The 5 Pivotal Moments When a Narcissist Will Drop Their Mask

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Tune in to hear the perspective of a self aware narcissist. That’s me - Ben Taylor a narcissist in recovery trying to promote awareness, healing, growth and change. I do that by these videos on here, TikTok, Instagram and Facebook.
Also I try to help people with or abused by narcissism. Please reach out to me if you are a:
Victim of Narcissistic Abuse - Helping provide closure, reduce guilt and break free from the trauma bond that toxic people imprison you in.
Narcissist - I understand you better than you probably understand yourself because I have been there, I am there and I am fighting daily for a better life. You can do that too.
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#healing #toxicrelationships #narcissism #narcissist #npd

[@greylizard1040]

6. When they are tired. 7. When they have just secured their name to joint assets or property of some kind and no longer need to pretend as much that they like that other person or their family.

[@sethtamburello5628]

100% agree

[@larac0]

The thoughts of narcissistic men around women pregnant with their babies are beyond disgusting.... for the sake of humanity, I hope more people heal from these toxic patterns

[@krosado1114]

At 3 months pregnant I couldn’t take the abuse anymore and had a nervous breakdown. I finally realized that he wanted to destroy me and didn’t care about me nor the baby. I’m so grateful I managed to escape by the grace of God.

[@charlibaltimore5389]

I just went through this myself... my husband neglected me the entire pregnancy - with covid too. Sometimes he would forget to feed me even when I couldn't go up/down the steps to get to the kitchen. He had interest for the delivery around people, then neglected me immediately after we came home from the hospital after my c-section. I was helpless, had to call my mom. My daughter is 6mos old now and he still has very little interest, he comes to look at her for 20min a day and go about his business asking ridiculous questions that don't matter because he has no intention of actually taking care of her day-today needs "when did she sleep last" - all it does is piss me off. He was so awful.... I am still very much in this, but escaping soon. Crazy part is I think he's currently trying to lovebomb again, but I'm done - 10 years and I have noticed changes at ALL of this points in life and I feel so stupid for not thinking something more was there. What a waste of my time and my poor daughter misses out on the love and affection of two parents working side by side.

[@larac0]

@charlibaltimore5389 please don't beat yourself up for believing that another person was as good and decent as you are. So many of us fall for these evil manipulators, but blaming ourselves will only hurt us more and keep us weak. Be proud of all you've been able to do for yourself and your daughter without his support. Understand that society ENABLES these abusers. Sometimes, these narcissists are so good at deceiving that they even fool mental health professionals, Dr. Ramani says it herself. The attorney Rebecca Zung is excellent if you need legal advice. Both of them have youtube channels. Start making your plans and getting stronger emotionally. You can do this 💪 . You and your daughter deserve to be FREE from abuse. Better an absent parent than a toxic one

[@Elsie144k]

@@charlibaltimore5389I’m so sorry. I can very much relate. I was in extreme pain during pregnancy to the point of needing crutches to walk. I couldn’t get out of bed without help. Not only did he watch me go to work on crutches everyday in pain instead of suggesting I take maternity leave, he would resent me waking him up in the middle of the night to help me get out of bed so I could go to the bathroom. I wish I could see then what I see now. Could have saved myself a world of hurt and heartbreak. Glad you are getting out. It’s so sad for the kids

[@deb2319]

😂❤❤❤

[@miracleaustin9708]

6. If you become sick or injured.. they devalue and discard because you are no longer able to take care of them or give them what they want. At that point you are just an inconvenience.

[@LoriCadwell]

From convenience to inconvenience

[@deb2319]

​@@LoriCadwell💯📌📌

[@lha816]

This needs to be added

[@nb00]

1. Moving in together 2. Getting engaged 3. Right after marriage 4. Pregnancy 5. After kids - N likes the chase. Once in life - need to devalue you to feel better about themselves. - if attention isn't on N N will look elsewhere

[@emmarae4322]

Yep. Mine dropped the mask a month after moving in.

[@wendythompson3291]

My husband switched 2 days after getting married. I was told in a mean way, "If I don't get sex I will find it elsewhere." What a shock!! I asked him where this is coming from, and there is no response or explanation. We had dated 4 years, nothing stated prior.

