across my face at night. My room-mate at the time told me to kill her. He thought she would be too much trouble. About 2 months later, he admitted to me that he could not imagine what life would be like without her.

[@allanbrogdon7453]

My 5th grade teacher said "animals cannot think"I immediately said"yes they can".I had a dog save me from a kidnapping at 5.I probably wouldn't be alive if not for dogs.I am not yodas owner but his friend.14 and toothless half blind he will try to protect me against anyone or dog.I was ashamed I left him with my ex who neglected him.Never again.

[@DebiRose062]

Bravo! In his youth my husband learnt to ‘break’ horses. As adults, when we obtained an ‘unbroken’ pony for our daughter, we ‘gentled’ him. We must learn to evolve the education of all of our animals - it also wouldn’t hurt to do the same for our human children too.

[@ultravioletpisces3666]

I read so many books as a kid where a young girl who never tried to "break" a wild horse, amazes the grown men when she gains the animals trust and doesn't try to dominate the animal.

[@yarnpower]

Really good point that most dogs do not want physical touch from strangers, much like most people.

[@launabanauna8958]

yarnpower No it is not a good point, the woman in the video needs help.

[@aslmad1]

The example she gave was ridiculous and probably never happened, without the person being growled at. Peoole all know this.

[@ThisbeandPyramus]

I agree with you EXCEPT that I'd modify your statement to: "...many dogs do not want physical touch from strangers..." Some dogs do (especially when young) and some breeds are mostly made up of these types of dogs. The broader point is that people should stop forcing themselves on dogs they don't know. Ask the owner if the dog would appreciate a caress or if you're the owner say politely, "I'm afraid this dog doesn't enjoy touches from strangers"....etc. etc..

[@ThisbeandPyramus]

If you've ever lived in an urban environment and had a really attractive dog who didn't like strangers touching them - you wouldn't find that story far fetched. Strangers run up and force themselves on dogs all the time.

[@aslmad1]

ThisbeandPyramus oh brother, like I’m allows see dogs being molested...not. Enough already. We got bigger problems in the world

[@theshimmering2064]

My dogs continually surprise me. As one example, I always give my dogs a dental treat to chew in the evening around the same time every night. But just yesterday I said to them something I've only said maybe one other time, "Stop bugging me for a treat. Go ask grandma to give it to you." My mother wasn't in the room or anywhere near us when I said it, but they barked in excitement and went running for her expecting she would give them the treat instead even though it's always been me. This was not a well worn phrase they knew, nor did I get out of my chair, which would have tipped them off that I was going to get them what they wanted. I wasn't even fully aware they knew the grandma reference, but apparently they do. But there's been a lot of this in our home, starting early on from when one dog was young and I'd say something - a sentence - that she fully understood and responded to. The one who does this the most is always staring at me, all day long listening to me talk or just watching me even when I'm not talking. It's like she's learning or studying.

[@awesomesmasher999ftw4]

My daughter puts the phone to my dog's ear. I say, "Grandma is coming up." The dogs run to the window and watch for me to come.

[@nitanice]

I very intentionally taught my dog hundreds of words and put them in many sentences. Once she learned the concept, I was amazed at how many more she began to understand. And I let her teach me how to understand her as well. Just one example: she'd sit in front of the fridge if she wanted something to eat. I'd ask her, do you want rice, potatoes, eggs, cheese, etc. If she wanted potatoes, she'd get up and spin around. If I asked her if she wanted a baked potato, she'd sit if she didn't want that. Then I'd ask if she wanted mashed potatoes and if that's what she wanted, she'd get up and spin around. In this way, she could ask for one slice of cheese or two or three or for scrambled eggs or boiled or fried. She could tell me if she wanted yogurt or ice cream and what kind of ice cream. If you treat them like they're a person who is able to make choices in the short lives they live and listen to what they tell you as well, life's pretty easy.

[@deepti1709]

The same thing is with my cats. One of cats learnt by herself that one of the collages that I have hanging around has my dad in it. She would go sit beneath it and meow at it if she wants to talk to my dad. Then I need to call up dad, put him on speaker and both of them chat away happily. My dog has also learnt the best way to get my attention. She knows I hate it if she does anything to my books. So she will go and stand next to the bookshelf and then look at me if I am giving her attention. If not, she will paw at the shelf, no attention even then, she will paw at one of the books, nothing, she will pull out the book, nothing even then, she put her snout on the book, her last resort it to take it in her mouth and start chewing. She doesnt go directly to chewing.. she gives me enough chances to start paying attention to her. Learnt it all by herself.

[@TheKim369]

My border collie understood 250 words or phrases when she was 11. I know it sounds like BS, but it's true. She's had "lessons" for words like come and sit and lie down and get down and be quiet and NO and rollover, but she'd learned the rest, mostly on her own. She knew the names of everyone in our household, she knew the names of each of her toys - ball was not rubber chicken, she knew the names of activities and understood to go to one door for ride in the car and another for go for a walk. She was the best dog I ever had and decades later I still miss her. But to anyone who wants one, please consider, they are herding dogs, they need to be kept busy most of the time. They are great for good, non chaotic, families who understand the dogs particular needs, not just for exercise, but also for intellectual stimulation and emotional compassion and connection. They are not a dog for single people who are unwilling to spend hours a day throwing a frisbee, or worse, must leave them home alone.

[@OrualMuse]

For me, dogs are part of the family. The more time they spent with us, the more we interact and even talk to them, the more they seems to understand and behaves better and better. They recognize his/her place in the pack, they think, they feel and yes they love their familly.

[@bethanybouley6679]

everyone used to ask me how i trained my first dog Muttlee, and i would always say " i dont tell him what to do, i ask him like an equal" we never even needed words, almost all of my communications with him was body language. this woman is saying what ive been thinking ever since i had first lived with a dog, she is my newest hero.

[@jonathanjones635]

Really? Have you ever seen your dog proud because it can do something no other dog can? Or when they run the agility event field with chest puffed out and eyes of firey joy. Have you ever seen the light in a dog you trained’s eyes after they pulled someone from a burning building building, or as they stood by you confidently as the bullets were flying? As someone who has worked with companion dogs, military and rescue dogs and many things in between I can confidently say, when you don’t train your dog you are barely scratching the surface of what your relationship could be. Working like GSDs and Borders want to work and be trained and companion dogs like Frenchies want to snuggle with everyone. Kim is silly and trying to put human reaction and expectation in dogs when dogs are dogs and have been for thousands of years. They were the first thing EVER to be domesticated, including plants. And they were crafted by man for man before recorded history.

