The Covenant Are Good Because... Diversity? | EFAP Highlight

[@yaboiportch]

"I may be witnessing the extermination of my own species by hostile aliens but at least I'm not a FASCIST." _-Space MobieBob, last words_

[@mrbigglezworth42]

A lot of modern game journos seem to think similarly with a more recent game about shooting space bugs and bots.

[@Shin_Mothra]

Space MovieBob is my favorite in the Bobverse! Right after Diabeto!

[@richter6699]

"Fascism is when mum makes me clean my room!" - Leftist Nerds

[@richter6699]

​@@mrbigglezworth42As well as a less recent movie where a democratically elected government uses a volunteer army to fight against a violent bug species who sent an asteroid to Earth after butchering Moromon colonists

[@pacmanrespector9552]

Western people literally think like this too lol

[@Hollyclown]

That’s like saying Caesar’s Legion was good because they subjugated their local tribes. Ave, true to Caesar.

[@ryatt9365]

Yeah the Covenant is diverse but the species are all enslaved and stripped of most of their unique culture, in one way or another. And the weaker the species, the more they’re taught and even bred to just be mindless pawns for the big guys like Elites and Prophets. Also the Covenant is about as faschist as it gets, I don’t know why he tried coming at the Spartans and UNSC for that. The Grunts displayed their distaste for being slaves and got their entire homeworld glassed, and then spent the rest of the war being used as bullet sponges.

[@barrybend7189]

​@@ryatt9365fans even get sad having to fight them because of the history.

[@dexter2392]

Caesar's Legion was good because they maintained order in a time of crime and lawless violence.

[@ryatt9365]

@@barrybend7189 Right. Fighting an army of enslaved children because the alternative is your own extinction. It’s a horrible situation. Just playing Halo 2 and maybe watching a couple terminals would’ve given any rational person enough insight into the Covenant’s culture to abandon this stupid argument. The series had a decade of lore and games at the time this video was made and he barely dipped his toes in it before forming a full opinion about on the political state of an entire fictional galaxy.🤦🏽‍♂️

[@barrybend7189]

@@ryatt9365 even the first book simply called the flood had entire segments dedicated to a Grunt.

[@Strawberrymilkdrink]

"I know these aliens are only fighting because they were conquered so its basically slavery but..." LMAO

[@zoeadkins9095]

"But they're better off! Look at how happy they are!"

[@bad-people6510]

"...But let's look at the macro, by which I mean hyper-focus only the things that support the bullshit I want to claim."

[@DALKurumiTokisaki]

@@zoeadkins9095 "Insert that one terminal entry about the grunts and the shot of a single tear going down the eye of an Ungoy witnessing the glassing of their planet"

[@dimas3829]

He sounds like Tau apologist.

[@johnjohnson9073]

​@@dimas3829 I mean at least the Tau's main goal isn't to glass humanity. It'd be slightly less ridiculous to defend them than it is to defend the Covenant

[@I3oo1ve]

Big guys and little guys All I can hear is, " They're in standard formation: little bastards up front, big ones in back... good luck, Cairo

[@HolyknightVader999]

Meaning that the big guys let the small guys soak up the bullets.

[@megaultradamn]

​@@HolyknightVader999that's the implication, yes

[@AWittySenpai]

"As soon as that door open let them have!"

[@Based_Witch_Hunter]

Check your targets, watch the crossfire.

[@SeymourTiddies]

Moviebob sounds like the kind of guy who would say the Thalmor are the good guys because Nords dislike foreigners.

[@zoeadkins9095]

And, just as he ignores the fact the Covenant single out a particular species for galactic-scale genocide (def' not an -ist there), he'd ignore the Thalmor being just as, if not more, bigoted as the Nords or any other race in-universe.

[@bad-people6510]

"But look how mean the Nords in Windhelm are to the Dunmer!" You don't know the Dunmer very well do you?

[@bluemutt9964]

​@@bad-people6510Remove N'Wah

[@elliedavies7138]

I mean, to be clear they don't "dislike foreigners" they're massively racist and don't even let certain races into certain cities lmao. The stormcloaks are definitely not the good guys in that game. Ulfric is uncomfortably close to Hitler in a lot of ways that were clearly done internally by Bethesda. (Not to say in practice hes as bad as Hitler tho obviously. Plus the thalmor are definitely worse).

[@LB-py9ig]

​​@@bad-people6510Dunmer, Nords, Altmer and Breton Reachmen remind me of the relationship between the Spanish, Moors, Aztecs and local tribes the Aztecs subjegated.There is nothing more realistic than a bunch of racists being racist to a bunch of racists who cite the plight of another race who is racist to both sides as an excuse to excuse being racist to the racists who force the racists to endure racism. The only people with a right to complain about it were performing human sacrifices on random people they kidnapped off the road. Everyone else who suffered from imperialism didn't hesitate to perform it when given the chance.

[@ManHamOrigins]

Roberto conveniently forgets the part where the rest of the Covenant declared a race war against the Elites in Halo 2

[@bad-people6510]

He also seems to have forgotten that he doesn't know jack shit about Starship Troopers.

[@enthiegavoir5955]

Well, the elites are a stand-in for Republicans clearly

[@genogamma13]

Short answer, he never played it and is smugly proud about it.

[@TheRoflcer]

Elites and Hunters (Mgalekgolo) if I'm not mistaken, at least I remember those two teamed up during the civil war.

[@PhillipOnTakos]

@@TheRoflcer Sections of Hunters and Grunts joined with the Elites during the civil war. Bungie kinda removed that aspect in Halo 3 so players wouldn't get confused, but yes.

[@bad-people6510]

Ah so Movie Bob is in the 'Never Read _Starship Troopers_ but Makes Extremely Assertive Claims Based on Things Made Up by Other People Who Also Lie about Having Read it' Club. There's a shocking number of people in that club.

[@LukasJampen]

I haven't read it either but I know the enemy is completely different from the movie.

[@bad-people6510]

@@LukasJampen It's also racially diverse, (the Main Character is Hispanic) hyper-liberal, and and extremely anti-militaristic. As they observed in this video you can leave the military any time you want. And it goes further than that, you don't even need to give notice. You can join the army, and then just not show up. If you go AWOL, they won't look for you. Military service is strictly on a voluntary basis, they have no draft and no recruitment programs under any circumstances by law. The military has 0 political influence, everyone is born with the same protections and the same rights, before the bug attack, the Terran Federation has never had a war with anyone. Their military, despite being assembled globally, is miniscule. That's why they use power armor, to supplement for the lack of manpower.

