The standoff between men and women: how to sell a burning house

[@psychacks]

The contemporary sexual marketplace is witnessing a Mexican standoff between men and women. Women want men to "do better," and men want women to be reasonable. Both sides are increasingly comfortable remaining single until their demands are met. In this episode, I discuss the way out of this standoff by examining how the power differential between men and women changes as a function of time. If your house is on fire, then you need to be a motivated seller. Pre-order my book: amzn.to/3UlsTsY Book a paid consultation: oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Subscribe to my newsletter: oriontarabanpsyd.com Social Media Facebook: facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Instagram: instagram.com/psyc.hacks Twitter: twitter.com/oriontaraban Website: oriontarabanpsyd.com Orion's Theme: kzbin.info/www/bejne/jaO7c62HZ613e7M Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: stellargre.com. Become a Stellar affiliate and earn a 10% commission for every membership purchased by a new student you conduct into the program: stellargre.tapfiliate.com. GRE Bites: www.youtube.com/@grebites4993 Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community: kzbin.info/door/SduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXwjoin Sound mixing/editing by: valntinomusic.com Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world. #dating #men #women

[@thordivdev]

Can you link the video you mentioned?

[@summersday7894]

Eh! I don't see the problem. Everyone will either get what they want or be happy single.

[@edheldude]

​@@summersday7894Most childless people regret not having children and people will be very unhappy with little incentives to create a meaningful life if you bypass the main thing in life.

[@awsambdaman]

Orion is it possible that our ancestors figured this out and that’s why women weren’t allowed to work? Like if the expectation was every woman made zero dollars in the market, then women could marry any man and still fulfill her hypergamous need? I’m not saying it’s an ethical solution, but maybe it’s the least bad one considering all the stability and prosperity monogamy brings?

[@edheldude]

@@awsambdaman What are you talking about? Women have always worked as most people in history lived on farms in an agrarian society. Women outside farms did the same jobs as now: teaching, nursing, serving, s"x work etc.

[@7184610369]

I have a 37 year old sister and this is absolutely true. As she got older, the quality of men she could attract kept getting worse (although she's in denial).

[@perpetualprocrastinator]

No women understand the situation very well , their pride will not let themselves be vulnerable in front of men be it the brother, father , husband ..whatever.

[@summersday7894]

​@@perpetualprocrastinator lol what?!

[@georgedang449]

​@@perpetualprocrastinator Confirmation bias - all leftover women are leftover because they don't understand it. Women who do understand it, married young. The smartest women marry as virgins - Free +3 ticket given to everyone, instantly move from 5 to 8 on quality scale when it comes to marriage.

[@mani-00]

my sister was in the same boat, but at 42 years she got with a man that she wouldn't have considered a few years back, he is a nice and decent dude tho, now she is happily married and got her most precious wish...she got a son that she loves to death ♥ she is just among the 5% of the women population worldwide that could have a natural pregnancy after 40yo

[@onward2727]

@@perpetualprocrastinator massive insecurity and very fragile egos. And yet they behave like children and call us names and say we’re fragile and insecure smh When really we were all willing to legitimately take them in and love them. But they began the pushing away. They started the division. Yet they blame us for men and women drifting apart Can’t they for once look inward and be self aware and take accountability? I know they hate it. But for once, for the sake of the entire world lol, could they for once take a step back and evaluate?

[@arkansastrey9694]

If she takes the lower offer , men still end up with a bitter woman that always feels like she was strong-armed into taking a low ball, and she will always walk around "available " and open to other men's potential offers

[@greenfinmusic5142]

Because she was intentionally brainwashed to be that way by the ultra powerful men who run our society. The women (and low tier men) are being used as pawns of war and don't even realize it.

[@georgedang449]

This is why pride is a sin.

[@richien8472]

So it's best to let her be

[@marriagecausesdivorce7540]

Great point. This is probably why simping back fires long term. Simps pedestalize women and the end up losing their money, house and kids 10 years later in divorce.

[@cosmictreason2242]

That's why you only accept a wmn who is already serving you and demonstrating humility in exchange for nothing.

[@josephmauvais5500]

They can't see that their house is burning because of cheap likes and attention on social media

[@seanfobbs7575]

Exactly

[@marriagecausesdivorce7540]

The wall is coming. Menopause and ovulation failure is real.

[@baffinsansterre]

SM is a distraction/sedation for women.

[@talleneagle1974]

They don't know how to tell the difference between a man just wanting sex and a man who will want a relationship too. They are low hanging fruit for the top guys and don't understand they're average because every guy wants sex and think they're worth more than they actually are because they have options.

[@AfriqueNY]

And men don't see that women now want to make the offer. Let them

[@Nordic_Sky]

In southern California, women in their 40s are still saying the men's offers are too low.

[@georgedang449]

Already past expiration date - no more children, no shared future. The house is now worth nothing.

[@nikeisagreekgoddess4135]

If you're still listening to them, does that mean they're still fuckable?

[@simontmn]

I knew a woman in California who got wise just in time, left her exec job with Apple, moved to Atlanta. Man, marriage, baby (at 42).

[@ZoldicsDiaries]

😂😂😂.

[@ZoldicsDiaries]

​@@simontmn baby at 42?😂

[@jchoi9340]

Everything you said is logical and makes perfect sense, which is why women will never understand it.

[@brandoncrooks1681]

Why would you comment this

[@johnnyfuentes888]

@@brandoncrooks1681because it’s true

[@vibhaverma2659]

If you were a woman, you might find it hard to digest this piece of truth because it essentially says lower your guns and accept the first reasonable offer you get. It's an emotionally hard thing to accept.

[@rayzerot]

Women will never understand it? Or they'll pretend that they don't understand it?

[@vibhaverma2659]

Acceptance takes time. And when you say women will never "understand" it. You have generalised a statement for an entire gender and called them incapable of using any intellect, not the wisest statement to make. "Some women might never understand it" would have been more objectively accurate.

[@spa6hetti]

That analogy was perfect. The one factor it doesn't really account for is the fact that the family laws have driven many of us away from the market altogether.

[@steveunderhill5935]

Analogy was half right at best. Post fire you would still own the lot and would be able to rebuild for less than the price of new lot w house=apples vs oranges.

[@oyinloyeademola7086]

He who feels it knows it ! The family law is against menfolk.

[@daszieher]

​@@steveunderhill5935after my first divorce, I vowed never to get married again. Now, with my ex girlfriend, I'm just paying off her payments to the house and get to keep the thing. Much, much better than getting kicked out, having to pay anyway. Also, my money is in my company, so whatever I could have earned, I never did.😉

[@marriagecausesdivorce7540]

Family laws can be minimized to some extent. 1. Choose a woman who is mentally and emotionally stable, i.e. calm, peaceful, agreeable. 2. Don't get married. And 3. only have 1 kid to minimize any future child support. I messed up on 1 and 2, and have pretty much ruined my life.

[@marriagecausesdivorce7540]

@@steveunderhill5935 You're taking the example too literally. Obviously, in real life, women go through the menopause and therefore can't rebuild.

[@lewishorsewell8852]

The wall is undefeated

[@summersday7894]

Just as long as you can admit that you've hit it!

[@nikeisagreekgoddess4135]

The wall is being pushed back by all these educated, wealthy and single women who can afford cosmetic procedures and freezing their eggs. They ain't the majority, but they sure are dents on your argument and as time passes, it will increase given how much more they are going to college.

[@PolishBehemoth]

This punchline has gotten really annoying on youtube. I personally have seen many stunningly attractive women in their late 30s and early 40s and even late 40s. Some of them ive slept with. The whole notion of "the wall" is that after a certain age say 30 or 35 that women are completely and totally unnatractive and useless and not worth being with. I have personal experience that counters that and shows middle agr and older women typiclaly do more for the man and not less. Also this dynamic os very different with women in poorwr countrys.

