The Noise (An Award Winning Eating Disorder Short Film)

The Noise
Written and produced by Jillian Shea Spaeder
Directed by Bryce Gheisar
For full credits visit our IMDb site!
Give us a review on Letterboxd!
If you or a loved one is struggling please do not be afraid to ask for help - Jillian

[@majo8352]

this captures perfectly how having an eating disorder feels like..

[@JillianSpaeder]

🩷

[@farahmeddeb8746]

This is EXACTLY how having an eating disorder feels like. I wish more people see this

[@fernanda4731]

As someone who has had an eating disorder, I perfectly understand every second of this short, I understand the feeling of wanting and not being able to, of demanding yourself and neglecting yourself, of being afraid of a look , of a scale and seeing yourself in the mirror expecting immediate results, very good job guys!

[@JillianSpaeder]

thank you. best of luck with recovery!!

[@xkceyx]

I feel like this is the most relatable and realistic short film of ed ive seen

[@JillianSpaeder]

[@khadegaeshaer2533]

This is literally what happens in my head every single day

[@Olivia-l8d4v]

Are you doing okay now 🥰

[@khadegaeshaer2533]

@@Olivia-l8d4v no I'm still stuck in the same cycle

[@abi123__]

this captures everything about eating disorders so perfectly, from watching the food videos to throwing food down the drain, im sure this has inspired many people to choose recovery because this is the reality of eds and its not pretty. thank you for making this !

[@JillianSpaeder]

🥹

[@Ally_.271]

I LOVE THIS I never would’ve thought the little girl from walk the prank would be in such a perfectly directed mini movie pls keep this up this is amazing

[@JillianSpaeder]

🥲🥲🥲

[@caristone1067]

Thank you for capturing so eloquently the voices and power of ED. As someone who considers themselves as in recovery for 10 years, these memories of torture are close to the surface. This film is brilliant on so many levels, is mindful of not blaming anyone as we are prone to do, and show just how secret these struggles are. It’s an abusive relationship with ED. Silent and isolating. Thankful for real talk and portrayals like this now coming forward. Keep doing great work! This film and how it’s presented, cinematically, angles and lighting,.. brilliant.

[@cristiancontreras4001]

As someone who just took a class on abnormal psychology and learned about anorexia and bulimia, this was sad to see unfold. Great job guys!

[@JillianSpaeder]

thank you.

[@olive8146]

Oh my god. I have never seen anyone depict the struggle with anorexia as well as you did with this short film. I cannot thank you enough, you make me feel less alone in this ❤

[@mightbeme7]

“im gonna do better, im gonna do better” “you’re a constant disappointment.” im crying actually

[@jacobgornall1952]

Honestly this is a fantastic short film i love how it shows how an eating disorder can feel like its running your whole life with no way out

[@megankohli]

in tears. this is absolutely incredible, i hope your doing well 🤍🤍

[@JillianSpaeder]

thank you so so much🥲 i’m doing so well

[@xSpartanK15x]

Awesome that you and Bryce reunited to make something on your own 👏👏 amazing job!

[@JillianSpaeder]

awww thank you!!!!

[@sparrow1407]

This is great but can we not ignore the “ I think you need more green beans” 😭✨😂

[@JillianSpaeder]

hahahha

[@oliviahurley79]

This is such a great video! I was diagnosed with an eating disorder and hospitalized the first time at 9 years with anorexia. It's been a battle everyday from the abuse and trauma of the places I have been sent to and how my parents have treated me. It was hard growing up in hospital and even harder further in recovery when they would gaslight mw into saying it was just the voice invalidated any experience emotion or behavior

[@TaeRae-sg3py]

This is the most accurate representation that I’ve ever seen

[@exa.studios3862]

My name is Ella.. basically my whole life in a video.

