The Foolishness of The Nice Guys

[@Forged88]

Get my new book payhip.com/b/u367i

[@Stranzua]

I'll tell you what, being a nice guy has been painful, but it leads you to see people and the world for what they truly are. A complete disaster.

[@zaho87]

Don't be a nice guy. Be a good guy. Know the difference.

[@rollzolo]

Tuco benedicto pacifico Juan Maria ramirez

[@Wahinies]

Then there are plenty of videos that being a good guy is not enough.

[@grimlockplazz4964]

Fuck this shit nice and good guys, be respectable and true to yourself before anyone

[@TheDarkAdventure]

​@@Wahinies they think if they use good, instead of nice girls will like them. That's not how it works.

[@AlejjSi]

@@Wahinies It may not be good enough to "successful" in the meaning of this word in the 21st century, but it is the only way if you want to be able to stand straight infront the mirror and not feel ashamed of yourself. If being mean to other people that don't deserve it and using them means being good enough, then I stand proud being not good enough. I can do bad things and I do to people that do bad things to me or my close friends, but I just cant stand being like this to those that trust me. It just isn't right.

[@ADee-nc7iv]

Nice guy, Alpha male, Simp, Sigma, we have been stripped of all individuality and all uniqueness that men are either this or that. The same goes for women and now without an identity we immediately put everyone in a specific category and judge them by that. I open a door for a woman, I am a simp, I treat her like trash I am alpha, we are so far gone that we have lost what makes us unique. Perhaps your name can define you as a unique person that cannot be replaced or replicated, but I say this to say don't let society define who you are or what you should be like. Follow your own path, remove labels and just be you. Keep it simple, otherwise you end up watching 100s of KZbin videos of men you don't know or will ever meet in real life telling you what you can and cannot be. *Please take this opinion with a grain of salt. Don't dive down the rabbit hole*

[@Chyronn]

You open a door for a woman, you're a gentleman, not a simp. It shows you were raised properly. If she has a problem with it, it's her problem not yours and doesn't diminish your character. Ultimately all we do it categorise people so we can predefine them. In this age of social media and people watching by proxy, we've lost the art of communicating in person.

[@JunkersJu109]

this is the first real advice I've heard from anyone. Thanks. I refuse to be labeled and broken down into simple parts for general consumption. I am my own universe, and nothing anyone can change that.

[@AmirGTR]

I define Sigma as one who is a summation of Alpha and Beta, meaning he/she can be whichever one whenever needed. It's not so much an identity as an attribute. With that being said, I agree with your statement. Humans aren't rigid products of engineering, they're organic and reconfigure constantly. *Therefore a rigid identity, is nothing but a limitation.*

[@aoryu555]

@@AmirGTR So let's define Omega as one who isn't trying to define the limitations of others as if they are attributed a finite potential of happiness based on libido People are far more diverse than the Greek alphabet could ever represent 🕊️

[@stdennis19]

It’s what this reality is now. I get the feeling though the maker of this vid has/still is this supposed nice guy. Perhaps only through sheer hate of themselves, did they change

[@amberprice9003]

My mother instilled those values in me very hard. It took me years to realise that it doesn't make me a respected person like she claimed to and even more years to fight off my Nice Guy instincts. I wasted my entire high school and college years and ended up being abused becuase of it. And my mother still claims that's the correct course of behaviour

[@amberprice9003]

@@Riven0x Nah, my mother genuenly believes that and behaves this way towards other people too. She is also dead certain others behave like this too. She still doesn't believe me that college students drink for example

[@TheBontekraai]

because it is. it's just this world that sees those traits as something weak and people will often try to take advantage of it. that's why learning boundaries are very important. but being nice means you are strong. because you choose to be what everyone else is afraid of. and i am not saying to wish it on anyone, but they will have way higher chances of chronic ilnesses later in life. and will probably live alot shorter too. advice like the title of the video is basically saying: i don't want to work through my issues, so YOU stop being nice.

[@buzzbuzzard3809]

Seems your mother did everything right. The people that mistreated you had shit parenting and instead of recognizing that for what it is you throw your own mother under the bus to become one of the scumbags. No. We need more good people in this world. Research what the opposite of a nice guy really is. Study men like Putin and Lukaschenko, they´re stonehearted, evil people. These types of people cause all of the problems and suffering for so many people.

[@joseph6243]

Living this way often rewards women. They can get by playing the "I'm a piteous victim but I'm nice so love me and meet my needs" card. It's a product of this false assumption that gender equality is actually a real thing.

[@theangrydweller1002]

@@amberprice9003brake the line of bitches

[@mohamadjavadpaybaf5326]

I was a loser ، a fool that loved others despite what they were ، I changed myself after reading the book "no more Mr.nice guy" it is really a way out.

[@jackthomas9137]

What are the main life changing points you learned to help a fellow man

[@Verårtu]

@@jackthomas9137 Making sure your desire of changes is stronger than everything or even make it your life meaning; so it'll become dangerous if you fail to change.

[@jackthomas9137]

@@Verårtu so like when I workout I need to desire to become better no matter what and stay consistent?

[@greatestever7623]

@@jackthomas9137 put yourself 1st SELF PRIORITY

[@Renotalks]

Ah yes this book was soo helpful, I stopped my people pleasing attitude and started working on myself.

[@cobaltsurlin4888]

Most “Nice guys” had their rage and assertiveness suppressed when growing up. Which leads them to appease for people approval. When that fails they either take three options. #1 they manage to unlock their inner rage so they stand up for themselves. Or #2 they devolve into “simps”. A video on how to claim your inner rage and assertiveness would good if haven’t already made one.

