Indiana Jones 5 is a modern masterpiece

  Рет қаралды 175,628

The Woke Critic

The Woke Critic

Күн бұрын

Пікірлер
@konrad94886
@konrad94886 Жыл бұрын
The funny thing is that women don't even actually go watch these "modern strong women" movies. In the end, a movie made for no one will make no money. Why is this so hard to understand.
@FUh_Que_-
@FUh_Que_- Жыл бұрын
It's Not About Money, It's About Sending A Message
@jeremytitus9519
@jeremytitus9519 Жыл бұрын
@@FUh_Que_- *ignites gigantic stack of classic films*
@FUh_Que_-
@FUh_Que_- Жыл бұрын
@@jeremytitus9519 Perfect lol
@chrodegang8406
@chrodegang8406 Жыл бұрын
@@FUh_Que_- yep it's called propaganda
@Rob8729
@Rob8729 Жыл бұрын
yup...Just like the WNBA.
@mbag012
@mbag012 Жыл бұрын
You know it's actually truly shocking how they killed off his son just so PWB can step in. It's like a post-birth abortion
@silverstarlight9395
@silverstarlight9395 Жыл бұрын
It's explained in the movie that he died while fighting for his country. His death gave indy some much needed conflict and character development.
@whenpigsfly8178
@whenpigsfly8178 Жыл бұрын
@@silverstarlight9395 Or they just hated Shia LaBeouf.
@WaterFaucet24
@WaterFaucet24 Жыл бұрын
@@whenpigsfly8178or they wanted to pass the fedora/whip to a woman. Because women are better than men in every way.
@stephenh5944
@stephenh5944 Жыл бұрын
@@whenpigsfly8178 - Hollywood superstar Shia LaBeouf?
@TeacherDoug7
@TeacherDoug7 Жыл бұрын
@@silverstarlight9395 Indiana Jones doesn't need character development. He just needs his next maguffin.
@NANA-qd8wz
@NANA-qd8wz Жыл бұрын
The Last Crusade ended so perfectly. Sometimes less is more.
@petrasheane5358
@petrasheane5358 Жыл бұрын
That's when the franchise truly ended for me. The other two movies are just fanfiction
@imgvillasrc1608
@imgvillasrc1608 11 ай бұрын
I really wanted a film with Islamic symobolism though to finish the Abrahamic religions. We already got Jewish (Raiders of the Lost Ark) and Christian (The Last Crusade) symbolism.
@oliverjenner9251
@oliverjenner9251 11 ай бұрын
@@imgvillasrc1608that is a real interesting idea that I would have liked to see, unfortunately I don’t think modern Hollywood would be able to pull it off so it’ll just stay a cool idea
@thecensoredmuscle563
@thecensoredmuscle563 10 ай бұрын
​@imgvillasrc1608 Indiana Jones and the explosion of jihadists. In the end they all get blown up..
@rogerruhland8897
@rogerruhland8897 Жыл бұрын
KK’s team should from this point on be known as “The Demolition Team”. Her ability to take iconic franchises and crumble them into dust is epic.
@FirstLast-vr7es
@FirstLast-vr7es Жыл бұрын
I refuse to support terrible movies financially. It's called "capitalism."
@sky0kast0
@sky0kast0 Жыл бұрын
I'd only cap em in the neck
@the_absurd_hero
@the_absurd_hero Жыл бұрын
Nice
@Zodroo_Tint
@Zodroo_Tint Жыл бұрын
No, it is called choice. Capitalism is what brought to you Indiana Jones 5, the Rings of Power and the Disney Star Wars. Now keep worshipping it!
@QueenAleenaFan
@QueenAleenaFan Жыл бұрын
No capitalism would incentivize them to make good products as cheaply as possible to make more money, Rather than making bad products for the highest cost possible
@sarl2121
@sarl2121 Жыл бұрын
@@Zodroo_Tint German poet Heinrich Heine had two very good friends in the years he lived in Paris. He wrote often about them both. One was James de Rothschild, one of the richest men in the world, the other was a young Karl Marx. Marx was also, coincidentally, related to the wife of James de Rothschild's sister-in-law and obviously her children by her husband Nathan Rothschild. Their oldest son, Lionel de Rothschild, was the first Jewish man to be elected to the House of Commons. Marx once spent a few hours in the public gallery of the House of Commons observing Lionel and wrote about it in his American newspaper column. He didn't mention that Lionel's great-grand parents were also his great-great-grandparents. That's Oligarchy communism for you. Keep worshipping it.
