Don't Keep It Casual.

[@EVERYGOODNAMEISTAKEN]

Every generation has its rebels that stray from the norm. Now that Gen Z's norm is being weird, the Gen Z rebels are bringing back normality and tradition

[@AlekseyMaksimovichPeshkov]

Now that the norm is A.I generated everything...

[@JimMilnerTHX138]

I kinda like it. I get to be a rebel and everything but maintain a traditionalist life.

[@RobertTaylor-gz2fu]

@@JimMilnerTHX138 That's a contradiction.

[@bv332fgh]

​@@RobertTaylor-gz2fu You mean like Gen Z is a contradiction?

[@SmellsAddicted]

​@@RobertTaylor-gz2fu He's saying a rebel of the rebels of tradition is traditional.

[@Limegreenscorpion94]

Whoever’s telling you, “Brett you talk about dating too much” is wrong. As a young college dude, all the dating advice is appreciated and very much needed, love the content cause it helps so much.

[@lasshrugged]

I'm one of the viewers that doesn't care much about the dating topic, but I'm not gonna say what type of content is too much.

[@Dontrolling]

It is so relevant and will always be

[@GassedFEIN]

Listening to dating advice is the first mistake. You either got game or you don’t, it’s really that simple.

[@ShowLSWH]

On our first date my wife told me her three goals in life were to be a mom, have a kitchen with an island, and adopt a "fleet of pet raccoons." I knew right there. We got married exactly one year later.

[@GabrielleTollerson]

I love this!! 😄

[@DavidZ4-gg3dm]

Did you get pet raccoons?

[@Ruminatinghafez]

Also known as a trash Navy

[@logantidwell7698]

Did you get the trash pandas yet?

[@DavidZ4-gg3dm]

@@GabrielleTollerson You wouldn't like several raccoons in your house!

[@brandanpalmer]

Aight screw it. I’ll put myself out there starting here. Wd I got to lose? Single guy, 25, good job, live in Vermont. 6ft, Christian, love my dog an unreasonable amount, want kids, want marriage, and I like hiking, love cooking and making drinks, writing and reading and video games and going to the gym which I should do more. So… yeah.

[@Rebecca-zj8xi]

I'll respond back, I don't have much to lose either. Single women, 24, have a good job and no debt, live in Louisiana. 5ft, Christian, I love both cats and dogs. I want marriage and kids (in that order), I like going out into the woods as well as rock hounding. I'm not the best cook but I can make some pretty good desserts. I love making arts and crafts, reading, and videogames. I exercise but not at the gym, however I'm not opposed to going.

[@zerothehero.takeasip6612]

My fellas here are doing proto-tinder lmao. Respect?

[@brandanpalmer]

@@zerothehero.takeasip6612 🤷🏼‍♂️. I’m self-aware enough to know I don’t put myself out there, and I do genuinely like this community. Chances of finding a like-minded person is probably higher, but yeah…

[@brandanpalmer]

@@Rebecca-zj8xi nice to meet you, Rebecca. Lmao I haven’t decided the best way to get in contact off KZbin, but I’m just gonna embrace how strange this probably is. You have a preference?

[@elliotcanant]

If you two get married, I hope Brett interviews you guys on the show since yall met in her comments section 🙏🏻🧡

[@Rumpelsplitskin]

What is ironic is Gen Z keep talking about how traumatized they are over the least little thing. With situationships they are putting themselves in harms way (meeting strangers through dating apps) and could potentially end up in a really traumatic event.

[@bm5_5_5]

Really good point

[@CyberWarezz05]

What is more ironic is that they think this is a good idea because "you are not lonely while you wait for the right person, so win-win", but then they start to realize that they fell in love with that person, and when their "partner" finds the right person, the other becomes miserable and actually hates the "situationship". I saw a lot of tiktoks of people in this situation that even stated that "situationships are a really bad idea".

[@Rumpelsplitskin]

@@CyberWarezz05 I agree. It's all fun and games until they 'catch feelings.' The heartbreak they would feel would be their own doing. In the same breath they'd blame the other person for breaking their heart even though it is a no strings attached situation.

[@CyberWarezz05]

@@Rumpelsplitskin It baffles me that people in situationships think that it's a win for them because they have a friend with benefits that they use until "the right person arrives". But what if the FWB was the right person all along? What if the friend finds the right person first? 😂 And I'm not gonna be absurd. I'm aware that bad things happen in normal relationships (cheating, partner finding another person etc), but the difference here is that these things are not normal or encouraged.

[@Rumpelsplitskin]

​@@CyberWarezz05 They're not being good friends neither by using them. Even in bad relationships they can be used as a learning curve to spot red flags and grow into a stronger person. Relationships can be about learning just as much as finding the right one.

[@kamikamiteehee]

don't even get into situationships. date to marry. keep yourself pure. people aren't a commodity, so don't treat your body as one. it's that simple smh.

[@mtngrl5859]

Most young women don't realize that chastity simplifies one's life. When it is understood that you have no intention of being sexually intimate until marriage, it really separates the real men from the players. Dating has a purpose and it is to find your forever mate, if others aren't on the same page they are wasting your time. It's better to focus on your personal faith, working on improving yourself, education etc. Too many people are dealing with heart aches from unsuitable people.

[@PrimalInstinct0704]

​@@mtngrl5859I'm kinda curious what the divorce rate is for people that are virgins when they marry. Or at least one of the people is. Probably still the same rate.

[@jmz2144]

​@@mtngrl5859There is nothing wrong with sexual intimacy in a committed relationship, even Biblically the concept of marriage was created by tribes who lived in tents

[@JesseOaks-ef9xn]

Amen!

[@Laceykat66]

"Situationship" was made up to justify Hookup culture. I agree with you.

[@aubreycarter7624]

When my husband and I first started talking in the spring of 2020, I immediately brought up the big topics: politics, religion, future kids, that I wanted to be a mom and not a career woman, as well as a couple "conspiracy theories" that I believe to be true. And he brought up finances and the career that he wanted. We were able to either agree or meet each other in the middle on every topic! After our first official date, I knew that if he asked, I would marry him. Two weeks later, he proposed. We got married 7 months later and have been married for almost 4 years and have 2 adorable kids. Don't be afraid to have the big conversations early! It can really help you weed through people that you just aren't compatible with. The sooner you know, the sooner you can either commit or move on.!

[@jmz2144]

Are you mormon?

[@mbanerjee5889]

It's not a situationship, it just a booty call.

[@AshleyChing-c3o]

Or it can be reframed as casual dating

[@odawgbrazy14]

EXACTLY

[@Kujirakira]

@@AshleyChing-c3o Why do ya'll do this? It's not prostitution, it's escorting. It's not escorting, it's sugar baby. Whatever word you want to come up with to make it seem less bad, trust... we all know it's the same thing.

[@drich8806]

Yep. They are opting to take whatever scraps of time and attention the men they perceive as top tier will give them, rather than something fulfilling with a man they consider average, and they needed a less insulting name for it than booty call.

[@OneNiftyBoi]

@@AshleyChing-c3o Casual dating is an oxymoron. It's like Open Marriage. Apparently, the modern days are full of these terms so I think we can see where our problem is coming from.

[@TomDrake-A1A]

Has there ever been a generation more encouraged at every turn to reject 'traditional' values? Also, if Brett lost the use of her hands and arms, would she still be able to communicate?

[@JessicaBranley-Desjarlais]

Lol😂

[@thiccactus]

She'll never stop as long as the cocaine keeps flowing.

[@Dancky2]

I can't unsee it now

[@maxinefreeman8858]

My mother talked with her hands. She didn't talk as fast. I guess that's why I actually like it.

