The Link Between Anger and Vulnerability

In this episode, Teal Swan reveals the truth about anger and vulnerability that will change your perspective and your life. She explains how anger is a cover emotion that protects us from feeling vulnerable feelings such as fear, pain, and powerlessness.
She also shows us how to recognize, see, hear, feel, and attend to the vulnerability underneath our anger and the anger of others. By doing this, we can resolve the root cause of our anger and create more harmony and healing in our lives. Watch this episode to learn how to heal your anger by facing your vulnerability.
👉 Listen Out For:
- Anger is a cover emotion that protects us from vulnerable feelings
- Anger is a strategy that we learned in dysfunctional family dynamics
- Anger is linked to a protector part within us that feels self-loyal
- Anger can be healed by attending to the vulnerability underneath it
- Anger can be transformed by resolving the fear, pain, and powerlessness that it covers
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👉 Who Is Teal Swan?
Teal Swan is a New Thought Leader, Bestselling Author, and Speaker. She was born with a range of extrasensory abilities and is a survivor of severe childhood abuse. Today she uses her gifts as well as her own harrowing life experience to inspire millions of people towards authenticity, freedom, and joy and teaching people how to transform their emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual pain.
The result when people are restored to wholeness is that the world will be restored to wholeness. Teal Swan's teachings invite people to step fully into their authenticity, knowing that this will bring about the positive change that we want to see in the world.
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Beginning and Ending Song:
Teal Swan Intro by Christian De Raco

[@fluentinoverthinking]

I’d been suppressing anger my whole life until I got to the therapy. I developed a lot of tension in my body and some psychosomatic issues. When my therapist explained that I had been living life as an animal whose teeth were removed so it can’t bite I started crying because this was the best description of me someone has ever given. Moreover, I couldn't ever growl and was pleasing people all day long, all year round. I feel blessed to recognize it so early on in my life (I’m in my 20s) and I hope to stop this vicious circle of trauma in our family. Mental health awareness is extremely important. If someone is in doubts whether to start therapy, don't hesitate! It will drastically improve your life.

[@vanessak7069]

Some therapy is retraumatising, some therapists are dangerous so be aware, glad you had good results

[@gill426]

I'm so glad someone else is saying this out loud. There's so much heavy abuse in therapy and there are many therapists that are a terribly detrimental influence.

[@vanessak7069]

@@gill426 I was hit on verbally by my therapist multiple times when I was recovering from sexual abuse. He was 30 years older. He said I have an erotic aura and wanted to touch me. Just one negative example. Do not trust peoples recommendations, always.... ALWAYS be careful.

[@erasetheyears]

I can relate so much to your story since I was also brought up to be the perfect princess who never got angry and never fought back, except no one else protected me either. I'm so glad you found a therapist who is helping! And that you found your way to Teal who has helped me more than any therapist I have tried. Cheers to our healing journey!

[@nwunnoticewhatyounotice6136]

@@vanessak7069I'm so sorry you went through that. That's disgusting. And not at all about you (edit: rather it's showing what type of person they are), so don't make it mean anything negative about you!!!

[@narutoli394]

I actually as an adult tried to communicate my fears and vulnerabilities and how i feel with my family but they made me regret it by throwing all those vulnerabilities at my face during arguments. Now i do not know what to do.

[@anastassia5822]

I'm sorry you've been mistreated in this way

[@samscarletta7433]

Not everybody deserves to sit at your table. Not even family.

[@zion367]

The trick is to accept your own vulnerabilities fully. If you do that then you take their ammunition away. Do you get what I mean? How can they ever use something against you to hurt you if you already accept it 😉

[@narutoli394]

@@anastassia5822 Thank you!

[@captainman2clever351]

Find people who come give you what you need.

[@annikabirgittanordlander6887]

”We need to feel as though we live in a social environment where our pain (such as hurt, fear, powerlessness and vulnerability) matters”. Teal Swan 🌎 thank you Teal 😘

[@carlranger8060]

This Woman is wise beyond her years.

[@wannabeskinnylegend5645]

The synchronicity of this video is impeccable

[@ramdino6310]

Right there with you my friend.

[@v.958]

Teal knows it 😉

[@GreyRock100]

I was addicted to anger for a long time. I've worked on it for a couole years now.

[@erasetheyears]

A Course in Miracles says there are only 2 real emotions, love and fear. I understand that concept so much better now because of this video. Thank you Teal!

