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@trinaq4 жыл бұрын
Please tackle "The Bad Boy", and why "Good Girls" are almost always irresistibly attracted to them!
@miamckenzie68614 жыл бұрын
Please cover Anne With An E!
@sickboy71044 жыл бұрын
Colossal was one of the most chilling movies I’d seen in a while because of it's subversion of this trope, and it made me look inside and question my own morality.
@proudstrangelingstudios53454 жыл бұрын
I love u guys let me say that first I’ve been with u since u were screen prism... however I sense some gender bias in this video ... so the nice guy is a fake phony predator but the nice girl is a victim of circumstance? Now while I really don’t connect with this stuff because all these tropes are woefully culturally bias and I’m black (Ducky wouldn’t have survived in my high school) and I’ve never met anyone in my life obsessed over a person that they haven’t bedded yet ... now I know if it doesn’t apply let it fly ... but U guys should really call this the “nice white guy” trope and further more with this whole thing with me too and times up People probably need to start examining how the patriarchy works culturally and Black society because I’m tired of feeling like I have to feel bad that I man but I’ve never shared in any of the privileges a white male hasBlack women run the black community so things are a little different
@babyboomer62724 жыл бұрын
Can you please make a video about Male Video Game Characters Like Geralt Of Rivia, Arthur Morgan & John Marston?
@reviewsbyjacob93504 жыл бұрын
I once heard a dating coach say something to the effect of "Nice guys think that they're better than alpha males, but actually, their view of women is just as unhealthy. They're not nice to women because it's the right thing to do, but because they view their niceness as a way of manipulating women to give them what they want. You're still viewing her as an object and not a person." Edit: 3000 likes! Thank you!
@khyati77334 жыл бұрын
Woah soo true
@reviewsbyjacob93504 жыл бұрын
@@cellardoor199991 Natural Lifestyles actually
@zitronentee4 жыл бұрын
It's not just guys. There are people, men and women, who do nice things hoping others will reciprocate/reward them.
@TheSuzieChiles4 жыл бұрын
I'd prefer to hang out with the Alpha male jerk at least he's being honest about who is. Momma always said its the "nice" ones you have to look out for.
@neosoontoretro4 жыл бұрын
@Reviews Er, not saying there is any truth to that quote. But the problem is that the dating coach entire occupation rest on the idea that certain behavior will lead to getting a relationship with a woman. So how is that not seeing her as an object to be obtain, I don't mean to be cynical but dating coach seem to defeat their entire point they're trying to make.
@taylorgayhart94974 жыл бұрын
“Thinking that if a girl doesn’t like him, she just doesn’t like being treated well...” OMG THANK YOU for putting this into words!!!! I’m so sick of this bullshit, just because your nice to a girl, it doesn’t mean she owes you anything but to be nice back!!!!!!
@oszaszi4 жыл бұрын
This is the exact reason why I am afraid to accept any kind of help from anyone. If possible I would like to have zero reliance on people. I havent had a single date where I let a guy pay me anything. Sometimes my friends even told me that I should start relying on people and I know sometimes it hurts people when you dont trust them, but there are just way too many shitty people out there.
@jensbasement38624 жыл бұрын
These jerks like to perpetuate that girls prefer to be abused because they don't want to admit the girl rejected him for his faults. They are sick in the head and think girls owe them
@btrixlestrange4 жыл бұрын
I agree! I've heard that so much, I hate that shit
@destinygarcia89934 жыл бұрын
And they get upset by the girl being nice back being then she "led him on" or whatever
@probablyryan81514 жыл бұрын
Tbh if i am nice to someone i expect the same, but ffs dont expect them to then 'like' you.
@jillnyethegirlwhosbi37724 жыл бұрын
"If I've learned anything this summer, it's that you can't force someone to love you. The best you can do is *strive* to be someone worthy of loving." - Dipper Pines, _Gravity Falls_ (2015)
@sensiblecryptid44064 жыл бұрын
I love that show
@jennadavis41354 жыл бұрын
A real man
@jennadavis41354 жыл бұрын
Brittany Bennett he was like 12 tho and at least he learned
@wildflower33964 жыл бұрын
I love dipper pines
@NowhereMan74 жыл бұрын
Isnt there a real science experiment though where if you look a person in the eyes for 4 minutes striaght and reveal some deep parts about yourself you are likely to form a loving connection with the stranger. Also if you used MDMA and stared into someones soul it could make them love you.
@syren47313 жыл бұрын
Sylvia Plath puts it elegantly: "Girls are not machines that you put kindness coins into until sex falls out"
@mrtyrant16803 жыл бұрын
No, you just have to be phisically attractive and the sex often falls out for free.
@Alexis_0053 жыл бұрын
@@mrtyrant1680 you sound bitter
@m_milos3 жыл бұрын
@@mrtyrant1680 Have you ever met a woman? It sounds like your view of women is based on what other men say.
@mrtyrant16803 жыл бұрын
@@m_milos I did, but every single time I get interested in someone, it's either: A gentle turn down. (The only result I get by making my intentions clear from the start.) A unwanted friendship. (The result of taking a more passive-aggressive approach since the direct never works out.) Or simply getting passed over in favor of a better looking guy. (Three years doing humiliating, exhausting and costly things for her, only for her to go for a tall and handsome guy instead.)
@m_milos3 жыл бұрын
@@mrtyrant1680 But what makes you think you're deserving of a relationship just because you want it? If you like someone and they don't like you back, that's not their fault. You don't deserve anything just because you want it, that's just being entitled. If it has happened so many times, maybe instead of thinking every girl is the same (which is very dehumanizing and misogynistic) try thinking of WHY they rejected you. If so many different people have rejected you, the problem is most likely you. You're probably not as great of a person as you think you are. I mean, how can you expect women to like you if you go around preaching how they're all the same, which, again, is dehumanizing. Women are people. They're just as complex as men. They're not animals or robots or machines. So to repeat myself once more: Just because you want something doesn't mean you deserve it.
@jessjess23brooks894 жыл бұрын
There's a big difference between "niceness" and genuine kindness. That goes for both sexes. Niceness is something that is more of a societal pressure or expectation. Kindness comes from the heart, no strings attached.
@HypocritesExposd4 жыл бұрын
Jessjess23 Brooks - thank you for saying this. I always thought of myself as being nice because I’m simply not a jerk, it’s in my nature. Now people cant even be nice without it having some creepy ulterior motive. No wonder incels exist. You’re either an asshole that gets what you want or you’re a nice guy that’s even worse than the asshole because no one knows what you want. Sometimes people just want love and to be loved. Good luck to all the single people searching for love out there because you need it.
@MLBlue304 жыл бұрын
@@HypocritesExposd being nice is the baseline for being a functional human being, it should go without saying, no one deseves a medal just for being nice.
@andreblackaller35604 жыл бұрын
Jessjess23 Brooks I was a bad bully when I was in High School, I had a friend that was a geeky little blond guy that loved cars as much as I did, we were kind of secret friends, he was bullied by the “Nice Guys” that swore I was satan in the flesh because I was a total dick to them, they were “sweet” with girls but I could see them for who they were, my friend, who we’ll call Ben tried to kill himself one summer break and this dudes told him shit like he should do it again and no one would miss him, That same day Ben and me started hanging out every day and we became super close, we ended up becoming a couple and marrying, he always tells me he knew I was kind but I was acting like a dick to fit in and be cool but I was the only person that cared about people who were bullied by “nice people”, I actually targeted the nice guys because they were the biggest dicks of them all and they made everyone think I was the bully for trying to stop them.
@HypocritesExposd4 жыл бұрын
MLBlue30 - agreed, but vilifying all nice people because a very small few may have ill intentions is not a good approach for humankind.
@houseofmatrix61744 жыл бұрын
Jessjess23 Brooks Thank you perfectly said
@anjali60504 жыл бұрын
He complains that women always choose the popular guys while he himself pursues only the popular girls 🤦🏻♀️
@catiatavares77574 жыл бұрын
Yep!!
@Lafemmefutile4 жыл бұрын
Exactly. Like those guys who moan about hot girls not dating them but also spend their time grading women looks on a scale and calling those who don’t make their cut all types of names. All the while, demanding women take them as they are ie without money, looks, charm or even manners.
@qmulus14 жыл бұрын
@@Lafemmefutile A lot of times, those guys get rejected by the nerdy girls too, because those nerdy girls ALSO want the popular guy.
@haveagoodday6294 жыл бұрын
THANK YOU!!! 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
@qmulus14 жыл бұрын
Women tend to be atrracted to men that other women want.
@swayamsiddha154 жыл бұрын
the problematic thing is, these “nice guys” are nice to you only because they expect something from you in return just because they are being ‘nice’, like romantic reciprocation from a girl.
@swayamsiddha154 жыл бұрын
Finn MacCool thats not what i meant. what i mean is, they are nice to you *only* because they want the reciprocation. once you reject them or they start to doubt you, they show their true colours. so truly, were they ever ‘nice’ to begin with?
@swayamsiddha154 жыл бұрын
Finn MacCool did you watch the video... the nice guy is always the guy who’s interested in you. thats in the definition. a ‘nice guy’ is not a male that is nice in general.
@trinaq4 жыл бұрын
Exactly, "The Dogged Nice Guy" trope has been done to death. They seem to think that by being the patient loyal best friend to the Heroine, they will eventually realise that "The One" has been there all along. But once the girl shows ANY kind of sign that she's not interested in him romantically, he usually gets clingy and nasty. So, maybe they were never REALLY nice to begin with? 🤷♀️
@bena-n4 жыл бұрын
EXACTLY
@HairMakeupSkinBody4 жыл бұрын
Finn MacCool you suck dude
@morgan145able2 жыл бұрын
1. Men not respecting women's boundaries is so prevalent in our society that some of us will suddenly feel an uptick in interest when a man actually DOES respect us saying no. Let that sink in. (And no, that's not a sign for people to start pretending to respect us saying "no" in order to get us to say yes to you) 2) Guys who suddenly start calling a girl ugly and whatnot when rejected think they're saving face (somehow), but all you've done is tell us you're a crybaby who can't take rejection like an adult, and you've revealed you were never worthy of our attention in the first place. Thanks for validating my decision to reject you!
@StrawberryCakeStudiosYT2 жыл бұрын
FACTS 😂😂😂
@countjakku5544 Жыл бұрын
Out of curiosity: Would men who call a girl ugly when rejected have had unreasonable expectations ), or taken it all too seriously? If I were to say "at least I asked", when rejected, what would it show the woman I asked out?
@brunobucciarati6835 Жыл бұрын
@@countjakku5544 what r u on about im confused
@D415h4n342 ай бұрын
@countjakku5544 you'd need to ask that woman, after you say that
@LEFT4BASS4 жыл бұрын
I think what a lot of "nice guys" miss is that no one is everyone's type. You can do everything right, and just not be her type. There's nothing wrong with her for not being attracted to you. She just isn't feeling it. No one owes you a relationship.
@silvilro4 жыл бұрын
Exactly!!!! Omg, while I was watching this video I was thinking about all this fake nice guys that were just obsessed.
@Anna-po2tl4 жыл бұрын
And they act like you can control who you are in love with, and what would be worse? being rejected or being in a relationship where the other person doesn't love you but can't reject you since you are "nice"
@sakuranovaryan92614 жыл бұрын
I always feel guilty and leave thinking something is wrong with me that I can accept love...but ur comment really made me feel better bout myself...
@Melly16yr103 жыл бұрын
Yeah this applys to both man and women. I only wish more people would understand this in the world.
@GrayWoIf3 жыл бұрын
Also don't be nice just to expect something in return. Be nice just because that's basic decency.
@SheWhoWalksWithLucifer4 жыл бұрын
"but I'm a nice guy!" *follows you around* *won't take "no" for an answer* *dictates what you do* *gets physically abusive* Yeah... real sweet of you 🙄
@golden_boundaries4 жыл бұрын
Perfectly sums up Twilight's Edward Cullen
@pIayingwithmahwii4 жыл бұрын
@@golden_boundaries She was super into him tho... or is it r*p* because he's an immortal vampire and the power dynamic is too much in his favor xD
@hadbetterdays81184 жыл бұрын
Oh sweet irony
@Feliciatanktop4 жыл бұрын
pIayingwithmahwii OP never brought up rape, so idk why you brought it up
@Andrewbait4 жыл бұрын
He said nice not considerate
@miaferrari9584 жыл бұрын
Charles Boyle (Brooklyn Nine Nine) deserves a mention too. In the first season of the show he has a crush on Rosa, but after being told "no" he simply gets over it and continues to be friends with her, no anger, no resentment. Actually, in general (Boyle respectfully getting over Rosa, Amy never being jealous of Jake's friendship with other women, Jake's honest friendships with women, Jake's reaction to Amy telling him about having been sexually harassed in the workplace, etc. etc.) Brooklyn Nine has some of the best examples of positive masculinity in television, in my opinion.
@mazengwe284 жыл бұрын
He only got over Rosa because he ended up having a love interest in Chloe from 24
@agnik10314 жыл бұрын
When I think "true nice guy" and "Brooklyn 99", I think Terry.
@kristinwhite44724 жыл бұрын
Mia Ferrari Yes we need more positive masculine characters in shows so young boys will learn how to act
@kristinwhite44724 жыл бұрын
Agnieszka Kanska YES HE IS SO SWEET
@shubhiaggarwal4294 жыл бұрын
Let's not forget Terry , who is so gentle and nurturing !