[@JayFulcanelli--111]

Coming from an Italian family, we definitely need the hands lol

[@ajl3267]

As a girl who just turned 18 you inspire me so much Brett! Being a conservative teen girl is always a challenge but knowing other people share my values helps so much.

[@RobertTaylor-gz2fu]

Do you enjoy being celibate?

[@james_M_magee]

Nice to meet you I know this is an unconventional way to meet someone but would you like to talk to each other about dating?

[@reanschwarzer2187]

@@ajl3267 if you play your cards right don’t sleep around you’ll have the pick of the top options. I will say as you get older though very few people are going to believe you didn’t sleep around. That’s just how it is but I recommend dating seriously much better to build with someone over a long period of time. At 28 mostly it just seems like a cost I already struggled went through the hard times and pain by myself now many girls just want the rewards from my hard work. Or just have less incentive as I’m already kinda set and would be weird almost to have someone else around. Best of luck 👍

[@betsysanders4524]

Congratulations on holding on to your values! If it were an easy thing to do…everyone would be doing it. Find someone who shares your values that you can talk to & support each other. Wishing you all the best!

[@james_M_magee]

@@ajl3267 also, I am a very much conservative guy

[@downloadstuffgames]

'Those who lack the courage will always find a philosophy to justify it.' - Albert Camus

[@viannyp2028]

I agree, people tend to justify the most insane things ever.

[@GassedFEIN]

@@viannyp2028not wanting kids really isn’t insane at all. It’s pretty normal tbh.

[@banquo3336]

Interdependence is not codependence. Not engaging in behaviors that aren't in your best interest is not insecurity. Having expectations is not control. Showing care for someone's emotional wellbeing is not taking responsibility for their feelings. People like this pathologize attachment, not because there's something inherently disordered or erroneous about it, but becasue it interferes with these lifestyles that prioritize self interest over partnership. Ignore the pop psychology. Don't fear the experience of deep meaningful love.

[@alenaadamkova5322]

It is when parents allow teens to experience life through social media (or false advertisement) and not touch the grass first, in real life. then the teens become woke not knowing how real world and healthy boundaries work.

[@ohlilu3317]

I really like how you highlighted differences between unhealthy behaviors, like codependency, and totally normal ones, like caring for the person you love. The only thing I disagree with though is the advice to ignore pop psychology. I follow quite a few professionals specializing in different areas and have regular sessions with my therapist. Nothing in what they tell/advice reduces value of deep meaningful connection/love. Instead, a lot of information helps to distinguish between loving and abusive behaviors (like, care vs control, for instance). I think, important thing is to keep your own critical thinking on and don’t just take all the information from the internet at face value.

[@KatlynHaydon]

Personal opinion, casual sex is almost ALWAYS someone who has low self esteem and someone who is using the other. Do not ever do this. It is detrimental to you in every way.

[@l.jvd1]

Definitely. I used to be the former and it messed me up. I thought it was giving me confidence, and it was short-term, but ruining me from the inside in the long-term. Then my ex husband finished it with sexual abuse because I was too weak. It has been a hard work trying to heal from it all.

[@Robert-xs2mv]

My casual sex means a visit to the brothel, no one is using anyone and neither have low self esteem issues, but rather the opposite. Both participants benefit from, hence in different ways. Sure there are drawbacks, but what in life does not?

[@pocahontas-je2ip]

I disagree, casual sex majorly is just a natural response, physical attraction is there, it's normal people want to bang and not related with self esteem or whatever, which there is situations of using sex for validation. The question is, why should they not be having sex without any level of long term commitment? Why should they care about the consequences?

[@rievaulxlucienne1176]

I would actually say exactly the same about monogamists. It's a selfish romantic position to take. It's all about you and it endorses and cements narcissism within you.

[@unavailable2you]

what’s crazy is you’re all trying to be “right” in a matter of personal choice & opinion. what doesn’t work for you could have the opposite effect for someone else. these people want us to all be the same, they want us to hate each other. whether they realize it or not, that is exactly what they’re doing. almost always.

[@meleebrawler6462]

Reject situationships, embrace courting.

[@Bibi-do8tc]

I gave you an audible 'yes.' Please proceed.

[@ilai7893]

Maybe not courting of days past 😅 but moving toward making things official and exclusive with intentionality and open communication

[@RobertTaylor-gz2fu]

No thank you. I love being free & single.

[@RobertTaylor-gz2fu]

@@Bibi-do8tc Definitely not - I only want NSA action.

[@RobertTaylor-gz2fu]

@@ilai7893 I much prefer to be free & single.

[@mr2oxking]

I think the greatest issue that cracked society and continues to tear it apart is the complete lack of community and everyone basically being completely socially and emotionally isolated 95% of the time with most social interactions requiring you to perform rather than being yourself.

[@kni9ght]

We had community and unity, certain people and groups saw this is has a threat than tried to destroyed it

[@mr2oxking]

@@kni9ght “we” refers to?

[@kni9ght]

@@mr2oxking just general people, wasn’t trying to be specific and probably should have said Americans, thank you for helping me clarify

[@mr2oxking]

@@kni9ght I’d argue that Americans haven’t had a community for a long time, but I don’t know enough about history to pinpoint exactly when or how they fell apart. But I do think that it’s an international effort by some people to prevent real communities from forming as it’s so easy to manipulate people on an individual level.

[@kni9ght]

@@mr2oxking my thoughts exactly and IMO I point to the early 60’s that started the shifting of culture to more consumerism with the “keeping up with the jones” mentality that lingers to this very day

[@stiekamp3912]

I knew that my husband was the one when early in our relationship, I casually brought up marriage and children. Instead of him running away, we talked for a few hours on that subject. He wasn't as sure at that point, and it took him a few more months. Twenty-one years later, we've been happily married for nineteen years. 😊

[@aftoncrain2042]

This happened to me at 17 and I was a mess for nearly a year. DO NOT allow yourself to be strung along; You deserve to be committed to. If he won't commit, you'll find better.

[@ericson_of_eric]

@@aftoncrain2042 People always say that, but what do you mean, "Better"? Its my personal observation that most people just settle, when they get tired of searching. And then cling to the memory of the unrequited love as "The one who got away".

[@RvnClw-e8d]

@ericson_of_eric nah getting strung along for years isn’t love. When we find a good man who we love and loves us we look back laughing at how dumb we were for settling for less and thank God that we got away from the “unrequited love.” Because once you realize what real love looks like- the situationship we had before wasn’t even comparable. That’s the experience of me and my friends at least.

[@blutomindpretzel1735]

HE won't commit? Women do it too....

[@joress]

@@blutomindpretzel1735True

[@joress]

@@ericson_of_ericSettling for some reason is considered bad today but it’s the point of dating: you eventually settle with someone to spend the rest of your lives together.

[@DraQinn]

I'm a millennial and I still ran into that issue when dating in my early 20s, girls refusing to be tired down to one relationship and sought out excitement in "free love".

[@POPINCONEJO88]

Not just Sex In The City but also FRIENDS, it's basically a show about friends with benefits

[@jeremiahjohnson2519]

THEY WERE ON A BREAK!

[@adriano1309]

@@jeremiahjohnson2519 at least it had a happy ending lol

[@hansgrueber8169]

@@adriano1309 not for naked guy...

[@POPINCONEJO88]

@@hansgrueber8169 that's ugly naked guy put some respect on his name, he got to be naked with Ross

[@clickbait1602]

The Office is better in that sense lmao

[@taryndancer29]

"Don't keep it casual" had to learn this the hard way. Being in love with your situationship who didn't love you back is truly an awful feeling and I wouldn't wish that on anyone.