[@thelotus3]

You just affirmed 4 years of my life, I was about to write myself off as a lunatic. Thank you

[@monikadeinbeck4760]

in the example he falling asleep when she tells him about her worries also seems to be a trauma reaction. he has learned to withdraw from stressful situations by freezing, falling asleep or dissociation. perhaps he grew up in a family where there was a lot of fighting. So her violent urge for connection causes his passive aggressive withdrawal. it's a trauma bond between them.

[@Damons-Old-Soul]

The other possibility is that he had a very long day and is exhausted. She (in the example) would have chosen a bad time to engage with him about what is going on. I have personally been in both situations. I have been exhausted as well as disengaging due to my own background growing up.

[@alex-ander-13]

@@Damons-Old-Soul Good point.

[@WithoutNarcissism]

When others are angry it is not usually at us but at the pain we may have caused, usually by reinjuring a preexisting wound again. So I have learned to react to that blizzard of rage from an angry person completely neutral (not a smile or a frown, those are defensive strategies that usually incites more anger), and to invite them to tell me how to help them make the pain go away. This puts me in a centered space where I can react from my wisdom and speak from that space. This doesn't offend them nor threaten them, and they usually can then go towards asking for the help they need. Then in this space of calm neutrality I can see if they are trying to help stop the pain that has caused them to be angry, or are actually trying to attack, control, or gaslight.

[@destroyraiden]

Yep I'm learning that if I'm angry and it's within my POV (as they keep telling me I'm angry all the time yet I don't feel it so there maybe a disconnection to my anger yet they could also just be saying that) so if I'm aware of my anger & I'm ready to rage on them I ask instead what are they hitting inside of me? Chances are high I can find what it is now so I don't need to rage at them as in alot of cases it's something that isn't a present/present but a present vs past situation. In the rare case they're doing something that I can't find in my childhood and it's a true new wound & insult that was made right now or at least last week then I can see what is the emotions under the rage anyhow though I find these present vs present ones harder to cool down I still have lots of emotions it seems but they feel like a hot wall which heat = fear and I take way longer to understand what is happening as its multi dimensional it seems. Same with anxiety and fear someone hit something inside you so deducing what it is, when you last felt it, then how far in your past did you feel it can very much help though I also do emotional release healing as well so if I trace the pain point back to I was in the womb & it's mine I can release it.

[@trippssey]

But that's the thing about our own childhood trauma, is that we kind of cause our own pain; by having flashbacks or triggers from things other people say or do right? Like they can take responsibility but only partly because we have to take responsibility for our reactions assumptions and feelings towards what other people say, do or don't. Assuming it's what is most common which is that people aren't trying to cause us pain they end up being the trigger.

[@WithoutNarcissism]

Yes, we cause how we feel about stuff so we are the ones that can change it all.@@trippssey

[@WithoutNarcissism]

True, owning an issue or trauma doesn't necessarily mean keeping it and hanging on to it, it can mean releasing it. Because it is yours, you have that power.@@destroyraiden

[@user-bz9if2hl9q]

It is true that hurt people hurt people.

[@Swedensureiscold]

Teal is a rockstar thought leader! So grateful for her well articulated, much useful perspectives. 🙏

[@tammywoslager1557]

Incredible, thank you!

[@echoes8]

Everytime I listen I am more n more memorized by her intelligence. Teal has made such an impact to my soul, my parenting, relationships through the years. I really hope as time goes by more people become more aware. I have watched many therapists podcasts gurus ted talks etc no one has ever compared. Most beautiful soul💜

[@TealSwanOfficial]

Incase you'd Rather Read About It Instead: tealswan.com/resources/articles/the-link-between-anger-and-vulnerability-r588/

[@Damons-Old-Soul]

Please make the video on the partner sleeping.

[@dishundajohnson7787]

I need the video about checking out. I always feel, why waste the energy of getting angry. I shutdown and physically leave the situation, and just engage in something positive. I now see that person as no help to me emotionally. I'll still engage with that person in other things, but never emotionally. I truly didn't realize this came from early trauma until watching these videos 😢.