@rameji-chan7372 жыл бұрын
I'm still laughing about the fact that my ex send me "500 Days of Summer" to show me how much he loved me and how much I had hurt him by rejecting him when I had no capacity for a relationship. Like, bro, this movie is literally about how the guy really couldn't take a "no" for an answer.
@belief11112 жыл бұрын
Dodged a bullet there ....
@espeon8712 жыл бұрын
Stop that is so cringe wtf so happy hes an ex
@secretscipio2 жыл бұрын
One of the finest movies of all time. Should be made the part of school syllabus to cure the simp epidemic.
@zurinavarrete35442 жыл бұрын
@@secretscipio XD
@MylesKillis9 ай бұрын
Um summer pursued him twice. She was the one who couldn’t take no for an answer.
@cheesecakelasagna4 жыл бұрын
Golden rule, if a person is only nice to you and not to everyone else (especially to service crew, and the likes), they're not genuinely nice.
@mrtyrant16804 жыл бұрын
Of course you gonna be nice to someone you're interested in it. So what's really your point?
@lolaa59214 жыл бұрын
@Daniela Rejas García what do you mean who cares? If a guy is only nice to you and not your friends and family he isn't actually nice is he? Only nice for the end goal which is you, doesn't sound very nice does it
@lolaa59214 жыл бұрын
@Daniela Rejas García okay I was just speaking generally but its seem you dont get the original comment if somebody is only nice to you and treats everyone else like trash. Then they're not a nice person and somebody i definitely wouldn't want to be my bf. You know common respect for the people around you
@lolaa59214 жыл бұрын
@Daniela Rejas García im sorry what... you dont want someone who is a decent person and respects others?? I seriously don't get it
@EM-PRAP4 жыл бұрын
@Daniela Rejas García If someone that is mean to everyone else, and if he is trying to date you and he is only nice to you. That mean he is only being nice for the reason of having sex with you. And he will stop using the fake "nice" persona, and he will revealed his true self
@thesourpatchkidd5794 жыл бұрын
It’s simple: he’s nice not because it’s who he is but because it’s the most he can be to attract a woman since he doesn’t have the looks or the money or the suave that all the guys he envies does. Nice is just a cloak, like money. He’s actually just like every other guy- and that’s why he acts just like them. Because if he had what they had he would be just like them.
@RK-ep8qy4 жыл бұрын
Being nice is one thing, I'm all for a decent chill kind guy...if he's genuine some guys take this and pervert it. They basically groom the girl to try to match his fantasy to reality and if that fails then it's the girls fault and he's the victim.
@tjlnintendo4 жыл бұрын
Obama Doesn't Love Me No More Or the guy was an asshole to begin with. It can go both ways.
@nurmadihahbintizulkifli17344 жыл бұрын
@Obama Doesn't Love Me No More how...... can...... someone...... turn...... into...... an...... asshole..... if they're really a nice person in the first place ? good people don't just *TURN* into bad just because people *REJECT* them
@nkbujvytcygvujno60064 жыл бұрын
And “he”- those guys- usually was never nice in the first place. He was just a selfish dick who _thought_ he was being oh-so-nice to the girl he wanted to impose his fantasy on. But it was all about him, and his fantasy, not her. Not her as a person, just his projection. (Before you try to flood my comment with replies, I won’t respond to you. My comment is for anyone else who might read it, not you, hopeless case.)
@ghostrider26644 жыл бұрын
its the same game. its just a different strategy with the same goal in mind. its just a somewhat sleazier way of going about the gameplay.
@nervengewitter4 жыл бұрын
Every single woman ever has heard the sentence "I'm/he's such a *NICE GUY*, give me/him a chance!!!". This way of eroding women's boundaries and guilt tripping her into dating guys she doesn't find attractive is sickening to me. If we refuse to date these men, people will go ballistic on us and claim we'll never find a guy with our "high standards". Excuse me, I'd rather be single than settle for a guy who feels entitled to me.
@sofiabravo19944 жыл бұрын
nervengewitter Yes because women tend to have unrealistic standards regarding a guy when they are very young and if and when they do obtain what they want the guy usually is not the kind of prince charming they were expecting or realize they can’t change him...in my experience most of the really hot guys were one of the rudest people I’ve ever known/arrogant so that’s why I feel like the ones that don’t have the best looks sometimes usually do have a better hearts Because they don’t have the luxe to make up for it so they have to try they have to put more effort to get attention from a girl they find pretty or cute but then again the cycle can go back to that guy and only be attractive women that are genetically attractive but there’s a lot of guys that still go after average type of women and those average type women are trying to get at the really attractive guy that they’re not gonna give her the hour of the day and then the average girl will miss out on a really great guy... So yes basically if you’re not generally attractive you’re going to have do you use your personality more to win somebody over.
@jensbasement38624 жыл бұрын
Amen. I'm tired of people feeling sorry for these, "nice guys" who use sympathy to trap you. They also use smiles to disarm you, so you are more comfortable around them, and easier to manipulate. I'd also rather be single for the rest of my life than date someone who is a pretends to like me, and obviously reveals no authenticity, genuineness, or interest in me as a person.
@nervengewitter4 жыл бұрын
@@sofiabravo1994 good looks only make it easier in the very first stages of dating, your personality shows very quickly. This goes for both men and women. Conventionally hot women also have an easier time finding a date, but again: if you're not compatible character-wise, it doesn't help. And better looking people can be conceited and shallow, but often they're also sick of people only looking at the outside. Plain looking people on the other hand don't have "hearts of gold" just because they're not pretty. Maybe sometimes. I've also known very rude ugly people.
@Future_Pheonix4 жыл бұрын
Exactly! I've been there...
@trytoxania70204 жыл бұрын
Ok
@packnetadaija3 жыл бұрын
It’s always interesting that the “nice guys” tend to be upset about how girls don’t like them, but it’s like they go after girls who are clearly not interested in them. Like my bf made a good point, while the “nice” guy is upset over his crush not liking him, there’s another girl looking at him who is interested in him who’s upset that he doesn’t like her
@mrtyrant16803 жыл бұрын
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! That is so fucking not true.
@mrtyrant16803 жыл бұрын
@Delina Kebede Were you one those girls? If not, you're just making assumptions.
@perovrljic54093 жыл бұрын
Are that girls who like "nice guys" also "nice girls"?
@s.g.75723 жыл бұрын
@@mrtyrant1680 seen you commenting a few times to this effect. doing alright, buddy?
@thehapagirl923 жыл бұрын
I was that girl who liked the nice guy. He was mad that I relentlessly pursued him even though he wanted a woman to chase him. He wanted a nice woman who took his feelings into account but when he met me, someone who does this, he ignored me and got mad at me for liking him. And I’m too attractive for him anyways. His loss. He’ll remain single forever the way he goes about liking women. He’s 28 and never had a gf because he has some fantasy of the “perfect woman”. When an attractive, kind, attentive girl like me showed interest in dating him he panicked. He doesn’t want a gf, he wants to complain about women not liking him so people can feel sorry for him. Women like him, but he doesn’t give them a chance because they’re not “perfect” when he’s nowhere near perfect either.
@poissony4 жыл бұрын
A real nice guy would never say he's nice. He'd just, *be* nice, without drawing attention to it.
@ioanafilipescu23274 жыл бұрын
OMG WORDS
@ShaudaySmith4 жыл бұрын
Exactly.
@kaloyanpetrov78634 жыл бұрын
The truth have been spoken. The think is you would just be good to everyone and will not obsess nobody. No is No and that's it you will understand that and back off.
@mavlee57114 жыл бұрын
What if someone’s asked a “true nice guy” if he was nice. What should he say?
@mavlee57114 жыл бұрын
Also people are weird a some people take specific actions as nice or say that those are nice things to do and some people take them as offensive or cruel. If I told the truth to some deluded person they’d say I’m being mean or I’m not supporting them even though to me that’s me being nice.
@adeline.is.sleepy4 жыл бұрын
if "nice guys" were genuinely nice, they would respect when a woman doesn't reciprocate his feelings
@bobnavonvictorsteyn90174 жыл бұрын
Adeline Collins They are called kind guys
@ashcruz9044 жыл бұрын
Adeline Collins PREACH
@pokeninja244 жыл бұрын
Care to elaborate? I'm not understanding the connection between kindness and an aversion to rejection or perhaps I'm misunderstanding, so please elaborate.
@adeline.is.sleepy4 жыл бұрын
AFRO_NiNjA25 it sucks to be rejected, don’t get me wrong, but a mature adult will understand that nobody is obligated to reciprocate their feelings. you may be down in the dumps about it, sure, but any reasonable person won’t throw a hissy fit when they don’t get their way.
@pokeninja244 жыл бұрын
@@adeline.is.sleepy ok thank you! Apreciate the constructive conversation!
@_Alimm4 жыл бұрын
I was just having a convo about how the "bad boys" girls go for actually have more positive qualities than the "nice guy" They could be more confident, handsome, ambitious, funny, exciting to be around vs. the nice guy who has none of that and really isn't even just nice but performs niceness just to have a single positive quality. Good ppl don't think constantly about how good they are, they just are.
@lia_lovettt82854 жыл бұрын
"Bad guys" know what they want, and wont take bullshit, thats why they r better
@andreasmeelie18894 жыл бұрын
I agree but can you give off some movie examples? Does 10 Things I Hate About You count?
@kiaraetsuko4 жыл бұрын
Also they are more honest I think, the "nice guy" wanna be always good in front of the girl but the "bad boy" just says what he thinks and doesn't give a sh!t his opinion is unpopular or whatever.
@lia_lovettt82854 жыл бұрын
@@andreasmeelie1889 I believe we should not believe that the guys in movies are real, because they are not. You can't see movies and expect real life people to be like them, bad guys in real life, and nice guys in real life are totally different, they share some stuff, but not all. Like bad guys, you can't make them change, you just find their soft spot. And nice guys, they look nice and everything, and sometimes they are, but sometimes they are just creeps.
@Emil-lf3no4 жыл бұрын
bad boys are bad boys because they are rebels nice guys are nice guys because they represent the status quo
@gizemalarasoyleyici5813 жыл бұрын
I think How I Met Your Mother sums it up perfectly. Ted is the 'nice guy' who always pursues wrong women, doesn't take their feelings into consideration and is self-obsessed. Barney is the guy who isn't the nicest but doesn't pretend to be one either. And Marshall is the actual nice guy. He is kind, polite, caring. He doesn't point out 'he is a nice guy' every second and doesn't expect to be rewarded for it.
@jenikatorreja49362 жыл бұрын
yesss! Man I love Marshall Eriksen..
@julianbigelow27942 жыл бұрын
I agree with everything you said, except for the part where you said that Barney does not pretend to be nice, Barney absolutely pretends to be nice. He manipulates women into believing that he wants commitment when really he does not.
@goglamere2 жыл бұрын
AND Ted brags about all his exploits to his kids and in the end, proves he STILL hasn’t learned his lesson. “Hey Robin! Now that my wife is dead, wanna hook up?”
@fuckyouyoutube79212 жыл бұрын
Marshall has always been my favourite
@HasufelyArod7 ай бұрын
As much as reward would be welcome, I do my best not to expect it so obviously. It's hard, but it's worth it.
@dakotahale17884 жыл бұрын
My parents would tell me don't be a "nice guy" be a "good man."
@danielhance14674 жыл бұрын
That's a golden nugget right there
@jaimicottrill28314 жыл бұрын
Dakota Hale you’re parents are wise!
@exspensivehousescom4 жыл бұрын
Yeah but was is a good man.?
@sregan54154 жыл бұрын
word
@tagaway61734 жыл бұрын
@LEO2001 ehhh... is not. But if it is to you, is fine.
@Darkmaiki4 жыл бұрын
Sharing my personal experience. I was during many years a typical nice guy. It was genuine, but as years passed, and I was getting no girls, I started to get resentful "to the womanhood" because they liked the "bad boys". It took time until I realized that it was not about being nice or bad, but about having and showing personality. I'm still "a nice guy" but now in a healthy way, it doesn't mean I'm entitled to any girl. And in the last year's I was very successful with the girls, until I found the one Im going to marry. What I want is to try to explain to any potential young me out there is that being nice is not an entitlement to get a girl. Show confidence, have a personality, take care of yourself, be brave and tell what you feel if you really like a girl, and move on if she is not in the same page. Do not pretend to be friend of a girl with a hidden agenda. THAT IS NOT NICE.
@arkaix4 жыл бұрын
Let a random stranger like me say to you: thank you for your words. May you live a happy life 🌟
@kikiholland36954 жыл бұрын
Feel you; I used to be a "pick me"; had to go through some growth to realize that other women weren't the enemy.
@Darkmaiki4 жыл бұрын
@Nicholas Hansen I was more in shape in my teenage years than nowadays. That was not the issue
@Zzzk234 жыл бұрын
We love self improvement
@blaze5569224 жыл бұрын
I agree but don't feel these guys look at it as pretending. They really do want to be close with who they like. They settle for whatever title puts them closer to the person they desire. A girl can say friend but he won't think of himself that way. That is part of the problem for sure. Glad you grew up but don't get married. It's a trap... You can spend the rest of your life with someone without gov't approval lol
@GeneralTantzu4 жыл бұрын
So "I'm a nice guy" and "I'm not like the other girls" are basically two sides of the same toxic coin? Makes sense.