[@glenj.taylor2938]

@@jonathanjones635 Finally, someone in these comments who actually "gets it." I 100% agree with what you wrote and respect your education and experience.

[@juliapilgrim6074]

@@jonathanjones635 I am not sure that what you say is completely at odds with Kim's viewpoint. One can be firm with a dog when teaching them but not terse or over dominating. I especially don't see that she is claiming that dogs are humans. I think she's explicit that they aren't.

[@lisaspikes4291]

I always let a new dog approach me. It’s better that way. And we always seem to get along. Dogs are different from humans, but we complement each other. With the dogs I’ve had, I was always able to bond well with them, and because of that trust, we are able to communicate easily. I’m aware of my dog’s reactions, and he’s aware of mine. We are best friends. Not “master” and “pet.” And I’ve always gotten my dogs from the pound. They are considered mutts. But I think mutts are the best!

[@patriciabowden1467]

Lisa Spikes I've always adopted you Lisa...well I've had two dogs & 3 cats from the pound and all of them have been great additions to family who had long healthy lives. Mutts are most definitely where it's at! I don't understand why purebreeding is even still a thing frankly except to satisfy the snobs...?

[@mrspeigel3593]

@@fallingalice2601 the eugenisist ideas of the AKC and human greed have done massive amounts of damage to dogs. The AKC is the canine Bureau of Racial purity really.

[@mrspeigel3593]

Yeah, I think of my dogs as trusty sidekicks not minions

[@jenk6895]

“Purebreds” are a myth. We simply breed them to look a certain way then call it “better”. It’s absolutely ridiculous.

[@calexj903]

When my dog was a puppy, what training was necessary was easily accomplished with positive reinforcement and consistency. My dog has become what Ms. Brophey suggested: The dog who wants to meet everybody and who believes everyone who comes to the house is there to see/play with him. I don't mind. What has amazed me is what we (he and I) have learned since the formal training ended. There is so much more he knows now, and so much more he and I communicate to each other without even trying. That my dog knows the names of the rooms in my house, that telling him where I'm going is the difference between him being asleep on a chair or waiting anxiously by the door when I return, that I can simply say "show me" when he obviously has something in mind, and he will find something to take me to, even if it wasn't what he originally had in mind -- all of this blows me away. I never feel I'm good enough for him, but I love him. And he has learned to trust me, even if he shows me at first that he would rather not...take the bath, get the allergy shot, have me put gooky stuff in his ear. And I have no desire, reason or would ever force anything on him. In fact, I make promises to him in words that he may or may not understand, and I always keep them. I tell him I love him every day. I say nite nite to him every night. I want to feel like he knows he can count on me; that he is safe here. I've learned so much from him, and his willingness -- his wanting -- to work and play and just be with me feels like an honor every day.

[@soplim8632]

My dog’s feelings mean everything to me and I never forget them

[@laughingpaws]

BRILLIANT! I've been preaching this for years and am SO glad to hear it come from someone else. We do not own other beings, we share our lives with them, as equals. Thank you for this talk!

[@garypederson2767]

I hired a dog trainer for just one session. My very sensitive dog was a mess after she left our house. Gentle training has worked very well for my dog. Kim said "breed matters" and that is SO true. Don't get a herding dog if you live on a tiny inner city lot! I have also learned by experience that rescue dogs are more appreciative - they know they were rescued.

[@infamyinfamy]

I dunno, I cracked up laughing the other week, watching someone walking their American Foxhound through our urban neighborhood. The owner was really embarrassed by him howling/barking at everything. The owner didn't understand the dog was just doing his job...look I've found a car, look I've found a human, look I've found a hedge. Top entertainment.

[@jonathanjones635]

What? Gary, you can definitely get a herding dog in live in the inner city, it is TIME not space that is important. I live in a studio apartment with a border collie and she is very happy and gets lots of regular exercise and skills training (I am a professional dog trainer). She is just as happy as my aussies were on 10,000 acres so like, your comment is wrong, but said with good intent. Most people who live in the inner city don’t have the time to spend with a high energy breed

[@garypederson2767]

@@jonathanjones635 I agree with you. However, most people that I know who have such breeds don't properly exercise them. As a trainer you understand the dogs needs and have met the dogs needs. I'm not saying ALL owners of herding breeds don't exercise them appropriately although many I am aware of do not.

[@pamdiamond7555]

@@garypederson2767 my

[@Here4TheHeckOfIt]

I love this. You paid attention to your dog and intuited that your dog is sensitive. Some people just want a dog that just obeys and have no real interest in how they actually experience their lives.

[@glad2bnlv]

We need to re-examine our relationship with animals in general. The dog crisis, the 3.5 million unwanted dogs annually, is a prime example and those are the animals we refer to as our "fur babies". As a species, we can do much better.

[@kristincaldwell6345]

Deborah Baird a

[@launabanauna8958]

Deborah Baird There’s nothing wrong with calling them “fur babies.” Just a term of endearment. The woman in the video is a loon.

[@gypsysoul9437]

Deborah Baird I agree with your statement and would like to add that as long as people are profiting by exploiting animals, they will continue to deny them of dignity and empathy thereby allowing animals to be misunderstood, dumped, abused and murdered all because humans have a superiority complex.

[@lornocford6482]

@@gypsysoul9437 I agree with you and Deborah Baird. It's sad that there are so many people who are so arrogant that they think they know how to treat an animal without the first bit of actual training themselves. It doesn't surprise me though. People treat their children as though they own them and don't need to find out how to have a respectful relationship with them.

[@Asmr_kungfu]

I hate the tern “fur baby’s”

[@eledhwenmare2403]

A good video. I work with livestock guardian dogs as partners. They help me earn a living. They go into danger every day to protect their flocks. I love them but I remember their needs and wants. I use dogs from a rescue that rehomes flock guardians abandoned by people who don’t understand the guardian’s needs or who sell a flock and shrug and walk away. Keep up your good work.

[@taticaramico]

Omg.... best ted talk ever! THANK YOU! My dogs are my babies, they are part of me and are my family. They are not pets. We talk (I know what they want and need by looking into their eyes). They have different personalities and different needs. I cater to each of them the best I can, because I own my life to them! Dogs are angels that are in our lives to make us understand love and compassion.

[@bethhelminiak5063]

Love! My dogs and cats aren't "pets," they are my babies. I spend a lot of time making sure that they are happy, and still giving them tasks and expectations

[@rawhideleather]

Unfortunately between 3 and 4 million dogs are euthanized here in the U.S. every year. Truly shameful and doesn't say much for us humans.