[@platypipope328]

​​@@bad-people6510Johnny is probably filipino, though it's only implied since he speaks tagalog. There is also the small detail that military service is not even the only way to earn the vote and the only reason it's focused on is because it's a war story about a soldier

[@bad-people6510]

@@platypipope328 Well, yeah I guess Juan is also a pretty common Filipino name. And that's right. "Federal Service" doesn't mean military service or even frankly, federal service. Or service of any kind. Ultimately it's about a guy who was coasting through life, decided he wanted to gain status, and eventually learned responsibility is more important.

[@phonepunk7888]

Like most leftists, he has strong and morally superior opinions on things he is entirely ignorant of.

[@michaelmoser7497]

MovieBob is a guy who you think is doing satire, but then you slowly realize he is this mentally brainwashed by his own politics that he’s 100% serious.

[@phonepunk7888]

He is just your standard New Englander with mainstream politics, who is under informed but has a huge ego and will let you know how much better he is than you. Seriously, the Northeast of America produces this type en masse.

[@wilder11]

I actually don't think Bobert is brainwashed. I think his politics are convenient costume for his hateful worldview.

[@WokeDEMOCRATShaveASPD]

@@phonepunk7888and they try to produce it. You think its failure was a spontaneous accident? No…..malice. They know so much of human behavior on an engineer level but look what they choose.

[@DonVigaDeFierro]

Poe's Law is a Harsh Mistress.

[@Skylancer727]

But you see, that's the crazy part. This came out 12 years ago in 2012. This wasn't at all as prevalent in political media as it is today. At most we had the popular "why aren't black people more common", but not this level of crazy. Hell we hadn't even really hit the peak of the neo feminist movement by the time this video was posted and that movement ate dirt around 2016 and is basically dead. I think this is more an example of how something like this went from total fringe batsh** insane to "if you don't agree with this you are a n***". But he was a journalist and we have seen how they were always on the fringe.

[@barrybend7189]

Wait so that means the Borg, Flood and Dominion are good as well........ What is that guy's problem.

[@janehrahan5116]

he won't say borg/dominon, tng federation is his utopia. The good side is the most diverse one.

[@barrybend7189]

​@@janehrahan5116oh but I used the Dominion as they are the closest analog to the Covenant. Flood and Borg are also in the same vein. See I'm using critical thinking unlike Bob.

[@Cyb3rHusky]

I mean, the Flood are *very* inclusive.

[@Mangaka-ml6xo]

@@Cyb3rHusky No race can be more diverse than the Flood ultimately.

[@TheAlmostGothic]

@@Mangaka-ml6xowhat about the necromorphs?

[@trygveplaustrum4634]

*Didn’t the Covenant commit genocide in Halo canon?* Actually, that makes sense for MovieBob’s support.

[@leakyboat224]

Most if not all of the Covenant species joined after wars were fought between the two. Humanity is the only species (that I know of) that they tried to outright exterminate. Some Elites found it odd that despite humanity putting up a valiant defense, the Hierarchs never offered them a chance to join the Covenant.

[@tevenpowell8023]

Well, their end goal is to turn on the Halos, ending all life in the Galaxy. So they're actually omnicidal, not just genocidal.

[@madspice1663]

they believed they would ascend to some kind of afterlife. Humans were originally written (before 343 took over) as descendants of forunners and able to activate their technology. humans mere existence is undermining the covenant religion. @@tevenpowell8023

[@TheDuck1234]

Basically humans are the descent of old the super race that build the halos and they worship them as gods, so to cover it up since it doesn’t fit with their faith they want to exterminate us.

[@Tallacus]

cannonically the human cost of the thirty year covie war was roughly 30 BILLION humans dead

[@darkraiking680]

“The dark and terrible force they’re about to unleash on the interwebs…” said the main character to the Moviebob or Nazi quote quiz.

[@joshuabuckle1216]

If this was a book, we could call it foreshadowing

[@deliverymanq7333]

Evil has a face, a name, and high cholesterol.

[@Señor-Donjusticia]

Yeah. The Covenant are very diverse. They systematically conquered and subjugated LOTS of species!

[@HolyknightVader999]

If the humans weren't Forerunner descendants who could threaten the Prophets' power base, that would've been their fate. Human soldiers, conscripted regularly from the population, sent up front to soak up enemy bullets while the Brutes and Elites wait out back and only join the battle once the enemy is weak enough or once they get bored enough.

[@ArgentWolf95]

it's the progressive stack working!

[@tristanbackup2536]

Not to mention genocide some single planet species prior that is implied in the lore.

[@def3ndr887]

And yet humanity came out on top

[@tristanbackup2536]

@@def3ndr887 Barely. The Covenant civil war did far more damage in a few weeks than the entire Human Covenant war.

[@darthbiscuit]

MovieBob (Roberto de Cinema) must of thought the world was ending when he saw the Helldivers 2 trailer

[@barrybend7189]

This is a man who gets winded on Twitter.

[@ThatEffinMonke]

"Roberto de Cinema" I like that name, I like that a lot. Thank you.

[@zeogold]

Of course he would, Helldivers 2 is two things that he hates; a Shooter and apolitical.

[@adamc117]

@@zeogoldIf you think Helldivers 2 is apolitical than man… The first thing you see every time you launch the game is a cutscene that features race mixing. Which is also funny, as the game depicts you as the bad guys. They got their messaging a little mixed there

[@ls200076]

​@@adamc117 Wait what? Wha- Man, you need some freedom. Report to your nearest Democracy Officer.

[@TheHylianJuggalo]

The screwed up thing is, when Halo was at its peak, these SAME PEOPLE were rooting against the covenant because "Lol look at how stupid blind religious faith makes you behave, m'lady" The people who were all in on that edgy atheist era loved halo because they thought the Great Journey was some allegory to Christian dogma. And now, 20 years later they go "Actually humans bad because human"

[@TheZamaron]

Bro people are always going to find something to complain about. LIke yes we get it, Humanity has many flaws, but thats why we have the phrase "only Human". Because we're so flawed.