[@truekiropfan8329]

Yup. Been there, done that, hated it. I was even young and stupid enough a few years ago to, even WORSE, fall in love with a girl that already had a boyfriend! I figured I could change that. Turns out, yeah no, that went exactly as you’d expect, and was a complete disaster! The girl herself was a walking trainwreck anyways, so we would have been terrible together, but at least I learned a lot from that epic failure (the reason I ever fell for her was a very very terrible break-up a month or two before we met, and when we met, we ended up having some light, non-romantic chemistry that I mistook for romantic thanks to my terrible mental state).

[@nmikulics]

As much as I do agree with this sentiment, my husband took 7 years to propose. We met when we were 22/23, started dating at 23/24, he proposed when we were 30/31, married 8 months after that. Now two kids later & working on saving for our second home, I can honestly say I married my best friend. Would I go back & have him propose sooner? Sure. But he wouldn't have been ready (he has said exactly that) & we probably would not be nearly as strong as we are today. Not saying getting married young doesn't work...just saying getting married "later" CAN work, too.

[@DolphinWithIgloo-fg3ow]

Breeding age for women is a much smaller window. It’s a gamble. It was even worse before vaccines that lowered infant mortality and modern appliances and modern medicine. Soon it’ll be mostly IVF for later years past the window. I’m also glad my gf has a best friend that isn’t me.

[@blessed4737]

Your story is so different than mine. We met at 14 and I knew I'd marry my now husband. We dated from 18 to 20 and got married at 20. We were in a religious cult and didn't have much say over our lives lol. We are still happily married 10 yrs later, but boy, did we go through it with each other. We literally watched each other grow up, and I had lot of baggage from my dysfunctional family. My husband got into drugs alcohol ect.we had 4 kids at the age 28 yrs old. My husband is now 3 yrs clean and we left the religious cult 2.5 yrs ago. Our marriage is in a very good place now, and we had to give each other the space to figure out who we even are as adults since we got together so young and started having babies immediately. The only thing I'd change if I could would be to have my kids later so that my 2 oldest would've had a more stable beginning in life.

[@jmz2144]

Brett is only saying that because she married some 30 year old loser simply to be married

[@isabelbard853]

I think a good question for your relationship is whether you were having sex before marriage. If so, you were already acting as if you were married, but your husband wasn't committed to you. If not, you were really wasting time being committed to each other for a long time when you could have been meeting other men who might have been more ready to commit to being married to you on your timeline. I'm glad your husband finally committed to you, but a key part of dating is trying not to get used and abused, which is why sex should be saved for marital commitment.

[@nmikulics]

@@isabelbard853 we'll just have to agree to disagree! 🙂

[@susanpumphrey354]

We had been dating three months when my husband said to me, "You *are* going to marry me someday, right?" I told him that sounded good to me. 🥰 It was the first relationship for either one of us. He was 16. I was 18. That was 32 years ago. No regrets. 🥰

[@jmz2144]

Statutory 😳

[@joeyjojojrshabadoo7462]

@@jmz2144 romeo and juliet laws, Re; Tranfomers 4

[@rievaulxlucienne1176]

@@jmz2144 Huh? In Colorado, we have a ten year exception for 15 and 16. That means 23 with 15 is 100% legal in Colorado.

[@jaspriest1997]

@@rievaulxlucienne1176if you have to explain why it’s ‘technically’ legal, you probably shouldn’t be doing it

[@Ruminatinghafez]

@@jmz2144 yeah that's not the case in any state, nor morally. Droll

[@Lawrence_Talbot]

I still wish DW would bring on a young male to talk about the single guy’s experience in “modern” American

[@reanschwarzer2187]

They can’t it would crush a lot of their ideas and hopes frankly if your actually aware of the stats

[@PrimalInstinct0704]

Maybe you should recommend someone to them then lol.

[@PrimalInstinct0704]

​@@reanschwarzer2187I'm confused by that statement lol. What are you referring to?

[@ArielGonzalez1]

​@@PrimalInstinct0704it would break their gynocentric, men are at fault, narrative (hence why they are also against redpill-ish principles)

[@reanschwarzer2187]

@@PrimalInstinct0704 I think if you had the average man and looked at the success rate and the standards today I think the daily wire would be shocked by the demands today. Many of their commentary on young men is the idea of like a fat loser. In reality many are just regular average guys. I think they are a bit out of touch and be surprised by how bad the dating world is. The lotus eaters did a similar deal and they have a younger guy that explained how out of touch they were.

[@MrBerg4ever]

A coworker of mine saved up a month of vacation time. He got married but only spent like $3000 at his house where the wedding was. This was done so he and his fiance could go on a month long honeymoon. He said that was the best decision that they could have made after getting married.

[@Minksy81]

Yes, my husband and I got married at the courthouse so we could spend our savings on a month's honeymoon. Best decision I ever made! 😊

[@DDD11239]

I spent $3,000 on my home gym. Better use of money (aside from investments).

[@JoJo-op5xy]

I did both big wedding and month long honeymoon. I enjoyed most of the vacation but not the wedding. I wish I would’ve done something really small. I recommend an intimate wedding.

[@johnclark3531]

800 for our backyard wedding, covid was the best excuse to go small.

[@Fred2-123]

We got married at the courthouse in Reno so we could buy enough gas to get back to Colorado.

[@scottsandmeyer]

Perfectly encapsulated by the phrase "dating apps are designed to addict you!" Absolutely.

[@anestassia6346]

My husband and I started dating freshman year of high school at 14 and 15 years old. He told me he wanted to marry me… we’ve now been together for literally half our lives. We’ve grown together, started a family, gone through life’s ups and downs together, and grown more and more in love. I’m truly blessed ❤

[@Stirthepotwithscott]

I was in a situationship...it never ends well

[@tamarmilenewicz7932]

Brett I NEEDED this video, I’ve been in 3 situationships and they have left me with emotional trauma. Thank you for being such an inspiration! I hope to move forward and avoid at all costs any more situationships in my future!

[@Mrs.Butterworth]

I'm 56, and situationships are definitely not a Gen Z thing. When I was in my 20s, there were, booty calls, non-committed relationships, friends with benefits, etc. My parents generation in the 60s was all about free love and key parties. You decide whether to participate or look for someone with your same values.

[@xandercruz900]

Go back to the 50s and dating around was not that uncommon. I literally saw a video of teens in the 50s saying as much. Maybe in more country communities was it different.

[@robertclark5874]

Gen Z = the ultimate prudes! 😅

[@zrally2107]

Friend zone- girl gets all the benefits of a relationship without the draw backs of dating the man. Situation ship- guy gets all the benefits of a relationship without the draw backs of dating the woman.

[@Cationna]

I'd argue with "all" benefits, but I get what you're saying.

[@hansgrueber8169]

@@Cationna Situation-ship = Slam Hog.

[@Ruminatinghafez]

Neither friend zone nor a situation ship offer the real benefits of a relationship. Vapid.

[@pocahontas-je2ip]

@@Ruminatinghafez It depends, people only look for what they need, depending if they are looking for short term or long term benefits. In this case it's short term, so yeah they are getting all the benefits they need

[@ericson_of_eric]

​@@dinosaur___7209Lmao. You're right, that guy is just making it up.

[@Mila_Nelson]

I love that trend. My husband (of 15 years) proposed after 3 weeks of dating, married 6 months later, and we are still going strong. I couldn’t imagine doing life any other way.

[@jadedragon5591]

As a 24yr old woman I almost got sucked into this whole girl boss ideal, thankfully I met a REAL man who uplifts me, roots for & believes in me and wants to start a family with me.. my heart goes out to all these women in their 30s who are so lost and let down by the system that they tried so hard to girl boss into.. so so sad

[@darrenhorgan5060]

Greetings random comments section scroller. Have an awesome day😊

[@victoriacavalcante2318]

😊😉

[@Smilealot62]

😂 🙋🏽‍♀️

[@anneshirley95]

You too!

