The 3 Biggest Deathbed Regrets (And How To Avoid Them) - Hospice Nurse Julie

[@dillydalie11]

I have a terminal illness, I am not sad or depressed about it. !!! Per the stats. I might die today, next week, 39% live 36 months. I am blessed to KNOW that my end is near.

[@gen0cidejustice363]

May god have mercy on your soul...

[@blakejoseson3487]

May the higher entities be with you😢

[@valerykolev1286]

Meanwhile some ppl like me will end it themselves nevertheless sick or not. Asap I am not a functional human being and I am mainly dead weight - I am going out on my terms, when I want (unless I die before that - but death isn't scary. Life is.)

[@clairedodsworth5510]

Me too 😅​@@valerykolev1286

[@teteya.n]

@@valerykolev1286 😢😢😢please don’t say that😢❤️.

[@vivienclogger]

First the bowels and now death - the 2 subjects people avoid the most and which you approach with clarity and compassion. Well done, sir! ❤

[@EB.P]

I love hospice nurse julie! She definitely helped w my fear of death and how she explains things and showing honest videos ❤

[@rhyswaterman37]

Thank you for this video. I only fear death for my loved ones left behind.

[@CheekieCharlie]

I'm scared of not existing haha

[@valerykolev1286]

​@@CheekieCharlie Should be more concerned about vegans existing tbh ^.^

[@Tymbus]

Since Covid lockdown, I have found myself fact checking quotes commonly attributed to Mark Twain. Quote Investigator is especially useful in this regard. The quote you use is a paraphrase by Richard Dawkin and thought to be wrong. Here is what Twain, in all probability, actually said, "Annihilation has no terrors for me, because I have already tried it before I was born-a hundred million years-and I have suffered more in an hour, in this life". The source for this was Charles Neider, editor of “The Autobiography of Mark Twain”,

[@shelbyoffrink4424]

16:00 The guest talks about having doctors tell their patients with a terminal disease that maybe they should live their life. My wife had an intramedulary glioblastoma and she was in the medical field with coworkers and friends in dozens of countries. Her scans were sent worldwide wide. There are very few cases of this and whole cancer departments may only see one every few years. A single fantastic doctor in Europe (I unfortunately don’t recall the name) told us to just live her life while we can. All of the rest gave us treatment plans. My wife was young, just had our second baby, and fit so we decided to fight. It was debulked, radiation (which paralyzed her just below her diaphragm), and chemo. She lasted 16 months which is longer than average but so much was of her being sick, sedated, wheelchair bound, depressed, and sad. While I’m glad we had her for as long as we did I wonder how life would have been if we just would have let things progress and not fight.

[@Emilycatloverdoglover]

Thanks for sharing. Sorry for your loss. Maybe you're already aware, or people already told you: please try leaving that question behind. Any more time spent questioning your past decisions is just prolonging the misery from the sad event of life. I hope you have been trying your very best to move on and live life to the fullest for your loved ones including your wife. All the best to you.

[@donnavanderwalt7106]

I cannot tell you how much this has helped me. I am a nurse in South Africa. My mom got terminal cancer in the peak if covid. So I couldn't use hospice, I had to do all on my own. I was told no fluids etc and it worried me so. I have tortured myself since 2020, thinking I did it wrong. She only moaned on being turned, which was pain obviously. She took 1week from starting morphine patches to gone. So the suffering was short. I was used to hospital fluids etc. the hospice sister told me over the phone how i had to lwt her body prepare to die. Thank you thank you thank you. I really thought I had let my mom down. But she just slept looked at me and gave small smiles at times, even with mouth open as you said. We all need this, one never knows. Doing it alone at home during COVID was so hard. Thank you to you both. ❤

[@wheelie26]

I’m in my 50s now but when I was in my 30s with two young children I had a few very close calls with death which left me disabled and a fulltime wheelchair user. I regularly speak openly with my adult children about my wishes in all sorts of medical situations. I need them to know where I stand and not be afraid to carry out my wishes. Julie actually prompted me to begin this.