[@SirShiv7]

@@PolishBehemoth "Some of them ive slept with. .." Then you're demonstrating the reality of 'the wall' without understanding what it really means. The 'wall' is not that women get so ugly no one wants to sleep with them, it means they've aged out of anyone of any worth taking them seriously for anything other than that.

[@eQuariuz]

@@PolishBehemoth The "wall" is just an indicator of a woman out of her prime SMV, it doesn't mean a guy wont ejaculate all over her face. It's also used in conjunction with a woman trying to "settle" on a beta guy whom she wouldn't have given the time of day to while in her SMV prime. The fact that you find some or even most of them "stunning' is irrelevant to the concept of a woman "hitting the wall".

[@SirShiv7]

It's only a standoff if both sides refuse to move. Women are refusing to move, men are refusing to participate - that's not a standoff, that's a fallout.

[@vibhaverma2659]

True!!

[@darthcholo]

The standoff is between women and the very few men they actually want and NOT the men they actually deserve. The men they deserve are willing and ready to wife them up.

[@GabeSeamless]

Best breakdown of what's really going on.

[@PolishBehemoth]

This is a great point because women are making all kinds of moves to get a woman.

[@drunkduck]

I'd rather crawl out through the fallout than deal with women anymore.

[@rebekkaswan]

I’ve had better men be interested in me as I’ve gotten older because my character and nature has improved. I’ve done my healing, so I’m very pleasant, charming and kind. And as men get older, they realize the value of love and a good character. I’ve also gotten more beautiful because of changing my diet and taking excellent care of myself. Also, the thoughts we think and how we feel affect how we look so beauty on the inside, often spills out to beauty on the outside.

[@chadbradford616]

The issue I have with your analogy is this: While their house is burning, rather than put the fire out as quickly as possible, most modern women would take selfies of themselves in front of their burning houses and post the videos to social media while complaining that there no men will put out the fire for free. And other women would validate and encourage their behavior.

[@johnmuniz328]

I agree

[@muyleche6466]

😂😂😂 💯

[@thedevilsadvocate3710]

Have you ever heard of the crabs in a bucket analogy? The analogy applies perfectly to women.

[@DeShonDixon]

Then sir simp a lot would come out the woodworks and put out the fire for her 🤣

[@thomasdee1980]

I think you are half right. I would bet back in ancient Rome, the homeowner would appeal to the spectators and they would all agree that Crassius is an asshole and he should put out the fire and if he won't, the homeowner should let it burn down as a point of principle. When the fire was over, the homeowner would be left with a pile of ash while the crowd would go home and know if their house was on fire, they would accept the first offer as it si easier to tell someone to stick to their principles rather than actually do it yourself. The reason why I think you are half right is that women are all deluded as they don't realise that all their houses are on fire and they all need to settle sooner rather than later. It is all still pride as they can't handle the idea that as time goes on, they are becoming less attractive

[@Khan-rz8qi]

On the opposite side, for a lot of us men who have a lot to offer, especially in terms of assets and tangibles, the legal risks are too high. What’s in it for us? Women want the ultimate prize,(ring) but majority of the time break their oaths and still take you to court anyway, a territory where they know they’re bound to win. Doesn’t matter what women want for this demographic of men, until the laws change where we men get more protection and incentives, the deal with NEVER be good enough. The men who women desire the most, have the most to lose.

[@carlospita6442]

I agree with you

[@ripley7t429]

Yep, pays to be stealth in today's society as well. Keeps the gold-diggers away. The legal/social issues weighed against us will not be corrected in my lifetime. I choose to keep my earnings.

[@mrquick6775]

@@ripley7t429Facts! In fact this will never be corrected. It will burn until everything is destroyed. (Rome is burning to the ground)

[@9avedon]

@@ripley7t429 That only works if your Chad !

[@whatsittoya-g4s]

if the house is not worth the ring. do not offer it. if the house is worth a relationship with benefits that doesn't jeopardize your assets, unrecognized by the state. make the offer. Its on them say no and watch it burn. I believe we need a lot more of these offers made to bring the market into check.

[@cncspeakers1664]

What Orion is saying is 100% correct. The answer is for woman to adjust to fit the market place but they will not do that. What your really asking is for woman to change their ingrained belief system embedded in them from every cultural crap hole in western media. Almost no woman do this, they don't have to to survive so wont. Men self reflect and adapt because they have too to survive, Woman will watch the video and get mad, Perhaps 1% might understand and say, oh crap he is right but that would be a woman around 33 years old and realizing the facts of life are real. To bad this video could not be played in every high school health class.

[@1Plebeian]

Yes. You reap what you sow. An inaccurate and terrible portrayal of the nature, past, and present of the two sexes was sold. Now the bill is coming due. You have to focus on telling a better story to NEW generations, because the damage has been done with the prior generations. This is a huge reason why family units are so important in successful cultures, you need NEW generations in order to have adaption occur. Start stretching out the time frames and you get an ossification of the old framework.

[@payamism]

33? no, if a woman figures this out, she is perhaps in her 60s. Most women live a very delusional life.

[@talleneagle1974]

They haven't got a clue, they'll say but i have men wanting to be with me multiple times a day i get hit on all the time i have so much value I've got a lot of men who want me. They never understand that the men are just trying to get laid and don't want to buy the cow anymore because the cow just keeps getting bigger and wanting more money or leaves you for no reason and takes half your stuff and the cow can never be happy.

[@westcedar]

Nailed it! My lady left at age 33 to find a man who wants kids. Bye !

[@PB_324]

😂😂😂 Men NEVER self reflect. Most of you are incapable of deep thought.

[@Highintensityhealth]

Brilliant! I wish more women in their 20s and 30s took this advice seriously.

[@erendiraperez9455]

I’m glad I found you. My intention is to think out of the box ( different, open minded) and be knowledgeable in terms of understanding men better. I love your anecdotes, this one makes sense, unfortunately social media is trying to convince women to be prideful , and not accepting the bare minimum and bla bla . I’m just here learning and trying to not to be brainwashed. Thank you 🙏🏽

[@awsambdaman]

A woman who has lowered her gun (or maybe you never had it raised in the first place)! Props to you, if you seek to understand how men think you’ll have much better relationships. Here’s to hoping you get yourself a good one.

[@erendiraperez9455]

@@awsambdaman Thank you for sharing. It is not easy when you hear to do the opposite, but I am very open to learn.

[@dekev7503]

@@erendiraperez9455I wish you all the best honey

[@rhenriksen]

It's so refreshing to hear from a woman like yourself! You've found a great channel to follow. Best of luck to you. There are two things I've learned to require from a woman: a willingness to take accountability when appropriate, and the capacity & willingness to apologize. Adopt those two things, and men will see you as a unicorn.

[@erendiraperez9455]

@@rhenriksen I appreciate it! I will take your suggestions into account. I like to be responsible for my actions and apologize when is necessary . We are humans at the end of the day we make mistakes, but it is never too late to learn. My intention is to be compassionate , understandable, respectful . Slowly I am learning.

[@allnotathome]

I'm reminded of Hoeflation-meme. Sadly, lot of those burning houses on the market come with termite and cockroach infestation, leaking roof and extensive water damage, uninsulated windows, and unruly drug-addled neighbours.

[@michaeljmyers1995]

Random comment but do you think a roach infestation is hard to kill than a termite infestation?

[@mujtabaahmadi7960]

That’s not a house anymore.

