The Best Way to Apologize to Someone You Hurt

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Күн бұрын

Apologizing is difficult for many people, but when you hurt someone, an apology is also healthy for you. The right way to apologize to someone you hurt is to simply say you're sorry. No "but...", no "it's just that...". Simply an honest apology.
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Пікірлер: 27

@robertgill2509 11 ай бұрын

Hi Stacy I just wanted to say thanks for this video it's been really helpful. I recently offended a neighbour of mine and I've felt really bad about it. I went through the same stages as you describe in the video (though fortunately not in front of my neighbour!) After reflecting on the situation Ive worked out what i did wrong, and I want to apologise to her and i want it to sound genuine. So i really appreciate your tips on here and my fingers are crossed that they will work and she will be willing to accept my apology.

@c2o2-42 2 жыл бұрын

I hurt my best friend out of anger and confusion, thanks for the video I hope my friend and I can still be friends

@myal5047 2 жыл бұрын

How did you apologize?

@c2o2-42 2 жыл бұрын

@@myal5047 I just talked with the guy about it, we both realized that the incident was a misunderstanding and we are friends again

@StacyRocklein Жыл бұрын

Sorry I'm just reading this! But that's awesome! 💙

@pukasmom 3 жыл бұрын

I need to figure out how to make things right with my Son . I made allot of mistakes raising him , I was 17 when I had him and lost My Beautiful Mother 4 months after I had my Baby and didn't know what to do. I Love him with all my heart. I was homeless and in abusive relationship for years that's why he stopped talking to me. I want to see my grandchildren and I want to be a Mother again & Grandmother for the first time. I have two beautiful Grandsons James was born on my birthday 7 years ago I've never got to meet him. It breaks my heart but because it makes me feel worthless and like there's something wedding with me like I'm not good enough to be included in there life, but I feel I can help them and I feel I have allot to offer him and his family. It's been so painful this separation and my younger Son and I are closer and we have been through though times together, H her doesn't judge me and he wants us all to be a family again. I don't like be judged by anyone much Lisa my own child but I am trying to get my Ego to be quiet so I can apologize for letting him down and not take it too personally If he's still into blaming me for things I had no Control over and let me take responsibility for my mistakes.

@johnrainsman6650 Жыл бұрын

A employee wrote me an apology letter--before a near-death experience. It was horrible. I’m a high-ranking chef at a university and I was told by a student employee that her coworker (let’s call him Terry) had been touching crew members too much. Not _that_ type of touch, just casual ones, like on arms or shoulders. He was always very outgoing and tactile at work. Still, I took him to my colleague’s office for a chat and told him he shouldn't touch anyone without consent. Just handshakes. I said we needed the workers to be comfortable in a good work environment, that he pretty much shouldn't talk about anything other than work and school. How he shouldn't tell his stories because they may be inappropriate to some degree to the other workers; funny to him only. I think he’s about 25, give or take. He seemed pretty quiet and uncomfortable during my speech. Answered a question or two with a nod and headshake. The only question he had for me was if anyone reported his touching; I said, "It doesn't matter." Maybe that was a bit rude. That day after work, I saw some woman injure him in specific ways I just can't write. Two men grabbed her in time to save Terry's life. As we all came to Terry's need and called an ambulance, Terry, in his weak state, told me he was sorry before closing his eyes. The paramedics found a letter addressed to me in his pocket. He wrote that he was so sorry for making his coworkers uncomfortable and that he never meant to. That he wouldn't have if he had known. That he wanted to make things right and redeem himself. He also explained that he had ASD and sometimes acted socially flawed, inappropriately jocular, and unfiltered. He said he felt so bad about that and that whenever he got the impression someone didn't like him, he would be quiet around them to avoid provoking them. He also wanted the person he discomforted to know he was sorry. This letter broke my heart, especially when Terry's heart almost ended. According to the news, the woman tried to kiII him because she hated his personality and jokes. She even told him people would be better off without him so that he knew he was getting what he "deserved." Thankfully he was treated in time. But...what if he wasn't? What if my last moment with him was in the office? I realized where I went wrong. Yeah, I was right about how his filter and touches were a little out of bounds, but come on; just because someone makes a mistake, doesn't mean you gotta reprimand them, especially when they're truly conscientious. I should _not_ have spoken to him the way I did. I should _not_ have said to his boss (who was in the room with us too), “is there anything you want to add?” That was insensitive. I should _not_ have restricted him to handshakes and work/school conversations only. All or nothing isn't fair. I should _not_ have taken him to the office for a formal lecture. He didn't deserve that. He probably felt like a criminal in an interrogation room. He only meant to fun with his coworkers. I should’ve been more patient and sensitive and only given him a very brief and gentle talk in the hall---just me. Besides, it's perfectly natural to causally touch or tap people *without* it being creepy; maybe Terry deserved a right like that, within reason and limits so he didn't go over them and discomfort anyone. I'm gonna tell him I'm sorry for being kinda tough on him. That I mishandled the situation and could've done better.

@StacyRocklein Жыл бұрын

Your self-awareness and ability to take personal responsibility is refreshing and so needed in this world. Thank you for being you.

@johnrainsman6650 Жыл бұрын

@@StacyRocklein well, I appreciate your appreciation, but I don’t really deserve that much credit. To be clear, I didn’t recognize when _I_ was wrong, before or during the office. I didn’t realize I was being kind of tough and totally restrictive. Again, I should’ve given him room for tactile and conversational compromise (casual touches on outgoing coworkers who don’t mind and appropriate conversations). I should’ve given him this rule somewhere besides the office, for only a couple minutes. I should’ve expressed sympathetic concern, not commanding firmness, so he could see where he was establishing a risk while understanding I wasn’t trying to scold him. And my colleague (his boss) didn’t need to be present at all. I’ve talked to her about how we went wrong ourselves, making something out to be a much bigger deal than it really was. She may have been quiet during the lecture, but she was wrong to let it happen in her office. And I was wrong to ask her if she wanted to add anything. Reprimanding someone can be too much, especially when you think they’re a good person Now, I’m not saying Terry didn’t do anything wrong (although maybe “wrong” is a bit of an unfair stretch under these circumstances). I’m saying he made a few mistakes , but not “immorally” per se. he’s a very conscientious guy; I should’ve thought about that before the office. Good people don’t need to be treated like bad people, you know? Do you understand what I’m saying?

@lee_basi 2 жыл бұрын

At dinner my grandma was there so she always laughed when someone used sarcasm with her so I decided to say something sarcastic, not meant to be hurtful and tried to make it for someone to laugh but she ended up crying and know I don’t know what to do 😓

@StacyRocklein Жыл бұрын

Well, it sounds like you didn't have bad intentions, so an apology should be enough. Maybe it was because your grandma wasn't expecting that from you. 💙

@dylandrews1114 3 жыл бұрын

In your opinion, if I said something in the heat of the moment that hurt someone else, should I give them space and wait to apologize correctly? And if so, how long would you think one should wait before apologizing.

@StacyRocklein Жыл бұрын

Hi Dylan, I hope you found the right timing. If it's someone you know, you already know when the right time is.