The 3 Word Rule to Find Your Personal Style - No Shopping Required :)

[@irenejohnson9614]

Hi, Alyssa. It took me a whole year to find my three words! I asked trusted friends, trusted relatives, took quizzes, looked up definitions, reviewed posts, videos, and blogs by influencers such as yourself. I was able to let go of (sell, donate, give away to friends and family) things that I knew were no longer me (because I turned 70 this past summer). Finally I was left with me and my closet., as you said. And today, I have been blessed to come up with the three words that best fit my style: Classic. Uncontrived. Appropriate. Thank you. You are so much younger than me, but I love your spirit and the creative encouragements I get from you. Be blessed.

[@PK-nf3jg]

A few years ago when I found myself in a style rut, I reverse-engeneered using a similar method. I started off by asking myself for I wanted to feel/look like in my clothes and put together a list of words, which I then reduced to the top 3. I made separate word lists for work, social and everyday because I realised I wanted different moods (E.g. confident, put-together, mysterious, eclectic, relaxed, adventurous....) Then based on the lists I was able to identify wardrobe gaps/what changes I wanted to make. E.g. I wanted to look a bit more elegant and polished, yet I had a bunch of chunky casual sweaters, but not thinner/more fitted classic ones that would suit my 'polished/elegant ' mood, thanks to the lists I was able to avoid automatically buying yet another casual chunky sweater, but expend my wardrobe options with a black cashmere sweater which made me feel more elegant, confident and timeless...

[@happytofu5]

Hah, I am right now trying to do the same. I have lots of comfy clothes, but I'd like to expand a bit more, to have different clothes for different moods. Sometimes I wake up and feel like a little gremlin, so I need to cater for that as well as for days I feel like a queen. (And those that make me feel like a gremlin queen, haha).

[@gabriellea201]

I love this! Thank you for the inspiration!

[@marinasaburova]

This is a lovely idea! I’m struggling to find myself right now so I like the concept of deciding how I want to feel first

[@sherryobar5750]

Very well said!

[@Kimbrasa]

THIS is the cherry-on-top advice that I needed to add to this video. I have a 20yo wardrobe built on hiding my full-figured "motherly frame" that expanded well beyond the slim feminine style I was used to in my pre-maternal years. So, I can't look at my current wardrobe to find "my style" bc it's basically a survivalist wardrobe. But to consider what I want NOW and how do I want to present myself to the world on any given day is the ticket for me. I'm excited to build my "three-word" lists for different sides of my life. Thanks so much for sharing this!!! 😊 🤗

[@stephsmith5969]

Since I retired a few years ago, I have struggled to find a style which was removed from smart workwear but still stylish. To be honest my three words had become comfortable, shapeless, careless. So your videos have been very helpful in making me have a reboot. I've cleared out a lot of stuff from my wardrobe, baggy pants with giraffes on, long loose and shapeless tops, frumpy shoes. But I found that amongst all that was a core of a better style which I can build on. A baggy shirt when tucked into jeans, with a nice leather belt was transformed for example. A dress when shortened a few centimetres, looked quite different. Making careful and considered choices when shopping is giving me a more put-together feeling. But I don't want to lose that bit of myself which is unique and which those silly trousers with giraffes on reflected. It just needs a better outlet. I've loved this video and also loved reading the replies from other people. It seems that this bit of homework has been transformative for many. After some time thinking about it, I've decided my three words, which I aspire to are authentic, classy, relaxed.

[@comealongcomealong4480]

@Steph Smith Still having a giggle about your baggy, giraffe-print pants. You may have needed that time out after retiring - just to relax, and depressurise - and giraffe pants were possibly your bridge. I hope the new, authentic you is coming together well now. Thanks for sharing your humor with us here 😀

[@trishagoodwin4069]

Steph, I am exactly the same, got lost, having retired a few years ago. My style, while working in art and design, was very similar to Alyssa's but goingfor black, ivory and dark olive green. Now retired and living in the countryside, where I need to be waterproofed most days outside and veryone wears the baggy pants with giraffe type clothing, I sort of lost my edge - apart from when travelling on holiday, when reverted to type a bit. Unfortunately, everyone my age around me wears the frumpy "fun" prints and even more frumpy, old lady shoes, so have had a fear of standing out, or rather thinking maybe time to go with them. But not happy this way, so having to rethink things, Alyssa's advice is a lot better, although not designed for our specific age group, than the stuff that is meant for over 60s. I find a lot of those sites have just ghastly suggestions and choices.

[@JBUHJBUH]

I'd like those baggy giraffe pants, lol! I'd probably wear them with a tucked in jumper with fitted shoulder seams, sleek sandals/ boots with a cinched coat, & a shiny belt, though!

[@debbiec9526]

I’m living the same reality in retirement. Finding a Style that works. Help.

[@gailmills1113]

Love this post.

[@sherikennedy4117]

my sunday morning "must do" is watching your newest video! really tough for me to find three words. why? i live in scrubs at least 4 days a week. i needed to really look at my life outside of the hospital setting. difficult to do as the days off i mostly veg out at home. so...how to come up with them, i guess i had to look at when i go on holiday and travel. what do i look for there....how do i like to dress on a cruise or going to visit family. so for me, i had to look at life outside of "every day" life as i tend to gravitate to certain things that i can pack in one carry on bag no matter if it is for a long weekend or 3 weeks away. you have really helped me hone in on: classic, comfort, minimal. this video was very helpful as i am in the process of trying to let go of pieces i have spent tons of money on, but never ever reach for.