@Palidyn1
@Palidyn1 Жыл бұрын
Congrats to Kathline Kennedy for taking Billion Dollar Intellectual properties and shepherding them to the level of interest, excitement and profitability of the WNBA!
@daymenleo6895
@daymenleo6895 Жыл бұрын
hell na!! it ain't over they'll be a Indiana Jones the search for the lost dinosaur with a CGI generated actor long after Harrison Ford dies of old age😵🤑
@RichardBenoit-q4z
@RichardBenoit-q4z Жыл бұрын
No, the WNBA is half way watchable. (Just remind yourself that they are supposed to play at half power compared to the NBA.) You can't make through more than 15 minutes of anything connected to Kathleen Kennedy without getting sick.
@razor6552
@razor6552 Жыл бұрын
How do you wind up with millions of dollars in the movie business? Turn over a billion dollar franchise to KK.
@RichardBenoit-q4z
@RichardBenoit-q4z Жыл бұрын
@@razor6552 Perfectly stated.
@ViperAceFilms
@ViperAceFilms Жыл бұрын
@@daymenleo6895 I think indy has become the dinosaur
@oatfarmer6501
@oatfarmer6501 Жыл бұрын
This channel’s satire is top notch.
@DomPatek
@DomPatek Жыл бұрын
Say what you want about the Crystal Skull, but seeing Indy and Marion smiling in front of the altar almost brings a tear to my eye.
@ml5955
@ml5955 Жыл бұрын
Crystal Skull certainly did have some redeeming value, and it did not try to destroy Indie with intersectional feminism. I’d watch Crystal Skull over this leftist propaganda reel.
@journeymanX
@journeymanX Жыл бұрын
Not to mention he takes the hat away from mutt before the kid puts it on
@warrenhammer7262
@warrenhammer7262 Жыл бұрын
Crystal Skull had some good ideas thrown in, his relationship with son was a lot of fun, different antagonists (USSR as opposed to Nazi's), cold war dynamic Oh yeah, they destroyed all of those things in this movie
@DerHammerSpricht
@DerHammerSpricht Жыл бұрын
@@ml5955 The main thing people hated about Crystal Skull at the time was the Ancient Aliens stuff, which, in 2023, has aged like a particularly fine wine. That movie also was not a passive-aggressive pseudo-feminist slander piece, and those kinds of movies ALREADY have aged like milk.
@ml5955
@ml5955 Жыл бұрын
@@DerHammerSpricht agreed 👍
@greyman1104
@greyman1104 Жыл бұрын
A bad movie at least leads to fun reviews 🥳
@saladdays180s9
@saladdays180s9 Жыл бұрын
Here's mine: See Indy 5 where Lia Thomas plays the character of Phoebe-Waller Bridge, an angry bitter spiteful bigoted passive aggressive feminist.
@jamesprince8278
@jamesprince8278 Жыл бұрын
Good movie lots of action
@daveroche6522
@daveroche6522 Жыл бұрын
Raiders: (still) awesome, Temple: ho-hum, Last Crusade: also awesome (including the script for 'Dildo of Dumb' shooting out the east ends of the westbound horses), Skull of Bull: dull, This one: the Star Trek V of this franchise - crappy story, 1-dimensional characters, pointless/stupid dialogue, wooden 'acting', appalling/cheapo - very cheapo - CGI/FX, total - TOTAL - contempt for fans. But APART from all that, what's not to love?
@mashrafi157
@mashrafi157 Жыл бұрын
The thing is nowadays its just all fun reviews and no good movies
@insertnamehere5809
@insertnamehere5809 Жыл бұрын
That's why I want KK to stay forever, because her failures are hilarious 🤣
@truegreenbeard7874
@truegreenbeard7874 Жыл бұрын
Imagine how awesome this could have been if Short Round came back and became Indie's Successor. I would have effing cried.
@jimmyboy131
@jimmyboy131 Жыл бұрын
I would have been on board with that idea. Actually sounds like it could be a fun series of movies.