[@marriagecausesdivorce7540]

Marrying a single mom = using another man's tooth brush. Don't do it gentlemen. Do not give Chad and Tyrone's leftovers your commitment. Chad's trash is not your treasure.

[@Doberman_6773]

@@marriagecausesdivorce7540 *DO NOT* be Mr. Cleanup.

[@JeffersonRah]

Both are something i wouldn't want to deal with. Walk away ​@@michaeljmyers1995

[@whiskybravo4648]

The title made me laugh. How to sell a burning house lmao.

[@pmaitrasm]

😅😅😅

[@-441-]

Great title analogy 🤣🤣

[@plainluke722]

Genius lol

[@typatrice]

😂😂😂

[@mavrk.d]

Damn this video is top tier. It’s not even about whether they’re willing to watch their house burn though. It’s whether they’re willing to live with their lives after the house has burn. I don’t think women know what it truly means to be lonely like men do.

[@tomyoung8563]

It does seem like men are better at the “will die alone” game

[@georgedang449]

​​@@tomyoung8563That house builds slower but also burns far slower. Men can still have health children at 70, but 35 is geriatric pregnancy, at 40, it's over for 92% of women. "Die alone" lasts a few years for men, more than half a lifetime for women.

[@ceeIoc]

Women have the highest rates of anti depressant use. They escape through continuous dopamine spikes via social media validation, alcohol and girls trips.

[@M0viLover]

As Terrance Popp preaches: *40 to 80 is a loooooonnnngg time!!*

[@marriagecausesdivorce7540]

Single women have loads of single women and divorced women friends. They are perfectly fine being single and childless. In fact, the % of single and childless women is expected to continue to increase going forwards. The only thing they will miss is male attention once they hit the wall.

[@vtc8570]

You can ignore reality, but you can't ignore the consequences of ignoring reality.

[@vincentdenboer1451]

All of your videos been extremely valuable! I pirated your book because Amazon would not sell it to me in Spain (and I won't put up with their DRM), so here's it's price and then some :) Keep it up!

[@gabbyngu7956]

I just sent a text to my partner to stop my house from burning down, and it worked. From a female fun. Thanks for your incredible advice 👏 ❤

[@verb0ze]

😂😂😂

[@gabbyngu7956]

@verb0ze 😂😂😂 I had too even if I get it for a discount its better than ashes 😆. Are you from Ghana?

[@Straga_Severa_]

Well, you are a wise woman. =-)

[@ryuharuentertainment]

What a perfect analogy! Can't wait to hear this one.

[@233kosta]

They're right - we're not "good" any more. We spent our youth punished for being "good", while these women rewarded "bad" men. We learn from our mistakes.

[@JS-pn5cn]

Exactly right. I don’t know many men who are inclined to take on the burden of a woman with relationship scars from the very men for whom she rejected him (or somebody like him) years before. Many of the men who were “good” didn’t or don’t even register as “men” in the first place to the average Western woman.

[@Shifft-This]

@@JS-pn5cn It goes further than that. The women then expect those "good" men to help them "heal" all the scars they got by rejecting the "good" men in the first place.

[@danofthedead1979]

This is just unhealthy bitterness

[@233kosta]

@@danofthedead1979 Nah dude, it's my villain arc

[@ranglumoje5649]

We do not reward them, they are simply more attractive and we naturally want a piece of it 😀

[@carlospita6442]

But the big question is what’re men getting from the deal ?? Men not only have to be attractive , they also have to be tall , charismatic, fun , and have resources while women just have pretty? So how’s this a good deal for males ??

[@MilosStojanovicSrb]

Men get a pretty woman. And hopefully some other nice attributes: feminine, tender, good in sex, good friend... That is actually what we want more than anything else in the world...

[@Ideophagous]

Men just have to be confident and have their affairs in order. That includes things like good hygiene and mental health, as well as finances. The rest is sometimes just women shit testing you, to see if you'll lose confidence and start stuttering if they mention that you're short or fat or whatever. Make a joke about it and move on. Of course, the better you already handled your own shit, including past traumas and weaknesses, the better prepared you'll be for such situations. There are of course women who are totally turned off if you're not 6 foot tall and have tons of money and charisma, but those are rare, and if you get rejected by one of them, just move on.

[@mrquick6775]

Yes for the most part, but then there’s a level of physical attractiveness that will breakthrough all that height stuff.. In fact I’m only 5’8-5’9 and I have never once had a woman reject me for my height. Hell, when they see my face they forget about all that. They say things like: “You’re the best looking man I’ve seen around here in YEARS!!” “Mr Quick, you are a VERY nice looking man” “Wow, you are such a GREAT LOOKING GUY”! When I see men complaining about height, I know automatically that they are either: Facially challenged, overweight, have bad teeth or some combination of bad features that they have not addressed. Also, lots of men are not getting in the gym and looksmaxxing to the fullest extent. Finally, and this may seem contradictory but women lump things like height into the same category as looks bro! That’s why you see ugly men with HEIGHT with pretty women as well!

[@mrquick6775]

Yes for the most part, but then there’s a level of physical attractiveness that will breakthrough all that height stuff.. In fact I’m only 5’8-5’9 and I have never once had a woman reject me for my height. Hell, when they see my face they forget about all that. They say things like: “You’re the best looking man I’ve seen around here in YEARS!!” “Mr Quick, you are a VERY nice looking man” “Wow, you are such a GREAT LOOKING GUY”! When I see men complaining about height, I know automatically that they are either: Facially challenged, overweight, have bad teeth or some combination of bad features that they have not addressed. Also, lots of men are not getting in the gym and looksmaxxing to the fullest extent. Finally, and this may seem contradictory but women lump things like height into the same category as looks bro! That’s why you see below average looking men that have HEIGHT with pretty women as well!

[@mrquick6775]

Why KZbin why??

[@AndrewAdawa]

Logic wins for men. Stay with your logic when dealing with women. Switch off your emotions

[@bsdiceman]

what??

[@LucasHLopez]

@@bsdiceman a newbie here hah

[@Kim-vw4nx]

Men think they are logical . That’s why men do the things they like SA their own children , other ppls children,corpses , their patients in their dental and doctor offices and most recently on their actual surgery table 🤷🏽‍♀️.

[@summersday7894]

Ladies, do the same. Eff your feelings and get that bag!!!

[@sdmoore89]

Logic sounds good until you consider the comparison of a building to a human being. I don't think it's wise for the man or woman if the woman settles on the man because it's the best offer she could get at the time. That usually leads to the woman resenting the man and neither party being happy.

[@johnasamoah8668]

4:00 - 5:15 Dr. Orion tariban’s acting background making itself known

[@DaddyShegz]

real talk

[@ravazoid469]

My thoughts exactly

[@marse7092]

Fantastic presentation here! Very entertaining to watch 😂

[@icekills1]

Face expression is on point😄

[@TheTrendDoctor]

Glad someone else saw jt

[@derwoodhamburger]

Men can't back down, otherwise we wouldn't be strong men. We just have to become the best version of ourselves, stay mission focused and women can either capitulate or continue to live a miserable life. No retreat, no surrender

[@marriagecausesdivorce7540]

Try telling simps to hold the line. Simps can't help it, they have to put women on a pedestal. However it will ultimately back fire when they lose their money, house and kids in divorce.

[@derwoodhamburger]

@marriagecausesdivorce7540 yes they add to the inflation, but those simps get ghosted and friendzoned eventually. Stay strong and play the long game

[@VaronPlateando]

well... if xx.s sincerily come to cooperate, that doesn't imply capitulation, just some fundamental reason. the ones who opinionate differently in this are deliberately or just implicitly opting for doom. alright then, nothing to care for, be they gone. this is 'behavioral sink' trajectory in winter now, and xx.s won't make it out thereof either, i.e. 'future being female' won't happen.