[@Ruminatinghafez]

@@darrenhorgan5060 👁️👄👁️

[@Crazymotoman03]

Thanks friend. Same to you!

[@babyblue28]

I will only ever date to marry. I believe in abstinence until marriage so what would be the point otherwise (other than emotional connection and love for someone of course)

[@jmz2144]

You're gonna risk marrying someone you don't know you're sexually compatible with?

[@masonseminario7435]

That’s what I thought in high school. I’ve just turned 18 and never dated a girl in my life, so now I have no clue how to casually talk to women and fall in love with them.

[@DavidZ4-gg3dm]

I only date to bone.

[@Ruminatinghafez]

​@@jmz2144 adolescent attitude

[@truekiropfan8329]

@@masonseminario7435Find a girl that you are attracted to, that likes and cares about you, that shares your values, and has chemistry with you. I can guarantee that you will be completely and utterly and hopelessly in love. Look for green flags in your relationship, signs that your relationship is strong, healthy, and non-toxic. A good example of a green flag? Honesty and open communication in your relationship.

[@Megumi.-.]

Ad starts at 7:42 , ends at 9:05

[@Cowboy_pilot]

Thank you brotha

[@austynr]

get sponsorblock

[@bv332fgh]

Thanks homie

[@melissakooienga4784]

Doing the Lords work

[@BillyBob-ue9lu]

God bless you brother. Brett is ruthless with her Segways...

[@theoneandonlyjulietlove]

I think part of the reason gen z is so hesitant to be in a committed relationship and get married is because so many of us have divorced parents and don’t want to go through what they have been through

[@Mattrz34]

Possibly, but I and I’d hope some others want a healthy relationship cause we see our parents not healthy ones

[@jmz2144]

Yeah, marriage is a scam

[@rievaulxlucienne1176]

@@Mattrz34 Monogamy is unhealthy.

[@rachelh1720]

​@@rievaulxlucienne1176 Yes it's so unhealthy that it's literally been the bedrock of civilizations for millenia and we're in such a great place now that we've rejected it as a society

[@mckinnonbathie5945]

@@rievaulxlucienne1176 The only thing worse is polygamy and loneliness

[@Lex_1_3]

I am so beyond grateful for my boyfriend (future husband). He’s literally my best friend and we inspire each-other to be better on our own and together. Committed relationships can be so beautiful. Really happy I woke up and was able to see that.

[@pocahontas-je2ip]

By best friend, you mean he only gets sex once a year maybe, while posting photos online for other dudes to see right?

[@theoverlord4ir]

Yea I turned 18 this year and commitment and marriage is what I want and always have. But because I’m genZ I have no idea of how to date and flirt and after all the horror stories of dating and the general culture around dating for my generation I don’t see the point in trying to learn. To any other guys who are share a similar mindset, stay strong and work on yourself but don’t isolate yourself find something that you enjoy that also gets you out and talking to other people, who knows maybe thats how you’ll meet your partner.

[@truekiropfan8329]

I can relate. I’m 23 (and just about a half, in a little over 6 months I turn 24) and my not-officially girlfriend (it’s complicated, she said no when I asked her out, I asked if we could at least be friends, which she agreed to, but now she’s coming across as more than a bit in love, as I’m both the only guy outside of her family she regularly interacts with, which is odd, and I know for a fact that I annoy her sometimes, but she puts up with me anyways, and as well, she’s always super excitable and smile-y when I talk to her) just turned 21, but we can relate. I’m an absolute noob when it comes to dating (I have relationship experience, but none of them ever made it to dating), and can’t flirt worth anything, and she’s a complete and total virgin. Not just sexually, but in terms of relationships too, I don’t believe she’s ever even had a relationship before, let alone dated. The two of us have absolutely no idea what we’re doing. We pretty much just make it up as we go along, try to be completely honest and open with each other about how we feel, and give each other superhuman amounts of grace. When we start dating (she wants to finish college before dating, which I respect as a sensible position to have, school before love and all that), it’s not going to be easy or simple, but it should at least be pretty short. Neither of us are the type to shop around, if we were to date, it would be specifically because we already believe we belong together as a couple. Dating would almost be the wrong word. It would for sure be courting (dating specifically one person alone specifically toward the goal of marriage). But yeah, our generation (Gen Z) just by and large was never taught how to correctly date or even flirt. The problem is exacerbated if you were homeschooled like we were.

[@theoverlord4ir]

@@truekiropfan8329 yea I was also homeschooled and very introverted when I was younger. Luckily I grew out of most of that and I’m not socially awkward or anything I do fine in social settings just like everyone else, but I never seek out opportunities to be social with other people my age. There is a myriad of other things id rather do than listen to other people my age parrot different BS off TikTok. PS: I hope everything works out between you and your “not-officially girlfriend” stay strong brother best of luck 💪

[@truekiropfan8329]

Thanks. I’m actually a hybrid myself. I am extroverted personality-wise, but as much as people give me energy in the moment via making me a bit hyper, I do find being around people draining overall, and I need regular alone-time breaks, just as introverts do. Unlike you, I’m extremely socially awkward (one of the reasons I didn’t expect my currently not-officially girlfriend to even tolerate me, let alone care about me like she now does), but then, I’m on the high end of the Autism Spectrum. Socializing, even just to make some friends with other dudes, is important, but you’re also most easily going to find your future wife by in-person socializing, as dating apps are useless. My not-officially girlfriend and I technically met through our church’s Young Adult Bible Study Group which we attend together when she’s home from college (though I actually introduced myself briefly the Sunday before the new quarter of the group, the first time that I attended the group, started), and that kind of thing is where I’d recommend you look. Also, if you’re looking for people in general to surround yourself with that can’t be bothered to have social media (a plague) or TikTok (absolute garbage and spyware) addictions, there’s no better place to start than attending a group like that. None of the members in our group are into that kind of garbage. And tying into the theme of this video, when she gets home for her winter break, I think I’m going to look into getting us officially labeled, and saying first (because she’s traditional, she’s not going to say it first, she’ll let me take my role) that I love her (not that it would come as any surprise to her, I’ve been very loving towards her the whole time). I think we’re just about ready. She’s showing a lot of green flags that seem to indicate she might be ready to claim her title of my girlfriend, though she absolutely will wait for me to ask her because, as I said, she’s traditional. I appreciate the well-wish, as I’m going to be a little nervous. But don’t worry, I won’t be TOO stressed, she’s my best friend too. The calm to my storm, the peace to my chaos, she’s always so calm that I can’t help but be reasonably calm whenever I’m around her.

[@theoverlord4ir]

@@truekiropfan8329 yea I recognize that places like a Young Adult Bible Study Group and just church in general are are a good place to look for people like that however it’s just not for me. I do like learning about religion but I am far from being a religious person and thus attending something like that with people who actually are religious I would feel rather dishonest/shallow attending. Thanks for the advice though. Hope winter break goes well for you.

[@live.travel.]

the lack of communication and commitment these days is ridiculous. I'm not gen-z, but it feels as though those around my age are from that generation. My Mom said it was bad dating back in the 80's (until she met my Dad) but is astounded at how bad it is now, and yet this is a major reason why I can't find anyone these days. My grandparents went on 6 dates total before they got married in the 50's (there was physical distance as a factor, but my Grandpa knew almost immediately he was to marry her), and they got married in 1955, and they both just passed away recently. I know real love exists, it's just difficult to find someone who is as ready and committed as I am, but I know he's out there.