[@quantumcrash7266]

My dog gave me so many unbelievable gifts. Taught me how to be a better human. He was my child, teacher, and best friend. We humans are discovering the richness and depth of our relationship with animals.....and we're making progress (just not as fast as I'd like!).

[@DW-lr7vk]

My family treat our dogs as a part of the family... ALWAYS!

[@blackdogslivesmatter1568]

My dogs trained my really well. All they have to do is give me a subtle command and I react.

[@anaturals4335]

Probably all of us feel well-trained :). I know I do :)

[@my2centz545]

Right who's the real boss 🤔😂

[@JupiterJennyArts]

As a Force Free Modern dog trainer, I can tell you this battle is real. We just educate one owner at a time. Who would of predicted kindness would be such a radical concept in the dog training world? As a dog owner you are your dogs protector and advocate. Harsh tools and methods are completely unnecessary in training ANY dog.

[@yarnpower]

jenn cunningham exactly, for the average dog without serious behavioral issues, harsh methods are totally unnatural. People should know their breed, what characteristics are prevalent BEFORE buying or adopting and then find a way to let them use those urges. For instance, Huskies need to run miles every day. The average person is not going to provide that amount of exercise. So they are not a good choice for non runners.

[@DouglasJRoss]

Who are these harsh trainers that people claim exist. It blows my mind to hear these claims, yet in 40 years of training dogs, I have never once in the US or in Europe seen any certified trainers either use or teach harsh methods. I have seen students meaning new owners muck it up a bit and be corrected in not hurting or forcing their animals. I have seen chuckleheads who claim to be trainers that don't know the first thing about training, but someone who is certified. Not once.

[@glenj.taylor2938]

@@DouglasJRoss When you say "certified," what certification are you referring to? I ask because here in the United States, I do not know of any Nationally, or Internationally recognized "certification." Also, about 15 years ago I signed our family up for group dog training classes that was offered through our city. The "trainer" was 100% harsh on the dogs and after the first class I refused to let her handle our puppy. To no surprise, I shared my (which was noted as the entire class' experience) with the city officials and that was the only time she taught in our city that I know of.

[@KJ-ut4rw]

@@DouglasJRoss Caesar Milan, Matt Beisner etc.

[@bEnderOfWorlds]

@@DouglasJRoss No word on what "Certification" you obtained here in the US? As far as I know there isn't a certification endorsed by the AVMA or the AVSAB. It has been a year, have you figured out what that certification was called yet?

[@debbiehahn5622]

An amazing presentation. Finally, we are talking about dogs in the light we should have all along! Thank you!!!

[@33roses]

Word

[@bjpetersen8540]

I highly recommend Kim’s book “Meet Your Dog”, which offers detailed explainations of each of the LEGS, as well as descriptions of the dog types that have developed through selective breeding for particular work, and what each is likely to need for fulfillment and a successful relationship with their human. Two thumbs up!

[@my2centz545]

I went thru the same exact thing, and then attached myself to my dogs I treat them as they are my best friends they taught me unconditional love ... I am devoted to my pets regardless I refuse to give them up .. even if I have to be poor homeless or anything else they come first . ..

[@doricetimko332]

Same. ❤️❤️❤️

[@tmaxim2651]

I have a shy dog and I know exactly what you’re talking about. He’s always been timid, even with positive training, socialisation and reinforcement. People always go for the head and try to pet him even after I tell them that he’s shy...

[@jeniwatkins3297]

Same here. People just do not understand boundaries or reading a dog. When people ask to pet my boy, i always thank them for asking first and then tell them it's up to him. If he wants to let them pet him, he will go to them. Just hold out your hand and let him decide. It's a toss up if he will or not. Lol

[@Asmr_kungfu]

That’s a nono

[@downundanow5569]

@@jeniwatkins3297 Ha ha, I have fun with my working line GSD. I tell her to sit and she just looks at people with no expression whatsoever so she doesn't give them a clue what she's thinking. I tell them it's up to them if they want to pat her (I know she does want them to). People walking past either grin or look on in horror, waiting for what comes next. Nobody gets over friendly with her, I wouldn't either if I didn't know her, they just tickle her head, rub her ears and thank us.

[@MickeyNicolet]

The best and most impactful TED talk I have seen...thank you for the insight and change in perspective. It has completely shifted how I look at my best friend, Taki, who I rescued 2 years ago (as well as the behaviors both he and I exhibit to other humans and dogs, respectively, while out in public). I will share this with all the dog people I know as it’s a bit of a shock to realize that although I consider myself a devout dog lover, I’ve been perpetuating some of the most painful things dogs regularly endure in this country. But I mean a shock in a good way, as it will certainly incite change. Thank you Kim!!!!

[@sfrwriter]

Thank you for this TEDtalk. This is such a big problem. I have told people countless times to respect my dog's boundaries, but people just don't get it. I'm afraid it will never change.

[@heatherjane910]

I have a Bernese Mountain Dog. This breed in particular is super sensitive to the type of training it receives. They’re also known to be a shy breed if not socialized early and often. As you described, she does not like people approaching her enthusiastically unless she knows them. The mistake we made was thinking our older Berner was handling the socializing. Since we lost the older one, our current one became fearful of strangers. We’re working on it. Her bark is big and scary. However, any type of too firm or aggressive correction makes her cower. She wants to please. Thankfully, she’s improving and it’s all because of positive reinforcement, and being able to read her emotions.

[@bunille]

She's saying that you should treat dogs as family, not as ownership or something to toy around with.

[@sadiecoleman3477]

Why would you do both? Just treat animals with the same respect and kindness you would treat a person with. Their species does not determine the validity and value of their life. All beings are deserving of love, kindness, and respect. You do not “own” animals, they are your companions, your friends, your helpers, they are not things or toys, they are living beings and if you take up the responsibility of taking care of them you should take care of them to the best of your ability.

