Why We Planned Our Wedding This Way

[@raimeyewens7518]

I think some women want a wedding more than they want a marriage.

[@HigumaHoney]

a wedding is like a first birthday, it's the mark in life that's supposed to lead to happily ever after.

[@LoriManning]

27 dresses yo

[@Epiphany_nz]

Easy, hold wedding themed and bachelorette's parties. They're fun.

[@Bonsqueesquee]

I'm still replaying my spouse's mother's words "I loved my wedding, it was all about ME!" Well, she's divorced now.

[@Epiphany_nz]

@@Bonsqueesquee Totally agree for most cases, the bride just wanna be queen And forgets that the point of a wedding is all about the couple, celebrating as a couple.

[@CharlieIsOnTheMoon]

I attended a wedding once, that was in the backyard of the couples house. They had put up a tent, rented a slush ice machine (this was in the middle of july, and total summer weather), invited the priest to their home and had the ceremony there, and the rented a hotdog truck that served everyone hotdogs for the rest of the day. It was awesome.

[@ashleyslack5960]

Invited the priest and had the ceremony there? You cannot do that as a Catholic. Holy Matrimony is a Sacrament and is to be done in God's House the Church. I love everything else though about the backyard celebration.

[@CharlieIsOnTheMoon]

@@ashleyslack5960 well I guess not everyone has the same faith 🙃

[@MidwestArtMan]

Bro, hot dogs?! I went to a friend's wedding last month, and I had to google part of every dinner option because they were so fancy. The food was great, but I was like, "Man, I honestly just want hot dogs at my wedding. I know what they are and I like them."

[@casandra0]

@@ashleyslack5960 Every house should be Gods house

[@maryann7619]

@@ashleyslack5960 Came to point out the same thing, but remembered the celebrant could have been an Episcopal or Anglican priest. Not Roman Catholic.

[@amandago30]

We got married in a public park, on a Wednesday, with only about 15 people (parents, siblings, nieces and nephews). Then just went to a simple restaurant after. Cost about $1000 and I wouldn't change a thing. I couldn't imagine spending a ton of money. We just wanted to be married! Coming up on 9 years ❤

[@divnoorsikand9100]

This sounds so beautiful, praying for your lasting love.

[@dystanysam9896]

I actually love that, having a small wedding plus I'm an introverted person. I think that I will had done the same thing.

[@HigumaHoney]

honestly that's what my ex and i wanted for our first wedding, but parents and family got involved. hopefully my next wedding, whenever that will be, will much small and simple.

[@bananaab3]

If I could go back, I would have gone this route. The number of people who attended my wedding that I don't even talk to is crazy.

[@robertwolfgan]

Beautiful. I wish you happiness and strength for the hard times, hang on and always, trust each other and be honest.

[@Grace_of_Nature]

One of the best decisions my husband and I made was having some old ladies at our church plan our wedding. We sat down with them once, gave them an idea of what we wanted, told them to keep costs low. Then let them have fun so we didn't have to stress. We got to make sure we had the meaningful moments we wanted without having to worry about overwhelming details like decor. Getting married at our church was free, we just paid the people individually who provided services. About $250 total. The way they did food was a bunch of the ladies got together and cooked something in the church kitchen for us. The leftovers were used for the churches luncheon the next week, charging us only the cost of what was consumed. If you know midwestern church lady cooking, you know how yummy it was. We supplied them with a couple of bottles of wine to enjoy while cooking :) I bought my dress online second hand and it was gorgeous. Neither of us like dancing and didn't want our memories clouded by alcohol, which also cut down costs. I had a friend who's like a second mom take pictures and she wouldn't accept a penny for that and she even made a photo album and video for us. My mom baked cupcakes and even without a ton of frosting experience, you can make them look cute. All in all, we paid roughly 1k for our wedding in 2021. Oh yeah and we were only engaged for 3 months.

[@lelamaciolek1166]

I would love being one of those older women!

[@Grace_of_Nature]

@@lelamaciolek1166 They had a blast. All their kids were already married but they got the chance to have that fun experience again

[@TheSoulCrisis]

Now that's a beautiful story.... :D You guys were ready to rock so soon, but you guys were smart about it for sure and glad for ya!

[@beardaquatics9163]

Sounds like what we did at our wedding. One of my wife's subtle helped organize, some of her other family made a simple but good cake, it was in her grandparent's church, and her uncle did the service. Then family on both sides pitched in to pull it off. We were also only engaged for about 7-8 months, and the only reason it was that long is because we waited till after my wife finished her last semester in college. Then for honeymoon went to the Vegas area (got timeshare cheap) to explore the parks/ history of the area. (We didn't care about the strip or usual Vegas stuff)

[@bladebreaker-12]

That is so beautiful ❤

[@slyi]

The pandemic saved us. We were only allowed 10 guests. We spent $500-$700 and have no desire to redo our wedding now. It was brilliant. No stress no real planning and done! Been married for 4 years now.

[@iTzTimmmy]

we did the same. We took advantage of pandemic so we can get married with my wife and best decision ever! It saved us from all the stress of preparations and gathering all our families together since we lived from differnt parts of the country. Cost us about less than $200 for everything and wouldn't want to redo it especially with the economy now and we just had our 1st baby.

[@CheerfullyCynical829]

You must love China a lot then.....

[@sypeka2]

Everyone I know who had a quiet covid wedding (me included) loved it. The only sad part was my mom couldn’t make it

[@calebbenedict6575]

Same though we had most everybody we wanted at the ceremony, we just did a small family party at my in-laws afterword.

[@suzannemartin6817]

For power hungry governments to tell you you could only have ten people at your wedding is so wrong. Not saying you should have had more but that’s a sucky reason

[@CraigandMartinaKelleher]

100% Brett. We got married this year and managed to spend only half of what we budgeted(which wasn't too exorbitant). We did it completely our way, despite many voices telling us it was virtually impossible to have the kind of wedding we desired with such a small budget. Cut to a month after and so many guests are still raving and saying it was one of the best weddings they've ever attended. Weddings are a celebration and celebrations are supposed to be fun, not stressful. Love your channel, Brett. Keep shining.

[@tmazi2212]

As long as you pay attention to your guests comfort (including ways to keep little ones quiet and entertained at their family's table) they will remember and rave about it. Some of our relatives are still raving about our wedding over 7 years later despite fancier family weddings since.

[@gaiuszeno1331]

Two years to plan a wedding? It took less time to plan the D-day invasion of Normady. Your not liberating France ladies.

[@sjm9876]

😂☠️ Spot on

[@DJVARAO]

The marriage will not last 2 years...

