I'm also a husband of 11 years and 55. I have tried everything to be loved, supported and shown just a little respect. I have never felt so alone.
@ooshie10002 жыл бұрын
Same.
@Chris0123456712 жыл бұрын
Right there with both of you.
@oambitiousone7100 Жыл бұрын
Didn’t know what to ask for and didn’t want to HAVE to ask for it. Wanted it to be organic. Amen.
@becurly87843 жыл бұрын
I like the idea that we should not settle for how it is, but to seek change to make it better
@larryrichins78873 жыл бұрын
The disconnect goes both ways I've been married for almost 40 years It's been a long hard road. What I didn't know is my wife was molested as a young child by her stepfather and has never had professional help. That explains a lot right there.
@louisademetrio44083 жыл бұрын
The Little Things Over Time Add Up! When Anger and Rage takes over you know you've had enough. When you don't recognise yourself! You drift further Apart!
@maribelmejia42944 жыл бұрын
This is exactly how I have been feeling for 20 years in my marriage
@gabitom50564 жыл бұрын
Have you done anything about it yet
@michaelsalas78373 жыл бұрын
@@sharonpopecoach hello Can I use the tools from Sharon’s website as man with similar issues ? Thank you very much
@michaelsalas78373 жыл бұрын
@@sharonpopecoach thank you so much for replying to my message / question Have a bless day
@michaelsalas78373 жыл бұрын
@@gabitom5056 hello I have been attend therapy which I like going but on my own I have been going well now by zoom since Jan It has help me with clarity in many areas, tools to work on and I do not want to carry anything into another relationship if god allows . I have learned a lot. But the idea of going on my own is for me however how does that help a relationship improve.
@bbmoy19833 жыл бұрын
Me too, but it’s hard when you try to make your husband see how disconnected we are and he sees nothing, like everything is normal.
@eve1258514 жыл бұрын
After 10 years if being together, i feel totally alone. He is only physically present, even for our kids. I gave a thousand chance for him to make it up, but being an indifferent father i cannot forgive to him. Our marriage is disconnected for years now, because i have always been alone. Thinking all the way back, i have always been going everywhere alone with our first child. He doesn't spend time.with me, not even watch a movie. I even fight on my own. The.past 2 weeks i threw his clothes at the front door twice to get the hell out and he doesn't go. I cannot live like this anymore. I feel like he doesn't give a f**** for us. He works, returns takes a bath eats and dissapears into the bedroom.with his cell phone. This is his routine. Like a visitor in our house. I never pictured my life like this. On the other hand he says he loves me but does nothing to prove it. This time i am on the brink of the divorce and i feel it, cause i am fine when he isn't home but when i see him , i feel depressed and miserable.
@jenamaza38344 жыл бұрын
eve125851 exactly the same story here
@lainaentzminger99034 жыл бұрын
Same story, but thirty four years of marriage. Always felt something wasn’t right. Found porn on his phone a couple of years ago, then AGAIN last year both times were totally accidental. He was to stupid to hide it and it came right up. The second time was looking for directions on the way to my daughters graduation of her masters degree. Had to act like nothing was wrong those two days and still after a year, he has done absolutely nothing to prove his love or that I will ever be a priority, much less his number one priority. I have Always proved he is my number one priority and I have never looked at another man in ALL the years we’ve been together. It’s heartbreaking and I find it hard to have the will to go on every day. I care for my mother who has Alzheimer’s and if it weren’t for her, I would end my life. I am totally committed to him. I’ll never understand how he can be the person I am understanding that he really is. I have no income. I’m disabled and gave up a wonderful home and job for him that I and my grandparents have much money to attain. The house we live in is not good. Bad air quality, foundation problems that are just awful and it’s not even in our name. It’s his dads. The house he grew up in. His dad wanted to “trade” houses eleven years ago, and we gave up what we had put heart and soul into for fourteen years. I waited eight years to have children with him and he has destroyed me. For nothing!
@gabbyrodriguez56434 жыл бұрын
eve125851 I have been in the same situation for almost 10 years and this is making me crazy. I can’t handle this marriage on my own anymore. 😒
@DeaconChriss3 жыл бұрын
He's working putting food on the table. If he didn't love you, he wouldn't work hard for his family.
