The New Mid Life Crisis | Adam Alter

Psychology expert Adam Alter explores the phenomenon of the new mid-life crisis, its underlying causes, and empowering strategies to navigate this transformative phase with purpose and fulfilment.
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📖 Adam Alter is a renowned psychology expert and author known for his deep understanding of human behaviour and decision-making. With extensive research and a passion for exploring the complexities of the mind, Alter offers valuable insights into the psychological factors that shape our lives. His expertise sheds light on overcoming challenges, finding purpose, and making meaningful changes.
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Watch the full episode here❤kzbin.info/www/bejne/mXqVo4B7mZt6jZY Don't forget to Like & Comment! 🙌🏽

[@jercasgav]

Life is really pretty simple, but when people are blessed with health and a full tummy they begin to navel gaze too much and worry about things that are not ultimately of consequence (like a mid life crisis). I was permanently disabled due to a genetic disorder I did not know that I had at the age of just 25yrs old, and also became a mom as well. It was completely life altering to have a major health event as well as becoming a mom all at once. My husband and I experienced major financial issues as well due to multiple surgeries I needed to have (this was before the out of pocket maximum rule in 2012). At any rate, we somehow have made it through but my health still suffers, I have good days and bad days. To us life is simple, and a good day is a day when we are together as a family, my body works well enough we can go outside and have a walk in the sun, we have food in our bellies, and some money tucked away for a rainy day. My husband is also an ER nurse (has been for 16yrs), so I would also say we realize that life can change at any moment and any of us can be gone or have something that forever changes everything. The silly stuff just doesn't matter, and once you realize that you enjoy what the moment is, especially the good moments when they come along.

[@daveparsons5630]

This is the single most valuable thing on this page, including the video. Practice gratitude people and stop searching for answers from self-appointed gurus about how to be 'happy' or 'successful'.

[@lillylee2410]

God bless you

[@Infinitynow696]

An unexamined life is one not worth living. People should assess their lives everyday. If you get to age x9 and only think about it then, that’s a shame. I’m 56 and have lived intentionally from a young age. It’s not easy but worth it. It’s important to be a seeker and be authentic in the seeking with no attachment to outcome. We are here to experience life in all its incarnation and embrace all with love. Keep moving in life and you won’t be stuck.

[@LeoOrlando-yd2ut]

I am 54 years old, and sometimes I wish I looked when I was 21, but I have learned so much about myself, I would never want the naive mindset of being young again. When I see people, who have damaged their faces and bodies, in the futile attempt to look young again, I see someone with a damaged soul.

[@steelearmstrong9616]

Saying that you wished you could look 21 again but also calling people who have had work done damage souls is just ridiculous and hypocritical. We all want to look and feel good in ourselves. You could say that about people who go to the gym, getting tattoos, woman and their makeup, Botox, fillers, body piercing, clothing and having partner for status. Who cares what people do. We are all manipulative, attention seeking, damaged lost soul looking for validation on some level. Life is tough and we are all winging through life. We are all fake and we all have deep rooted insecurities. Buying things we can’t afford to impress people we don’t like is what we have all done and many continue with that till the day they die. There is no right nor wrong in life. Just live your life how you please.

[@KFontLab]

Imagine living until 90 and you worry about life at 29 or 35. 40 is considered middle age. Yet so many fear turning 30. Keep in mind your life is over when you give up. There are people changing their careers in 40s in 50s and more healthy than they were in their 20s. Life is a journey of learning and growing. Your life will look like what it’s supposed to be. Enjoy your story.

[@ChampaAinjel]

I'm copying this and making it my pc wallpaper. I need to be reminded of this. Thank you.

[@KFontLab]

@@ChampaAinjel Please do!… People are out here living freely. Some people on social media will have you thinking that even 21 is over the hill🤣… it’s just crazy… My word to you… LIVE!