[@LoriCadwell]

3 months after marriage my husband told me it wasn't working for him anymore and that he could go to the park and get a homeless woman or down the street and get a hoe to give him what he wanted

[@deb2319]

oh gawd..😢 I pray you are in a better place in space & time now. Sending Peace & PositiveVibes❤ Vibes

[@MC-cz5qd]

So disgusting that someone would discard the person carrying their child. Unbelievable, unforgivable. Makes me want to believe Karma’s a thing.

[@lobsterbisque7567]

I was fortunate, I walked away from my ex as soon as she started devaluing me. After I walked away, I did research into narcissism, and I found out that she was a narc. The relationship lasted 4mos., and after I spoke to all my loved ones about the conversations & texts we shared, and they all told me she manipulating me in very subtle ways. Thankfully, She could only reach me through my phone. And I changed my number shortly after walking away. I'm fortunate to get away from her unscathed, with no serious commitments that she could leverage to hoover me back. I feel so much better now that I'm free of her

[@thrivingnow7395]

When you catch them blatantly cheating or they let the truth slip out about betrayal = violent rage.

[@princhipessa1969]

Don’t move in with someone for years! My ex’s mask dropped immediately! I bought my own place and no one is moving in with me! Ever.

[@user-kz7dh5tv7j]

Sex out side of marriage is sin.sin opens the doors to abuse ,and bad stuff happening to you.learn Gods ways for your protection. He trying to protect you. I learned it to late.😢 TRUST GOD

[@h.e9871]

Or when you get ill and/or are going through a rough time, such as the loss of a parent!

[@dahliafiend]

Cáncer snd lsing my parents were the events that led me to researching what was wrong with her and learning about narcissism. Think I googled “no empathy”.

[@h.e9871]

@@dahliafiend Yes! That's the words i googled too 😳😳✨️✨️

[@billindawatts5502]

Or losing you adult child to suicide....and it's all my fault ??????

[@h.e9871]

@@billindawatts5502 💗🙏💗

[@isobelle.London]

Once he moved me in the abuse began it was lightening speed

[@Eleniexp]

Yep the moment we bought a home and moved in together

[@stephanieschulze179]

You are so on the point. The engagement, the wedding(it was more about him & his buddies pulling pranks) horrible night & entire honeymoon which he invited his family to, when I told him I was pregnant --- he actually told me " maybe you aren't!" Yeah! Also more distant when he changed careers! I felt left behind & was only there to be his mother & take care of him. So wish I had left SOONER!!!

[@Elsie144k]

Looking back I see all of these. But back then it was so confusing. Was even explained away by our couples therapist. Warning ⛔️: stay away from therapists who are not WELL versed in narcissism. A life coach who has a-lot of personal experience and even better has healed from being one (like Ben here) is the best option.

[@XOChristianaNicole]

SO TRUE. Even trauma therapists aren’t all, necessarily, equipped to deal with people recovering from severe narcissistic abuse. It’s such a specific type of abuse, which, SO MANY people explain away. And all the little details One tries to give, makes ‘em look like nit-pickers and are the problem - because many of the issues seem to be so insignificant, when someone isn’t experiencing ‘em CONSTANTLY. I recently reconnected with my very best friend, from high school and a bit after - we were in separable for such a long time. Him and my mother always got along super well - he even went on vacation with us, one year. I mean, ALL of my friends adored my mother. No one ever understood that the reason why I always had people over, or the reason why I was always driving around and staying at their house - was because that was the only way to keep the wrath of my mother and step-father off of me. It was almost, like, a cat bringing a dead animal their owners. Like, “See, look what I brought you!” Because my mother loved feeling like the “cool mom,” and my former step-father liked the attention from young females (he would always at “She’s cute”’or not, and critique what they looked like. I was always so upset I was obese as in my youth (due to so much cortisol. I was later diagnosed with Cushing’s Syndrome), and he never found me sexually attractive. Last year, he liked a photo memory I shared, on FB (he was on my friend’s list, and is now blocked) - of a picture of my legs in a bathtub, and me missing my old apartment/bathroom. I had never felt that kind of repulsion, before. He still had many of my high school friends on his friend’s list. My BBF I reconnected with, knew nothing about what I have survived, this past decade - surviving Munchuasen’s by Proxy, while bedridden/housebound, at the hands of my “caretaker” mother. We were messaging a while back, and I mentioned something about my mother. He said, “You’re mother is just being stubborn.” I told him, with all due respect - he has absolutely ZERO clue the cruelty she is capable of. I have spent EVERY DAMNED DAY with her, for the past DECADE. He responded with “You’re right. I’m sorry. All I can do is sit here, listen and be present with you.” He’s the first person who’s known my mother for an extensive period of time, whom was willing to say something, such as that, to me. I was really afraid I wouldn’t be able to reconnect with him, in the manner I would like - and be fully honest about what I have survived, and who I have become, as result. And for someone with very limited capacity to feel fear, myself - that’s stating quite a bit. I am so thankful he is taking what I share at face-value, and isn’t questioning what I am saying. Especially because I don’t have a clear view of who I am, anymore - and can feel like I am not worth believing or listening to.