[@AlyssaBeltempo]

Ah that is a challenge! So glad this video helped! xx

[@liatori6214]

I am a nurse too and have similar needs as yours. So I have a "house uniform ": black jazz pants, black short sleeve and black long sleeve t-shirts. I am looking for organic material. I have numerous items of them and keep them rolled up in IKEA SKUBB boxes in a drawer. They fit my adjectives: classic, basic and comfortable, thank you Alyssa, what a great idea, I love categorizations. And the adjectives fit my clothes for leaving home or when I feel to be "dressed" as well. I do not need many pieces, so classic works for me to look and feel alright and without thinking about dressing too much. That goes for basic as well, it's just simple. And 'comfortable' is a must for me. I have my seasonal items on hand, going through my closet twice a year. That's enough for me. And I hang my clothes organized by colors, pleasing to my eyes. ☺

[@NN-iu2rp]

Wearing scrubs is so great at work, but I found it made me incredibly lazy when dressing outside my work life. All I wanted to wear was comfy clothes and then felt sluby even thought my clothes were clean, but they fit similar to my scrubs. Definitely hard, but I really like how you've look outside the box for your words and am going to try the same.

[@winifredearl5031]

I'm a nurse too 😇 and wear scrubs 3/4 days a week, but I sew alot of my closet...so always recreating looks....love fashion, but it's always edgy and Quirky 😉

[@sarahroberts3840]

Classic, minimal and comfort. I often struggle, as I feel my looks are boring. Your idea about the need for a opposite word, really resonated.

[@trisha3338]

I love this idea! My three words would be contemporary, minimal, Bohemian. I do not dress like most people my age (76), but always stay stylish. I like to stay current and follow trends, but I also know what looks good on my body. As an example, I love off-the-shoulder tops. They are considered a little Boho, but are very flattering on women "of a certain age." They cover the tops of your arms, and just reveal the skin that doesn't age (shoulders/collarbone)!

[@heidimeigs5192]

Classic, Boho, Casual. I have 3 shopping weaknesses; shoes, logo/band tee shirts, white shirts/tees. I love linen, blue jeans, cut off denim shorts. I’m 65 now, live in Alabama where we have brutally hot and humid summers. I’m retired, no longer even own high heels or even a dressy pr of trousers. No longer color my hair, rarely wear much if any makeup. I use shoes, purses, jewelry, sunglasses to add color and texture to classic and casual outfits. I know there are lots of women who probably identify as I do. But we’ll all do it in a different way. I like neutral colors, navy, gray, blush pink…..but these colors don’t have to be boring. I have never, ever been called boring. I get boho, even hippie, a fair amount. Also get asked where I bought a specific item when I’m in classic mode. I know how to dress my frame/shape. Happy Easter to all who celebrate. 🙏🏻

[@xiomaras95]

I’ve learned so much from you. I love skirts, mostly silk, satin or flowing but I like to combine them with button down shirts, comfortable flat shoes and minimal jewelry and I’m 75! I never close my mind to learning. I have a bridal shower and a wedding coming up and I’ve shopped my own closet for both. Have kept old evening bags (my Mom used to love to thrift) and it’s surprising what I have. Some are treasures. I also have crochet skirts and blouses and sweaters which she made but all in soft colors - none of the patchwork and loud color stuff. stuff. My three words might be feminine, comfortable, mixture of very old and new. Your videos are great.

[@AlyssaBeltempo]

You will look fab at those events! Thanks for watching! xx

[@garlicgirl3149]

YES!!!

[@xiomaras95]

Thank you both. I finally feel confident in my own skin. it took me a few years to pull myself together after my husband’s passing. Now I’m finding me at last, dressing for me and watching Alyssa has taught be to experiment and find my style. . I have heard so much negativity from family about you should wear more makeup, cut your hair this way and that, you should wear this and that. They mean well but I realize I have to be me with no apologies to anyone. Thank you both for the encouragement. It helps!

[@lisa-janeomalley7041]

can I come over and raid your wardrobe

[@JennAndTonik]

I turn 50 I’m a few weeks and have really been reflecting on where my style is and where it goes as I head into this next phase of my life. I’ve felt a bit at a loss (body changes, lifestyle changes, career changes) but your videos are helping me flesh it all out. ❤️

[@mangisty1007]

Omg! I am turning 50 in December and I have been wondering about this myself! I don’t think I have ever found my style and now it really feels like I am lost! I am overwhelmed with so much information and styles! Good luck!

[@amyvanslambrook]

I’m with you..50 is coming up and it’s a beautiful chance for resetting, elevating and aligning. @alyssa

[@winifredearl5031]

I'm 50, and embracing it. My 3 words are edgy, creative, magpie...(I love silver jewelry 😍) This was a fun experiment...I'm very comfortable with my individual style.

[@christinemichele2318]

Same here! Love this comment and these videos. Helping redefine for the next chapter….

[@SheIsFearfullyWonderfullyMade]

50 is by no means old so don’t get me wrong BUT your comment made me think about this comedian talking about what her “old lady uniform” is going to be😂 it’s hilarious, you should look it up here on KZbin… it’s only like a 3 minute video, it’s so funny

[@ladyparmelee1003]

Love this method! Even though my overall style is classic, my three descriptive words would be: structured, effortless, powerful. They speak to my love of looking put-together with minimal pieces, with high-end impact.

