The self-destructive nature of self-help

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Күн бұрын

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@NewtSlayer9001 10 ай бұрын

I've been feeling the same way lately. I find my desire to "prove myself" actually gets in the way of me enjoying my life.

@sophiasalazar9358 10 ай бұрын

Bro, so incredibly grateful for this channel and your presence -- feeling lost as a philosophy student facing the abyss of reality post undergrad...feeling seen thank you xxx

@DirkdeZwijger 10 ай бұрын

Great to hear this side of the story. I too fell in the self help trap and I agree with you. Nowadays it's hard to live 'authentically'

@Dextermxck 10 ай бұрын

One of the most thoughtful intellectuals on youtube, I love the way your express existentialist and nihilist views, I often try and find meaning and sometimes come the conclusion of those in which you presented in your other videos, however it is in a thoughtful and logical sense to which I'd probably never do it. I simply just decide what matters oppose to external pressures of meaning.

@siezgrywam 10 ай бұрын

damn i rlly like your style - of expressing yourself and editing, can't wait to watch more of your videos :0

@mostly_happy4248 10 ай бұрын

Really interesting, you make great points! I'll go on an unethically long self-indulgent rant in your comment section now, if you don't mind. This isn't really even what you talk about in the video, but I think it's interesting: I once heard that somewhere during Aristotle's time people had an idea of what the perfect version of them would look like, and I've found it a super useful tool in determining what I want to actually spend time on. When I think about what the idea of that perfect person is from the perspective of the average self-help person, I find that (for me) way too much emphasis is placed on productivity and the "end" you work towards. Like, the things to strive for are often things like scheduling, exercising, doing stocks and shit, etc. You build habits to become as productive as possible so that one day you don't have to do anything anymore. I think that fact, that the end goal is that you don't have to do the things you're doing now, can be really harmful, 'cause for those illusive Greeks I keep referring to, the end goal isn't really supposed to be a thing you actually get to. (I really don't know if this was an actual thing anyone thought but I'm like 70% sure it was) Like, the average Andrew Tate fan could say something like "One day I'll be rich and famous and have a girlfriend and then I'll be happy and not have to do anything. But for now I just have to keep working out, keep dropshipping and keep grindin". When you imagine that that end goal isn't really even supposed to be achievable, the problem becomes apparent: you're not enjoying what you're constantly doing. Dropshipping isn't really what you want to do, 'nothing' is what you want to do, or what you think you want to do. (try doing nothing for a few days it kinda sucks) Here's a counter-example. I'd personally love to be better at playing the guitar. Why? I dunno, I kinda just like playing the guitar. How do I achieve this goal? Play more guitar. This makes sense, right? My "perfect self" isn't one where I've mastered the guitar completely and have nothing more to do, then I couldn't do the thing I actually want to. I don't play the guitar because I want to eventually stop playing, I just enjoy the practice in itself, and the improvement is a nice bonus. I personally prefer this kind of method compared to the other one (and I'm sure there are others I'm unaware of and that it's not this simple). It can be applied to other areas as well: I work out because I want to work out, I don't trade stocks because that sounds like the most boring bullshit imaginable. I really enjoy finding new ways of thinking and challenging myself, so I study philosophy and go to therapy etc. Does this make any sense? Like, you could go to therapy because you want to "fix" yourself and eventually "not have to" go to therapy, but that runs the risk that you don't enjoy going to therapy, and then don't get anything out of it. It would still be self-improvement but it just kinda sucks in my opinion. This also works with your problem with feeling like hanging out with friends isn't productive. It's hard to apply that idea of a "goal" to your friends, it's not like you hang out with someone in order to get some sort of soulmate so that you don't have to hang out with them anymore. It's even more obvious in this case that the "end-goal" isn't actually desirable, because hanging out with people is fun, but the problem then is that, because the goal doesn't make sense, it doesn't make sense to work towards getting friends either. However, if we switch the end-goal from "I want a soulmate" to "I want to hang out with friends and get to know them better", ta-da, it makes sense again. Hopefully what I'm saying isn't extremely obvious, 'cause I know it wasn't for me. Of course you'll have to do things that are unfun, but minimizing those things and maximizing the things that bring you joy doesn't really sound like the worst thing imaginable. Oh also if I'm wrong somewhere or if you could think about this differently I'd love to know. Wait okay fuck this might just be hedonism or something but I spent way too long writing this so whatever.

@LucasCorso91 10 ай бұрын

Gabor Mate is really good! I believe our trauma gives us a purpose in life .. to heal. That’s what we came here for.

@davidtyer2373 4 ай бұрын

I think that the recent generations are stuck in a transitional period of history that is denying them a traditional frontier of the sort that we evolved to pursue, while simultaneously tantalizing all of us with more possibilities to engage with than we evolved to pursue. Now that I think of it, that kind of lines up with your video about curating our choices rather than trying the latest fad dopamine diet program. But getting back to my original idea that made me want to comment, I think what we all "secretly" (forgive the caginess) want is a giant societal disruption that destroys relationships in society that we perceive in some cases subconsciously as having developed in a landscape disconnected with reality. Or to put it another way, we all want to be Henry David Thorough, and notch something on our stick too, even though the reality as far as I can see of transcendentalism is that only when we are suffering are we really transcending anything. As soon as we feel we've won some hard won battle in life, we NEED to notch it on a stick BECAUSE we can't stay in that moment and we think that's how we can bring ourselves back to feeling empowered as we were at winning the battle. Yet only in the "pain" of striving are we actually ever going to be fulfilled (not the way I want it...just can't escape it yet). We must feel hopeless in order to then feel success. One further slightly concerning point is that all the online video is enabling a new kind of addiction, wherein the viewer is attempting to "live" through the experiences vlogged about by the content creator. This goes way deeper into the doo-doo than just dopamine drowning, imo.

@gorkemaramaz873 10 ай бұрын

actually intro is like a horror movie

@asdasdasdasdasdasd3485 10 ай бұрын

Great video, keep it up!!!

@ajmosutra7667 10 ай бұрын

Like a lot of your vids. Keep it up 👍 maybe put some celebrities or social movement to gain momwntum. Really like the intertqine of technology

@ajmosutra7667 10 ай бұрын

And academics

@celine_marie 10 ай бұрын

Aw thanks! Appreciate the comment!

@cantescape4310 10 ай бұрын

Are you currently employed Celine?

@celine_marie 10 ай бұрын

Yep

@kalonecho 5 ай бұрын

and not buying a red light device I'm dead I laughed too hard

@tonywalton1052 10 ай бұрын

Anthony Robbins gives me anxiety

@obrotherwhereartliam 2 ай бұрын

The reason I think Byung Chul Han’s analysis isn’t effective is because his solutions are largely failures. A burnout society is one in which a solution has yet to be found and a perverse striving is considered a good enough substitute.