[@susanparker9877]

My ex husband and I moved to a remote location, far from my family and friends. The emotional belittling started within days. We had been married for about 5 years. The glimpses I had previously seen turned into blatant, covert narcissism.

[@daisydaffsforever723]

This is all so true and exactly what happened in my relationship. I just didnt notice until I reflected on my life with him. I have been with him over 30 years and before I would think he was 'just him' but didnt think then he was a narcisist...but now my eyes are open. I just feel sorry for him that he has to feel so superior.

[@Elsie144k]

Luckily you- wish I could get to the feeling sorry for him part

[@tishataray]

My ex narc dropped it after I went away abroad 4 a few weeks without him...he said I abandoned him and that I was now indebited to him....he made my vacay miserable

[@TrustintheLord860]

My covert left after we were together eight years, and got married… moving in triggered her, and she discarded me. She immediately rebounded. I had no idea she was a covert narcissist until months later. It is devastating. Often, I want to appeal to her heart and explain her wounds to her, but I know she would not listen.

[@manzanitaverde5455]

Yes, I would never have thought that someone that I spent years with would just stop talking to me one day out of the blue...it's taking me a long time to accept that this was his way of discarding me.

[@christianwininger77]

Mine was right after the “I love you”

[@jimparsons4312]

Mine too

[@MeCynthiaAnn]

SOOOOOOOO TRUE

[@brendadean9291]

My marriage went through all the 5 Pivotol moments that you mentioned in EXACTLY the same order. Unbelivable !!! It is comforting to know in the comments that other people went to similar mishaps.

[@pauladuncanadams1750]

"Hey sweetheart, I just looked at the calendar. It's been six weeks since our wedding and we haven't had sex once since our wedding night. That's weird!"

[@suzannelograsso3358]

Narcissist

[@passion8princess261]

Excellent video Ben. I only wish I had known this 30 years ago. I was married to him for 34 years and every 5 of these was spot on, only then I didn't know what I was dealing with, thanks for educating us.

[@RawMotivations]

You are welcome

[@dianerogers8791]

Same Here. married. wish i knew this over 30yrs ago . wish I knew what I was dealing with .

[@stephanieschulze179]

You & me both ! We deserved better.

[@RawMotivations]

Would love to help you on your healing journey. If I can be of help feel free to grab a time here at rawmotivations.com/one-on-ones

[@deb2319]

Really Good Talk Ben. TY 🙏💯🌱

[@RawMotivations]

My pleasure!

[@StandingInMyPower]

1.) My ex hated my children from my first marriage. 2.) 2nd pregnancy w/his he sought out prostitutes 3.) Pattern continues with his new GF. They spent 5 days together at his place and blew up at her because she was over stimulated. She is autistic. Mask came down. 4.) He is planning on moving in with new GF after only 4 months of dating in July. What I noticed is that the mask fell so much faster than in our 19 year relationship. I worry about that woman. Sounds selfish but better her than me. Save yourself. Keep safe.