[@Jusyna24071981]

I am stealing your words!!! :)

[@maryfitzpatrick3252]

At 74, I am still bubbly, attentive to detail, and impetuous. However my 3 style words are subtle, minimal, neutral. I wear mostly black, navy, deep camel. Solid colors. So I wear knits which have ease. You taught me to balance with a third piece, which I prefer to be architectural to create tension.

[@melodypatrick3707]

This is one that I’ve actually been thinking about for a while. I recently settled on the three “C’s”, which describe me well at this stage of my life: classic, creative and comfortable!

[@pollyking8577]

Like many others who have commented, I have been going through a style identity crisis. I just turned 60 and it feels like I need to breathe some life back into my style. I have recently gone down the Kibbe rabbit hole more than I care to admit. I mostly thrift shop, which is good and bad (good to recycle, but bad because I end up with a lot of "cheap stuff" that I don't wear). But this video was really what I needed (all your slow fashion content is what I need now to be honest). Your advice helps me to simplify and relax, and lean into what makes me me. My three words (today) are nostalgic, simple, and guileless. As you suggested, I'll try it out for a while and see if it sticks. Thanks for making this all so much more approachable. Peace.

[@amyobrien1242]

my 3 words are cozy, academic, unexpected. thanks for this video!!! love your philosophy and the way you present concepts!! thank you❤

[@TheMaryWriter]

I've been doing this for years, it is so fun! I could use a variety of words but I think that my core three are clean, organic, and whimsical. I use clean to describe my general overall technique--I don't dress in loud or visually cluttered pieces, and I use variations of classic pieces that capture the polish but not always the sharp tailoring and structure. I use organic to describe my colors, the soft lines, drape, patterns, and fabrics, as well as the more natural earthy elements of my style. I use whimsical as the catch-all for the fun details and playfulness of my style--I love vintage elements and pieces (more on the antique end) and there's sort of an imaginative tone to my pieces. I settled on these because classic is too formal, boho is usually too western/worn, and minimal is too simple for what I wear, although I see elements of all three in how I dress.

[@skylerfirestone851]

Looe the way you have explained your words. I can really relate with this line: ' classic is too formal, boho is usually too western/worn, and minimal is too simple'.

[@andressachapman5]

I love the use of Clean here vs Classic. I’ve been trying to find a different word for Classic b/c Classic can tend to sound older and a bit too generic for me. Clean nails it for me for the exact reason you illustrated. Thank you!

[@bringela4531]

You and I are style twins Mary 😊

[@Deanna52ish]

My words are Grandchildren-Peanut Butter-Jelly-seriously. I love your style and the three word concept is a genius way to pin point a persons style. Thank you Alyssa.

[@AlyssaBeltempo]

ahhh love this!

[@TColoradoF]

That is a beautiful vibe! You could could also add playful!

[@dear.charity8741]

This is maybe my favourite of all your videos, just so good! My three are comfortable, feminine and effortless like I just threw it on. Thanks again for explaining personal style and helping us get to our own style without over consumption.

[@AlyssaBeltempo]

wow thank you so much! It's my pleasure - love effortless!

[@chelsealeighpaul3771]

So I pulled this video up again after a weekend of shopping but only purchasing one pair of sneaks yet had a wish list to pull from. I told my husband I just don’t know my style. I’m working the following words: - [ ] Effortless - [ ] Sporty - [ ] Casual / undone - [ ] Comfort - [ ] Functional I have three lives: professional fitness educator, outdoor adventurer, fashionista wanna e who loves brunch and city tours. So yeah…. I’m in my 46th year trying to figure it all out while really scaling down to save $ and live a more sustainable lifestyle.

[@comealongcomealong4480]

@chelsealeighpaul3771 Reading your post 4 mo later. Do you think it's possible that One or Two style words are true for the three parts of your life. And the other One or Two are specific to that pursuit. For example 'Functional, Comfort' for your fitness educating and hiking. Plus maybe 'Sporty Styling Features'. The city embracing part of your life could be 'Casual/Undone, Comfort' plus 'Effortless' 😊

[@kimmaguire3621]

I really like the idea of looking more at your personality rather than aesthetics for 3 word inspiration. I’m thinking about smart, modern, approachable. For me I think smart works better than classic because I’m not one for nostalgia or romantic dressing, modern I like better than minimal because I like clean lines but not really a statement and then approachable because that’s really important to me in terms of how I show up in the world and it also suggests causal and comfort which Are important from a lifestyle perspective. Wow, that’s a lot and fun!

[@davidjohnston9356]

I asked my husband. He thought eclectic was my style. Hmm, I would say minimal ( only 2 colors, and hardly any pattern) , classic, and sporty. ( working as a PT). This was a fun exercise. I agree with everyone loving that black dress. But everything looks beautiful on you. 🍃

[@AlyssaBeltempo]

Nice! Glad you liked it! xx

[@angelaa.9915]

Yes, the 3 word method has definitely helped me to not add certain pieces to my wardrobe. For me, the idea of tying the three words to my own personality or essence helped. My words are casual, straightforward, and off-beat.

[@leidylopera4998]

Watching your videos brings so much pleasure, it’s a combination of the amazing background, your soothing voice and the valuable content. Pure Joy!!!!

[@AlyssaBeltempo]

ahhh thank you!!