[@Yo-oq9gg]

I am 9 years old, I think it’s to late for me

[@KFontLab]

@@Yo-oq9gg 9?!…🤣🤣🤣… Hilarious.

[@Theartofhappytravels]

This is interesting. I’m 37 turning 38 later this year. Never have had this mid life crises feeling in my late 20s. I’m looking forward to my 40s. I feel great overall in some of the best health I’ve been in. I quite drinking 4 years ago. I don’t do any drugs. At this point, I’m just enjoying the ride.

[@Pinkeye82517]

Yes, it’s part of feeding people ideas that stop their progression. Bring them down again

[@cookie_dough_hangover]

I am 47, of course I don't look as a 27 year old, but I have never felt better: my kids don't need me as much, I spent my best years raising them, now I can focus on myself and our marriage: we go out more, our s** life is much better. But. .but....I can't help but feel like a missed on a lot of things, I chose to raise my three kids, had no career, the feeling that I could have done more, achieved more, traveled more, not made so many sacrifices....the feeling that "it's too late". It is what it is. You can't change the past.

[@grannymac3929]

I wish I had time for a mid-life crisis.

[@oj7533]

Why ?

[@deqofarah3136]

Why you wished that

[@josh7693]

You’re so busy you don’t have time for emotions, that’s really cool bro, good for you! *Sarcasm, nobody cares stop b*tching**

[@mrnice7570]

Why? So the inevitable mid life crisis hits? Strange wish!

[@grannymac3929]

@oj7533 Meaning if you stay busy, you don't think about it. I work 70 hrs a week. No time for break downs. Sarcasm

[@pianoatthirty]

All these problems stem from one source - being stubbornly identified with the thoughts in your head. Read some Eckhart Tolle or Michael Singer, learn to meditate, learn to drop the unnecessary negativity. Life actually becomes so much more interesting when you're just present and curious, instead of being lost in your head, filled with these insatiable desires regarding external things you 'need to accomplish' in order to 'feel good'.

[@kristyjohnson2820]

THIS 🙌🏻

[@scuddster]

When I was 25 I felt old, but then someone pointed out yes! you are old, 25 is the oldest you have ever been! you have nothing else to compare it too

[@tonimariecleveland2447]

I think also with this, a lot of it depends on our situations, what type of family, (privileged or not), culture, what life throws up, family, children, situations. I am 56 & been a Mum since I was 22, unplanned, my daughter came along & then my son when I was 29, but his father, due to addiction, (worked in the city, so you can guess what type of addiction, the most common one), so have had a full time career since I was in my twenties, but also a single parent. So a lot of different things make our situations & life decisions at different times. 🤔👍

[@racheldahliamusic]

I LOVE THESE INTERVIEWS

[@kiwikathy]

@rachel So do I 👍🏼💫✨

[@luminousparadox7529]

For most of my life I was taught silver linings. I've suffered depression and bad break ups but now I'm 35 I find any tough situations I find my mind in are soon overcome by looking at what's gone right for me. I've tried to explain this to friends in hard times or at least be there to reinforce looking at the good with them. But what I've found is its an internal message that you have to understand with your core. Words will never do any of it justice because the feeling surpasses confidence or loving yourself. Deep reflection and understanding what you actually want makes it so, even while lacking confidence I can access the path that keeps me level. As I get older I appreciate more and more the simple lessons of self worth, silver lining, confidence while staying humble. My parents gave me a huge gift with those. Some of them I don't think they even understood the complexity of. Just said them as sayings or things you say to a growing person. For example i took care of my father while he was battling cancer. After he died I was able to be there for my mother while going to university. She always mentioned how strong I was going right after a tragedy and in my 30s. When I elaborated that it was because of lessons she taught me, she was in awe at how deep simple lessons could were. She never understood them the way I did or ment them so philosophically ( her words). Yet my deep understanding ment that they reinforced my character is ways I may not ever understand.

