The PSYCHOLOGICAL TRICKS To Overcome Insecurity & Self-Doubt | Vanessa Van Edwards

[@chubstuf]

I listened to this at a slower speed so it would play all night. It was like being at a bar with a couple of moderately intoxicated friends and at the same time, recieving scientifically-based, beautifully presented life tips! Thank you both for really positive, interesting content.

[@lewishowes]

You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡

[@fifitesfatsion3428]

Thx for that advice ! I’m listening to it on .75 and it’s gives my adhd brain a chance to catch up 😂😂😭😭😭 Normally I would’ve stopped watching ! You might have just helped me have a breakthrough 🫶🏽🫶🏽

[@braxtonhull6962]

Some people are low-key giving me actual genius in the comments section. #Angels #ThisOneHere #Blessing #Yep

[@PaulBrawl-lc7gz]

Yes Mam was positive indeed makes me want to buy the book

[@Froglet1968]

I didn't even know you could change the speed. What a difference. Thank you! x

[@FertileG]

Control, Capability, and Optimization- They keys to happiness!

[@vanessam5392]

You both have a lot of chemistry!

[@Meg.1122]

Yes! You noticed it too? It's insane. It feels like they were on date xD

[@HolyCows666]

TRUEEEEE

[@hankhill3417]

Sexual kind. She appears to want to get some

[@Tlove724]

1000% 👀

[@tanadaievandervoetlyle4063]

Boy do they!I think they would make a good couple. 💯

[@swaraaaa]

I love the chemistry and level of comfort they have 😍❤️

[@backyardrailroader]

Control, capability, optionization. Key to happinesss.

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Indeed! ❤💛

[@lisanichols1744]

Vanessa where have you been all my life!! THANK YOU to both you and Lewis from the bottom of my awkward-person heart!! I'm going to get all your books.

[@samratsrajarya3489]

Communication skill of Vanesa is just woww😃😃

[@terryximenez4151]

No worries, Vanessa.I have always loved your content and your books.People crave this information.

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Oh! Yay! Thank you so much! That means a lot to me! 💖

[@SakinahIman]

OMG THIS WOMAN IS AAAAAHH MAAAYYY ZINGGGGG!!!! Definitely studying her books religiously!! 😆🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾

[@lewishowes]

🙌

[@dailydoseofmedicinee]

When we're confident, we're more likely to move forward with people and opportunities

[@onaeton3480]

Lll

[@onaeton3480]

)l)0l⁰0llll) 0l0l0

[@onaeton3480]

))

[@onaeton3480]

)l)

[@onaeton3480]

00

[@AliciaFleming-cp8hx]

I had to pause the video for a moment around 29 minutes, when Vanessa said "why don't you want to preplan". I used to plan out my days or weeks in advance, what I realized is that having a plan is a good thing, but a lot of times your plan doesn't work out due to outside factors such as a child getting sick at school and you have to go home, or an unplanned stop at the grocery store on the way home. At this point we try to plan a week in advance on everything sometimes more for events like vacations. One small thing can throw your week completely off, but if you have a basic outlined plan it is easier to get back on track instead of the rest of the week spiraling out of control.

[@lewishowes]

💯

[@PaulBrawl-lc7gz]

Y’all these are the people skills I have been looking for, cheers

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Amazing!! So happy this episode found you ❤

[@dalecomella2385]