[@VaronPlateando]

@@marriagecausesdivorce7540 they don't need to continue simping as long as can til doom, though. addictions can be mitigated, with will (and support) to do so.

[@andrasbiro3007]

It's not a war, you know. With this attitude you'll die lonely too. That's a miserable life for you too.

[@BooyahStan]

That's a powerful idea I'm sure most women will refuse.

[@jpolancoj]

This only pertains to shallow people. Women who are only looking for financially security and men that are only looking for trophy wives. If you’re actually looking for a companion and someone who is going to be your best friend, a lot of this does not matter or matters very little in comparison.

[@kimberlymasseur1615]

I enjoy majority of your videos, but this one was actually my favorite so far. It kind of hits on a component when we interact with other people whatever that interaction is that if we’re working as hard as we can on us, but it’s easier to spot other people that are doing the same. Thank you for the wonderful video Dr. Orion.

[@rickg7838]

Most probably, the most powerful video you have made up to this point. Bravo

[@jdheryos4910]

Yes sir, if you take out the laws, you are totally correct. Yet we live in a world of laws and the laws make any longer term solutions between the common man and the common woman impossible. Not only is the marriage contract unconscionable, relationship laws from Scandinavia to Australasia have made defacto marriage and even long term relationships (without living with each other) now equally penalised as a 'relationship divorce.' Their is no legal, commercial or financial incentive for women to change and thier is even less for men to accept judicial kamakazi doomed relationships. I know you try with genuine sincerity however, the meritorious talented 20% of men women find attractive have nothing to offer the common man.

[@levismirnoff5450]

If you live in a country with common law marriage you have to consider moving.

[@georgedang449]

Marriage rate in France is now down to 3%.

[@pro5702]

@@georgedang449Is this a real statistic?

[@Justsayin2000]

Orion, I am taking steps to be a good partner to a man and I want something healthy. I just keep running into bitter angry people. It is hard to stay hopeful. I appreciate the videos and effort to have a middle ground.

[@Cedartreetechnologies]

I think you need a new YT name. The existing one makes men think "boxwine". Just sayin.

[@TheNanoCarbon]

Thanks!

[@thewildhawaiian1425]

Your channel is gold to me Dr Taraban. I've been watching all your videos and plan to buy your book. This one is just what I needed.

[@sithraeil]

Woman+time=old woman. It's not rocket science

[@purplesprigs]

According to a John-Hopkins study, 50% of American women (HALF!) have had sex for the last time (their choice) by age 50. It only gets worse past that. If you can ignore the obesity, wrinkles, and putrid attitude, you still are not getting any. I know countless men (50+) in sexless marriages. If you are not married, don't. If you are, start planning for divorce.

[@daszieher]

keep'em fresh!

[@steveross4151]

😂😂

[@toriandjojo2018]

Men + time= old man

[@AfriqueNY]

​@@toriandjojo2018 old men have value. I didn't make the rules. Robert Dinero did. Lol

[@LucasPawlik]

The Roman forces were decisively defeated at Carrhae by the Parthian general Surena Crassus attempted to negotiate his retreat, but during the parley, a scuffle broke out, leading to his capture and death. Accounts of his death vary, with one particularly vivid and perhaps apocryphal tale stating that the Parthians killed him by pouring molten gold down his throat as a symbolic punishment for his greed. The defeat at Carrhae was one of Rome’s worst military disasters, and Crassus’s death marked the end of the First Triumvirate, altering the power dynamics within the Roman Republic. This event paved the way for the subsequent conflicts between Caesar and Pompey, ultimately leading to the end of the Roman Republic and the rise of the Roman Empire.

[@immortaljanus]

Historically accurate. Not important to this discussion though.

[@LucasPawlik]

@@immortaljanus wait and see Remember it is the end of the metaphor :-)

[@Mary-t2p6p]

Ok your supposition is that women and men nowadays are not desperate to marry. It could very well be argued that most people value themselves too high in terms of what they have to offer in a relationship. If they are not desperate to marry why would a woman take a low offer. Many older or plainer women have more to offer in other areas than physical looks. They have a maturity of what the world is like and how things proceed, they may own a house, a car, and have a good paying job. Or they may have the most important gift to bring to a relationship with a man: peace and joy. A beautiful woman in your home is not necessarily a happy, peaceful person. What determines that gift is the woman herself. Find someone with those qualities and she will look better and better to you as you compare your life to your miserable neighbor who went for a beautiful but miserable woman. Now that’s a real Burning House waiting to happen.

[@XristosArgyropoulos]

​@@Mary-t2p6p Quite bold to assume that an old woman has any of the virtues you described Usually they become resentful and bitter as they age alone Also her higher body count is a big problem for any relationship Her house is on fire and the value goes down not only on looks Her good paying job is of no concern, after all: "her money is her money, but his money is OUR money" Also women with money don't want a useless 500$ bag They want a useless 5000$ Gucci bag It's harder to keep them happy

[@LucasPawlik]

@@Mary-t2p6p I am never sure; are you a chatbot? I never met a woman who was happy for long. There a few exceptions

[@Guildofarcanelore]

There are more girls turning 21 every day. Men can wait. It is what it is.

[@levismirnoff5450]

This is only true if a man is high value though

[@blastermaster7261]

​@@levismirnoff5450disagree, as things go further into the toilet economically, security becomes even more important and you don't need to be James Bond to be tough/armed.

[@Guildofarcanelore]

@@levismirnoff5450 lots of women in Asia that already think you are high value and don’t have an inflated sense of their own worth.

[@Moe_Posting_Chad]

@@Guildofarcanelore That's fake. There is no escaping to a fantasy land of expats. You're trying to outrun your problems, but you simply do not understand how utterly futile such behavior is.

[@PlatiumBeats]

I agree with @levismirnoff5450 only works if you continue to work on self and improving in different life experience. Its delusional and weak for "men" to think you can sit on your ass and good women/high value women will be running to you, sure you might get some women but will they be the one's you were waiting for i doubt. Hight value men are not just going to disappear. People do not attract that which they Want, but that which they Are.

[@Ancientlaws]

Very good analogy, well done sir. To expand a bit on your thought process, at a certain age most women become acutely aware that the house is burning down. At that point more often than not, their burning house has attracted multiple opportunistic ‘fire fighters’ that are making offers. Some women may choose to play the game and negotiate to try to get the best deal. However, the house is still burning down, so it really is a race against time. I have sisters, so this reality makes me sad. Our culture compounds this problem for women by encouraging them to pursue a career, while also promising them that the man of their dreams is going to be waiting for them on the other side. Little do they know the person on the other side is going to be an opportunistic “fire fighter / business man” trying to get a good deal

[@TroyDeFrates-jh8fc]

At 12:12 he nails the punch line lesson: lf you are serious with yourself...yep, self truth, no words will change her.

[@samuelmirando7050]

Yet another great video Orion, thank you. It’s highlighted an uncomfortable truth for me though, as a man in one of these relationships, the analogy of Crassus makes me realise that, as you put it, my “business practices are not exactly scrupulous.” It does feel a bit exploitative, and I’d much prefer it if there wasn’t this stand off.

[@ZappyOh]

"None of it is my fault" -- Woman

[@summersday7894]

Oh wow cuz that's EXACTLY what Men are saying!!!

[@ZappyOh]

@@summersday7894 Well, ultimately all of it is men's fault, as we allowed women to vote, work and have bodily autonomy. So, in some sense you are right. Men is 100% to blame, and women just got drunk on free power.

[@leyenda6149]

Iss all Jermaine fault!

