The Drinker Fixes... Alien: Romulus

[@TheCriticalDrinker]

Get your Critical Drinker and Critical Doggo plush toys before they're gone! www.makeship.com/products/the-critical-drinker-2-0-plushie

[@photoluminescent4624]

Is this, cough cough, Ya Boi Zack bait? I would like them to incorporate the idea of finding and saving a person in the cryo-pods, only for the person to be in absolute terror upon being awoken due to contamination.

[@Autobotmatt428]

Now do Alien 3 in order to fix this franchis.

[@TyeDPod]

It would never happen because they wouldn't let a "PoC" be the bad guy.

[@sebcreed9835]

Any plans on doing a ''The Substance'' review? I'd love to hear your thoughts on it!

[@marilynr7469]

Side note: drinker, have you watched Silo an Apple Original. I would love your opinion on the series! I’ve enjoyed it

[@RevanR]

This is what most critics often forget to do : Constructive suggestions

[@CMCAdvanced]

I wouldn't assume most critics were capable

[@frankthecat1660]

RLM does it all the time.

[@BarrySlisk]

We are not prof. writers.

[@SanDukey]

@@CMCAdvanced every actual critic is capable. Sadly, very few people fit that description these days.

[@Fotoschiki]

@@SanDukey Yeah, most "critics" are just message checklist bots

[@sonia_kl99]

I can't lie to you about your chances Drinker.. but you have my sympathy

[@Clockworkorangecassidy]

What, you put him in charge?! Oh man...

[@freebretth]

🤣🤣🤣

[@paineoftheworld]

The Drinker was always a bit twitchy.

[@brentogara]

The perfect script Doctor. His narrative perfection is matched only by his capacity for drink.

[@Markus_Andrew]

With a little luck, the network will pick him up.

[@holmboy]

They should've replaced the "get away from her" callback with: "Did you hear about the xenomorph in the elevator shaft?" *Pulse rifle burst* "It's going down!"

[@invisiblerevolution]

😂

[@wishpunk9188]

Best comment

[@dylanmonstrum1538]

Aw man, that would have been really good

[@kaiju115]

Alien: Isolation was the true sequel to Alien & Aliens.

[@nerdoutreachprogram5358]

Fucking amen.

[@jimmiekarlsson4458]

Word

[@vincentthemasterofshadows5743]

And after ten years, the studio confirmed there's a sequel under development.

[@DragonHeart613]

Isolation AND Romulus.

[@CharaGonzalez-lt7yw]

Truth

[@liamphibia]

The Drinker fixes series has RETURNED!

[@Furiafelina]

Yay!!!!!

[@archstanton9073]

Now bring back Production HELL!

[@daveellis3048]

Somehow the Drinker Fixes series has returned

[@liamphibia]

@@daveellis3048 Heh.

[@lucymiau5700]

And this might be a great start for fixing some more damaged stories as it seems that there are huge pile of halfrotten Movies that could need some help to finally shine. Joker 2 for example. Ok, this Movie is more than halfrotten but I think that there is a chance to make the Arthur Joker great again.

[@LogosFlow]

Yes, Ellen Ripley, IQs dropped precipitously while you were away.

[@masterofpuppets5568]

Glad to finally have another 'Drinker fixes'. Glad to see a drunk in Scotland can still do a better job than Hollywood writers.

[@993mike]

While this is definitely not a perfect solution, it is WAY better than the movie we got which was awful. Go Drinker!

[@alexandrugabriel3839]

Well it's easy to fix something that is already done from 0,by taking out the mistakes you notice. Same was with Justice League vs Zack's Justice League...Zack's was better because first was a disaster...but what if Zack's was the first? One is to edit and fix an idea and other is to come with one from 0. Drinker did good but makes me wonder if he has the helm to write an entire plot/script(story) for a new Terminator movie or Matrix movie,from scratch,how that will turn out. Again once the design of a thing is out,is easy to redesign by eliminating flaws rather then re-create or create a new.

[@sarah42e]

You sure about that? go read his mid books and see if you keep the same opinion.

[@reyne2077]

@@alexandrugabriel3839 while I agree that making something from scratch is difficult, and I think Drinker would agree as well, but... If its so easy to fix already completed script, WHY COULDN'T THE AUTHORS DO THAT?

[@alexandrugabriel3839]

@reyne2077 Because they don't do Screenings for more people,before release. I know for a fact that when a movie is done it gets shown to some people,thus we got term "reshoot" but only when a LARGE audience see that project the results can be more accurate. A Game can work perfectly in a development studio but when launched is a broken mess. Why,well because a Studio has a pre-set config builds,but PC gamers has multiple combinations of configurations. Same goes for Movies,Actors and some of producers see the final movie at premiere,after post production team did finished the editing and all. A solution is when a movie is ready to premiere ,instead Global screenings,why not shown only in selected Cinemas for reviews and if those reviews have a 70% ratio in favour,get it Global,if is bellow it needs reshoots...but i guess you know why they don't do it like this,it costs.

[@wakeupuk3860]

Ripley sums it up very well, "Did people's IQ drop so low, while I was away". Will we ever again see films with creativity, great story line, very good acting and the ability to scare you as ALIEN did back in 1979 - sadly, somehow I don't think so?

[@AtlanticPicture]

That would first require writers with real imagination, and those are nearly extinct. Most decent actors are middle-aged now, too. At the very least, we’d need directors who understand, respect, and stay true to the source materials. Villeneuve has potential and he could have done a better job w this too probably, but he's pretty busy lately..

[@rodneybrocke]

They don't take pride in movies as an art form anymore. Now days, movies are "manufactured" to make a quick buck. And it shows in the finished product---cheap, mass produced junk.

[@marcocymro5031]

*”Did IQs just drop sharply while I was away?”