[@sadiecoleman3477]

Just treat them as family, there is no reason to ever treat them like things

[@bunille]

@@rdm3373 Of course you shouldn't take them unnecessarily on holidays and to theme parks lol, but by not toying around with them, I mean that by treating them as this play thing and vanity thing, you are not treating a dog like a dog, but some "cute cuddly animal" and it may as well be a plush at that point. They need their basic needs met, but also their attention levels shouldn't be too much or too little for the dog; the problem with many people is that they pick breeds by what they find cute, not by temperament or a mixture of both, and realise they're too hyperactive/lazy/etc. and then complain about the dog for doing something they naturally do/not doing something they shouldn't be doing. If someone doesn't like the way their dog behaves, then maybe with the hundreds of selections they could've picked from, they should've chosen wiser. You can technically "toy" with a hyperactive dog or a puppy as long as it's not engulfing them and you know to set boundaries as they grow up and become more lax, but for any other dog, "toying" is not playing, it's esentially treating them like a human baby. And by ownership, I mean treating your dog like it's a trophy and being vocal about it. Nobody likes a parent who has to tell everyone around them why their kid is "so amazing at sport", for example. Once and never again if it is such an achievement, and only with close friends? But I wouldn't want anyone to keep on telling people. Even if studies end up proving that none of this affects a dog much, it's still setting a bad example for children.

[@bunille]

@@rdm3373 I was talking more in-depth about what I meant in my first comment.

[@shawnhambler]

Sad seeing my dog passing on but it’s good to see him going on without me. At least he will be in heaven with my dad

[@TanyaStingley]

This is how my puppy and I coexist, with respect, love and understanding! We don’t deserve Dogs

[@blackdogdancer]

I agree with this TED Talk.. and pretty much live with my dogs with this idea in mind. Fergus was a dog that really didn't want to meet new people. He liked children. He liked small dogs (he was a super large dog). And he loved his family. We stopped forcing this round peg - into a square hole. He was good to us - and we loved him. Looking back I am so glad I never forced him to be what he wasn't.

[@tarotheinu]

I treat my dog like my family. I don’t force anything on him. If he doesn’t like to be touched or doesn’t want to do something it’s fine. Its the same for us humans. Some people would say he is spoiled but I just let him be part of almost everything and I share a loooot with him. And today he is the sweetest dog ever. No behavioral issues. He respects me, I respect him.

[@herojig]

A rather chilling Ted talk. I live in Nepal, where the definition of pet is different, and street / community dogs behave more as they have for thousands of years in partnership with humans. Studying these "non-pet" dogs gives you a better picture of what a dog is, and apparently does not release as much Oxytocin :) But after rescuing one of these beasts, you realize that what Kim says is true; our idea of what "dog"is - is not what they are.

[@byongdownunder]

Really? Cmon. You don't think there's a difference between domesticated dogs and dogs that wild and roam around in packs? And I'm not quite getting your point? So you saying we should raise our dogs more like the way wild dogs act? I hope your not consulting and training people about dogs. Lol!

[@Xpand2infinity]

@@byongdownunder You seem to have misunderstood the point of what "Pheonix" is saying. As I understand it, in Nepal and other countries where dogs are allowed to roam freely, they are mostly wild and unchanged from how they would have related with humans for thousands of years. If you study their behaviour without them being "pets" you get a much better sense of their natural way that they behave, just as dogs and there is less romanticising about "what a cute puppy" . When you decide that you are going to "rescue" one of these animals, you see that they are not just a blank canvas - that both parties need to bend to make this relationship work. Sometimes in India etc - there is a family dog that gets a collar and extra attention but they still roam the streets with other dogs- they can have more autonomy.

[@byongdownunder]

@@Xpand2infinity I can understand you to a point but I have to say I mostly disagree. Sorry mate. I've had 3 rescue dogs and fostered many more and I just think that with all the selective breeding that we've done for all these years, we've bred out a lot of those "wild dog" characteristics. With lots of love and patience, these "wild" dogs have become great "pets" and companions. Or they can become great family dogs. Every dog has their own unique character but I believe even the most aggressive dogs can be rehabilitated to become great "pets". Sorry if I've still misunderstood you.

[@byongdownunder]

Maybe the dogs in Nepal are completely different, I don't know. Maybe that's where the difference lies? But then again there are many people who have little knowledge or understanding of dogs. Experience does make a huge difference and I guess it is hard to get that understanding without that experience. It's not like they teach dog behaviour at school. And even if you have a dog, the experiences gained from a mild mannered lap dog is completely different to that of an aggressive dog with no exposure to people. Geez. Why does everything always come down to education and knowledge? Lol!

[@jessiv841]

@@byongdownunder I don't know about Nepal but I do know that in Hawaii, in the rural neighborhood I live in, there are many dogs that roam free. They go, with or without their owners, to various houses in the neighborhood constantly. They have social relationships with each other and have established their own pecking order amongst the long term residents. Many of these dogs are even blood relatives. When puppies result from this fraternization they tend to remain either with the mother or with someone else in the neighborhood. These dogs are also never 'lost'. They know where they live and they know where their friends (or their owner's friends) live and sometimes they travel miles to track their owners or a wild boar. And most of them were not necessarily 'trained' to do these things. The residents of a few streets where I live consider their dogs to be all part of a collective dog pack. This community of dogs also brings the people together when it comes to caring for the health of each others' dogs. Many people contribute to vaccinations for the neighborhood dog pack, with spaying and neutering, and people can more easily watch each others' dogs when they already have a relationship with them. It's not just about how "wild dogs" interact with humans but how they interact with each other. When dogs are allowed to roam freely you can observe both how a dog will interact with humans and how a dog will interact with other dogs when it is under no human restraint. At least the humans and dogs that it is unfamiliar with. If you don't think it's possible for dogs these days to behave like a "wild dog" I guess it depends on your definition of what a wild dog does. Dogs are still capable of hunting without being trained by a human to do it. They are still capable of being very aggressive towards humans and other animals. They are still capable of forming relationships with other dogs. They can still have puppies and raise them. Some still seek to avoid human contact. There are enough stray dogs to say that they are capable of feeding themselves in almost any situation even if that means taking advantage of food that humans throw away or leave for them. If "wild" simply means they are not tamed then there have to be some out there. Just like feral cats. It seems like it doesn't really matter to us what any dog might want... we are going to "rescue" it anyway. And those who do not behave in the manner we deem proper after being "rescued" they are either given to someone else or euthanized. If there are no wild dogs in this country it is only because we won't allow it. Think of all the other versions of domesticated animals that we allow to be wild. Animals that were, like dogs, bred to be different than their wild ancestors. There are wild examples of those animals all over the island I live on. Pigs, cows, chickens, geese, pheasants, pigeons, rabbits, parrots, parakeets, lovebirds. Multiple shipments of birds going to pet shops ended up getting damaged and within moments all of those "pet" birds became "wild" birds and have had a thriving colony in Kailua-Kona for over a decade. I can give you a very interesting example of an animal that did seem to have all of the "wild" bred out of it. A friend of mine raises chickens and he got a bird from a factory supplier. This hen could lay eggs (huge eggs) but she literally had no idea how to deal with them (sit on them until they hatched). She didn't know how to scratch the ground to find her own food (or really how to eat off the ground at all) so she couldn't teach her chicks how. She didn't know how to keep them warm and dry. After losing the chicks on his first try he ended up catching a wild hen and switching out the small eggs she laid for the large ones the domesticated hen laid. This wild chicken not only hatched the eggs but then went on to raise those chicks and those chicks went on to lead successful "free-range" lives. The domesticated breed of chicken is huge compared to the rest, but that is literally the only genetic difference. I believe the break in the chain between "wild" and "tame" is when we stop one generation from teaching the next how to survive independently of humans. It isn't that we bred all the "wild" out of dogs but that we typically don't train them to survive without us. We also don't teach them to interact with other dogs the way that dogs actually interact. The only thing our breeding programs accomplished was to give us a chance at a consistent temperament for the price of guaranteed health problems. Which also served to make them more dependent on us.