[@omerkaya8243]

​@@summersday7894 Because it's the fault of the men who women admire the most, 80% of men are invisible to women.

[@marriagecausesdivorce7540]

Accountability and apologizing is their kryptonite.

[@ka9202]

But, women aren't just holding on to their pride they are holding on to their jobs ( as more women are entering the workforce), their money ( or the illusion of it), girls trips, their freedom and because there are more and more singles in their late 20s, 30s and 40s they can take refuge in the fact that while they are single they're not on their own island ,so to speak, they have other women who have chosen to go it alone, as well. So my question is how does this all end, considering shifting perception that women are the ones working and young men are all living in their "Mother's basements?"

[@MichaelLynMusic]

Sir...your Greatest Video Ever!...{in my humble opinion}...I'm dating woman that are in their 60s...{as I am} and still seem to gather some kind of "Roman Aire"

[@ijeomaokonkwo3832]

Amazing!!! Just absolutely genius and brilliantly delivered 🔥

[@jpaulgetty8998]

" Let go of the past to save your future

[@AcaraDain]

When 20-29 year old women of today hit 40-80, it’s going to be a glorious time for memes and videos. 😂

[@yuriy5376]

Why these women specifically?

[@georgedang449]

​@@yuriy5376previous generations of women got married and had children, at which their houses stopped burning. This generation kept burning until there's nothing left.

[@AcaraDain]

@@yuriy5376Because they’re heavily in the social media-dependent and highly feminist segment of society. The ones most likely to get a huge shock that they were lied to about being desirable their whole lives.

[@yuriy5376]

@@AcaraDain the social media part might be interesting to observe but a lot of today's 60-80-year olds were just as feminist in their 20s and 30s.

[@merdog3190]

​@@yuriy5376not even close..my mother is one of those feminists but she had 3 children and tries to encourage her granddaughters to be independent, travel, and have a career. Men and women can look back and second guess how great their lives could have been to some extent but women have elevated it to an art form. They all have magical thinking.

[@realharmoni]

This was actually really good insight. I love how you broke it down with the fable

[@dimitriskep4488]

There are MANY people who are addicted to the Mexican stand off. Like counting winning strikes. Men and women. And after the stand off ends , they are moving to the next one. This is some serious content for a video. Thank you for this video.

[@johnroberts3824]

Telling women to "settle" is against their rule book. And if they do settle, expect higher divorce rates. However that strategy is not a total loss for the women, because they get to walk away with half your stuff.

[@georgedang449]

They act like time is on their side instead of on men's. Why is that?

[@marriagecausesdivorce7540]

I lost 70% in my UK divorce. Losing 70% is also common in USA divorces. For example, if there is a $100k marital pot, it would get split 50-50 in the States, but the judge could get the husband to pay her 10k for lump sum alimony and 10k for ex-wife's legal fees, so the split would be $70k to her and $30k to him. I'm not sure why people keeping saying men only lose 50%???

[@marse7092]

@@georgedang449because they are biologically wired to only love and appreciate pets and the top 10% men. Better to be alone than stuck with a loser.

[@Lex_Lugar]

You’re right and as good as this video is, it just speaks to bitter male fantasy. Women are not going to change their biology because of a youtube video LOL

[@johnroberts3824]

@@marriagecausesdivorce7540 They lose 50% of all assets, and then there's alimony on top of that. The 50% number comes from the asset split, not including alimony. For me, I lost 50% of everything, plus another $70K lump sum alimony payment. Not all divorces have alimony. If there are no kids and wife has a decent career, she may not qualify for alimony.

[@josephoduor2358]

These series make me realise women are at a really bad disadvantage when it comes to dating, time. Something that can't be earned back or recovered from.

[@TheAustrianPainter87]

They'll always be on the loosing end of the sex games

[@october3rd213]

@@TheAustrianPainter87 that's why its better to not participate, afterall, a married woman will still turn old.

[@rahfx5485]

Not true at all. They are only at a disadvantage when they choose to be. The problem women have is they work against themselves, both at an individual and collective level in dating. If women would not give up casual sex at a collective level, and waiting for marriage was the norm, the only disadvantage they face when they are young and at smv peak would be gone.

[@stean90]

No, both men and women are bound to time. The thing is, while men have to use their time to build up the house, women get it owned from the start and most let it rot in the modern western world, instead of hireing a man that helps them keep it in shape.

[@adamasher7301]

They dont have any disadvantage unless they decide they want to be disadvantaged. They are wanted without having to do anything, all they have to say is "yes" to one guy before hitting the wall...

[@KCAngusStrong]

A small minority of women actually do reach their peak aesthetic beauty later in life (rare, but it happens--bone structure and facial fat has a lot to do with it). Either way, it doesn't particularly matter that most women begin to slowly decline around ~35. When it comes to a life partner (who you ideally value for more than just her attractiveness), beauty has diminishing returns after a certain point. Dr Taraban acknowledges this himself. It's like those studies that prove happiness plateaus after you've reached a certain income bracket (Killingsworth et al., 2022). All other things being equal, the type of a man who disqualifies an "already beautiful woman" in favor of pursuing an "absurdly beautiful woman", likely isn't suited for marriage. Same goes for women who demand a billionaire. Of course, fertility is a big deal, but number of eggs isn't the only factor; girls lose most of their eggs by the time they reach puberty. Other studies show that mortality rates for both infants and mothers are lowest when mothers are between 29 and 39 years of age (BMJ, 2015; and other studies). Increasing paternal age is associated with delayed conception as well; younger women (under 25) who are inseminated by sperm from men over 30 are actually 30% less likely to ever conceive (Human Reproduction, Volume 15, Issue 8, August 2000). When inseminated by sperm from men under 25, most women will conceive within a couple of months; when inseminated by sperm from men over 35, only a quarter of women will conceive within a year. The truth, is that the concept of the wall is a revenge fantasy. I enjoy Dr Taraban's insights, but his interests align with supporting men and men's mental health; most of his viewers are RedPill/Manosphere types who are disgruntled, bitter, angry, entitled--ironically, they're the perfect counterpart to the angry woke feminists they hate so much. Taraban's cause is noble, but his fanbase really cheapens his brand. I appreciate the incorporation of research into his content, but I dislike his willingness to allow his fans to draw their own misguided conclusions. Perfect example: his video about online dating, where men allegedly peak at 50 and women peak at eighteen. All it really means is that a handsome middle-aged man will have a large number of middle-aged women to choose from; young women are still ignoring them, unless it's a sugarbaby website. The researchers themselves stated that, when those middle-aged men contacted "highly desirable" women, they rarely (if ever) received a reply.

[@tylerjones6367]

You make some good points here, but I think that some of it is a little over the top. No matter where you go to engage with this topic on the internet, you’ll find frustrated and bitter people - they’re there investing the time and attention because there’s a related pain point in their lives somewhere. But there’s also a portion of people that are genuinely trying to better themselves and are not just looking for techniques, but principles and wisdom to build a better map to navigate the territory. With respect to the specific examples, there’s some truth there, but it’s not enough to refute the associated claims. Data is misleading and only tells you what the general pattern is, not the overarching truth. For example, the sperm over 35 issue - this comes from data that samples an average set of men in that age range. The fact is, many men don’t take care of their bodies and they naturally become less potent reproductively but that time. But By definition, the “high value” men Dr Taraban is referring to that are peaking at this time are not like those men. I’m an example of this - I’m 36 and my testosterone and sperm count is through the roof. Same issue with the example that the younger women didn’t respond to the older men that reached out. The data doesn’t equal the truth. Just because they weren’t responded to as much doesn’t mean that they aren’t of substantially higher quality - it just means that the young girls on the app didn’t respond to them. That’s it. This is most likely due to the state of mind young women are in when using the apps - they tend to chase young chads that know how to market their sexuality more effectively and overtly than the mature, successful men that might be looking for more than their next dopamine fix. It also doesn’t account for what happens when these women encounter these men in real life, which is the true test. If a woman doesn’t want to be used and discarded, which sadly isn’t a given anymore, then generally she will respond better to an older man that’s the “total package” vs a younger man that’s still establishing himself. All that being said, the women that are true wife material ARE the ones that will choose a young man in their age bracket based on character and support him as he grows into the man that has it all. Like Dr Taraban says, “only founders get equity.”