[@cobaltsurlin4888]

#3 they become school shooters when they use that rage incorrectly

[@mannye21]

I think it is the opposite, they likely never knew how to master their rage since they never "used" or "felt" it when young, imo.

[@Artisticchaos]

@@cobaltsurlin4888 this Be EXCLUSIVE to America, lol.😂😂😂😂

[@Verårtu]

@@Artisticchaos Knife attack in Britain

[@sasquatchsiosaurus]

I think the outcome largely depends on your feminine and masculine role models. I had a very domineering mother, and although my parents stayed together, I don't have much of a recollection of my father's presence, even though he was present. I was a "simp" throughout my 20's, but I'd never be a high school shooter. That seems to me to be lacking in any compassion, which is a feminine trait.

[@ryoheikobayashi819]

Don't get it twisted, this doesn't mean you should be a monster all the time. Being nice is means you can afford to be nice. It's like giving back to people because you can afford to. Help yourself first before helping somebody, Not the other way around. Peace!

[@HenrySomeone]

Honestly, the most successful people pretty much are monsters all the time, somewhat controlled to be sure, but monsters nonetheless.

[@ryoheikobayashi819]

@@HenrySomeone completely fine. I've seen these monsters and hey, they are winners for sure. But I'd like to keep a little bit of humanity in me. I'll have my own concept of success. Wishing you the best, We're all gonna make it brah.

[@HenrySomeone]

@@ryoheikobayashi819 Hey, I can't be a monster all the time either, it's actually a struggle to be enough of a one in crucial moments, but I'm just stating my observations. You're either born with it, or not. Yes, you can fake it to a degree, convincingly even...for a while, but you can't keep it up indefinitely if that's not who you really are.

[@Gin-San101]

​@@HenrySomeonethey are successful in monetary gain but are the successful in humanity?

[@deepwashington499]

​@@Gin-San101 I would say so

[@VinayDhiman132]

I am a nice guy so far and my life is fucking hell (no friends, respect from even parents and any skills or achievements) i should change my character and accept hard work and pain in rest of my life . I will change my nice guy tag . Thank You

[@NofapSemenretention]

I am just like you don't wanna be nice buy anymore

[@d16024]

I think you can still be nice but stand up for yourself, be assertive, get confidence maybe by working out and learn new things.

[@Punk_On_Demand]

Remember.. there’s nothing wrong with being a good guy, but there’s everything wrong with being a nice guy!!

[@DawnshieId]

I love you and I'll be pulling for you. God make this hero brave! 💛

[@VinayDhiman132]

@@Punk_On_Demand without accepting your dark present life , your disturbed parents and Loneliness you can not be a good guy . Being nice guy attracts bullies , fraud and psychopath people. Being good guy forces you to have sympathy for those who always hurts you , Bad guys and Distrubed immature parents

[@rajangoenka4647]

I like how this video puts it out there without any "nice"ness. And that there no solutions given, to do this or do that. Just plain statements that strike at the core. No matter how bad or good hand you are dealt with, you need to just plough through. Build a personality, build priorities, build meaningful connections, build an empire no matter how big or small, that defines who you are.

[@joshrust7691]

Well, I haven’t seen a more accurate representation of myself in my early 20. Glad the Marine Corps beat that out of me

[@derek96720]

The key to overcoming your nice guy tendencies is to think about one of your long-time heroes. For many of us, our heroes growing up were a mixture of kind, assertive, intelligent, strong, and confident without being arrogant. Become that person. Become fit. Learn new skills. Pursue new interests that test your limits and your comfort level. You will slowly gain in intellect and capability, until that quiet confidence comes with them. Become the person you always wished you could be, and don't make excuses for the things that ARE in your control. When you truly get on the road to becoming that person, you'll start to truly love and respect yourself, and others will naturally be attracted to you. Only now, you won't warp who you are in some attempt to make yourself more appealing to them. You won't be a nice guy. You'll be a good man.

[@steven5548]

Beautifully said

[@skrttskrtt7534]

True confidence does like this: It's okay if they do like me or NOT..I am capable on what I am doing in life .

[@HenrySomeone]

With most of today's jobs, just staying fit (properly fit anyway, the kind that lends you an attraction bonus) will take up most of your free time, leaving very little to pursue many new interests, if any at all.

[@BS-si6pj]

Yes, I tend to try and be like Kiryu from the yakuza games, and I can say it helps with mentality

[@Lnerfan1]

We live in a world where we can't afford to be nice to anyone

[@Chyronn]

True, but we can be compassionate and understanding. The true mark of a man.

[@HenrySomeone]

Precisely, maybe your parents (if they are genuinely good parents) and a couple of closest longtime friends, that's about it.

[@ZacTBH]

the biggest thing for 'nice guys' to understand is their attachment to an outcome is screwing them up big time, because when a person is in that state of mind they operate from a 'scarcity' mindset which never looks good on anybody.

[@tygsv4021]

“Nice guys” need to go through a lot of discomfort & disappointment before they learn. That’s how I learned. But because of all the shit I went through I become cold hearted. Some people will as well.

[@HenrySomeone]

Being cold hearted is an absolute advantage in today's world though, so it's not all bad at all.

[@allezgamingforever]

Maybe this is a good thing. Being this assertive separates the people that are malicious with there trickery and you'll also find the right people too.

[@tubbyrainbow111]

Amen to that.