@alya8054 жыл бұрын
Certainly
@neosoontoretro4 жыл бұрын
@Dr Frankenthot Honestly, I have more sympathy for "not like other girls" and "nice guys" than for the people who complain about them The animosity against "not like other girls" has gotten very sexist at this point, to the point where girls and women are vilified for simply wanting to be different. And the "nice guy" backlash has chauvinistic undertones in which "nice guys" is used as catch all term for men who are not stereotypically masculine. So yeah, there is a lot of toxicity surrounding these terms, but that toxicity doesn't just go one way.
@leventetakacs16414 жыл бұрын
@@neosoontoretro that's actually a very good point. Like what if you have a bunch of girls who are all very horrible people and there is one nice girl, in that particular social sense "not like other girls" makes sense. And yes, not all sensitive guys are also entitled narcissists either. of course, in a wider social sense none of these two "tropes" make sense so it's ridiculous to identify by them, but that's another thing
@nadiao85454 жыл бұрын
@@neosoontoretro thank you. people are more focused on how "not like other girls" is misogynist than on the misogyny that might lead girls to want to be different.
@BadReligi0nFan694 жыл бұрын
@@neosoontoretro Totally get you, I admit, when I was like 13 I had that 'nice guy' mentality. But I matured. And while I'd say its still my personality, not to sound "I'm such a great person' but I am genuinely pretty reserved, I like to help people, and I'm kinda cheesy. But I do think what you said rings really true. Ironically, when guys aren't super buffed out or over the top 'alpha' they're just called "oh they're 'nice guys''. When that's not really the case. And same with girls who are 'quirky', its very possibly that they don't hate other women, they just don't like traditionally activities oftentimes associated with girls, so what. I do think some of course could kinda ride that trope into the sunset but plenty of girls just like not traditionally feminine things. It seems though, one one defense of "nice guys" is that I feel its overused and thrown around as a catch all term for guys who are genuinely nice but don't 'have six pack abs', and if guys have general wondering of "why can't I get a girl", they're just shit on and said that they're toxic.
@CaraMarie133 жыл бұрын
I remember when i was in high school i had to avoid my "nice guy" who kept on aggressively pursuing me. And worst, how everyone kept telling me to go for him. Am not very physically attractive (no low self-esteem btw) so i knew that what people were telling me was that he was the best i could hope for. It was so upsetting that people dismissed my concerns for his disgusting behavior even though they always talked about how creepy he always acted around me.
@animelovergirl84612 жыл бұрын
They probably watched too much Hollywood movies portraying this "nice guy" trope.
@kbhprinsesse Жыл бұрын
I feel ya, My mother once told me to take what I could get (when talking about a guy I knew who didn't treat me very good) because someone like me couldn't hope for much. Thanks, mum!
@Jasmine2151005 ай бұрын
@@kbhprinsesse You yourself, you know when you're in love or not!
@strawberryart38864 жыл бұрын
I love ‘YOU’cause it shows the real side to all the things on screen that were played as romantic. As someone who was in highschool during the Twilight era, all these ‘watch you while you sleep’ things were framed as romantic or even desirable. I’m glad theyre showing the true scarier side of these actions
@double0hsnap5384 жыл бұрын
One of my friends told me to watch "You" and said it was so romantic how the guy will go to any length for someone. I couldn't get past the first episode lol that's not romantic and I don't want to see how it ends... I KNOW how it ends to a well enough degree and that's not entertainment imo.
@narutotrickzxtv3D4 жыл бұрын
That's not really fair considering all the people that joe killed prior to actually even killing beck were very toxic to her life he felt he was doing her a service, beck was being manipulated and stalked way before joe even came into the picture was his brand of "love" extreme yes but did she in fact inadvertently need saving yes.
@birbwho4 жыл бұрын
Hmm not a fair comparison in my opinion since sure, edward watching bella sleep is creepy but that doesn’t mean he himself is creepy, also the fact he hasnt been human for 100 years kinda pushes him form a normal person’s perspective. I think Stephanie wrote that to remind the reader that despite all his human qualities, he’s still a predator
@eagann924 жыл бұрын
@@Mini-Toast_ the main character of You isn't a 'nice guy'. he's just a psychopath.
@bluecollarmenproductions4 жыл бұрын
Narutotrickzxtv 3D are you insane?
@jaycievictory84614 жыл бұрын
"He even expects a prize for acting like a decent human being" - looking at you, LEONARD. I still hate that Penny ended up with him on Big Bang Theory. And after it's revealed he cheated on her!
@raspberrycrowns94944 жыл бұрын
Penny and Sheldon had more chemistry than them tbh
@jaycievictory84614 жыл бұрын
@@raspberrycrowns9494 Way more!
@VardaonArda4 жыл бұрын
Yeah I hate Leonard! Penny deserved someone better.
@amityislandchum4 жыл бұрын
The whole show was just made to be fantasy fulfillment for bitter "nice guys." Hence why Penny, the hot, popular girl from high school, is working a shitty job and completely fails at her dreams, while dating a cycle of exaggerated idiots and jerks. It's only after she chooses to date/marry Leonard that she gets a good job -- in fact, one that makes even more money than his! Wow, didn't that work out so well for poor little Leonard, waiting in the wings? And of course, he is even rewarded with her abandoning her childfree status and getting pregnant in the finale! And let's not even talk about Bernadette, who is more accomplished, higher paid, and out of the league of her creepy husband, Howard, yet still takes the place of his mother by doing ALL the cleaning and cooking while he plays video games. Oh, and of course, she also abandons her desire to remain childfree for his sake. Yeah, Chuck Lorre shows are literal cancer.
@blaze5569224 жыл бұрын
I agree. A woman like her shouldn't ever have even dated him. The fact they were together in real life, bothers me a bit lol
@rhondahoward80254 жыл бұрын
If you understand nothing else about the "nice guy", understand this: It is NEVER about the girl. It's about him and what he WANTS from the girl. So everything he does is for his own personal gain. His motives are entirely selfish.
@nagichampa98664 жыл бұрын
And he seems to kill cause he likes it...or at least doesn't mind doing it!
@mumblerapkilla54064 жыл бұрын
@Manophere. com JAMES BOND EXPOSED
@Melodyofthesea784 жыл бұрын
@Manophere. com I like James Bond.
@silverhetch33834 жыл бұрын
All human motives are selfish in the end...
@Melodyofthesea784 жыл бұрын
@@silverhetch3383 And it doesn't matter if you are male or female either.
@joyre16794 жыл бұрын
"I said I'm a nice guy bit**" a huge proportion of the men who say they're nice I've seen are actually incredibly rude and misogynistic. A lot of the guys who get described as mean are actually incredibly genuine. The thing that bothers me is, why do you expect a relationship out of someone just because you help them? Shouldn't you help people just because you're nice? But nooo if he does something for you he expects more than friendship. Thank you for perfectly describing it. I've improved so much from the person I was as a teenager, most of the issues I had came from the fact I lived in a society that expected a certain ancient image of women that I wanted to go against. But I've grown a lot when I got to college. Your videos have been a huge comfort in the past few weeks. THANK YOU
@jordanwagers99104 жыл бұрын
They missed a big one in Will Smith's Megamind. When the "nice guy" suddenly gets superpowers he starts using them to force himself on a coworker and after she turns him down, he immediately becomes an even worse villain than the title character.
@luisdaniel95424 жыл бұрын
What do you mean will smith?
@mewexum75544 жыл бұрын
@@luisdaniel9542 I think they meant Will Ferrell
@TheSuperNats4 жыл бұрын
James Exum 😂😂😂
@ivag.53984 жыл бұрын
Oh yeah I remember him. Megamind is kind of a masterpiece, love that movie.
@breadfan_854 жыл бұрын
Also, The Purge season 2.
@jayquillberry49724 жыл бұрын
So it's the "I'm not like other guys" trope. Just as annoying as the "I'm not like other girls".
@andreaisabelgarcia4624 жыл бұрын
Yes! I can't stand this type of characters, they think that everything creepy that they do, makes them special and unique... Like standing outside of any place waiting to the girl that they have a Crush on
@Michael-xi9nb4 жыл бұрын
Or the self-confessed guy’s girl. She loves to drink beer, hang out with the guys and doesn’t get women!
@valenfr014 жыл бұрын
i would say the nice guy is even more harmful given how far they can take their acts. but yeah, both annoying
@violetraven83234 жыл бұрын
I’m not off the hook either, I had this phase in middle school. As I got into feminism I realized how my behavior poorly reflected the society I want AND the ideals I claimed to represent. So I put the breaks on my misandry and sexism, and began to try be the image of a feminist I want to see more in the world. My opinion of course.
@MsAbixxx4 жыл бұрын
Jayquill Berry I also went through a brief “I’m not like other girls” phase in school... it wasn’t pretty. I was all “Yeah, I play video games and my favourite colour is black. I don’t like pink or wearing makeup or skirts like those other girls do! You can have an ‘intelligent’ conversation with me.” I cringe so hard whenever I remember. When most of us try to ‘be like the boys’ we stupidly think it means we have to belittle other women, as if those other women were lesser than us or competition for guys attention. Luckily, I woke up from that pretty quickly and realised that yes I like both skirts and video games... almost as if human beings are multifaceted and can enjoy a variety of different things. And that’s what makes us unique.
@Pandulse1234 жыл бұрын
"he's not exactly looking for an awkward girl of the same social hierarchy" THIS THANK YOU. Nice dudes swear that girls, for example, don't like nerds. Yes they do! But you want a Victoria Secret model who isn't into nerdy shit.
@ManiaMac16134 жыл бұрын
'Nice guys' don't pursue their female equivalents because they see all the negative qualities in them that they can't see in themselves.
@mrtyrant16804 жыл бұрын
Should a guy date a girl that he doesn't like just because she's in the "same social hierarchy"?
@leis74544 жыл бұрын
@@mrtyrant1680 should a girl date a "nice guy" who might be even BELOW her league just because he fakes kindness
@astridediva4 жыл бұрын
Leilane Herondale hmm hmm 😂😂 yooo
@mrtyrant16804 жыл бұрын
@@leis7454 That's not what I said. When I was 16 some people tried to put me together with a girl in my class just because we kinda fitted together. (Appearance wise.) But I was interested in another who was more attractive then myself but we had a lot of things in common and enjoyed the same type of stuff. (She was a hard core gamer just like me. )
@47Cartoonguy3 жыл бұрын
I had a "Nice guy" phase in high school/college i was completely spiteful towards girls who didn't give me a chance and thought they just wanted the "jocks" or "thugs" im not proud of who i was then but i grown up and learn how toxic i was and now focusing on gaining confidence and losing weight
@duygukaya88193 жыл бұрын
proud of u bro
@47Cartoonguy3 жыл бұрын
@@duygukaya8819 Thank you
@proudcynophile19013 жыл бұрын
You are so honest. You'll find your soul mate!
@dougpatterson74943 жыл бұрын
@@proudcynophile1901 it's really nice to see so much positivity in the comments on this video.
@biggie395 Жыл бұрын
I Hope that you’re doing better these days it takes a lot to realize when we are doing something wrong or when we are being toxic
@charleygriffiths4 жыл бұрын
A nice guy shouldn’t have to tell girls that they’re “nice”, just prove it by your actions.
@Downtown814 жыл бұрын
Charley Griffiths as my dad always said “if you have to say it, it’s probably not true”
@charleygriffiths4 жыл бұрын
R Parker fair point! Think it’s more that if they’re a genuinely nice person, they will do nice things without even thinking, rather than faking nice things for an ulterior motive
@theonejokeking31914 жыл бұрын
Anytime someone offers up random, unsolicited information like “I’m a nice person” or “I’m very honest” I automatically suspect them of being the opposite. I have no idea why else they would feel the need to point those things out unless they were trying to cover something up that is a big enough problem to be on their mind frequently enough that they just random ass start talking about it.
@eloasain45204 жыл бұрын
@Riki Kage If your response to someone saying that nice people don't have to go around saying they're nice because if they are truly nice it will show in their actions is to pull a half-assed whatabouttism then it just sort of marks you as a "nice guy" even if you're not one. No one is saying that women can't be scum but read the room dude, if the topic of the video is the "Nice Guy" trope in the media of course people will talk about "Nice Guys" and not focus on the topic of gold diggers which is something that has nothing to do with the video.
@eloasain45204 жыл бұрын
@Riki Kage While some incels are nice guys not all nice guys are incels so while that equivalency is not wrong it's also not a concrete fact. Also what does that even has to do with either of ours previous comments? Because it does not add anything to the conversation besides a vague confusion over your definition of context and maybe a bit of misdirection
@EllenDaybow4 жыл бұрын
Sierra Burgess is the "nice guy" of female characters
@crapshots4 жыл бұрын
I just watched this yesterday and YES. I felt so bad for Jamey the whole time. ... I kinda feel weird about it but I couldn't help shipping Sierra and Veronica. Sure they were partners in crime (catfishing) but once they have learned their lesson, I kinda feel like there's some potential for an interesting romantic dynamic there. But maybe that's just me! 😂
@sonalsanjanwala72114 жыл бұрын
crapshots SAME, I was shipping Sierra w Veronica too
@Visplight4 жыл бұрын
@@sonalsanjanwala7211 They at least seemed equally toxic.
@jillianakinyi99524 жыл бұрын
The "good woman " 😂
@S_T_fania4 жыл бұрын
No she is a "nice girl" there is already a name for this type of women 👍
@joooxxx22444 жыл бұрын
"You will never find a guy like me. Loyal, serious and is willing to do anything for you" "If I ever see you, I will really hit you with my *vehicle*" -this was said by a "nice guy" when I rejected bec I was getting choked up with him controlling me even when we didnt even had any relationship (we were not even that close)
@lady_stog4 жыл бұрын
Holy shit 😟 I'm so glad you got rid of his toxic insecure ass... Hope you're okay now! Hugs!