[@kayrenee404]

I met my husband on tinder at 23. We had a surprise pregnancy 6 months into our relationship. Our baby will be 3 in January. We welcomed our second baby this past summer and just celebrated our second wedding anniversary. Before I met him, I never wanted any of these things. Now that I have this life with him and our babies, I couldn’t imagine a world without them and I’ll 10000% take this life over being single and swiping.

[@TalkToMe2Day]

I didn't marry my wife until 2021. We started dating in 2014. We definitely were not in a situationship in that we were only dating each other, but don't get married until you are ready and don't let people make you think you are odd for not feeling ready/knowing you'll marry them in 1-30 days. Pushing a narrative that finding someone who knows they'll marry you after a day is just as toxic as people pushing you should always string people along. For my wife and I, I knew long before we got married that she was the person I wanted to marry. She had a lot to grown in financial health. I had (have) a lot to grow in EQ. We got married when we were on the same page in our life goals and we both had confidence in each other that we were both walking the path we talked. Marriage doesn't lead to happiness. Happiness leads to marriage. Or, at least that should be the causal relationship.

[@Rachel-xg7hs]

For generations, parents have told their children not to sleep around in their teen years. Gen Z finally listened, and suddenly everyone’s mad that we’re “not normal” because we aren’t positively sex-crazed. We really, truly can’t win.

[@OmgMissy]

THIS! 22 here and I think our generation is on such a weird pendulum within relationships and sexuality. We’re not as sex-crazed and there’s apparently been an increase in young ppl being abstinent atm (✌🏻), yet we’re the most exposed to hyper sexualization through social media. It’s one extreme or the other with us tbh xD

[@ShaftCommander]

The generations past encouraged their teenagers to not have sex is due to control, lack of proper education and parents flat out wanting to avoid the subject all together. Information is a lot of accessible these days and people are educating them better, and surprise-surprise, due to all that, exploring your sexuality in a healthy manner during your teen years is turning out to be a good thing!

[@robertclark5874]

Brilliant point!! 💯 My grandmother was born in the 1930s and she and her sisters are storied to have had some wild times in their 20s. And then she raised 5 good kids. Maybe just need to stop the shaming

[@odawgbrazy14]

Found the victims congregating!

[@Rachel-xg7hs]

@@odawgbrazy14 How am I a victim?

[@dylanh182]

I met my wife back in highschool. She was running across the street and bumped into me and I had to catch her so she didn't fall. But as soon as I saw her I knew I wanted to be with her. We're happily married for 9 years and have a son.

[@FlamingCockatiel]

We need a video of stories like yours.

[@CyberWarezz05]

Maybe it's a matter of preference, I don't know, but I could never be with someone "just to not be lonely, but I still get to keep my independence". I think there is beauty in falling in love with someone, getting to know that person, having a relationship with them and even claiming that they are your soulmate. This whole "situationship" thing reminds me of when we were kids and we had a best friend and we thought that we were gonna be best friends forever, until they make a new best friend and you're left there thinking "but I thought I was your best friend".

[@immaduck9232]

4:30 Gen Z keeps yelling "Codependence!" Bruh, I was reading about codependence like 8 years ago. Have you ever read a book about it, Gen Z? Just one? Any? No! Probably not. You hear something about it and then get scared of it, and rationalize not committing. When you are independent first, and then get into a relationship, you can be interdependent (feed each other, add to each other's lives) and it is the best type of relationship. Better than being alone. Not wise yet, try again.

[@blepblep469]

lol I stupidly stayed with a “situationship” for a while because I thought I could change her, but nope. You can’t make anything out of a relationship so dysfunctional from the beginning

[@iviaverick52]

If you are romantically interested in someone, just say "I like you, I'd like to take you out on a date." PERIOD. If they say no, move on! Do not be cool with just being friends. It's a waste of time because when you do find the right person and get married, do you really think your spouse is going to be cool with you staying friends with someone you wanted to bang?

[@brianthesnail3815]

It doesn't always work that way. It took my wife a while to get to know me although I knew I liked her a lot. We worked closely together and it would have been a big mistake to go rushing in. Forty years later it's still good.

[@melitajay]

I don't think you have to drop someone just because they didn't reciprocate. If someone is worth being with romantically, they're worth being friends with. Mature people can maintain the boundary.

[@CBC460]

💯

[@simply11believelane47]

I'm taking my gf completely off the market soon. Alrdy got the ring🙌

[@reanschwarzer2187]

Best of luck man

[@simply11believelane47]

@@reanschwarzer2187 yeh might need it lolll. She is different n came from parents who had solid marriage. She's not a feminist either

[@reanschwarzer2187]

@@simply11believelane47 good deal definitely a rarer thing today unfortunately but solid start from the description you gave

[@masonseminario7435]

Good luck

[@Mariesrares]

@@masonseminario7435simps

[@CheesyAceGameplay]

3 months & She went stone cold after I asked her to be official. Heart break was/is in full effect. Hurt a lot. Oh well. I don’t regret it. I’m glad I had to the courage to be vulnerable. Will do it again too.

[@kouhai2456]

I cannot imagine dating someone without the intent of learning whether or not you're compatible for marriage one day. Like... what's the point of dating, then? If you know you don't want to marry this person, why are you wasting your (and their!!) time?

[@ShreyaBabulall]

Exactly

[@RanchoSantaAnadelChino]

Everyone is compatible for an estranged marriage. Doesn't mean anything.

[@kouhai2456]

@@RanchoSantaAnadelChino and that's why you look for someone that you both deem capable of spending each other's life with, so you _don't_ end up in that estranged marriage!

[@RanchoSantaAnadelChino]

@@kouhai2456 An estranged marriage is just as much of a marriage as any other marriage.

[@MegaTeeruk]

I am in my late 40s now but waiting until my mid 30s to get married. In the time leading up to that I dated plenty of women but wanted to wait until I knew it was right because I'd seen so many bad relationships in my family. All I can say is my god when you get it right it is truly incredible. We've been together just shy of 20 years, counting dating, and I cannot imagine ever being happier or more fulfilled in a relationship. All I can say to you younger folks is truly letting yourself be madly in love with someone is the most incredible thing you can do.

[@jinx6094]

Im in my last year of school and finding someone to date seems almost impossible. I would like to marry someday but with how my generation treats relationships and the fact that im already pretty shy makes it extremely difficult

[@Mattrz34]

You don’t need to date anyone lol, especially with the transition to college

[@jmz2144]

You're cooked bruh

[@midnight434]

These replies aren’t helpful 😒 if you want to date you should, of course assuming that you take your education seriously and are mature. I also am really, really shy but you could try finding people through your hobbies. Have faith that you’ll find someone 🫶🏾

[@Mattrz34]

@@midnight434 dating ur senior yr of highschool is asking for a breakup 💀

[@friedawells6860]

@7:00 Brett's rant about trying to be a "cool girl" and pretend that you don't care about commitment is so good. That's the biggest mistake you can make as a young girl, pretending that you don't care about commitment and renting your body out for free just so that you'll seem "chill" to whatever guy youre currently interested in. There will be others, better to just let the guys who only want sex move along!

[@matildacriley]

I’m 22 and have never been in a relationship, I want to be in a relationship with someone I have fallen in love with & that then will lead to marriage and starting a family with that person, not a long string of casual relationships that have no substance and lead nowhere - that’s why I hate that we live in a world where high body counts and casual relationships are so common and normalised.

[@nexuslite]

Make it happen. You are in control. The next guy you say "Hi" to could be your future husband.