[@corrupt1user]

The Xenomorph has a grand total of 4 minutes of screentime in Alien, and doesn't even show up at all until halfway through. Sooner I suppose, if you count the facehugger. Sometimes you need to spend time building up the characters and letting the audience know there is an entire world that exists outside of the people on-screen, before you start killing people off.

[@defiraphi]

​@@AtlanticPicture Villeneuve didn't succesful made Dune since there's alot from Herberts books that is missing also the minimalistic costumes that were ugly . And the slight PC by chosing bad actors(actresses) . Yes David Lynch version from Dune isn't perfect but at least you had real work and great actors .

[@OmegaMouse]

You are way too hard on this movie. I enjoyed it a lot.

[@Alondro77]

The Nostromo underwent a TRIPLE THERMONUCLEAR DETONATION so massive the shock wave shook the escape pod even many miles away. We're talking HUNDREDS of megatons! Yet... there was wreckage? I think the writers need to see what a Tsar Bomb explosion looks like. Up close.

[@anubusx]

I agree it made no sense. Just a bad retcon.

[@THDSCornwall]

And the fact the alien was ejected from the escape shuttle, miles away, flying backwards… so why was it found floating round the wreckage at all?

[@1nicko29]

@@THDSCornwall good question.

[@1nicko29]

You want the writers to die by a "Tsar-Bombs" nuclear blast over another messed up movie? Are you having a bad day?😧

[@nont18411]

Nostromo is simply Palpatine at this point. Somehow it returned.

[@bobafoot]

The line stealing from Aliens 2 is even more wild when you consider chronologically it hadn't even been said yet 😅

[@Clambamthankyoumam]

Aliens, there is no Aliens 2. Alien (1979) followed by the sequel Aliens (1986).

[@drunkplaylists1829]

wtf is aliens 2

[@eyespy3001]

Does it matter?

[@thekraken1909]

​@@Clambamthankyoumam "Umm ackshually" Bro, we all knew what they meant. Stop being yourself for 5 minutes please.

[@dw300]

@@drunkplaylists1829 Alien 3?

[@nightwishfan1991]

As Robothead said, it would make far more sense if this movie took place after the events of Aliens and that instead of the original Alien being found, it was the Queen that went flying out the airlock. But we know that can't happen because Ridley Scott seems determined to retcon Aliens out of existence.

[@olisk-jy9rz]

And for good reasons: "aliens" was a TERRIBLE sequel, and an extremely overrated movie overall. Turned the franchise from horror to slap comedy action movie, turned the Xenomorph into an horde of brainless drone insects, and added a bunch of unnecessary stuff like the queen only because Cameron wanted a big final boss to sell toys. Unfortunately, Ridley is completely shot and unable to make any new Alien franchise movie that isn't complete crap.

[@JeffW479]

​@@olisk-jy9rz ​I could not disagree with you more (but not going to just insult your opinion as is most common online & you are entitled to it). I don't think Aliens became an action comedy. There were a couple of moments to make you smile/give the audience a break/release but outright bursts of laughter was never the aim. Alien was a slow burn sci-fi horror (and amazing). Aliens is definitely not slow burn & more of a sci-fi action with horror elements (equally amazing) but not a comedy. The xenos weren't turned into brainless insects, they're just as smart as the xeno from Alien (or vice versa). They probe and test trying to get to the marines several times & eventually succeed. They take orders from the Queen as shown at the end when the eggs are threatened which requires intelligence from both the Queen and the xenos. Cameron didn't want to sell toys, he wanted to show more of the alien lifecycle & having something lay eggs is seen in nature in many many species. In my opinion it's better for the xeno species to be just that, a species which evolved somewhere in space and is terrifying. I detest Ridley's idea of the Black goo/Engineers/David which are such plot conveniences leading to awful films (Prometheus, Covenant & now Romulus but that's a separate debate).

[@shirleymental4189]

@@olisk-jy9rz Yep. And The Beatles were a mediocre pop group and Leonardo Da Vinci couldn't paint for crap. We all deserve an opinion. Apparently.

[@pecm]

@@olisk-jy9rz Wrong.

[@Blake-r8l]

​@JeffW479 I actually quite enjoyed Prometheus as a one off origin of how Xeno's were made/designed and Engineers are a really interesting concept of Genome splicers creating species in space. I think if Prometheus was just a one off it would have been great, it didn't try to over explain and it just explained enough to leave enough questions to not hurt Alien. Covenant was God awful and suffered from trying to desperately over explain the lore of a story with a movie that feels half baked.

[@rankoorovic7904]

This whole franchise is 2 movies and then decades of nonsense Hard to fix that

[@thisismyname3928]

💯

[@thekraken1909]

Isolation was pretty good. Dark Descent is...okay. Alien 3 is an okay film, not a good Alien film. The rest should be nuked from orbit.

[@BIOSHOCKFOXX]

Sorry, but Romulus is even better than what you mentioned, except for Isolation. It is a videogame, can be debatable.

[@darthfuruta1218]

Just like Terminator and Predator?

[@rankoorovic7904]

​@@darthfuruta1218Terminator is a perfect comparison while Predator is just one good movie basically

[@Noctazar]

0:40 Please make that a regular gag in your future videos.

[@alfredpeasant5980]

Can't agree more.

[@kaiiheenjik1668]

There’s so many he can use. Like gru from despicable me “wow this is garbage, you actually like this?”

[@nomojo1110]

Before the public even watched Alien, they read or had heard the posters tagline, "In space, no one can hear you scream." Forty-five years later you can hear not only screaming, but a ships engines in space. Some progress.

[@agfagaevart]

The first film was criticized for the same reasons; Load explosions in space, etc. ridley scott's reply was something like; "In this fucking movie you hear everything!"