@khizarch49104 жыл бұрын
Media that says this kind of insecure bulshit is fine is a BIG PROBLEM.
@babyboomer62724 жыл бұрын
Jesus Christ that went dark..............
@teresaellis70624 жыл бұрын
I hope you are okay. Dang he is creepy.
@khizarch49104 жыл бұрын
Pyx Hey. as a single guy who was the never-went-for-a-girl-because-he-will-get-into-an-arranged-marriage-later guy, I resent that statement. It sounds too dark and gives no hope to the actual ‘nice guys’. The empathetic and can take no for answer type. (Not that I’d know.)
@Aurelia21473 жыл бұрын
Repeat after me: "It doesn't matter how helpful and kind I am, no one ows me anything and vice versa" If you give gifts and expect something in return it's not a gift, it's manipulation!
@mrtyrant16803 жыл бұрын
Tell that to every guy who ever pursuit a girl and had to waste their time, energy and money only to get turned down afterwords instead of before it. Seriously, if someone gives you a gift without it being a special occasion. There's usually some reason behind it and you shouldn't accept if you're not interested on the person.
@Aurelia21473 жыл бұрын
@@mrtyrant1680 The thing is that every time you try to get to know someone you have to risk getting turned down. That’s normal and that’s life. Therefore „wasting“ time and energy, potentially even money (even though I don’t think that’s necessary while dating) is a part of the risk. Also, the person you’re pursuing doesn’t owe you anything. Imagine a girl that you’re perhaps not really sure about yet would „waste“ their time with you and then expect you to propose to them. Wouldn’t that be strange? Wouldn’t it be unnatural or even scary? I would argue by saying you „wasted time and energy“ that you’re expecting the same from a girl/woman. It’s your responsibility to not be hurt and your responsibility to set boundaries. There are always people that’ll try to take advantage, unfortunately, but most people are just looking exactly like you and more often than not in dating - it’s simply not a match. So in the end dating is risking being hurt or turned down and there’s nothing that can change that.
@mrtyrant16803 жыл бұрын
@Someone 333 I repeat, if someone gives you a gift without it being a special occasion, there's usually something behind it. Especially if it's a expensive or extravagant gift. (Birthday, Christmas or other holiday gifts don't count, because I highly doubt that you get gifts otherwise unless you're a girl.)
@joy-ow4ey3 жыл бұрын
@@mrtyrant1680 Had the gift giving situation happen to me once, I could sense the guy's ulterior motives. Thankfully it was nothing too expensive, I gave him a gift in return.
@Yggdrasill8 Жыл бұрын
@@Aurelia2147 What I am about to say is a little offensive, but switching the roles around. When a women freely gives sex to a top tier man who has many options in girls, that man doesn't owe that girl a committed relationship either. A lot of girls pursuing these "friends with benefits" where the parameters of the relationship was already established from the beginning to then later demand the guy to be in a committed relationship, because the girl developed feelings later on, doesn't work that way either. Men cannot put commitment coins (time, effort, money, resources, loyalty, etc) into a girl and expect sex in return. A women cannot put sex coins into an attractive guy and expect a committed relationship in return.
@nmarrs85394 жыл бұрын
I think this, this trope in movies has hands down done more damage to my relationships. In the movies the “nice” guy gets the girl but really he’s a borderline stalker who can’t take a hint. I thought I was a “nice guy” but really I was just a coward. It took a long time to realize and plenty of therapy to fix that.
@teresaellis70624 жыл бұрын
Understanding yourself is the best thing in the world. I'm glad that you were able to achieve that. It took me years to understand why I deliberately tried to scare guys away by acting odd or rude when they showed interest in me. I, too, finally figured out who I was and I like myself much better for it. I also make for a much better friend. :) Movies TV shows can really mess people up by creating a "normal" that isn't healthy.
@doll_dress_swap124 жыл бұрын
Good for you!
@Aaron-kj8dv4 жыл бұрын
Saaaaaaaame dude. I didn't go to therapy but now I see I should have. There's also so much in the media about how "respect women" is portrayed. It's sold as if you respect them they'll give you what you want and when it doesn't work that you become super frustrated and that's where the outbursts come from. For me I was afraid to ask for what I wanted because I used to internalize rejection. I was lucky enough to have a very patient friend walk me through my own bullshit (as well as he could, he's not a therapist). It also gets reinforced a lot when people say "you're such a nice guy" as compliment which leads to even more frustration when you don't get your needs met. Although this is going to be unpopular it's true. Women tend to play a huge role in it as well. They'll keep nice guys in their orbit to get validation and give them crumbs to keep them around and then play victim when the guy finally blows up. At the end of the day it's insecure people manipulating other insecure people to feel better about themselves.
@carlathedestructor24544 жыл бұрын
@@nmarrs8539 It takes a lot of courage to be this self aware and honest about how your behavior affected others. Congratulations on your sobriety! I'm 2 years clean myself.
@Lafemmefutile4 жыл бұрын
It takes a lot to examine yourself. You are on the right path. Carry on!
@lancerguy36674 жыл бұрын
As humans, we don't realize how easy a scale we grade ourselves on. As a general rule, we all perceive ourselves as nobler, more intelligent, and more competent than we necessarily appear to other people. Some people say that "nice" isn't a noteworthy thing to be. That it's the bare minimum of what should be expected... I agree with this to an extent, but only so far. Kind people make our lives better, and there's no shame in appreciating people who make our lives better. Rather, I feel that "nice" is praise that *is* noteworthy... but ONLY if it's being used by someone else to describe you, rather than a self-appraisal. Since, as mentioned, humans aren't the best judges of their own virtues.
@gera95764 жыл бұрын
"we are the heroes of our own history"
@mfmageiwatch4 жыл бұрын
Lmao...
@Firegen14 жыл бұрын
All of this. Attributed by others not by own estimation.
@jeffjones66134 жыл бұрын
Well said.
@davidfernandoalavamaya31764 жыл бұрын
You are assuming most poeple have high self steem.
@andrelizevanderwalt32184 жыл бұрын
Meg from Hercules: "Well you know how men are. They think that "no" means "yes" and "get lost!" means "Take me! I'm yours."
@okboomer38534 жыл бұрын
Glenna Smith I mean it’s quarantine so you have time to rewatch it now :)
@terrydavis12864 жыл бұрын
I kinda think of meg as the female badboy character
@luxsuperbia15314 жыл бұрын
in defense of my boi Heracles he was legitimately nice and always respected her boundaries, the scene where she tried to seduce him is the prime example since he was more interested in actually getting to know her than in "getting to *know* her", at the end of the day Heracles WASN'T just a shallow man who just wanted her body, but a trust worthy friend who saw the good in her and was literally willing to give up everything he had built up for her safety, that's a good boi right there.
@christianali54314 жыл бұрын
Andrelize Van Der Walt to be fair, though, Meg had had her heart broken one too many times and was convinced that all men are like this. We created a nice guy Trope as a way of illustrating how not every man in the world is driven by his passions, and can show kindness. Unfortunately, overtime, people began to be inspired by these romantic leads to put on a false halo of kindness around themselves to make themselves look more romantic and thus, more appealing to Women. In turn this causes the nice guy to commit a greater act of perversity than even the overtly hormonal alpha male.
@alexman3784 жыл бұрын
Well, to be fair, women are responsible for that one
@grisha89834 жыл бұрын
I was dating a "nice guy" a few years ago after he wore me down enough to finally say yes. 500 days of summer was one of the movies we watched together, it was so ironic and he felt so uncomfortable straight after because the similarities were so glaring lol. That's all behind me now thankfully, and I've happily found my Ben Wyatt. ❤
@jubairzidan99514 жыл бұрын
Parks and rec damn
@tempestholmes4 жыл бұрын
Right? How awesome is it to find a genuinely good, kind man who wants to be in a relationship with another real person? Found mine too! (at last)
@ffrraann1234 жыл бұрын
Best final of a story 😭😭😭♥️♥️♥️
@Dany_C.4 жыл бұрын
I love me some BEN❤️❤️
@KarlaMartinez-wf6xd4 жыл бұрын
You sound like me, i have a guy who has the typical nice guy behaviour and i was sort of dating him, i left.... and now he's bulliyng me into submission to go out with him again... 😑
@MargaritaOnTheRox4 жыл бұрын
It's so funny when the "nice guy" complains hot girls won't date him, and someone suggests they go for a girl who's average. "Why should I?" Dude, you're not entitled to date any woman you want. If you can have high standards, why can't she?
@sregan54154 жыл бұрын
Exactly, it reaks of the misogyny and male entitlement of our society. "Women should stop being so superficial and want me for meee" (I heard this is from a "nice guy" in his late 30s, still living with parents, overweight with drinking issues and ONLY interested in 10 years' younger classically attractive, slim women with their shit together)
@maxalaintwo35784 жыл бұрын
Ouch. Why you gotta fucking kill em?
@sregan54154 жыл бұрын
Manophere. com loooll, it’s ‘your brain’... ‘you’re the one with privilege’... you’re still not helping your case
@dave146474 жыл бұрын
Really good point
@alyssaw7504 жыл бұрын
@Manophere. com The Handmaid's Tale was also based on real things. Look it up. The author Margaret Atwood has said such.
@jacobcook69214 жыл бұрын
I used to be a niceguy. I would pine women from a far, not express my feelings, and do things for women and expect something back in return. It took me awhile to learn that when I was young that this was not an authentic way to be. So, I learned that listening, respecting boundaries, and giving full support WAS what I wanted to be all along. I have a happy relationship now and it was all worth it to learn that being authentic and up front about how I feel while respecting the person across from me is the way to be.
@miamafalda11184 жыл бұрын
Character development!
@amazingbro67234 жыл бұрын
Nice man, how are you doing now😀
@ladyredl32104 жыл бұрын
That's some fantastic personal growth, and you found someone who liked you for you! Awsome!
@adeleaslan81823 жыл бұрын
Glad you’ve gotten better now
@MK-dv5oq3 жыл бұрын
@_jeff _ “bro” he never said that women didn’t like the way he acted and he said that when he changed he realized that’s how he wanted to be.
@Kizamo3 жыл бұрын
A big turn off about the “nice guy” is his entitlement. He thinks people owe him something just because he’s nice. Real nice people don’t expect something just for being a decent person.
@RatPfink669 ай бұрын
Entitlement can be unintended. And it's just as obnoxious when it is!!!
@Vampirefreak22824 жыл бұрын
I think society is finally recognizing that sometimes the most abusive people are the ones that were "so nice" in the beginning. This is how so many people get trapped in abusive / toxic relationships with the "nice guy". It's all roses, and sweetness, until jealousy, projecting etc kick in.
@rafaelrmrz323 жыл бұрын
That's not a "nice guy" ffs. That's a regular abuser during the honeymoon phase.
@mammamonssterr3 жыл бұрын
@_jeff _ nah, nice guys are shit (this is the topic we're talking about here) and girls/women have nothing to do with this.
@jlrobe263 жыл бұрын
Do people really get trapped with "nice guys"? Most NIce guys are pretty harmless. I have never met a woman who actually feared her Nice guy. Women leave nice guys all of the time. Women get trapped by sexy men, who are bad. Why? Because these men magnetize these women toward them, and these women can't break free from their magnetic pull. Nice Guys are characterized by having virtually no magnetic pull whatsoever. All they have is validation and service, and women can leave that pretty easily when they find a sexier option.
@LifeLikeSage3 жыл бұрын
In nature this behavior in males is called "mate guarding". It's thought to have arisen from the biological fact that male paternity is not assured.
@loturzelrestaurant3 жыл бұрын
@@LifeLikeSage This video here can only give you a 'Start'. The Nice-Guy-Pandemic is BIG and COMPLEX (and yet all so simple...) so i recommend watching more Content-about-this-Topic.
@fasshunmonsuta33774 жыл бұрын
A lot of “nice guys”, tend to be covert narcissists.
@jpeg.600x24 жыл бұрын
I tend to think that an uncovert narcissist is a little bit more moral over a covert narcissist as they tend to hide their motives
@fasshunmonsuta33774 жыл бұрын
Justin Die I agree, it’s harder to spot a covert rather than a grandiose narcissist until you’re involved with them for the most part, but there’s behavioral patterns that are there if you look. Sometimes they slip up and you can see it more clearly. I feel like people like this (nice guys) even if not covert narcissists, tend to have similar mindsets. Which is, sad. It’s all stemming from deep insecurity and a lot of the time a deep sense of entitlement.
@Thisworldisagoner4 жыл бұрын
Touche!
@thedavidjscott_4 жыл бұрын
As a nice guy, BIG YUP. I'm learning to be self-aware of that, its a hard thing to learn. Trying to unlearn that in my marriage.
@rainpooper70884 жыл бұрын
bryan diaz varela Fun fact: Narcissistic personality disorder is way more common in men than it is in women.
@emiprzyczyna52224 жыл бұрын
In my opiniom THE REAL nice guy of Friends was Chandler. The way he treated Monica was awesome. He became really mature and supportive partner, he always respected her and they went together through thick and thin.
@Visplight4 жыл бұрын
Heck, even Joey was very nice. Stupid, but nice.
@haileyadkins84124 жыл бұрын
Visplight yeah and at least joey didn’t pretend to be nice to sleep with women. When he wanted to sleep with someone he let them know up front.