[@karentriviski8915]

My doggo was attacking me, and instead of throwing him away, I did what she's talking about. I looked at why my pup was attacking and how my behavior affected this. Turns out he likes being in control, gets nervous and scared when he's not, plus a few other things, the point is I worked with it. He still gets scared and still has issues, but I work within his comfort level to help him control his attacking. He doesn't attack anymore and instead of me being a trigger I'm now his comfort to get himself under control. So she knows what she's talking about.

[@olderendirt]

My westie mix just passed away in my arms a few nights ago at almost 13 years old from heart failure. He was such a dear to us, but he wasn't much of a people dog which we understood. We got him at around 5 years old and at one point he tried to nip me. We found out years later he'd had a broken rib we knew nothing about, but I think that touching that area was the cause. He would grumble at other people in their own yards and look to us if their dog was outside. He'd been attacked while leashed by a stray much larger. I think we both had ptsd from it. This makes so much sense as to why his behavior was the way he was which was a love of our lives. He was a smart, amazing little dog. Thank you for this talk and for what you do.

[@nyteshayde1197]

This is called anthropomorphism. I don't train them as "pets", I train them for their own safety and I do so with kindness.

[@luv2charlie]

Erin Maurer love it!

[@RenegadeTimes]

Erin 100% correct. You think she grasps this ...

[@johnca6048]

spot on. I'm curious if this speaker even considered this. Her traumatic experience is the dogs.

[@mattguzda853]

This speech is weak and her perspective as well. Dogs came from wolves under the direct care of humans. We made them what they are and her stranger scenario apeals to how people would feel about the encounter not dogs. And thats her whole problem. Cheers

[@launabanauna8958]

Erin Maurer I concur, the woman in the video is a loon.

[@BellaMarsilioRN]

Awesome TED Talk Kim, I’ve been owned by dogs all of my life (63 years) and you’ve reinforced much of my views of dogs. Thanks!

[@keithbell9348]

This is why her services are so valuable. Many humans need to be trained.

[@caligal3699]

Wow. I'm sorry she had such a rough start. However, treating a dog like a dog/pet IS respecting them and their boundaries. It is NOT approaching them at random. I had taken in an abused dog and got him as healthy as possible, and he had such as sweet face, mostly German shepherd, and some lady saw his sweetness and approached him and started petting him and got right in his face. He bit her in the face before I could stop her. She treated him like a human and not like a dog. Had she treated him and respected him as a dog/pet, he would have welcomed her adoration. Anyway this was very difficult to listen to. I hear her pain through her words about the dogs. I wish her the best. While I believe her intention is supreme, she is just not 100% correct.

[@aslmad1]

You are correct and kind as well. Well said

[@rowanwax]

If some random person walked up to me and started touching me or hugging me, I’d freak out, too. My experience says humans treat pets like how that lady treated your dog. Different perspective, same desire to interact that way with animals. ☺️

[@Bug-cp6lz]

No, that's the problem. That lady treated your dog like an object, like it was something that she could touch whenever she wanted to without permission. If she had walked up to a child on a street and started touching that and getting in their face, the parents would probably have gotten upset and possibly violent, or the cops could've been called. It's very scary when someone walks up to your child or to you without your consent. Your body is yours and yours only, some random person on the street isn't going to walk up to you and ask to touch you, but if they do, you have the option to walk away and get help. Dogs don't have that, and most people don't even ask to pet your animals before they just start touching. so what you said about that lady not treating your dog like a dog is true, she treated him like he was an inanimate object. Dogs are not pets, they are companions. (Also I'm not saying to not pet dogs, but if a dog does not want to be petted, don't do it. Respect their boundaries.)

[@denaliguidesummit7029]

Holy Conniptions, I can feel the helplessness. Thank you for your presentation. As a human and member of the Animal Kingdom, it is good sense to treat all others as we would wish to be treated.

[@Zhahn-Pam]

I am so grateful to hear this, as this is exactly how I feel. it is also my story.

[@Tracy-xe9zu]

I watched this years ago and it's greatly changed how I interact with new dogs; offering them my hand to smell when first meeting them, and accepting if they don't want to say hello to me. It's also changed how I let people treat my dogs; when they ask to pet my older dog in particular, I tell them that he's shy and he will decide if he wants to say hello; during those times he decides he doesn't, most people have been very understanding when I explain that I'm not going to force him if he's not feeling sociable.

[@abigailmarkowitz1308]

My dog doesn't like strangers touching him and even snipped at the groomer when he didn't want to be touched even though he has never bit anyone ever. People always assume something is wrong with him, but really he just wants to get to know people before he lets them touch and cuddle him, which I can 100% understand and relate to.

[@KarenmitchellANI]

Ive always respected any animal I meet or have cared for. I allow them to come to me, on their terms, not I to them. I allow them to jump up onto my knee, on their terms, I don't just pick them up.

[@jollyroger2374]

This is a really good message and something that needs to be heard by every dog owner,

[@andyp91]

I don't spend a minute 'training' the dogs I've had over the years. All the behavior I exhibit to them is calm and respect, and all that I need them to learn is done organically over time, with a mix of gestures, affection, words, claps, little noises with my tongue. I don't give a darn about them doing tricks. Just want them to be safe, have fun and be happy. Gosh I love her. I feel blessed to have found her.

[@prash2411]

Marketing will kill the world- energy drinks and neutering the dogs. Thanks for speaking out for our lovely brother and sons who can't talk ❤️ but have a bigger heart than corrupt humans

[@avadea5296]

brilliant. straight from the heart. cuts deep. and yet does give hope.