[@gocubs1815]

I was going to jump in and say "well they were planning on a direct invasion since 1942 with operation Sledgehammer"... Oh wait, that was still only 2 years!!

[@greekre]

they dont know where normandy is

[@kaylarichardson74]

This is the best response I've seen😂😂

[@pamm3776]

We ran away to get married. My dad always said “why spend all that money for a party and get a $5 toaster?” I agree.

[@mlittle2020]

My literal thought process. I was trying to explain to my boyfriend that weddings cost a lot depending on what you do. I haven't told him what I wanted and he already assumed that I want an expensive wedding.😒

[@mindymae]

My husband and I got married during the 2008 recession. We said no to the wedding industry and had a courthouse wedding with our immediate family and closest friends. My side of the family wasn't happy and accused 18 year old me of being pregnant the entire time. 😂 We weren't having a shotgun wedding, we were just best friends and knew we wanted to be together forever. I have zero regrets. We just celebrated 16 years together last month. The wedding, itself, isn't the important part. It's the commitment to one another that matters.

[@lexiefdf123]

My husband and I got married in 2008 too!! Kept it simple, just 70 guests, my aunt made my dress, just baby's breath and grapes for decorations, rented a very pretty park/villa for 200 euros: it was beautiful!! Everyone at my wedding too thought I was crazy because I was 21 😂 Celebrating our 16th anniversary on Columbus Day, 3 kids and going strong!!

[@Smilealot62]

😭😭👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾💛💛

[@Smilealot62]

@@lexiefdf123👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[@kimp7160]

2008 bride here too. But the recession did not hit Canada so hard at the time. We ended up with the big, white wedding even though I didn't really care either way. My mom and dad (well, my mom) had a blast planning everything and I just went along. It WAS fun. I know we're putting those down now and it was popular putting them down then too. I didn't want one but having had it....yeah, I had a great time. My mom was so worried her brothers would trash her for "being cheap" and I knew that was not an unfounded fear so I let her do what she wanted to make things easier for her. I knew I wanted to get married in the church I grew up in. That part was important.

[@Imzadi]

🙋🏼‍♀️Eloped 2015. Happily ever after!

[@morganmc0127]

This spoke to me on such a personal level. We've been engaged for 9 months and I feel we've had very few moments we've been able to enjoy together stress free lately. We get married in 1 week and I'm so ready for it to be over!! Family members requiring us to comply and accommodate their opinions, thoughts and feelings on our dime and time will forever be my biggest regret.

[@snappy_gilmore]

I paid $89 to the county superior court to marry my husband, and that was all. We put our money into starting our life together. We want to have a reception once we hit 10 years when we renew our vows. No two weddings are alike and that's okay.

[@ChelseaMilton]

@@snappy_gilmore love your idea! My husband and I are planning something similar at 10 years. Only 4 years away now…probably should start thinking of saving for it lol

[@zdtvcomet]

Be careful. We were planning on the same thing, but covid lockdowns ruined it.

[@rebeccanakashima]

That was me too!

[@DisplacedUnderDog]

That seems to be a popular option. Less stress and very easy to do. At the 10 year anniversary, it's just a party at that point anyways. The wedding part is primarily for the couple, promising themselves to the other. And everything else is for everyone else.

[@snappy_gilmore]

@@DisplacedUnderDog yes for sure. I’m glad it was just me and my husband with a couple of friends to witness.

[@Verpergirl]

I had a big wedding in a small way. We used the Ancient Spanish Monetary in Miami (beautiful venue) giant cake and dancing in the middle of a Friday with 20 of our closest friends & family. I wore the gorgeous gown & he wore a tux. It felt luxurious to be having this slow moving afternoon while everyone else was at work. This coming February will be 30 years. 💍🩷

[@elegantmess885]

25 years married here… met hubs online in 1998, married 11 months later in my home parish with about 100 family/friends… a small finger-food and cake reception in the church hall, followed by a dress-down barbecue at my parents’ home, where we stayed till almost midnight opening all our gifts in front of guests. My cheeks were sore from smiling ear to ear for so long; it was so much fun! It’s all about the people who care about you who are celebrating your union, and the life you are planning together.

[@VvnazzyvV]

i love how happy and joyful Brett was when she told us about her wedding day. i’m sure it was nothing but magical. i think it’s true that the wedding industry is getting out of hand but i do believe that there are still brides & grooms out there who don’t gaf about others and just focus on their own happiness and their own people. be like Brett. be happy and joyful on your wedding day. it’s your wedding day for goodness sake

[@lovejuliaxoxo]

Very unrelated but as a teenage girl, I love Brett so much, she literally is the reason I learned more about how to think, and I’m so glad I started watching. I don’t have to agree with everything she says, and I think that’s awesome! Please keep up the amazing work!!

[@sterling557]

She tells a lot of truth. The mainstream Media has an AGENDA, and has no problem lying to you to manipulate you.

[@MayBlake_Channel]

May I ask how you found her videos? I didn't start getting reccomended content like this until after I reached adulthood and I'm very curious about how a teenager finds videos like this, and what draws a teenager to click on said videos. Sorry if that's a weird question, and it's ok if you don't remember, hahaha

[@lovejuliaxoxo]

@@MayBlake_Channel Oh, it’s not weird at all, there’s no reason to apologize!! I watch this other channel called Misha Petrov and Amala’s channel, and I really liked video essays about the rise of anti-intellectualism with the rise of modern feminism/liberalism! I just happened to see a video one day and thought it was interesting, and now I literally can’t stop watching them!!

[@drownzi]

the best part of our wedding day was the drive home to our new apartment and getting to lay down in bed next to each other and go to sleep! weddings are overrated. marriage is underrated.

[@imaginyas]

Yeeeeeeessssssss!!!!!!!!!

[@margaretqueenofscots9450]

Absolutely!!

[@melissabond3577]

Got married in my back yard. And made a taco bar for the food. Only close family used covid as an excuse to limit the invites. Lol 10 10 2020

[@willimnot]

Nice! I wanted 8.8.2020 but it was too close to graduation

[@ontheraggedy]

Married in a tiny chapel right before covid, reception at a bar/grill. I feel ya, tbh taco bar sounds amazing.

[@aaronburdon221]

@@ontheraggedy I'd make the taco meat. Both my chicken and beef taco meat is f-in delicious. Well seasoned and hearty.

[@Orangeyoshis]

I got married on the same day!!! 😁

[@sarahjoy1977]

I asked my church to prepare fancy finger food. They wanted to help, so I gave them something to do. I don't have stuck up family or friends, so it never occurred to me to worry what people thought. That was 23 years ago, but the weddings people were doing was more than we could afford even then, and I've never regretted it.