[@JustinCarr-r2f]

Orion you gotta break down sunk cost for people in depth it's a real life problem many men struggle with and you are able to explain things in a very understandable way

[@monicamccready3921]

What you say here is very true in the realm of stock trading. Nobody wants a lower price than what they think their shares are worth, and many lose out by not selling to cut a loss. But when you try to apply this principal to human relations as complex as human courtship, there are just too many factors other than sexual attractiveness to make the analogy valid.

[@HD46409]

The standoff will not resolve itself. Supply and demand doesn't fix it. In China there is both a massive surplus of men and a large contingent of "leftover women". China is also culturally more conservative so culture isn't likely to fix the issue. Also, there is going to be a huge psychological hangover from all this. There's a concept called inequity aversion that's going to make both men and women unlikely to want to transact in the sexual and relationship marketplace. Both men and women have both realized that relationships suck for them. What they don't understand is that relationships suck for both sides of the transaction.

[@marriagecausesdivorce7540]

Facts. A lot of children from the 1990s have seen their parents get divorced and the fallout from all of that. Why would these children (who are now adults) want to take the risk. The juice is not worth the squeeze.

[@a-t5380]

Ever so often I read a comment and I’m just so impressed with the writing and thought process of the person who posted it. This is one of those comments. I’d love for you to go into deeper detail. I feel the same exact way without the skill and ability to formulate it into words

[@Lex_Lugar]

Great comment. Every relationship is different though and I feel the generalizations happening on youtube are more poisoning younger (under 32) men who are already bitter and women are largely unaffected.

[@nelsonzambrano5788]

The difference is that in China, there's alot of social pressure for people to use common sense..The "left over women" are the ones that got bamboozled by the Western idea of "success" - They've got families, that were telling them all along "You're barking up the wrong tree" - The massive surplus of Men, they can always do things to increase their value (again that social pressure), but women quickly lose value, at least from the desirability aspect - While those Men that focus on improving their value will increase. -

[@andrasbiro3007]

China is a completely different can of worms in every way. No relevance to western issues. And no, relationship doesn't suck for both. That's just another propaganda from modern snake oil sales man. But with this attitude you are guaranteed to fail.

[@tucobenedicto1780]

Or there's another option, where women do sell, but are not happy about "settling for less," and proceed to treat the buyer like trash the rest of his life.

[@marriagecausesdivorce7540]

Wrong. She will divorce him after 10 years and take the money, house and kids.

[@derwoodhamburger]

Pre-nup

[@Straga_Severa_]

@@derwoodhamburger Overturned regularely.

[@SilentCosmicNight]

Stay strong! And do not settle men! Modern women ain't worth it!

[@marriagecausesdivorce7540]

Hold the line gents. Simping will back fire long term. You will end up losing your money, house and kids 10 years later in divorce.

[@АлексейПлакхин]

If other wealthier men is growing your kids isn't it better start for them?

[@ranglumoje5649]

You are not worth it ;)

[@GhostSimonRiley-fg7il]

@@ranglumoje5649 you too

[@jameswilson1522]

Incredible Wisdom ! Thanks Brother ! ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ !

[@user-uc7qb1su4e]

This video is the most legendary video you’ve ever made.

[@blucantrell2]

In the analogy the homeowners should not sell to the extortist at all.

[@ScottOdekirk]

Really? 🫤 I hate extortionists but, REALLY? Don't be reflexive & really THINK about IT.......& then what, BUTTERCUP? [all up in your self righteous indignation with kids to feed & Winter coming on] 🙁

[@Riskrewardgod]

Really enjoy your storytelling and your gift of making the complex simple. Your content is unmatched, thanks for putting words to the current dilemma of modern dating.

[@HeyChicks]

I'm widowed from an excellent human being. We both served in the military and most of our adult life until his passing had been in service. My husband and I both went to college and did very well for ourselves and our children. I'm still raising our kids. I've have lived in 10 states and 2 foreign countries. American men tend to be the most narcissistic. I dated on the insistence of his bf. It was the worst mistake I have ever made. I know the quality of men do NOT exist in my age. Divorced men are divorced for a reason. The amount of entitled behavior and lack of EQ is VERY prevalent in dating in all ages. Men still feel entitled to holding onto old patronizing behavior. It's so bad out here, I've had to relearn cluster b personality types that I learned from my psyc degree!! The reality is I never needed my husband, we had a partnership because our military backgrounds enabled that. No one needs anyone to make it in life... you need community. Women are tired of raising other people's kids(men) because they settle. I rather stay widowed and alone🥰

[@AfriqueNY]

I get your point. I think the men most women find attractive have harems and rotations and therefore don't need women either. Hence standoff. This is for those who do want a healthy relationship.

[@teefrankenstein4340]

Funny, I think the total opposite of you. Most women act narcissistic, don’t seem to really understand men or care for their well-being, and most that are divorced are divorced for a reason and men are tired of taking care of their children from other men. I guess the standoff will continue, our birthrates will continue to fall, we will take in more immigrants to make up the difference, and we will all be worse off in the long-run.

[@IY89118]

I love your sense of humor.

[@jthegreat3627]

I watch these videos because I enjoy your intelligent analysis and because I know how this will end up for most women. From what I’ve seen you’ve seemed to come to the same conclusion. That fact alone is why I harbor no resentment towards western women. You give great examples when explaining things, if you have kids I’m sure your children love your stories. Great channel, quickly becoming addicted to your breakdowns 😅😂

[@zoso9391]

8:14"a lot of interesting and important attributes go unnoticed when unpaired with physycal attractiveness" I think this also applied to me as a man. Most of my best features wnet unnoticed because I can't get a foot in the door (speking in past tense because I'm not even trying anymore) When searching for a serious relationship, you might be right... but only to a certain extend. Physical appearance has become way to important for both sexes.

[@autarko]

That's what I was thinking. Imo, it's women who are more obsessed about men's looks than the other way around.

[@mrquick6775]

@@autarko You know what, I honestly think it has always been this way to some degree at least. Women are far more superficial than men are

[@toriandjojo2018]

@@autarkoyep! Take it from a woman with her own career and own money-we want someone who legit turns us on… it takes sex appeal for that. Men want the same. And… I’m willing to say most men aren’t maintaining themselves just to end up like Johnny Depp, used and abused in horrible ways.

[@musicalfringe]

It's become too important because basic self-care has become so rare. I don't demand a supermodel, just someone reasonable-looking who's capable of regulating their body weight.

[@mrquick6775]

@@autarko Facts!

[@aomccaskill81]

If men only seem to want sex without commitment, is it because they've either had it before or they've seen others get sex without commitment and they want the same? Does sex without commitment incentivize dysfunctional relationships because sex can be seen as a reward and it is rewarding poor behavior?