[@jmorgansaifer5158]

Thank you for sharing your heroic story. As a professional Animal Communicator, I absolutely agree with your points. Thank you for speaking on behalf of dogs ❤🙏🐾

[@josephlebard4585]

With this I am assured that my dog is my best friend whom walks talks an eats an sleeps by my side I've never trained her to sit lay down or beg yet she listens to my every word an walks beside me an I pray this will continue in heaven GOD bless all.

[@daleenalberts5829]

This is awesome. I will watch this video over and over. You are just what the dog world and other "pets" need. Thank you so much.

[@lalaland962]

Excellent talk! I love my dogs, and I treat them like the companions and friends they are.

[@kathielittlefield1795]

Thank you for sharing your story and your wisdom. I have the same idea and feelings about everything you shared!!! I’m sharing your message with everyone I know and pray that humans begin to learn more about dogs and their feelings and give them more respect. I wish I could meet you and learn more from you. Sincerely Kathie ( a major dog lover, I respect & trust the dogs feelings!

[@kelseymathias3881]

Bless you Kim Brophey! 🧡

[@dianadavis5002]

My dogs are well behaved, (seven of them) because they feel secure and loved by me. Everyone who meets them is amazed that they listen when I tell them something. I've never or will ever hurt them.

[@nowayjose3592]

Animal shelters are over run with dogs because people don’t put in the time to train their pets. So, they bite, are not housebroken, unsocialized, bark,...ect., becoming problems and once the puppy cuteness is gone and the owner tires of feeding the pet in the backyard, they are taken to the nearest shelter or set loose on the streets. Sorry, but while I agree harsh training techniques are not needed to train an animal I do not see where not training your pet is at all helpful as it does nothing to keep your pet safe nor give it any chance of having a loving home.

[@HickW]

I don't think the problem here is lack of training but lack of owners' interest in their dogs! E.g., do they walk their dogs 3-4 times a day, like you should? How far?

[@LL-vj5yp]

NoWay Jose 👏👏👏👏❤️

[@nicetomeetme5150]

I agree with you. I love all 5 of my dogs but a leash keeps them from being ran over etc. I want my dogs to live long. Training is neccesary

[@radamson1]

The dog she is describing, getting petted has never been socialized which in the animal world can be deadly if they get away from you.

[@kristinjayne6720]

She isn’t suggesting no training, rather looking at our own behavior while training and teaching.

[@daniellehayes8649]

Finally dog owners waking up to this awful behavior. So happy to hear it.

[@scottcupp8129]

She is SPOT on in every applicable sense.

[@dibrentley7915]

I think what she is saying is your pet is not "a Pet" but a member of the family and should be treated with respect. You really dont need to do horrible things with leads to make your dog walk etc. When you treat your dog well he will love you so much he will walk just fine on that lead. But just like children they need to be guided and have boundries set. I have a huge problem when I hear of people getting dogs for a christmas or birthday present for a child and the parents think this is going to teach them responsibility etc. as if that dog belongs to that one child and not a member of the WHOLE family. I also have a problem with people saying you should be able to take food off your dog without it being snarly. Everyone teach your children not to go near a dog when its eating, thats respect.

[@jkreps18]

It breaks my heart when a dog is beatin or blamed for a dog biting a kid cause the dog was eating, both of our 4 legged children are not food aggressive with me and the wife, but I will never allow my son's to mess with em when eating, for i know my 4 year old will get nipped for he is young the same height as them an no matter how good you train a dog little kids are right at that wrong height and come off threating and want to hug their kneck and kiss their face when eating, and even though I can sit in their face and have my hand in their food bowl while eating I bet id still get bit if I was to kiss their face or hug their kneck if they are eating for it's their nature but adults don't ever wanna blame themselves even though most of furry family member that bite a kids in the homes they live in is not the dogs fault

[@xyzsame4081]

The _leader of the pack gets the food first._ For your own safety and that of the dog _YOU confidently assume the position of alpha dog._ (they are not humans and you do not "humiliate" them if you relegate them to a lower place in the family hierarchy, it is the only way they can safely live with humans. Especially ! if the dog is large, strong, from a breed known to be aggressive or if the dog has the potential to do harm when they bite. Tiny dogs that misbehave are a nuisance, a pitbull or German shepherd that misbehaves (from the point of view of humans) is a potential danger. A dog is NOT supposed to bite, even when a child or clumsy person approaches them. They can start growl (if they are the kind of intimidating dog), they can hold their distance, they can go away. The dog owner is responsible for security, that's his job (it comes with being the alpha), so the dog does not have to bark (a lot) or get aggressive. And never ! is a dog allowed to bite a child. If they annoy him, he can go out of the way. If they would mess with the food bowl it is the job of the dog owner (alpha) to set things right and to tell off the kids to let the dog alone. If the dog thinks he is the alpha - well of course then he will defend the food bowl. Else that is the job of the human alpha - which will solve that with human strategies. - That may include that the dog has to "endure" that someone touched his food (if the owner does not notice and protect the dog from human misbehavior). But having the position of alpah clarified like that, brings with it that the dog will NOT be the one to defend the food, at least not with biting.

[@thechronic555]

Ive been pondering this idea for several years since a certain level of maturity ive reached..one day, this idea of having pets, buying and selling animals will be looked at as a form of slavery. The dogs i inherited were bought and owned by my mother but they are my family, not my property.

[@MaryJaneHancock]

Oh I so agee!! Thank you for posting. Wonderful perspective.

[@user-lz6dm5lk9y]

Wow....thank you so much on behalf of dogs and all animals. Yo wpoke what I always have known. May your message reach every human being, and may each one see the light.

[@cybergrail]

We have two dogs with very distinct personalities. They clearly have their own way they enjoy doing things, with their individual wants and desires.

[@arikeeper9061]

Right on. Good speaker and great topic. The disconnect between ppl and their dogs is real; humans tend toward narcissism and are clueless as to how the animal feels. The comment section here sadly reflects that.

[@DF-te2vm]

If you want real enjoyment from having a dog.... try to understand them, like she says !

[@lindalowe337]

It is an honour to love my 12 year old dog. He’s taught me what love means.