[@faithfrancisco9829]

Omg the scene when she woke up late at night was too relatable 😭 as someone who has OSFED, I just want to say that if you are struggling with an eating disorder, you aren’t alone, and even though you may not believe it, you have worth and you are beautifully and wonderfully made 🥰 hope this helps someone

[@p3talsdotpng]

God that voice in my head arranging everything is so relatable.

[@snuffkaninchen]

this is exactly how it feels. i've been battling this shit for almost 2 years now and it won't go away no matter how hard i try. i'm just so tired of it taking over my life. i wish i could be happy and feel pretty without a care in the world but i can't. it's destroying me.

[@spirituallysafe]

There is a way out ❤ Jesus said “I am the way, the truth and the life; no-one comes to God except through Me (John 14:6). Jesus wants you to to cast all your cares on Him because He cares for you (1 Peter 5:7). Only by repenting of sin and trusting in Jesus to guide your life are you spiritually safe for all eternity. I encourage you to prayerfully read The Holy Bible.

[@Lacimonay]

Jillian, this was amazing. You wrote something here that is very relatable to a lot of people and I hope they get to watch this and see that they aren’t alone.

[@JillianSpaeder]

thank you so much 🥲

[@Hrkmi12]

I just really appreciate videos Like this i didn't even realize I had this eating disorder mine isn't as extreme as this film but I was able to save myself thanks so much for the creators

[@jillianspaeder5645]

That's exactly why we made it. Take care of yourself. xxx

[@Milanlane1215]

Still in shock and in tears about how amazing you and Bryce did with this film. I’ve been waiting for this ever since it’s been announced. Im so incredibly proud. I love this so much. Watching this makes me cry tears of sadness, but also joy at the fact that you were strong enough to make a film about this which helps raise awareness and tells your story. Im so proud of you, love you. 💕

[@Umi_zoomie]

the best depiction of (my) experience of an eating disorder i have ever seen, thank you

[@paulineti]

Thank you for this meaningful and impressive short film! What a nightmare it must be to be confronted with this inner terror all the time.

[@bubzilla6137]

Oh man... This truly captures what it sounded like in my head when I dealt with anorexia in high school. That was years ago and I'm perfectly fine now so I'm not seeking sympathy or pity. I just want to compliment you on the accuracy of the thoughts and feelings. But also the quality of production is fantastic! All in all, absolutely amazing film! Well done! On a much more important note, I'm glad you're doing better as well. It truly is a struggle that many will never fully comprehend. I hope you continue to do well. And thank you for sharing your story! 🙂💙

[@JillianSpaeder]

wow this is so sweet. 🥲🥲🩷🩷

[@crochetJGK]

this encapsulates every moment, from the planning your day out to whats left. This is so powerful

[@xjustagirl]

I’m speechless… This is so so amazingly well captured and painfully relatable as someone who has been battling this for many years. This explains the best way possible to outsiders how awful this disorder can be. It serves a very educational purpose without stigmatising any eating disorder! By far the best short film about this I've ever seen, I am going to share this for sure because there literally is no better way to explain the hell inside your head. From the bottom of my heart, thank you ❤️🥺

[@jillianspaeder5645]

Thank you so much. This means a lot to me

[@xjustagirl]

@@jillianspaeder5645 you're welcome

[@charlietao-x9h]

every second of every hour of every month of every year described to me in one video

[@strawberrybabydolly]

This is the most realistic ed in a film ive seen

[@JillianSpaeder]

thank you

[@jor8324]

This is so amazing. I felt every single moment. Happy to have been in recovery for around two years now.

[@Annieshuynh]

Everything about this was top notch! I need to see more acting and producing from you!!

[@JillianSpaeder]

THANK YOU 😭

[@bendaon825]

Powerful stuff. Thank you for sharing this with the world.

[@JillianSpaeder]

[@carlsteinmetz6968]

I also struggle with an ongoing eating disorder. My weight reached a point that I'm embarrassed to admit, and I deeply understand the negative self-talk associated with eating and exercise. It's fortunate that Ella experienced anorexia nervosa, as excessive weight gain can lead to significant health issues.