[@shaktiveda7041]

Hi Teal, you are absolutely right, I needed to hear this conversation. I like how you went all the way back to childhood to describe what might have happened to cause such violent and intense reactions, and the feeling of betrayal of the self and the need to draw boundaries to make sure it won't happen again...that anger snaps so fast that it makes extremely difficult to go underneath it in an exploring mode...only later, after the fact, there's always a movie replay showing me what I could have done or said instead...However, by studying Human Design I learnt that when confronted with someone with a Defined Root Chakra I feel very pressured in a sort of competitive way. Thank you!

[@flying_like_a_heroine]

Yes anger is a smoke screen. A Naracisstic mother where anger was my way of protecting my gentle beautiful sensitive soul that she constantly violated ridiculed and took advantage of and gaslit. Then the anger was the problem and gave more fuel for abuse. I was the scapegoat. Cut the whole family off now and working on my anger - it's actually easier now because I have less need to protect myself. Thank you ❤

[@ukraineisthecapitaloffreed3886]

True, i saw when child tried hold its tears and got angry 😟 i felt really sorry for him that moment 😢

[@JuliosStudio]

I needed this video ten years ago. But I’m grateful that I have it now. It’s never too late to begin to heal and change. ❤ thank you for helping understand a part of myself that is so deep rooted.

[@genejam]

Teal is a national treasure ❤

[@difficulttofindauniqueusername]

It seems like this video was made for me. Never have I felt this understood at core level.

[@lilyevangelus6392]

I can totally relate. People always complain about “my anger issues” and it took me a long time, and I mean a long time to understand that anger is actually a response to something. I took all the blame for my anger, for years. You don’t know how painful that is, to accept the blame and be the bad guy most of my life. Because I got angry. And the most painful thing to realize, is that not many people have the patience and the empathy and the love to give me the space to process whatever happens underneath all that anger. Those kind of people have their own issues and they are not worth my time. It is said that if they can’t handle my worst then they don’t deserve my best, right? And some closed doors are better stayed closed.

[@lucymziri1130]

❤

[@andrew5222]

did you have that same empathy for others that you claim you wanted from others? often people are oblivious to their own lack of the same behaviors they expect from others

[@lilyevangelus6392]

@@andrew5222 Why do you assume I always want something when I get angry?

[@user-wm2fv3sp3x]

Everybody has issues to deal with. It is important to recognize that we are all fighting in some battles and dealing with the challenges of life. And we feel we need to be this strong person, covering up our vulnerabilities and hence suffering pain. This, in fact, is the common ground that can join us together and hence have empathy and compassion for each other, without which there will be no understanding. It is really sad that when you opened up yourself and told people about your pain, which was not an easy thing to do and required courage, it fell on deaf ears. This actually brought you the ultimate pain, the feeling that you were like totally on your own and no one cared and understood. I guess the lesson here is that we have to be more careful in selecting the people we show our vulnerabilities and revealing our pain. Some people simply lack sensitivity and empathy for you because they don't have that for themselves.

[@lilyevangelus6392]

@@user-wm2fv3sp3x ❤️❤️❤️

[@mariageorge7462]

My family have pushed me out as I spoke the truth about my older brother whom now is 60 . He has lied to his own gain and made my life a living hell whilst I have battled my cancer twice ( now cancer free ) nursed my dad who. Passed 3 years ago and my mum whom was my best friend I thought has sided with him and his son .. my hearts been broken. My mum cried to my friends and I’m allowed back if I accept marks nasty ness and selfish ways as he has said we are all dying not just you !! ❤

[@armylrs2391]

I spend all of my time alone so my anger and frustration arises when simple everyday things go wrong. This video covers anger as it pertains to relationships and communicating with others, but I need help with getting angry at stupid unimportant things. It's really starting to affect my life, it's scaring me a bit.

[@spacesandy3410]

I get what you mean. Maybe it's a coded response, in other words - "when I was a child, I was often scolded for making even the tiniest of mistakes. If I have made a mistake (something has gone wrong), I preempt external punishment by immediately punishing myself instead". Like a learned habit, if that makes sense? Almost as though it's better to self-destruct first than be knocked down by someone else:) this was my personal experience. Sometimes it manifested in anger, sometimes in tears, because it's almost as though I was expecting to be yelled at (even if I was alone or with a partner who obviously couldn't have yelled at me in my childhood).