[@raqueldobson1]

I think life now just wears us out, we get exhausted quicker, burnout for longer, getting older/levelling up is not easy…

[@invisiblemaninvisibleman2097]

Very very true

[@marsjokes]

I wonder why 🤔

[@grannymac3929]

Not for me. I am over 60 and full of life and energy.

[@Jenny-rm7iz]

Mind blown....action side ways...lowering expectations to get out the worst to get the ball rolling;)

[@justonemorestitch]

I found this one to be really interesting because for me it is 7's. 27 was when I found my life partner, 37 I did an urban mudder, and now I'm 47 and I've decided. I want to become a creator, and escape my career. For me, it's something about my 7th year

[@RitaP41]

Cuz it's the end of a cycle...Eastern religions talk about that.

[@lewisstredwick7616]

Very , very informative , thank you that sinks in for sure .

[@ragdollmag]

19 to 21 was an unhappy mess but happier when I was doing fashion school at 22 and becoming a mum. I competed in artistic figure roller skating at nationals when I was 29, when I was 39 I walked away from a situationship that didn't seem to be heading anywhere in 2020 I felt like it was a 10 ending and not a 0 beginning like I had to end things to start something new and different rather than a new beginning to try make things work since I already tried that and not succeeding so it was time to end. Now I'm 42 and in the stuck phase on the love front aside from a why him 1 yr old kitten who didn't make it who was the perfect rebound and perpetually in the planning and creative phase with my pre launch decades old start up non business. I've had lots of why me and never felt comfort being reminded I'm not the only one.

[@mrxcitement272]

i needed this thank you!

[@ldmorris21]

Every year before I turn a new age I do something new and exciting. For that reason June is always transformative.... New sexual experiences, getting my first van, spiritual awakening, new home, first meditation retreat... You have these crisis when you go through life like a zombie. If you're living life consciously, life is always exciting. I am not the normal 35 year old. Don't care about marriage and kids and success in the eyes of society. I follow my own heart. Keep self reflectijg and doing personal development.

[@MisterNumber6]

Just hope it's this exciting when you are old and alone

[@wyleecoyotee4252]

I was fine through my 50's but realizing i'm 60 now is real tough

[@thesjewishpsychedelicsandbox]

I'm going to use this conversation in a class I will be teaching online about how I read the book of Kohelet. Thanks for the helpful content!

[@imsara_h]

who are you to "teach" these things??

[@tacitdionysus3220]

Sounds a lot like Ericsson's theory of psycho-social development (identity crisis, etc.). It's been extensively demonstrated across cultures and history, yet the much less scrutinised 'generational differences' idea has been popularised to a much greater degree (even though it departs from the original Strauss-Howe theory). Probably what we think is 'typical of Gen (insert letter)", is really just typical of being 20, 40, 60 or 80; albeit in a slightly different era.

[@favor2240]

One of the best interviewees- I need this guy to be my life coach 😊

[@dmystfy]

Study anthropology 🎉

[@mihaeladog7187]

Do’t stop working !Never retire!I always said if I have to chose between work for free and retire , I’ll work for free.

[@claire-christmas-august73]

i have no expectations therefore i don’t get disappointed.. i just do and be the best me daily.! ☺️😊😃 ✌🏻🌏🇦🇺🤘🏻

[@kimsherlock8969]

We know we are older that doesn't mean everyone is aware . Many people must soldier on no matter their age they must keep battling on 😮 Living is not a self focus on growing older , It is maybe for some a continuous paying the rent 😮

[@anthonymwanje8398]

Professor, thanks for your balanced perspectives of life

[@MNolanMillar]

I just turned 49. I can feel it, like a fire has been kindled

[@yoursubconscious]

yeah, my nine-year-old, who run three companies, and manages 700 people, is dealing with this, too. Do we hustle too much?

