The Truth About Why He Stopped Chasing You

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[@MissSarahGM]

I guess I currently fit into the 1st category, where the man pulls away because he is not ready to give me the commitment I want. I am obsessing and overanalyzing... and I am probably more into him than he is into me now. but he was the one who hinted at marriage first, and talked about living together very early on.. Only to backpedal when I was hooked and wanting for a relationship. So yes women we tend to do those things, but often we are triggered by manipulative or emotionally unavailable men who just look for the chase but never wanted a relationship. The thing is that it is true I need to focus on myself again, but I may totally give up on him and be resentful for his whole hot and cold pattern.

[@AdrienneEverheart]

Sarah M this is where you need 1:1 coaching most likely to go deeper into the why & how you’re attracting men who keep triggering you in the same ways. Love to you honey!

[@user-pv5ms2gr8h]

So true same thing happened to me he was the one who came in and talk about a real relationship and marriage and l fell for it

[@soundofroz6835]

He might have been sincere about hinting about marriage. But then you started gettin waay too pushy and it scared him off

[@elainelee4828]

Such men are so not attractive, the right neuropath is getting bored and uninterested once inconsistency is observed. The number 1 healthy masculine trait is consistency. What I observe my bodily sensation when observing inconsistent behavior is mild nausea.

[@margerose8975]

Fascinating, thank you both! ~ For what it's worth, here's a quote: "Wherever you are, be all there." ~ (You're both great communicators.)

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

Thank you! 💖

[@AdrienneEverheart]

That’s so sweet. Happy to help.

[@nessienoodul]

Wonderful video. My body has relaxed...I’ve been so in my head and obsessing. Totally started chasing him and being aggressive then clinging...inconsistent, old behaviours...avoiding my own feelings. I’m going to sit with these feelings and be in the moment. Thank you

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

You're welcome, I'm so glad this was helpful!

[@nadine1018]

When you almost forgot them and then all of the sudden a life sign comes through hahah. Thanks girls ❤️

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

You’re welcome, Nadine! 💕

[@Shasha8674]

The same happens for prayers....pray and release the prayer to God and don't doubt etc.

[@AdrienneEverheart]

Shasha8674 I often pray should I even be asking for this or that... God or the Universe will answer you. ❤️

[@danilaroche1156]

I pray both Helena and Adrienne come to the Lord. These women rock my world.

[@intuitiveself-love9513]

To be honest I don't care lol I take what's given. I have no sense of urgency on anything. Come and go whenever you like 😭😭 of course if I like you I will show you but everything else is upto you. If you disappear well no problem. I am not attached to anything or anyone and when feelings get strong I breath. I will never act out of urgency.

[@AdrienneEverheart]

intuitive self-love you are rare. Most of us cannot do this. 🤦🏻‍♀️

[@margaritakleinman5701]

Excellent advice as always, thanks to both of you. I hadn't thought about the fact that a man can be feeling what's going on with you on a subtle or energetic level, even when you're not physically together. I totally believe this to be true. We have subtle or "energy bodies" as well as physical ones! Anyway, thanks for another helpful video, keep 'em coming!!

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

You’re welcome, we definitely will! ❤️

[@TaschaGal]

Love your videos and advice, Helena! I’m interested in hearing more about this idea that he can “feel” you obsessing about him. Do you mean if you’re in each other’s vicinity or even on a more broader energetic level like when you’re not even around one another and not in contact? I think we have a deep connection and am trying sooo hard to not scare him away with my obsessing by focusing on other elements of my life, but my anxious attachment-style keeps going back to the obsession. Thank you for your insights!