[@christineward477]

Comfortable, Creative, Romantic. My sister has shared many of your videos with me, and now I am sharing with all my friends who compliment me on how I mix patterns and textures in my outfits. I have always done this, but your tips have helped me to shop less and give away all my disjointed and uncomfortable pieces, which almost always resulted from binge shopping. Thank you!!

[@tanyaeve9498]

Some great 3 words on here! I think I am pragmatic, eclectic and dramatic. I very much favour functional, weather appropriate clothes, but enjoy lots of different influences, including retro, vintage pieces and often have something dramatic or statement in an outfit.

[@rhonaklipp]

Loved this video and went through the exercise with my daughter. Having to search for words that aren't typically used was a helpful challenge. My words are uncomplicated, movement & classic. I've recently turned 60 and find myself getting comfortable with a certain style but didn't know how to describe it. I think it's important to stay "modern" but you can still do that within your three words. I appreciate the comments Trisha333 made below. My daughter's words are comfortable, earthy & detailed. They really come into play when we go shopping together. This was a really fun exercise! Thank you.

[@liavanus]

I really love this guide and found it so helpful in refining the description of my style. My 3 words are “ non-conformist, utilitarian, and roguish “

[@suethurber3745]

Great words! They speak to me too. Will spend some time after work today to come up with mine.

[@_inflection3209]

Great choices!!

[@AlyssaBeltempo]

I'm so glad you liked it Lia! Your 3 words aree amazing!!! 🤩 ❤️

[@allysonrogers4389]

Roguish is a fabulous word!

[@garlicgirl3149]

Oooo! Laa Laaa!

[@kimfaherty2978]

So helpful, Allyssa. My three words, for now, are classic, comfortable and chic. I embody the Grandma Coastal vibe and have for some time. Thanks for all the lovely style lessons!

[@missmayflower]

Had to look that up. Llbean, right?

[@AlyssaBeltempo]

Love these! Grandma Coastal vibe ftw! xx

[@kimfaherty2978]

@@missmayflower Have you heard of the brand Faherty? Things that look like their stuff. Lots of linen and cotton in whites, creams, blues and beiges in the summer. Hats and quality accessories. Minimal classic jewelry.

[@missmayflower]

@@kimfaherty2978 thanks for the info. Hadn’t heard of them.

[@lindatyler4331]

Thank you for this video! If someone doesn't make it to the end of your videos they are not worthy of your effort! You are the BEST youtuber of all youtubers! My words are classic, comfortable, and me!

[@sandramaki7819]

Loved this video! My three words don’t seem to make any sense but after many years of reflection I know that they are colourful, edgy and feminine. I love bright colours and dresses ( feminine) but I also love jeans and leather jackets (edgy). So funny that you bought that black dress which I find dramatic in style. I actually just thrifted a similar looking Georgio Armani long violet linen dress with a slit. I feel amazing in it! I thought I would hardly wear it but I have already worn it 4 times., dressed up lady with heels and dressed down with a denim jacket and sneakers. When you know your style, you know what you are going to wear a lot! Thanks for another amazing video! Hugs from Montreal 💚💚💚

[@DestinyFerreira29]

i like what you said about minimal being simple w impactful, visual elements... this made me pause. i have always thought minimalism as being somewhat "boring" yet i find myself gravitating towards a less fussy, unembellished style which i have been resisting because i didnt want to lose my " flavor." you have just helped me to rethink my view on a simpler style and given me " permission " to embrace this new look for myself. Thank you. I always glean so much from your teaching. I so appreciate how you break things down and thoroughly explain and introduce new concepts... my life has been care giving for the last ten years so what i like no longer suits my daily life style... i'm not sure what my words are because i'm still clinging to my fantasy life but i do wear a lot of striped cotton button downs w either pencil skirts or jean skirts and sandals, so maybe i am tailored, casual, sophisticated? hmmm.... i like the sound of that. effortless ease... Huge Thanks Alyssa!!!

[@DFBurgermeister]

I thought about how you arrived at your three words and noticed that jeans and a tee are my uniform, so to speak, so I selected Classic. The best part of my day is right after lunch when a take a nap with my dogs - relaxed. I like color and patterns, especially stripes and polka dots, so my third word is playful. When I look in my closet, these seem to fit. Classic, relaxed, playful.

[@rebeccajordan4491]

My style keywords for years have been “earthy, edgy, light.” I’ve really enjoyed this combination and have found them to be applicable to a wide variety of interpretations. I’m currently playing with a combination of boho, rock chic, and clean girl aesthetics which really connect to my keywords beautifully.

[@kfelong3111]

Flowy, layered, unexpected - brilliant method! Great filter and diagnostic tool. This is the distinct value of your channel, Alyssa. You teach and give us real concepts and tools we can apply! Thank you. Kathy Erie, Pa.

[@AlyssaBeltempo]

Thank you so much Kathy - I really appreciate it and love your words! xx

[@wrendor9465]

Love this!

[@rachaelm6882]

As someone who lives in a climate with very cold winters I'm loving the word layered.

[@catherinecluning9093]

I love the word "unexpected"! I think I might have to steal that one as one of my three words.

[@yukeunjeon7210]

Your three words are awesome. I can picture you.

[@jemstar7592]

I love this! I've recently fallen in love with all things linen and have purchased a few pieces for the Summer. I think my words are Elegant, Comfortable and Feminine. My happiest times are when I'm out walking in nature and cooking. Ciao from Vancouver Canada.

