HOW TO MAKE MORE FRIENDS AND BOOST YOUR SOCIAL HEALTH | BACK-TO-BASICS SKILLS

[@Mr71paul71]

Number one tip, make sure your wife is your best friend!!! Everything after that is secondary. And another benefit of this is when you forget a anniversary or her birthday you don't get given such a hard time lol

[@richardcarellano]

You are a true gentleman, blessed with uncommon common sense. God bless you and the work you do.

[@whyilovethesesongs]

Loved the whole thing... actually good presentation,felt like it was 16 mins of real interaction

[@fungun7414]

Great video! Profound insights shared not only as an aspiring gentleman but also of the human condition.

[@johnsinclair2672]

Some very good pointers for the reserved and those feeling in need of friends. However, not everyone wants to be a social butterfly, and are perfectly happy with their own company. Sadly social media shows everyone having dynamic lifestyles, full of fun and friends. What people need to realise, is those who post most frequently to glamorise their life and being driven by ego. Research shows the prevalent posters have psychological issues of some form. Research also shows that those sitting at home watching the fake lifestyles of these egocentric people, are left feeling their lives are valueless and kill themselves. Social media has much to answer for. It must not be taken seriously. Happiness is found within, not by following those with big egos!

[@Twangstarr]

One of your best self help videos Ash. You’ve struck a nerve with me and I consider myself well adjusted and very sociable. But as we get older we actually put up these silly barriers or excuses to spending quality time with close ones. Everyone feels like they’re always so busy which makes you feel reluctant to ask or to organise events then it’s just a downward spiral for all. Please continue making these content as it is inspirational to chaps all ages and demographics in this modern era.

[@TheChapsGuide]

Happy to help!

[@Ashkarelessar]

One of the best self improvement and helpful video I have seen on KZbin and I have seen a lot. I’m recently divorced and have lost almost all my common friends I made over the last 15 years. I’m trying to make some new but as you know it’s tough. This video has been so helpful. God bless you Ash!

[@9er..]

I’ve been in a similar situation (10 year GF) my friend. I CAN imagine the pain you may feel. Loosing your group of friends over the course of a break up is just as painful as the break up itself. I hate giving advice because well, you never know if a person appreciates it or is going to listen. For me I found one of the most dangerous thing was getting addicted to the pain and depression( I did, I cried every day for four years, entered the substance abuse world and listened to every sad song on repeat). Also for me, I know it’s cliché but getting active and finding a running club or a workout/yoga class can help replace a few minutes of pain per day. One day in the future, your heart won’t be so heavy and your mind won’t be so occupied with the loss.

[@Nicktuck333]

For me Freemasonry is wonderful. You meeting lots of intersting people and the presenting aspects also build confidence.

[@9er..]

Got that right Hiram💪

[@louperry5990]

Thank you, Ash. This topic hits home with me at this stage of my life. I’m alone for the first time in well over 50 years, and your video today helped me come to grips with that fact. I will be putting together an action plan to address this situation.

[@skylongskylong1982]

Make a list of your hobbies, and interests, and see if their any clubs or organisations for those activities. Keep moving physically, and mentally, and this help you from getting into a rut. All the best

[@diogeneslantern18]

Consider Masonry! :)

[@canadafree2087]

When Ash talks, I am all ears. One thing is also to know yourself. I tend to give away too many things, so if you are a person like that, know it, and do not expect everyone to be like you and to give you things back. If I know you are into something, I'll likely notice an item you might be into and supply you with it. It is a bit of a flaw as I need to conserve my resources as I get older. My best friendship currently is 50/50, he asks for nothing, we always pay our own way when we meet, and we often take his truck but I always offer to pay half the gas. I have even tried to over pay since he is driving but he never takes advantage of that. With men, it is important that both parties see themselves as equals, even if they are vastly different.

[@TheChapsGuide]

Very wise advice sir.

[@TheReubstar]

Many thanks for this. I had loads of friends in my 20s and steadily lost them for various reasons throughout my 30s. Now, I have few if any real friends, just acquiantences.

[@AMH-bl1ne]

Nice shirt, jacket, and tie combo today. Well done Ash

[@velviaman3206]

Unfortunately most social gatherings in my country revolve round alcohol.

[@viclucyzia]

Thats why its called social drink fotr a reason. Alcohol loosens and relaxes. But to control oneself is difficult.

[@12-OneTwo]

Could you recommend some platforms through which one can volunteer others by chat?

[@the.dirty.pigeon]

Perfect timing on this video, Ash. Thanks!

[@viclucyzia]

Making friends is as difficult as public speaking. Another is the time. Some just don't have time for friendship as their life is preocupied with family, spouse, work, another function maybe, sleeping and eating. The lack of time is the biggest problem for me. Having acquaintances yes but friends no time.