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

You're welcome! Absolutely, men are very sensitive to the vibe we give off. This video should be helpful (I'd love to hear how this goes for you!): kzbin.info/www/bejne/p4WnpXmXmctkapI

[@bre6825]

Tascha Gal I've never read a comment that was more me before girl, I feel you. my boyfriend and I are in a long-distance relationship and I just obsess over him so much feel like I'm losing him all the time

[@MissSarahGM]

Those coincidences happen it is true, people reach out when we were moving on.. But I don't think men are psychic or anything! It is just a feeling they get when after a while they reach back and they can feel we are still very excited and reactive about them, which show we have been obsessing over them during the absence. With my long distance guy, after a week of silence because we had an argument - I wanted more connection and he said he couldn't promise a relationship, so I said it's time to say good bye - then I couldn't stick to it and texted some days later, he ignored me for some time. Then we talked and I couldn't refrain myself from showing my interest and love much more than he did, and he has withdrawn for a couple of days again since then... So I believe he has just felt my interest level was higher than his and might be scared... However this feels like abuse and power games. When we were in person, he had been so loving and acting like my boyfriend, and now I feel like he is no longer into me and is stringing me along...

[@AdrienneEverheart]

Not too long ago I ran into a man I dated a few times... just as I was chatting with him, my man began texting me just to say ‘I love you’ . Yes they can feel the LOVE GPS connection. Once you’re connected, imho you’re always connected.

[@jenwu2758]

Sarah M I’m with you. I had similar situation. My crush changed his attitude and lost interest so fast in just less than a week after our first date.but he was so loving, showing much affection, acting like we were couple when we were together. Its sooo devastating and my self-esteem was destroyed after his pulling away.

[@tinamessier1869]

What a great video. This is definitely what I did

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

Thank you! 💕

[@JJDay88]

Hi Helena, I've been binge watching your videos for a couple of days now regarding men who pull away or seem distant at times because these discussions really kinda hit home for me. I've had a situation with one guy for approximately 4 & 1/2 - 5 years now. We met through a mutual friend with whom I was actually interested and pursuing at the time, but who blatantly said and showed no interest towards me which in turn lead me to notice his friend. However, even with him, he has said over the years on multiple occasions that he didn't want to be in a relationship with me. But, his actions have always contradicted his words to the point where I feel like we've actually been IN a relationship this entire time, but have been terrified to bring it up because every time I have done so in the past, he's stuck to his words. He hasn't actually come out and said anything in a long time, and its almost like he's happy with me and comfortable with just going on the way we've been. I know he cares for me and there is love somewhere in there, but as I said, I worry that if I bring it up, it will spook him and he will see what I'm saying is true and realize he's in something. I hope this is making sense, or at least as much sense as it does to me... These videos speak to me so much, but the one thing that I don't ever hear being talked about is my situation. Dating advice always talks to the single and looking, or the dating, or in a long-term, committed relationship/marriage. But, what advice could you offer to someone in my situation? I can't be the ONLY woman in the world where a relationship-like feeling emerges almost magically with time. We've never really gone ON a date, but we went one time to get fries at a road stop fry truck, and we've gone shopping together and I've attended one of his family Christmases a few years ago. I've been brought into his family and they love and accept me as his girl (but rarely acknowledge it). We've also been physical and when we're being intimate he is affectionate and loving and that's where I feel the love the most. But, he'll do little things (more so lately than before) like buying something cause he thought I'd appreciate it, or tell me something he saw that he thought I'd find humourous or interesting. He's not a very communicative person and scares easily which is why I've let this go unspoken for as long as I have, he's a great, sweet, passionate guy. But he's never been in a relationship since he's been an adult and his dad was out of the picture for the majority of his life, his mom and step-dad separated in the last few years after being together for 13 years and his friends always seem to be experiencing troubles in their relationships so I think he's just scared right away from being in one. He once told me he didn't want to commit to me because "Look at all the people around me? How many of them are actually happy. I don't want to screw things up with you and lose you in my life." This was what he said waaaay in the beginning, pretty much after our first passionate encounter (which caught us BOTH by surprise). Back then I thought that would be it for us having anything, and yet we're still "together", both have had one "out of the relationship" hook up with another person, but worked through it and have had a more solid thing going... Until recently that is... He's starting to seem like he's a lot more distant lately. I know his work is getting busier with the season, so that eats a lot of his time and energy. He's been going fishing a lot with his friends when he isn't too exhausted and I get what's left... sometimes if there's anything left of him. I'm sorry for this being so wordy, but I wanted to give you a glimpse at my situation. My question at the end of this is: Is there a way to almost take it back to square one, and re-ignite the spark of interest in our situation and get us to be able to get to a point where the "where are we going?" question can either be verbally asked, or we find a silent way of figuring it out? How do you get a non-talker (especially with relationship/personal) to open up and get deep? ANY help would be a blessing! (I've been told by a lot of people around me that I should just drop him, but I love the guy and have been working it out with him for so long, I'd like to try and see if there is a future for us and get out of my head and into more of my feminine heart. Is there hope or should I abandon ship? :/