@blehll52504 жыл бұрын
i wouldn't know about "thick and thin" tho...pun intended
@emiprzyczyna52224 жыл бұрын
@@blehll5250 There was an episode when Monica was still obese and Chandler loved her anyway, if that's what you meant.
@blehll52504 жыл бұрын
@@emiprzyczyna5222 oh really didn't know about that. thanks for letting me know
@mohitzambare3 жыл бұрын
I am so glad my brother introduced me to The Take videos. I'll change though me changing won't fix the girl I broke. I always thought i am a nice guy and why I am single turns out I am actually one of those knock off nice guys which actually affected my real nice guy trope. But I'll change for better. Be a nice guy, not the nice guy knock off.
@foldingwishes4 жыл бұрын
I think the reason the 'bad boy' usually attracts the girl is how genuine they are Because they have a strong sense of self they are able to show more aspects of their personality naturally. A 'nice' person has a weak sense of self and is at the mercy of approval. They are not able to truly be themselves: they can't help but wear a mask based on how they think they should appear. It's a tiring charade and when it fails they snap. They went through all the trouble of acting in a way that pleases others, and yet it still failed to work. The bad boy does not try to play the charade. He lives freely and still reaps the approval the nice guy so desperately desires, so the nice guy becomes resentful. The nice guy does not realize that they do not need to play this charade. It does not protect them, and it cannot please others the way genuinely being themselves ever could. Once they develop a sense of self via non-contingent self esteem, they will realize the charade was never necessary and they will finally be able to exude that authenticity that currently eludes them.
@iremever84644 жыл бұрын
I agree. The reason women might find bad boys attractive is not inherently because they are bad, it's just that they are often confident and assertive. Sure they are not always ideal partners but they still show some authenticity instead of putting on this fake persona. Confidence is an attractive trait, and many women are also attracted to healthy, funny, confident individuals who are not "bad boys". It's not about the bad part like some of these incels claim.
@iremever84644 жыл бұрын
@Glenna Smith I'm not a man so I don't really know but confidence is an attractive trait regardless of gender in my opinion.
@jellaohnesorge51124 жыл бұрын
or you could just „authentically“ not be an asshole and accept a woman rejecting you even though you‘re „nice“. The conclusion from this video isn‘t „stop acting like you respect women and just be your authentic misogynistic self“ but „maybe consider seeing women as individuals with a free will and taking ‚no‘ for an answer.“
@isaacgray29094 жыл бұрын
@Glenna Smith Well a lot of men also pursues women who are assertive and "aggressive". There's a reason why characters like Azula from Avatar and Mean Girls are popular among male viewers, hence the term "bad bitch" you would occasionally see from them. So as said before, confidence and assertiveness are one of the major traits that people look for. If you don't have any self-esteem or confident to show a thing about yourself like a hobby or personality, then what would any men or women like from you.
@crabula4 жыл бұрын
That's a very eloquent and insightful explanation.
@hsheinloo4 жыл бұрын
It warms my heart that we are all collectively becoming more aware and not letting screen narratives twist our perception of what true values should be. :) Proud of us!
@betenoire25344 жыл бұрын
I blame a lot of these movies for misleading a lot of young impressionable guys to thinking that that's what women wanted. I know for myself that was definitely the case. I'd go see rom-coms with my mom from like 2005-2007 when I was a preteen/teen, and I really believed what I saw because they always showed it worked in the end. I can only say that I'm just glad that I didn't continue to be the "creepy nice guy" for very long. From 16-18 years old until I grew out of it.
@Tes-qe1jc4 жыл бұрын
Check out comedian Patrice O’Neal on KZbin. Thank me latter.
@beamarie80414 жыл бұрын
I’m guessing it was Adam Sandler movies. That guy is the realistic living embodiment of what women do not want.
@TheLunaKeat4 жыл бұрын
Happy for you man. Normally movies do that because not even long ago movies and TV shows where manly created, directed and written by old white men who grew up watching movies and TV shows made by old white men with even more old-fashioned and prejudiced thoughts. So the movies used to treat female characters always as a love interest, sexual villan or family member. You can see that by the Bechdel test. In old movies women rarely had friends, goals, full names or anything that wasn't related to males in the movies. And they only exist to make the main male character evolve in some way. That is a quite common trope mix that show that quite well. The badass girl+The chosen one, you have a female character who is super badass, trainned all her life, study about the subject in the movie/book/series better than anyone... and a clumsy guy that didn't even knew he had powers or something like that... and somehow he is going to save the world while she sits back playing a support role so he can be the hero. '-' There is SO MANY stories like that, that is manly because is made by "nice guys".
@TheLunaKeat4 жыл бұрын
@@beamarie8041 I think Adam Sandler in movies is not that bad. He insists, but not to a point that annoys or scare the woman. Also, he is full of confidence, quite funny and actually seems to real care. Like in the movie 50 First Dates, he goes after her a lot, but he actually take his time to know her, they actually had chemistry in the first day, he was direct with her from the start, he was worry about not telling her the truth everyday, he wanted he to evolve and be abble to live beyond the bubble her family created. And it wasn't "just because she was hot", he dated a bunch of hot girls before her. Was because he actually learned and liked who she was. Same goes for all of his movies that came to my mind right now.
@leofreaking3 жыл бұрын
(500) days of summer ist such a great example! I watched it the first time, when it came out. I was a lonely, sexually frustrated teenager - and probably would have also considered myself a 'nice guy' as well. Then I watched it again a few years back, and it was astounding how wrong my view of the relationship was. I mean both characters are flawed, which made them feel so human. But really, I was surprised how Tom seemed like a total jerk. Actually made me reflect some of my behaviour as well. Amazing film!
@julianmars89684 жыл бұрын
“I’m just a boy in loooove I can’t be held responsible for my actiooons I have no underlying issues to address, I’m certifiably cute and adorably obsessed They say love makes you crazy therefore you can’t call him crazy So when you call him crazy, you’re just calling him in love” -Trent, crazy ex girlfriend
@shoujokadyan55024 жыл бұрын
Omg, Trent was an excellent example of a Nice Guy 😅
@MrIansmitchell4 жыл бұрын
@@shoujokadyan5502 Trent was the best character on that whole show.
@shoujokadyan55024 жыл бұрын
@@MrIansmitchell I still don't know if he actually ran with coyotes or not 😂
@FadouaO1234 жыл бұрын
Oh boy! Trent is on a whole other level of crazy! 🤣
@strawberryfrog764 жыл бұрын
I WAS HUMMING THAT SONG ALL THROUGHOUT THE VIDEO
@sayraochoa58974 жыл бұрын
A few years ago a nice guy fell in love with me. He was a good friend and we shared hobbies and good times. When we met I was dating a kind of popular guy. When we broke up a lot of friends thought that the nice guy and I should be together, but I couldn't develop romantic feelings for him and I got to the point of feeling guilty about it. He never spoke to me directly about his feelings, even though his family and some mutual friends did. I was grateful that he didn't. The very idea of rejecting him made me feel like a bad person. He don't overwhelmed me with romantic gestures but when he made a few movements and I didn't respond in the same way, he understood my posture and act as if nothing happend. That make me respect him so much. We're still friends. A few years later he started dating another girl and I felt truly relieved. He turned out to be a real nice guy. However, I learned from this experience that many times women are pressured to accept the feelings of nice guys for the simple fact of being good friends or good people. This makes us doubt our own feelings and feel unjustifiable guilt. I want to find love but I don't want to feel pressured to be with someone no matter how nice the guy is.
@loturzelrestaurant3 жыл бұрын
This video here can only give you a 'Start'. The Nice-Guy-Pandemic is BIG and COMPLEX (and yet all so simple...) so i recommend watching more Content-about-this-Topic.
@clintirwin34682 жыл бұрын
Nice guys are boring. The discussion is filled with all these words, but nice guys are boring. Show a woman a gentleman and a pig, and she will have sex with the pig every time. Because the pig is exciting. That's just biology.
@plasticlope79952 жыл бұрын
Bruh you just described what im experiencing right now
@thatpunygirl___149yes82 жыл бұрын
I give a round of applause to that guy.
@flusel49492 жыл бұрын
This sounds EXACTLY like an experience I had with someone once.
@under30894 жыл бұрын
I'm so tired of men constantly describing themselves as "nice". What does that MEAN?? "Nice" isn't a personality, it's just being a decent human being. Stop acting like women are obligated to be interested in you because you are polite or a good friend. Women aren't machines you put niceness coins in and get sex in return. Don't act passively and never express your feeling to someone, then complain about being "friendzoned".
@humanormachine29364 жыл бұрын
It's sad that men are notoriously so awful at treating women like human beings that we have a subset who feel the need to call themselves "nice". "Nice" is a vague descriptor, should be the bare minimum for how to treat all other human beings, and doesn't entitle you to anyone's attention, affection, or other access to their bodies.
@aaendi66614 жыл бұрын
I'm so tired of men and women constantly complaining about a complete strawman that doesn't exist. Yeah, when women or LGBT person asks for sex, it's because they're horny, but when a straight male asks for sex, it's some kind of weird Vulcan logic about transactions. Can I just state how I feel, without people trying to question internal thought logic?
@rebekahmikaelson11984 жыл бұрын
@@aaendi6661 no one said men cant want or like sex. the problem is when they feel entitled to it, refuse to take no for an answer, or feel women owe them sex for being "nice." or if they dont make their intentions clear from the beginning and pretend to be friends with someone when in reality they're just waiting for the person to give them sex.
@aaendi66614 жыл бұрын
@@rebekahmikaelson1198 Women and gay men act the same way. People just don't notice it because they never question it. When you're a straight man everybody puts you through shit-tests.
@lochofmceo4 жыл бұрын
@Cocoa Lee it does exist even when you're clear up front
@name_16173 жыл бұрын
THANK YOU FOR PUTTING ROSS IN. i’ve always said he was toxic and people never see it
@perovrljic54093 жыл бұрын
In that show it was on both sides. Rachel "broke up" his relationships with Juli and Mona and also she kind of did a "nice guy" or "nice girl" thing with Joshua.
@ericjerimiasuiam66053 жыл бұрын
Let's be honest. Both Ross n Rachel are control freaks. They deserve each other.
@averythecoolcat3 жыл бұрын
Didn't he wind up getting the girl, though? In fact, when he and Rachel had outs, he wound up banging others, throughout the series. So, his being toxic kind of backs up the bad boy vs. nice guy argument somewhat.
@whyohwhy96792 жыл бұрын
Yes, I thought Ross was a whiny a*hole from the beginning. He didn’t do anything for any girl that didn’t somehow benefit him.
@name_16172 жыл бұрын
@@whyohwhy9679 exactly!!!
@l.h.78554 жыл бұрын
I dated a guy yeeears ago, who was known as "the nice guy" in the group. I wasn't that attracted to him, but I was younger and naive ..and not only him, but also our common friends talked be into giving him a chance because "you will never meet a nice guy like him again". And , that I didn't want him was "due to my fear of "being truly loved"". The first weeks he refered to me as an angel and SO perfect. After my unsurenesss didn't fade and me questioning his behavior a couple of times, he snapped, yelled at me, told me I was satan myself and didn't deserve love and should go to hell. None of my "friends" back then believed this. Because "he was too nice". I was the bad one. It took me FOREVER to realize what the fuck was going on. I wish back then people were more aware of this toxic traits.
@amazingbro67234 жыл бұрын
What happened after that
@randombrokeperson4 жыл бұрын
Was he love bombing you? That kind of sounds like that's what that was. And it's something narcissists are said to do a quite a lot.
@l.h.78554 жыл бұрын
@@randombrokeperson sorry, I only saw this now: Yes he was definitely love bombing me. At that time I was fresh out of a relationship and had a LOW self-esteem. I was perfectly vulnerable to this tactic. And speaking about being easily manipulated: I even believed him all the trash he talked ... about ME being the crazy one. So like a week after, I went to a therapist to find out if I was "crazy" and "incapable of loving". Her reaction was pretty brilliant: "So you actually think the person who first "loved" you and then yelled at you and insulted you, is the normal one? Good that you came here. Our goal should be to find out why the hell you'd let such a person make you questioning your own sanity." So I continued the lessons to learn how to trust myself / my intuition strong enough, to run for the hills if something feels off. She was the best therapist ever and It helped me SO much in the long run. I used to date the "complicated" guys before.. and now I am in a VERY happy and healthy relationship since years. So...in a weird way; I am "thankful" for this experience. And that guy...He actually wrote me years later apologizing for everything. He was then seeing a therapist and apparently realized some things.
@randombrokeperson4 жыл бұрын
@@l.h.7855 Wow! I'm so glad your story turned out for the best! Many blessings to you!
@amazingbro67234 жыл бұрын
@@l.h.7855 wow, in a way you also answered my question🙂
@TheAlexaFdz4 жыл бұрын
irl i’ve had worst experiences with the “nice” guys and they always end up being so emotional manipulative
@swayamsiddha154 жыл бұрын
? ? ? ?? ? ? ? ? yeah, me too.
@andreaslind63384 жыл бұрын
Wow, I'm astonished by how much contempt there is for nice guys in the comments, as a nice guy myself I can tell you that a lot of the motives girls (and this video made by women) attribute to us is wrong....yes there are sleaseballs out there who try to worm their way into a girls pants by acting nice but mostly it is for other motives, for example the emotional manipulation nice guys do is not because we want to imprison women( that would defeat the purpose of being nice) but because we see you looking at the bad boys and feel insecure. I will stay on here if anyone has any questions, but please be respectful.