[@monolithsound]

I love to watch, listen, and learn from my dogs. We currently have 5 dogs in the home. Our home, all of our home. They are continually talked to and we laugh and have fun together. I don't raise my voice to them unless their voices are raised and I just want to bring down the din. That's usually when they are about to drive our neighbors absolutely bonkers. Even then I'm loudly saying, come on now, let's get in the house! They fully understand although it can take a minute to get their attention. It's like any other game. Then as they run in the door we praise them for hearing us. We invite them to play with their toys and each other, and listen to their reply. Often they just want to relax, or hang out with us, and it's all welcome. Then it's back to normal. They are our friends and in a way, our kids. It's the same for our cats, there is little to no distinction aside from the behavioral models which both species show us through their coming to us in this amazing conversation. It really is a convergence of species, and in my view quite miraculous. And if there is indeed a Creator, as I tend to lean toward as so, I couldn't be more grateful for the lessons that my family and I have been given through these friends throughout our lifetimes.

[@louloubell6586]

I have a bordercollie x kelpie and he's just such a character. He's 8 months old and has just stopped wanting to go out at night. He was doing it just to have extra attention. Whilst I appreciate that I now don't lose 3 hours sleep every night when he wakes me up and I can't get back to sleep, I would never, ever lock my dog in a "crate" just to make my life easier. It is so wrong to me to lock a dog in a cage. Circuses had to stop having animals in cages because it was cruel, why is it ok to lock a dog up?

[@mikeg9b]

I spent most of this video wondering, "ok, so what are you trying to say?" And I'm still not sure. I think part of her message is that dogs should not be our slaves, and I agree with that. But dogs are descendants of wolves who chose to live with humans. So, dogs and humans are meant to be together. And dogs are pack animals that expect a dominant leader at the top of the hierarchy. And I think it's obvious that that role should fall on the human. After all, the human provides the food and shelter.

[@ruthlomax8669]

What do you mean by dominant? We all need to be more careful of the terminology we use. The word dominant has all sorts of connatations bringing up images of punishment and intimidation which of course is not necessary nor is what actually happens in nature. Its usually a female that leads by example. She would be a strong character for sure and would stand her ground if challenged but the rest of the time she would be a bundle of fun or a teacher to the pack. We need to align with that image. Wolves in nature rather than in false groups determined by humans eg in a Zoo, show great respect and affection for each other as a family group would. Dissenting behaviour is dealt with as little vioence as possible. And its often the female who dishes it out. But this is a digression from the talk. She has not said dont train, dont discipline, dont correct. She is merely asking us to ;look deeper into the way we do it and our expectations of our dogs. She is asking us to fully realise that as sentient beings in their own right, and as we are as different to them as they are to us, that we consider how they ,ay be feeling to the best of our ability to interpret their behaviour and feelings. They are not robots. They cannot just be programmed because it would be more conveient to us if they were.

[@mikeg9b]

@@ruthlomax8669 Thank you for your input. I edited my post to reflect that the pack leader is not necessarily male. And I agree with everything you said in your reply. This video (which I haven't seen in a month) is still weird. I don't have a dog (or other pet), but most of the dog owners that I know treat their dogs as members of their family. The last time I dog sat for someone, one of their dogs slept in the bed with me and the other slept on the floor next to the bed. I still cherish my memories of that week with those dogs. I don't doubt that there is inter-species confusion at times, but since dogs evolved to be with people, it's probably pretty minimal.

[@ruthlomax8669]

@@mikeg9b Thank you for that polite reply, Michael. I am so glad you get my perspective. I have also ammended my post to reflect the change in your post.

[@deespence8629]

I’ve always viewed my dogs as members of my family. I have a relationship with my dogs. I don’t see myself as their owner. We live together and I have never surrendered any of my dogs. They are a lot of work and every day is work. It never stops - we work together every day. My dogs all have similarities but differences as well. I love them so much and try my very best to make a good life for them. It angers me to see dogs treated like lawn ornaments!! If they come into your home- it’s for life… treat them with live snd respect!!!

[@VKangel11]

Thank you for this perspective

[@jennifer292011]

This lecture was wonderful. I truly enjoyed it. It's refreshing to see content on the internet that is worth watching about dogs. I myself have a great danes for many years and will probably owned them until the day I take my last breath. I also advocate for this breed because so many are given up under a year old just because the person failed or didn't do their research on the breed whatever the reason may be. It's never the dogs fault. It's our responsibility as dog owners to learn dog behavior and dog body language so that we can communicate and better understand our beloved pets. I usually do not leave comments but I've truly loved this lecture and wanted to thank you for putting it out there in the world. We need to stop treating not only dogs but all animals like property or some type of "thing ". They are living breathing animals that have basic needs and emotional needs as well. It's just ashame that some human beings take advantage of a dogs kindness and honestly by hurting them, neglecting them and not even meeting their basic needs. It's truly sad. You dont "train" a dog anymore than you "train" a baby or toddler....it's an ongoing relationship that develops and blossoms over time. When a dog trusts you and feels safe that's when the true love of an animal begins

[@lexbusterpals]

Thanks KIm, I found your talk very helpful. I recently had to return my dog to the local animal shelter because she was continually escaping from her yard. Because of my attachment to her it upset me greatly to have to part with her.Because I spend a lot of time working escaping was her way of expressing that she was unhappy to be left for long periods of time without any love or affection. I have learnt from this that when adopting a dog you have to seriously consider whether it will be suited to its living conditions and not merely selected because it looks cute and friendly.

[@ericajackson1451]

This is one of the best things I’ve ever watched. I want this woman to be my mentor!!!

[@user-wj2zv1vd8y]

What courage this woman has.

[@Germatti13489]

I have always had a talk with the dogs in my life so that we understand each other. My dog goes outside in the yard without a fence but stays in the yard and does not bark. The neighbor's dogs are let into a fence yard,bark continuously, and may even attack you because they have not been socialized. That is an irresponsible pet owner that puts their pet in danger because they're not told what to do by the pack leader. ❤️ From a former West Virginia Animal shelter director

[@jostadso]

Thank you for what you do, I spoil mine like crazy but I don't care what people think. All I care is that she knows she's loved.

[@juliusmaehlich3138]

jostadso. Good for you. I wish that everybody could be like you.

[@jeniwatkins3297]

Same here. My boy is well trained but, it was done with love and he is so spoiled rotten. My son makes fun of me for the dog. Lol

[@pallaviyadalam2764]

Get made fun of because of how much our dog is loved and spoiled. But we enjoy spoiling him as much as he loves getting all the special treatment. He's a rescue baby and deserves all the love in the world

[@ginettemelody1035]

Very well said. Big thanks. Blessings Melody

[@CynthiaSchoenbauer]

I LOVE THIS! Thank you soooo much. I didn't know it but I have been looking for this kind of a discussion standing up for dogs for a long time.