[@simmichopra8305]

Beautifully said mentally not off the guy ..so what to do in that case ..he is in my mind always as it's being years waiting for my guy

[@risanaomi4958]

Really enjoying these videos. Great info to add to the unfolding conversation about gender and polarity and relationships at the moment. I would really love if you integrated more anecdotes and examples into your videos and talk about either your experiences or experiences of other woman to help concrete the info a little more. Thanks :)

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

I’m glad you’re enjoying the videos! Thanks for the suggestion. 💕

[@AdrienneEverheart]

Thanks for the suggestions. ❤️❤️❤️

[@nanetteross8403]

Never had a man say I can never make you happy

[@nickbry7357]

Good advice ...I am sure taking this to action

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

Thank you!

[@theroomnumber5210]

This is a video I didn't want to see because who among us wants to hear that we complain :) I know lot of women feel guilty that they are demanding, complaining. I did once meet someone who was not in contact when we were not together. I would let it go and give space but if I brought up I needed more communication, I was accused of making him uncomfortable. This was a clear line in the sand. I needed communication, other person was not willing to communicate. I did not complain but I voiced my need. Maybe he feels like I was complaining and he couldn't make me happy but that is not my problem. Regardless, this would not have worked because we were on different pages of what makes us happy in a relationship. It was necessary to let this go. We should not mistake what makes us happy and asking for it to being annoyingly complaining. Please correct me if I am wrong.

[@AdrienneEverheart]

TheRoomNumber yes! If you have a boundary or yearning/desire/feeling, in your case for more communication, you make this clear before you get into a committed relationship. So when the man ask you to be his (puts an offer on table) this is where you want to let him know how often you like to date, be in touch etc. If he fails at this, you revisit the agreement and if needed let him know in a relationship you desire X or Y and it seems you’re not on the same page. At that point you can “just date” him and keep your options open for a relationship. This is a SUPER BREEZY overview!! 😂 Get ALL the tools and processes in the COMPLETE COLLECTION www.EverheartCoaching.com/Unzipped

[@sejalkothari6687]

Beautiful collaboration..both of you ❤️❤️

[@Melina.b88]

Thank you so much for this video, what an eye opener! You were discussing about focusing our attention on him only when we're physically with him (or texting, calling etc) but not if he's not present. Do we do this (along with tuning in to our feminine energy, our feelings and present moment) even if he's being distant? Often times it's a very natural reaction to sort of "pull back" or be distant in return if we don't feel like we're being given any attention, its wrong but it is very real. Do you have any suggestions on how to stop this kind of thinking and behavior when we're around him? Thank you so so much for sharing this with us!

[@amore6206]

I'm enjoying these videos and this collaboration. It's very informative and I love how you both deliver, getting right into it! Thank you. I paused the video to write this. At about 13:52 or so, you speak about the energy they can feel if you're thinking too much on them etc. That prompted this question: Where might watching videos like this fall on that scale of energy toward him? I imagine it could go both ways in that I'm watching for self improvement, therefore it's an intentional act of empowering and building myself- which can be attractive. On the other hand, it was the question or behavior I noticed in him that has led me and peaked my interest in such videos. Can my directed energy to "improve" for the sake of being a better catch or more attractive in my feminine energy etc., for a man I'm interested in, be possibly felt as this energy you speak of that he can feel that may further deter him? Thanks.