[@beakboop]

We were extremely blessed to have my parents pay for our wedding. We were married in our church for free, we held the reception in our community center that we decorated well, my cousin took the photos, and my dress was on clearance. The whole process was affordable for my parents, which was important to me, and it was perfect. The most important part were the moments with my husband and family that I will never forget.

[@meadowyn7034]

My husband and I decided that we would not put on a big show for everyone and eloped to Las Vegas. It was I love you, you love me lets just do this and get on with our lives together. We were married for 20 years until he passed.

[@unlockyoursoulmemory4199]

so sorry to hear about your loss

[@aliciab.4772]

So sorry about your loss🙏🏽 Sounds like you had such a beautiful wedding day and beautiful marriage ❤️

[@laurennegley6905]

I am so sorry for your loss.

[@thecamillarose9806]

A las Vegas wedding sounds awesome ❤

[@aundriab.9538]

One of my favorite weddings ever was a lot like yours in that family and friends gave what they could and helped my then-roomie put together an amazing wedding/reception that was so her and her husband. That was nearly 30 years ago, and getting to be a part of the inner workings of that wedding and how beautiful it turned out, are still some of my most treasured memories. They are still happily married and their kids are now grown. It's sad that we've lost so much of that now. It's too much about the perfect IG wedding, and too little about prep for a lifelong commitment. Appreciate your sharing your story, Brett.

[@melindawood4885]

Oh, I will say one thing. The good thing about weddings being stressful is that you get to see how the other handles stress along with the in-laws. This is good because stressful things will happen in life, not all the time, but it will and it's good to have a glimpse before getting married. Just remember though, no one is perfect.

[@rachelwrobel1303]

Brett is just spitting facts out here!!! About a month into planning my wedding, I realized not only was the cost of everything literally insane and unaffordable for me and my now husband, but also the focus was no longer on us and our life together, but about this big party. Therefore, I decided I wanted a small, intimate wedding. When I told my now husband this, he said he felt a wave of relief and we agreed this was what we really wanted. We had a beautiful and intimate ceremony at our church and a stunning reception with our closest friends and family (20 people) at a local restaurant. To this day, we have no regrets and we only spent a FRACTION of what we would have had we planned the big elaborate wedding. And the best part was that I got to spend the whole wedding planning process just excited to be married to the love of my life and not stressed and angry all the time from planning. ❤️

[@chuckannd6034]

I love reading this. I'm glad to see some people using common sense. I never wanted a big wedding myself, even as a youngster when other girls were looking at bridal magazines I knew that wasn't for me. It never made sense to me to spend so much money on a big party for everyone else. Whenever I went to big wedding receptions it never really seemed like the bride & groom were actually enjoying themselves. I wanted to enjoy my wedding day.

[@MamaA2020]

I got married in the front yard of my dads business😅 Costco cake and flowers, dress online ($80), catered from a local restaurant that ended up being about $12/plate, and we just got snacks for before. We also had friends be our bar tenders and everyone said it was the funnest wedding they ever went to. Not many weddings also have a mechanical bull and archery tag😂

[@violetnorwen8491]

Sounds like a blast 😅

[@sjm9876]

Last commenter took the words right out of my mouth

[@wrenithilduincats]

My cousins got married in her family's horse barn. My other cousins got married at their church. You don't have to go insane with the planning and location. Our fam runs a greenhouse, I'll just be getting my flowers from there.

[@madisonhoyer2741]

It always makes me smile when I tell people that my mother and my cousins/aunts/gramma/great aunts homemade (or thrifted) almost my whole wedding. All the (fake) flower arrangements, all the signage and table settings, the seating chart, everything! My dad even made a badass Photo backdrop out of thrifted records. That made me proud and I felt so loved 💖 and very cost effective 😀

[@dano1667]

We planned our wedding in 3 months. We got engaged on Tuesday and by Saturday we had 1. My dress .2 Our bridal party 3. Our ceremony venue 4. Our reception venue 5. Our officiant 6. Our rings. It doesn’t have to be long and drawn out

[@Boboala03]

I love watching and listening to you talk about ur wedding! It’s refreshing to see someone close to my age express what I’ve been thinking about on social media!

[@RaqMor13]

My wedding was 5k including my dress and food. We had 120 people. It wasn’t big and flashy. It’s doable

[@hello1943]

Same budget, 50 people, but we were engaged for 20 days 😂 most of that went to the venue

[@louisem.3829]

Our budget exactly, including honeymoon!

[@michaelatheharpist]

We did the same but fewer people because of covid. Honestly it would have been cheaper without covid because my church venue canceled and I had to find a new one that was more expensive. It ended up nice though!

[@BlueDauntless]

That’s about what we spent on mine too. All cash, no debt. I was married in 2006 and we lived in Albuquerque, NM at the time.

[@cyborgtrexcorp]

@SourPickles8 I would guess it was in a backyard or a park! My husband and I had the same budget the only way we could pull that off was with help from our friends and community. Our neighbors hosted the wedding in their backyard and our church let us borrow tables and chairs. Some churches-especially if you go to that church- have low rates. I have a friend who is Catholic and booking the church was around $700 though they had the reception somewhere else.

[@graceelizabeth2940]

I love this! Weddings are just the beginning of a wonderful life together. My husband and I got engaged at the end of June and got married in the middle of October. It was a pretty hectic time but two years later I’m still being told that people had so much fun. We had burgers and a Costco cake, I barely had time to eat so I did not care about the food! My only regret is not wearing my glasses or getting contacts, but my husband looks at me the same way he did at our wedding so that’s okay. Preparing for marriage and doing premarital counselling was much more important than any detail of the day

[@jordanhoekendorf4982]

Issue is people want to be THE bride and not THE wife

[@raimeyewens7518]

Exactly! They dream about their wedding day and not the following days.

[@HigumaHoney]

you have issues, man.

[@FornitSomeFornus]

Look at the sad Incel hijacking a story on the high cost of weddings to put down women he doesn’t know.

[@angie-qe6ww]

This is so true

[@Itslauraokay]

Men want a wife and a baby but they don’t want to be a husband and father !!!

[@Jessica-uu3nz]

I love that you’re talking about this. “People over product.” Beautiful!

[@ColleenLang-g6m]

I have the answer: delete your social media account. You will live without it I promise. You may also find yourself healthier and happier for it. Go out and visit a friend, go to church, take a real, phone free hike. And please, for your own sake, have a social media free wedding and marriage.