[@yosoyroman875]

31 now, I don’t think I reached any kind of crisis at 29. I did fear being old of course, being a woman and not having kids. Since I was young I always wanted 4, and to be at least 3 kids down by now, happily married, good career. I’m beginning a good career now, that’s challenging, and something I feel unworthy of in a way. I have a fiancé who loves me, and I can accept that maybe I’ll only have one kid. But the possibilities make me happy, especially since I revamped the expectations of what I want.

[@cullenkehoe5184]

Life comes in seasons...borrowing language from the Bible (Ecclesiastes)? The section the song Turn, Turn, Turn is based on?

[@tarawhite4419]

I had a quarter life crisis so hopefully I'm done with that

[@KeepLearing]

Oh - Now I understand... THIS, is what mid-life crisis mean! I had it when I was 29 and turning 30s 🥴I'm okay now - 34, but it was not funny how and when I went through it. My life was hell from 30 - 33 but I'm rather serene now. Oh gosh... does that mean another one is coming very soon then... I hope not!

[@annabelapurva-madhuri4861]

I’m 34 too…we hit our 30s around the pandemic which probably impacted it too

[@RS1xT]

Whatever thought you give energy to, it manifest. Thoughts are creative. I hope you shift your focus to accept that whatever you experience in life, it’s all for you & you can get through it like you’ve always done. Be at ease & enjoy your time here, 1day @ a time. leave the future for when you get there.

[@lavinder11]

You went through your Saturn return. Most people look down on astrology, but it's pretty accurate.

[@cullenkehoe5184]

I had no time to worry about this stuff at 19, 29, or 39. A man's 40's can be depressing tho as your body noticeably changes and you can't do stuff you used to do 5-10 years earlier (athletic stuff or cramming lots into a day...and can't recover as quick from them, weight gain, etc....) For me you can't get away from looking back as you get into your 40's and making sense of what you accomplished or didn't so far. (But at 29? I was not worried about this stuff at 29 or even necessarily 39.)

[@taylortrzeciak7572]

"why me?" is a moment to say "what am I seeing or learning that could add to my story?"

[@jackilove523]

It’s simply explained with astrological major life transits Saturn return ages 29-30, Uranus Opposition, Pluto Squares, Neptune Squares & 2nd Saturn Opposition 38-44, Chiron Return 49-50, 2nd Saturn Return 59-60, in between those ages Saturn & Uranus Squares and or Oppositions … it’s all very simple … learn how to read your birth chart & understand current planetary transits & you know when it starts & when it ends & know that you’re not losing your mind. 🙏💚💫

[@oj7533]

I like this

[@musamusashi]

I am in my mid 50's and still have not come out of adolescence 😊 live your life at your own pace, and fu** expectations.

[@sadiemakesmesmile]

I’m sorry but an expectation that you have a roof over your head and will continue to have that over your life and into old age is not a privileged expectation to have, yet so many do not have that… despite working hard. That may contribute somewhat to people’s state of mind and anxiety.

[@miggity_mac]

Yeah wow I’m 39 this year and did Everest Base Camp. I wanted to do something big before my 40th

[@kallivino8346]

Let was a long explanation of what a number with a 9 at the end is !

[@annwilliams6438]

Heavens! ‘Mid-life crisis’ used to be 45 to 55! 30-something??

[@KFontLab]

Right!…

[@CC-bx7bh]

Wow he’s not wrong

[@alexyssaubrie1606]

Traveled outside the US for the first time at 29, and went sky diving. But at 30, I lived in a foreign country for 3 months, and then flew an airplane 3 times.

[@crystalwebster2005]

Omg I did this at 19 wtf was I thinking

[@Derby08]

Wait till 59….. Very stressful!