[@moon.feather]

Thank you Teal Swan. This video helped me so much. From watching this video, I realized a lot of my bad habits and fights in relationships have happened because I was raised in a dysfunctional family. I like how Teal Swan explained, if I acknowledge anger as covering up feeling emotionally vulnerable because there is a fear of rejection that I experienced as a child (when my emotional needs were not met), I can now deconstruct my anger because I understand it is a defense mechanism. I would like to emphasize how valuable it is to be mindful and see anger as an illusion cast by someone generating a defense mechanism so they do not get rejected and hurt while they are emotionally vulnerable. If you deeply understand this, it can help you feel compassion toward someone you witness experiencing anger. After acknowledging where and how anger and avoidance techniques stem from, I thought of ways I could love and comfort myself. I think awareness and acknowledgement is the first step, but taking action in a loving and healthy way is the second. I hope others may find this information helpful as well. *Ways to feel loved and comforted (giving yourself attention when feeling emotionally vulnerable):* *Holding your pet* *Lighting candles (I like Eucalyptus, Sage or Cedarwood - I always use soy based and avoid chemical fragrance)* *Listening to comforting music (I listen to Nature Sounds, Meditation music, Indie Soul or Bossa Nova on Spotify)* *Write a Love Letter to yourself - which acknowledges emotional vulnerability by giving loving attention to yourself* *Put flowers in your space that smell and look beautiful (I like Rose, Peony or Hyacinth)* *Take a relaxing shower or bath (I like to add Dr. Teal's Eucalyptus or Lavender epsom salts)* *Massage your body with a luxurious sweet smelling oil (I like Jason Vitamin E Skin Oil - a blended oil that is organic)* These ways to feel loved and comforted by yourself can be utilized when you are fighting bad behaviors and addictions as well. I'll explain why. Looking back, self-soothing behaviors children develop in dysfunctional families (where the child is not tended to enough [by physical contact, receiving emotional love or acknowledgement of emotions]) can show in many ways for the rest of the child's life. As I already mentioned, Teal Swan talked about expressing anger and how it can really damage relationships, but she also mentions learning to be avoidant through isolation or distraction (for example, playing video games). From personal life experience, I think the idea of being avoidant through distraction from being raised in a dysfunction family can also look like this: using drugs (even marijuana), smoking cigarettes, drinking alcohol, sex addiction (whether in person, with pornography or in your mind), social media scrolling and TV/Netflix binging. Even food addiction is an example of bad self-soothing behaviors generated by utilizing distraction. Food addiction may present as eating when you do not even feel hungry or reaching out for sugary treats or caffeine in excess. Really so many of these bad habits and addictions can be avoided by acknowledging you grew up in a dysfunctional family and this is how you are trying to give yourself attention through distraction because you did not learn how to love and comfort yourself in a healthy way. I know it's sad but the behavior you are acting out through distraction is because you are in pain that no one showed up for you when you needed them to. Now that you know this, you can show up for yourself in a loving and comforting way (reference my examples listed above of ways to feel love and comforted when feeling emotionally vulnerable) instead of using avoidance or distraction. In other words, to stop bad habits and addictions, acknowledge them as avoidance and distraction techniques you learned in childhood to avoid feeling the pain of not having your emotional needs met. You can evolve as a person now by understanding as a child you developed avoidance, distraction and defense mechanisms to avoid pain. As an adult you can give yourself the love and attention you deserve and lead a happy and healthy lifestyle. I hope you found this information helpful on your Spiritual healing journey. *P.S. I put together some guidelines to write yourself a Love Letter:* *Always write with pen and paper *Write a love letter to yourself that makes you feel loved, comforted and your vulnerability acknowledged (this happens innately because you are spending time giving yourself loving attention) *Write as if you're writing to the love of your life *Express gratitude and kindness *Bring up a treasured memory ("Do you remember when...") *Give yourself words of encouragement *Talk about what's going on in your life *Express hopes and aspirations *Try to give yourself a compliment that makes you smile (term of endearment for example "my dearest, my forever love, my whole heart") *Tell yourself the little details that make you, you. For example, attributes or charming habits *Sign with love *Here's an opening "Love Letter to Yourself" example:* "My Dearest, I miss you so much. You are my whole heart. It's raining here in New York City. I have three candles lit as I write to you." .... Happy writing and healing! *Love,* *Moon Feather* *If Teal Swan would like to hire me as her assistant she can e-mail me at [e-mail]. *There are a lot of other ways you can cultivate healthy love, comfort and attention but this post was long enough. Comment with your ideas to contribute.*