[@DaveG-kb2sr]

The real answer right there. Seeing as how most of the complaints about expectations are centered around social media

[@rbfoster]

This. I mean, I still like Facebook to stay connected to things happening locally, but I don’t follow everyone I went to school with anymore. And obviously KZbin but for videos like this.

[@CheerfullyCynical829]

Gotta have a phone on a hike in case of a serious emergency

[@Bonsqueesquee]

Just made me more pissed off and miserable. I'm still with Bae 13+ years and not married with 4 children while they're all 30 getting married and doing it "the right way" and not inviting me. So... gonna be a snob and not watch, not entertain their "special" moments and focus on making my own more meaningful.

[@navyachauhan1129]

100% agreed💯 I blame social media for all this. People are romanticizing unrealistic standards and if they are not met, they spend their time and even their wedding day being upset about it, it's ridiculous. social media is the reason for all this comparison of who did better and showoff.

[@jasminecaroline4759]

May 2020 bride here! All our wedding plans got thrown out the window because of COVID lockdowns and honestly... couldn't have been more grateful! Planning was getting really stressful and overwhelming. Ended up getting married in my in-laws backyard with only our Pastor and closest family members as witnesses. It was very special! :)

[@amandabilger2235]

I might be in the minority but here is what I think. That big fancy wedding is for the guests, not the "happy" couple. Elope, go to the Courthouse, or, here in Kentucky we can get married by a Magistrate, in Florida a Notary can perform weddings. Do one of those. Have a family member or friend take photos. Then once you are married have a get together for family and close friends. Heck, make it a cookout, do something fun that everyone will enjoy. Stop going into debt just getting married. Save the money for a down payment on a house or save it for the future.

[@hannahcampbell8196]

I got married in May. I am the oldest in my immediate family and am the first to get married. Wedding planning was so stressful!! I totally relate to you saying you'd stress and stress over how to save money or what you could do differently, etc. We got really lucky and my parents gave us a lot of money to pay for everything, and his parents covered flowers and our rehearsal dinner which was so nice!! Things add up so quickly and it got overwhelming fast.

[@snoeleppard]

Such a beautiful wedding story! I love that you had everyone in your life so involved! I planned my wedding in three months, and man, it was stressful. I didn’t really have time to shop around for a dress, so I got one that I felt like a princess in and called it good. 😅 I actually wish that my wedding had been a bit smaller! The day was so crazy and so packed with people and things to do that I kind of just got swept up in everything happening instead of just enjoying the day. But, my wedding was amazing! I love looking back at our pictures! 🥰

[@jelledejong9857]

As someone who got married in 2023, I cannot stress this enough- DO WHAT YOU WANT. I exhausted myself with the second guessing, doubting, and people pleasing. Our big day was beautiful and I look back on it fondly, but the amount of time I spent focusing on the details leading up to the wedding was insane.

[@silentknight7078]

Me and my future wife will be getting married in a Catholic Church. Beautiful and extremely affordable.

[@brigidwenner6847]

$100 to the church, probably another $100 to rent the parish hall... $200 for a venue.

[@silentknight7078]

@@brigidwenner6847 That's extremely affordable.

[@Singalingaring]

We had a beautiful wedding in the Catholic Church I grew up in this past spring. My parents were married there. I received all my sacraments there now including Holy Matrimony. My grandparents attended the same church and both of their funerals took place there. Very special.

[@dwaynstepp6472]

Tuesday church wedding for son. I held it together until even the priest got teary eyed.

[@dwaynstepp6472]

My husband gave just about everyone who touched my sons wedding a check or a check with thank you gifts i hand made. Our donations went to support the poor and help turn a motel into family housing with a playground. Beats paying a wedding venue hands down.

[@Tac1990]

My husband and I paid little to nothing being completely averse to the idea of a performance. Our venue was free located inside a remarkable national landmark in Colorado then we all went Dutch at a beautiful nearby restaurant. Everyone took photos and my maid-of-honor’s mother was a professional baker who gifted us a stunning cake. Almost seven years later, we still value the simplicity and significance of that day. ♥️

[@sailormoonworld]

I got married in my backyard greenhouse (which we built ourselves from locally sourced/thrown out supplies) with about 15 guests. I spent under $4,000 with many thrifted items and I live in CA. It was so much more intimate and beautiful this way.

[@Farm-chitect]

Brett always speaks exactly what I’m feeling. These opinions are so refreshing to listen to because sometimes I feel alone in how I feel

[@mav4516]

I’d rather have a small wedding that happens sooner in an old American church, but maybe that’s my anti-social guy nature lol

[@Youaretheactionsofgod]

I don't think marriage and antinsocial guy go together bud, but I might be a contrarian

[@johnnewton4659]

Not anti social you just don’t need to show off

[@ashleyslack5960]

YES - get married in the CHURCH.

[@lucyj_w]

Not me tearing up about the barn raising description 😭 as if I didn’t already love your videos, I love them even more now

[@ChelseaMilton]

My husband and I eloped! It was the best decision ever!

[@steph3098]

My husband and I eloped about 3 months before my baby brother got married. I said something to him about eloping vs wedding and his partner had told him that if he wanted to elope, he could do it with someone else cause she wouldn't be hidden away like that. At the end of their reception, I asked how they were doing and they both wished they had eloped 😂😂

[@HigumaHoney]

My cousin eloped with her hubby right after college and are still happy together with two handsome boys almost 2 decades later. her parents were strongly against her marrying interracially but have since reconciled after the grandkids were born.

[@ChelseaMilton]

@@steph3098 that’s honestly hilarious! Eloping is the WAY to go!

[@ChelseaMilton]

@@HigumaHoney so glad to hear that there was reconciliation between the family!

[@HigumaHoney]

@@ChelseaMilton yah, it's typically what happens. asian families can be really prejudiced against interracial relationships, but then reconcile once the grandchildren are born.

[@melanienygaard273]

I resonate with a lot of what you said Brett. We got married in 2005 and we made our budget about $1500. I think we spent a little bit more than that, but my home church let us have the wedding and reception there for free. A lady in my church made our cake for free. We paid photographer that we knew, and it wasn’t much. It was a beautiful and very intentional wedding. And 19 years later, we are still happily married and have four wonderful children.

[@KRinT04]

Wow, members of my church are so lucky! We tend to get married quickly after getting engaged, like, within 4 months. Why wait once you've committed? We get married in our temples, for free, with a maximum of 20-30 people in attendance. Then people typically have receptions in our church's gyms (decorated, to be sure, but still free as far as the location is concerned). Some people, like myself, rent a reception hall, but that's also much less than the price tags quoted here! We marry for the covenant we're making with our spouse and God, more than for the show. And thank Heaven we do, apparently! Side note: I heard once that the more expensive the wedding and reception, the less likely a couple is to stay together long-term. I'm unsure as to the veracity of that statement, but it's an interesting thing I've not been able to forget ever since hearing it.