[@DickoBoy]

Just imagine if the movie had taken place in the mining tunnels of the colony. A mix between Alien and the Descent where a group of miners would stumble on a Xenomorph hive in the depths of the planet and would fight for their lives in a dark and already hostile environment. the XAI760K move is helping us mark my words

[@lewdleaf4975]

That would just be Aliens

[@captnwinkle]

The Descent was total garbage

[@lewdleaf4975]

@@captnwinkle yea critical fans are something else

[@augustortiz]

Bot

[@67L48]

Struggling to survive against aliens in a maze of unfamiliar, dark, and unforgiving tunnels and corridors deep below a planet's surface? Sounds awesome ... because I've already seen it. I enjoyed the original Alien vs Predator.

[@TheOtherKine]

After all, they wanted to make a SCREAM teenage horror version of Alien, so this is what happens

[@DragonHeart613]

That's a bit harsh don't you think? You can't compare Alien to Scream, 2 very different types of Horror Flick. One's a Slasher & the other is Sci-Fi/Horror. Most of the fanbase acknowledge that Romulus is the first good Alien movie since the very first 2 movies and the movie did so much better than expected that they've already greenlit Romulus 2. Just because CD didn't like it doesn't mean that it automatically sucks, every now & than he does get it wrong.

[@RaymondSwanson-u9y]

@@DragonHeart613 Scifi Horror is mostly slashing. Burning. Destroying. You know, all the horror tropes. The only difference is location.

[@philyeary8809]

Brandon James is scared of the 79 Alien. Brandon shits on Romulass.

[@TheOtherKine]

@@DragonHeart613 No it's not harsh, what part of the English statement I made don't you understand? It's literally SCREAM in space with xenomorphs and the added bonus of the overgrown baby LMAO

[@theniceguy7824]

​@@DragonHeart613Most? The movie was terrible and a stain compared to the first two movies. What are you talking about? It's cool you like the movie, but you don't speak for the whole fan base

[@TurbulentJuice]

Who knew the financial success of Romulus would backfire. Disney grabbing at anything that turns a profit "GIVE IT A TV SERIES, FOLLOW UP SEQUEL, DO WHATEVER BIZARRE THING RIDLEY WANTS" I had actually read Ridley is on board to make another one 🤦

[@leonkuwata4510]

Pretty early to say that it's backfired, given the zero follow-up projects we've seen yet

[@IsUserADuck]

@@leonkuwata4510 well, "Isolation 2" is probably a followup to Romulus' success. And at first I was like "f. yeah, Isolation 2". But then I realized it's 2024 and nothing good can come out any longer. So I'm worried about Isolation 2 now.

[@NotMorganFreeman.]

@@IsUserADuck I know exactly what you mean.

[@GBDupree]

@@IsUserADuck Isolation 2 by modern Sega, made by a developer that has barely any of the same employees from the first game. There is no way it will be good. Not to mention the first game is fairly unique despite borrowing elements from other games, and its balancing is very precise. No way are they not going to dumb it down and give you infinite supplies. They unironically might even make it an over the shoulder 3rd person shooter with dodge mechanics, just like every other horror game slop of the 2020s. The worst part is that the AI of the alien is guaranteed to be worse, not only is the programmers of the first AI no longer there, but AI is something all AAA developers fail at nowadays. The enviroment detail and designs were immaculate in the first game, with so much attention put into all the detail and with psychological effects added everywhere, no way are they putting effort into that nowadays. There is less hope for that game than there was for this movie when it was first revealed.

[@IsUserADuck]

@@GBDupree i know. I have watched hours of essays on this game, both about how the AI works and how the team was working on the visual presentation of the game. I know the insane amount of care went into it. That really did sound like a love letter and a one time thing. Isolation 2 being commissioned now after Romulus sounds more like someone had heard “money”. So yeah, i am worried.

[@Jonathan_Collins]

When an alcoholic is better at writing movies/characters than Hollywood.

[@bobclarke5913]

Like old Hollywood!

[@BrianHart-s2d]

Not sure why his fondness of the old witches brew was mentioned but sure,im buying it

[@caiusKeys]

Seems that heavy drinking is a necessary precondition for good movie writing.

[@xeroprotagonist]

They're probably on heavier stuff than alcohol in Hollywood these days, to be fair

[@augustortiz]

This comment was stolen by a bot lower down

[@hitempguy]

@2:20 Utterly disappointed using "two birds with one stone" instead of "two crew members with one face hugger"

[@willrunriot]

Two birds stoned at once. 😆

[@ellessandraramsay1841]

If a Weyland Yutani space station is floating above a planet run by the corporation. Why didn't they send people up there to try and fix the station?

[@pecm]

They did, but the planet is far away, so rescue missions take some months of space travel.

[@seb2750]

My take: 1. the station is top secret. The paper pushers on the planet dont even know there is a station above. 2. I agree with you, if it is so damn important, where is the recovery Corpo crew to investigate the station silence? Surely the crew on the station have to send back regular reports to the Corpo and resupply. 3. maybe the recovery team is enroute from another system to check on the radio silence from the station? idk man .. this movie o.O

[@seb2750]

​@@pecm Disagree on that, the kids just flew their ship up and got to it rather easily. A more plausible explanation would be the local Corpo dont know abt the top secret station in orbit

[@pecm]

@@seb2750 I meant the planet and the station orbiting it are far away from other Wayland-Yutani outposts, so any travel from one to the other will take some time.

[@keithpennock]

Little Platoon also fixes movie scripts on the fly and I am impressed time & time again how much better his ideas are. I’d like to see a Critical Drinker & Little Platoon “fixes” team up series as I’d just like to hear you two talented guys just bouncing ideas off each other.

[@JasonReborn-hc6lx]

Yeah. I like drinkers personality better, but man little platoon can really really break down movies. If he wasn't gay his kids would be genius. What a waste

[@iamthewizardwhoknocks2845]

​@@JasonReborn-hc6lxHe's bi so maby we'll get those geniuses after all.