@swaroopas4583 жыл бұрын
Same here. Physically present, buys stuffs for home, me kids. But don't come n talk about problems. If I start talking, he will talk as if nothing happened..anything taken as criticisms, all imagined in his head that I'm there to get him always..wt to talk with this kinda husband..I sleep alone, kids think I'm the bad one coz I want to talk loudly to let him know I'm hurt..he doesn't recognize that he has hurt me emotionally ,verbally..I'm going to psychotherapist ..she asked to bring him..he accepted to come.. let me see wt happens nxt
@RyanEstep58774 жыл бұрын
Reverse the roles, my wife is the one disconnected.
4 жыл бұрын
you're not alone.
@johnsparks34133 жыл бұрын
I'm in the same boat my fellow man
@brendanperrett82483 жыл бұрын
I was there too for the past 10 months. Things weren’t like they were in the past. I got to the stage where I had to go something that was right for me. I tried to get her to make it work but she never bothered to try. I finally found out she was having an affair. I confronted her and she denied. It all added up as to why she didn’t want to try. I told her I was going for separation and all she could say is she didn’t want to divorce. Well sorry there I told her,I gave you time and you gave me nothing in return
@EnemyAce883 жыл бұрын
Same. Can't get her to look away from her phone for more than 5 minutes.
@pixamite13 жыл бұрын
What about the man who has been in a marriage for many years that has been in a disconnected status? It looks great on the outside, but there is a sad void on the inside.
@alexvidu45173 жыл бұрын
Thanks for the Video clip! Sorry for the intrusion, I would love your opinion. Have you thought about - Millawdon Varied Nights Trick (erm, check it on google should be there)? It is a good one off product for learning intimate questions to make your relationship stronger without the headache. Ive heard some extraordinary things about it and my mate at very last got cool results with it.
@ashtonleroy90233 жыл бұрын
You prolly dont care at all but does any of you know a tool to log back into an instagram account? I stupidly lost my account password. I would appreciate any help you can offer me.
@mohamedayaan78023 жыл бұрын
@Ashton Leroy instablaster =)
@ashtonleroy90233 жыл бұрын
@Mohamed Ayaan Thanks so much for your reply. I got to the site thru google and Im trying it out atm. Seems to take quite some time so I will reply here later when my account password hopefully is recovered.
@ashtonleroy90233 жыл бұрын
@Mohamed Ayaan it worked and I finally got access to my account again. I am so happy! Thank you so much you saved my account!
@pitchkapizda8355 Жыл бұрын
When this happens there’s no changing it it’s over
@markclapper60152 жыл бұрын
I'm a man i feel the same way.
@moonbeaches4 жыл бұрын
Mandated 😧 The best moments... are those where tenderness springs from the soul!!!... in simple places that gives you nature and God!!!💕
@rondadepenbusch8152 Жыл бұрын
Nailed it .26 years . I filed for a divorce 5 weeks ago. He didn’t try . Anything . That’s exactly what happened, we had a disconnect and couldn’t reconnect?? I don’t know if that’s the best way to explain it, but for me it is. EVERYTHING you’re saying is exactly what I’m feeling.
@anniegardner55744 жыл бұрын
That's me as well. So sad, we are millions in this situation...
@ekimnamtrah75834 жыл бұрын
Sharon your video disconnected marriage, is from the woman POV only. Women are not always the victim or the one suffering. My wife feels more like a roommate she is so disconnected.
@tyrinp68824 жыл бұрын
Not only women....I’m in this same situation
@roger96363 жыл бұрын
I can honestly tell you it's not only women who feel like this. I'm a 50 year old man who's been in a 27 year marriage and I feel those same feelings as the lady who wrote you. What do I do?
@roger96363 жыл бұрын
@@sharonpopecoach thank you for the info I've got an appointment scheduled thanks again
@newenglandtrucker60493 жыл бұрын
I know your speaking to woman. But this happens to men too!!!
@melkerner10 ай бұрын
I worked too much and distanced due to the chaos of the household. Wife disconnected and cut off all physical touch / intimacy, resulting in frustration and anger at being replaced by the dogs, kids and cell phone. Working hard to reconcile, but no kissing, physical touch or sex for years and years has taken its toll - not a very good chance of recovery at this point
@isiahwashington29992 жыл бұрын
After one night in this relationship I know it is over.