@parapendejadas4913
@parapendejadas4913 Жыл бұрын
Disney/Lucasfilm strategy: 1. Run down the main old character and make him a sore drunk angry looser that wants to die. 2. Introduce the young feminist Mary Sue annoying character. 3. Despite of billions in the bank, make horrible work with CGI. 4. Expect success. 5. Movie flops ...
@JimTheKnight01
@JimTheKnight01 Жыл бұрын
6. Feminist shit director blames movie's fail on men.
@davideassis87
@davideassis87 Жыл бұрын
6. Blames the Phobe-Ist White Straight Audience
@Tallorian
@Tallorian Жыл бұрын
Hopefully, those billions in the bank are not there for long. With this kind of production.
@tc98826
@tc98826 Жыл бұрын
Last Jedi is different. Luke was never going to be the main character. Yes he starts off reclusive but thats required for the plot. He feels guilt, is reluctant to get involved, and then redeems himself. He wasnt emasculated or made to look feeble, just grouchy.
@jfkassnation5980
@jfkassnation5980 Жыл бұрын
@@davideassis87 7. Have conniptions
@db5627
@db5627 Жыл бұрын
What a shame. If only there was a director who would speak out about these studios' bleeding characters and franchises dry. If only.
@moy_moy85
@moy_moy85 Жыл бұрын
Well, Stephen Spielberg was meant to direct but gave the job away apparently to "pass the baton on". What is less known is the years of arguing with Disney over the script. The dude had the perfect opportunity to make a stand but took the cowards way out likely for fear of being cancelled.
@wilfredoUbatuba
@wilfredoUbatuba Жыл бұрын
it would take balls
@daveroche6522
@daveroche6522 Жыл бұрын
"Meanwhile, in a perpendicular universe - far, far - VERY, VERY - far, far away, one such director...........".
@Ryanlexz
@Ryanlexz Жыл бұрын
Masterpiece while it flop on box office. Oh wait! This channel didn't want to mention that 😂😂😂
@yakivpopavich
@yakivpopavich Жыл бұрын
There's nothing a man loves more than seeing his once beloved heroes grow old, feeble and useless. Having them also be beat and and their heroic and adventurous role being taken over by a woman. So brave, so stunning. Having a male hero phased out and replaced by a woman truly is a noble cause for a modern audience. We can only hope we see a female James Bond series next.
@georgerafa5041
@georgerafa5041 Жыл бұрын
they actually tried making 007 a black woman lmao
@sarge1231
@sarge1231 Жыл бұрын
Bull, they should have had Dylan Mulvaney in the role....if they want to get woke, don't half ass it.
@davidtaylor5204
@davidtaylor5204 Жыл бұрын
A lesbian of color and the olive in the martini has to be organically grown and documented harvested by unionized pickers.
@fmilan1
@fmilan1 Жыл бұрын
Yeah, a black women -- father muslin, mother Jewish -- non-binary, transgender, body fat affirmative disabled 007. It sure going to be a sight to see. If not as a spy movie, for sure as a trash comedy movie.
@thesupplement
@thesupplement Жыл бұрын
But you will see a female 007. I mean, didn't you see the last 007 film? 🙂
@Rizzo2185
@Rizzo2185 Жыл бұрын
The part where PWB casually won the UFC men’s championship and then went on to defeat the Klingons for intergalactic supremacy brought me to tears! 6 out of 5 stars!!!
@the_absurd_hero
@the_absurd_hero Жыл бұрын
I’d pay real money to watch PWB step into the ring with any UFC men’s champion. Maybe then she’ll learn that she can’t just take things that men have worked hard for.
@l_ifeefi_l1998
@l_ifeefi_l1998 Жыл бұрын
We need a cross over collaboration of all the mary sues in one movie!! I cant wait to watch them bickering with one another
@shadf7902
@shadf7902 Жыл бұрын
@@the_absurd_hero that would be funny, and the shortest match in the history of ufc.
@zamar2158
@zamar2158 Жыл бұрын
​@@l_ifeefi_l1998 this is a great idea - all the Mary sues together. But not done by today's Hollywood. In an irreverent Mel brooks funny taking-the-piss way. It would be the runaway hit of the decade.
@nofutureproductions9242
@nofutureproductions9242 Жыл бұрын
P'TAK! Chic-fil-A!
@ncthriller4465
@ncthriller4465 Жыл бұрын
Old possum face KK has really solidified her legacy. Its so brave and stunning that someone with such a debilitating mental disability has managed to do what shes done. And nobody has even tried to stop her!