[@nathalie5238]

Amore good question! Yes, he is pulling back so I think a lot if not constantly about him. Even while sleeping 🙈

[@animalames78]

Great video...surely if you are diva complaining (can't remember how the lady put it) then the guy is not right for you anyway! 😊

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

Thanks Amelia! 💕

[@nathalie5238]

Please give us tools to pull our energy of him. Whatever I do, even while sleeping I can’t stop thinking of him 🙈 I start to notice it affects other area’s of my life. So don’t want to do it to reattach him but get back in my juicy life 🥰

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

This video might be helpful for your situation: kzbin.info/www/bejne/p4WnpXmXmctkapI

[@patriciabrown8660]

So how does a woman like this stop asking for more and more. How does she stop acting discontent in the relationship.???

[@susanhorton9492]

should we let the Man say he loves us 1st?

[@jacquelynallen488]

The man I’ve been dating had been telling me in the softest way, that it’s okay to be a B- - -ch. I was so confused and I just thought he was playing some funny game, right? So Thinking I was playing along, yes I did-i started being the opposite of me. Being mean sometimes. Then one day, We had a falling out and I heard him call me a bit- - under his breath. I didn’t know whether to be insulted or flattered. He didn’t speak to me for four weeks. When he did, I could tell I had really hurt his feelings. I realized then, that in the beginning he saw me as a high quality woman and saying it’s ok to be a B was his way of asking me to stay feminine and let him chase me. Now, We see each other sometimes but he’s not as into me and I miss him. What can I do. I’m so flattered and deflated at the same time. Any advice.

[@dnibcn93]

But what if he is trying give u the bare minimum?

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

He’s showing you very clearly what he’s capable of and willing to do. These videos might be helpful: kzbin.info/www/bejne/bXelcqZ-pLGGhaM, kzbin.info/www/bejne/oZXdl5mGdsR8d6s, kzbin.info/www/bejne/jJTNd6Sqlqydabs, kzbin.info/www/bejne/l3mneZyFf6Z_oMU, kzbin.info/www/bejne/nKvcm4CihKlmpcU, kzbin.info/www/bejne/nJqnaZKrppubhsU, kzbin.info/www/bejne/gH7JYZSBm9Z2eNU and kzbin.info/www/bejne/sGeqpJ6kbKqCfc0.

[@susanhorton9492]

doesn't a man feel insecure and threatened if the woman is more financially successful and have more $ than him?

[@simmichopra8305]

Mentally leaning forward great

[@CG-wr4no]

I guess I just dont know how to approach a situation where he is doing something that doesn't feel good and I want it to change and I dont want to be a doormat. You know where is that middle line of telling a guy you dont like it without him feeling like he's not good enough the way he is. And sometimes it does add up. He's clueless on a lot of things and so then it seems like I'm hard to please, but I see it as just having healthy standards.

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

It depends on what he’s doing that doesn’t feel good to you. If you want to give me more details about your situation (if you feel comfortable) I can see if I have a video on that topic.

[@shesfabulouz]

I'm not sure what to do. I know I'm not suppose to reach out however the last thing he said was that he didn't think I was interested. I don't know where he got it from because I always let him persue and never ignored his call or text.

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

Did you let him know you're interested when he said that, or ask him what he needs or would like from you?

[@shesfabulouz]

@@HelenaHartCoaching No, because he said look at you your starting to talk longer on the phone.( Even mentioned the time) He said at first you didn't seem interested.(I thought he was reassured at that point) I said "cherish the moment"( about me staying on the phone for a long time) but I only meant I don't talk much. I laughed and said just playing afterwards. But now I think he took it the wrong way. 🤦🏾‍♀️ It's been a month now but he's also known for playing lots of games and button pushers since day one.

[@monet2251]

Why is it as women we always have to adjust to men’s emotions? Why are they not looking to make sure we are good.. adjusting to us? Is it that they just don’t care as much as we do? And why not act the same? Love your content. Thanks

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

The right man for you is absolutely going to take your feelings and needs into account when he’s interacting with you and making decisions. He’s going to WANT to know how you’re feeling and do what he can to make you happy.

[@danilaroche1156]

A masculine man will care about your needs. You've been with the wrong men so learn why. My guess...your father was selfish & neglectful.

[@gracelepri-valitutti9684]

Can he come back or can it be corrected

[@beachlover9705]

What if you think he is seeing someone else ?

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

It's up to you what you want to do with that. I personally would never want to be with a man who was seeing someone else, but that's just me.