[@kaitlinwile2053]

I absolutely loved this video, thank you for posting. I am definitely still cultivating my personal style. It's fun to me to see how my style has evolved through the years. Now at 35 years old, the clothing bits that excite me are something my 20 year old self would scoff at. My 3 words are androgynous, timeless, elevated. What a fun exercise!

[@kelleymontana7526]

I'm a little late in the game here, but a friend of mine recommended this video. Excellent! I've recently discovered your vlogs and am binging them. Thanks for the thoughtful content. My three words for now are classic, coastal and flirty. I hope that lot's of other folks find this video from a year ago. It's a keeper for the archives.

[@magpie1206]

My 3 words are multitasking, transitional and polished. I’m in healthcare pretty much wear scrubs on the daily. But outside I’m always on the go so I wear clothes that is corresponds to my life but yet still looks and feels polished because that is when I feel my best.. so I’ve been living linens and flowy texttures

[@denisealee]

This was so helpful- I’m 51, and recently semi-retired, so I’m sorting out how my style might need adjusting in this new season. I think for now, my three words are: timeless, relaxed, and minimal. Now, sorting those out will be another challenge, but I think I’m headed in the right direction! Thank you for the guidance :)

[@janitapanos240]

You nailed your personal style words! I’m really embracing your method as it’s a way to be both creative and focussed. I’m classic, feminine/girly & polished.

[@eileenchang2173]

@ Juanita, for polished my synonym is “chic” , where I like to ‘update’ my polished looks.

[@victoriah.2083]

My 3 words: creative, quirky/whimsical (an ethnic vibe w dab of fun), romantic. I usually say my style is: bohemian chic meets romantic steampunk goth with a dash of relaxed sportswear. Together it is quirky or whimsical. I use a lot of vintage costume jewelry and scarves for color, pattern, texture and cohesiveness. Thanks for your great pointers and ab-fab location background.

[@helenehelene1321]

Great exercise! I think mine are Natural (easy-going styling, relaxed fit, natural fabrics and earthy colors), Artistic (play with silhouettes, colors and textures) and Polished (I love both my wardrobe and outfits to be highly curated and fine-tuned). Thanks for the challenge 😉

[@rjones3955]

Classic, organic, modern. I really resisted the three words concept, but then they just landed on me and I can't escape how useful they are and how important they feel to my style personality.

[@AlyssaBeltempo]

Ah glad it was a light bulb moment for you!

[@JBUHJBUH]

I'm an Unruffled Bird of Paradise (for casualwear) or a Practically Polished Bird of Paradise (work/ party/ more formalwear)! EDIT Breaking it down: ~ *Unruffled/ Practical* (somewhat relaxed/ languid fits - perhaps the 'undone' you mentioned? Not sure I dress 'cheeky' but my hair is messy (curly) & my clothes are never perfectly pressed/ unscrunched, lol) . ~ *Polished* (some structure, like fitted shoulders/ waist & my love of jewellery, but nothing too fussy that gets in the way of my curves or getting stuff done - see above!) ~ *Bird of Paradise* (specifically referring to the Raggiana Bird of Paradise - not the typical tropical colours but still bright! My base neutral is brown, my colours are orange/ yellow/ teal, & my seasonal accents are plum/ coral/ chartreuse. Also to denote some drama, but on the softer/ feathered end of the spectrum). Thanks for articulating the process into words with this video - it makes it much easier for me to veer AWAY from: ~ buying too many party dresses (all dressed up with nowhere to go 🥲), ~ non machine washable fabrics (what's a dry cleaner, lol?) ~ stiff designs (I prefer organic prints & shapes over harsh geometrics or starched collars).😢

[@iamgoddesskouture]

My three words are comfort, effortless, and impactful. I like clothing that allows me to move freely while still looking feminine and a statement piece that's a conversation starter.💃🏾

[@kinethecoach]

I think my key phrase after decluttering and finding the key pieces I love wearing is: Elegant, Creative, Professional with a touch of color or sass. ✨

[@VyseSoloQ]

So I purged through my closet 2 days ago. It felt really elevating that I made my husband purge through his. We are first-time parents, and time management is important to use. Less laundry for both of us and for me, less time thinking about what I'm going to wear. Based of my wardrobe now(after so many videos, past pictures, my new daily life and time in the closet😂), i realized my style Is polished + functional + romantic. I'v grown to love dresses over the past 2 years. I love color but I love black. So it's like a Edgy Romance when I'm not wearing to much color. It's also fun mixing masculine and feminine. Iv been drooling over Blazer dresses for a while now😂 These videos help so much! ❤

[@carencarr4459]

I love your words!!!

[@lindascull6327]

Oh wow this video was totally what I needed I just don't know why it always amazes me how much information Clarity and creativity you bring to my life thank you so so much Alyssa!! Since retirement and lifestyle changes I've downsized my closet which has caused sort of a identity crisis-- hard to explain-- but just in these few minutes of watching your video I know which direction I am heading of course I'm going to rewatch and take notes love you honey! I hope all is well and I do pray for you and yours!

[@AlyssaBeltempo]

Excellent! This is such high praise Linda, thank you for watching!

[@CFW1]

Linda, I know exactly what you mean about downsizing the wardrobe and then feeling like a fashion identity crisis is happening. I completely get it! The same thing has recently happened to me. This video is helpful and really got me thinking. I feel like I can move forward with sort of a fashion purpose using my new three words which better define my style (classic, colorful and balanced).