[@LordFinai]

It's insane to think these are the same people, if you truly think that you need to leave your mother's basement

[@DonVigaDeFierro]

They have no principles. They would start worshipping the Mein Kraft book if it meant acting smug towards their imaginary ideological enemies. (See: Israel vs. Palestine)

[@UnknownName5050]

Surprised they never got it was Muslims like 100% lol. But yeah now they’re the puritanical side so it makes sense

[@blastingsound]

@@LordFinai actually, the "outrage" group tends to be the same group... they dont really even "like halo" like the guy in the vid said... they just use it as a tool for some stupid Outrage content. If you think the people that SEE this and point it out, all live in their mother's basement, you should touch grass.

[@Doc-Glock]

Halo: Combat Evolved Film Robert: Never Evolved

[@megaultradamn]

Cinema deus Robertus: Combo evolved (super sized)

[@zoeadkins9095]

"Your destruction is the will of the gods, and we are their instrument." - Big Guys & Little Guys, 2525

[@user-zy6mj2hd6m]

Big nazi and little nazi

[@ddaman7854]

Genocidal but mostly peaceful Covenant..

[@russianoverkill3715]

Peaceful rасist group

[@thatoneguy9666]

They only killed 26 billion people, they’re very docile

[@epicrotfl7017]

I love how Diabeto played the only two games in the series that show the covenant as just being out to wipe out all life in the galaxy that wasn’t them and somehow concluded they are the good guys because of diversity.

[@winlover37]

Gaming journalism folks

[@SylvanasWindrunnerResurrected]

Big guys AND little guys

[@Jack-uy7ie]

I thought the covenant wanted to "befriend" humanity. Only for the top prophets to find out their entire religion centered around a legacy left for humanity. So they kept it secret by declaring a holy war.

[@gagejohnathan9641]

That... Actually explains a lot Like how, even after essentially being radicalized to exterminate humanity, a majority of the covenant member races were able to live in peace (relatively) with humanity

[@devildolphin2102]

Yep Halo Contact Harvest. Many of the species Primarily the Elites wanted Humanity to join the Covenant. Truth, Mercy and Regret found out every Single Human being is a Forunner from mendicant bias. So to prevent the humans from taking their political power, they declared a war of extermination

[@visitingforgefather5997]

If I remembered correctly they wanted to negotiate with humanity since the planet they first encountered them on seemed like a treasure throve of Forerunner artifacts according to the tech they used to find these. Only for the Prophets to realize their tech was reacting to Humans, ergo saying Humans are Forerunners. Thus invalidating their whole religion and threatening the Prophets power, thus causing them to declare a war of extermination on Humanity for made up reasons.

[@misanthropicservitorofmars2116]

@@gagejohnathan9641there are lots of factions within the covenant. The brutes taking power through force is a display of that. The grunts also have contention with the other races of the covenant. Since the prophets declares breeding programs for grunts. They breed like rabbits so they’re sterilized. This has caused them to revolt in the past. I love the covenant because it shows that regardless of the unified vision. There are interest groups based on racial physiology. It’s interesting and fun. Also it being a zealous theocracy is hilarious to me.

[@nobleman9393]

This is correct.

[@swiftersunite]

The five minute “Halo Review” was one minute of a rambling intro, thirty seconds of backhanded criticism towards Halo, and then over three minutes of incoherent raving about racism in American society which inadvertently endorsed slavery, genocide, and also extreme levels of racism. Rags is right, how the hell did this guy not get fired?

[@PelemusMcSoy]

Didn't they eventually let him go post Gamergate?

[@looinrims]

This title gave me an aneurysm

[@EFAPHighlights]

You're welcome.

[@The90sDoggo]

"The only problem with space facism is that its not diverse enough, but fuck everything that even slighty reminds of the nazis!" -MovieBob least controversial take.

[@DonVigaDeFierro]

That's some Extra Chromosomes logic: "You must not kill the monster born to do evil! It's a poor thing that knows no better!! But the people who CHOSE to be evil? Yeah, kill them without remorse because they made a choice and can't change... Just make them DIVERSE okay? There's no reason why nazis can't be diverse!"

[@jurassicarkjordanisgreat1778]

the UNSC is already full of all different kinds of humans, same with super earth. Yet they want to call them right wing chuds when they say chuds are racist.

[@taylorlinyard3533]

I wonder how Bob would react to the part of Grunt history where they fully rebelled against the Covenant to the point the prophets had to completely nuke the Grunt homeworld, thus making the ONLY grunts left in the universe the ones that are forced to serve the Prophets with literal tears in their eyes. At least they got to stay on as part of a diverse company!

[@taylorlinyard3533]

Or what about the engineers from ODST, which the covenant STRAPPED BOMBS TO THE ENTIRE SPECIES FORCING THEM TO SERVE THE COVENANT OR FUCKING EXPLODE. Oh but at least they were diversity hires.

[@taylorlinyard3533]

From Bob’s perspective the Flood are the actual true heroes of Halo because their goal is to infect every single living thing in the galaxy thus creating the most diverse army of all time.

[@sharpie3811]

@@taylorlinyard3533Sounds like SBI

[@taylorlinyard3533]

@@sharpie3811 sorry old man here, what’s SBI?

[@sharpie3811]

@@taylorlinyard3533 Sweet Baby Inc, the new drama about it now.

[@Chapel85]

MovieBoB would be a traitor to the human race to an alien force.

[@Arrestedrabbit]

And what a super soldier he would be

[@Chapel85]

@@Arrestedrabbit now, now, we know that he would stand aside to let the wamen handle it

[@kingleech16]

He would probably be humanity's secret weapon, as he feeds the aliens all his batshit insane takes and complete lack of understanding of humanity.

[@Chapel85]

@@kingleech16 you're not wrong. We could make him our false double agent and he would never know

[@Tronathon242]

There's a reference to a traitor in Terminator: Resistance that gives Skynet info in return for underage girls. I instantly thought of Bob when I got to that part.

[@stev3548]

Moviebob once again falls for the midwit take of mistaking Fascism for Militarism, and then mistaking Militarism for just having a military.