[@internetfairy1]

No sound

[@e.s.l.1083]

The question becomes - would this occur if we didnt know our birthday (@ all ah... they are just now talking about 'symbols' (though, perhaps it is hormonal

[@cullenkehoe5184]

Life is easier to deal with if you have religious faith. If you know God loves you and you are making your way toward dwelling with him forever it helps to put things into perspective. But you still have some of these natural human impulses and experiences. For goodness sake though, people, settle down and have some kids and raise them. It is part of why we exist...one of our jobs before we die to propagate the species. It's enormously rewarding and keeps you from being lonley. There is no perfect man or woman to have them with either. You have to pick someone and go with them, work with them.

[@k8sl]

Old age crisis. Fear of dying and/ or not being “marketable”.

[@butchbrewer4923]

Ever watch the movie Sunset Boulevard? The when fuel of a narcissist begins to wane...the lack of evolution begins to matter

[@lavinder11]

A lot of this is explained y astrology and numerology, especially the 9 year.

[@jackilove523]

Right!? Very easily explained through major astrological life transits… wish more understood this🙏💚💫

[@lisarincon3527]

Lol I ran trained at 49 to run my first marathon at 50! Yup I did and I’m ready to do it again but I’m almost 57 lol but I do see in friends & family 9 crisis! Interesting❤

[@em945]

Take care, I think the marathon training fashion is very hard and aging on the body. If you look at Adam's right outerbrow, it is missing, an indicator of low thyroid. I would guess his body will not want to train in that way for much longer. Maybe you could master a new dance or pilates, yoga...anything that builds the body. I imagine you will have fun whatever you do.

[@ejtattersall156]

When you are a child and you are potty training and you finally go on the potty, your parents give a huge cheer and it is a great accomplishment just to take a crap in the right place. You spend the rest of your life trying to reproduce that moment.

[@Dalabombana]

WELL DONE EJ!!!! 👏👏👏 we know you could do it! 😂

[@ejtattersall156]

@@Dalabombana HAHAHA!

[@dinosemr8141]

💖❤️💖🙏❤️💖❤️

[@Yo-oq9gg]

I turn 9 today I think it’s too late for me

[@limolnar]

Just for clarification 35-50 is mid-life. After that it's late-life.

[@royfr8136]

45/46 for me

[@jonathanhaesendonckx862]

your literly creating a problem here (making people that have a 9 at the end they maybe start to get motivated and structured. This could be good and bad.)

[@kenglenwright4040]

The one advantage of being working class, you have none of these hang ups lol

[@jojorey6886]

Madonna, midlife crisis? That ship sailed a long time ago, she qualifies for Medicare and AARP that puts her at elderly.

[@jenA9026]

Ageism is a bitch.

[@karimtabrizi376]

I think men and woman have different views on lives achievements by 40s. Most are influenced by societt

[@radicaledwards3449]

7:03 All my life I thought of the 'mid life crisis' as one of those strange perculiar white people things. Still to this day I have never seen a group of black men talking about 'mid life crisis'.

[@benhartart9487]

Men usually are Successful in middle life Age 35-45 so it’s not a crisis he is jut enjoying the fruits of his success Madonna is a woman who is more at the end of her life 😂 clinging to her glory days

[@doricdave7192]

The term ‘successful’ should be obliterated. It causes so much grief and means nothing. What is success?! 😢

[@CrystalRicotta]

I’m not falling into this number category

[@karinalombrozo3257]

learn to emotionally process and get a spiritual practice

[@maddie9185]

A lot of people have mid life crisis they don’t always display it with plastic surgery.

[@MrWaterbugdesign]

29 in crisis? That's just funny as hell.

[@jameslau6593]

you got to be kidding

[@maxyogi]

I can Respect Butt implants/augmentation when done tastefully. (Groceries)

[@manofthenorth6372]

I'm 29 and only now I know who tf I am.

[@donnasherwood283]

totally disinterested in listening to two guys in their 20s or early 30s opining on this topic. it is beyond arrogant. At least get a guest who has lived the experience. Also I don't care what anyone says I think that facelift madonna had is fabulous. great plastic work but I also agree that many are distorting and freakish mostly in the filler work. I respect both sides of opinions on this want to age naturally SUPER want to look better why does anyone in this day and age have any problem with this ?