[@janfg1578]

At 30 years old, I still notice a lot of nice guys behaviour in myself rooted in elementary and middle school times. When you are in the position of a loner at that age, you are likely to loose in conflicts both physically and mentally. That ignites a basic fear of confrontations lasting lifelong. The main problem is that adults never teach children or teenagers these deeper social skills, which is why I`m watching this video as an adult now. One good thing about the internet is that psychological and other helpful stuff is way easier accessible than it was back then.

[@mgbm8335]

Nice Guys need help honestly. Not everything is their fault, so it's weird to kick people while they're down all because they had a unfortunate upbringing that they have to recover from. Problem is, there are 'Nice Guys' that would rather go on a endless loop of no help and stay miserable hoping that somebody would save them and everything will be all sunshine and rainbows.

[@joevollbach4099]

Nice guys need to be kicked, regardless of if we are down or not. They most likely are only down because of their own failures. Some may be that way because of wrongdoings against them, but everyone is responsible for themselves and nobody else. Its naive to think you can help someone so pathetic without kicking them to get them going.

[@williamj.dovejr.8613]

I never bother anyone until they bother me...if someone tries to take advantage of me, I distance myself. If someone talks shit behind my back, I let them know that I know. It wasn't always that easy...it took time and my trust being abused.

[@DawnshieId]

I have no social skills but I face confrontation anyway.

[@Ukiyo69]

Here are a few aspects of the foolishness often associated with nice guys: 1. Transactional Kindness: One common characteristic of nice guys is the expectation of receiving something in return for their kindness. They may believe that by being nice, they are entitled to romantic or sexual attention from others. This transactional mindset undermines the genuine nature of kindness, as true acts of kindness should come from a place of selflessness and not with an expectation of personal gain. 2. Lack of Authenticity: Nice guys often struggle with being authentic and true to themselves. They may put on a façade of agreeableness and accommodation, suppressing their own needs and desires to please others. This lack of authenticity prevents genuine connections from forming, as they are not being true to who they are, and others may sense this insincerity. 3. Seeking Validation: Many nice guys have a strong desire for validation and approval from others. They may seek external validation as a means to boost their self-esteem or feel a sense of worth. This validation-seeking behavior can lead to dependency on others' opinions and neglect of their own self-worth, which is ultimately unsustainable and unsatisfying. 4. Lack of Assertiveness: Nice guys often struggle with assertiveness and setting boundaries. They may have difficulty expressing their needs, wants, and boundaries in fear of rejection or conflict. This can lead to unfulfilled needs and feelings of resentment when their desires are not met. It's important to find a balance between kindness and assertiveness in order to maintain healthy relationships. Overall, the foolishness of nice guys lies in the misconceptions and misguided behaviors they may exhibit. By expecting something in return for their kindness, lacking authenticity, seeking validation externally, and struggling with assertiveness, they may hinder their own personal growth and the development of meaningful relationships. It's important for individuals to reflect on these patterns and strive for genuine connections based on mutual respect, authenticity, and healthy boundaries.

[@stranger45369]

Insightful comment

[@TheColtonStreeter]

What's sad is that this is how being nice is seen by people

[@hafizumar107]

Not only you describe weak men, but you also describe feminism.

[@Buttersnatcher]

"Not only do you describe tomatos but engine oil and hardwood nails". Bro what?

[@carsonmalleet4367]

@@Buttersnatcher here we see the close sibling to the nice guy, the “I hate women women bad Andrew Tate” type. They don’t think they are basically the same person but they are.

[@LvUhcX]

wait what’s wrong with feminism??

[@Hammerhead137]

​@@LvUhcX feminism was designed to destroy the family unit.

[@HenrySomeone]

@@LvUhcX Modern feminism? Better question is what isn't wrong with it...

[@WarriorPrime1]

Excellent video. If I could add a point, it is that many people confuse being "nice" as being "good". they are not the same. A "good" man knows who he is, has boundaries, has a moral framework, takes action and responsibility, is not an ass hole, and is not someone's doormat. "nice" guys dont have these attributes. I know, I use to be one.

[@Stoicism96123]

I agree. A"good" man has self-respect and boundaries and standards. A "nice" guy does for something in return and doesn't have self respect or boundaries at all.

[@DawnshieId]

What you both just described is a neutral man, not a good man. Merely not being an asshole or doormat, is not enough to be considered good. That's just isolationism. In order for a man to truly be *_good,_* he must have a heart filled with genuine caring, he must be willing to lead and be the first one to speak out, he must put others before himself without expecting anything back, not out of niceness but out of love, and he must side with the weak against the powerful, and stand up for everyone's freedom, even when it's hard and unpopular. Remember that good is the opposite of evil, so it must be just as extreme.

[@LeagueofTamilians]

There is no good or evil. It's all in the perspective/point of view. Showing the true character of ourselves will make us isolated. Because it's like a Lion in a group of Hyenas. They will eventually isolate you and frame you as the "Bad" guy because you are not accepting what a group of a**holes agree with.

[@WarriorPrime1]

@@DawnshieId You missed the point of the comment.

[@DawnshieId]

@@WarriorPrime1 You missed the point of life.

[@ch.ristopher.jackson]

I used to be a nice guy. But no longer. I am thankfully no longer a people pleaser.

[@ianchesney9639]

I used to be that guy, sometimes at night I can't go to sleep because sometimes I still think I'm the nice guy and doubt my current frame. It wrecks you the longer you go about life as that nice guy.