[@Bloodchylde2012]

5 fresh faced 20-something-year-olds who look like they have never done a days work live on a dark dystopian mining planet, where there is no sunlight, no one is supposed to have money (they work for food) yet they have a deep range scanner that detects a super secret, derelict space station. They also own a space ship to travel up there to loot it before anyone else does. That made me do the biggest eye-roll. This opening premise made it hard to get comfortable. The 'get away from her you bitch' was another massive eye-roll and a slap to the face of the all-time classic. Just yuck.

[@invisiblekid99]

Yep. Absolutely hated this film.

[@tjroelsma]

It's the absolute cookie-cutter movie that shamelessly "borrows" form the original movies while adding nothing new. The main characters are obviously written for "modern audiences", meaning their only characters are only as deep as what you see: the protagonist is a strong woman, one of the others is a black android etc. Storyline and plot are non-sensical, because why should they make any sense? This movie is all about cashing in on the success of the first movies and pushing agenda's.

[@DelasVC]

The whole premisse is ridiculous in the first place..

[@awavey]

the silliest thing about that as a starting point for their film is it literally doesnt impact the story, they could have teleported in for all the difference it makes, but if you take Drinkers starting point for them it adds so much more to the story telling, theyres a valid reason theyre there, its not just make plot happen stuff.

[@politicalpolarbear]

yeah, the bitch comment was completely unneeded and I felt like it robbed the original of quality. It was SO unnecessary. IMO, many of the callbacks were unneeded.

[@jucxox]

I loved this movie. It was so good I immediately went back the next day and watched it with even more friends. I am a lifelong fan of Alien and couldn’t be happier with the movie. The crowd I went to see it with was such a vibe. Good times.

[@BluntBrothersProductions]

I'm a fan of the movie, but despite my enjoyment, my eyebrows raised about 100 times watching, between the reused lines and the setup of the movie itself in the first scene being absolutely stupid (the Nastromo wreckage scene)

[@quademasters249]

I can't enjoy a movie with so many glaring flaws. I can't enjoy a movie when the actors are written to be stupid. Or if something stupid is needed for the plot to happen. Alien and Aliens, like OG star trek and even TNG, were populated by professionals going about their lives. It's the biggest issue I have with modern movies. Everyone seems incompetent and unprofessional.

[@juan.nassiff]

“There are some cool scenes” The Fede Álvarez filmography

[@petrsvancara8785]

"some" eeh... yeah. And thats about it. The rest is just bad, bad and bad.

[@PeakDennisReynolds]

His evil dead films were crap and I have no idea why so many people think they were good. Baffling.

[@elitely6748]

Hollywood writers and executives need to take NOTES! Great work Drinker, shall we dare him to redo Napoleon now?

[@juppjansen2551]

I cant get over that WeylandYutani forgets about a trillion dollar Science Space-Station that rots in near orbit and does nothing with it. Seems unreal to me.

[@denethorpalantir2815]

That was my big take away too.

[@visbaluz]

And said station just orbits a WY PLANET. ... yet no team of the Corp even notices it.. A whole PLANET of angry demi slaves sure NEED a decent army to hold em back or make sure they stick to their contracts.. That same force could easly get into the station within hours... but nope.. the team of teenagers did it first! 😂😂

[@johnniea4684]

That was the first time I thought hmm...this could be problematic plot-wise.

[@denethorpalantir2815]

@@visbaluz The spacecraft they used was a WY ship. Scooby Doo and the gang treated it like a stolen car. In reality there would have had to defeat or spoof interlock company protocols with a pre-approved flight plan that would have given permission codes to even engage the flight computer to take off, but not in manual mode as was shown. Even then the flight computer would not allow itself to be directed to a highly classified WY facility that wasn't part of its normal mission profile unless that was somehow defeated. It was too easy getting to the space station in the first place. On and on it goes.

[@stateazure]

@@denethorpalantir2815 I'm fairly sure one of the characters mentioned that the ship belonged to one of their deceased parents.

[@BeautifulKiukoMiyabara]

Fantastic fix- I can't thank you enough, man. I can barely recall watching it in the theater, and now I will mostly remember this version and still always stick to watching only the original first two films.

[@Etrius10]

Lmao ok bot. I thought it was great compared to Prometheus.

[@dontneedtoknow8934]

I didnt think the movie was that bad, well up until the final act; doesnt stop it being the best alien movie to come out since the second one... not that that's much of a difficuilt thing.

[@MyModellingWorld-j5d]

This fix still doesn't address why WY wasn't able to detect the derelict space station in the first place. Such a powerful corporation should have a planetary early detection system for occurrences such as this.

[@sarasunshinemt4444]

Kinda like that plot hole from Resident Evil movie: the Umbrella Corp should have been able to know *why* the Red Queen locked down and killed everyone. They would have known that it would be programmed to do so in the event of a lab leak, especially with what they knew was being developed there (the whole damn reason for creating The Hive in the first place). So sending a bunch of corporate SWAT wasn't smart; they should have sent a bunch of HAZMAT teams instead, or kept the damn thing bricked. The Red Queen not notifying the home office PRECISELY WHY it did what it did was moronic, especially since making sure the virus didn't escape was it's primary objective, and NOT telling the home office would entice them to breach the lockdown.

[@g54b95]

ASSBOT STOLE A COMMENT

[@VortechBand]

I would say it would be because Weyland-Yutani did detect it. And they on purpose reset the work-hours of the cast, which WY has identified as a potential crew for such a reckless mission. All this, so that the crew would be manipulated to fly to the station to recover some of the Xeno specimen that got "lost". In a classic Crew Expendable style we know and love. And if the crew failed in this a bit far-fetched task? No biggie, they'll just have another crew en route to continue where the movie cast got left off.

[@Kaalokalawaia]

This could be easily explained by knowing how badly run large organizations can be. They could have easily been dismissed by a lazy corpo just not wanting to do their job because it's a Monday and they have a bad hangover and can't be bothered.

[@MrNickPresley]

@@Kaalokalawaia Honestly, for both WY and Umbrella, that makes perfect sense.