[@Mega.bibleprincess]

My style aesthetic is : stay at home princess … like whimsical girly but lounge-ish so like a combo of princess jasmine pants and rapunzel like dresses but with Giselle flair

[@juleannedawson9287]

Great tips. I need to work on my Three words. I think classic would be one. Loved the examples of styles you showed. Very helpful.

[@wanderingmargnrich]

I came up with Conservative, Timeless, Understated as a first cut. Thank you so much for your awesome content. I feel like I'm finally finding myself at age 58 and without a struggle.

[@brownhairedgirl23]

Refined/ elegant, bright/ optimistic, and romantic/ feminine. I’m currently deciding which words are the better options. Thank you for breaking it down into such a helpful video x

[@nicolehood6408]

When I first discovered your channel several years ago, I chose my three words as "confident, successful, and stylish", because I wanted to feel confident, to convey succes, and to dress in a way that not only made sense for my surroundings, but were classic timeless looks indicative of good style. I recently attended my second shop your closet event, and I'm re-evaluating my three words. I think I want to focus more on how I feel and less on what I want to communicate with my style choices. After all, I'm still likely going to get annoying comments about "but you're so young! (usually in response to a life experience I'm having. I'm not as young as people assume, and clearly, I'm old enough to have the experience I'm having)" and various other annoying or inaccurate things people choose to believe about me. So, I want my three words to focus more on my experience than others' beliefs. I'm now leaning toward "classic, intentional, stylish". I find that I am thoughtful and intentional about what I wear to work in the garden, what I wear on the weekend to go grocery shopping, and what I wear on zoom calls and in person for work. I love a collared shirt with most every outfit, and even decided that since that's what I like and feel best in, I would invest in secondhand denim button-downs for gardening. So, I still feel intentional even when I'm mowing the lawn. It's great! In my ideal world, I would be able to do some gardening on a saturday, change out of the muddy pants and boots, put on a pair of flats and a pair of jeans, and be ready to go (the reality is, there's usually a shower involved and a whole outfit changed), but the idea is I could be quickly ready to go because my outfit choices are intentional enough no matter what I'm doing.

[@Bruh-wg5kh]

Your voice and way of communicating is my “aesthetic”. Calm, smooth, light, a touch of prep and fun, and well-thought.

[@jellybebe2753]

Wonderful! My words are vibrant, austere, and balanced. So I like to mix it up with one bright, patterned piece and a plain piece, preferably in a different shape ie flowy + fitted, or formal + informal. Thanks for helping me to figure this out!

[@louiseparisotto3630]

Great video! My three words: Classic (style), Comfortable (to wear (i.e. no crisp cotton for me even though I love the look) and move) and Easy (to put together, wash, take care of, travel with). Intuitively I've shopped with these words in my head but didn't realize the 'why'. Now I do! Love your style, your explanations and help that you're able to share with us. We all would like your figure to show case our wardrobe!

[@margaretmoore1608]

I have that blouse, those shorts, that belt, but I’ve never worn them like that. I’ve been bogged down with grunge, and I want to have a more cosmopolitan look. People around me will get nervous if I change my style. It takes courage to change.

[@shopaholicdena1692]

Elevated, feminine, & creative are my words. I choose creative for flexibility since I also like to play with different styles occasionally (like edgy, glam, boho, colorful, retro, relaxed, etc.). I don't feel like every outfit has to meet all 3 words, but most do. Figuring the out did help me define my style and felt good to do.

[@tabithayamaguchi-burtrum4797]

I was nervous when I first heard about this method, as I didn't think my personal style could be boiled down to three words. Then I thought maybe I could, if I gave three sets of three words to each of my lifestyle wardrobes: work, casual/weekend, and gym. After thinking it over some more, I realized that I really wanted three words that tied each of my lifestyles together and would allow me to minimize clutter in my closet. So, finally, I came up with three words to describe me and what I want to keep moving toward: Edgy, Elegant, and Easy-Going. Thank you for this wonderful and eye-opening method!

[@kelly851]

I would say my three words are comfortable (not frumpy) feminine and classic. I enjoy non flashy prints, flowy fabrics mixed with a bit of structure and anything that will silently and beautifully convey my kind, carefree and fun personality. I enjoy being feminine without being boho as i am not into over emphasized expression but rather enjoy keeping that mystery and privacy that i cherish. Iam a pisces, a retired floral designer focused on weddings and as a hobby i am a nature ,landscape photographer. This background shaped my style in clothing and truly has defined me as a woman inside and out. Thank you for such a fun and interesting perspective on personal style.

[@millymay0025]

At the start of the video I was thinking my words are Classic, minimal and laid back…. So I smiled when you almost said the same thing. The only issue I struggle with is that I have a 34 D bust and it’s challenging finding the right pieces with those 3 characteristics for a more curvy figure.

[@hockey0013]

It took me years to understand this, and truthfully I think finding my style was a result of understanding who I am as a person. My words would be delicate, free spirited, dreamy. Lovely video 💗

[@jeremyagain]

I watched this twice. I think my three words are effortless, comfort and versatile 😁

[@ruth9391]

I just became a mom along with my body change I have changed. It’s been hard to find my style again. I lack the time I use to have to put together looks. I have also found that I just don’t really like much in my closet anymore. My 3 words. Feminine, light, minimal. Thank you for your help!