[@SuayipEdelli]

This sounds a lot like it's coming from someone who's too angry at his past behaviors. It's all a bunch of bullshit, both what society tells boys to be like, and the polar opposite that "internet redpill bros" advise. Always listen to your gut and do whatever comes naturally. Neither fronting as a phony nice guy - thinking that this makes you a likeable person, nor as a phony harsh psychopath (like the uploader of this crap) - thinking that this makes you appear strong and masculine. Just don't "try". However, do focus on accumulating wealth and maximizing your physical attractiveness. Then people will praise you no matter what you're like. Either for being "a truly good man" if you are kind, or "true alpha/gigachad sexy bad boy" if you are mean. Power/success is all that matters as far as receiving other people's validation goes. It's a false diagnosis to say "you're being pushed around because you're a nice guy", it is doubly wrong to harshly accuse someone for not understanding why he's being persecuted.

[@baronhelmut2701]

"The foolishness of nice guys" is more of a "the foolishness of women to mistake generosity and symbols of appreciation for weakness". Just look at what a woman feels like when her man compliments her after she was insanely mean to him. All of them think this is a weak move. When in reality it goes like this in the mans head: "Seems she doesnt feel well about herself today, what can I say to let her know that everything is ok ?" He is strong because he takes her about as seriously as 30 seconds of a mild breeze inside a snowstorm. Yet womens brains put everything in a way that displays them as strong.

[@KaranKumar-nu1eo]

Emotionally immature women are bloody idiots and are a pain to deal with. Best course of action is to leave the harpy when she starts her tirade.

[@just_some_bigfoot_hacking_you]

This comment sums it all.

[@leonrobinson8180]

I'm on the woman's side here. If she's mean to you, you should stand up for yourself. You being nice to her comes off as begging. If you can't stand up to a woman, you can't stand up for her.

[@baronhelmut2701]

@@leonrobinson8180 as I mentioned. In the guys head this situation feels like getting attacked by a toddler. I dont need to defend myself if I never felt threatened in the first place. I would much rather solve the root of the problem of getting attacked than pretend to go batshit crazy over a person that doesn’t even know what words to say thatd hurt me.

[@baronhelmut2701]

@@leonrobinson8180 as I mentioned. In the guys head this situation feels like getting attacked by a toddler. I dont need to defend myself if I never felt threatened in the first place. I would much rather solve the root of the problem of getting attacked than pretend to go batshit crazy over a person that doesn’t even know what words to say thatd hurt me.

[@BekirO]

I woke up a few years ago dude. the problem is, I don't know how to be a decent human being. How can someone learn basic social skills over 40? I am not angry to anyone but myself. I am responsible all of my mistakes. only solution I could find is, to isolate myself for the sake of mankind and myself.

[@themistics6954]

With faith in god all is possible

[@ddm9975]

Seems like the solution to not be a loser is being an Egocentric Egoist . Like if ignoring what others ppl think would Bring more money and luck. Keep spread this mentality , world need more Wars and Chaos. The worst thing about all of this is reading comments saying “ I was a good guy but now I’m finally a bad guy “ Seems becoming a Lord of the Sith is valuable goal in life.

[@allezgamingforever]

You only have to be cold hearted if someone is stepping on you. Other than that you'll still be cool with everyone. I guess this is the way in today's times.

[@palmtree5489]

This is exactly how i felt a month ago. Im a slight overweight normie, with little to no self esteem, but since about a month ago im trying to change my life around, im going more outside, im taking care of myself, im going to the gym. im solely focused on myself. Note that ive never did Sport, im like completely out of shape, if you can run more than 3 minutes your outperforming me. i was a smoker, smoked a pack of cigs per day, ive stopped since she left me. i got left by a girl about a month ago, at first i was depressed and mentally broken down, but now i can feel the Power, the Anger, the Hate that i build inside myself, because i wasnt the man i should be, i wasnt the man i wanted to be. But now is the fucking time im changing MY life. i can release all this power into myself to smite the new me, the better me. The Person who i want to be. The Best Version of Myself. When youre at your lowest theres 2 Options. Either you Stand up, and Fight your Demons till Heaven or you Die like a coward on the ground.

[@tubbyrainbow111]

Get into boxing with a proper mentor and train for a fight. Trust me lad, it helps. It'll give you what you are looking for.

[@colshapedbutter8655]

People only care about your sad stories if you have a happy ending. if you suffer, you can blame both yourself and the world but if you do not have the discipline or motivation to be better then your life will be bitter

[@simont6439]

I'd say this is not a description of nice guys, but of weak nice guys. There are also strong nice guys, and people who can modulate according to the circumstances. There are really two separate continuums, Strength which goes from weak to strong, and Niceness, which goes from nice to bully. Then there is capacity of modulation attached to both those continuums.

[@MnK32]

He's bitter

[@Chris-ou2zp]

Maybe the nice guys the only reason god hasn't given up on the world yet

[@hafizumar107]

But then again, women will use the term "nice guy" on you when they think you are not suitable for them in particular, although in general you have no attributes of a nice guy. Since you have no attributes of a nice guy, you can tell her to gtfo and move on. It's her loss. 😎😎😎😎

[@farmertiga4983]

How to not be Nice Guys: Be with yourself and seek for inner-peace. Contrary to popular belief that humans are social creatures, we in essence are individual beings. Our happiness came from contentment.

[@jackalope2302]

What if validation is what makes you content

[@Chyronn]

Humans are social creatures AND individual beings, both are true. Seek what makes YOU content.

[@Hellna255]

​​​​@@jackalope2302 Probably a miserable life if your contentment depend on others validation. Peope always wont appreciate your kindness or success.😐

[@jackalope2302]

@@Hellna255 it can be. I can't figure out how to self love.