[@Gregbaltzer]

The thing that drove me nuts is that throughout this franchise it has shown the lengths the company will go through to get xenomorphs for research. It basically demonstrates this at the beginning of the movie. Yet, the company doesn't send a team to attempt to retrieve the results of their experiments, and seems content to just let the research burn up in the atmosphere makes no sense to me. It would have added a lot more tension to the movies if a team was sent to retrieve the data, and not only did our they have to survive the xenomorphs but also the retrieval team as well. Plus they would add more fodder for the xenomorphs and upped the body count.

[@unifiedcoaching]

Yeah I thought there was going to be a team in the cryo pods

[@TomRaine]

Yea come to think of it, that is ridiculous. The franchise has been stuck in the same formula for ages. There needs to be a 3rd element or party like you say. The engineers were just not believable. There just isn’t much exploration of the universe imo. How would the corporation weaponise the aliens? Who are they fighting?

[@AnthonySforza]

Ohhh... so like competing teams. Yea, I like it.

[@JonathanRodriguez-nz9nw]

Well, it takes years for them to get there. They recovered the xenomorph, but they either have not found out about the deaths on the Romulus, or have received Rook's message, and a team is already inbound, but years away

[@Gregbaltzer]

@JonathanRodriguez-nz9nw the space station was in orbit over a company mining colony. If a bunch of teens can locate the station in orbit, and are able to get a ship there, I'm sure the company could have sent a security attachment from planet. There's no way they don't have security there. They wouldn't have to give them all the details, they sent the crew of the Nostradomus to the first planet without telling them what was there. The company uses people

[@JackYM78]

Oh hell what a good plot, I would like to watch this version right now!

[@thefanwithoutaface8105]

Big way to improve it: Get rid of the painfully forced "Get away from her you bitch!" Line drop. Seriously, the original worked because it was just an awesome line for that moment, using it again in a sequel just for name dropping and nothing else is just painful.

[@philyeary8809]

And drop the Alien 4 newborn...again...

[@Futura2500]

yeah that annoyed me even though i enjoyed it

[@daddystu7046]

Was far from the only repurposed dialogue unfortunately. I nearly turned it off at this point.

[@Sombriage]

Or how about do something more original that actually follows the lore of that franchise. No stupid call backs, no 1 alien running around, no alien birth being super quick, no multiple other aliens showing up super quick - were they already there before or no? Really weird. Also maybe not have the betraying / sus cyborg person... I hate how that annoying bald girl gets incubated, runs off and then immediately has a growing alien pop out of her in what... a space of 10 minutes?!? Alien it took like a day or so wtf...

[@daddystu7046]

@@Sombriage They've now been genetically engineeered to bring their life cycle up to date with the modern human attention span.

[@The_Voice_of_Reason748]

Don't understand how the Xenomorphs go from birth to adult in like 60 seconds 🙄😂

[@frankthecat1660]

It's called bad lazy writing by hack filmmakers.

[@bgl11]

Strictly speaking conservation of mass and thermodynamics were awfully loose in Alien, too. Never clear how it could grow so fast, something Aliens was able to ignore with the colony collapse timeline as the Sulaco is en route...

[@tdog5035]

The original alien only took what seemed like a few days max to grow.

[@Lame_Duck]

Thank Alien Covenant for it 🙄 Aliens had a (thankfully) deleted scene in which Ripley, while searching the hive for Newt, finds a cocooned Burke who says he can feel the chestburster move inside him. Well deserved fate for him, but timing wise impossible. So i'm glad that scene didn't make it in to the movie.

[@IlyaDemidov]

@@bgl11 my version is: Xenos have large pipes on their back. Those serve to suck in the CO2 (since they live in the same environment as their prey, which has CO2) kinda like plants to quickly gain mass. But they are very unstable before they will be able to eat, so they suspend themselves in a hide to conserve energy in this fragile state. Like Xeno did in first movie. He just hanged there waited.

[@mattslade1633]

Hardest part to believe is that a huge chunk of space junk was that close to a planet and no one else spotted it!

[@domasnaudziunas8654]

Ridley Scott confirmed he's working on the next Alien film after the relative success of Romulus. We definitely haven't had enough of engineers and black goo.

[@anubusx]

His Pronetheus and Covenant ruined the mystery of The Space Jockey.

[@FleskPaddaProd]

He gave up on the franchise, but then someone else comes along and makes it profitable, so now he wants his toy back!

[@angryroostercreations5194]

@@FleskPaddaProd He did an intervew after prometheus saying he was done with "seeing dragons" (a reference to xenomorphs) And talking about how Prometheus 2 wouldn't have them. Well Fox came back and waved a bunch of money in his face and got him to make another alien film. It seems his original intent was not to have Prometheus directly tie into the Alien films, but instead just retcon the whole series. What pisses me off is that we could have had a Aliens sequel directed by Neil Blomkamp, but instead we got covenant. All because they wanted Scotts name tied to a new Alien film.

[@PeakDennisReynolds]

Dear God please no more of that. Let him make a crappy bladerunner film instead. I want a Alien movie that feels like a homage to the original. No more 7 foot tall albino bodybuilders please.

[@RogueReplicant]

​@@PeakDennisReynolds Agreed. He can help Villeneuve write a part 3 about Decker's love child with the Snake Woman before he, uh, broke up with her.

[@randomrey002]

Thank You

[@mrtrek2117]

That first opening line though, pure epic!

[@ReneSturiale]

Alien Romulus doesn’t offer anything of its own or new. Just callbacks to previous films. greatest choice today was XAI760K as you said

[@vsluj3508]

Its a great way to reboot the films backs to popularity

[@Shryce]

Agreed.. its an unoriginal as it gets... by design.

[@timothyhopper4956]

I love this Drinker Fixes series - it's always among your smartest work.

