The One Thing That Destroys Men's Lives

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Күн бұрын

Пікірлер: 63

@sportlams 3 ай бұрын

Men should know that success isn't built on success. It's built on failure and frustration, and on fear that you have to overcome. That's what the e-book called Unveiling Your Hidden Potential' by Bruce Thornwood taught me. The best read I ever had.

@iamjackakers 3 ай бұрын

This is the type of wisdom that I’m so happy to be learning at age 24. I’ve already seen what lack of impulse control can do to my life, so resources like this that help guide you in the right direction are so important for men of any age. Thank you Connor.

@v1rusrog862 2 ай бұрын

Same here At 24 i really need this tips

@TheTrevasaurusRex 3 ай бұрын

I have been recently diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder. I'm 36 and have struggled with impulse control my entire life. I feel massive emotions that I don't know how to process. Luckily, I sought help and I am currently in the midst of DBT. I'm learning the skills that I need to manage these big emotions and fears of abandonment so that I can reframe and interact with the world in a way that is more fulfilling for me.

@juanvaldez5422 2 ай бұрын

At least you are in DBT. Best of luck

@lachutequimarche8074 3 ай бұрын

Don’t worry- I laughed at ‘hard on’ before you called it out. Thanks for keeping it in. And thank you for this incredible channel! I’m making changes and you’re helping immensely.

@AscendedVitality 3 ай бұрын

Stellar Video Connor 😊 Brain + Nervous System Regulation is Everything!! Advice = Stop Ingesting Stimulants… Caffeine, Energy Drinks, etc. 🙏🏼💪🏼

@seabee3097 3 ай бұрын

emotion starts in the stomach, expands over the body and then at the tail end, blips into the brain where we become aware "I'm scared" or "that was funny".

@robertyoung1381 3 ай бұрын

Thank you so much for sharing these videos. They have been such a Godsend in my life and I'm so happy I found you. I'm anxious moving very progressively into secure. I'm learning to set boundaries, respect myself and love others properly because of some of your stuff. THANK YOU.

@ManTalks 3 ай бұрын

Outstanding!! Glad to hear that they've hit home for you and supported you.

@SGTXSAVAGE 3 ай бұрын

Man… thank you for this video, seriously.

@ManTalks 3 ай бұрын

You're welcome. Thanks for tuning in!

@benjaminpikoikj7090 3 ай бұрын

@@ManTalksyour video on how to get through anxious attachment styles in men brought me to tears. Thank you for the work you put in.

@ManTalks 3 ай бұрын

@@benjaminpikoikj7090 Ah man, glad to hear. More videos to come on attachment. Going to be dropping some work for all the people who are digging into attachment and trying to have better relationships. Stay tuned!

@ProfitableHomestead 3 ай бұрын

Thank you! I found this video a bit crass but despite that it is extremely helpful!! I struggle with impulse control and I appreciate the advice to practice with little things and before the battle begins. Once the game has begun the time for practice is over. Plus reviewing lost battles is extremely important as well. Thanks for that tip!

@mikek7660 3 ай бұрын

This is fking brilliant, dude. Even down to the origins of the behavior, from punishment in childhood.

@MK-zb5nm 2 ай бұрын

Another great video Connor. Not just diagnosing the problem but giving solutions as well. Keep them coming mate.

@amantinoubliable 3 ай бұрын

Great subject and video on point Connor... Been there done that, and it is one of the most difficult yet most important skill to learn and to develop. Thank you for the work you do Brother

@steveos5112 3 ай бұрын

Impulse control is really hard-on me. 😅

@kpec3 2 ай бұрын

Love's Been A Little Bit Hard On Me

@BoostedPastime 2 ай бұрын

Thank you Connor I needed to hear this.

@parallaxpoint 2 ай бұрын

Great video, and it loosened up some of the shame I have around this. Sometimes we also just need outlets for our energy. My impulse control was probably the worst when I just didn't have good outlets, but the energy needed a place to go.

@solid_treats4490 3 ай бұрын

12:11 Heard this referred to as "urge surfing" Even 20 minutes can be enough to get over a craving and gets easier the more often u practice

@eli7527 3 ай бұрын

thanks Conor I needed to hear this one

@fnatte4761 3 ай бұрын

Thank you for being what you are

@JackUrdahl 3 ай бұрын

Best video yet. I can relate because I’ve been through it myself. The issue is impulse control and the root cause is insecure attachment. Therapy is the answer.

@GeoffGaul 2 ай бұрын

Thank you!