[@personal-jessicastrutz5362]

I agree! My little guy turns 1 next month. I still don't know how in the world to dress my new mom bod! My old clothes just don't fit the same. I simply do not want to wear the styles I used to love now that I have a totally different body. So here I am doing some research. Trying to figure out how to start fresh and find a style I like for a body I am still not used to! I spent 36 years in my old body! It is quite the undertaking.

[@marilyndoering2501]

Another very helpful video! I feel that my 3 style words are classic, feminine, and dramatic. I love to add a scarf, a pop of colour, a hat, an interesting “something” to elevate an otherwise basic tailored outfit. I just love that black dress you featured for the drama it creates as you are moving.

[@AlyssaBeltempo]

So nice - these are classic! And thank you I enjoy it:)

[@karonmalingo5798]

I am pear-shaped so, to minimize this, my "three" words are column, (one)color, (narrowish & flowy) skirts. Three words are hard! Also, I focus on everything around my face and narrow shoulders with a great haircut, jewelry, hats, and scarves. I guess my style is multiple words. You are wonderful, Alyssa, even for a 71-year-old. Cheers.

[@shawnrobertson9618]

Good exercise! Thanks. First word: Easy. Then I might adopt your minimal word. And, then something like designed, flair, unusual - I love pieces that play with the pattermaking - slightly different cuts or forms that still flatter the body.

[@Sandra-rk4mu]

I am very late to the 3-word party! I’ve really struggled with styling myself as I never really matured out of student clothes. A few years ago I moved countries and in the process downsized hugely (think one big suitcase). This gave me the opportunity to really start from scratch but I fell into old patterns. However within the mess I’ve identified my 3 words as tailored (streamlining), natural (anything even vaguely polyester never gets worn), and edgy (always a little something sharp, or bolder). Thank you for this video ❤

[@halliebass]

Three words: Quite a challenge! Chic, casual with a funky touch!

[@odessalovett1544]

This was great! I've identified my three descriptors and it puts "bella figura" back into the joy of a curated wardrobe!👏😄👏

[@clairegoodman2825]

I’ve been thinking about this for a while, so thanks for this video! I’m leaning towards classic, colorful, and unfussy. I like simple, classic shapes and not too much detail, but I like to wear mostly non-neutral colors (fall colors mainly).

[@ghazalrad5554]

Wow this video was really helpful and you are creative ❤ I think my 3 word would be Classic Feminine Powerful (or comfortable) not sure yet

[@melissalonla]

This is so helpful! My 3 words for now are Volume: big shoes, platform shoes, voluminous skirts/dresses, baggy hoodies and pants; items must take up space Interest: all pieces must have some visually interesting details, be it the cut, the texture (I especially love velvet), an embroidery, a graphic print…no basic pieces) Romanticized: fur boots and accessories in the winter, tropical prints in the summer, gingham dresses for picnics, etc

[@elizabethnamy6053]

Classic-Trim-Simple. Thank you for all of your videos- I've been a fan since your beginning!

[@AlyssaBeltempo]

Ooh like those! Thank you so much for sticking around Elizabeth! xx

[@that90skid67]

This was so helpful. I didn’t even have to get anything out of my closet! I’m minimal and classic but edgy. Thank you so much! I think keeping these words in mind when I’m shopping will help me a lot

[@abimarshall9284]

I stumbled on this video while trying to pack and not overpack for a 10 day vacation. Love the 3 word idea, still working on it, but so far, I've come up with creative, bold, sassy. I'm now a new subscriber.

[@kathyhoyer4586]

Thank you for helping me figure this mystery out...WHAT IS MY STYLE? So simple 3 words! Also, I really like your examples your explanation helped a lot to clarify the mental process. I have been experimenting with buying clothes from the thrift store and it has helped me understand that just because I "like" them and they fit...they are not really my style. So this helps me a lot! three words....comfortable, playfully, effortless.

[@beckycartwright2634]

I think my three words are romantic, edgy and soft 😊 my primary focus is generally to be warm as I live in the uk and feel the cold, but I don’t want to spend my time in just jumpers and jeans - I want to feel feminine and attractive. But, there is absolutely an edge to my personality, my aesthetic, my tastes and my Pinterest board! They feel quite contrasting but I’m excited to play with it!

[@sammym1311]

This is an interesting and difficult exercise... immediately I think curvy, cozy and rich (as in jewel tones)... but also quality, classy and easy... but I'm not gonna lie, I love "undone". Thank you for making me think!

[@AlyssaBeltempo]

so glad you found it useful!

[@robinsmith4499]

Simple - classic - edgy! These are my must words in all clothing items.

[@raewynannbenten1385]

I have four words, Sophisticated, dramatic, functional and versatile. I like my clothes to be well cut and well tailored, made out of good fabric that will last and suited to my elongated frame, (hence Sophisticated). I can’t relate at all to wearing what looks like gym sweats or PJ ‘s out in public. However exercise clothes, and hiking shoes, rainwear etc, have a place of course in my wardrobe, so practical functionality is important too. I’m quite extroverted, so I like my clothes and accessories to have just enough of a dramatic element to stand out in a sea of same same predictability. Lastly, versatility is important to me. I like every piece to earn its keep, so I like separates that can be mixed and matched and layered with many other different pieces in my wardrobe to combine a greater number of different outfits. I’m not very keen on the individual stand alone piece, that doesn’t work with anything else I own.