[@tigerbear3038]

To a man, what comes with commitment is often getting his wallet milked dry. Women always talk about needing to feel safe but men need to feel safe. But the safety that men and women seek are different. Women may need to feel physically and emotionally safe while a man often seek financial safety. If a woman wants commitment from a man, one thing she can do is to make him feel she’s not just after his resources. Even if a woman is a gold digger, the smartest thing she can do is make herself appear like she’s not after his money and that includes not allowing him to pay for everything and being spoiled by him. If a woman is capable of being patient and play the long game, she can win over any woman that shows up immediately demanding a man lavish her and pay for all her stuff

[@tigre9271]

What's the BOTTOM LINE? Generally speaking, neither gender wants to settle. There is your stand-still. So each person needs to understand who THEY are, what they want, and most importantly, what they DON'T want and act accordingly to achieve their goals. That is the bottom line. It's NOT telling women or trying to scare women into changing for men. So either work on yourself and keep moving or remain rigid and hope for the best with the acceptance that you may end up alone. Trying to change the mindset of 50% of the population, whether you're a man or a woman, is futile and self defeating. Why do you think there are so many angry single people? You decide and control and uphold your OWN boundaries. You can't control others to not cross them. You basically gave women the "If you don't fall in line, you'll end up alone with cats" line. That doesn't work. That's not a threat. Women love cats and PEACE. Alone with cats is exponentially more favorable and peaceful than married to the wrong man.

[@tanyaflanders2196]

@@tigre9271 thank you for saying this.

[@shankar3651]

It's no threat when it's simply stating what's true. This situation won't last forever, and is merely a heads-up for the rare few who set aside their pride and listen. It is a fact that is proven across countless generations that men age like fine wine while women age like milk, and so the longer women hold on to their diminishing value, men will eventually reap the rewards by attracting younger women. In this regard, men will always win the race against time, and womens current bargaining power comes from men being too eager to buy cheap product for too much. Todays women are greedy partly due to the cultural environment letting them get away with it. They are hoping their value will grow indefinetly the longer they sit on it, while not realizing that there is a very real bubble about to burst and upend the market the longer any of them refuse to sell. Once that happens, and it will, womens value will crash and it will be a buyers market for the men. Men will eventually buy the luxury product for dirt cheap, while the old embittered feminist generation of women won't be able to sell even if they gave it away for free. You can even see the inverse of this currently happening with young men getting together with older women, and that is the canary in the mine for what is to come. So you see, it's not so much a threat as it is more of a suggestion to sell when the prices are still good. You had best hope that you time it right and don't miss your window of opportunity before then because once it's gone, it will be gone for a good long while before it returns to normal, and in the meanwhile you will be left holding nothing but ash. If you play the market, don't be surprised when it plays you back.

[@tigre9271]

@shankar3651 Something being true or not in your mind is irrelevant. Your alone with cats mentality and women age like old milk is meant as a deterrent or in your chicken-sh!t words, “A suggestion“ to deter women from doing what they want like remaining single, not having children and being self sufficient. If you think men will always win, then why are you so bothered what women do? Why not just ride into the sunset with your young woman? Why are you “suggesting “ that women sell their goods while the prices are good” if your prospects are so bright?. If you were smart, why would you suggest it that way, if you really wanted women to change? Women will not respond to your crude, misogynistic, demeaning language. You are actually pushing women further away, especially the younger women. Lol! You still don't get it. Women would RATHER be alone with cats and age like old milk than be with the wrong man. Women want their peace. Women are tired of getting burned. Then men say, “You should just choose better”. Well, women are taking ONE piece of advice men gave them. They are now CHOOSING better. And if they can't find it, they will choose themselves. The difference between men and women in this situation is. Men are trying to coerce, threaten, manipulate and “suggest” that women change,and settle for less. But women are NOT asking men to change. Women are just rejecting them and will take their chances on remaining single. You're desperate attempts to manipulate women is obvious. And so is your bitterness. Because all your “suggestions” are having the opposite effect on women. But, men can't help it, when they are afraid and desperate, they will attack the object of their desire even to their own detriment.

[@kahayse]

@@tigre9271 no, men like PEACE...and sex. But they will settle for just PEACE.

[@tigre9271]

@@kahayse No...what? What did you disagree with?

[@regimatic]

This is one of your top 5 shows.

[@cymonette]

Good point and interesting analogy, yet there’s another option, to sell the house while is still looking good so we don’t have to act out of desperation 🤔

[@slartibartfast2452]

This is a tactic which expanded, not the other. Only now it's international, common practice, and not the just individuals involved.

[@samuelnegussie3025]

What if women are building their homes to be fireproof? Many women are redefining the norm, embracing single motherhood, financial independence, and adopting more masculine lifestyles. This might not be true for all women, but I doubt most women feel their homes are “on fire” these days. Even if that were the case, you would end up with a resentful and contemptuous woman. I don’t think any of those people who sold their burning houses would have befriended Crassus.

[@incassable]

the house is your attractiveness on the dating market, not your complete individuality. Note that it is also true for men, but we age slower, and we can compensate with money/status/skills, and guess what, they tend to increase with time. so yeah, you can embrace single motherhood, but it means you have put yourself out of the dating market (unless you really enjoy situationships and casual sex, good for you then)

[@kin-of-orakio]

No such thing as a fireproof house in this analogy. They can compensate/cope with their loss through various distractions and delusions.

[@janem3575]

I find it disturbing that people these days think of relationships as a business transaction. No wonder there's an epidemic of loneliness. Do both genders think of friendships with the same market value orientation?

[@incassable]

@@janem3575 all because of women, go to court and see how marriages end up, there are transactions

[@KKR136]

I disagree with accepting a low offer. I did it because I turned 30. I was resentful and miserable everyday that I was married to him. I made more money, I was younger, I was better educated. It was embarrassing for both of us. I always had to downplay my achievements and always let him win. He knew this so would always emotionally bully me and gaslight me into thinking I'm less. Near the end of our marriage we wanted each other dead. For the men out there, imagine if you're a tall guy and your boss was a midget and he's insecure about it. Whenever you saw him you had to crouch to make him feel tall. How comfortable would that be for you? I learned it's way better to stay single. Keep your sanity and quality of life!

[@wendellmollycheck3669]

Brilliant Roman story about settling beyond most wmn

[@badbro2820]

PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE make an audio version of your book ASAP! I can assure you that the first copy is already SOLD! We love ya Dr. T!🙏🏽😃

[@IfSemper]

He did! It & the Paperback version are slated to be released July 10th. The Kindle version will also be auto-delivered on that date for those who pre-ordered it. He made a recent short post about it.

[@glennlgg6871]

If (wo)men are happy enough being single, then what's the problem. The true issue is being honest to yourself. What do you really want and what is the highest acceptable price? After that, live with your choices.

[@1Plebeian]

We've told a contemptuous, inaccurate story about the nature, history, and present day reality of the two sexes. It will take new generations that are being told a more accurate story to produce different outputs. You reap what you sow. There's no avoiding the fallout of the terrible story that was sold. There's just triage.

[@VaronPlateando]

those generations won't come to be.

[@garydrago]

Well put.

[@Noonien96-nx6yj]

Women's houses might be burning down, but even so a lot of men are only offering Legendary Creature cards from Magic The Gathering. It's a non starter.

[@cynicist8114]

Men are looking around at the quality of women they have access to and choose to play games instead. Men don't need a lot of money to survive. They only need it to start a family.

[@javierisaai]

I am from Mexico, this makes extremely good sense, in analogy and in reality. Women here are the same as most in the world. So are we men.

[@derekwalker1114]

That story makes me wonder if Krassus was staring the fires 🔥 🤔

[@themasculinismmovement]

The only reason they are judged only based on physical appearance is becuase thats the only aspect of themselves they cultivate. If they cultivated character they'd be judged on that, but they don't.