[@ShreyaBabulall]

Omg same here with me, I'd rather wait honestly. I mean if people are going to treat this like a game then go in with a strategy

[@JohnAnderson-ev3lp]

I thought that as well, 30 and alone 🤣

[@user-foreverfree]

My husband talked about marriage on our second date. Honestly scared me a bit, but the security and knowing he's committed is the most amazing thing ever. I never have to worry that he'll leave. He won't

[@Ver.3gA-06]

Do ppl really think that you can't do anything after you get married? And that you *must* spend 100% on the marriage/relationship? It's called a work life balance. It's possible to be in a committed relationship and still focus on a career. These ppl just can't multi task

[@snappy_gilmore]

I love this. There was nothing casual about my relationship with my husband, except that we were friends for a couple years before we started dating. We dated for two months, he proposed, we were engaged for 6 days, then finally got married. This December will be 4 years of marriage and I love our life together. I've been an active participant in "hook-up culture" before and it doesn't even compare to having the love and security that comes from my marriage. I love him more than anything and he feels the same way about me.

[@Lyssa16]

The fact that I met the my incredible fiancé and the father of my 12 day old on a dating app feels like such an anomaly with all the horror stories I hear

[@janaiahalexandre7577]

My fiancé asked me to be his girlfriend (after I told him I am traditional) within 3 months of meeting each other and hanging out face to face, and told me he loved me literally 7 days after that. No long drawn out “talking but really texting” phase, no intimacy, just long talks about who we were and who we eventually wanted to be. He proposed on our 3 year anniversary and I’m so excited to do life with him forever ❤ My parents met, dated, and got engaged within 6 months and then married a little under a year after that. We’re all grown up and out of the house and they’re enjoying being empty nesters who go to Home Depot and watch HGTV and TikToks in the evening. My brother and sister-in-law met their freshman year of college and got engaged 2 days after graduation. The wedding was 3 months ago and it was beautiful. Love is a risk. You’ve got to be willing to lose big to win big.

[@VicandWes]

My ex boyfriend was horrible to me for 2 and a half years. I finally took off the rose-colored glasses and broke up with him. He told me two things that shattered those rose-colored glasses 1. “I don't think I’ll ever love every part of your body” (I'm physically disabled, he was also physically disabled so to me that wasn't an issue. He needed 24/7 care and help with everything from eating to taking a shower. I would help feed him and nurses would come in to shower him. We lived in a college dorm (not together but there was a common area). and 2. “I'm going to make you change your mind” in regards to me wanting to wait until marriage. When I broke up with him he said “I’ve realized something, men want options” and he also told me “we should do what my parents did and wait seven years before getting engaged, because that's how long it takes to get to know someone” Also found out after we broke up that he was cheating on me and said “oh good now I can tell you”

[@adk5997]

He sounded like cheater anyway

[@pocahontas-je2ip]

well, at least he was being honest with you, giving you the hint and you should take it. Would you wanna be with him too if he had no arms and legs and couldn't work? Pretty sure the man has his own right to question his future

[@adk5997]

@@pocahontas-je2ip he is a loser for he should have been clear he didn’t want her from the get go. I can’t believe you giving him excuses. 2 years!!! what was he there for? Definitely had benefits. Time waster

[@VicandWes]

@@pocahontas-je2ip I forgot to put in my original comment he was also physically disabled so to me that wasn't an issue. He needed 24/7 care and help with everything from eating to taking a shower. I would help feed him and nurses would come in to shower him. We lived in a college dorm (not together but there was a common area)

[@JohnAnderson-ev3lp]

​@@VicandWes how did he cheat if he was that disabled.

[@cameronmanochi7289]

I was in the process of hiring a candidate for the company I work at. On the ride along the candidate told me he was in a “situationship” and loved that he could leave at any point. I quickly told HR that we shouldn’t hire him because of his character. Not committing to someone while living and sleeping in the same bed is a character issue. A person that can’t commit is conceited and focused on themselves.

[@GabrielleTollerson]

I always hated hookup culture and 'situationships' ,they're so gross,weird,and dehumanizing. Dating was hard because men I tried to date thought I was "boring" for not wanting to participate and wanted something meaningful

[@pocahontas-je2ip]

usually girls that say this it's because they couldn't lock the "Chad"

[@creamdelacreme]

Can we take a second to acknowledge Brett not caring that Chappel Roan supposedly hates her and yet Brett continues to listen to and enjoy her music? That is the true definition of girls supporting girls. Still supports her craft and artistic talent while leaving personal things out of it.

[@RitaJeff]

Your editing are on point, appreciated it!

[@hannahgf4883]

Bot

[@msan-ux2re]

Situationships are the worst type of relationships. Don’t do it. If they are not interested in being in serious relationships and your want a stable and commited relationship, walk away immediatly. You are just hurting yourself. Been there, done that. Went from saying “there is nobody to date” to being engadged a year later, there were chances for situationship but I immedietly ended them and went with a guy who loves me and want and share values and lifestyle and dreams.

[@szechuon6971]

This video summed up in two pieces of advice: 1. Ladies - high standards for the RIGHT qualities-mainly keep sex off of the table, make it clear you are dating o get married. Don’t agree to love with him. Gents - be intentional. Date to get married.

[@alenaadamkova7617]

Psdychologist and researchers found out the first 12 most important values for great marriage/partnership has nothing to do with "love emotions" its like the first 12 most important values preferences have to do with loyalty, personal values etc.

[@robertclark5874]

Better advice... Listen to God and obey

[@mysteryheart53]

What if a lady screwed up badly in the past? What can she do?

[@wackpendejo3000]

@@mysteryheart53 find a guy that also screwed up badly in the past? or somebody who can look past that.

[@GassedFEIN]

@@mysteryheart53don’t worry abt the past, the past isn’t who we are, can’t move backwards gotta go forward.

[@IsMe-Abby]

My fiancé and I got together junior year high school. We both fell in love and decided this was it, I want to marry this person, at the same time after 2 months during winter. 3 months in we began seriously discussing topics such as marriage, children, college, career paths, values, religion, all of it! I found out he bought a ring our senior year and held onto it until we had done some growth and saved money. Now, we got our first place together, we’re going to college together, and our wedding is spring 2025. We both wanted to date for marriage, not for fun. 5 years together and I couldn’t be happier.

[@blackswan7568]

2:20 Brett having Vietnam war flashbacks😂

[@Mrs._Nunez]

My husband told me he wanted to marry me before we started actually dating. We had met a few months prior and were becoming friends but we knew we really liked each other and since all of our most important values aligned we were naturally drawn to each other. One day, kind of joking kind of serious, I asked him: “what are we doing? Is this foolishness?” He simply looked me in the eye and told me: “I’m not being foolish, I’m extremely serious. I want to merry you and spend the rest of my life with you.” He never got down on one knee, but that moment right there was more than enough. He kept his word and married me almost 10 months after that evening, and for seven years now he has been proving me that he chose me. Some people thought we were rushing things but since we were Christians and sex before marriage was absolutely out of the equation, all the time that we had was spent growing our faith together and discussing the kind of life we wanted to create for ourselves and our future family. We knew better because we were building strong foundations no matter how fast it might looked to people, and I would do it just like that all over again.

[@quasarsavage]

As a kid who loved to wear shorts come on guys sometimes you need to put the suit and smile on and bear it. Just like outdoor venues w/o AC. It sucks but you need to be there so deal w it 😂

[@RvnClw-e8d]

My husband and I were so far from casual😂 We hung out for the first time & we became official 1 week later. We were married about a year and a month after that first time hanging out. I was always cautious when going into relationships but with him I automatically felt safe and I automatically knew this was it. We just celebrated three years married and are pregnant with our second son. Praise God. This man is most precious blessing to me and I truly look at him every day like he hung the moon with how own hands. I love him more and more every second. What an amazing man.

[@OpEditorial]

Hot take: There's no such thing as a "situationship" it's just a rebranding of casual sex.

[@PrimalInstinct0704]

Adultery has been illegal forever, yet nobody is ever charged with it. At least that I've heard of.