I connected to this video immediately from the discussion about hand movement and communication based on my experience when enlisting in the army. Prior to that I had gone to school for business, marketing and teaching. I was a student teacher for preschoolers and kindergartens in 2004 and also a secretary in my working life (and then I enlisted in explosive ordnance disposal...ha... Quite a shift.... Teaching children to blowing things up and defusing bombs). My feedback was always positive, my communication was genuine and I was told that I provide great imagery and verbage for understanding. Since childhood, people commented on how much I talk with my hands, which they attributed to my Italian American background...I never noticed it....(they also said I blink really slowly 😅. I have no control over this.) ....Until 2005, when I enlisted. Soldiers must stand with their hands at their sides or behind their back. As I acclimated to this new posture, I found that I could not get my words (when I was even allowed to speak) from my mind to my mouth. I never had a problem communicating prior to this stage of life.... But it was nearly impossible for me to speak with cohesion and confidence while keeping my gaze straight forward (no direct eye contact), as required when communicating with military authority figures (people move their eyes for certain memory recall or creativity of thought). It took a long time for me to adjust. I had to practice what I would say in my mind over and over, but I always struggled with original creative thought on the spot if I couldn't move my hands. I'm sure the psychology of this was well understood to create submissiveness in subordinates, or it wouldn't be the foundation of military rank structure and communication. Can anyone else relate to this??

[@nicmatthews9721]

So interesting an insight!

[@123marchello]

Two amazing people, what a gift.💥

[@lewishowes]

Thank you for taking the time out of your day to check out the interview! So glad you enjoyed it🧡

[@brookeconway9114]

She may not believe it, but Vanessa is actually very charismatic herself!

[@MJFUYT]

Vanessa is brilliant.

[@sheilapauley5131]

I’ve picked these quos up all my life, starting with my family… Took me awhile to realize whether it’s my feeling or the person I’m interacting with!

[@todaywithmuhammadayubnawab3116]

It’s amazing podcast & my favorite topic, keep it up & love from Dubai

[@lewishowes]

So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.

[@ScienceOfPeople]

So glad you enjoyed! ❤

[@jennikasanon9189]

I Just Love You Two Together.

[@SalemSnow1]

26:20 - Focusing on negativity is a human survival instinct, driving us to seek out critics for self-preservation. This explains why even a small minority of detractors can trigger strong reactions, as historically, ignoring threats could be fatal. Consequently, public figures like rappers often respond to critics despite widespread support.

[@annettehurd9391]

She is so dang good!

[@lewishowes]

Thanks for being here!

[@frederickwood9116]

Lewis. You pretty much spelled out the golden nuggets that got you where you are in the first 40 min here. Really interesting and useful. Thanks for the insights. Please please. Take a look into compiling a package for kids as you talk to these impressive people. Think of the positive impact if our kids could be gently made aware of these aspects of their life experience. Thanks again for the material. Keep smiling.

[@lewishowes]

You're welcome, thank you for being here 🧡

[@jurina27nova]

Lewis this is one of my favorite podcasts from you loved it, I learned so much and enjoyed the interaction between you and Vanessa. Job well done, keep it up!!

[@lewishowes]

Thank you for taking the time out of your day to check out the interview! So glad you enjoyed it🧡

[@nathaliebomer1030]

I will have to watch this again to take it all in again but wowwww love this interview! 😀 as an introvert and tons of anxiety I am a work in progress. Thank you ever so much for having Vanessa on your show. She is a gem 💎

[@lewishowes]

Thank you for taking the time out of your day to check out the interview! So glad you enjoyed it🧡

[@hellomission8167]

i love you ms. vanessa❤

[@ScienceOfPeople]

That's heartwarming! Thank you ❤❤

[@juliaarian3868]

Vanessa is so amazing!!! I'm so happy I found her!! And they are so cute together

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Thank you! ❤

[@tracyhope3918]

Love this information - Thank you. Detecting lies doesn't follow the golden rules when interacting w neurodivergent people - autistic spectrum, even adhd & depression can be exceptions.

[@HAHA-kk2xy]

One of the best channels! Thank you Lewis!

[@lewishowes]

You're welcome,thank you for being here 🧡

[@SirJohann]

Damn this is so good! I had to replay it again in the background while I do my cleaning 💯

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Thank you for watching! I'm so glad you enjoyed it ❤

[@officiallydenise]

I’m so grateful for this channel 💕

[@lewishowes]

So glad you enjoy the channel! Thanks for being here!