[@Amlux1984]

I think hoemath does a better job of explaining the dynamic and it won’t change as long as women earn the same or more than men. Also urbanization always produces less kids throughout history and we’re more urbanized than ever. If we define relationships between men and women as a shakedown (that’s what Crassus did) we are definitely doomed. Yes, Orion has rational points, but we don’t live rationally (which is okay) in every way, so if this is the dynamic presented to women no wonder they would rather get a career than a man who is seeking to do as little as possible for you.

[@asolaris6470]

Hold the Line! Nothing is in favor of men in Western countries. There are BETTER CHOICES overseas.

[@marriagecausesdivorce7540]

Simps will never hold the line. But ultimately they will end up losing their money, house and kids in divorce 10 years later. So ultimately simps lose long term.

[@marktapley7571]

Women are the same everywhere. Only difference is economic conditions and that is being watered down by more choices coming in.

[@2coffinfuneral486]

@@marktapley7571 I say that all the time put a dollar in their pockets and see

[@emmanuelbamidele6968]

Everything happening elsewhere is actually going global, women are fundamentally the same, just localized cultures keep them in check or not.

[@trachenismail4508]

I am not from the West. And don t be fooled, we have the same problems here or even worse.

[@dale116dot7]

1:30 No, we’re ok staying single until we take a nap underground, not waiting for a better deal, just resigned to the fact that there is no deal to be had.

[@veritas5078]

Wow, Taraban is good. Really good.

[@testtest-fr3zw]

I think the anecdote might work out in different ways. In the story, it looks like Crassus has a monopoly on extinguishing fires. This means he dictates the price. This is not the case now. In the current, dating marketplace, by analogy, some men would gladly put out the fire and rebuild the whole building, for the idea/illusion that maybe one day, the property will be theirs. The owners are aware of that. The owners could also make a proposal for the potential rescuer, to share everything that is inside the house, in case the house is saved. The house is empty, though. By removing the monopoly aspect, by setting this story in a fuller context, we end up with a completely different ending, where in some cases, the owners can actually turn their disaster into profit. Finally, what we have today - the city council - seeing the increasing number of disgruntled former house owners, took the matter into their own hands and founded a city-sponsored fire brigade. The owners seem to be happy.

[@legiontepes3474]

The answer it's a passport. I'm trying Thailand first and Philippines later.

[@michaelh6551]

As someone who survived a disastrous marriage to a Filipino, my advice is this. Find someone with a proven work ethic, preferably from a middle class family. Lazy women from poor families looking to marry a foreigner will throw themselves at you, but you will be entering a world of trouble.

[@legiontepes3474]

@@michaelh6551 i don't believe they are all saints. Just less demanding. I'll take my time and vet like I've done in my country EU.

[@upstar21t]

That won't work longterm, since the men from those countries will then have no women, causing a massive backlash towards foreigners. A ticking time bomb.

[@kengaroo5170]

It's the same dynamics, but your money will buy more.

[@t-spark]

Orion, while this is a good overall principle, there are a lot of con men out there pretending to be serious. And younger women, looking to sell early, are more vulnerable. Have you already explained the link between making sure the offer is real (not just relying on romantic illusions), and accepting it? I ask this as a guy who has seen too many relatives fall to scumbags.

[@tomyoung8563]

LOL You can’t con an honest man

[@jimgoplayoutsideable]

are you actually proposing to disillusion women .... wait what? What universe you live in? Hahaha, it's always been the father, grandfather, brother, male cousin, etc. job to make sure she doesn't get conned by a scumbag

[@RupertMcGruber]

This.

[@t-spark]

​@@tomyoung8563 Not sure what you mean. You mean you think its not possible to con an honest woman, because you cant con an honest man?

[@Doberman_6773]

We used to have a way to mitigate this - fathers would meet their daughter's suitors. Society decided to scrap that system, so here we are.

[@Dawnrunner42]

Unfortunately waiting isn’t always a winning strategy, because “the market can remain irrational longer than you can remain solvent.”

[@PointWithin]

I’m taking the time to do much needed repairs and upgrades to my property. Even if I don’t get offers I’ll still appreciate the improvements.

[@base99498]

Under 50 in Florida… I observe every widower inundated with casseroles from lonely widows. Takeaway: outlive your buddies

[@nikeisagreekgoddess4135]

What for? Sloppy meat sandwiches? 😂

[@davidr9589]

Tuna casserole? How many fishermen have had a hook in her mouth?

[@base99498]

@@nikeisagreekgoddess4135 were you thinking of a more appetizing outcome? Embrace your fate 🤌🏼 don’t forget the young nurses everywhere looking to make ends meet 😉

[@shawnmcdaniel435]

What for? To take on a 60+ year old dependant? No thanks.

[@mmms1979]

With a house that's been burning for a while, adding layers of special paint, or injecting voluminous amounts of insulation, or remodeling the bathroom, etc. are maybe not the best strategies.

[@agentofthewild684]

My house burned to the ground before I had a choice and now I'm rebuilding it from the ground up, but women can't see the efforts in rebuilding. They only see something that isn't completed. Maybe it is just my age, but I don't care what they think anymore and I'm building it exactly how I want it. That way everything I have rebuilt benefits my children and me.

[@derwoodhamburger]

They only focus on what ISN'T there, not what's right in front of them. It's part of their solipsism

[@musicalfringe]

You expressed my attitude perfectly. I realised the other day that I'm just not interested in assessing myself by their standards any more.

[@groopmmex]

Fookin brilliant analogy chief!

[@ariannebarote5974]

my take away as a lady is I should not put myself in crisis. Keep my house safe from fire and assess offers (within appropriate time period) for my unburn house and choose the best offer. Without the crisis situation one may get a low offer but an honest and well intentioned offer unlike when ones in crises. After the sell I got the money from the offer and I get to continue to live in the house but with the new owner.

[@mnml]

My IQ dropped about 20 points after reading the stupidity that you wrote

[@4ntoniol]

Can you make a video explaining the difference between pride and ego?

[@JJ-wi2uw]

Pride is an expression of ego.

[@kikiposada]

Intense stuff Orion. Bitter medicine is most healing though.

[@pmaitrasm]

Men earn. Men conserve. Women like to spend. Men have money. Women, not much. Now GDP is an indicator of money supply and money velocity. How to increase the money supply and money velocity? You know the answer.

[@wtfuredead]

give it to women? (sorry if i'm not the smartest cookie)

[@edheldude]

Women control over half of the wealth in the US

[@awsambdaman]

Yeah something that never gets mentioned in male-female relationships is how much a man increases a woman’s wealth. Practically any relationship a woman gets into, the man earns more and thus increases the woman’s wealth. Women complain about all the chores in a relationship but I never hear anyone mention this: MEN MAKE WOMEN RICHER. Can’t replace a provider

[@awsambdaman]

armandaneshjoo No duh. The point was that women are richer in relationships than when single because men earn more and women choose men who earn more. Obviously a woman can work…

[@Jimmy-gl8cs]

@@armandaneshjoo Can make their own money but still expect Men to pay for dinner lol.

[@BosomofAbraham]

Great video. I loved the Crassus story. He was a crass scoundrel indeed. It's hard to drop your pride when confronted with such an unjust individual or reality. But life is and isn't fair. God is the one in control of our current circumstances. God giveth and He taketh away.

[@SD-mi2vc]

He was the richiest man in Rome. On par with cesasr and pompey.

[@Yuri-w6t]

true. i am glad i have listened this, have recently tried this approach and hey it works.^^

[@pmaitrasm]

A crass business model of Crassus, But he sure made a lot of cashus. 😂😂😂

[@mrquick6775]

Love it!👏

[@gerhardvanderpoll7378]

Be Crassus, have casus and pay by the hour as the hours go by,to always have freshes fishes on the menu...