[@DonVigaDeFierro]

"Everything I don't like is secret fascism" is a core part of their ideology. I'm not making it up. A Spanish leftist politician once claimed that "all violence is right-wing" and they can do no wrong because they are not "right-wing".

[@Skylancer727]

I mean most people conflate socialism with communism or communism with authoritarianism. In general people are just very poorly educated on governance yet think they understand because they can vote. Were it so easy...

[@HectorLopez0217]

People at The Escapist swore that MovieBob is a nice guy he just needs to get off twitter

[@CharlesUrban]

The Escapist is now out of business, basically due to its owners' poor judgement. That scans with their judgement of Diabeto.

[@Hollyclown]

He just needs to get off in general

[@KiloWhiskeyKilo]

They also brought him on in because they wanted someone who was apolitical... just let that sink in

[@deliverymanq7333]

X to doubt

[@bad-people6510]

@@Hollyclown He needs to get off his dining room chair.

[@S4ns]

Diabeto: "I mean, yes, the Covenant glassed dozens of worlds and subjugated or exterminated hundreds of civilizations in the of religious extremism BUT AT LEAST THEY'RE DIVERSE!"

[@MrTigracho]

Why he sounds like the defender of some sort extreme right, authoritarist government?

[@Skylancer727]

@@MrTigracho Sounds more like generally supporting authoritarianism. Left or right wing really doesn't matter. Right wing authoritarianism is something like Germany, Saudi Arabia, North Korea, or Italy while left wing is the USSR, Venezuela, or China. Honestly authoritarianism is just generally flawed no matter who supports it.

[@chaoticgoodcreations947]

Bob is actually the walking talking proof of the horseshoe theory.

[@SavageTactical]

I clicked this video not knowing who Movie Bob was and thinking I’d get an interesting take on HALO. Didn’t expect to hear the UNSC is basically the Space Nazis and the Covenant is the rainbow collation. This is what happens when we cut funding to insane asylums and release the occupants into the streets without regard.

[@genogamma13]

Former MovieBob fan here that's seen the rings of his tree from the very beginning to explain why the hell he thinks this way: Basically as a sort of a Batman villain origin story: he hates absolutely all FPS franchises with a burning hot passion to the point that he said other M was better than prime because it wasn't an FPS. And he basically equates the school bullies in highschool and frat jocks from '90s movies as the demographic for all FPS's. Ironically seeing Xbox fans as a dudebro chud force invading his hobby that we should have gatekept out. So he basically made this vid to tell people to shut up and stop telling him to try to like games other than his Chris-chan obsession with Mario by calling Halo fascist. Hell, he said a few years ago he even hates Metroidvania games, even Super Metroid and SotN for being "samey grimdark trash".

[@Arrestedrabbit]

Kino de Bobob misusing the word grimdark because he thinks it means gothic and dim visually is very on brand

[@theliato3809]

FPS games like X halo which were a major point in gaming history ruining gaming being a bad thing is a take. Its somewhat interesting in the curiosity of what western gaming would look like without halo and the x box.

[@kingleech16]

@@Arrestedrabbit Just let him keep thinking that. If he dipped into the more grimdarky bits of 40k it might just kill him.

[@MarcTheCyborg]

This is the best thing I’ve read on the internet today 😂

[@megaultradamn]

I used to have that mindset, where I refused to like something my bullies/ people I didn't care for liked. Then I became an adult. Ironically, those same dude bros that picked on him are probably better people now, whereas Boberto stews and pouts in his hatred, fermenting into something toxic and unsightly day by day.

[@somerando8615]

In the DOOM video games hell has imps, hellhounds, cyber demons, cocodemons, and a big ole brain spider. But Earth only has humans. Hell is more diverse and inclusive! Therefore......

[@zoeadkins9095]

Woah, woah, woah, my dude, "demon" is an offensive term. These days, we call them "mortally challenged", okay? Get educated 😇

[@TOONYBOY]

The people of Hell just want to bring Humanity into the fold and have us share in their lovely scenery!

[@genogamma13]

Occam's razor explanation about why Bob made this video: Basically the sourest of sour grapes in the video essay form to vindicate why he hates Halo and FPS's "It's not because I have weird psychological biases and wasn't good at the game, it's because the games are fascist dog whistles! I can't just have a bad opinion, I have to be right!!

[@RonS1018]

I feel like Bob would say the Flood are like America and the “melting pot”. A group of diverse people who have been stripped of their unique cultures and identity for the sake of one uniformed culture, or something like that.

[@EpicJasonX9000]

MovieBob still has the highest body count of EFAP members. The 1st victim, sadly, was Wolf. And then later JLongbone. His voice automatically gives people headaches.

[@S4ns]

Didn't he also take out Anna TSWG and Aydin Paladin?

[@EpicJasonX9000]

@@S4ns ah, good point! ^-^

[@imtheman84]

The Covenant are good because they have cool names and swords, not because they integrate other species that try to kill us.

[@tevenpowell8023]

The Covenant are good because they're purple, and the UNSC is bad because they're green.

[@TheUnoriginal2394]

@@tevenpowell8023Fringald will never recover.

[@Maggot-Milk]

that's like saying the flood isn't evil because at least they aren't picky with their food

[@zoeadkins9095]

But they're the ultimate incarnation of diversity! All-inclusive, including species we never could've met if the Flood didn't welcome them into their bosom.

[@TheSchultinator]

​@@zoeadkins9095 But is it true diversity if everyone they...welcome...is "vigorously encouraged" to conform with everyone else in the Flood?

[@DaMaster012]

So MovieBlob would like the Flood because they'll eat his Mountain Dew chicken?

[@DaMaster012]

@@zoeadkins9095 The Flood are the penultimate life form that's very existence is antithetical to individuality; collectivism taken to as logical an extreme as it can be taken, all biological mass existing only to serve a single tyrannical entity. The Flood is implacable, uber-infectious socialism in spore form... so of course Movie Bob would offer himself up to the first infection form he could find. If he was in the Dead Space universe, MovieBob would be a unitologist. In Warhammer 40,000, he'd offer himself to the Tyranids to start his own gene stealer cult. Movie Bob is evil. No ifs, ands, or buts: he's just as unrepentantly evil as he is incorrigibly, apex Dunning-Kruger effect stupid.

[@DonVigaDeFierro]

​@@zoeadkins9095Your comment increases my suspicions that Bob is a Great Unclean One that worships Nurgle.