[@christinefoxtrainer]

I'm sharing your talk in a module with my students at my force-free dog training school. You are very brave. Thank you for inspiring and educating!

[@jonathanjones635]

Noooo this is the antithesis of force free dog training this training free dog training... also any proper force free school will tell you not to anthropomorpise or ascribe human reactions impulses or motivations to a non human subject. Dogs are DOGS, not only that but there are so many either blatantly false assumptions or sampled statistics in this video it’s ridiculous. Yes over 3 mil dogs are owner surrendered due to adolescent misbehavior but less than 1% of this dogs show any evidence of any training.

[@dalethorn2]

Ya gotta discipline a dog just like disciplining a human child. There's a line between parent and child that cannot be crossed, as there is between human and dog. As far as just reaching out and petting a strange dog, I've found that the best thing is to extend the hand and let the dog decide what's next.

[@jeniwatkins3297]

Yes. But it's i how you train them she is talking about. It must be done with kindness, compassion and love. Same goes for kids

[@meekroaringlion]

So what line is that exactly? I totally disagree with your, in my opinion, totally antiquated belief

[@foxfirelabradors5939]

@@meekroaringlion the line is what will get them hurt. You come when I call because I see that car coming at you or that donkey trying to stomp you. It was the same with my children. We had an agreement that many things could be discussed but if mom yelled, obey immediately so you don’t die. Then we can talk about it. I don’t throw around arbitrary rules. Things make sense to them most of the time and when they don’t, my dogs trust my judgement. I don’t give them reason not to trust.

[@Kiirkas]

Dogs don't require discipline because they do not cognitively understand human discipline. Where in the process of discipline is the dog being taught the desired behavior? How does punishing a dog improve the dog's choice the next time they're faced with a similar situation in the future? Discipline is unnecessary and antiquated. A strong bond, respect for boundaries, consent, conditioning, enrichment, and fear-free training are all humane, contemporary, and backed by science.

[@jesspeinado480]

Right on point. Everyone should see this and learn. Even those who love animals and believe they are treating them well and ethically.

[@wendybutler1681]

Respect. Mutual. Knowing they are beings with feelings who can love, fear and grieve. Knowing he would give his life for me. Knowing how happy I am to see him when I get home. How can you not respect?

[@mrkkg27]

Although I agree with many of your methods I do also think you are assigning human emotion, wants, fears and understanding to a non human with a different set of wants and desires which are more primal in nature. You may be expecting more than they are capable of providing. I love my dogs, they are all rescues. I tried to break up a fight between a dog I was fostering and one of my dogs, both dogs are about 75lbs. I spent the next year in and out of the hospital with infections recurring from the bites. Neither of the dogs would ever purposely bite me but when they are in fight mode they don't know. It was my fault for getting into the middle of it. Seven years later I still do adoptions and rescue just not every weekend as I did. I trust dogs far more than humans.

[@geertmostrey3340]

As a certified dog trainer, both for domestic dogs as well as dogs used professionally to detect drugs, explosives, etc... I do not completely agree with this video. Dogs have different behaviors and instincts than humans, and our only way to interact correctly with them is to understand these behaviors and instincts and communicate with them in a way they understand. I cannot help but feel that this video basically says : let your dog be the way he is ( oh and by the way if the bites you, that's OK... It's a dog after all). This kind of approach will not make neither your dog nor yourself happy!

[@nicoleinman5563]

Thank you!! I just tried to say this exact same thing but wasn't nearly as eloquent.

[@luv2charlie]

Well said!

[@Bochi42]

Tl;dr: yeah there is a ton left out, it's largely an emotional appeal to get some people to rethink their relationship with dogs & is in no way a training guide & may encourage people who overly anthropomorphize their dogs. But I still think ther is some real good value in this talk. I think she is making a really good point about the individual self or personalities of dogs. As a trainer you likely know how to read a dog in a way that many of the people I've met at the dog park clearly don't. Doesn't take long to read the owners either, eh? I do think her presentation goes overboard or is heavy handed on one side of the issue without enough balance and nuance, but I think it's incredibly valuable as one of many sources. I live in an Army town & we get the goo-goo gah-gah I want something to just love me & look cute & to buy things for & post pics & the I need a manly aggressive fit dog to reflect myself types of dog owners who frequently dump their pets when they change posts or don't live up to their expectations. -She's not going to reach the men but maybe she could reach some of the women. You are 100% right that dogs are not humans, she's not saying they are. Far to few people I meet understand what dogs are telling them because they don't pay attention to non-verbal communication & don't understand how dogs see the world with their noses & communicate & that their natural drives are different from ours. I really think she could improve her presentation by more teaching of specifics. But I get the feeling that this is a intro vid of sorts to get women in particular to rethink their relationship with dogs & then have questions about Well how then should I .. There is the obvious difference between what you do, train dogs to serve for utility & what she is talking about as dogs as pets, though I imagine you do some of both. I applaud her efforts to say hey dogs aren't just pets & if you don't want one as a family member but as a stuffed fur baby, then you have no idea what you are doing. I have a couple of rescue dogs now and I have to be aware of how they react and what I know of their pasts & pay close attention to things that make them anxious and work on getting them comfortable with those things by not pushing them too fast to be how I want them to be. But I see so many horrible dog owners that think if they just dominate & beat their dog for something maybe done hours ago that they'll have the perfect dog & trying to convince them otherwise is impossible. I learned from watching my Grampa handle cattle. He knew each one and their relationships to each other & handled them effortlessly but with great attention. ;) Tl;dr: yeah there is a ton left out, it's largely an emotional appeal to get some people to rethink their relationship with dogs & is in no way a training guide & may encourage people who overly anthropomorphize their dogs.

[@crotchet1586]

geert mostrey It was more nuanced than that; she was basically saying that every dog is an individual with its own personality and can't be put into a box because of or even regardless of a dogs breed or genetics or even simply because it's a dog. She's questioning and challenging the notion of what is meant by 'pet', 'ownership' and all the unconscious associations that we unknowingly have accepted and bought into unquestioningly; she is very strongly putting the onus and responsibility for the dog's behaviour back in the humans (owners) court and at the same time trying to raise understanding of just how unrealistic most dog owners expectations are.

[@cassafrasscubby460]

Funny, what I took away from this was to have more empathy for the expanse of a dog's mind and it's emotions. Instead of demanding it obey me.

[@puppycatw]

Thank you so much ...for helping our friends the dogs ... I hope this video reaches many ...

[@nuplanner5345]

Spot on. Small dogs are very commonly subjected to this behavior.