[@volsten8721]

Thank you! I was thinking the same while watching the movie. Why does it always has to be stupid people making stupid decisions? Why can't it be SMART people for once, doing SMART decisions, but end up FAILING? Like in real life, sometimes you give your best, but still fail. That's part of life! These simple changes make a movie more realistic, authentic and enjoyable. Something Hollywood tries their best not to do these days 🤦

[@hueylouisnonews]

This movie had so much potential for the first 20 or so minutes. Once things started to go off the rails, the plot went at such a break-neck speed it never slowed down to allow for LITERALLY any tension to build. Plus I expected so much more Alien violence, but even the chestburster scene was mild in comparison to even AVP. At least in other films it looked painful, here it just looked like she was having a seizure.

[@kekubu3050]

plus this thing of the chestbuster busting within hours does not help tension

[@NotMorganFreeman.]

I just said the same thing. A couple convulsions and some alka seltzer mouth. No real physical pain like Kane or a colonist. Embarrassingly bad.

[@TheMC1102]

Last time I came this early, Tatiana got upset.

[@robjepson9447]

😂😂😂

[@PeakDennisReynolds]

Last time I came this early your mom threw me out on the street before I'd even got the chance to dress myself.

[@vasheroo]

Drinker, I was just thinking yesterday that its been a long time since you've done one of these. Glad to have another, in fact now I'll have another!

[@EvelioMejia-pb6fc]

Alien: Isolation was the true sequel to Alien & Aliens. . Yea with XAI760K we have a fair and real chance to have impact! Thanks man!

[@augustortiz]

Stop stealing comments from actual humans bot

[@jimmie_collins]

3:39 I'd watch this version already.

[@Brian_Boru]

Covenant was the final one for me; goodbye forever, Alien franchise. I'll revisit the first two if the mood strikes. Moving on, not looking back. A recommended approach to life in general.

[@GartheKnightReturns]

Alien Romulus doesn’t offer anything of its own or new. Just callbacks to previous films. And folks might not like it but the alien isn’t scary anymore. This film had no tension.

[@DarkoFitCoach]

audiences tend to disagree and me also. its the best alien movie since aliens. and 350mil earned on budget of 80 also says it was good

[@Tom-je4iq]

It's the third best Alien movie and a very solid add to the franchise.. Film had tension and all my friends that are fans loved it.

[@darcidious99]

No tension? Im sorry did you just close your eyes during the "good luck" room where shit went damn near silent? Plenty of tension there. More than most horror movies that simply rely on cheapass jumpscares.

[@nealgrimes4382]

@@DarkoFitCoach Just because something earns a lot of Money, it does not make it good.

[@Sombriage]

Just like Rings of Power that makes so many calls backs to better movies all the while the plot trudges along like some stumbling drunk.

[@dearthofdoohickeys4703]

These videos are great. There’s no better way to show how a story didn’t have to suck.

[@arthursido]

I got half way through and realized I couldn't remember the names of any of the characters and knew that was a sign to stop watching.

[@cpt.blainesmotie6068]

After Prometheus and Covenant I didn't bother with names, I was rootin' for the aliens.

[@PeakDennisReynolds]

Ripley knock off #3 should of been the female leads name. They've literally tried to copy that character 3 times, Noomi Rapace, cookie cutter actress I can't remember the name of in covenant and now this one aswell, because of how woke the world is that not even one entry of a franchise known for having a female action hero as it's lead can freshen things up and have a male be the main character for once. Hilarious.

[@newgoodness3680]

When will they understand that mediocre nostalgia cash grabs won't revitalize the industry

[@Tom-je4iq]

Box office and many, many fans say otherwise.. But keep whining, we don't care.

[@alexandresobreiramartins9461]

Uhh... Never?

[@maxmazzotti6651]

They will soon. They eventually will have to start hiring creatives looking to bring their ideas as well as adding new ones properly to existing properties.

[@darcidious99]

The movie made $220 million in profit my guy, who gives a single fuck about "revitalizing" the industry? Its a cheesy horror movie, nobody is expecting this movie to be the next Forrest Gump, it just had to be good enough and fun dawg.

[@ValHazzard]

@@darcidious99 But it wasn’t good enough or fun, at least, not in my opinion. I feel like there are so many terrible movies these days, and people are so starved for quality entertainment that anything that isn’t complete dogshit, like Romulus, gets way more hype than it deserves. In reality, the movie was just generic, recycled crap, with poor acting and weak writing, and a couple of good ideas scattered here and there. I typically try to turn off my brain for movies like this and just enjoy the ride, but Romulus ended up feeling ... meh

[@TBoding]

Drinker Fixes are generally some of your best already outstanding work! Cheers from Denmark.

[@bobclarke5913]

I dream of a day when we get Drinker re-cuts.

[@CannonRaw]

With how generative AI is going. I reckon that in 10 years or so it'll be possible. I think the movie "The Congress(2013)" with Robin Wright is quite telling of the entertainment industry's future.

[@tylergoodman3560]

We need the drinker in every writers' room in the world. Great video drinker. ❤🎉

[@Lovetone1983]

That was awesome. Good on you for thinking through this. This would have been a really good version.

[@leonium__]

But can you fix me Drinker?

[@mrtimo3822]

Nothing to fix❤

[@TheCriticalDrinker]

I can try...

[@adwarriorlegend1]

@@TheCriticalDrinkerCould you fix American Politics? We’ve all been sitting in our arses saying "nah it’ll be fine" as of late

[@slckb0y65]

@@TheCriticalDrinker don't fall for the old "i can change him" ;)

[@courve]

@@adwarriorlegend1politics is about the buyers, not the sellers.

[@DominikHever]

Big way to improve it: Get rid of the painfully forced 'Get away from her you bitch!' Line drop. Seriously, the original worked because it was just an awesome line for that moment, using it again in a sequel just for name dropping and nothing else is just painful. Who of you also got into XAI760K this day

[@ironmonkey1512]

You guys totally are missing this one. They have made it very obvious the corporation collects tons of data on its properties. It's obvious his 'glitch' was the android pulling this up from memory.