[@dilana4548]

i just realized that this girl is literally living my life

[@okamichan_1999]

I can't relate to the calory thing but the voice that tells you that you ate too much and all is so real, this movie is really good!

[@scottmerrill2416]

This amazing work Jillian. I've struggled with food my entire life. I know these feelings all too well. Thank you for having the courage to share your story.

[@JillianSpaeder]

I am so sorry to hear that. Best of luck with recovery!

[@sweettea.1]

Right now, im struggling with eating disorder and slef harm but this video really explains on how ed feels like

[@Kat-hw1bv]

Less about calories or counting. More like making myself think just how gross I am, how disgusting the food is, how it’s gonna affect me and disgusting depictions in my mind of how what I’m eating makes me fat.

[@alaunasjourney]

Holly crap 😮 you did this?? So good

[@JillianSpaeder]

THANK YOU!!!!

[@anakarencastanedalara34]

It is so sad how she is struggling a lot but her family hardly notices it, that same thing happened to me until it got really serious. Such a great and accurate story to how it feels to have an ED, thank you for your vulnerability Jillian :)

[@lilshawtythebaddest4429]

BRYCE AND JILLIAN YOU OUTDID YOURSELVES WHY WAS THIS SO GOODDDD

[@S_person]

i search for pizza tower and i get this.

[@lesleereyes8804]

Wow this is so beautifuly described/vocalized from an ED point of view😮

[@JillianSpaeder]

thank you!

[@taylor_swiftly-]

This is such a good short film!!! :)

[@amoxzi]

The auditory hallucinations/hearing voices... it's almost like schizophrenia.

[@LunaRuiz_14]

Jillian I can’t believe how well and perfectly this describes what people with eating disorders feel and go through all the time🫶🏼so happy and proud of how far you’ve come

[@Olivia-l8d4v]

I believe in you

[@shanebrady5994]

Wooooo way to go Jill!!!! 8.4K views in one day?!?!!

[@JillianSpaeder]

woohoo!

[@Bella-yb9zo]

The way I RELATE and UNDERSTAND everything wow

[@Olivia-l8d4v]

You can recover pls recover

[@Bella-yb9zo]

@@Olivia-l8d4v I just wanna be skinny that’s all that matters 💗

[@AnaBGomes.]

i just sobbed watching this. this is so powerful and so good! i felt like i was watching myself

[@TheJuliaMarley]

SO INCREDIBLEE

[@JillianSpaeder]

[@firebird_613]

This is a absolutely amazing short film keep up the great work Jillian 👍 and hope you're having a blessed and wonderful day ☺️🙏❤️

[@JillianSpaeder]

thank you! you as well!

[@firebird_613]

@@JillianSpaeder you're welcome ❤️

[@BigShotSpamton]

"This isnt the Pizza Tower"

[@AnnaS-es2yr]

words can’t fully describe how meaningful this is. i’m happy i found it. i used to watch you on TV and… i just feel so heard and seen.

[@JillianSpaeder]

❤

[@ZEPETO_523]

This is exactly an eating disorder, I think there should also be something about cake on ur birthday…. This is almost a perfect reflection of what my life is at this eating disorder hospital

[@jillianspaeder5645]

[@yourfavmaya-456]

I didn’t know I had an eating disorder until this video.

[@ellaa1400]

I’m going through this atm and my names Ella so this really hit deep. This is a masterpiece!

[@ajsommers1095]

This was filmed beautifully. Amazing job you guys

[@cyb3rdive]

I cringe so hard watching these. That's because I see so much of myself in them. This was really well done, captured the eternal battle you have with yourself with eds. I hope whoevers struggling with it as well recovers safely 💞💞

[@rainbowxstorm1105]

So amazing you’ve done an incredible job 👍👏👏👏

[@Theodore_J_Noiseter]

WHATS UP WOAGSTER

[@katiegrundle9900]

This is so true. Its that voice that is slowly killing me. Sone days i cant cope and feel like a pupoet on a string

[@Marinassochoa]

Wow this film is amazing 👏🏻👏🏻🙏🏻

[@Babbs18]

I don’t know you personally but im so proud of you ❤

[@JillianSpaeder]

🩷🥲

[@aratherlargerodent]

the noise??? from tower pizza???