[@larsgrotke2780]

Movie bob is unhinged. This is obvious, but it needs to be written down somewhere for when he eventually tries to commit some kind of terrible act

[@anthonysaylor8120]

Diabeto's videos are much like honey - regardless of whether they were sealed away for years, or they're served up fresh, they're virtually the same quality. Unlike honey, though, nobody fucking likes MovieBob. And he sure as hell isn't "sweet" by any conventional definition.

[@jajurvonhohenzollern5542]

i mean if something smells rotten its a kinda sweet smell. not a nice sweet mind you

[@italyspit5192]

Nobody likes him but somehow has a steady income from Patreon. That still confuses me to this day

[@kingleech16]

@@jajurvonhohenzollern5542 Yeah, "sickly-sweet" is a descriptor that should send people in the other direction ASAP.

[@the_absurd_hero]

I’m sure this has been brought up, but has no one informed MovieRobert that uniformity of training, skill, sense of duty, and vision are _necessary_ for military victory? That respecting and adhering to a chain of command in battle demonstrates not only discipline but also the willingness to put the success of the mission before your own petty thoughts/desires? He’s wildly and, dare I say, dangerously mischaracterizing all military protocol by suggesting that “uniformity” is fascist. I know we meme that MovieBob is an insane, inane, partisan hack of a critic, but this really is a whole new level of ignorance

[@tjjordan4207]

Ask Atriox if the Covenant are good. Or the Arbiter.

[@CrimsonArtsStudios]

OR Noble Team....oh wait you can't

[@tjjordan4207]

@@CrimsonArtsStudios 🤣 Or all of Reach

[@bad-people6510]

I wonder what Bob would think if someone told him that the protagonist and POV character from Starship Troopers from 1959 was Hispanic?

[@LB-py9ig]

Filipino Hispanic

[@MarcTheCyborg]

Juan Rico!

[@SallinKari]

You know... I'm starting to wonder if Bob heard that Mario might have been inspired by communism, with the red outfit and very much workers background, and the creators interest in communism before all the bad parts of it came out, and decided that if communism is good enough for Mario, it's good enough for him, and became a staunch communist provocator because of that thought.

[@giulizpaviz6381]

Not to mention that he's Italian, so he's also an anarchist (for clarification, that's obviously one of the racist stereotypes of italians, but Moviebob would probably say that)

[@Skylancer727]

Eh... I mean his argument more goes on militarism and authoritarianism. I wouldn't at all use that to decide if he supports a different economics system. Though to be fair capitalism won't really function if the automation really takes off in the next 30 years. Honestly not sure how the economy can function if more than 20% of people don't have jobs anymore and the jobs left are lower wages.

[@danielhuras617]

How does Moviebob just ignore the fact that the reason the Covenant are so diverse and visually distinct, is because this is a video game. we need multiple types of enemies to make combat interesting, but it also has to be readable. the player has to know what each enemy is at a glance so they can for a strategy in the heat of battle.

[@zoeadkins9095]

I would love to see the devs reaction to this hot take. Pretty blatantly accusing them of perpetuating racist, authoritarian ideals akin to the fucking KKK and skinheads for doing a 'hoomen v. aliens' story.

[@alecstewart2612]

Like how MovieBob has lasted past RoosterTeeth, the Escapist, Akira Toriyama, Kentaro Miura, and several gaming studios. "As time passes, the Film Roberto prevails" I suppose.

[@CplYakob]

I think he survives purely because he's too small (heh) to go unnoticed by the wider internet these days.

[@theliato3809]

he refuses to go down. Theres that other guy with the gambling problem who will beat him though.

[@alcatraz23atomicrenegade82]

So do cockroaches.

[@DM-mi4je]

Movie Bob will never change. Although Sargon brought up a good point that he hasn't transed himself yet so maybe he will outlast that movement too.

[@theliato3809]

@@DM-mi4je he’s trans alright. Trans fat

[@trygveplaustrum4634]

There are a large number of misunderstood, genuinely good “villain” factions. The Gaalsien, the Helghasts, and the Settlement Defense Front come to mind. The Covenant is not among that list.

[@isaiahsmith7123]

I wouldn't characterize the Helghast as good, only that they have legitimate gripes and had their homeland conquered, which since it happened so recently I think it's fair that they try to reclaim it. But yeah they aren't really good.

[@CplYakob]

I wouldn't count the Settlement Defense Front as "actually good", because one of my gripes with the otherwise surprisingly great Infinite Warfare is that the SDF are just evil bastards who live only to be evil bastards. Now the Helghast on the other hand, while extremely ruthless, do have a lot of legitimate grievances in the lore, which are overlooked because they look like space Nazis.

[@isaiahsmith7123]

@@CplYakob I mean they are also unapologetically fascist as well, but I think it was a case where in trying to make the bad guys really bad the storytellers unintentionally made the villains based 🤔

[@franzosisch5965]

@@isaiahsmith7123 And they had style. Can't forget that.

[@isaiahsmith7123]

@@franzosisch5965 Oh they definitely had style. They had enough drip to get a lot of guys to sign up to experience the sands of winter 😆

[@Beard_Hood]

Movie bob is the example I use to shoe how batshit this identity politics is. And how far back it goes.

[@mrdropkicker1]

Film Robert isn’t making a good case that “hardcore leftists aren’t just projecting with every criticism they make,” when he repeatedly calls people, movies, and games “fascist.”

[@maclainherbers6373]

The Law of Woke Projection

[@J.Jonah.Jameson.]

13:10 Bob clearly knows nothing about Starship troopers if he thinks they're a representation of facism lmao

[@DonVigaDeFierro]

He only watched the movie, where the most fascist they get is wearing Hugo Boss.

[@TM_AZ]

Like the director!

[@playmsbk]

I mean if woke extremists view theocratic slave empires as good, doesn't that prove horseshoe theory as correct? 😂

[@elliedavies7138]

Bob is kinda his own thing tho. No one claims him. His political takes are less left wing or right wing, and more brain damage.

[@reverbthevocal421]

@@elliedavies7138 His political beliefs exist on the mysterious third axis of the political spectrum.