[@canadafree2087]

Certainly, that's why we have less friends as adults than children/teens. I also do not call co-workers or common interests people my friends. You are only my friend if we do things outside of work, outside of that martial art school, etc.

[@e-remes7029]

Ash Again, I'm catching up. After years of moving with the job (Green, not Blue) I settled where my wife had ended up as a nurse. Neither of us have familial, historical or scholastic ties to the area, so friends are scarce. Our friends are spread around the country and social media is a great help in reactivating and maintaining contact and currency of experience. I have a job which brings me into contact with likeminded people and upon taken employment there we quickly gelled as friends. We have a shared love of cars and engineering in general. As a Reservist, that too is another group where I have friends with a common aim and shared experiences. Socially, locally though, nothing. We are older than our neighbours and have little in common. Another social strand (and one you have previously stated is not something you come out with on first meeting) I am a Steampunk. And My family and I have just returned from the largest and longest running festival in the World, in Lincoln. Within this I am widely known and have gained many friends in the last 11 years. I agree though making friends can be an uphill struggle as you get older, but I think I'll be OK. *Salutes

[@ronaldpoppe3774]

Ash. At 65 I have lost quite a few friends to death. It is very difficult to deal with. I have made quite a lot of new friends from my workplace that I am just retired from. Some are quite younger than myself but people I have a lot in common with. I plan on keeping these friendships for a long time. I am a Free Mason and have been for almost 40 years but have not attended Lodge because of my work. I do plan on going back now that I am retired and hopefully making some more new friends. Great advice. I really like your style choice today. Love the olive jacket with the mustard tie. Is the tie a grenadine? Cheers Ron

[@TheChapsGuide]

The tie is actually a cheap man-made option. I would love a grenadine tie, but the price is just too restrictive.

[@ronaldpoppe3774]

@@TheChapsGuide looks smashing just the same.

[@viclucyzia]

The older we get the more confronted we get with death. We see family members disappearing, Co workers, acquaintances and the few long time friends. Unavoidable. But staying lonely isnt good for the soul. If we cannot find friends we can try being friends or good acquaintances to others. Helping someone is a good feeling.

[@diogeneslantern18]

Fraternal Greetings from Johannesburg, South Africa. Lurgan 767 Irish Constitution.

[@ronaldpoppe3774]

@@diogeneslantern18 🌿

[@dimarcodrahgi5866]

Great one Ash

[@ashmoreresidentialtv4087]

Great advice Ash and its about practicing, being consistent and patience. By the way are there any further details on the 23rd September meet up in London?

[@TheChapsGuide]

Thank you. Yes, I will be passing on the details of the location, etc in a week or so. It is the evening of Wed 27th Sept (not 23rd).

[@silasmoser301]

Thanks Ash!

[@daleknut1]

Great advice Ash

[@themoderndandy713]

I wrote a long comment, but it deleted itself, so I'll make it shorter. It's best to balance asking questions and talking about yourself. Why? Because constant questions and follow-up questions turns a pleasant chat into interrogation hour. Instead, try to get a feel for your conversation partner. If they're babbling on about themselves, feel free to only ask occasional questions. If, however, their answers are brief and they're asking you questions, feel free to fill in the gaps with your thoughts. It's all about reading your partner. With that said, a truly engaging and enjoyable discourse will be one in which all parties have constant thoughts to add to the conversation. Etiquette tip of the day: Avoid asking what people do for work. First, they're at a social event; they probably don't want to talk shop. Second, it's an embarrassing question for the unemployed or those uncomfortable with their job. Third, it's the get-to-know-you question that's so ubiquitous, it's become a chore to answer. (In a similar vein, avoid asking teens and young adults about their schooling. No young person wants to explain where they went to high school or which degree they got yet again!) Instead, ask, "What do you do for fun?" Who doesn't want to talk about what they find fun? I've had plenty of long, engaging conversations based on that one question.

[@viclucyzia]

Great tip.. And it's true 99% of people don't like their job and just do it to have a living. Artists who can earn enough from their passion are the fortunate ones doing what they like and earn from it.

[@diogeneslantern18]

If you want to make a ton of real friends, learn how to public speak, learn managerial and leadership skills and simply share in fraternal bonds whilst contributing to charity and society around you then you should strongly consider Freemasonry. One of the best decisions of my adult life.

[@frankv7068]

I like being friendless, familyless and totally alone, I work a good job which ironically I work alone lol and I’m extremely happy and content. I do want children and a wife someday though and that is my only worry.

[@TheChapsGuide]

Thanks for sharing!!

[@12-OneTwo]

How would you proceed to find professional partners through LinkedIn or Twitter? It seems commenting under post of a list of selected people would be efficient.