The 17 Ways Narcissists Sabotage Breakups

Escaping a relationship with a pathological narcissist is a deeply challenging and dangerous process. Narcissists often resort to calculated and extreme measures-manipulation, gaslighting, threats, and emotional abuse-to sabotage their partner’s escape. In this video, Ross Rosenberg, M.Ed., LCPC, unpacks the dynamics of these counter-reactions, offering valuable insights from his latest article. Learn about the predictable strategies narcissists employ to maintain control and how survivors of Self-Love Deficit Disorder™ (codependency) can prepare for and navigate these challenges. This is essential guidance for anyone seeking freedom from narcissistic abuse and a path to self-love recovery.
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ABOUT ROSS ROSENBERG
Ross Rosenberg, M.Ed., LCPC, CADC, is a psychotherapist, educator, expert witness, and celebrated author. He is also a global thought leader and clinical expert in codependency, trauma, pathological narcissism, narcissistic abuse, and addictions.
Ross's pioneering contributions to codependency have provided sweeping theoretical and practical updates and developed a treatment program that permanently resolves the issue. Ross has been featured on national TV and radio and is a regular radio and podcast guest.
In addition, he has traveled the world, giving his one-of-a-kind keynote presentations and educational workshops. His global impact is best illustrated by his KZbin channel, with 30 million views and 297,000 subscribers, and the sale of 190,000 Human Magnet Syndrome books published in 12 languages. In 2013, Ross created The Self-Love Recovery Institute, a hub for his personal development, workshops, professional training, retreats, other programs, and services.
Learn more at www.SelfLoveRecovery.com.
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[@RossRosenberg]

Our Holiday Sale is live! 🎁 Use code SLRI40 to save 40% on your entire order at SelfLoveRecovery.com!

[@danaloustel5974]

I left one week ago with the help of my mom. It took a lot of planning and educating myself through channels like this. A ton of prayer and tears. But God set me free.

[@kathleenosullivan8601]

God was your strength, but YOU set yourself free! Congratulations!

[@ABCD-si7px]

Finally contacted the attorney and am moving forward. After 30 years of asking including a few days ago he NOW offered to go to marriage counseling. I said no.

[@emilyward990]

Marriage counseling would have probably made it worse.

[@Nikkithedoll]

Yep he literally walked out of every counselor's office 5-15 minutes into session. Just move out and heal with a professional therapist who really knows NPD

[@elainebraindrain3174]

Its dangerous to openly leave an abusive narc, take precautions.

[@kimb4849]

In the 40 yrs I was married to a BPD, I truly saw all of those tactics. So debilitating and so hard to recover from.

[@floraflora2527]

Me too.I am destroyed.

[@MentalWellnessWithWaihiga]

These people have ruined my life. All my ex's. My mother. My father. My whole family. My previous sponsor, my mentors and friends, women that i have looked up to and looked to for love. You can imagine the betrayal. Im petrified of getting into an intimate relationship because of the type of monsters i attract. Lord have mercy on me. I need angels in my life for once

[@lilac624]

My childhood was very very traumatic because of those who raised me up

[@GitanaLuna23]

This is happening to me right this moment…I know what’s coming and I’m so scared. I see the signs, I’m dreading seeing it. A whole church parish that I thought were my saviors after tragedy after tragedy in my life…but…oh well, I must go on. I’ve enough strength for that.

[@kathleenosullivan8601]

Call them. Angels listen to your every word. Especially your Guardian Angel. Ask for a hedge & they will surround you. I don’t want to preach, but give it a try. Hugs & strength to you.

[@kathleenosullivan8601]

@@GitanaLuna23 You have MORE than enough strength!! You have Faith. Pray for that strength & ask your Angels for help. I’m just learning that my husband of 22 years has NPD. I haven’t even thought of divorce yet, much less made an Exit Plan. But I have The Holy Trinity & an entire Legion of Angels who are on my side. I also happen to have several really close friends who are also on my side, along with my family. I’ve been Blessed my entire life. I don’t look upon my marriage as a Magnetic whatever-connection. I believe God puts us where we need to be until it’s time to move on. Sometimes it seems painful, but it also strengthens us. Good luck to you.