[@jsmart6430]

23:36 Wait but like… the covenant don’t look like unwashed hoards their crap looks… way better then humans aesthetically speaking. (Don’t get me wrong I like my clunky human industrial look.) if anything Humanity looks the part of desperate grungy survivors.

[@bad-people6510]

Shut up! You're not supposed to notice the things that contradict his outlook! It's called "the macro."

[@coyoteone6197]

Something something exoticism.

[@ihavenomouthandimusttype9729]

The Escapist hiring Moviebob was the first sign they were never going to last. Yahtzee Croshaw was the only thing that kept them alive and now hes gone.

[@emberfist8347]

Even Yahtzee seemed to be drinking from the same kool-aid as Movie Bob.

[@jlev1028]

By his logic, the Spanish army must've been the good guys in their conquest of the Aztec Empire because they allied with all the Aztecs' enemies.

[@LB-py9ig]

I wouldn't be surprised if Cortez' army was more diverse than the indigenous one.

[@Soridan]

​@@LB-py9igCortez's army WAS largely the indigenous people.

[@bad-people6510]

@@Soridan It was MOSTLY the indigenous people. He took advantage of their long standing tribal conflicts. The Aztecs were the biggest dogs around and preyed on the smaller tribes. It wasn't hard to convince them to sign up.

[@ericchung3177]

Well, I mean…

[@theliato3809]

@@LB-py9ig Cortez rallied a coalition of people who despised the aztecs for the flower wars to his side to take over much of what is mexico

[@kbit08]

"The Covenant (from Halo) make the Planeteers look like the KKK - MovieBob" I really need this on a t-shirt

[@megaultradamn]

We must spread the dire word of diabeto.

[@t.j.8388]

This Bob guy sounds like what I imagine a Reddit Mod sounds like

[@NoobTamer]

That's an apt description of MovieBob. Unfortunately his internet presence far predates that cesspit.

[@scottwallace5239]

He also looks like one to a tee

[@NkGaming-1101]

Prophets: Lying power hungry psychopaths. Elites: Honor obsessed battle junkies. Hunters: A-holes to everyone except for the Elites. Drone: The Covenant threatened them into joining. Jackals: Greedy mercenaries and pirates. Grunts and Engineers: Literally enslaved by the Covenant. Brutes: The name alone is extremely fitting.

[@MarikHavair]

If I remember my brute lore the brutes were early spacefaring (basically like we are now) just long enough to bomb themselves back into the stone age and hadn't quite re-achieved that level when the covenant found them. I may be confusing them with the Krogan though, similar backstories I think.

[@bruhgod123]

Elites did try to fight the covenant before they even joined also Grunts didn't really have a choice considering the fact that their planet is almost a barren wasteland and the Engineers are biomechanical forerunner robots.

[@bruhgod123]

@@MarikHavair Brutes and Krogans pretty much have the exact same backstories.

[@sakkra93]

The Covenant to the Grunts: "Join us or die!" The Covenant to the Jackals: "Join us or die!" The Covenant to the Drones: "Join us or die!" The Covenant to the Hunters: "Join us or die!" The Covenant to the Engineers: "Join us or die!" The Covenant to the Brutes: "Eh, they're stupid, they're follow us regardless!" These are the "good guys" apparently...

[@optp2855]

The poor Grunts are literally forced diversity.

[@the0peratoR]

Is it bad that I don't watch efap anymore I just come here?

[@yanribeiro7108]

Nah, nothing wrong with it.

[@chaoticgoodcreations947]

Nah it's fine. We all appreciate the long but we can't all handle 6 hour streams. There was only one I completely sat through and that was the Boogie one just because it was so utterly hilarious.

[@charlesruteal9062]

You are on this council, but they will not grant you the rank of Long.

[@gaychampagnesocialist7213]

You must be flogged for such sins against the Longest Man.

[@trygveplaustrum4634]

*So Russia’s off the hook, then, I guess?*

[@cluelesslink16]

Oh no. He was always this way.

[@grandarkfang_1482]

Well, duh.

[@cluelesslink16]

I know, but in terms of his style dude hasn't changed at all. If you showed me this video and said it was made last week, I'd believe you.​@@grandarkfang_1482

[@devildolphin2102]

Always has been. Bang

[@johnochiltree1170]

Mauler: Roberto, all this time? Moviebob: always…

[@notribadsvault]

What’s funny is that the UNSC is all inclusive and has no signs of any sort of discrimination in it’s ranks, whereas not a single species in the covenant have anything more than a thin tolerance for each other.

[@fearlesswee5036]

Yeah, the UNSC is very diverse and was a bit ahead of the curve in that regard, whereas the Covenant are HEAVILY classist and species-ist, with extremely high tensions that reached a literal race-war breaking point in the second game. Diabeto clearly has no fucking idea what he's talking about lmao

[@viddykhaos2896]

What is most horrifying, is not that this video exists. It is not that he likely continues to have similar views. It is that people support him. There are enough people to provide some level of small or large income to him from these videos.

[@Spitifre8627]

Actually researching fascism in uni has been the best and worst thing I have ever done. Actually learning about it and being able to legitimately identify it has only shown me how little of it there actually is in the west. The bad part is now all I see everywhere is people like MovieBob who see anything military related and say "its fascist" or "semi-fascist" and think it makes them sound smart. It makes me want to cut my ears off and drink a can of WD-40

[@eddobh]

His take could be taken quite insulting, actually. It's like: "dumb gamers won't take notice of lore! all that matter is the imagery of an advanced militar force of super soldiers fighting a coalition of diverse species. Dumb gamers will see this as an exultation for fac1sm!" To be fair, dumb people will say something like that, but gamers are no that people here, Bob...

[@kingleech16]

To be fair, there are dumb gamers just like there are dumb people in just about any large group. I mean, I think Moviebob qualifies as a gamer, and he has the mental acuity of a compost pile.

[@emberfist8347]

Yeah he reminds me of Yahtzee and the people who claim Call of Duty is an American military propaganda series despite the history of showing negative elements to the US military and its history of shady activities along with the number of games where the main heroes are British.

[@blankadams3120]

Ah, no, I distinctly remember people pointing out that 'The process worked because his eyes turned blue' bullshit years back, I'm pretty sure everyone knew Bob was crazy almost immediately. Well, everyone that wasn't on his side...

[@L-Thatcher]

Blue is just Carters theme colour, it's not that deep.