@shadf7902
@shadf7902 Жыл бұрын
Disneys overfilled with incompetence.
@milzmagnetic8225
@milzmagnetic8225 Жыл бұрын
SMH. Now I can’t Unsee her without a Possum Face. Thanks 👍🏽
@j-lgroen1239
@j-lgroen1239 Жыл бұрын
Nobody has tried to stop her because she’s a disabled person. You can’t question whether she can do the job, that’s inappropriate!
@jeffreylieberman1668
@jeffreylieberman1668 Жыл бұрын
Or how about the fact that the black woman is movie called the star of this entire movie of cracker? She deserves to be stoned to death in real life for that.
@chilliconn071
@chilliconn071 Жыл бұрын
I'll bet some people have tried to say this/that is a bad idea. Next thing they're clearing their office/desk and taking their stuff home in a cardboard box.
@alantasman8273
@alantasman8273 Жыл бұрын
This should have been named "Indiana Jones and the Last Pay Check". Harrison Ford's last flip off of his fans and character..for the money. Sort of like what he did in his last Star Wars outing
@DerHammerSpricht
@DerHammerSpricht Жыл бұрын
At least we got Deckard punching Ryan Gosling in the face repeatedly before sharing a whiskey with him and reminiscing about lost love, and toasted cheese. Fuck I think I'll rewatch that tonight actually. Best opening scene of any movie this millenium
@JMARTIN1947
@JMARTIN1947 Жыл бұрын
Harrison Ford was so good looking in American Graffiti. Now, decades later, he's a mega-rich 80-year old who can barely stand his fans, is a douchebag when he's on talk shows, and phones in all his performances.
@csh5414
@csh5414 4 ай бұрын
@@DerHammerSpricht Great film, like the first was.
@alessandrotrucchi8338
@alessandrotrucchi8338 Жыл бұрын
"It seems the Romans would have also won World War II, in half a day" As an Italian I found that painfully ironic 😅
@AwakenedAvocado
@AwakenedAvocado Жыл бұрын
As an italian who enjoys pineapple on pizza, i juust have to say that thank you to romans for inventing the tomato base sauce of the pizza without this the consistency and flavourful sweetness of the pineapple will be too much👌
@gridley
@gridley Жыл бұрын
Moreover, ancient Romans were so advanced & sophisticated, the sight of an airplane in the sky would have been no BFD to them. Yah, ancient Romans!
@Zodroo_Tint
@Zodroo_Tint Жыл бұрын
@@gridley Because they were led by strong independent black female emperors. Everybody know this is the real truth.
@BigNews2021
@BigNews2021 Жыл бұрын
@@AwakenedAvocado - Alternate history is fun when we have Romans inventing a sauce over 1000 years before the main ingredient, the tomato, was introduced to Europe.
@AwakenedAvocado
@AwakenedAvocado Жыл бұрын
@@BigNews2021 yeah well next thing you'll be telling me is pineapple was invented by Hawaii
@bryguysays2948
@bryguysays2948 Жыл бұрын
One good thing about the new Indy movie is it makes I.J. Crystal Skull look like an absolute epic masterpiece.
@czowiekoowek7708
@czowiekoowek7708 Жыл бұрын
true, compared to time travel bullshit, refrigator scene from crystal skull is amazing and unforgetable and the aliens are much more thrilling concept than going back in time to kill hitler lol, not to mention the female antagonist of the crystal skull which is one of if not the best villain of the indiana jones series
@snowangelnc
@snowangelnc Жыл бұрын
I wouldn't call Crystal Skull a great movie, but I never thought it was terrible either. In a way it's like comparing the three Star Wars prequels George Lucas made to the stuff that Disney's been putting out. Crystal Skull and the Star Wars prequels felt like the high school teacher giving a C-minus or a D-plus to the kid that's usually at the top of the class. "Look, this is still passing work, and coming from some of your peers this would be acceptable. But I've seen what you've been able to do in the past, and I know you are capable of producing work that's so much better than this. What happened?"