[@Hellna255]

@@jackalope2302 your mind is not at peace if you can't love yourself. Usually overstimulation is the cause of that!

[@person8834]

I think most people go through this phase at least before they hit 10-11 years old. It’s a pretty normal phase. Unfortunately, some people don’t complete this phase until they’re grown ass adults.

[@stranger45369]

You are right. I was in this phase till 16-17 years old.

[@saintoflastresorts2272]

Maybe the "nice" guys you know the ones I know are nice to themselves and treat themselves with respect

[@Josephextreme]

This is why I don't call myself nice anymore. I call myself mature.

[@Chyronn]

Another word for "old"

[@Josephextreme]

@@justchill5628 because nice guys have a bad reputation, so I just avoid the word all together. You gotta adjust to play and win in the game of dating.

[@ThemnewKrispys]

How about instead of telling good men to act like corrupt men, We stop allowing women to freely choose corrupt men to sit the next generation of humans. There is nothing AT ALL wrong with being kind, humble or meek, these are qualities. Just because women are attracted to animalistic behaviour doesn't mean men should devolve to accommodate their stupidity. Stop thinking with your small head and move in away that leverages the power away from women and outs it back in the hands of the providers and protectors, the men everyone needs to survive.

[@carloa877]

Thanks for this video. It reminded me of my old self, then I gained enough self confidence and became a man.

[@chrisbetts4605]

Being nice has never worked so I pretty much just do what I want to don’t give a shit about people‘s feelings or the consequences

[@DawnshieId]

You don't see any difference between love and fear.

[@soursewer3279]

I was this guy, this video is like a mirror to my past self... BRUTAL

[@rAnd0mTr0ll]

I wish there was specific examples instead of leaving it to the imagination. Honest work should be rewarded and helping people on the job should build strength but nope, your reward is more work and your co workers mock you. I quickly stopped being so helpful and they bitch about it. People. I do unto others but no one reciprocates. I really believe it's American culture because I've been overseas and people are more decent. They believe in saving others from embarrassment instead of one upping them.

[@Crazycoyote-we7ey]

The nice guy act only works if you want to be a floor mat Be an @$$ho13 it's more fun and easy

[@knockhello2604]

Yup. That's how humans are supposed to be

[@KyranSparda]

No one is truly 'nice'. There's always a button to push, and females & bullies know how to push your good guy's button. Don't ever, pull the nice guy card, that's like challenging them to snatch it from you and defecate on it just to show you that they're better/superior than you. The key to become a leading person in your own life is to harness both the good & evil in you. You strive to be good, but at the same time, you will not doubt to say no and unleash hell if your lines are crossed. Like Dr. Jordan Peterson said, do not confuse harmless with good, harmless is just weakness. Good is the ability to do absolute evil but having the will power to control/harness it. That effort is what makes a man worthy. You think Antlia the Hun, Alexander the Great, Genghis Khan, King Leonidas became great men by being 'nice'? Exactly. There's good king, then there's bad king, but there's never a 'nice' king. A good king is loved and respected, but at the same time, also has the ability to intimidate & destroy when the time calls for it. So that his domain may not get violated by the ill-willed. Remember that. 1. Don't be a SIMP. 2. When lines are crossed, a no is a no. Have standards. 3. You can be "cannot fight", but don't be "won't fight".

[@danielboucher9819]

This vidéo is not harsh it's the reality of today's living thank's for shearing love you're direct approach let stop putting are head in the sand manifest ourselves 👍

[@MC-kk8xu]

This hits hard. I struggle with this. -I used to beg for womens validation and attention but thankfully not now. More other way round. Id be lying if I said my simp behaviour doesnt come to the surface at times though. -Used to people please, now I dont people please as such but I still struggle setting boundaries. -Still at times act fake to fit in with other guys. -Still avoid conflict like the plague. But honestly since 2020 I have grown bit more of a backbone. Im not perfect by any means, I still am scared but have at least improved. -Still procrastinate A LOT. I have improved a lot and respect myself more, but I still display a lot of these behaviours. I find it very difficult to shake off. I have tried a lot of different things which have helped, but in my experience the wake up for me was realizing the ulimate truly "nice" thing you can do in life is to love and accept yourself. When you learn to love and accept yourself, then you no longer are desperate for others to love and accept you. And when I say love and accept yourself I dont mean accept as in "Oh I'm weak, lazy, fat, undisciplined and poor... guess I should just love and accept it". A serenity prayer I know sums it up well - I mean truly loving and accepting yourself knowing that you have the power to change things, but also loving and accepting that there are things you cannot change, and loving and accepting that with wisdom and learning you will see the difference. To anyone who feels like the "Nice guy" described in the video - I understand. I know how it feels and I still act this way a lot. But we have hope to become better. ❤

[@harmhoeks5996]

"raised by women to please women" Good points.

[@5persondude]

I used to be like this for the majority of my life. Total doormat from a *very* young age. Only recently have I begun to really try and rebuild my self-esteem and confidence. I only have one question to ask: what’s a good way or example to gauge my confidence and self-esteem in a healthy and practical way? I wouldn’t say it’s “easy”, but thinking about stuff like this in the safety of my own head seems far less challenging than putting my confidence to the test in the real world. Additionally, I don’t want to fall into the “Sigma Male/Alpha Male” trap of just being an a**hole or selfish monster towards everyone.