[@blankadams3120]

@@L-Thatcher The curtains were fucking BLUE!

[@wojak-sensei6424]

I'm sure Roman legions were quite diverse as well. Just uh, I hope you're not picky on where that diversity came from.

[@Hello_All_My_N_Words]

When the German guy @metalcommander says "guys , we should have stopped this guy's years ago, I kinda feel at fault." Cinema Robert might need to chill..

[@dragonkingvahn]

The Necromorphs were the true good guys in Dead Space. Accepts anyone in their ranks. Makes everyone "diverse" in their shapes and forms. The black ones are better They all work for a common goal.

[@jackchipper7458]

How does he come up with such insane analyses

[@zoeadkins9095]

Crack is a Helluva drug.

[@bad-people6510]

By being insane.

[@Arch-Vile01]

​ if Roberto Película did crack he would be thinner

[@sauceboss9443]

Colleges have been owned by the Soviet Union for decades, and by extension, Israel has owned the education system since the 30s.

[@silastipton9982]

Lets hope that Moviebob doesn’t discover Helldivers 2

[@bruhgod123]

I mean Super Earth is the bad guy in the lore.

[@Paniksaw211]

@@bruhgod123yes helldiver it’s that one right there

[@bruhgod123]

@@Paniksaw211 In this show about alternate history about Super Earth being bad.

[@kimbob5]

“They’re just trying to not die!” That killed me.

[@Denien82]

Movie Bob is a genuine psycho. Please someone keep an eye on the guy, for humanity's sake...

[@DeltaFidelias]

I mean, Moviebob isn't exactly wrong about calling the Spartan's a "Fascist's wet dream." In lore, the UNSC is VERY flawed. We don't really know if they are explicitly fascist, but the Spartan II and Spartan III program make the CIA's MK-Ultra program look cozy in comparison. The Spartan's, in lore, are killing machines that were trained to hunt down and kill 'dissidents'. That doesn't mean that they aren't cool, or that Master Chief and the fellow Spartan's didn't turn around to become heroes, but their creation was based on morally wrong principles. And before anyone says anything, this isn't new lore, this is lore that came out between Halo's 2 and 3. Now, that doesn't mean the Covenant are the 'good guys'. Sometimes, when two factions are at war, the factions themselves aren't just good or bad. I'd argue that's the case in most war. And in the case of Halo, the Covenant are literally trying to murder ALL humans. It's not evil for the humans to try to defend themselves, just because they happen to lean closer to militarism. And it's not wrong to like characters because of their positive traits, while disliking their negatives. A good character should have flaws we don't like. Because nobody is perfect. Whew, sorry, went into a wall of text.

[@thegodofalldragons]

That didn't come out between 2 and 3, that was almost before the first game came out. It's in the "Fall of Reach" novel.

[@DeltaFidelias]

@@thegodofalldragons oh gotcha, fair enough. Though my point was that this isn’t 343’s bastardized lore, it’s been canon since the early on. There’s always been an underlying message of UNSC/ONI being militaristic and potentially fascist, with the Spartans representing that.

[@analt2379]

I’m pretty confident the UEG isn’t fascist, it’s a democracy and inner colonies enjoy very high quality of life, it’s also implied to be very capitalist, in Halo: the cole protocol it’s stated that a company owns an entire planet.

[@necrosteel5013]

Super humans are essentially the ideal any culture, perspective or ideology that believes in independent strength, virtue, honor, ingenuity and in general merit. Spartans are both people and are symbols. Spartans as people are very flawed indeed But Spartans as a symbol represent single minded devotion, Selflessness, Being true to the principles you pledge yourself to A life dedicated to Marital mastery, A life pledge to be the protectors of the people who cannot do so themselves.

[@elpolitemexa2272]

The government in halo isn't the UNSC, it's the UEG, which is a legit democracy thats kinda like what if the UN was the government for the world but allowing colonies to retain their autonomy, the thing is the UNSC was given full control during the war because they where at a time of crisis with literal worlds being glassed and humanity facing genocide. The UNSC itself is indeed flawed, but a lot of it has to do with ONI shineinigans; and the UEG is also flawed but it has to do more with the distribution of inner and outer colonies and not with militarism or authoritarism. Meanwhile the innies themselves aren't saints either, nuking entire worlds themselves and threatening humanity with the possibility of a galactic scale civil war that would have brought humanity to extinction according to Halsey.

[@mightquinnable]

He can't be wrong, even though there are facts and lore that say he is wrong. The fact that his definition of a skinhead and a fascist is someone not liking a diverse cast is wild. it's really really stupid

[@bahamut256]

24:05 The eye color changing was a rare NEGATIVE side effect of the spartan transformation process. The most common negative side effect of the spartan program was actually a loss of hair color, resulting in grey streaks in the hair or more rarely grey hair.

[@delivererofdarknessshoguno1133]

Grey supremacists

[@emberfist8347]

I thought the most negative side-effect was sterility.

[@shadowofdimentio4618]

Bonus points considering all the covenant are portrayed as basically all male with almost no female playing a prominent role, as well as only having standardised looks that make them all look the same. Meanwhile humanity has distinct races and sexes as main characters who play important roles But nah the convenant is more diverse and an attempt by humanity to dehumanise the enemy and not at all because the developers needed more distinct enemy types

[@tenebreh7363]

"Big guys, little guys, and EVERY color from the spectrum!" You guys just don't understand, admiring & arguing for moral superiority based on a faction's unique skin-colors is the key to defeating racism in gaming.

[@tristandpc]

I want to see his reaction to realising that the Covenant is an expansionist theocracy invading the homeland of a relatively small and weak race to reclaim "The Holy Land". Linking the Covenant invasion to the crusades is way, way easier than ignoring the racial slavery to call them diverse. With this metaphor, he basically called the Jewish peoples fascist for defending their home.

[@inferior3199]

Idk if that fully works since there are no space muslims that invaded the Earth before them

[@bad-people6510]

Do you seriously think Movie Bob would hesitate for a moment to side with the Palestinians against the Israelis?

[@tristandpc]

@@bad-people6510 I was more thinking of the Crusades, because of his documented hatred for Christians.

[@emberfist8347]

@@inferior3199 But there were the Forerunners which thanks to 343 had a war with humanity because of a lack of communication.