[@Beela2020]

Amazing ❤ you can learn from here without even listening just watch carefuly her face mouvements smile...

[@MyBodyIsMyTemple]

Yes! I was thinking emojis and you covered it!

[@Sublocade_Injections]

Wow as talented and intelligent as she is, neuroscience research shows A) we are actually wired for POSITIVITY not negativity and even thinking is accurate can cause us to feel like victims B) we absolutely can rewire our brains using our thoughts after the same amount of time it takes to change any habit. We have more control of ourselves than we’re led to think. Brain imaging technology has shows in that time our brains have even restructured. I wish more people were knowledgeable about this since its completely empowering.

[@GloriaTorres8888]

I just loved this interview! Thanks!

[@lewishowes]

So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Yay! So happy to hear that ❤

[@AdiOrPazCoach]

This is incredible, simply super interesting ♥️♥️♥️ you guys rock!!! I just bought your amazing book Lewis Thank You

[@lewishowes]

Thank you and let me know your thoughts as you dig in!

[@AdiOrPazCoach]

@@lewishowes I am a David❤️🙏🏻Thank you for being you and for your journey

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Love to hear this ❤

[@lp9074]

This was so helpful but fun at the same time

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Yay!! I'm so glad it was both ❤

[@WendySvW]

You have to translate your books in dutch, its sooo great to learn these things! Thankyou:)

[@JaredJacobsonLaw]

Suppose diff context tho. Great content thx 🙏

[@lewishowes]

Thank you for watching! 🧡

[@KirkLeeSweet]

Wow the LinkedIn tips are really good

[@jemalhasen8521]

Thank you very much. I’m like my team today my birthday.

[@sashalemard9442]

Thank you Lewis and Vanessa! This was eye opening and interesting.

[@lewishowes]

You're welcome, thank you for being here 🧡

[@alibarrymusah7935]

I really appreciate this episode. Thank you Lewis

[@lewishowes]

You're welcome, thank you for being here 🧡

[@kellidickerson1429]

The store was Successories! Still around. But online only now. Great podcasts Lewis!

[@asandaamiyahmanqina9948]

Amazing information, it came a great time. Not sure how focused I will have to be for look at my date to see how truthful they are thats hard for me. But I definitely will use the self representation tips.

[@lewishowes]

Thank you so much for watching!

[@berryblusherr]

omg there is an electric connection here. i LOVEEEEEED this video omg

[@Honeybee8778]

What an excellent talk!

[@lewishowes]

Thank you!

[@exquisitelyelizabeth6531]

Loved this!!!

[@lewishowes]

Thanks for being here!

[@Meri_-]

Just wanna say thank you

[@aniruddhbadnikar6739]

Thank you for details and support

[@lewishowes]

You're welcome, thank you for being here 🧡

[@Iamcapable4]

Let’s get into it this week with our 🙌🏼 👀🧠😊💜

[@martina.b]

Great energy! Very informative and fun. Thanks 👍

[@olga6903]

This is literally gold! loved his compilation

[@lewishowes]

So happy you are enjoying the content. I would love for you to follow my page and leave me a review here: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/id596047499

[@Psycho_notes]

Thanks 🙏

[@lewishowes]

You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡

[@ScienceOfPeople]

❤

[@craigosterberg5045]

Thanks for interview

[@lewishowes]

You're welcome, thank you for being here 🧡

[@dalecomella2385]

Ha! When I made a profile on okcupid in 2020, the first thing I said that anyone should know about me is that I'm an infj. As a result, I got an overwhelming response from one man who said he was a fellow infj as his opening line and 'you won't be disappointed' as his closing line.... After two years of chaos, I realized he just had extreme narcissistic tendencies and was likely lying from the start by honing in on what was most important to me and saying that he was the same ... The start of the whole love bombing phase.... And then he took advantage of my authenticity, empathy, honesty and relentless ambition from that point on for his own personal gain/game. But I was so manipulated and confused, I couldn't grasp it.... Even after divorcing a man with narcissistic tendencies after 11 years of marriage three years prior. It's not easy to spot the similarities at the beginning because they each have their own language and manipulation routine, which seems genuine....I know I'm not the only one in this boat here.