[@MrNamenamenamename]

Okay, but why did my parents raise me like this my whole life and no one told me. Not until i saw my psychologist did I finally undo these things. Why is it bad for me to have been that way in the past but okay for others to exploit it. At least I had one friend that told me about the deceptive niceness and actually helped me change. What about the rest of the people who didn't.

[@Impalingthorn]

Frankly I hate how frequently misused and misunderstood these terms have become. An "Alpha" isn't the biggest "chad" or "***hole" in the room, it is the person with the greatest leadership and experience based qualities that ALLOWS other people to depend on them and defer to them in times of need. It is NOT an assessment to how many b*tches they "pull". Likewise, a "Simp" isn't some nobody who's defining characteristic is that they put their hard work, love, blood and effort towards someone else. They're someone deferring unnecessarily TO that person. Simps get made fun of because of their mishandling of priorities and you can fix THAT in a snap of the fingers if you can simply talk yo that person the right way. And "Incels"... Christ, I hate what the internet and thots specifically have done to this word. It went from "involuntarily celibate" to "I disagree with this guy and I PERSONALLY don't find him that attractive so I'm just gonna say he gets no puss". Then these same women wonder why they can't find a "decent guy". Incels are generally just people with bad habits and lifestyle choices, they aren't beyond changing things. Why are we so determined to tear down everyone around us? Mind you, when I say "Thots, I am talking about people with no real world experience living in their own little hedonistic bubble who put down others for petty reasons and talk trash about other's sex lives just because they have the behavioral patterns of a street hooker. It's not in reference to all women. When as I use that term, it is in the vein of addressing the fact that they criticize others unjustly. We should be encouraging people to be the best versions of themselves that they can be, not trying to rip their confidence and hope to shreds and tear them down just so we have a competitive edge over them in the dating market.

[@MrNamenamenamename]

Dont tell me i never wanted the right thing. I always wanted it. I simply got tired of waiting for others to do the right thing and that let me set better boundaries.

[@alfasiger4178]

my major issue is even if I stand up for myself, it always backfires. resulting in me being forced to be a pushover. its as if nothing in the universe flows in my favor.

[@lukebruce5234]

Didn't watch but there is nothing wrong with being nice. Their problem is clearly looks. Nice guys don't finish last, ugly guys do.

[@ldude3662]

This font mean you turn into a absolute dochebag of a human. This video is supposed to tell you that your niceness ismt gonna help. Be selfish and egostical, but also selfless and compassionate, FOR THOSE WHO ARE DESERVING. If you give away parts of yourself for validation, you will die inside. Pick your friends carefully, dont become a doormat for love. Build connections, stand your moral ground. Say No more times. Some resistance is better than a joke of a human who follows orders like a dog. All in all, respect yourself and love yourself rather than seeking that from others.

[@nutsachey]

3:08 fuck...... needa change that fr

[@shaheemjackson283]

Gentlemen, there's a difference between being a "nice guy" and being a "nice person".... Nice guys (or gals) gain validation and their sense of self via external sources. Whereas, a nice person actively seeks to make others around them feel appreciated, loved and cared for because thats their character and they aim to receipriocate that vibe towards people they come in contact with.

[@TheOis1984]

it took me 6 years 2 relationships to wake me up from Nice Guy way of thinking. Only finally when I respected myself I was able to form a healthy relationship with a woman that's now my wife.

[@ronobrush3207]

Fuck me !! I ant gonna lie. Most of the time or maybe all the time I am all of that. All that you said is and feels true. Wow!... got to get my shit together. Tnx for reminding me and showing me what I have to work on now.

[@Efexpe]

Dont be a degenerate. Its not worth it.

[@wagnessfletcher]

Be nice to people. But remember when to be firm and say no when required

[@Snow.Frostborne_Ch]

I always say, don't settle being a nice guy instead strive to be a good man

[@HenrySomeone]

That can be similarly dead end. You should just avoid being a complete asshole, but other than that, you should be putting your interests first.

[@tubbyrainbow111]

Stems from childhood trauma and an absollute shit father or no father at all. Getting this stuff instilled in you as a kid is a gift. I know a millionaire's son and the way he was brought up was so different from me. He had all the right things instilled in him from birth so now it's just his baseline. Discipline, consistency, time management, energy management, social skills and the funds to bak him. Basically life handed to him. Where as my poor dad thought me follow your feelings, people please, be a wage slave, you are worthless, watch television, eat shit food........basically set up to fail at life God really does have favorites man.

[@zanewakeup]

Nice parody, since you think the universe is a cosmic joke, lol

[@BJMProductions]

I wanna send this to a friend but i think it will a bit offending for him If this comme t hits 10 likes Ill send it😂👍🏻📲

[@AmirGTR]

I was reminded recently what horrible shit comes out of being a nice guy. Truth is I made an exception for someone. Never again.

[@HenrySomeone]

Yeah, I occasionally do this on a small scale just to remind myself that staying ice cold towards almost everyone is the way to go. Almost without failure even the smallest gestures of niceness are taken advantage of.

[@aoryu555]

@@HenrySomeone What makes you assume your experience is an example of humanity as a whole?

[@AmirGTR]

@@aoryu555 I wondered the same thing. It obviously exemplifies a particular archetype, but given more thought I can safely say it doesn't represent all people. Being a nice person is good, but being committed to being nice - no matter what - is when things take a wrong turn.

[@aoryu555]

@@AmirGTR There is no such thing as "Committed to being nice no matter what" Nice is an adjective that means 'subtly pleasant' and pleasantries are subjective.