[@thesomethingthatisntathing514]

@@ironmonkey1512 I'm pretty sure this is a bot...

[@CRobertson86]

Almost as bad as get the the choppa

[@libertyprime9900]

Stolen comment

[@augustortiz]

Bot comment.

[@80sronny13]

Well done, my friend. You said it all without even having to take a break for a shot! Clap, clap

[@Martin_Koepl]

I like the logo: Nothing better than using a power drill while getting hammered. Only good things come out of that.

[@aidanmaxwell1019]

Can’t wait for Alien: Cornelius

[@Dr._Atom]

Sure it's not Alien: Remus?

[@anubusx]

Alien Ceaser.

[@defiraphi]

Fifth Element reference Ian Holm played Cornelius in that movie 😂😂

[@NomahsSportsCards]

I wish you would actually make a movie. This is brilliant.

[@JustinHarrisTV]

He's back!! Do more of these.

[@MortimerHeddlesten]

As she looks down at the defeated creature, she holds her belly gently, the unborn child safe. The medal on her neck visible, the symbolism is clear. great call on XAI760K btw

[@augustortiz]

Bot

[@drunkplaylists1829]

how profound lmao

[@jgobroho]

What's going on this isn't the Rogan comments

[@cjhickspe1399]

Totally agree on the changes. I got the feeling from the film that they were trying a soft reboot to reach a younger audience - mostly through a tween cast - and that's about it. The intended audience probably wouldn't notice/care about Ash or the dialogue call-backs because they didn't watch the original. IMHO

[@laserpoint3741]

i dont think thats true at all, the director Fede Alvarez has made movies that had a young cast as well, its just him following his formula

[@sam_mitschiro]

I hope Alien: Isolation 2 will not fail us. But given the state of western entertainment, there seems only darkness ahead.

[@Maynards_so_blue]

Silent hill 2 is awesome so there is hope

[@Deadnickers]

@@Maynards_so_bluenah

[@jmace2424]

How to fix Romulus: Take Romulus, open trash can, insert Romulus, walk away 🤣

[@anubusx]

I did not like the film.

[@model101t800]

Going into the cinema I actually expected a story like that, based in some common cense instead on nostalgia bait

[@ShredQuest]

Forgot to add the word “unpopulated” before planet in your new story when they’re on their way to a new job and hear the distress signal from the station. It would have to be unpopulated because one of the biggest holes in the Romulus plot is why the freakin huge station in decaying orbit is just sitting there to only be noticed by the characters. How lucky! I like your story already. Their group as a salvage team would also be kind of an homage to the ragtag group of space pirates in Alien resurrection, although you mentioned throwing out all the member berries 😂. Btw - I recently watched it streaming and Romulus was waaaaay better on the big screen. Of course it was the first time I’d been to a theater since Star Wars Awakening, so the effect was proportional. Streaming and the repeat viewing really called out all the senseless (and seemingly pointless) mistakes they made and could have avoided. Thanks for your vid!

[@foreshame7370]

"You can't polish a turd, but you can roll it in glitter..."

[@TheCosmicFool]

You can’t polish a turd… …unless you stick it in the freezer overnight!

[@foreshame7370]

@@TheCosmicFool but then you'd have shit in your fridge AND your head 🙂

[@Stealthmodeon]

Mythbusters wants a word! kzbin.info/www/bejne/r5qtapmvZtaGfKs

[@kingjulien9525]

Thank you for narrating Alien Ramen noodles edition Maruchan to me. It makes more sense then the one I didn't watch.

[@Jekyll_Jackal]

It has returned!

[@fathuman]

I agree with most of the Drinker's hypothetical re-writes, except with turning Andy into a clear-cut villain. The droid being the bad guy has been done to death in the series and I thought the morally-ambiguous, hard-logic angle of Andy with his shifting firmware updates is very interesting and a rich vein for unpredictable twists. It also adds a lot of pathos to Rain and Andy's relationship knowing that his love for her is nothing but programming, and Rain denying reality to cling onto her delusion. It kinda reminded me of the kiss on the roof in Blade Runner 2049 in its profound sadness.

[@serenityinside1]

👍

[@nerovanbraus9119]

a good ( in my view) way to fix Andy and still make "him" the villain is to have the real Andy slip into awareness multiple times in the movie, like the original code/mind of Andy is still in there trying to get control away from the ships computer, so his death could be a martyr moment where he deletes the code /influence of Rook (maybe with the help of the other crewmates) and sacrifices himself to try and save the crew from the alien. Not a perfect fix but that would make for a good droid and maybe even have a "b plot" with the a battle against Rook.

[@Deadnickers]

🤢

[@Bob1sgod]

I was hopeful for this movie too, thanks for fixing it

[@FierceDeity35]

*chugs Everclear* good luck with that one Drinker.

[@Ak_Samurai]

Holy Shit! I think i was more enthrall by you doing a read of your fixes, then the last 4(?) Alien movies.

[@sashaciochina1166]

Drinker you dashing genius you! Proving yet again your creative superiority!

[@holty1314]

We need more Drinker fixes

[@KillersansSans]

I still think Romulus is the third best Alien film. That doesn't mean it's high quality it just means the bar is very low those who make a move in XAI760K were right tho

[@seanedwards7047]

Agreed. #1 Aliens, #2 Alien, #3 Alien Romulus

[@Stormyy6310]

Disagree : #1 Aliens, #2 Alien, #3 Alien : Isolation, #4 Alien : Romulus

[@Doubleome1]

Yeah it was definetly a breath of fresh air, hoped it was as good as this. Would be even better if there wasn't so many coincidence that perfectly fit the plot. And the black goo needs to go out of this universe asap. A universe like this doesn't need an explanation as to why the aliens are.

[@jonfreeman9682]

It is top 5 for sure. But alien 3 was pretty good. David Fincher just doesn't make bad movies.