@Dream-bebe3 жыл бұрын
This happened to me as well 22 years marriage!
@MaxZagar10 ай бұрын
Wife is working always late, always out, always out on some theatre... I think its better to just check out. I do not even care if there is a divorce or not.
@SchibbiSchibbi4 жыл бұрын
so true, it's the little things... that sum up.
@rachelfarr62783 жыл бұрын
I have read your book, watched your videos and I am still at a loss. I feel like I'm alone even when I with my husband. I don't feel like he accepts me, I don't feel appreciated, or valued. I am just lost
@Maria-fz1mu5 жыл бұрын
This is me...is horrible. I don't how to get out or stay in.
@mugishachance88444 жыл бұрын
This is horrible 😭 I don't know how to stay as well or leave he closed all the doors 😡 IAM in his prison for the life , he always said if I leave he will take my kids and he gonna lie in every way possible to keep my kids.
@lainaentzminger99034 жыл бұрын
I don’t either Mary M. I have been in this limbo for years.
@lainaentzminger99034 жыл бұрын
Mary M so sorry to you. I can’t believe there’s someone who gets this !! Much love to you.
@michaelsalas78373 жыл бұрын
@@sharonpopecoach I also need clarity and strength to make the correct decision and not be paralyzed in my steps. It’s been too long and need closure to this chapter so I can start a new chapter thank you Michael
@Dream-bebe3 жыл бұрын
I just have to accept things and find a way to move on with a new reality. It is not easy after so many years of hoping and wishing for 22 years! The only thing I can say is I am still alive and I will move on !
@louisademetrio44083 жыл бұрын
@Michael Salas - Physically & Emotionally Exhausting! I stopped trying a long time ago but he still doesn't get it! He Won't Leave nor does he make an effort to Change. This Is Surreal! So Tiring.
@gordpite14333 жыл бұрын
What if it is the woman who has shut down and blames the man for the disconnect????????
@larryreynolds51364 жыл бұрын
Sharon I realize most of your guidance seems to be unisex, however, in the near future I would really appreciate if you could do something specifically for us men because our lens or perception is different from the females in certain formats because of the roles we identify as and our responsibilities in our marriages also. Thank you in advance.
@nursemaggie23213 жыл бұрын
Yes. I refuse to ask for it....you're so on point
@1949coupe3 жыл бұрын
Great talk, but I don't find it odd that a lot of the comments come from men. Its a two way street. Life happens, but sometimes you make the wrong choices that affect a relationship. I've been married for over 20 years. When we decided to have kids, we made a decision that she would stay home to raise the kids and I would work more. So 15 years later, I work two jobs, 6 day as a week which limits my time with the family. We haven't slept in the same bed for decade because one of the kids was scared to be alone at night. The combination has been detrimental to our relationship and my relationship with the kids. One of the worst decisions we could have made. I'm still affectionate, flirtatious and push for some time together, but its one way. I need more of a physical connection that to get laid occasionally while hoping not to be interrupted by the kids or an hour where we just talk without being interrupted or feeling she is dying to check her phone. I miss just waking up on a Sunday morning and spending some time in each others arms. Yes kids are important, but so is your spouse.... I'll keep trying, but I'm getting tired of waiting.
@ABar833763 жыл бұрын
It’s hard when you have little ones. I totally get this because ours try to be in our room every night.
@jaydixson17312 жыл бұрын
I like what you are saying
@kennybranshaw75264 жыл бұрын
My wife seems at home with disconnection.
@gorgeouswales96354 жыл бұрын
Thanks, my first time here😊
@alexwill57834 жыл бұрын
Good video
@michaelsalas78375 жыл бұрын
Is there disconnected marriage videos for men?
@michaelsalas78375 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much Sharon for your reply. I will listen to your videos.