[@michellestephenson9349]

It’s up to her to figure that out, you just worry about you! I have an obsessive desire to know if my ex is doing the same things to the new supply as he did to me. And how does she react? It’s so annoying

[@percystreet]

With hindsight…..on our wedding night, my new wife was more concerned with drinking in the bar with her friends….then on the wedding morning she insisted on us having breakfast with her parents and brother and sister-in-law……..weird

[@deb2319]

Yeah there is that stuff-part of it. And they abandon your family ..its just about their agenda.

[@valinc.6694]

Thank You

[@elmaswanepoel1598]

Spot on

[@heavenlyprecog23]

I experienced #4 and #5 unfortunately and now I’m dealing with a toxic coparent 🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️ but I woke up to that situation and am no longer attached to him. HIGHLY disrespectful son of a B!!! So glad I never moved in, got engaged or married ANY of the narcissistic men I’ve met in my life 😊😊😊

[@pauladuncanadams1750]

Yep.

[@doreendroste5318]

So true.

[@fightswithspirits915]

1) when I asked what her and her best male friend spoke about? (DEMON FACE) 2) reaction toward women who flirted with me (MURDER LURCH) 3) when i shook her kumbucha lmooooo (HATRED)

[@linnea3314]

Yes, right after the wedding.

[@user-kz7dh5tv7j]

He went to a bar while i am in hospital. In Labor😢

[@sevalsonmez96]

8. When they find a good job..

[@lha816]

How they treat you when you are poorly

[@RawMotivations]

We're here to support you on your healing journey. Take the first step by joining our free masterclass, where you'll learn how to break free from toxic relationships and much more. Just head over to www.rawmotivations.com/masterclass

[@KJxxoo]

Ok so I’m binging your videos to try and understand whether my partner is or is not a covert narcissist. And the part about the kids hit me.. not in regards to my partner, but his friend. I cut him off months ago because I just didn’t like him.. I found him rude and arrogant. But anyway, he used to tell my toddler stupid things like “don’t share your toys with your younger brother” (who I was pregnant with at the time) or making jokes about him bashing him up. The whole thing was sick. And he wanted us to make him and his wife guardians if anything ever happened to us. Um, no.

[@divinelyguided.111]

It all happened as soon as we got married!!! I thought we were good or was a total shock i hadn't an ideas !!! AND I WAS PREGNANT!! OH MY GOD!!! And Our second child!!!😢

[@sherriflemming3218]

7 Characteristics Of A Love Avoidant podcast ----Kenny Weis It's commonly mistaken for Narcissism The Benefits You Get From Picking Broken Men Kenny Weiss When An Emotionally Broken Man Is Using A Woman He'll Show These Signs Jonathan Aslay Your value comes from loving yourself not another person. Self love is a vaccine to emotional chaos.

[@margaretkyle7568]

Question: should I EVER talk to a member of the narcissists family who I was close with about what happened and how I feel? Are they truly all on THEIR side?

[@margaretkyle7568]

I kind of feel stupid for asking 😕

[@valinc.6694]

Yup i didn't meet the real him after 11 years until we got engaged.. Then i started to see him with out his mask .. He took me around other women he had a 3some with.. Arfued more .. Called me his mom who passed when he was 9 yrs old .. Stealing right out .. Stole my id and told me " it was none if my business " I wrote a book and mire to come .. Stsrted my KZbin channel.. Narssist Abuse & Recovery Academy..

[@babystagg5847]

#AHDEATH} Iz Ah #HUGE1 Al$o .!!!. 🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️. 😂🤣

[@user-dl6xi9eg9r]

TOO MUCH INTRO!!!

[@starburst2245]

You still haven't explained the 5 pivotal moments of when a narcissist mask fall off you're just jumping from topic to topic and talking about what happens when the narcissist Mass fall off, but you still haven't explained those five pivotal moments!!! 🤪🤪🤪🤪

[@RawMotivations]

I literally said number one number two did you not listen to the video?

[@RawMotivations]

If you missed it, number one was moving in together. The rest are inside the video. You just have to watch it.