@ThePatank
@ThePatank Жыл бұрын
@@czowiekoowek7708 funnily enough everything that had to do with time travel was by far the best part of DoD
@htown11465
@htown11465 Жыл бұрын
Do you really think that? Indy 5 has a lot of flaws but it’s objectively infinitely better than crystal skull
@Brendan.Day76
@Brendan.Day76 Жыл бұрын
Women ruining another franchise
@AvesPasseri-Jinysvet
@AvesPasseri-Jinysvet Жыл бұрын
Actually, I was still waiting for Helena to be eaten by some crocodile as the right villain full of hybris and greed. She totally fit the idea of an antagonist about to get its just reward. And Indie winning the artifact back... and putting it in a museum. But at the end.... wow... a really modern take on the Indie stories. Wow.
@shadf7902
@shadf7902 Жыл бұрын
Its 2023, why is anyone expecting anything from disney to be watchable and worth a dime?
@sardomarcrowe5723
@sardomarcrowe5723 Жыл бұрын
She should have died like the blonde Nazi from Last Crusade
@Ryanlexz
@Ryanlexz Жыл бұрын
Masterpiece while it flop on box office. Oh wait! This channel didn't want to mention that 😂😂😂
@spencerreid2086
@spencerreid2086 Жыл бұрын
@@Ryanlexz you realise this video is ironic right?
@Ryanlexz
@Ryanlexz Жыл бұрын
@@spencerreid2086 like I said! It hard to tell tho
@gzwz12
@gzwz12 Жыл бұрын
I loved the part of Indy 5 where bill says to ted, "no way".
@KaosNova2
@KaosNova2 Жыл бұрын
Thank Bill and Ted for warning me! Bill and Ted were the best! #kaosnova
@billmayo1094
@billmayo1094 Жыл бұрын
Dude!!
@razor6552
@razor6552 Жыл бұрын
They both look at Helena and say "Bogus!" Then Jane Wiedlin kicks her sorry butt as Joan of Arc.
@jimmyboy131
@jimmyboy131 Жыл бұрын
We totally need Rufus to show up in a phone booth and take us out of this particular clown dimension we're living in.
@Ryanlexz
@Ryanlexz Жыл бұрын
Masterpiece while it flop on box office. Oh wait! This channel didn't want to mention that 😂😂😂
@TheIceMan23
@TheIceMan23 Жыл бұрын
I loved the part in Indy 5 where PWB says "only I can prevent forest fires".
@gpg9516
@gpg9516 Жыл бұрын
If only it could make itself attractive. Wait, she’s straight?
@AwakenedAvocado
@AwakenedAvocado Жыл бұрын
Greta thinberg is our only hope
@grkpektis
@grkpektis Жыл бұрын
When the black female CIA agent came on screen I thought "oh no this is a charismatic character that respects Indy that makes her so boring". I am so glad they killed her off so we can spend more time with Fleabag Karen who is not annoying at all
@protorhinocerator142
@protorhinocerator142 Жыл бұрын
I liked how at the end, Morbius said, "It's definitely not Morbin' time."
@gzwz12
@gzwz12 Жыл бұрын
I loved the ending where Jordan steps back and swishes the jumper to win the game.
@caligulapontifex5759
@caligulapontifex5759 Жыл бұрын
I mean couldn’t Harrison Ford see what was happening during the filming? Didn’t he see what they were doing to this beloved character beyond his paycheque? He could’ve stepped in anytime during the process and say "I’m not having it". He has the clout and changes would have happened. Sad to say, but he’s as much to blame for this as Kathleen Kennedy.
@TheSuperappelflap
@TheSuperappelflap Жыл бұрын
Remember that time they interviewed Ford about the new Star Wars movies and asked him what he thought, he just grinned and said "I got paid". Pepperidge Farm remembers.
@TheHelado36
@TheHelado36 Жыл бұрын
I ask myself the same thing, also with Mark Hamil ! The just wanted the money !
@kingcosworth2643
@kingcosworth2643 11 ай бұрын
99% of people are not the least bit passionate about their job, it's a means to an end. Harrison Ford is not interested.
@csh5414
@csh5414 4 ай бұрын
All he could see was $$$$
@davideassis87
@davideassis87 Жыл бұрын
Why Indiana Jones when we can have Vagiana Joana? It's 2023, peeps.
@UncleJim69420
@UncleJim69420 Жыл бұрын
Phoebe Waller-Bridge's forehead is so big they could project movies on it.
@gorhor9006
@gorhor9006 Жыл бұрын
The death of modern Cinema in real time.