[@saraburch5915]

I am open honest vulnerable sincere and genuine and got rail roaded and now question ever being myself again

[@hankhill3417]

Try dating a woman . Have you even tried 🐱? It’s pretty good 👍

[@adamkiefel79]

Great video and Very informative. Look forward to the book, and will jump onto Vanessa You tube. I struggle with a lot of these communication skills. This is a great insight.

[@lewishowes]

Thank you for being here 🧡

[@kaoutarkaoutar986]

slow nodding== keep going Fast nodding == finish up - In a business deal, you should finalize with a lower-strict tone; otherwise, it'd look like you're begging. -winners take as much space which makes them look confident and winners; observable by how much space between the ear and the shoulder.

[@SD-lr7sq]

This is a good podcast.

[@leapsill1969]

I totally agree 💯 but don’t use your hands and body when your hairdresser is trying to do your hair! Lol… I’m a 30 year hairdresser and all day I’m having to tell my clients to keep their hands still when talking or sharing their stories. lol!! But yes!! I totally love this and agree!!😊💯

[@lewishowes]

🙌

[@morgangates7350]

I ❤the hand hug they shared

[@lewishowes]

🧡

[@aliaisabel2923]

Makeup artist slayed.

[@leahannwhite1111]

Insecurity and self doubt is imagined.

[@yo_andersen608]

Wow❤❤❤ ..this is very interesting

[@lewishowes]

So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.

[@Plouton58]

thank you

[@lewishowes]

You're welcome, thank you for being here 🧡

[@Iamcapable4]

When you inhibit your hand gestures🙌🏼✌🏼☺️💜👀✅

[@yamazaki888]

Can you please interview the KZbinr thewizardliz ? She’s so amazing !! You two will make it amazing

[@mac-ju5ot]

The blinking thing we had a lot of people at work who use to blink to me in the office and little children do this too.I'm a ex preschool teacher

[@HapaxLegomenon12]

9.40 talks about the word challenge being a problem and immediately uses the words to get the audience to do something 😂 Tough habits to break. Interesting topic, hoping I can apply this!

[@stevehanson3170]

Successories I think was the name of the store that had the achievement oriented merchandise.

[@mysteerimyyra]

I come from a from a very introverted culture (finland) and we dont use hand gestures. Also our language is monotone.. and we dont even smile to unknown people. These things are very difficult for me as I didnt learn these from a young age.

[@ScienceOfPeople]

I totally hear you. It can be tough but they 100% can be learned with patience and practice.❤

[@wadeschoenthaler8796]

You can learn these with a little love

[@wadeschoenthaler8796]

I’m not a narrisist at all I love you all!

[@wadeschoenthaler8796]

Oh honey I can feel you

[@wadeschoenthaler8796]

Wow honey I want you to be ok

[@Art_of_Ramon]

Learn ASL and take your gestures to a whole new level.

[@selflove96]

Very helpful 👌

[@lewishowes]

Glad this was helpful for you! 🧡

[@chastityacosta6174]

love this

[@lewishowes]

Thank you!

[@monicabrante]

Love this!

[@lewishowes]

🧡

[@MichaelMillman]

Lewis, Successories was the name of the retail chain that sold motivational items.

[@theyetti90]

This is pretty helpful

[@lewishowes]

Glad this was helpful for you! 🙏

[@FertileG]

Good stuff... I plan to re-watch in the am and take notes 😆

[@RichRoutes]

Nice advices thanks!

[@jandreb895]

1:40 That's so funny 🤣 I laughed out loud with you guys!

[@HermesNautico]

1:15:02 - "Go make and experiment. [...] Experiments never fail". 2:25:00 = "Is it important to be charismatic?"