[@ellerydawnpiano]

I’m also LDS, and coming up to an age to be married soon. And I am literally so excited that my future wedding won’t be so expensive since we have such beautiful temples. And it’s so easy to make the church gyms look stunning! You are so right about this!

[@lauravreeland7684]

Fellow church member! Hello friend! I have thought about the avoided costs I will have for my eventual wedding.

[@lisaroper421]

Memeber here! 👋 My Dad had a guy literally teach a lesson about how cost-effective it is to be married in the temple compared to the world. I have always loved the image 😂😂 Best part, my dad was on his mission!

[@adrianeragan2694]

Fellow Latter Day Saint and I feel the same way about the options we have for weddings. Our budget was $1500 for dresses, food, flowers, decorations, all of it 18 years ago. I’m Polynesian so most of the budget was to provide a feast for about 100 people. Most of the rest of the details were done on the cheap or from generous people who let us borrow things or gifted us stuff. I’m so grateful! We focused on the marriage covenant for that special day and then a fun, but low key party to celebrate with our family and friends. We planned it in 3 months too. It is possible! Simple is better. ❤️

[@adrianeragan2694]

@@lisaroper421that is awesome!

[@daviddreyer6104]

Hey Brett, Congratulations on you getting married!! I am a dj for (37 years) and I like what you said what you did with doing the Parents Dances before the The First Dance so you can go right in open dance floor. I think I'm gonna use that in my future weddings that I dj at.

[@supremacy2040]

My mother told me that weddings and building a home and picking out colors are the same, both are done for everyone else’s opinion but the person/s it’s actually for.

[@HigumaHoney]

weddings aren't about you, it's about your parents.

[@cherrybombb2306]

@@HigumaHoney huh? interesting. the ceremony where you celebrate the union of you and your spouse isn't about you, but rather about your parents, who may not be alive/active in your life. that's quite an interesting opinion

[@FebbieG]

​@@HigumaHoneyWeddings are about the couple, AND their parents, AND extended family, AND friends, AND the local community.

[@Natalie-pk7cy]

No one forces you to have a wedding though. Just have a wedding that you dream of and only invite the people who wish you well. And if you don’t want a wedding at all then just get married without it.:) But probably depends on what country you live in. I get if the culture is harsh and makes you do certain things. Anyways, good luck:)

[@miasgotthejoy]

Love that people are talking about this! My husband and I were married 10 years ago. We got engaged in the summer and were married less than 7 months later in the winter. We booked one of the simple halls in the area for only $500. It has tons of windows with a beautiful view of the city and river. Our total wedding cost, including my dress was around $6000. We never felt a need to compete or do anything other than be ourselves. So many family and friends blessed us by using their talents from making the bouquets, decorating the church, DJ’ing, to singing at our reception, and all the things in between from setting up to tearing down. We’ve gotten complemented for years about how beautiful our wedding was and how it’s one of the most memorable people have been to. We just let it be a relaxed celebration! And it was!

[@toffykat]

My future husband and I are having a traditional, Greek Orthodox wedding in Greece!!

[@faithful2thecall]

So true. A lot of weddings do feel like they're more about the show than the meaning behind the event. Good for you and Alex for having an event that you'll both cherish forever.

[@superc2235]

10:50 The way she says, “ObScEnelLY overpriced”. Is the the most dramatic way I have seen her say something. lol

[@jennatenorio166]

But she's so right! I got quoted 11k for catering for 50 guests!! 😂😂

[@DisplacedUnderDog]

Love how you kept it local, helping out the community you lived in and the people in your lives and they were all too happy to help you out, it seems. ❤😊😊❤

[@Trustm32090]

Got married in May during COVID and also used it as an excuse to invite fewer people (I see others have done that too in the comments). We paid for the entire day ourselves, had both the ceremony and the reception at an Airbnb, and like Brett, most of what we had done was by people we know and love. All in all, it was around $5k and I wouldn’t change a thing still to this day. Why start your marriage in stressful debt, esp when the #1 reason for divorce is finances?

[@John-316URLOVED]

We had always joked about getting married on a Wednesday (I am a teacher and that is my "early day"). Anyway, we got married in the summer, at the courthouse, on a Wednesday- only parents allowed. Went to a nice dinner afterward and a week later had a BBQ for family and friends to celebrate. We have always done things our way and that just makes me love it more. Your wedding photos are so gorgeous and seeing the red bird, oh my goodness, how perfect! Blessings for you guys on this beautiful journey.

[@elimartinez___]

My husband and I got married in our first apartment. His parents, mine, and our siblings. Been happily married for 11 years. No regrets I honestly would’ve gotten eloped as well 😅

[@ammhber]

We eloped on February 29, 2020 (2 weeks before the pandemic) outside of a random church because it had a ton of trees, and it was beautiful. We are military, so no family around us. I genuinely never "dreamed" about my wedding. I didn't care much about the idea of one. I'm so glad we eloped. So intimate and the officiant made our ceremony so special for us. We barely paid anything, just the marriage license and officiant, lol.

[@willimnot]

My wife and I had a 100 guest wedding, planned in 9mo, for less than $25k in the middle of 2020. We had a great planning experience, fantastic time, and happy guests. It’s possible

[@jonathanb1949]

Im planning my wedding, and I don't think it will cost us more than $4k. 😅

[@hayleymariepauley]

Most people could never afford a wedding that expensive! (25k) I went into debt planning my wedding that was around 9k and regret it! If I could go back, I would forget the wedding and Elope. I would make it about only me and my husband and not about throwing our family and friends a party.

[@guy_from_space3388]

Me and my Fiancée are currently planning our wedding, with also around 100 guests, and we’re at around 25k. Thankfully we’re not in debt, but it is tiring and very stressful. Getting married May 30th next year, and we’re already feeling quite burnt out. That cost was the minimum of what we were looking for sadly. We’re both working jobs and doing school. It’s quite a handful

[@pint_pipe_cross]

That sounds exactly like my best friends wedding! There were no bridesmaids or groomsmen other than the MOH (me) and the best man. I threw a bridal shower for her, but she didn’t want an engagement or bachelorette party. Her parents made ALL the food (including the cake) for the wedding and rehearsal dinner, and we did all the floral arrangements and decorations. There were maybe 75 people at the wedding, and it was truly a perfect day.