@kpec3 2 ай бұрын

I love this suggestion. Definitely it will work.

@RubyWeapon614 3 ай бұрын

This is so true, I'm going through trying to learn this right now. It's not easy for sure! But hearing that I am on the right track is great motivation, so thank you!

@Saturntabbytype2 3 ай бұрын

I always think before being impulsive,does that still make me impulsive

@terenceboris851 3 ай бұрын

I’m pretty hard-working and disciplined. I have deep hobbies that keep my mind busy. I quit social media 3 years ago. Life is quiet and thoughtful. Women scare me sometimes.

@RobertWilcox-y5l 2 ай бұрын

Good video.

@solid_treats4490 3 ай бұрын

If you are living to do what you want when you want is to be a slave to your impulses. I appreciate this video and still deal with this impulsivity. Spending, drinking, smoking, eating, gaming, porn, to keep those feelings down.

@stevehancock7925 2 ай бұрын

Discipline is the most important skill for all men. The sooner you learn it the better off your will be.

@Saturntabbytype2 3 ай бұрын

I think I’ve just numbed it all off . But words really set me off .

@juanvaldez5422 2 ай бұрын

I don’t know if “impulse control “ is the best term . I think ‘compulsion’ may be a better descriptor . Getting caught in negative cycles and loops .

@roc-88 3 ай бұрын

3:37 Connor, can you make a video (or direct me to a video if you already made it) of the books that shaped your knowledge and wisdom on manhood?

@ManTalks 3 ай бұрын

I don't have one yet, but this is a great video idea. I'll put it together

@Sisyphus.. 3 ай бұрын

Depression

@pavschodyko6531 3 ай бұрын

Harsh delivery, but this is true.

@dja-juicepowersourceproduc2887 3 ай бұрын

Nice 👍

@olehfishchuk5680 3 ай бұрын

Stop willing popcorn. It’s a good, low calorie, healthy snack. If you’re in calorie deficit and have high hunger level due to it, popcorn is the best snack to keep you in a calorie deficit

@ManTalks 3 ай бұрын

It is. And, it's my kryptonite. I used to eat massive bowls of it every night at 10pm and would feel like shit. It's a solid snack though and one of my favs

@olehfishchuk5680 3 ай бұрын

@@ManTalks makes sense haha

@Muhammad-o1i 3 ай бұрын

May Allah Subhaan wa talaa guide you to islaam. The five daily prayers and fasting are very useful tools Un Avoiding Impulse. Also you learn about the three souls inside of you, the one that orders tou to do bad, the one that makes tou guilty etc.Appreciate your honesty, it takes a strong man to admit his imperfections, alot of people can relate to it.

@jrm13 3 ай бұрын

To best utilize these techniques and strengthen your impulse control: GET A GOOD NIGHT’S SLEEP. If you’re tired, you do not have the energy to regulate. You will revert to your bad habits 9 times out of 10. Get an old school alarm clock, put it in your room, and set a bedtime timer. That’s your cue to wind down, brush your teeth, and get ready for bed. Do NOT put it on your phone. Your phone is with you when you’re gaming; it’s too easy to turn off and ignore.

@my-rocket 3 ай бұрын

Lack of impulse control? That’s the proximal cause. The root cause is trauma in most cases. You have to address the root cause.

@ManTalks 3 ай бұрын

I agree that trauma and disconnection is often the cause of this lack of impulse control. Do you think most men can hear that?

@my-rocket 3 ай бұрын

@@ManTalks that falls into the category of “uncomfortable truths“, which fill our world. I’ve met many men who struggled with impulsive and compulsive behavior problems. It is rare to find any who are successful in the long term who have not addressed the trauma they carry with them. for me, it was no more difficult to start facing my trauma then it was to live the life, and the trauma in my life, which came from my impulsive and compulsive behaviors. One of the biggest traumas I faced was the realization that I did live in world which was grievously flawed, and none of the people who said they loved me had the courage it took to tell me the truth about the world or me. People do not believe they are bad or flawed if they understand they were abused and traumatized. They believe they are bad and do bad things, while they have no understanding of the pain they carry. It’s been with them all their life. It’s been part of the fabric of their soul. Telling people that they have been hurt is a kindness. Some might not be ready to recover, but hearing how other men, began to heal themselves the first step in the process. I know for me, I would have appreciated someone being kind to me decades ago, and telling me that I was hurt, that I did nothing to deserve it, it was not my fault, I don’t have to carry shame for what she did.