@swayamsiddha154 жыл бұрын
Andreas Lind i agree that there are some actually nice ‘nice guys’ out there like it was mentioned in the video. please don’t take these comments personally. :D
@AlexFlockhart4 жыл бұрын
@@lsdieleknfkk It's the same principle as someone saying they have a superior intellect or other self-described positive attributes. Without showing the trait, describing yourself in this way just makes you seem like a grandiose narcissist. The manipulative and controlling behaviour attributed to narcissism also seems to be correlated to the "nice guy" persona.
@AlasEtéreas4 жыл бұрын
@@andreaslind6338 well maybe there's contempt because many women actually experienced the "nice guy" at least once? I certainly did and it was traumatic. And you are repeating what every thing that a nice guy says as a lazy excuse of their insecure behavior. If you are nice to people, then is okay. If you are a nice guy to women.... then you are not trustworthy.
@LenaleeLee4 жыл бұрын
I feel like "nice guys" typically have an anxious preoccupied attachment style, whereas true nice guys have a secure attachment style. Anxious preoccupied attachment involves putting someone on a pedestal, being needy, feeling insecure and invading other people's space out out of desperation for love. I've read some comments calling "nice guys" narcissists, but they are actually the opposite of typical narcissists in a way. Typical narcissists mostly have an avoidant dismissive attachment style and think they themselves are on a pedestal. Two different extremes of toxicity in love.
@NerdSnipingBatman4 жыл бұрын
Hey thanks for giving me something to google. I wasn't aware of attachment styles. I don't date anymore because I was as you describe it "anxious preoccupied style". Don't get me wrong I did have genuine real feelings for those few I did date...but my insecurity and anxiety about every damn relationship eventually ruined it. I've since learned that it just isn't healthy for me to date...so I'm unfortunately perpetually single.
@LenaleeLee4 жыл бұрын
@@NerdSnipingBatman You're welcome! Actually I'm also anxious preoccupied, so I know exactly what kind of insecurity and anxiety comes with it. However, don't lose hope, we can actually change our insecure attachment style to a secure one with some help and practice. Getting a therapist is the easiest way, but if you're like me and don't have that luxury, the internet (and especially youtube) also has tons of helpful information. Some helpful youtube channels are Coach Craig Kenneth, Nu Mindframe, Briana MacWilliam, Thais Gibson, and Anna Akana. Hope that helps.
@LenaleeLee4 жыл бұрын
@@BluemoonSpaceRock It's actually not set in gender. Anxious pre-occupied people can be both men and women, same for avoidant dismissive (or what people call "emotionally unavailable"). And these two types basically attract each other like magnets (and eventually turn into a toxic relationship). So anyone who is anxious preoccupied will likely subconsciously want an avoidant dismissive partner (and vice versa!). I don't know if you could say women are more often anxious preoccupied and men more often avoidant dismissive. However, it is true that this is the combination that fits the common gender stereotypes. Like when people joke about men getting imprisoned in marriage by their wife. But then again, we also have the nice guy stereotype as seen here and the stereotype that women are ice queens. So it still goes both ways.
@LenaleeLee4 жыл бұрын
@@BluemoonSpaceRock I think people are just unaware about attachment styles, and thus make false assumptions (e.g. that their behavior comes from being a certain gender rather than childhood trauma). And as you mentioned, it's easy to retweet if it resonates. Anxious-preoccupied (and maybe fearful avoidant ?) women probably see it and think "wow that is so me", whereas secure and avoidant dismissive women would probably ignore it. I guess that the whole concept of attachment theory is something that isn't as well known as it should be. I also only discovered about it a few months ago. It's something that should be common knowledge (and a must know for parents). There is actually a lot of information about it online (and in books) that could be helpful for a lot of people.
@gabyjuen4 жыл бұрын
There are different types of narcissism. I highly recommend you the videos in the channels of Inner Integration and Dr. Ramani on that subject 😉
@realsanmer2 жыл бұрын
I'd like to see a movie about a "nice" guy who's in love with a girl, but throughout the story he realises his toxic traits, works to get rid of them, and ends up befriending the girl, instead of becoming her boyfriend, in the end.
@wcthesecret2 жыл бұрын
..what would the point in that be.he gets nothing in the end. He actually gets less than nothing in the end. He gets punished in the end. For what being in love?
@realsanmer2 жыл бұрын
@@wcthesecret he gets a friend. I'd say that's something.
@jennakins98 Жыл бұрын
Ironically, one of the characters shown in this video starts off as a nice guy but develops and eventually supports the main character's pursuit of her main love interest. It's Duckie from Pretty in Pink. And the fact that he didn't get her in the end caused a lot of uproar with audiences in the 80s! Lol!!
@hastensavoir7782 Жыл бұрын
@@realsanmer no one wants more friends lolz
@wcthesecret Жыл бұрын
@@realsanmer you can be friends with anybody you want. Why would you want to be friends with a woman that you’re trying to get with?
@natethegreat78214 жыл бұрын
Ok so as it turns out, I am in fact a “nice guy”. Today with this video, I begin my journey away from my past tendencies.
@ajbasc4 жыл бұрын
Nathaniel Banton YES thanks for recognizing it and changing🥺 you're already better off than most guys
@izzyiz2294 жыл бұрын
You got this
@victoriarose68864 жыл бұрын
HELL YEAH I'M SO PROUD OF YOU
@ronjag1584 жыл бұрын
This is one of the best comment, no anger or frustration, no defense or blame, just recognition and going for growth. You go! 👏🏻
@hambonefakenamington694 жыл бұрын
Glad you recognised it. Kudos! :)
@haileecollins8734 жыл бұрын
'if someone has to constantly repeat they're a nice person, they are NOT a nice person' I don't remember who said that but I feel like that applies here.
@julianchristensen68953 жыл бұрын
or "People say I'm chArismATiC!" same logic.
@hopiahon5634 жыл бұрын
“chivalry is dead” chivalry and my patience for guys like these have that in common
@AxxLAfriku4 жыл бұрын
I will never be dead because I am immortal because of my videos I make the videos that will last forever
@sokkvabekkr59734 жыл бұрын
@@AxxLAfriku sir this is a wendy's drive thru
@johannageisel53904 жыл бұрын
Chivalry is the art of fighting on horseback. If a Nice Guy™ wants me to like him for his Chivalry, I first want to see him defeat his opponent in a jousting duel.
@qmulus14 жыл бұрын
It is dead though.
@sokkvabekkr59734 жыл бұрын
@@qmulus1 they never said it wasn't
@benedictifye3 жыл бұрын
The Notebook is another example of a guy who “won’t take no for an answer”. But she falls for him so it’s “okay” and a True Love story.
@clintirwin34682 жыл бұрын
Half the human race would not exist if guys immediately took no for an answer.
@nicoleonlysometimes8242 жыл бұрын
@@clintirwin3468 clearly he did too much and was a stalker
@clintirwin34682 жыл бұрын
@@nicoleonlysometimes824 And 99% the the audience of The Notebook is women.
@Megan-jx3dy2 жыл бұрын
@@clintirwin3468 Uhh, I’m really hoping you do understand no still means no. Men and women both need to understand that no means you stop completely and move on.
@thepagecollective2 жыл бұрын
@@Megan-jx3dy No means no in college classroom theories about sex. You should read some of the vast majority of the erotica WOMEN write that make billions a year. In real life, there's no that means no, and no that means "convince me." College classroom sex theories seem to have been put together by virgins. In real life there is something called seduction. College professors think seduction is rape. The vast populace OF WOMEN do not.
@icymoons4 жыл бұрын
nice guys may be friendzoned, but they girlfriendzoned the girl first.
@trinaq4 жыл бұрын
Hard to argue with that assessment, had they just been honest with her from the get go, then PERHAPS they could have spared themselves the heartache earlier! 💔
@lolsous4 жыл бұрын
But really, the friendzone doesn't exist, people are allowed not to be attracted to someone, this is normal and can, sometimes, change over time, there is no "zone" you will fall into if you don't act fast
@memes_for_kings4 жыл бұрын
Facts
@Me-vn3gz4 жыл бұрын
JUST A FAN Did you watch the video dude?
@AlexFlockhart4 жыл бұрын
Couldn't have said it better.
@yuliaxgon4 жыл бұрын
This video literally saved my life! I’ve had a “good guy” friend for 8 years and Bc of this video I realized that all he was was a stalker and abuser. Thank you for making this!
@bingeingforsoup4 жыл бұрын
I hope he doesn't keep stalking you!
@stevemyopinion4234 жыл бұрын
if he your friend how is he stalking you, friend call or show up.
@seansmith47304 жыл бұрын
@@stevemyopinion423 solid point. to say he was stalking means she had to have had some feeling about it being creepy before yes? i'm not trying to be mean or anyrhing i'm genuinely curious. I've dealt with a nice guy before and I immediately saw red flags. even though I stayed friends with him I was very aware of his toxic behaviors and it started with me thinking "hey this guy isn't being very nice like he said he was!"
@mohamedbenhamida37484 жыл бұрын
Did he physically hurt u? or try to emotionally guilt u into dating him?(not asked u out) Because if he did how are u still friends with sick person like that?
@amazingbro67234 жыл бұрын
What happened to you after you watched this video and your "good guy"
@magsguerra4 жыл бұрын
I was friends with a ‘nice guy’ once. I just failed to see it till I started dating my husband. Then he professed his love for me, attempted to kiss me and then proceeded to sleep with one of my friends so I could ‘feel the pain of watching him with someone else.’ When that didn’t work, he proclaimed that he couldn’t take the pain of seeing me anymore and walked away from our 10 year friendship.Havent spoken to him for 15 years. Super nice guy, right there.
@corinneobrien71334 жыл бұрын
magsguerra thats one of the things i really hate about “nice guys”. They waste years of our lives in fake friendships with us, deceiving us, then if/when they FINALLY accept theyll never have a chance with us they leave or rape us. Because the whole time they just wanted sex. Way to waste years of our lives in this “friendship” just for proximity to us while they test out new ways to try to manipulate us into sex. It sounds like in your case your marriage made himrealize he’d never get a chance. I had a “niceguy” friend for like 6 years and then when i came out to him as a lesbian he raped me and we never spoke again. It wasn’t totally out of left field. He knew since day one that i was probably a lesbian, i was never fully in the closet. but i wasn’t sure if there was ever going to be some random exception where i might meet one guy i liked at some point in my life, so i was not confident yet with the label. So ever since he met me he knew i was at least 90% gay. He really spent 6 whole years in a friendship deceiving me into thinking he was a genuine friend when really he was latching onto the 10% chance that i might one day like a male even though that male was litrtally never going to be him...
@mariamaabdi96754 жыл бұрын
@@corinneobrien7133dear god, im so sorry that happenned to you! I hope you got the help you need for that, and also that he rotted in jail!
@kalakritistudios4 жыл бұрын
Well, atleast he walked away if he couldn't see you. That's way simple. Less complex.
@gracehaven54594 жыл бұрын
@@corinneobrien7133 I'm so sorry that happened to you and I hope you are doing better now
@mariomendoza80414 жыл бұрын
10 years to make a move.. you dodged a bullet there!
@angeldiaz16233 жыл бұрын
In other words let’s not confuse low self esteem, lack of confidence, judgment and decision making with niceness.
@LadyBug0204114 жыл бұрын
The fact that you used Chidi Anagonye’s image but didn’t talk about how he’s a genuinely nice guy is very upsetting to me.
@RK-ep8qy4 жыл бұрын
Nice is an understatement for Chidi, he's a solid good man with the right values.
@marvel0964 жыл бұрын
Facts
@oof-rr5nf4 жыл бұрын
EXACTLY
@oof-rr5nf4 жыл бұрын
@@RK-ep8qy best value being wanting to improve as a person
@kelliehorn10824 жыл бұрын
TEAM CHIDI
@purpleflows56804 жыл бұрын
I feel like most “nice guys” are mama’s boys who use the same techniques to be their mother’s golden child in the dating world. The equation is, “I find out what you like to please you into giving me what I want.” Every “nice guy”/mama boy that I’ve known has had intense narcissistic tendencies. They feel entitled to attention because they are “perfect” and giving you what you “want.” These guys have never really developed their own sense of self and are deeply insecure in their relationship to masculinity. In my experience, they have a ton of anger, resentment, and entitlement towards women. These guys can be scary.
@haveagoodday6294 жыл бұрын
Rose Star I have experienced this
@paradoxacres10634 жыл бұрын
I don't know.."mama’s boy" sounds *sexist* 🤔
@cherusiderea13304 жыл бұрын
@@paradoxacres1063 Really? Why?
@benutzername18754 жыл бұрын
fancy seeing you here, Dr. Freud
@iremever84644 жыл бұрын
This is soooooo true. You put my exact thoughts into words.
@rhondahoward80254 жыл бұрын
This makes me think of that scene in Joker with the three teenage assholes on the train bullying this girl on the train. One of them literally said, "Come on, he's being _nice_ to you," when she was sarcastically offered a french fry. When she politely declined, clearly uncomfortable, they started _throwing_ fries at her and when she got up and moved to another section of the bus, she was quickly called "BITCH".
@benjaminr89614 жыл бұрын
lol those are the guys woman sleep with.