[@cullenkehoe5184]

The shrink said he turned 40 I thought.

[@donnasherwood283]

@@cullenkehoe5184 still not interested no man alive who does not get fat or slovenly is anything other than improved by ageing up to around 80. No 40 yr old guy has a clue but most females by 45 understand this in their bones

[@RitaP41]

Horrible advice when it comes to dating...get Therapy, grieve the relationship and work out your stuff before messing up other people.

[@KFontLab]

Yes we live in a society that pushes “get over it and get under someone else” which is a definite factor as to why so many relationships and marriages end so quickly. People have not taken the time to heal and grow without being attached to someone romantically.

[@nevisscot7697]

A drug and alcohol crisis

[@michaelshannon9169]

Losing our health and youth! Yay!

[@dellwright1407]

losing your youth is inevitable... I hope you wont have to lose your health as well though.

[@michaelshannon9169]

@@dellwright1407 Thats what youth is - health. When we say health we mean optimal. You may not be sick but not being sick doesnt equal optimal health. After your 30's you'll see.

[@dellwright1407]

@@michaelshannon9169 I didn't need to wait until after my 30s to lose my health. When you're really sick you'll stop wishing for "optimal health" and just wish to be healthy and not sick. You'll see.

[@michaelshannon9169]

@@dellwright1407 Yeah, we lower the bar with every passing year. Which is bad. Our cars, our house, our gardens, time damages things, should we be ok with that? Although we cant reverse time it doesnt therefor doesnt mean we should be ok with that.

[@dellwright1407]

@@michaelshannon9169 If you are past your youth but still have your health then thats great. Look after your health, enjoy life and hopefully you'll have many more years of healthy life ahead. Life is short, so enjoy each day and what you can do rather than pine after something thats gone. That would be my advice.

[@lolitoslolito5052]

Madonna is almost 65 and you use it in thumb as exemplification of mid life???? Believe you me, she had already a full realised life. More than most people will ever wish to experience in 10 life-spans. She is arrived, not "middle-wayed". She is having fun and making the last crumbles for her children. Pls use better references and make more informed decisions on videos contents/thumbnails. I understand is an easy click bait but... na pls. Just my advice

[@brendawood6712]

Midlife crisis Madonna is way past midlife!

[@jameslau6593]

she still rocks !!!

[@ls-l1518]

You don't have a mid life crisis in your 60ies. Madonna is 60 plus.

[@musicgeekish]

Mid life? Madonna is elderly.

[@joanneshapiro5926]

Mid life crisis at 64 ???? Really lol

[@pedrolopes3542]

Mid-life crisis? Madona is nearly 70... The bytx is from the era of gramophone.

[@Richard-wp6ep]

Madonna is having a end life crisis

[@pkendlers]

Madonna is not in midlife. She is almost retirement age.

[@karinalombrozo3257]

ummmm don’t do this! all of this is spiritual bypassing and rebounding is not ok

[@missdriss5938]

Madonna is in her late life crisis She is not in midlife.

[@starcrib]

All bullshit- human apathy is the winning key. Managed apathy makes sense and you don't need a "9" at the end of a decade to become realized. 🗣🔳⬜️🟫🟧🟥🦖☄️

[@Theartofhappytravels]

This is interesting. I’m 37 turning 38 later this year. Never have had this mid life crises feeling in my late 20s. I’m looking forward to my 40s. I feel great overall in some of the best health I’ve been in. I quite drinking 4 years ago. I don’t do any drugs. At this point, I’m just enjoying the ride.

[@imsara_h]

you haven't had this feeling in your 20s because it's all made up. These people in the video create this "research" and drama to make people feel shiit.. it's there to help sell their books and podcasts. It's absolute rubbish!

[@imsara_h]

also good for you for not being influenced by these ridiculous influencers all over the internet!