[@Remy4300]

This is so accurate omg

[@yourfriendlyneighbourhoodj1549]

So happy I can finally watch this!!

[@JillianSpaeder]

yay!!

[@kaylapalmer5229]

Currently bawling

[@AtlasMcGinnis]

Yk it’s bad again when your KZbin is recommending these vids again

[@pronounhoarder_8632]

Thank you for not making her super emaciated. It’s so rare to see a healthy weight anorexic person. Emaciation is a minority actually because most anorexic people have life or family reasons why they can’t eat how they want to get that small. This is so true it hurts. How big and daunting a “normal” meal feels. How you’re already planning out your food at the start of the day. Not being able to sleep and sneaking in moments to eat what you “shouldn’t” just to regret it later. Finding out ways to lie, get out of it, look like you’re eating etc.

[@kaylenaf784]

My god, this is on the nose. My heart was pounding while I watched. WOW.

[@АхахахВхвхых]

Putting spaghetti in the sink was the craziest part

[@ellasgv17]

This is absolutely amazing! Hearing my name honestly felt like this was something I needed to hear/see so thank you! Seriously great job

[@JillianSpaeder]

🩷🩷🩷🩷

[@luispacheco3095]

Fue muuy bueno, tengo suerte de que tenga susbtitulos en español, me encanto 🤎

[@kayley444]

i loved watching walk the prank as a kid this is such a masterpiece omg

[@JillianSpaeder]

thank you!!!

[@hannahburke7328]

This Is Relatable, In Some Ways Because I Struggle On And Off With Binge Eating. 😢

[@abbyrempala9077]

Jill this is so incredible I'm so so proud if you its not easy to speak up about these things and this is such a masterpiece I'm so proud🥹🫶❤️

[@JillianSpaeder]

thank youuuu!

[@birthdayboyblam7900]

Woag.

[@LandonDoseStuff]

Oml this was incredible

[@skylanderlab1857]

This isn’t Pizza Tower’s 3rd boss…

[@n8jma]

Hey, I loved this short flim I was thinking maybe you guys can add international resources at the end to help people with eating disorders since you guys are exploring topics about eating disorders which a lot of people have! Thanks and again great short flim

[@celestina_12]

This is exactly was happens every single day in my head because I have an ED disordver

[@abbieshorter628]

amazing. i’m so proud of you

[@ButterflyJourney_yt]

Awesome very incredible ❤️

[@VivienAnderson]

Literally incredible

[@JericcaSarraga]

Me right now, how it'll stop!!! 😭

[@pamboufay]

this made me sob! i thinks this is the best short film that represents eating disorders so well! great job!!

[@jillianspaeder5645]

Thank you so much!

[@hupernikomen2015]

How to u get your loved one to not refuse treatment when they are 18 n u cant legally force them to? (Ofcoirse thats the last option n getting them to want to care for themself) but its like watching them torture themself everyday.💔😭

[@TAW-26]

This so beautiful

[@JericcaSarraga]

Me right now, how it'll stop?!!! 😭

[@hindsunup6777]

THIS IS SO WELL DONE??

[@TheSIaySisters]

nice job

[@BusterBiggins09]

Where my woagers?

[@CruelSwiftie-v8p]

omg who wrote this had eating disorder im suree

[@JillianSpaeder]

Sure did lol

[@MattAndPock-uk7tz]

WOAG

[@aydenwakefield14]

i've never felt so seen

[@ellaburt0n]

My name is Ella so this just hit a little more

[@mr.mewtwo322]

woag

[@michelemaloney188]

Bravo BB