@kayleighbrown4594 жыл бұрын
@@benjaminr8961 Obviously some poor souls did if they thought that would work
@blaze5569224 жыл бұрын
Those were grown as men. Not teenagers lol
@FiresideBoomer4 жыл бұрын
That said that same girl does nothing when Arthur starts getting beaten by said same guys
@steffis98064 жыл бұрын
That scene was very realistic - sadly.
@lightsideofsin89693 жыл бұрын
It got to a point where I had a reputation... "The heartbreaker", "the friendzoner", "the cold one". These sound so much cooler than what actually happened! A lot of male friends wanted more than friendship from me over the years. Every time one of them confessed that to me, I was the heartbroken one because it always ends the same way. I lose a friend and as a reward I am suddenly the bad guy... They rob me of a friend and then they get to blame me for hurting them ... It hasn't happened for several years now and I'm in a happy relationship. They last time I rejected someone, I simply refused to feel guilty for it. I made a bit of a scene to be fair but how do you expect this to go? "Oh by the way, I don't value you as a friend because I only really want a relationship out of you. You haven't suddenly fallen deeply in love with me, therefore you are a monster!" Your feelings are not my responsibility, mate. Handle it like an adult, like the rest of us who didn't get an ice cream after the dentist appointment. You're older than 5 so stop throwing a tantrum!
@jej3451 Жыл бұрын
That's a pretty narcissistic viewpoint. Maybe they cut off the friendship because they didn't want to have to suffer feelings of unrequited love all the time. It's not that they didn't value the friendship; they just needed to protect themselves from neverending rejection.
@sedakoc6686 Жыл бұрын
We have a saying in Turkey that sums up the hypocrisy of so called nice guys: “kizlarin efendi adam yerine pic tercihi.” The translation is: “Girls choose the bastards(playboys) over nice guys.” They like to use it when they got rejected to belittle the woman.
@lydiademarek Жыл бұрын
I think it's possible to continue to be friends with people even if they reject you. I agree space helps, but if you thought they were a good enough person to love, then you probably want to keep being friends with them
@hannahwinterhalder741 Жыл бұрын
@jej3451 I don't think it's narcisstic to look at it like this. The male friends seemed to have blamed her for not having feelings. So what should she do? Fake those feelings so they can be happy?
@velvethunder4 жыл бұрын
let's give some love to ben , chidi , boyle , terry and jake . THE MICHAEL SCHUR'S ACTUAL NICE GUY SQUAD
@shoujokadyan55024 жыл бұрын
That's how you write a genuine nice guy! Yay Michael Schur!!
@snehapradhan55914 жыл бұрын
I only know Chidi, but yeah, he's so amazing!!!! Michael Schur is an amazing human being for creating such wholesome characters!!
@HerHollyness4 жыл бұрын
Don’t skimp on Ron and Andy (and even Larry/Garry/Terry/Jerry) there! Those guys were the best. I always loved how Ron was a stereotypical ‘man’s man’ who never let that cause any fear or hatred in him. He still admired strong women and wanted to boost Leslie, April and, later, Diane up at every opportunity.
@33Jenesis4 жыл бұрын
My guard is automatically up when a guy tells me that he’s a nice guy. He’s either not self aware or he’s trying to sell something to me. I don’t ever tell people that I am nice because nice isn’t 100% who I am. I am capable of being evil, jealous, narrow minded, and unkind.
@saljpal34 жыл бұрын
I have a friend who is genuinely a nice guy and I feel bad for him because his girlfriend treats him like shit.
@Udontkno74 жыл бұрын
Micaella 03 He probably has low self esteem, and telling him that he doesn’t deserve love because of it is kinda shit tbh. So many people let themselves get walked over regardless of gender, do they deserve to get left behind?
@randombrokeperson4 жыл бұрын
@@crushedankles3994 I think your definition is a little screwed. If anything, that person's friend might be a victim of abuse/in an abusive relationship. Even if that (hopefully 🤞🏾) is not the case, genuinely nice people of all genders can have low self-esteem, and be emotionally hurt. Being a nice person or people pleaser does not equal high self-esteem, nor does it automatically mean someone is manipulative. The manipulation comes in when they are nice only in order to get things in return, not for the sake of being a decent human being. You might need to rethink a few definitions.
@crushedankles39944 жыл бұрын
since y'all are misunderstanding my comment i'll just delete it
@danishbutter18474 жыл бұрын
our hearts can be tainted by the world experiences or ourselves doing.
@sharebear91654 жыл бұрын
“Peter Kavinski is a nice guy” John Ambrose: am I a joke?
@alicehermioneannabeth4 жыл бұрын
John Ambrose is a true sweetheart, pure hearted
@KaylaNoelle14 жыл бұрын
They are both really genuine. John Ambrose realized right away when they kissed that LJ didn’t have the same feeling for him and he accepted it. He’s an icon.
@trinaq4 жыл бұрын
Peter and John Ambrose were BOTH sweet guys, Lara Jean definitely had a tough choice to make, either way. But ultimately, John Ambrose accepts that Lara Jean stills loves Peter, and doesn't push her into having feelings for him, and lets her be happy.💖
@laisfrederick54704 жыл бұрын
Peter always respect LJ boundary. Both can be Nice people
@nataliaquiroga40154 жыл бұрын
Peter was the real nice guy for the first movie and John Ambrose is the real nice guy of the second one
@さくら-l8t Жыл бұрын
Unfortunately, the nice guy trope still lives on in the Netflix show, Wednesday. Wednesday is pursued by two guys, both whom she never shows any interest in and simply uses to help further her investigation of the mystery surrounding her school town. Yet they (especially Tyler) act like she keeps giving them “mixed signals” when it’s really just their own perception. (SPOILERS) It also doesn’t help that it’s revealed Tyler is the monster that’s been behind the deaths in town and hides an evil personality.
@hastensavoir7782 Жыл бұрын
98% of girls give MIXED signals and not straightforward emotions.
@CCLOSPINA8 ай бұрын
But Tyler was the villain.
@stevemyopinion4232 ай бұрын
she was kissing tyler so yea i take that a MIX signal.
@mizzmixzy4 жыл бұрын
"Are you playing hard to get?" Oh I hate that.
@enidmasai93844 жыл бұрын
Same. It's like it's so impossible to believe that I genuinely meant no
@marksunboxingzone4 жыл бұрын
You know, I've heard the term so much.... like where did it come from. Has anyone ever like legit 'played hard to get'. Like how does that even work? String a guy or girl along for your own amusement until you finally decide to say yes, for shits and giggles? I've heard the phrase countless times but ever met anyone actually playing hard to get.
@stevemyopinion4234 жыл бұрын
Some do play hard to get. It happens a lot
@QuietlyCurious4 жыл бұрын
"It's easy to ditch someone who's mean to you, but someone who's actually not a bad person will slowly ruin your life forever."
@npcx-mq6cr4 жыл бұрын
Truth
@jacobodom84014 жыл бұрын
"it's easy to ditch someone who's mean to you." Is it? Tell that to the relationships where one is clearly a physically abusive dirtbag
@ellaczeiner39744 жыл бұрын
I just realized I dated a nice girl for a few years. She pursued me until I finally gave in despite not really liking her but figured I would fall for her eventually. She lied to me over and over and let me down constantly, even outing me when I wasn't ready to come out when she didn't want to wait to tell people. She even ruined one of my friend's relationship but gaslighted me into believing she was in the right. Its not until after cutting her off I found out she ruined that relationship because my friend danced with me at a dance and made nice girl jealous. Don't settle for people who you don't like just because they keep trying. You don't owe anyone for an explanation for prioritizing your own feelings. Edit: grammar
@amazingbro67234 жыл бұрын
What happened to her after that
@quickcooking27953 жыл бұрын
there's no such a thing as "nice girl" actually. your ex is basically just your crazy ex.
@ellaczeiner39743 жыл бұрын
@@amazingbro6723 she spent a few months in a mental health facility, tried to reconnect with me and our friends before she got out but no one accepted her apologies. She was around for a little after that before disappearing. Not too long ago she reached out to one of my friends but he didn't respond to her so we don't know where she is now
@hangukhiphop3 жыл бұрын
what do you mean by "outing me when I wasn't ready to come out?"
@ellaczeiner39743 жыл бұрын
@@hangukhiphop I'm gay
@thibautisserant3 жыл бұрын
They forgot the other half of the nice guy trope, especially when it comes to sitcoms. That is growth. In the case of Friends, Ross, as the nice guy, fail his relationship with Rachel, their couple crash and burns. But the interesting part is what comes after. Ross accepts the idea that Rachel doesn't love him and, more importantly, doesn't cut her from his life because in the end, they're still friends. And that's when Ross starts performing acts of kindness without ulterior motives, which genuinely touches Rachel. This evolution from motivated, interested to simply kind is what makes the trope whole and actually present something the audience can get behind.
@stevemyopinion4232 ай бұрын
ross was never a nice guy he was good man from day one of the show.
@NobaraYuki4 жыл бұрын
Honestly a lot of people put Ross as obsessed with Rachel. But like he tried to quit her so many times. Rachel left a voice message to ruin his relationship with Julie, Rachel went to another country to his wedding to confess, shaved his girlfriend’s head. A standard nice guy would stay obsessed. But like she kept sabotaging so many of his relationships. They were both weirdly toxic. But Ross seems to get the majority of the blame when they were both terrible for each other.
@mananexus4 жыл бұрын
Ross and Rachel were both toxic people, whenever one was dating someone else the other would be insanely jealous.
@saanvisudesh28734 жыл бұрын
True. Their relationship in its entirety was toxic. Which is why people favour Chandler and Monica
@missgiroud974 жыл бұрын
And he doesnt fit for me in the nice guy trope
@missgiroud974 жыл бұрын
@@mananexus Rachel was more. Even more obvius. Ross dont sabotage her relationships so much. I dont remember he doing it. He was chill. He was wrong in other things. As a human being.
@saanvisudesh28734 жыл бұрын
Ana Y. Giroud Mendoza I kinda think it’s the opposite. Ross was a great person and a good friend. The bike thing for Phoebe... several other examples. And he was a good friend to Rachel too. It’s just that he was severely insecure and jealous. Probably cuz of his relationship with Carol. That made him kind of a sucky boyfriend.
@katherinemorelle71154 жыл бұрын
“Nice guys” see women as vending machines that they put niceness tokens into and sex falls out of. Which isn’t very nice at all. I remember HATING Xander during the first three seasons of Buffy (especially the end of season 2, not sure I’ve ever forgiven him for that). He got better with Anya, but then got trapped inside his own head again and lost her. But even after that he was still better than he was in high school, acting as a mentor for Dawn. So he did improve. But his high school years were basically everything I hated in “nice guys”.
@mishthemaverick86074 жыл бұрын
I didn't realise how bad he was at the time. I had a big crush on him.🙄
@sircharlesmormont93004 жыл бұрын
I actually think Xander improves/matures a lot throughout the series. He does overcome that rejection and come to be a stalwart and true friend to Buffy and Willow. He has difficulty in finding a path forward in his life due to his lack of confidence, but he eventually overcomes that, too. He has so much potential to end up as the abusive drunk, which the series heavily implies was his home life as a child. It's even his greatest fear when marrying Anya (and exploited against him) - not that they'll be unhappy because she's a demon, but that they'll be unhappy because -he's- not good enough. But through it all, even though he's one of the only people in his peer group who has no super powers and just an average intellect, Xander becomes not a nice guy, but a good one. He -is- a mentor to Dawn, as you said. He lays it all on the line for his friends and for his community on a regular basis. He saves Willow from herself with love. It's not a possessive, creepy love. It's the real deal. With the help of Giles as his mentor and Buffy and Willow as his friends (and maybe Angel and Spike as examples of how NOT to behave), he becomes a good man. He doesn't have all of the answers and he often struggles, but I think this character development is important. Most of the "nice guys" examined in film and TV don't have time to grow up and grow out of the destructive side of the trope. Xander, thankfully, did.
@andreab3804 жыл бұрын
@@sircharlesmormont9300 Also he was better than the stereotypical guy in TV shows at the time. Some of his perceived flaws are due to the fact that we have better standards for masculinity now. But I think he paved part of the way. Just think of when he selflessly jeeps Cordelia's secret and buys her her dress anonymously.
@sofiabravo19944 жыл бұрын
I mean it’s no different from generically attractive men they don’t have to try very hard they can be the worst of the worst but will still get laid so whether they are nice or not men in general just want to have sex and will use anything to get to it and I know it sounds harsh but it’s true on the biological standpoint hormones testosterone they will use gimmicks tactics to get laid...
@MissCaraMint4 жыл бұрын
To be fair highschool is peek nice guy era for a lot of guys. Before they have learned what actual healthy relationship are, but after the hormones really kick in. To give Xander a main character through that kind of an arc ir really belivable, and kinda shows an example of healthy maturing.
@ajbasc4 жыл бұрын
"nice guys" always say girls only go after douches... honey if that was true then she'd go after you...
@danbrown13444 жыл бұрын
They do go after douches, confident douches. Being a shy guy that's also toxic is basically all of the toxic parts of masculinity with none of the good parts.
@nat20024 жыл бұрын
@@danbrown1344 lmao believe me from experience they may not have the confidence but they sure have the audacity. There's nothing at all toxic about being shy; what's toxic is trying to manipulate people into filling roles they don't want for themselves and getting upset whenever it doesn't work, whether your chosen methods are physical aggression or mind games
@franciscoancer26183 жыл бұрын
Ouch. Someone call the fire department cause that burn was hot.