[@pamelaward3996]

25k ? Um… not sure that’s possible for the average person today but ok

[@MichalGarner-h8r]

utilizing personal relationships and friends to help with food, setup, decor, etc. was such a huge benefit for us! We were amazed by how willing people were to step up and contribute to our day, and it really made the day so much more meaningful for us to know we had so many people who loved us enough to pull it off. Also, some advice: food would have been the major tipping point of our budget, but we settled on soup, salad, and bread for our guests! Bought some soup from Costco, made two different varieties at home, and rented some big tureens. Super cost-effective and aesthetic! There are ways around this crazy industry.

[@Atrus999]

Brett's wedding reminds me of that one scene from Father of the Bride where George imagines his daughter having a BBQ wedding and everyone gets so offended that he would even consider something like that. 😂

[@DeborahHMarks]

I was thinking of that movie the entire time she was talking.

[@TheTweetybird1122]

4:50 Brett, you are proving my belief that the more you spend on a wedding factor into a how successful your marriage will be.

[@rebekahwinkle3433]

17:19 my grandma made my cake and it was so special to me! I actually got to help her do it. It was such a fun process!!

[@adut18]

I love this. My wife and I got married in the backyard of one of her uncles. My wife comes from a creative family. It was such a blessing to have everyone use their creative talents to make our day special. It was also a blessing to not have to stress about it because I knew that everyone involved loved us and wanted to make our day special. Our wedding was small but the whole thing was perfect! Our biggest splurge was on the honeymoon.

[@edgarrodriguez2332]

A marriage is a metaphor for Christ Jesus relationship to the church.

[@uikmnhj4me]

It’s a reflection of that, yes. Not just a metaphor.

[@wanderingstar4516]

They need a divorce. The Catholic Church made that assumption. Jesus doesn’t need a church. Nature is his ‘church’

[@synthiamcbride7194]

Not really. When I had sex with my husband, I can assure you that I didn't imagine me as a "metaphor" for a church and him as a "metaphor" for Jesus.

[@ArcherMVMaster]

In your mind maybe, but Mariage has been a thing waayyyy before Christianity, and it many different cultures around the world.

[@TedEhioghae]

Also, women have to be natural and dress modestly, not only men.

[@elenacjhuang]

This video is posted RIGHT ON TIME! I just got engaged with my bf and because he's from the UK, I really wanted to have our wedding in a castle (found this one in a private island in NI and everything looks lovely). But my families are mostly in Asia and the flight tickets to fly them over is so expensive. It's almost impossible to make the castle wedding happen in one year given the fact that we also need to save for our car and house... Then I realized that the whole castle experience is only going to benefit the guests the most, and what really matters to me, to us, is having each other and our very close families and friends to be there. When I was having second doubt about giving up my wedding in a castle, I saw your video - which made me so relieved! Now I'm confident that we are going to have a wonderful wedding next autumn and still keep it in budget haha :)

[@Megumi.-.]

Ad starts at 11:11 , ends at 13:05

[@willimnot]

Commenting for engagement so this gets attention

[@dancostello4872]

Not all heroes wear capes 👏🏾

[@ArcherMVMaster]

Laughing in KZbin Vanced auto Skip 😏 😈

[@LoveCarol]

Brett is the queen of repeating too much in her ads 😩

[@vudujujuju]

​@@ArcherMVMaster saaameee

[@FarmgirlFriday]

I am single, but I lived through all my friends getting married 10-15 years ago and it was like, the ultimate one up Pinterest perfect competition. Mind you, these were couples and families that genuinely cared about the marriage, but there was so much pressure to do SO MANY things. All the cute decorations and hashtags and Photo Booths and on and on. A lot of it was driven by the mothers of the bride, perhaps because most of the brides were younger. At age 35, if I get married, the small elopement I’m paying for myself sounds lovely.

[@ChaiTea7]

Crazzzzzyyy that Brett makes a video about this as I’ve been engaged for barely over a month and have had a few breakdowns because of wedding planning and how crappy the industry is. As my fiancée would say, it feels like cancer. 🙃 I’m thrilled to be engaged, but the costs are absurd.

[@HigumaHoney]

maybe plan a destination wedding overseas where the venues and catering are much cheaper, and you can limit your guest list because people have to rsvp and pay for their own plane tickets and accommodation. i think only your real family and real friends would bother to attend.

[@ChaiTea7]

@@HigumaHoney Unfortunately our families and friends would not be able to handle the cost of that. We would rather have the people we love surround us than make it harder for them to come. Thank you though!

[@ambersolomon7942]

SAME! Even trying to find blogs on "micro" weddings or budget weddings is stressful!

[@laryleidys]

@@HigumaHoneyI have been looking into international wedding to save on the cost but sadly, it is the same if not more expensive than getting married here. At this point I am lost and I just want to elope

[@lucycarlisle9120]

​@@laryleidys Then elope & jist plan a reception/party at a local brewery or park! Provide cake & just have fun!!

[@Notsoprettyinpink]

I am very blessed to have gotten married during covid. It was just me and my husband at the church + the congregation and 3 friends that were in town. (the downside was that my family could not fly in). I made my dress, we cooked the food, some other people brought food, had our reception in the church's meal room and that is it. Ultimately the marriage is what matters, wedding is just one of the steps to it.

the way you described your wedding; would love to see video...normally im not a fan of weddings, but it sounded amazing.

[@rachaelholderman9677]

Brett and I align so much on wedding planning values! We had 100 attendees because I wanted all the people we were closest to there but we had people that we knew provide as many of the services as possible according to their specialties. It was so special and attendees told us it was the best party ever.

[@pill677]

Yeah i just got married in June and the whole thing was insane. The whole insustry is crazy.

[@danieltorres7519]

Congratulations on the marriage!!

[@felicityengel8812]

Congratulations! My husband and I also got married in June

[@pill677]

@@felicityengel8812 congrats to you as well!!!

[@FebbieG]

🎶 🎵 They say when you marry in June, you're a bride all your life, and the bridegroom who marries in June gets a sweetheart for a s wife. 🎵 🎶

[@eileen6646]

Same here! Our wedding was basically funded by our families but everything came out to like $20k for an average wedding in Los Angeles (we had a lot of friends and family we wanted there). And that was on the cheap side. It was insane!

[@chalieamullee13]

I loooove that you answered some questions about your wedding! You’re such a level headed person I always imagined your wedding to reflect that. I’m getting married next your and this was such a good reassurance that my small hometown wedding will be exactly what my fiancé and I want. And I can’t wait for him to be my husband!