[@lethalogicax2474]

I've struggled with major depression through my whole life. At this point I've done all the therapy, am on the strongest anti-depressant that they got, and yet I still kinda don't really wanna be here anymore... Finding any outlet to be able to talk about it productively has been rare... I was recently given a new "option" by my doctors, they told me that MAID is now available for patients with chronic severe depression... I live a very different life now that I know that I have the option to sign a few forms and have an appointment to end my suffering, rather than having to pick up a blade and do something stupid myself...

[@l4m41987]

My grandpa died so nice, he knew he would die so he called his three daughters and his wife and they where sitting together in his Apartment and sad goodbye. He then closed his eyes, end.

[@tooflowery]

literally got goosebumps reading this

[@julianatorrez5146]

Thank you for this show. I am an ICU RN who used to be a hospice RN so I completely can relate to everything she is saying and I have to keep having discussions with other ICU RNs about feeling OK with allowing death to occur in some patients. I am also Mexican/ Native American and grew up celebrating dia de los muertos so, fortunately I have a different relationship with death than other ICU nurses around me.

[@nanetterolph2972]

I have suffered with being bi polar my whole life and wanted nothing more than to die at least a million times!! I even attempted suicide once but now that I am 64 my attitude has changed a lot! From the moment you take your first breath at birth you are dieing! I am no longer want to rush into death but realize it is a part of living! Now I just try to enjoy everything about every day!

[@silverghostcat1924]

I've always hated the phrase "We lost ___." What you misplaced them somewhere?

[@shelbyoffrink4424]

It probably came from the saying that since they are now gone we lost someone great. It’s more of a subtraction and not missing.

[@darkydoom]

Thank goodness we have Voluntary Assisted Dying in Western Australia now. So if you're terminal (6 months physical, 12 months neurological) and are sound of mind to make your own decisions, you can inact medically guided end of life. Had it in the home for my mother in law, had it for one of my patients in the hospital bed recently. Just, stop all the suffering when there is no getting better at the end stage

[@GugaVilaini]

"Live as if you were to die tomorrow, learn as if you were to live forever" - Mahatma Ghandi

[@HotRodder47]

Thank you for your dedication to making people better health wise that take tremendous dedication and passion I commend you for that.❤❤

[@paulwarner5674]

My husband refuses to talk about death. I on the other hand have no fear of death having worked as a hospital porter for 11 years. I hate to see CPR done on patients who really should be allowed to drift into death. CPR is traumatic to the patient and the staff and the success rate is only about 4%. Fancy dying whilst someone is trying to break your ribs and making you leave the bed with the defib burning your chest. I wouldn't allow them to use CPR on my 86 year old mother and she passed peacefully.

[@TRUTHisTRUTH70]

Most, if not all hospitals, ask if you have 'advance directives' when you are admitted (DNR, DNI, power of health care surrogate, living will). When I was nursing at the beside I would ask this question in a very matter-of-fact way, and further explain what these documents meant if someone was unaware.

[@Metroid250]

Nurse Julie plays a major part into my initiative to discuss end of life care, advanced directives, and DNR/DNI with my PCP. I have an appointment at Oct 1st and this will be the 1st thing to talk about after lab results. It's best to know what course of action will be taken in those events because I don't know if I'm gonna be alive in the next hour after I walk out of that office. Life is unpredictable, so it's best to keep these things in mind. The best part is that I can modify these as I grow (if I do). I don't need to rush and worry about it

[@AndyRides]

I wish I'd seen this before my wife died last year. Parts of this would have made a difference. They have helped me now as well.

[@CheekieCharlie]

Death is a huge phobia for me. The word even gets my heartrate up. I believe if people had been more open about death when I was a kid I'd be fair less afraid of it

[@silverghostcat1924]

The photos with the dead loved ones came about because photos in those days were very expensive, so they wanted to make the most of them. In some it's hard to tell the living from the dead. Because the way the photos were taken, the subjects had to sit still for quite a bit; hence the living were a bit out of focus because they moved some. There's a group somewhere in South America I believe, that lived with their dead. They washed them and dressed them and they slept in the same beds with them. I don't remember the specifics as it's been a while since I saw the story on a documentary.

[@l.a.8709]

Two of my favourites, together. Yay!

[@ktkt9982]

Mine too ❤

[@AstroBaby91]

Thanks for this!