@hangukhiphop3 жыл бұрын
That's right. Women don't do much of the "going after" in either case, at least not in American culture with its polarized gender roles.
@jetacysdelights26953 жыл бұрын
@@hangukhiphop most girls get humiliated by the guys they go after
@yuugarasmus35203 жыл бұрын
This is actually incredibly informative.
@swayamsiddha154 жыл бұрын
we need more people like chidi in the world. ♥️
@valenfr014 жыл бұрын
yessss
@The4820754 жыл бұрын
Do I agree or disagree with magma? Oh boy this is so hard. Just weighing the pros and cons of Chidi. It is too much. Ugh. This is agony.
@gingerkid10484 жыл бұрын
I’ll even take a few Jason Mendoza’s too...dumb as a box of rocks but sweet, pure and accepting.
@MargaritaOnTheRox4 жыл бұрын
But then nothing would get done. 😆
@beaniepq4 жыл бұрын
Bobby Ranger are you ok? Do you have a stomachache? I heard that peeps chili is good for that!
@SoulfulVeg4 жыл бұрын
I was so indoctrinated with this thinking, and it took my daughter to snap me out of it. We were watching The Notebook, and what I thought was romantic, she found to be stalking. After I considered it, she was right. I'm watching these movies with new eyes! Millenials for the win!
@mrtyrant16804 жыл бұрын
That movie disgusts me. Basically a guy does a bunch of stalker shit but gets away with it because he's attractive. If he was an average looking or below - average looking guy, she would have called the police on his ass.
@SoulfulVeg4 жыл бұрын
@@mrtyrant1680 bingo!
@stevemyopinion4234 жыл бұрын
stalking vs romantic all depond on is you like the person.
@monabohamad22424 жыл бұрын
@@SoulfulVeg oh yes "bingo" indeed since everything romantic is "toxic"/"creepy"/"stalker-y"
@monabohamad22424 жыл бұрын
more like stupidity for the win
@poweroffriendship2.04 жыл бұрын
*Fun Fact:* Titan from _Megamind_ is basically a personified version of the R/niceguy.
@happyharmony70624 жыл бұрын
F A C T S
@Persepholeigh4 жыл бұрын
My go to reference when talking about this trope.
@jaydaforbes16144 жыл бұрын
Yeah now I'm really glad that he was the villian
@literaIIyshy4 жыл бұрын
He's a grade A incel, too.
@crystaljefferphetamine4 жыл бұрын
Megamind was so ahead of its time. Truly a marvel.
@iwant2haveu4 жыл бұрын
I don’t tell my nephew he’s “soo nice omg” I tell him he’s considerate, kind, and selfless. That he deserves to stand up to himself, too. Seeing the ending gave me hope. I’ve always thought he was one in a million, and I’m glad to see it’s likely. Wish he weren’t and more guys were just kind/authentically nice.
@BlazerManiacNumber964 жыл бұрын
"the friend zone" is what happens when a guy likes a girl, but is too scared to ask her out. So instead he just befriends her in hopes one day she'll wake up and fall in love with him. And it never happens.
@mrtyrant16804 жыл бұрын
Some guys do that in order to try to win her over with other qualities like personality and stuff.
@Charlene_____4 жыл бұрын
Joshua Belmont Reese “win her over” rather than asking her out. this is what “nice guys” do. misleading someone thinking that showcasing what potentials they have under the shell and guise of a friendship will persuade the person to feel otherwise and hopefully blossom into the relationship they originally wanted, instead of being honest from the start. *really, even if you may be turned down, a great quality to have is courage.*
@mrtyrant16804 жыл бұрын
@@Charlene_____ Dude I'm below average looking so I can understand why being honest from the start is not exactly a option to some. I know it sounds shallow but honestly. being honest from the start is just a sure way to get turned down for me.
@BlazerManiacNumber964 жыл бұрын
@@mrtyrant1680 There's nothing wrong with taking it slow. But you also have to be honest. Let her know you like her. Otherwise she'll just look at you as a friend and then eventually if/when you get the courage to ask her out she'll be taken back and kind of put off. You have to set the expectation.
@mrtyrant16804 жыл бұрын
@@BlazerManiacNumber96 Honestly I started to take a passive agressive approach because most of time that made my intentions clear, I got gently turned down. This why I don't exactly judge the whole frienzone thing.
@sarakjeldsen7694 жыл бұрын
This could also be a product of "Guys like a challenge". Guys think a girl is "playing hard to get" and is "higher value" when she acts like she isn't interested, when in fact she actually isn't interested. Then when a woman is interested and actually meets him half way, she ceases to be a dream girl because she becomes "too easy". This is hardly nice.
@sarakjeldsen7694 жыл бұрын
@Nicholas Hansen If she's fit, she'd want him to be fit, too. And vice versa.
@Gaphalor4 жыл бұрын
@Nicholas Hansen okay? Because physical attraction is everything one can bring to the table? Maybe you are superficial!
@Gaphalor4 жыл бұрын
@Nicholas Hansen ehhm no, ever heard of resources, social status, confidence etc? The best looking bird is worthless if he cant build a nest, and the bestlooking lion is also worthless if he is a bad hunter and cant feed his family.
@SirThinks2Much4 жыл бұрын
@Nicholas Hansen Are you a bird, then? Consider dating fellow avians.
@MZB804 жыл бұрын
@Nicholas Hansen I'd say if they're both fit and built, it's likely that they share an interest in fitness, exercise, food and habits. they are more likely to want to get up at the same time, do similar things and eat similar foods leading to a good, harmonious relationship. if one person is into all of those things, but the other couldn't give a toss and they don't have much in common - there's going to be issues. Conversely, 'attractive' varies from person to person. I don't consider myself attractive, esp after 3 children (!) my modelling days are looong gone, but my husband thinks I'm beautiful - and it goes both ways. He's not model material, but I think he's gorgeous. What really seals it, though, is that we're both hardcore gamers who love motorbikes and rockclimbing, have wicked senses of humour and adore good food and wine. You can't fake that.
@wavyiann97884 жыл бұрын
Nice guys aren’t nice, the fact people still call them “nice” is disrespectful to actual nice guys
@meep92314 жыл бұрын
THANK YOU! PREACH! this is almost kinda like the Gryffindor house tbh, while most people see them as glory seeking asshats when in fact some of them are actually doing the right thing for the right reasons.
@mewexum75544 жыл бұрын
@@meep9231 As a Gryffindor who is hardly interested in the notion of sex. I wholeheartedly agree with this statement
@meep92314 жыл бұрын
Mia yeah man, they need to be called something else like dementors or something better yet, just call the actual nice guys hufflepuff and gryffindors
@meep92314 жыл бұрын
Mia thanks
@danishbutter18474 жыл бұрын
back in the old days they called actual gentlemen
@samanthadonjuan94833 жыл бұрын
I really like "You" because we can see in a deeper and creepier way what goes on in the minds of this type of people, the scariest thing for me was that I even found myself agreeing with him, it was a constant struggle to remind myself what he is and what he does. If that happens with an audience just watching, it's not hard to understand why these guys are so convinced they are in the right.
@shaunm63834 жыл бұрын
Finally, The Take is doing some guy tropes. When will they do the bad boy, or the nerd?
@trinaq4 жыл бұрын
Yep, I hope that they take on the Bad Boy, especially why many stories seem to romantize his behaviour towards a Good Girl, such as in Twilight or Fifty Shades! 🖤
@timothyo7184 жыл бұрын
Shaun M Yes I am pleased about this. Definitely should do the bad boy trope, nerd as well as stuff like the tough short guy trope, friendly giant trope, token black guy, etc.
@PrincessLioness4 жыл бұрын
Timothy O I feel the token black guy is applicable both genders.
@franziska92604 жыл бұрын
I'd like one on the Bad Boy, dam, I'd love if they could bring some nuance to it rather than just saying all bad boys are shit, because some of them are, some of them aren't, because of how broad a stereotype the bad boy can cover
@KW-vy1rf4 жыл бұрын
I'm sure they'll address all those tropes in time.
@jean-lucm91154 жыл бұрын
This kinda hit home pretty hard for me. The "nice guy" has lot of the character traits that I spent along time trying to get over in myself. For most of my romantic relationships I was with people who were from broken homes or deeply self conscious and depressed because I would tell myself that I could help fix them and grow as a person with them. When in reality I was with them because I could see myself as the one who didn't need to change or grow, I wasn't the one who needed to look inward. When it came down to it I probably hurt these people alot more than I help
@qwertdwlrma4 жыл бұрын
Jean-Luc M Thank you for sharing your story man
@haveagoodday6294 жыл бұрын
Jean-Luc M What a mature realization! I have a lot to learn from you 🙂
@gracehooper12354 жыл бұрын
Oooh I’m a girl and I’ve seen that with myself in toxic friendships
@lucasdarianschwendlervieir37144 жыл бұрын
Good luck man!
@katyt74704 жыл бұрын
Good for you for realizing and being honest with yourself. It's never too late to change and grow.
@KindredKeepsake4 жыл бұрын
Hal from Megamind is another infamous "Nice Guy"--gone horribly, horribly wrong~!
@FiresideBoomer4 жыл бұрын
Similarly, Megamind himself is it done correctly
@Hazyla4 жыл бұрын
KindredKeepsake Hal. Is. An. INCEL.
@KindredKeepsake4 жыл бұрын
ᎷᎾᎾNᏔᎾᏞF ᎠᎡᎪᏔᏚ They're the same, if you think about it~ Both incels and "Nice Guys" blame women for their lack of relationships, societal problems, poor self-worth, and lack of compensation for their "great personalities"--when the reality is that they are walking, talking garbage; and that the women are better off without 'em.
@KindredKeepsake4 жыл бұрын
FiresideBoomer You have a point, actually~ For most of his life, he wanted to kidnap Roxanne just to bait Metroman into more battles. It could have been a sick take on the "get the girl" trope, but it didn't go that far. It wasn't romantic at that point, but he was still actively pursuing her for his own personal gain. After the Bernard incident, he began to get to know her as a person--and started to think less of her as a tool. The drawback is that he lied to her for gosh knows how long. Worse, Hal was brainwashed into the whole "get the girl" trope as well, except he became violent when this was not successful. Roxanne was justifiably angry with both men, of course. Thankfully, Megamind didn't blame Roxanne for the relationship flop, nor lash out at her like some "Nice Guys" do--namely, Hal. Eventually, he took her "You judge them based on their actions" advice to heart, saving the city. By the end, Megamind did it as himself--without neither false pretenses, nor ulterior motives.
@cristalido36404 жыл бұрын
@@KindredKeepsake calling them "walking, talking garbage" doesn't make you much better as a person... remember incels are are just people facing huge personal issues and they need help, not to get told "women are better off without you" which in this context sounds the same as "kill yourself, your existence is worthless".
@Joe_Parmesan2 жыл бұрын
I found myself slipping down that Nice Guy slope for a bit in my early 20's. The whole situation was a bit complicated though, but eventually I needed to look at actions (both mine and hers) instead of just relying words, especially hearsay from other people. In the end, I took a step back and am trying to work on improving myself. And, I'm not mad at the girl for not wanting to be with me at the time. In fact, I'm actually fairly glad, because I don't think I would've been a good boyfriend (unresolved issues effecting mental health, lack of knowledge about how to live, lack of skills, etc.), and I've grown as a person and am continuing on with more growth.
@cgortz892 жыл бұрын
Interesting to hear a personal experience and glad to hear a positive example!
@MichellaneousMe4 жыл бұрын
It’s not “nice guys that finish last” It’s “real nice guys finish first” I couldn’t agree more with that line!
@niamhiebeanie86614 жыл бұрын
Exactly, "nice guys" can only "finish last" if they see women as a finish line.
@ShaudaySmith4 жыл бұрын
or an uninterested woman, really.
@zaza-ik5ws4 жыл бұрын
Genuinely nice guys finish first. But unfortunately most people cannot be genuinely nice
@meep92314 жыл бұрын
@@zaza-ik5ws it's the same thing as having friends. "nice guys" only see them as gullible pawns instead of people. Also tbh having friends and romantic relationships are privileges, the only problem is that some people can't seem to know how to earn it
@mrtyrant16804 жыл бұрын
B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
@carolinesalv4 жыл бұрын
Here's a painful truth these so called "nice guys" would be shocked learn..not only can you NOT "will" a woman into having feelings for you but the harder you try to pursue her the more repulsed she'll become by you, she may even come to HATE you! Which is a worse position to be in from before you started..take it from a woman who's been through this crap several times!
@Anna-po2tl4 жыл бұрын
same
@amazingbro67234 жыл бұрын
This deserves more likes
@hangukhiphop3 жыл бұрын
Yep. Attraction is not a meritocracy.
@stevemyopinion4233 жыл бұрын
the problem is ALL most NONE of the guy on the list do that, they ask the girl out, or just there friend BUT TED and ROSS the women they like WENT after them. BUT people acted like the guys chase the women , they did not.
@swayamsiddha154 жыл бұрын
i’m loving the trope, explained series.
@cutthroat3993 жыл бұрын
Funny thing is, when I was in college focusing on myself and working on me as a person. This super beautiful and upbeat lady walked up to me and asked me to get dinner with her. Two years later, I now call her my fiance. Moral of the story: focus on improving yourself and everything else will fall into place.
@soggymoustache85152 жыл бұрын
Does she also call you her fiancee or is this like a one-sided thing?
@avinashreji606 ай бұрын
was she a random girl, because most girls wouldn't appreciate it if a random guy just asked to get dinner out of the blue