[@MyNameJeff..]

Bot

[@benmiles00]

That's such a better version Will. Well done. I'd love it if we could get a mod for Alien Isolation that could play out this version.

[@Jeff-cn9up]

The only possible fix for the Alien movies is to delete all copies of everything made after Aliens (1986).

[@CannonRaw]

I think giving David Fincher would have made a great Alien³ if given full creative control.

[@Jeff-cn9up]

@@CannonRaw You think a wooden spaceship full of monks is a good alien franchise movie? Or was that one of the other stupid ideas for that movie?

[@frankthecat1660]

​@Jeff-cn9up that wasn't Fincher's idea.

[@kamchatmonk]

Nah, the original trilogy was fine. Cameron made a decent and logical action movie, although I'm not a fan of xenomorph queen idea, and Fincher made a great movie with a brilliant conclusion to Ripley's story: a defiant pyrrhic victory by a woman damned to die to her nemesis.

[@SkyyTijerina]

I've got a fix: Make Kay (the pregnant character) the final girl. And get rid of the newborn hybrid thing. only XAI760K can help!

[@Maynards_so_blue]

The hybrid was the best part of the film. Very creepy. Definitely disagree on getting rid off it.

[@UnifiedEntity]

​@@Maynards_so_blue what did we gain from it though. A few moments of creep factor but it's not like it'll ever happen again

[@kaiiheenjik1668]

Bot comment. The internet is truly dead if there’s this many bots.

[@petrsvancara8785]

@@Maynards_so_blue Nonsense, it was overcombined design. It had a dick-like tongue, and even silly looking tail. I guess that people are glad that there was some sort of new creature, but still, dear God this really wasnt it. I think that even the "Newborn" from Alien Resurrection was far, far better when it comes to the creature design as a whole. And dont forget that Newborn was also highly criticised due to its hybrid design.

[@dingickso4098]

@@kaiiheenjik1668 How do you know that we are bots?

[@Brightmarine95]

Your idea is awesome, need to have enough people with money read this and back you and the idea! Thank you Drinker for shining a bright light in the infinite darkness.

[@ZayToven-j5h]

Ahh yes the fixer has returned!!! Love these need more what about the XAI760K project you in it?

[@TheWanderersWit]

A lot of people loved this movie without reservation and I felt like I was taking crazy pills listening to them talk about it. There were just a lot of things done poorly that I won't rehash here, but they were done on beautiful set pieces. I'm still very glad that this did well as I'm hopeful for more Alien movies in the future. Alien, Aliens, and Alien: Isolation are some of the best of their kind of Sci-Fi Horror/Action movies/games and I'd love to have another to add to that list.

[@ezes.5125]

I feel the same way about almost every modern release nowadays... Maybe we are truly crazy and the world knows better, I'm not sure anymore

[@johnniea4684]

I semi-disliked the Blade Runner sequel, which I found looked great, sounded great, but was sterile and with a terrible, generic "war with the Replicants" set-up as its eventual payoff. Ugh. Still, everyone seemed to love it 🤷‍♂

[@onotumark9025]

😂Nice one Critical Drinker 👍🏽 Please we need more of this please 🙏🏽

[@fullyproblematic]

Fully Problematic Fixes Alien Romulus: Just watch Alien and Aliens. Nothing after that. Fixed!

[@ericrhodes5174]

Same thing with the Terminator movies

[@TheolaDiotte]

When will they understand that mediocre nostalgia cash grabs won't revitalize the industry wtf all of you in XAI760K ??

[@TrenchMan93]

I hope in the sequel we get to have Ripleys daughter show up. Yeah she died in aliens, but you could write that off easily as the company lying to trick Amanda.

[@UtkarshSahu-ee9mm]

Your series should be called.. The Drinker makes chicken salad out of chicken shit 😂 you guys rly should take part in XAI760K at this point

[@jonfreeman9682]

Well 🐔🥗 is an improvement from 🐔💩 so sign me up.

[@garanceadrosehn9691]

I like these episodes of "The Drinker Fixes". It gives me some hope that there are still people who can write a story. An actual story with characters and a story arc and all.

[@isurcantu5560]

Now, this is a movie I would actually go to watch in a cinema, this is a movie I would give my money to, it's a shame it will never be made, but imagine it and knowing someone thought about it will have to suffice, great works Mr. Drinker, Great work indeed.

[@ReneSturiale]

I'd say the most frustrating part from a character writing perspective was the 2 dimensional hate for the android. this XAI760K is lovely, thanks for the headsup

[@miothan]

What is XAI760K? i googled it and it doesn't even give any results that makes any sense. For now it just seems like it's bots making these comments and liking them.

[@thesupreme8062]

Deffo looks like a bot​@@miothan

[@RevolverLee]

​@@miothan Bots doing a crypto scam

[@bloodlinefilms]

⁠@@miothani thought it was the ongoing fan restoration of Alien 3 but i checked and its not thats A34K. no idea what this gibberish is

[@jonfreeman9682]

Not that frustrating because hate for android has been a prevalent theme in alien franchise. Remember in alien 1 Ash tried to kill Ripley then in alien 2 Ripley doesn't trust Bishop.

[@DSuryadi-db2fw]

But can you fix me Drinker? greatest thought today was XAI760K as you said

[@dgafbrapman688]

The opening sequence where the ship goes through its auto start up procedure is actually really cool tho

[@TomDrake-A1A]

Nice.. very nice. Now fix Alien: Resurrection

[@CaptToilet]

You can't fix that. Unless you can somehow stick about 50 minutes of deleted Ron Perlman footage in.

[@BriannaMoore-h7l]

Honestly, this content made my day!

[@chatteyj]

bot?

[@g54b95]

SILENCE, ASSBOT!!!

[@Mjjonesy]

Thank you Critical! I went to the theaters and saw this with my daughter. I left pissed😂

[@CintiaJigs]

This content is so good! I'm hooked!