[@betsygiles4871]

Classic, Natural, and Athletic (plus saturated colors). Thanks Alyssa! I learn so much from you.

[@AlyssaBeltempo]

Thanks for watching Betsy! xx

[@betsyhaddox3964]

Showing the example of how you applied this in the dressing room was so great. Thank you, Alyssa!

[@cindywilkinson1610]

Thank you, you must have read my mind about providing basic building blocks to help me (us) understand good>better>best choices in clothing and style. I need more, though. I mist have been outside when all of this knowledge was being learned.

[@bellebb8673]

I've been thinking about this three word idea for awhile, and came up with classic, edgy, and whimsical. Your suggestion to tie the description into my "inner self" was what brought me to whimsical. Once I realized that, I see so much of the whimsical element in my style. It's what I feel like puts my personal stamp on things; a little artsy (but not boho), a little humorous. Now it makes sense to me why I love to add my Mexican stone and silver turtles necklace to simple clothes. Thanks so much!

[@AlyssaBeltempo]

Excellent! I'm SO glad that personal element helped!

[@Erin_abstract_art]

Alyssa, I really resonated with this video with my whole being. You really spoke to me as I have been evolving in my personal style in the last year especially. You inspired me to write down my thoughts about my personal style. Your video helped me unpack, compartmentalize, & categorize my style in ways that surprised me. My words are Earthy, Free-spirited, Minimalist.

[@Miluriel]

My words are magical, grungy and timeless. They might not make sense together to anyone, but they have really helped me the last few months :)

[@LoredanaRaud]

Thank you for a great video and method! I figured my 3 words would be: 1) flowery - I like flower patterns pretty much, but it also refers to colors of flowers in general like light pink, bright pink, red or white in general 2) clear - meaning I like simple clear colors like white, black, blue, red, bright pink, not muted, not warm, but clear also means no intricate details. 3) and finally bustling (first was hustling but negative connotation) - that refers to the fact that clothes need to be functional and confortable for me, put it on and run for miles basically.

[@ellantz]

Classic - Easy - Interesting Thanks for your great, helpful content!

[@celiatambor7205]

I recently did a three word quiz for fun just to see what popped out and I actually think it nailed it! Avant garde. Edgy. Sophisticated. And if there was a fourth word I’d add sculptural

[@heidih8556]

Loved this video. Years ago I worked with someone (image consultant) who used "inner beauty words" to describe your style. They are 4 words instead of 3, but I have used them with a few changes when purchasing items. My words are Softly feminine, Calm, Captivating, Quietly Determined. Overall, if I used the more common words in style, it would be Classic and Relaxed, but I think my words give more depth to just being classic and relaxed. Thanks again for the video and giving me a reminder reinforcement to use my style words.

[@emilywait3542]

I think my words are classic, casual, and creative... so glad you said tension between them is good and I loved your example with the dresses.

[@nikkisue1715]

Hello Alyssa. The three words that come to mind for me are: classic, comfortable, natural. The two white dresses you tried on definitely did not suit your style. They were beautiful dresses, but it was obvious the look was just not right. You have such a marvelous perspective on fashion that I have come to embrace. Thank you.

[@AlyssaBeltempo]

Thank you so much for the kind words xx

[@shellbell8062]

Effortless, minimal, chic. But always with a punch in the outfit with my accessories. I love sunglasses that are a little bit "extra". Great video :)

[@samnieto6463]

Effortless, masculine, flamboyant What a cool exercise!! ♥️

[@northernpixie7137]

Don’t know my three words yet but these examples were so helpful. Especially the shopping part. What a great tool for assessing why something isn’t working for you.

[@susanbastura9553]

So informative, I think I’d choose comfort, soft and flowing. I toyed with drape and loose, as well as “sleeves” (I love a unique sleeve) and boho would have to be in there, newly retired after lifetime in hospital it’s a whole new world!

[@katymcdonald5481]

Loved this video, I have a pretty good idea of my style already but thinking about the three words helped me think of so many more ways of putting outfits together to bring in all three words and really showcase my personality. My words are edgy, dramatic, bohemian.

[@AlyssaBeltempo]

Excellent! I'm so glad! xx

[@tonia-deegraveson1760]

OMGoodness thank you what a gem of a vid. I have moved to a beachside town, also retired and have taken up sewing cloths so this is just what i need to be able to choose my material for my life at present. I know i am drawn to bold colour material, i tend to sew fitted type design with structure and i always like my outfits to look a bit different. So there it is my words would be , colourful, unique and structure❤. Thank you that was fun.

[@allthingswavy6420]

Ok, so I've given this a couple of week's worth of thought :-) My style words are: Confident, Authentically Me ("No, I don't feel good in red"), and Intuitive (the very best part of me). I love clean lines, conscious contrast (in texture and color), and "no frills." I am so happy to have these descriptors as a focus! Thank you Alyssa--you're the best!

[@janponcelet8120]

That black maxi dress looks absolutely gorgeous on you. You are right. The other two dresses although lovely, didnt work for your style as well as the black one. What an interesting concept. Three elements of style. Thank you so much. Oh, what a beautiful location. The green doors, and stone carved staircase. Picturesque.

[@wakeupstylellc]

This was amazing!! I had to watch it twice to really think about my 3 words. I came up with classic, comfy and flirty. As long as those 3 elements are part of my outfit, I feel amazing! Never thought about this before 🙌🙌🙏🙏🙏😍😍😍😍