[@LordParticle]

Nah that's the based take

[@Cationna]

I mean, technically is most modern "relationships", but you're certainly not wrong.

[@nightbunmorotofu1176]

I think it’s normal for many people to be in this in between phase for a couple weeks to a month of “what are we”. When situationships become close to adultery is when you don’t want that clarification, but rather a more friends with benefits lifestyle

[@curlygirl56129]

I don’t like situationships but they are absolutely not adultery

[@plumisland1070]

This is my favorite video Brett has ever put out. "Don't keep it casual"; I have to remember this. At least demand the commitment of friendship.

[@chasewilliams5315]

Brett have you thought about doing a episode on first dates? I feel like that's a topic nobody ever talks about in true value. As in ins and out. Love your content. Keep it coming.

[@peterharrell7305]

When you ask a girl for a date and she doesn't respond with "you'll have to talk to my father first." It's a waste of time.

[@RobertTaylor-gz2fu]

Yes, I'd like to know how to get action on a first date.

[@RobertTaylor-gz2fu]

@@peterharrell7305 You prefer to ask her father for his permission to date her? You'd like it if he interrogated you about your suitability?

[@reanschwarzer2187]

@@RobertTaylor-gz2fuyeah actually means she had a dad helps vet a lot of flags immediately these days 😂😂

[@peterharrell7305]

@RobertTaylor-gz2fu Yes. Broken homes breed broken people. Broken people create more broken homes. You should break the cycle.

[@jonl2938]

During our second date my wife said she would never date for more than 2 years, if you don’t know by then if you want to get married she was moving on. Made sense to 21 year old me (she was 22). 3.5 months later we were engaged, 6 months after that we were married (while I still had a year left to finish my finance degree) and another 20 years and change later we‘ve had 5 amazing kids, we hang out together like best friends, run marathons together and generally seem to like each other. If some people want to casual date they can go nuts, but it was not ever for me.

[@SaltyTribeCo]

Causal things before we got married : Was never my husbands girlfriend : hung out for 2 weeks, he asked me to marry him, I said yes, married 3.5 months later and that was over TWENTY YEARS AGO! Woot! Happily married, had six children and he was such a great risk lol. We love each other and everyone thought we were crazy.

[@nexuslite]

Congratulations, that is amazing. You must have made him very happy. Unfortunately, now women have 6 children when you meet them...

[@joress]

2 WEEKS?! This I’m glad it worked out for you but that’s a VERY little amount of time.

[@IveyandFreddyVelez]

I had so many horrible relationships because I was insecure and didn’t love myself and because of this I only attracted men you used me, cheated on me, didn’t care for me, and literally wasted my time. I was always anxious and sick and worried and stressed because of the stuff I allowed others to do to me. Once I stopped looking for someone so desperately and looking inward to improve myself THATS when I met my now husband. On the first date I KNEW he was the one and he even told me on the first date you will be my wife. 5 years later we are married and I am happy I never settled and held on to those guys who clearly not for me. My husband is everything I want and more. He absolutely loves me and always looks to be with me any chance he gets. He CHOOSES to be with me I don’t have to beg or ask him to hang out with me or cook or clean. I treat him like a king and will never stop doing so. I thank God everyday for waking me up for the darkness I was in and blessing me with everything he has blessed me with. ❤

[@JenniferE-sy1rs]

I was 22 and in a ‘let’s keep it casual’ phase when I met a guy…and got pregnant. 7 years later that guy and I are happily married with 3 kids and another on the way 😂

[@maryrap246]

In first relationship, I agreed to keep things “casual” because I liked him so much and didn’t want to lose him. I really had no idea what it meant, and knew it was a mistake immediately. Nearly 3 years later, I’m still dealing with the emotional fallout and feeling that I betrayed myself. I recently started dating someone who I really liked and after the third date, he said he was too busy for a girlfriend and offered a casual relationship. I recognized that as much as I liked this person, a casual relationship would never be fulfilling for me. I’m sure it works out in some situations but don’t accept less than you deserve if you know you want more.

[@robertvail573]

Problem is everyone is waiting for a better option. Yes i like you but maybe a better looking richer guy will come along so i do not want to commit to you sorry. This is very sad it is great to fall in love and stay in love no matter who comes along. When you build a strong relationship with someone it can not compare to the next guy to come along and has more money. The grass is not always greener on the other side. I just want to find a normal person who is ready for a real relationship based on love respect trust honesty faithfulness great communication. But I guess that is not out there anymore it is just $$$$$. Sad to say

[@mtngrl5859]

If you want a traditional marriage, its best to be a more traditional person & by that I mean going to church. Every young man I suggested it to & who went to the right church ( large enough to have singles activities group) has found a wife. Stay offline & out of clubs.

[@ArielGonzalez1]

​@@mtngrl5859You mean the mansion for born again virgins??? Men might aswell just marry prostitutes, at least they are somewhat more sincere

[@joress]

⁠@@mtngrl5859I don’t want a traditional marriage. I’m not opposed to abstaining until marriage, but I was not raised Christian so in order to have a “traditional marriage” I’ll have to change mi belief system and frankly I don’t think I’m capable of doing that. I can learn to cook, I can clean and I don’t expect my future wife to do it for me. Of course if she does it is going to be well recieved, but I won’t expect it. I just want to find a girl, settle with her, marry her, have children and live the rest of our lives together. It blows my mind that “traditionalists” think that the only way to achieve that is being religious.

[@justagirl070707]

As a millennial who has been dating for 18 years… I had such high standards and preferences in my twenties, no chill, which honestly saved me, but, It also hindered me from some amazing men. Then when I learned in my 30s I needed to be open, but then came these weird situationships, I had to learn a balance of being open and not tolerating time wasters or disrespect. Now I’m in the best relationship of my life and we are planning our future and our wedding!

[@asdisskagen6487]

Young people should see dating as what it actually is: a job interview for a life partner.

[@therearenoshortcuts9868]

"life partner" might be putting much pressure on people how about just: parents for your children who can stick around long enough to make them decent humans

[@Ranger_2016]

So true! I was 15 and my husband was 17 when we started dating. Now 14 years later we will be celebrating our 9 year wedding anniversary next week. We were each others first and only relationship and I cherish that so deeply.

[@rockzalt]

In other generations, there have been traditional young Catholics who have decided to marry and it took seven years for them to do so. Great motivator to save up money while living with the parents.

[@surreal_hearts]

As someone who's been in a situationship, I will say that it is one of the most stressful things ever. You're not committed but you're not exactly "friendly" either - so it's a mess

[@Gman-mw5jq]

Here’s an answer to the problem. Hi, I’m Gavin. I’m a 19 year old man, college student in Western New York who is dedicated himself to be a traditional high school math teacher. I’m 5’9”, I go to the gym, inconsistently, but I try to go at most five days a week and I care about my health. I work four days a week to pay for my bills and help provide for my family the best I can. Here’s a few interesting facts about me: I am a dean’s list college student, graduated with a 4.0 in high school, I have a younger brother that if anyone met him you’d find him absolutely adorable, and the craziest fact that I have is I used to be a hardcore leftist but now I come to accept that the only way our country can succeed is with conservativism and unity. My goals in life after college are to own a home and raise a family with a loving wife that I can help provide for and relieve some of the struggles it takes to be a mother. Basically I am your average guy seeking the American dream. Oh I also like Marvel (not modern marvel) I play guitar from time to time, I like walking at my local park and so much more. There. Just put myself out there. Hopefully I can meet someone here that can be a good friend or perhaps something more.

[@kamikamiteehee]

that sounds precious. never change.

[@Gman-mw5jq]

@@kamikamiteehee I won’t. It’s hard to lose hope with the world we live in right now but I will fight fight fight. God bless you.