[@Alaabatarseh]

Thank you for your insightful comment! It not only assisted me in crafting a lovely letter but also encouraged me to delve deeper into my emotions. I do have a minor point to add: it's natural to seek moments of distraction, such as watching TV, as we're not always equipped to confront vulnerability and powerlessness all at once. We're only human, after all, with finite emotional energy to navigate emotions. Nevertheless, I do agree with your overall idea. Thank you very much. Teal must accept your invitation to work with her :)

[@Happyalina]

Wow Teal! That was the most powerful and concise and practical explanation of the connection between anger and vulnerability I’ve ever heard! ❤ And my back ground is a degree in mental health!!!! That was awesome!!! Thank you girl!!!

[@SplendidMisanthropy]

And here she is, describing me and my issues.

[@erasetheyears]

Wow! Great video! I was that kid whose anger was met with bigger anger from my parents so I learned to direct the anger inward toward myself. I sometimes wonder if this is where cancer gets its start? Buried anger? Interesting that I developed 2 types of cancer in my female body parts. Family didn't want a girl. Boom.

[@harrymyhero]

OMG. Me too! What an insight!

[@tamorose]

This was totally me. I have been working on angry issues for more than a decade. I realized some time ago that my anger response was just a way to protect myself and push people away because somehow I felt safer. When you called her Tanya, it was as if you were telling my story 💜 Thank you for sharing your insights. Much food for thought and very appreciated.

[@Kamaya-gn8pf]

Three decades 🙋

[@cassandramartin-smith3354]

This is me 100% I tried very very hard to do this in both past relationship. Doing my processes on trauma working through it. First time I have ever heard this before yes I need to look after my vulnerabilities.

[@jessmarie6445]

Thank you! My anger gets the best of me sometimes and I’ve been struggling. This is very helpful.

[@slippedstitch0694]

I needed this today. Thank you Teal! You've helped me in so many ways. ❤

[@climbtheladder9440]

This brought up something in me. When you talked about the partner's responsibility I felt very cornered, like there was no way I was allowed to ask that of someone--support, taking accountability for their end, etc. Like, my triggers are my problem and if those pains rear their ugly heads around anyone then thats solely my problem too and everyone else gets to walk away unburdened. That has been how much of my healing journey has been where other people are involved.

[@alexstokowsky6360]

I would say that "Tanya" is a control freak. Timing is everything. If someone shows by their words or actions that this is not a good time for them, you hold off. Tanya's boyfriend is not her emotional punching bag. Self-control is important.

[@janicesmith1156]

Wow! This is so well explained. I have to listen to it more than once. Thank you so much. This will help me in so many ways. It has already helped me the first time I listened to it.

[@mysticapixie]

Thank you. This is going to help me heal a generational trauma on my mum's side. We would argue for hours each night and eventually did lead me to run away from home. I've since seen myself blowing up in the same way to friends and boyfriends I know what you're saying has worked for me in the past. This breakdown has made it so clear. It's even helped me to understand my mum. Perhaps one day I can teach her to heal this pattern too. Will be processing some pain and vulnerable feelings now. Thank you!!!

[@Reddituser502]

This is exactly what I needed to hear! Thank you

[@krielsavino5368]

Good one, thank you Teal

[@Francisays]

This feels validating to hear. 😊❤

[@user-ls8eo2no2b]

This woman is everything! Amazing and amazing messenger! ☀️

[@Beatrice_bb]

Come sempre, mi serviva questo discorso e pubblichi sempre al momento giusto. Perfetto . Grazie Teal.❤

[@tatianascalcon2479]

I am so happy that every time I watch one of Teal's videos I notice the number of her subscribers raising 🎉

[@spacesandy3410]

Ouff, this hit home way harder than I care to admit...And yet it felt so, so good to finally be understood. I've felt as though I've been castigated for my anger since childhood. It's made me think that there's something 'wrong' with me more times than I can count. What makes matters worse is that people often fail to see that the sudden anger is similar to the response of a wounded animal - they're not mean by nature, they're just hurting. So thank you, Teal, for making me feel heard and seen. My inner child is a little bit happier thanks to you:)

[@tallytacm]

The best video I ever saw about the subject. You basically explained what I'm learning in my self knowledge process

[@dijo9581]

I love this video!!🙏❤️‍🔥🐦‍🔥 This is what it means to rise from the flames. I used to b a very angry person, that was the most accepted emotion in the environment I grew up in which wasnt easy being a highly sensitive person. I empathically took on everyones rejected vulnerabilty because the power of my innocence found that to be the solution. We are loving beings by nature and our innocence is so powerful that we will find a way to love at all cost. As Teal describes we need to learn to be present with ourselves to know the difference between ourselves and others so that we can be present for others in their vulnerability. We cant expect from others what we cannot give to ourselves. Give yourself as much grace and compassion as your can and know that you are the love that you are waiting to receive from others. Then it becomes reciprocal.