@michaelsalas78375 жыл бұрын
It’s hard to find videos for men going through what ladies(woman) are going through which can be somewhat similar. I hope and pray to help other men some day! God bless you
@michaelsalas78375 жыл бұрын
The difficulty is coming to a conclusion especially trying to work on a marriage by myself if feels, continue to work on me in the last 7yrs following being a victim of infidelity and praying things would get better. Also being a good man, father and worker outside and in my home. It’s just tough when there is a disconnect! Thank you
@louisademetrio44084 жыл бұрын
Hello! Exactly how I Feel! I Want Out! I want Distance! He is fine carrying on with the same awful Routine that "Kills"!!!
@michaelsalas78373 жыл бұрын
@@louisademetrio4408 I m sorry your going thru the issues I know that feeling it’s horrible
@inserter4004 жыл бұрын
HOW DO YOU SAVE A MARRIAGE WHEN YOUR WIFE SAYS SHE IS DONE AND IS GOING THROUGH A MIDLIFE CRISIS. DO YOU HANG IN THERE BECAUSE YOU LOVE AND CARE ABOUT THIS PERSON, DO YOU WAIT IT OUT UNTIL THE CRISIS HAS PAST ? HOW DO YOU KNOW WHEN THEY ARE OUT OF MIDLIFE CRISIS ?
@tquick6484 жыл бұрын
That's a damned good question. I'm going through the same thing, nearly 20 years of marriage and all of the sudden, party, party, and I'm holding her back because I'm apparently the responsible adult that has to go to work and provide for our family seeing how she has no job and now sleeps until noon every day.
@geertkoops1 Жыл бұрын
Doesn’t this happen to man ? I reached a level that I turned in the person that brings the money to pay the bills, Salaries of , gardener , pool man , maid 8 hours a day for cleaning, cooking etc. love has to come from both sides and I don’t mean sex ! Hugs and text messages , the last not after 12 hours. Spending her time 50 percent on the phone or do whatever she likes. Just a comment from the male side
@sharonpopecoach Жыл бұрын
This absolutely applies to men as well! My primary audience is women, so I generally use examples and speak from that point of view. However, the tools and teachings are gender neutral and definitely can be used and applied by men.
@toughharley19034 жыл бұрын
I am the one that feels disconnected. I have two preteens and one two year old that I really didn't think I was ever going to have, my job is hostile and not happy, then I have a husband who is needy like a 5year old, so basically I have 4 kids when all I ever wanted was 2. I need space, he use to work but now he has to watch our two yr old while I work and carry everyone on my back...
@sunflowerhk1004 жыл бұрын
Hi Sharon, do you think that the disconnection problem can be solved by just one person working on it? especially because that the other person is not capable (eg. not sensitive enough to be aware of problems that need to be worked on).... also, could you please post the link to your Disconnected Marriage Facebook group? I cannot find it.
@ir58794 жыл бұрын
I could not find the group in Facebook. Could you please add the link?
@shamdesilva91373 жыл бұрын
I'm 32 and this is the way my marriage is going on right now and in last three years from the wedding. What should I do?
@humanityrising93783 жыл бұрын
Get out
@ash66clarke3 жыл бұрын
Get out now it never changes .
@ash66clarke3 жыл бұрын
Get out as soon as posible it never changes .
@shamdesilva91372 жыл бұрын
I moved away from him in last April. Now I'm in a divorce process.
@shamdesilva91372 жыл бұрын
@bilki Ahmad I don't have love for him anymore
@magdalenahorczak-brown29244 жыл бұрын
I would like to get an access to the group you have mentioned in this video :) but it seems only be Facebook Page here :)
@yourcaseworker69163 жыл бұрын
Marriage is an outdated concept SHEEPLE... We were all sold a bill of goods as children... The house (mortgage)...The white picket fence...2.5 kids. Society is instant gratification based now... The days of the man being the bread winner and the woman being the mother and home maker are long gone... That was the reason for marriage to begin with...find your life partner...raise a family. Now you have too many distractions...cell phones... facebook... instant connections to old boyfriends/girlfriends... And it's all discreet... *NAILS IN THE COFFIN* Marriage... *DOOMED BEFORE IT EVEN BEGINS...* Half of all marriages end in divorce... Yeah right... They all end...Some just stay.
@katrina29312 жыл бұрын
How do you bridge the gulf that develops?
@rickmckillip73823 жыл бұрын
Turn it around this could be a man you were talking about instead of a woman it happens both ways