[@sydneyislove]

My husband & I met at church last Fall. We were quick with serious & productive conversations & discussed life goals. We were engaged in june and married in august! An outdoor ceremony, ,a brunch reception, & a cabin honeymoon ♡ What God put His hand ppm never comes confusion. Send it!

[@kim-7457]

I recently got engaged and my fiancé and I have been discussing the same thing-an outdoor ceremony, a brunch reception, and a cabin honeymoon in the mountains.

[@brittanyverville3722]

I was soooo lucky! My brother owns a restaurant so his wedding gift was all the food for free My mother in law is a baker, so she made the cake also for free A good friend from my work was also a wedding photographer so we got that at a nice discount We had a friend working with air transat, so we had a great honeymoon for a good price ! Love all the people that helped it was an amazing wedding

[@tiffanysnyder]

Currently planning my wedding and def realizing all the unnecessary costs 😂 like just the paper alone, I’m only doing wedding invitations but the knot is trying to advertise 1) save the dates 2) wedding invites 3) RSVPs 4) wedding info cards 5) bridal shower invites 6) thank you cards Like what 😂 no, I’m doing invites and then the rest will be on our website or done in person. And let’s not forget the “budget venues” that cost $2500 BUT if you want the decor and everything else that makes the setting pretty to be included then it’s an extra $3800 🤣

[@raimeyewens7518]

I was just talking to my husband the other day about how cheap our wedding was (1995). We threw it together in 2 months and I sent out fill in the blank wedding invitations 😂😂 I think it cost under $10.

[@ambersolomon7942]

Right?! I'm advocating for PDF invitations that I'll make on Canva and emailing them out to people. "Click to RSVP" 😅

[@gaiuszeno1331]

Don't you and 99% of everyone you know have email addresses?

[@gaiuszeno1331]

​@@ambersolomon7942A PDF ? Why not just plain text readable in anything.

[@ambersolomon7942]

@@gaiuszeno1331 Exactly.

[@ItsJustGvbe]

I just got married, and I cannot tell you enough that planning a wedding was the most stressful time of my life. I loved spending time with my wife (now), but there were stressful discussions, and we almost had a postponement. We were able to pull it off, thanks to our family and friends. I will work my ass off to make sure that my wife and I spend the rest of our lives together because I love her, and I never want to plan another wedding again.

[@AboyfromFlorida]

simple weddings are the best

[@peaceofpaperbindery]

We got married in April of 2020, COVID wedding, ten people in attendance. It was beautiful, perfect, and everything it needed to be. We didn’t have a photographer, we didn’t have a huge reception, we didn’t have a honeymoon. I do wish more people could’ve been there with us, but it was the most beautiful wedding experience ever. We got married in the small town church we dreamed of and our priest said recently that it is his favorite wedding ever.

[@Dallasneedsmoreblegh]

My wedding is coming up. Well, not a wedding. It’s just my fiancé and I going to Colorado to officiate our own wedding and exchange vows in the mountains. No one other than us two and God.

[@BelleMort6]

We just celebrated our one year wedding anniversary (though we've been together almost 18 years.) We had one month to plan. *One month.* It was stressful, but I still had so much fun making everything with the intention that it was going to be so 'us'. All of our friends and family that came still say that ours was the most fun, cool, unique and full of love than any they'd ever been to. It cost maybe 2k, and most of that was to have it at a historic castle. You don't need a ton of time or money to do something great!

[@Ruateddybear2]

My husband and I did the same thing. We did a lot of things on our own and had our friends and family help. We splurged on a band. It was beautiful and a medium sized wedding but full of love and lots of fun. Not that expensive but we made it ours. And totally agree…STAY AWAY FROM TRADITIONAL WEDDING VENDORS. 😂 I swear the word wedding makes the price triple!!!

[@Jaxmusicgal23]

Same

[@hannahchavis3027]

My husband and I spent $25 each on the marriage license and that was it. Our college campus pastor married us with the school photographer offering to take pictures and two of our friends as witnesses. One of the friends brought a small cake and we all had a good time. No regrets! My mom later held a small drop-in reception for us which was also fantastic. Very small and so personal. People loved it and like Brett said, people were able to be involved and feel part of our day in ways we couldn't have achieved going traditional.

[@mrs.9315]

We got married on the lawn at church. 50 people in attendance. Made all the food, did all the flowers, set up/tear down. Biggest splurge was a photog for $1,200. Only $2,200 for the WHOLE wedding total.

[@gisellesanchez143]

My husband and I courted for 2 weeks, engaged for 3 months and our wedding was sooo special! My brother walked me down the aisle too! A majority of my guests were from out of state from my first church in Texas. Had to have an indoor weeding because it was hurricane season here in Florida. Everything was done by our church. About 200 people attended and we had a bar type food style. I was shocked walking into the venue because I trusted God throughout the entire process and it came out beautiful. Our wedding cost us about $10,000 but I really only picked out the colors. We were gifted it all back anyways plus the honeymoon in Aruba with the love of my life has been unforgettable. Our life is amazing. Praise God!

[@kenalbrecht5649]

Got married in a church at a cost about $6000 (including honeymoon) where the wedding dress and bridesmaids dresses were sewn and food - photography done by friends and family. Did the same for my 4:28 daughter as well for about the same cost. The higher the cost, greater chance for divorce.

[@HH-wq6se]

No joke! An expensive wedding and extended engagement show the couple's priorities are askew from the outset!

[@karladiaz2044]

My husband and I got married last year at the courthouse, two weeks after being engaged. It was great and I loved that we were able to do it on a specific and special day that meant a lot to both of us. But afterwards we decided to do a little ceremony and party to share with our friends and family, and the whole thing stressed me out so much we decided to just do a dinner with our close family and it was the best option for us.

[@kenny667]

YESSSSS 20 MINUTE BRETT COOPER VIDEO

[@tarastone4417]

I love this so much!! I'm so thankful we got married before ever having social media and how things are now days. So proud of yall!!

[@laseximexi]

5:57 Brett takes a sip ☕️

[@racheldodsworth7902]

We're getting married in November. We both knew our wedding venue immediately because it has so much meaning to us. We chose a campground on the lake where we often camp. It's cheap and means so much more than a random fancy building. We are going small as well and doing a lot of DIY. My mom is making my dress with fabric from her dress and my my grandmother's dress. Again, it's a savings of thousands of dollars and has SO much more meaning!

[@ontheraggedy]

Weddings and receptions are a waste of money. Think simple, focus on your new spouse instead of yourself. Weddings reveal how self centered brides and grooms can be.

[@HigumaHoney]

i wanted a small and simple wedding, but oftentimes weddings are more about your parents than yourself.