[@user-rd3jq5uk6l]

100% me you talk about. There is so much tears and soul pain, I am on it, but this pain is deep and feels it will never get less and that it is too much to take. There is much from other Inkarnations. Thank you Teal, you are amazing, superbeautyful inside outside, I adore you ❤

[@dylangabriel13]

Thank you teal. Because of you I have started back up my KZbin channel and taken my content back to spirituality. Much love to you! ❤️ you are phenomenal!

[@ukraineisthecapitaloffreed3886]

It's good to get to the problem and fix it rather than stay outside and dismiss the point ❤ thank you 🙏

[@Damons-Old-Soul]

When dealing with any protector emotions, we rarely notice them right when they hit. It is usually at some point into that emotion going off, that we notice. If looking to do the techniques she described, when in that emotion, we learn to notice that we are in it, closer to it going off. It is a matter of taking note of the emotion as soon as we do and working backwards towards the point that the protector emotion goes off. Eventually we get to the point of noticing that the emotion will go off soon (before it goes off). Once there, we can learn to divert ourselves from letting it get set off. This is based on a DBT (Dialectal Behavioral Therapy) technique that works from the other end, looking for where the person could have chosen differently. I am not a therapist. This is a technique that I learned to use in my own life. I'm just sharing what I have learned on my own journey.

[@victoriadonaldson1274]

This one got me a little wide eyed. The universe truly is a mirror. I rlly needed this one. Thank u Teal.

[@dianeclayton4936]

This video ...so timely for me! Not the algorithm...divine intervention. Namaste Teal. 🙏

[@Kit-Awesome]

Finally, someone said something sensible about anger! Thanks 🙏

[@Laura-kw1fv]

4:40 so true omg that is exactly what happens you are so smart and wise

[@Nina_Kowsari]

Thanks Teal

[@bianca4829]

I never thought about it like this, but the way you explain this is incredible. Thank you ❤

[@edsimpson5423]

Thank you for your insights and guidance.

[@rundbaum]

i just want to say how beautiful this is & when it fell last nite, perfect timed! there's something about that set, or something i'm seeing that was like a HUGE cup of fruit punch; a huge cup of relief . . .

[@sarahtimper9095]

I’ve been dealing with this and this video is just what I needed today. Thank you so much Teal! You always know just the videos to put out. ❤

[@juliesayers6648]

Thank you Teal, your explanation helped me to understand my Father, I am able to love and nurture my Father instead of fearing him

[@StewARTist5]

Excellent topic for me today!

[@CMartinSalomon]

❤ this just came out in the right moment....❤ Love you so 🎉

[@fannymanson]

I genuinely appreciate your explanation of anger and vulnerability. Thank you !

[@melissaallison7446]

I am so happy I came across this video. Been listening to you for years and this hits home for me ❤. I love your insight on how to recognize the difference between anger and vulnerability and how to handle your emotions when it is recognized 💥💚

[@luciaharrow6250]

Love You Teal. You have helped me save myself many times over the past 6 years. The first vid of yours that came to me was your one on Intermittent reinforcement. You Are My Best & Favourite x

[@aboutnol]

Thank you❤ This is On point! I really needed that today ❤❤❤ I became so angry again because I ignored my anxiety and didn't slow down. I am so alone in my pain all the time I became so angry again after months of being in my pain alone and ignored. It's so damn painful to be alone in my own pain for so long with no one to see. I understand that when I become angry is because my tank is full and I need to rest and slow everything down and just to cry with myself for how long that it will last. The only way out from my hell is through it. Being alone with my pain. And to be angry at him does not work anymore. He doesn't care that I suffer every day because he ignores me for almost a year. Nothing will change that. He doesn't care. I am alone. I will always be alone. I need to be with that pain that he will never see me for who I am. Because this is the truth. And the truth is more important to me then anything.