[@SuperfieldCrUn]

​@@bad-people6510 He's taking about Crusades-era Jews, not modern ones.

[@happygimly6061]

"I don't like that everyone's a badass" - Moviebob Man imagine missing the point because you just shot in the complete opposite fucking direction. The whole point of Reach is that humanity did everything right and they still lost. It was a hopeless cause. Humanity never stood a chance. The best we could do was throw a small glimmer of hope into the future at great cost. Even in mainline Halo with Master Chief you're always on the back foot. The Chief isn't special because he's a badass he's special because he's about the only person that can succeed in missions that slow the Covenant down even slightly and come back to do it again. Cortana outright says it. It's not that he's badass, it's that he's lucky because even with as badass as he is, the Covenant can afford to essentially just wage a war entirely against the Chief and then still have forces left over to wipe out humanity. The fact that it's so hopeless is what makes it feel so satisfying when you do against all odds manage to snake out a win. Yet, here you've got Moviebob out here asking, "where's Rob Schneider? I want some zany characters in my game about an alien race waging a genocidal war against humanity. Throw a pie or something." What a clown.

[@SpideyRules-pq6be]

I remember when this video came out and everybody roasted the crap out of Moviebob for his insane take. So many people were saying things along the lines of "I used to like Moviebob's videos until this one came out." This video was actually the first time I had heard of Moviebob because people were talking about how brain dead he was in it. I saw one of the response videos first and then looked up the actual video and saw how many dislikes there were. It was probably one of the first major dislike ratios I'd ever seen at that point. I'm kinda surprised you guys didn't know about it until now considering the other commentaries you've done of him. This is probably the first video that showed people what a complete moron he is.

[@-Azure.EXE-]

This mf has been cooking the most horrid takes for all most 15 years. 0 character development for that long is legitimately insane.

[@Tallacus]

LMAO... any real Halo fan who read Contact Harvest knows that the Covie genocide was started by the Prophet of Truth who didnt want humanity to take its place as the Inheritors of the Mantle. The Covenant was led by space Hitler.

[@TheRealHosty]

Boberto of house cinema never disappoints with steaming hot takes.

[@miltonfine947]

The worst misinterpretation of today vs the worst misinterpretation in history: "The Covenant are good because they're diverse." vs "Gimli wants Frodo to die."

[@me67galaxylife]

Damn he was already throwing "muh fascism" in 2012, rare

[@sakkra93]

"Eh, who cares if the Grunts are slaves and the entire Covenant tried to exterminate all Humans based on a *lie* spread by some Prophets who were scared of losing their power, they're diverse, and that's good enough for me!" - MovieBob, in a nutshell

[@bruhgod123]

I mean the Grunts had to choose between joining the Covenant or extinction.

[@sakkra93]

@@bruhgod123 Also goes for the Jackals as well, it's just the Prophets decided to pay them.

[@bruhgod123]

@@sakkra93 What was happening to the Jackals?

[@HellbirdIV]

What's always fun is, of course, that MovieBob approaches a real point and pivots off into the dumbest interpetation of it. See, the humans in Halo *are* actually quasi-fascist. A big part of the lore is that the UNSC is an authoritarian state where the imperial core worlds around Earth exploit and abuse the outer colonies to the point where various local civil wars have been ongoing for centuries. The UNSC has a prominent and very evil secret police in ONI, who we frequently work together with in the games, and the Spartans, Master Chief's generation especially, were created for the express purpose of being the fascist boot stomping down on the insurgents fighting for independence. ... And then the Covenant showed up and started turning human colonies into crystal balls because "Space Pope said so", and there's suddenly a significantly better use for the Spartans than using them as genetically engineered jackbooted thugs. If the Covenant weren't in the story, then yes, the UNSC would be the bad guys. But the Covenant *are* in the story. And so is The Flood. The UNSC is definitely 100% the good guys within that narrative - it's like the Soviet Union in the Second World War, it was a Communist dictatorship responsible for many atrocities... but the Nazis invaded them with the explicit intent of exterminating the bulk of its population, so there's no "both sides" to that fight, the Soviets were defending themselves, full stop.

[@Randomusername56782]

Tbf the UNSC isnt the main human government in halo, thats the UEG.

[@sakkra93]

That isn't even what Fascism is. Actual Fascism is basically Ultranationalist Socialism which rejects Marxism and the lie of "Class Conflict" and advocates for the unity of the social classes for a better future for the nation.

[@lokiswager]

So let me get this straight: the imperialist alien forces that are conquering and invading other planets are NOT fascism because they used big and little alien slaves as part of their armies? Is that seriously his opinion?

[@Hoganply]

FilmRobert: The Marines' eyes turned blue! fAssHHisT sYbOLysM!' Me: Yes, and having them turn red, yellow, or green would be far more subtle, hm bob?

[@DrachonaTheWolf]

This is where it really would've helped for Cinema Robert to at least check the plot for Halo 2 and 3, where an entire faction of the Covenant turns against everyone else after discovering that the "Great Journey" will kill everyone.

[@electricbayonet2]

Oh no, _this_ video. I thought a decade of distance was distorting my memory of just how awful a take this was but...no. It’s just _that_ _timelessly_ _awful._

[@draakgast]

people like moviebob are the reason I don't feel like I'm going crazy, they work really well as reference

[@sugartoothYT]

A man this insane built an audience???

[@qliphalpuzzle5453]

Oh yes very progressive with the eugenics committed upon the Grunts

[@ShadowWolfRising]

He completely ignores the Swords of Sangheli that Ally with humanity before the Trilogy Ends, and afterwards bring in some of the other species into said organization, a good chunk of them being Grunts/Unggoy who are now treated better which in turn means those are allies of Humanity as well.

[@BSMerlin064]

Clearly 343 took this to heart for the T.V. show.

[@boulderthebolder6165]

Lmao, wait til this guy finds out about the grunt rebellion and hierarchy of the covenant.

[@0Defensor0]

Oh, I remember that interpreter scene from Reach! The American voice actor was doing his best Russian accent while failing to speak Hungarian. It was painful.

[@thetrocch365]

No one is asking the important question. How the hell did no one see this for 12 years?

[@CrusadiaIX]

No fucking way they’re covering this core memory of mine