[@louderthanwordsInclusivity]

No, not necessarily. Wedding ceremony and "receptions" or celebrating is as old as marriage itself. It outdates legal marriage, and was the epitome of officiating marriage for the majority of the people until very very recent history. It is a way for everyone to celebrate an important life change, the uniting of two souls forever as one, the uniting of two families into one, in front of and with the families and loved ones and communities, incorporating the religious and spiritual beliefs as well. And after, the loved ones would celebrate together, and this differed depending on the region and part of the world and time period, but across all regions there was a celebration after, sometimes for WEEKS, to support and celebrate such an amazing and permanent change, the start of a new family and the binding of 2 forever. We as humans have Ceremonialized and celebrated important moments and changes since before it could even be documented in writing. Hell, we even celebrated good harvests every year! We celebrated children becoming adults, we celebrated people becoming parents, men becoming warriors, and so on. It's a part of human nature and a way that we express and share and revel in our important and life changing moments socially, sharing these moments with our loved ones via fun, happy memories and ceremonies signifying the start of something new and good. I believe what YOURE referring to, is specifically the materialistic approach some take to weddings, not wedding ceremonies and receptions as a whole. There has never been anything wrong with ceremony and reception, as it has been around since the dawn of marriage itself, and is an inherent part of beginning a marriage and has been for nearly everyone for all of marital history. The issue is a separate one all together, and is rather one of putting on a show to impress others and show off, to try to one up the next person, to fit into an aesthetic, and present yourself a certain way, to see a wedding ceremony as a social stepping stone rather than a ceremony and party celebrating a lifelong bond between a couple and a families, and the start of a new family all together.

[@windyhawthorn7387]

Wedding can be simple but you need great food. An BBQ is where it's at. Lite the smoker and low and slow beef brisket and beef ribs. Make coleslaw, potatoe salad, have fresh fruit, and serve strawberry shortcake. Basically make sure all the food is an ten and you pick an time an place that's not hot or full of mosquitoes. Get married in the morning and have an fun lunch reception. Have it outside with a few activities for people to do and an area for the kids to run-around blowing bubbles. Have hay rides or something. Don't serve alcohol just tea, juice and lemonade. And if there's a body of water nearby it better be somewhere where people can fish. Be a wonderful day outside for everyone.

[@juliam248]

Lol. I asked my husband whether our fairly expensive wedding was a reflection of my selfishness, and he about bit my head off, because his family enjoyed it so much.

[@janelleg597]

It's not just about you. It's about community

[@katie4996]

We had a back yard wedding! Rented a tent, I DIYed all the decorations, catered Mission BBQ and hired a local bartender. About 50 of our closest friends and family were there. It was beautiful. I didn’t even had a DJ. I rented a Bluetooth PA system and hooked up my iPad to it playing an already existing wedding playlist. Then I opened it up to the guests so they could select their own songs!

[@shelivdj3142]

Waited 22 yrs for my wedding, just a small personal intimate wedding. Backyard BBQ with close friends and family

[@phoebehope6549]

We had 22 guests on one long table and it was perfect 💜 We spent the money we would have had on catering for more people on having a 2 day wedding abroad. I couldn't get on board with the idea of having loads of people I'd hardly met staring at me at such an intimate moment, because "if you invite so and so you have to invite their nephew", and spending the reception going from table to table exchanging small talk. We've been married almost 10 years and our friends still talk about how much fun they had 😍

[@sarahsays194]

No shame in wanting a smaller intimate wedding. I'm in my late 30s and have bever been married. I absolutely want the larger more fancy wedding. Just the immediate family on my side would be almost 80 people, over 95% I know would be coming, so planning to do a 150 guest list as long as my future husband doesn’t have a huge family. I'm guessing we'll be spending around $30k. Since I know I want a nicer wedding, I have a wedding fund I put toward monthly as part of my savings. Still looking for Mr. right.

[@hvale759]

Married 8/23. Brett has good advice. Look outside the traditional venders/think outside the box. We chose a church 3 hrs away and got married on a Thursday hoping to keep the guest list down. It worked but didn’t save as much as I hoped and limited our venders. We used the talents of friends too, definitely the way to go. Walmart makes cakes, ours was super pretty, we also had an additional cake because Walmart makes small cakes. We used and bought things we’d use and want to keep, I used thrifted bowls and decor that I’d had in my house as centerpieces, we bought speakers and used Spotify, we bought glass markers and decorated our car instead of a limo, we bought lawn games as guest activities. Kids and parents enjoyed the games and still talk about it, parents basically got a nice lunch out (mid morning wedding) while their kids played outside. One thing I heard about after that would be meaningful and lovely to try is borrowing China from friends and family. Each table would have its own set. My best stress tip is let go of the details and have mental backup plans. We knew what we’d do if the officiant, caterer, or venue needed to be changed at the last minute.

[@jillybean9071]

So many churches have low cost rental for their chapel and reception space and many have decor included. Outdoor weddings, at least in the beautiful pnw where I live, can be so beautiful and low cost. If you are planning your wedding around what "everyone else is doing", keep in mind what everyone else is NOT doing and that is paying your bill for your wedding. Your wedding day should be memorable, but going into debt for a 1 day event is just wild.

[@sbrown8937]

I remember being so stressed out working full time being a part-time student and trying to plan my wedding (this was in 1999). I just surrendered and let my mom plan my wedding. I told her what I wanted and she gave me a very elegant wedding on a modest budget. I'm so grateful she was willing and able to do that for us.

[@Naomi_davis]

Yes, can I please have a bar of SOAP!!

[@emilyshrader15]

I 10000% recommend utilizing the people in your life and their talents. My flowers were on sale/clearance from Hobby Lobby put together by my very talented friend. ALL of our food was made by family/friends and brought the morning of. I've NEVER heard so many compliments on wedding food in my life - so shoutout to my family/friends! Our wedding cake was from Publix, and decorations from mostly Amazon. Our biggest spend items were the venue, pictures, and my dress. But even those were the cheaper options but worked out perfectly. We picked a smaller venue, mainly for what they did during the night (serving, cleaning, etc), so our guest list was smaller. We picked our CLOSEST family and friends (ie those that we spoke with most often, not aunts/cousins that we see once a year). Those aunts and cousins got pissed off at us, but honestly, as stress free the day was, I wouldn't change a thing. Those types of people just confirmed that they would've added drama to the day anyway. All this to say, do whatever YOU want to do!! Remove other people's opinions.. this is your day, not theirs. Also, they're not paying for it, so they shouldn't have a say so.