[@77dongle]

As a relatively wealthy, socially adjusted 35 y/o with a great partner and great friendships and a great life generally, it’s really sad to imagine all the men who feel they need this kind of advice to be fulfilled. There’s obviously a problem with young men not achieving good lives- but advice like this video is absurd and is only relevant within an echo chamber of lonely unfulfilled men. Be nice and loyal to people. You will come out on top, I guarantee it.

[@marshallpeters3853]

Not everyone is as lucky as you being surrounded with good people. Most people are surrounded by malicious opportunists, especially the middle to lower class. People with no self esteem and boundaries, whose parents are unavaliable, those who are too nice & loyal out of desperation to be accepted, can easily be taken advantage of

[@sasquatchsiosaurus]

Just gotta be open to making choices with uncertain outcomes, as opposed to always trying to get it right. And then whatever happens, learn from it. It's a scary thing to face if you've lived most of your life seeking perfection. The thing that makes a "nice guy's" life so miserable is that perfection is unattainable. It's a paradox. In trying to be perfect to everyone, you sacrifice too much and end up being accidentally imperfect. It's much better, and a way more exciting way to live, if you're consciously imperfect - that is, open to trying new things, without knowing if it's gonna work out or not. Imperfection is authenticity.

[@mrkm8436]

Much respect to you and your comments!

[@tjsmith5276]

6:08 That sure hit hard 😂😂😂 No thank you, I'd rather be alone and simulate intimacy with a well-endowed 10 or something 😂😂😂.

[@ChiDante]

Interesting to hear it like that. Although there are some bad rooted beliefs behind those words , it's needed to be said. Unlike a lot of conflict avoidant enablers who literally go into panic mode for 'saying like it is'

[@OpEditorial]

This feels very rehearsed in front of a mirror while applying clown make-up

[@dabyseka]

Only truth hear. Do you need it in a short format? (I will edit it for free)

[@michael7144]

Preaching the opposite of the bible makes you what?

[@joevollbach4099]

A scientist? An anti christ? A screaming traffic cone wearing a rat as a hat? Oh wait, i know! An onion! Wait, that's not quite right.

[@michael7144]

@@joevollbach4099 if only you knew the bible..

[@zaidaliahmed7869]

watching this video made me realize something, that I'm not one xD thought i might be because i often care for ppl and try to be nice to them but i don't usually expect a reward tbh

[@jaypetz]

Being a nice guy is not rewarding people will abuse your kindness. So know who is worth your time then move on.

[@dsweet5859]

Fuck being the ‘nice guy’ I’d rather be the good guy.

[@Ranall75]

Haha, I have been dabbling in self-improvement videos since KZbin’s algorithm seems to think I enjoy them. …and Your deadpan delivery and quality takes and well-thought-out perspectives are the best in the game. sorry im not trying to be a nice guy

[@johncarlogenavia2105]

I was just like that before I read Bible and know God more through Jesus Christ.

[@anthonyteichroeb917]

the difference between a "nice" person and a good one boils down to motivation when nobody is watching. End of Story. Add in a component of wisdom and you'll get a "good guy" thats not interested in 99.99999% of conflict or opinions, because they understand that casting their pearls before swine is a meaningless pursuit. "what is this discussion worth in 5 minutes? 1 hour? 2 weeks?" probably not worth getting your panties in a knot. I have bigger things to worry about.... not worry about whats dumber, chickens, turkeys, or you.

[@Chyronn]

"End of story." And proceeds to write about chickens and turkeys. Good one.

[@timothyacker8686]

Deep down, I'm a real asshole.

[@mustysmells817]

People don't understand that being nice =/= being kind. Truly kind people are very rare and people will naturally gravitate to them. You will know a truly kind person when you meet them. The fact that "nice guys" feel bitter at all is the actual reason why they finish last all the damn time, because they should.

[@gisar.6539]

Learn to be manipulative, harden your heart and become opportunistic. Don’t make friends for the sake of making friends. If someone doesn’t add any value to your life in any way - you have no reason to be around each other. We all use each other as humans and altruism doesn’t exist

[@ghost0035]

All he is saying is true

[@ChiDante]

How nice of you

[@Verårtu]

What is true? How come what he said is true?... is it because of observation from others and why it becomes true?... is it because it's wrong? then what is wrong?... is it because it becomes bad things then........... I'll stop.

[@Verårtu]

but to be honest I really want to know, how come things become true?

[@ChiDante]

@@Verårtu that's a secret but what will help you get closer to truth is not trying to conquer truth. Rather devote yourself to Truth. Truth is a name. And it's a her. Commit yourself to Truth more than being "right". And it will reveal itself to you in time

[@Yusa_Beach]

​@@ChiDanteWhats with the riddles

[@gibransaliba8801]

Mr Nice Guy can also quickly turn aggressive, weird and creepy if he feels that he has something (almost always trivial) to lose. Always be wary of people being over the top nice to you. Pimps can be really sweet and nice first and once the 304 falls for their charms they use brute force until the 304 gets smart enough to teach him a lesson or worse

[@erenyeeagah204]

i used to be like that but it wasnt really for a reward it was just to be accepted, my self image and selfesteem was so low i couldnt imagine people doing things for me and didnt think i deserve it. i never really had any alterior motive or malicious intent. I guess i was more of a people pleaser than a nice guy.

[@Mindbender55]

Thanks for being harsh on these weak men!

[@mcmlxciseaton8651]

I just watched your video on a man becoming heartless and decided to check the page. Only to see a new upload one hour ago. I like your content, it rings true for a lot of men and ppl in general.

[@thelawyer95]

Yo exactly how I found his content. I'm pretty much the cold man he talks about, so it interested me.