[@brendalalicker4855]

Fantastic content! Always driven by a version of anger and an I'll show you" attitude, an opportunity was presented to me to dive in and see for myself what motivated me. The first difficulty was to identify the meaning of vulnerable since it isn't always a weak spot or a flaw as depicted in Achilles. Trust, hunger and despair can make us vulnerable. My conclusion has stayed with exactly what was perfectly stated in the video: "anything you truly need or truly value can make you vulnerable." Identifying our emotions through the prisma of vulnerability is a daunting task, especially if anger is the go-to response. Sometimes all you need is to know is, if you can't identify it spontaneously, vulnerabilty is nearby. In the end, learning to pinpoint which part of the vulnerability prism was/is being provoked has made a tremendous change.

[@NoOneAlInOne]

Thank you for allowing anger be there and let us Connect through Anger and pain. I try Not to escape this Feeling. I think that my Body Stores many Anger cause my muscles are disregulated but every evening i try to Focus on letting Go and relax

[@VictorKnowing]

I'm very happy too know I have a connection that's always there for us to enjoy constantly

[@shivashankara8065]

An ounce of practice is worth tonnes of theory 🙏

[@VictorKnowing]

You have truly discovered the key for woman and men to hold respect for each other moving forward

[@rmbru2k]

For me personally, I have learned to be attentive to my wife's needs when I recognize she may be exercising vulnerability and confidence in me to be supportive of her needs. Since I'm perfect, however (shields up), I do not always recognize those spontaneous callouts. Additionally, there are times when I do recognize her needs after my arrival home from a tedious and tiring day's work, but instead my aging biological system decides for itself to shut down, AKA fall asleep. And yes, sometimes she attacks. And yes, sometimes I defend. Anyway, my door is open for social correction and digital corporal punishment. Get on with it while I'm still bent over.

[@oksanashalygina1313]

Exactly what I realised this days, anger is not the problem. Teal thank you, always in right time always helpful ❤️❤️❤️

[@infinitedestiny6328]

Speaking from my heart is one of the best things I can do for myself! Just learning how to do this and it’s messy but feels so right. Get ready world I’m about to get my feels feelings and I going to share it with you! (Learn from my mistakes, be kind when expressing the feels)

[@The1972maxim]

❤Thank you?Did you mention me and my sister in the video?Well IT makes soooo much sense.The unrealized emotional neglect and often abuse makes IT impossible/ hard for US to ask for our emotional needs to be met directly..We hide our vulnerabilities cause we were brought up It's shameful to display them. which is so devastating....The/society at large associate angry people with bad people ....and there is no way to work things out .There is blame/shame ping-pong game going on between people and if we do not wake up in time,there's war.

[@Feyd-Rautha]

Best thing I chose it's to remain alone. Encourage others to do the same.

[@spacesandy3410]

Pain is a natural part of the human experience. We are a social, collective species and cannot thrive without one another, no matter how paradoxical it may seem at times. In my opinion, living life fully and risking pain in the process is astronomically more worth it than seemingly 'protecting' ourselves, but living in a state of constant, subconcious fear. I often remind myself that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself, so I hope this encourages you to open your heart to many wonderful people that this world has to offer!

[@mh0mz]

Beautiful message and action steps. Thank you soo much teal. You have helped me so much

[@raiderlove5923]

I grew up in a family with an environment like which you are discussing here, Teal. I, myself, never felt safe within the home much less my family.

[@brandonjosue24]

Might be obvious but nothing like it Great to see a woman with so much light on speaking

[@milomazli]

oh gosh, amazing topic! Thank you Teal!!! :))))

[@kasiako355]

That was so wise and helpful, thank you so much ✨💖✨

[@kal2487]

This was a stellar analysis. Thank you! ❤I have a regular nightmares with this exact same scenario, I'll have to explore what's going on in my psyche around being scapegoated and deal with that pain.