[@GitanaLuna23]

@ thank you so much for your kind message. It means a lot and helps. God bless you!!

[@shawnburch9371]

This is scary how accurate this is😅.

[@deb2319]

When i realized who i was dealing with I started to hold back on giving and I noticed the narc creep away faster. For Example No Food In The Refrigerator they ran home to their mom for meals :) lol.... and I slowly started detaching in all other ways, they wanted money, rides and sex..and their actions were nil- lazy, excuses and emotionally empty. It was the biggest waste of time.

[@newbieme2731]

Everything you have described is accurate. Be safe these individuals are dangerous!!! Thanks for the information Ross

[@pija9505]

Like trying to escape a maze.. on fire

[@NikolAdair]

EXPLAINED IT PERFECTLY

[@SartorialisticSavage65]

Yayyy youre still here!!!

[@lalunar8]

I'm new to your channel. I gain a lot of knowledge from your content. Thank you. I have been watching different narcissistic videos for over a year now after researching some of the treatments I was receiving. Everything is so spot on. I also keep a daily journal and at the start of the "relationship" ( love bomb) I was journaling and writing poems about the intense magnetic connection we had. I feel like it was other worldly if that makes sense, I was so elated for many months I felt like it was meant to be. As the devaluation started after I began to speak up about my hurts, I also journaled that as well and I could clearly see the patterns. He is such a sadistic cunning covert type narcissist and I experienced everything you mentioned. The sabotage, triangulation and bait and switch. I had a very hard time leaving him. I still feel very vulnerable to his hoovering and feel bad for him although he hurt me beyond belief. Thank you for your content.

[@RossRosenberg]

Thank you for sharing and I am very happy to have helped in any way

[@suzanneadamson1306]

Bet u never heard this before: divorced the covert narcissist 30 yrs ago. Raised my sons alone b/c they were scared to go w/ their dad, even weekends. Son recently had a baby. My ex- wrote letters to the GF & my sons skewering my mothering! Vile letters which portray me as cuckoo.

[@kathleenosullivan8601]

Let time pass. My 1st hubby did the same thing. Apologized & played the “Oh, poor me! I had a mental illness. Your mother abused me!” Yada yada yada. Give it time. He’ll be found out or your son will miss you or something will trigger a reconciliation. I will keep you in my prayers. 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

[@QuintessentialKeygirl]

Keep moving forward with acts of kindness towards yourself. Your ex is a wounded child lashing out at you. Stand on your truth - you’re a good and loving mother. ❤

[@juliettecrossley4864]

They always portray you as 'the mad one'

[@elmaswanepoel1598]

SLD? I think it also goes for people that are not SLD. He is narcissistic and I'm experiencing this in full force now. Thank you for the insight. It helps a lot.

[@MYNAME_ABC]

Sound quality is bad due too high data compression.

[@locohealthcenter-ts6jv]

Wow ,3. Religious or spiritual distortions . This is the trap where someone takes a codependent for a Christian wedding and the other to the Attorney General's office for the registration of a second marriage. This is real manipulation. ❤🎉.

[@snyds03]

Where can I find the article you referenced in the beginning of the video?

[@gregorydoyle4804]

Is someone with borderline personality disorder considered a narcissist?

[@NikolAdair]

No but they may have learned narcissistic traits in survival mode from being raised by narcissistic parents.

[@anetabennett7146]

What is SLD?

[@gregorydoyle4804]

Self love deficiency disorder I think.

[@QuintessentialKeygirl]

Self love deficit

[@atinathenice1]

Thank you for interesting content, Pls remove chewing gum when talking, its disturbing.