[@loveonolove]

Amazing!! Thank you so much 🤍

[@lewishowes]

You're welcome, thank you for being here🧡

[@claretroup1894]

I am dislexic to and loveing podcasts and audiobooks

[@2024.JR.Dev.AIopus]

OMG 00:22:15 Lewis says heres the thing. I like big Ideas and he has them and hires people that basically are executioners and he comes up with more ideas.....this is so me!! You are amazing Vanessa and So are you Lewis! i woukd love to hear how your existence now came from ??? do tell ...intrigue!

[@JaredJacobsonLaw]

Just occurred to me how the shame touch could be misconstrued with touching face for other reasons, like unconsciously putting up barrier when lying. Both indicating wanting to hide something but for different reasons

[@pranavdhumal437]

Your explanation is so comprehensible, clear and on point. Loved it, Thanks Venessa.😁🤍

[@lewishowes]

🙌

[@ScienceOfPeople]

You’re so welcome ❤

[@bashbro456]

Its cuz hes a great all his interviews with woman are like this. When your as balanced as him, chemistry is second nature

[@nashayamontaque5764]

come and do this study in my country Jamaica

[@MeganS1995]

Regarding personality, I don't think it's entirely true that we're wired for something or that we're stuck with a trait. We're all born with a temperament which does shape personality, but personality is also shaped by experience... Someone can become shy or more neurotic after a trauma, but that's not a permanent state. Sometimes by resolving underlying trauma and getting in touch with our Shadow self (refer to Carl Jung's archetypes) and individuating, we can actually reach a more authentic state of being. Limiting ourselves using labels or traits without doing the deeper work can make us feel stuck where we are, rather than encouraging growth.

[@gracerod2038]

Some bosses are just very mean and don’t care about no one but themselves. 😢

[@haileynichelle8343]

I don't know about blink rate being a sign of lying. If blink rate is connected to being nervous or processing information, maybe they are being truthful but they CARE A LOT about the outcome of their answer and realize that this is an important question that is being asked of them.

[@cassiefoster4501]

Law Enforcement incorrectly identify a person as a liar when they are in fact telling the truth 86% of the time when there are incongruencies between a person's words and their body language! A person with PTSD or other psychological barriers often have incongruencies in their body language. Talking to Strangers by Malcolm Gladwell.

[@Mamsh70]

I lost my confidence because of my x partners whom cheated me many times that lead to break ups.

[@melaniebenson8884]

I have the same experience.

[@isabelleong3666]

I’m the same hang in there

[@aylinurgun5244]

I feel same although I am higher than him

[@DageLV]

I don't actually use up-pitch on a lie. I down-pitch. In my mind yeah, thats a lie, I'm saying it, I'm doubling down. Take it or leave it.

[@Stellieyo]

Does she have a you tube? Would you mind linking her in your description?

[@Exotic_St4rxxx]

Just type in Vanessa Van Edwards

[@Stellieyo]

@@Exotic_St4rxxx he usually gives credit to those he interviews. It’s more about the principle.

[@itshanyb01]

I watched this video again I definitely understand it more at first I didnt get it that much because I was focus on my overall self confidence not my work but now I am easing on my work I finally understand this makes me want to lead someday

[@lewishowes]

Thank you!

[@davidnorman6887]

"Gifting" undeserved confidence to children instead of the value of competence....describes the last two generations.

[@cinemaximum5654]

U sound competent

[@carmene.7136]

Old episode???

[@gayatrinakar5049]

yeah it looks like an old episode

[@elladapetrosyan9610]

Yes, I remember this episode.

[@lewishowes]

Yes! We've had so many great episodes from over the years and wanted to bring back some of our best performing ones for you listen to! 🧡

[@FertileG]

Do you‐two have Chemistry 🤔❤️

[@behnamzarandi8031]

Art of manipulating people , with fake body language and lies . Lot's of psychopaths are taking notes. i like how she puts science, study and etc. before everything she says.

[@artfuldodger8389]

What's ur ideal personally match