[@gothic_oma]

Good luck, young man! I love that you're "putting yourself out there". 😊

[@ArielGonzalez1]

Nah bro, you ain't a 6 foot+ millionaire chad.... You are cooked

[@Maiseymax696]

Yo I live in Western New York! But I am 9 years older than you haha, unfortunate

[@reneeg9406]

My parents were dating for< 3 months when my mom asked Dad's mom " how do I get him to marry me" and my grandmother's reply was "whatever you do don't mention marriage" < 6 months later they were on their way to the GOP to elope, and on the car ride there and my dad said to my mom "by the way I never did ask you, will you marry me?" That was in 1970. They are still happily together

[@nexuslite]

Good woman. Women start pushing for marriage at about 3 months in my experience. That is for a man to bring up, not a woman.

[@Itslauraokay]

I can tell you as a woman who just turned 23 I am sick and I mean sick of the unseriousness and carelessness of men I will NOT settle for a man who can’t hold a conversation, can’t plan a date, is “going with the flow” or has 5000 ig models in his following. I’ve also had bad experiences in relationships so at this point I’m so discouraged and so tired.

[@pocahontas-je2ip]

good luck hitting the wall soon then

[@xandercruz900]

swear some of you think your over-inflated egos and "standards" are you sounding "virtuous". It seems like most of you Zoomers talk too d@mn much about the other person and refuse to see that maybe YOU are the problem since that is all you can attract.

[@VanityDivined]

Gen Z isn’t “afraid” of commitment. They simply can’t get it from someone or can’t get the person they want, and have situationships to stay in denial.

[@WORKOUTSOLUTIONS]

GOD BE WITH US AGAINST EVIL AND TEMPTATIONS ✝🙏⛪❤👩‍❤️‍👨💍🕊

[@randomperson1943]

I am a Xennial. I was with someone for 18 years. We called each other husband and wife and wore rings. We never got married. He convinced me I didn't need real marriage since we lived as a married couple. We never had kids cuz he didn't want any since he already had a son. I raised him since birth mom passed. Well, my ex cheated on me and left last year. My life was so intertwined with him that i didn't know what to do at age 37. Thankfully God placed the most amazing man in my life. We went ring shopping on the third date. I moved in 2 months into dating. Officially engaged at 7 months (he waited to plan something special plus moving was insane just before the holidays). And we get married in 2 weeks. This is the best relationship I've ever had. Why? Because it's centered in Christ. Annnnd, we knew this was it for us and he was serious and didn't wanna waste any time. I'm so happy and in love. Thankful to God for him. ❤

[@reanschwarzer2187]

Until you get a large contingent of women vocally asking men to come back this won’t change and sorry most gen z girls went through the hook up phase they can’t pair bond. They constantly compare from previous partners and that’s why divorce is mostly initiated by women and it’s so common.

[@AlekseyMaksimovichPeshkov]

Except it's both sexes in Gen Z that are having less sex than ever, not just the guys.

[@reanschwarzer2187]

@@AlekseyMaksimovichPeshkov sure but like it or not you do have the perception is reality. I mean it’s good to point out trends like this but there’s not exactly a lot of women going yay we like men please comeback. We can go back to not screaming at you if you approach us. Look like it or not it’s been a solid 2 decades of this men have gotten the experience many have the numbers you got things like mgtow and the red pill that came up. This is an oil tanker that some women want to turn back on a dime. That’s not going to happen you’ll need at least a decade of putting men in a positive light to shift this back to how it used to be.

[@peterharrell7305]

Do you also believe women when they say their body count is 3 at 27 years old? Lmao

[@Lawrence_Talbot]

Bingo. Men did not ask for this. It was women who labeled men sexist and toxic. It was women who said it should be “fine” if a woman sleeps around and has many, many partners. It was women who said being a gentleman was code for “misogyny” and nice is code for “a creep”. Until women get their heads out of theirasses it’s a lost cause for men.

[@RobertTaylor-gz2fu]

The love riding the c-carousel of Chads.

[@bm5_5_5]

I’m so horrified seeing how this has become normalised over the years. I’m someone with an anxious avoidant attachment style. I’ve been scared of commitment for as long as I can remember but at the same time I really want someone to share my life with and crave physical closeness. I used to think that was me being codependent but turns out that was just my fears running the show. This type of behaviour should not be normalised as mine came from a traumatic and stressful childhood. I lived in situationships during my 20s because it kept me safe not having to go all in but it’s a false sense of safety. I was so trapped in my own narrow thinking and I didn’t even realise it. I’m doing everything I can now to change my ways and open my heart to life and people through therapy and educating myself on attachment. This is a very fearful generation we’re in now but true love does not come without risk or fear. It’s just the way it is but the rewards can be huge for our physical and mental well being. I finally have hope that things will turn around now and I can feel myself getting more secure. I’m a millennial btw (1994).

[@maeengegrea]

there is a reason you see little kids 'getting married' and not being in a 'casual relationship.' In kindergarten I got married to a kid and when he held hands with another girl we got divorced because even 4-year-olds understand that relationships mean barriers and they mean being loyal to your partner. I think somewhere around the time when social media gets introduced people forget all this.

[@Mnloopz]

I was in a situationship for 2 and half years with a girl that always talked about her ex. Every time I seemed to be moving on to someone she suddenly texted me a bunch and showed interested. For all the young men out here do not waste your time. If the other person does not want to commit, run for the hills because I missed out what could have been real relationships with other amazing women. Stay blessed.

[@gigib.7956]

I tried it once, Never again! It's not for me.

[@0114davis]

I met my husband one night in my junior year of high school when he was in town visiting his mom. I did not speak to him for a year. He came back got my number through a friend and that was it. He just felt like home. We went out that night, said I love you a few weeks later, and discussed marriage not long after that. We were married in less than a year at 18 and 21. 26 years and 3 adult kids later I would not change a thing. When you know you know.

[@reneeg9406]

No matter what people believe as far as their sexuality/comment level is concerned.... jealousy is a very real, natural, emotion. As is the desire to be your partners " ONLY". Even if you say that you are fine with the idea of them seeing someone else, it doesn't change what you feel within yourself. At the end of the day it is heartbreak/"not good enough"waiting to happen Speaking as someone who went through a couple "it's casual" phases... And was either burnt, or felt the guilt of burning someone, every time 😔

[@maddiefanzieglerfan6214]

Or some really don't want to invest, want casual and feel relived when their partner goes elsewhere as well because they wouldn't be expecting them to invest.Casual itself males not exclusive and some want it that way

[@LadyDecember]

I've been saying this for a while, glad someone else did too. This current mindset of trying to paint jealousy with the broadest brush and say it's always a completely toxic emotion you shouldn't feel is all kinds of wrong. Yes, jealousy can get to the point of being restrictive and controlling, that is a bad level, but you're allowed to have a healthy, normal amount of jealousy. It's a completely natural thing to feel. To be told you must suppress all of it or else get lectured on what a prudish, unenlightened person you are is ridiculous, and I swear the sentiment usually comes from chronically online people who don't live in the real world.

[@theprodigalson4003]

Kept doing it tho

[@JohnAnderson-ev3lp]

Some people it's not natural and are built for stability

[@marlonmoncrieffe0728]

Yeah, I am as sexually naive as it comes and even I know that jealousy and longing comes about even if not initially or expected.

[@sphenopalatineganglioneuralgia]

Makes me want to get on the social medias just to keep this going. My wife and I met, went on a few dates over a month, and she made such an impact on me that I waited for her while she did a study abroad in Europe and we resumed dating and were married a year later. Ten years later, still the best decision I ever made.

[@worgle123]

As Gen Z I hate Gen Z.