[@abdulsami5085]

Fuck ahahahahhahahahahha brutal honest shit man

[@shlukster_v2]

People need to know difference between nice and kind, they got it mixed almost every time. I'm not talking about man who made this video, because he clearly know difference

[@DoppyTheElv]

Seeing as these kinds of people, who you belittlingly call nice guys, are probably in need of therapy and are in a bad place mentally. The video leaves a bad taste in my mouth. Sad that you use this medium to bully vulnerable people in order to feel more masculine (?) yourself.

[@joevollbach4099]

Well, being gentle sure as shit won't help. Some guys need therapy, but first, they need to wake up and realize something wrong and later decide how to go through changing themselves. I think this video accomplishes what it's set to do.

[@DoppyTheElv]

@@joevollbach4099 I never spoke about being gentle. There is a thing called constructive criticism, and this video is not that by a long shot. Don't pretend to care about these individuals you belittle because it's obviously just thinly veiled hate. This video set out to belittle and ostracize "nice guys". It indeed accomplished that given all these comments.

[@joevollbach4099]

@DoppyTheElv "i never spoke about being gentle." That was me jumping to conclusions there, my bad. You're also right on the video, not being constructive criticism. And it all seems (to me, at least) to be an angry wake-up call to other people due to his frustrations with how he used to behave. So, while i surrender your point that this isnt constructive criticism, id also like to point out that he is right on how many of us do not have good intentions and are not to be trusted, and how that combined with our other approval seeking traits, will leave us to lose everything in the end. I still think this video is a way to point out problems to those of us who may not entirely realise the consequences of these behaviors, and to directly call out those of us that do inderstand, and that even if no solution is given, the points are laid out as we need to hear them in a deliberately harsh way to try and kick people into action. But maybe you're right. he and i are just angry and hateful. i dont think we are as much of victims as people seem to believe, though.

[@Dany-nt6dn]

Trying being kind, not "nice". Most of times that is hypocrisiy

[@sawyertuide7636]

I think some people have the opposite problem They have their own opinions, own authentic ways but want to force/vocalize it upon others on the idea that they will rally behind them and love them. A man with ideas is a madman until his ideas triumph yes, but also your ideas will only attract those willing. And in your home area, few will support because you are to them your worst self.

[@jeremybrown4489]

In my journey to change from an antisocial criminal into a good person I went the nice guy route for a while and ended up resenting myself and everyone else for it... it's a dark tunnel.

[@MyAirsoftRealm]

Yeah, I guess that that's me, I already knew that I failed life, but some of the harsher 'truths' still seem foreign to me...can't stop lying to myself now though!

[@JamesR-f9l]

I get put into the "nice guy" category. My real persona is that of a loner and I am moderately successful scavenging what I can so can appear "normal" enough to feed the success. I don't usually get the desert ,but I change my relationship to pain and go after the meat. I try to be true to myself. I realize for example that I don't in general like women, but just very specific women and I embrace the pain of their rejection because of what it makes me become. So many people are afraid of being called loser, yet I have completely dropped out of society. So beneath my projection of nice guy I am fearless, resilient, and exceptionally mentally tough. I also don't mind listening to the saddest beta songs every day ,because my relationships are nil and I am unscathed. I am married(only relationship), have a decent job, and just bought my second home.

[@vizardonator8571]

I have some pretty strange opinions at times, but if I strongly disagree with a point I’ll break my mental silence. I don’t want to start fights, but I have integrity. That being said, if I’m in a situation of low stakes like a game and someone is making the odds better for them, I will do things to make it even easier without giving up, and will only be a little subtle, to rob them of the enjoyment of their victory. If they’re going to be an a-hole, they don’t deserve satisfaction.

[@psyche1988]

AI generated crap.

[@Janon743]

I bet I’m regurgitating the video but I’d already agree if you covered this point: The problem is a lot of “nice guys” will believe their good behavior will get them rewarded, and the reality that your good deeds will often not be recognized causes many to become embittered, incel, what have you. A truly kind and good person does the right thing regardless of whether or not they’re getting the attention, rewards, what have you that they want. They do the right thing because they believe in it. Someone who has that kind front as a means to be rewarded, then drops it when things don’t go their way, was never genuinely kind or nice in the first place.. nice guys(like the legit nice people) don’t finish last, “nice guys” finish last

[@mihirshinde1706]

but what is the solution, you berated us but where is the solution

[@RainbowBandana]

Man the hell up that's the reward weakling

[@Verårtu]

Thing is you have to find your own answer... cliché yeah. The solution is your mindset what do you think of what he said... Make your own observations then SEE and FEEL. Solutions comes from you what you do every single day... Although you see no solutions in this video, I see a lot lots of solutions... weird feels but it connects I can't really point out the solution but it's there and all I need to do is to make more connection.

[@thelawyer95]

Be evil

[@Josephextreme]

Just be yourself and voice your opinions.

[@vurhn2009]

Just be ru- I mean improving on yourself.

[@rhettoric5796]

This video should've been longer. It should've included the paragraphs that are in the video's description. Because otherwise it just sounds like you're saying what's wrong with nice guys in a memeable, non-serious way. The 304 line really made me question if you're trying to help these nice guys change or just make fun of them.

[@michaelmccormack494]

Holy shit! It ain't a mistake for me. Amor fati, baby, 'and he who doesn't believe that, to his toes, would do better to remain silent'...-- Dahlberg Be who you are, men. Ask no quarter. Comport and deport exactly the way you are & want to. Any other advice is baloney...