[@sbelcher4651]

Two of my favorite YTers? Can not wait!!

[@warbler1984]

Youre one of my favourite KZbinrs...following your content intently

[@smacospasovski5123]

I'm afraid that it may hurt a lot when you die

[@katzrantz]

This is what I'm most scared of. I hate being in pain

[@shelbyoffrink4424]

My biggest fear is letting those I love down by dying.

[@smacospasovski5123]

@@katzrantz this video calmed me down,at old age 90 just sleeping and probably won't even know and feel anything

[@FYD523]

I have been lucky enough to have received some buddhist teaching. There is a meditation and or saying. I might die today. This is not negative. Death is normal and by saying this it helps us to accept this basic fact. It has given me a sense of peace. My family have always known that if I am on life support with no hope of a recovery I want the 'plug pulled' so to speak.

[@sammygee2925]

Thank you, both of you. Thought provoking, and emotive. I lost my father in July. It was peaceful. Live well folks, and have those conversations x

[@SuseMck994]

Have the conversation, people. Have the conversation.

[@darkydoom]

I guess a lot of people do see it negatively, the Grim Reaper etc, but there's so much literature of people seeing it as a welcome hug at the end of a long battle. Maybe that's the draw of gothic and the macabre, the comfort and beauty if death

[@ThePojengsidur]

I’ve been thinking about death a s a concept and an event since i couldn’t even talk, just thinking about how life ends. Interesting that i didn’t think about the start of life.

[@LolaPopente]

great episode Dr Karan xx

[@darkydoom]

I just got the Goddess of the Underworld, Persephone, tattooed on my back. She helps lead the recently dead to Hades ❤ not to mention also bringing Spring to the world and flowers and harvest etc

[@patriciaosullivan4973]

Physically, emotionally and most importantly spirituality. God is most merciful most kind❤

[@danielwilda8167]

Love this information gives so much comfort thanks 👍⭐️💙🙋‍♂️🌈

[@chbu8346]

I want my consciousness in a proxy. I want to see where we go as a species and would love to travel space to see new things.

[@silverghostcat1924]

I can see why not using the word cancer could be more helpful, because the word cancer equates to death in many people's minds. It carries a weight that isn't always justified. In my mind, the Grim Reaper gets a bad rap. He's there to accompany the dead to the other side, so they don't get stuck here.

[@sharonmassey2923]

My only concern are those zealous doctors mentioned, who probably haven't dealt with their own death issues and are forcing them onto others, plus their ego. And don't get me started on assisted self-euthenasia - I hold the "bizarre" notion that I own my body; and no one has the right to tell me what to do with it. In both cases, I would much prefer to have a vet for a doctor, who does not believe in pointless and unnecessary suffering. Pets are treated with far more compassion and sanity in this adolescent culture than humans.

[@leonardogonzalez5171]

17:54 I would argue that just like hormone therapy there is people making money off these treatments with insurance and they truly don't care about humans they are drugged by money and blind and if you don't believe there is greedy people who would let this happen I'd argue you purposely ignorant.

[@Gustav.J]

This is why I pay for internet.

[@warbler1984]

I'm not sure I agree with you. We can't make death a flashy cool thing. While we can make the grim reaper look colourful like día de los muertos at the end of the day we dont want to miss our experiences and loved ones and no amount of death propaganda can give that back to us

[@emilyh50]

I want to live. I'm sorry. I'll be better.

[@melusine826]

41:26 yeah, the ableism hits hard

[@clareselgin3208]

I imagine that for a CPR nurse the phrase “healthy body” might just mean, a working heart and lungs

[@gayledavies6608]

My grandfather always used to tell me "there's only one thing you have to do in life and that is to die". He had a fair point. I watched him pass away and although it made me sad, I know all my grandparents are around me almost guiding me through life. I just live for each day. I said I could go outside my front door and get run over. Enjoy life while you can. My mum had bowel cancer twice and has an ileostomy bag and had breast cancer. Caught them all early. When she had issues with one lot of bags she had, I told her that it was a technical hitch and when you find the right ones, you'll be able to continue to live your life. That's what she's going to start doing now.