[@jennakfae]

how to love ❤️ i enjoyed listening to this. i used to get angry often

[@mamuhacheva]

Thank you for covering this topic 🙏

[@Stilllearning549]

Most of what Teal says here is spot on and deeply insightful. However common in self-help circles but unusual for Teal, she presents anger in a too simplified and negative light. Anger like all other emotions may arise with different intensities from the most subtle to the most extreme and loud. Similarly, anger can be expressed in a variety of ways. We speak about anger often when it is too intense and inappropriately or ineffectively expressed. In many situations, though, both the intensity and the expression of anger can be totally appropriate. Subtle anger could look like slightly raising your voice, frowning and speaking up for yourself or others, and sometimes, this is what a situation calls for. In fact, many of the examples Teal makes of constructive ways of behaving in response to anger, still has strong elements of anger in them in the form of assertiveness. The difference is that in the more constructive responses, the actions come based on a greater awareness, are more deliberate and carry more respect for both yourself and others. Otherwise, great video and helpful in taking one more step towards better relationships.

[@luanaspirits]

Thank you Teal. I had an argument recently and childhood patterns of anger came up. This video was amazing timing, and I will take your advice to heart.

[@aryanalfa2444]

Great advice, after so many good videos is always good to see notice in which you smile

[@kimberleeoneal]

You don't know it, but you actually made this video for me ❤

[@tommichelsen7304]

TEAL I HAVE NO WORDS TO EXPRESS HOW PROUD I AM OF YOU YOUR GUIDING NOW, YOU DIDN'T LET YOUR SPIRIT DISAPPEAR YOUR A SPIRIT AND SOURCE GUIDE LOVE TOM

[@navyamekera8145]

Wow!!!! Amazing video. Now I know exactly what to do! So clear and so precise. Love you Teal

[@henkverhaeren3759]

❤🙏 Recognize this so much.

[@littlecutiebees]

Such a great teaching! Thank you!🙏🏻

[@flowersandcrystals9347]

My partner has this black sheep - anger pattern. And it hurts so bad, when he's full blown angry at me. It really puts our relationship at risk. How can I not feel so hurt by that?

[@petr_si_hraje]

Thank you for this amazing and comprehensive video. I love how you combine multiple approaches to create a functioning system of thoughts and provide a practical tips on how to deal with discussed topic. 🙏 It is incredibly helpful ❤️

[@lovely0th]

I noticed it, and still dont know how to sooth myself , my husband always keeps me emotionally deprived , and even if i tell him i need reassurance , even if i directly express , he would still neglect, he would tell me u just keep pressuring me and making me feel guilty, and when u have kids some options are limited

[@epiphanysoulguidanceb756]

Thank you, Teaaaaalll!!!!! 🙏🙏🙏

[@phoqueewe7230]

Anger as a vulnerability is one aspect. If you dig past the anger into emotional intelligence and the layers of emotios that lead to the anger as a respons you find what the reason is below the anger. Anger is a legitimate and valuable emotion as much as any other emotion. It's when it becomes rage that's the problem.

[@courtport6957]

You’ve never described my son so thoroughly. He’s so angry and frustrated. His birth father abandoned him. Now I’m married to a man who really loves and adores him but has his own anger and traumas he won’t face. He’s such a terribly afraid man of his demons that he suppresses them in a way I’ve never seen before. His go to when my son gets upset is to antagonize him and it really eats me alive. He thinks he’s toughening him up but he’s really preparing him to be unprepared emotionally like him. He’s also very much a toxic positivity kinda guy. He grew up with lots of trauma and had much much more as an adult. He’s only willing to do certain healing things that ‘don’t hurt.’ It’s difficult to watch for both of them. I’ve done sessions of the Completion Process with a practitioner and it’s really given me the ability to step back and see the energy of their interactions. It’s painful but we all love each other. I dono… I guess my only hope is to be who my son needs when it comes to emotions.

[@ebbyoma7008]

If you know all these things about him, why are you with him?

[@courtport6957]

⁠@@ebbyoma7008because he will grow. He’s a good man with a good heart. Just very damaged from his own traumas. As it pertains to this video, my comment is true but he also teaches the kids, takes a deep interest in their interests, pays for everything, keeps them in sports, coaches them, plays with them, laughs with them… he just clearly gets triggered when any one of us doesn’t feel peachy keen

[@cherahsBroll]

Thank you for this Teal. I’ll now ask myself “What is the pain underneath my fear?” From now on when my anger or fear sets in.

[@supremereader7614]

It can be very frustrating when one is in pain cuz they feel like they're not being treated fair, then they repeatedly get told they're not being treated unfair...One big factor in #opoid Epidemic I think.

[@elizabethmoregraff7494]

Thank you so much for this incredible insight and support 🙏💛✨