@arizona_anime_fan
@arizona_anime_fan Жыл бұрын
my favorite part was when after fleebag knocked out indiana jones, indiana hands her his hat and says, the hat is perfect, and fleebag looks at the old hat in disgust and says "it will be when it fits a woman" and Marion divorces indiana and runs off with fleebag. i teared up as everyone in the theater stood in applause. so stunning and brave.
@razor6552
@razor6552 Жыл бұрын
😂😅😂
@superniqqa991
@superniqqa991 Жыл бұрын
I love when the Nazi said fuck niggers to the cia 🤣
@infinitydreamzz
@infinitydreamzz Жыл бұрын
😂 *spoiler alert* the actual movie is not too much different: a smug condescending annoying masculine woman who is better at being a man than men and better at being Indiana Jones than Indiana Jones sucker punches Indy so hard he loses his consciousness because she knows what is good for him better than he does and when he wakes up old and confused she is there gloating for being so very smart. The end. Yikes 😬
@Ryanlexz
@Ryanlexz Жыл бұрын
Masterpiece while it flop on box office. Oh wait! This channel didn't want to mention that 😂😂😂
@trafficcone
@trafficcone Жыл бұрын
Should have stopped at The Last Crusade. One of the best.
@ARCtrooper_bliz525
@ARCtrooper_bliz525 3 ай бұрын
Thats why it was named the last crusade there wasn’t plans to make another one but disney just like starwars saw 🤑🤑🤑🤑 and in the process ruined both franchises
@TheClassicalSauce
@TheClassicalSauce Жыл бұрын
I am 45 years old. Indy was my childhood, my favorite hero, even a role model. This a movie I should be dying to see and I don’t even care that you spoiled it.
@MrFrateTrane
@MrFrateTrane Жыл бұрын
I love the part where the Girl Hero accidentally finds the important relic in the ladies room while comforting another Girl Hero who's experiencing relationship issues. That was fricking awesome. Instant classic.
@Zodroo_Tint
@Zodroo_Tint Жыл бұрын
I didn't saw that. As a men I know I can't look the film where there is a ladies room in the picture, I don't want my toxic masculinity to spoil that beautifull independent shiting room.
@protorhinocerator142
@protorhinocerator142 Жыл бұрын
Same plot as She-Hulk.
@wellhungindung
@wellhungindung Жыл бұрын
Ladies room!? Repent, you bigot. I have reported you to HR.
@BlackSailPass_GuitarCovers
@BlackSailPass_GuitarCovers Жыл бұрын
Is this satire or did it actually happen in the film? I can't even tell anymore.
@phoradio1277
@phoradio1277 Жыл бұрын
​@@BlackSailPass_GuitarCoversYou can't tell anymore............. I'm sitting here trying to figure out if this is willful destruction for a tax write off😂
@Mitchcraft.
@Mitchcraft. Жыл бұрын
I look forward to seeing just how many people still think this is a real review channel and the satire goes right over their heads 😂
@TheGreatApostate
@TheGreatApostate Жыл бұрын
I can't wait to take my family to watch this again and again. I will not be satisfied until my daughter can recipt the script word for word.
@ryleighloughty3307
@ryleighloughty3307 Жыл бұрын
'recite'.
@kfam9719
@kfam9719 Жыл бұрын
.......did your daughter commit 1st degree murder? Because that is some punishment
@TheGreatApostate
@TheGreatApostate Жыл бұрын
@@ryleighloughty3307 I knew it was wrong but as a far left activist I blame structural racism for my error.
@michaelleitner1245
@michaelleitner1245 Жыл бұрын
@@TheGreatApostate It's not your fault. The system has let you down.
@NKA23
@NKA23 Жыл бұрын
What has your daughter done to deserve such a harsh punishment? Do you hate her so much? Also, how will it help your daughter in live to be able to recite the worst entry in the Indiana Jones franchise?
@emmanuelarthur_
@emmanuelarthur_ Жыл бұрын
As long as the Lucas Film exists Woke Critic will never run out of content
@michaelreich4827
@michaelreich4827 Жыл бұрын
The Dial of Misandry
@AwakenedAvocado
@AwakenedAvocado Жыл бұрын
I embrace my toxic masculinity in all its glorious magnificience. I bathe in its majestic prowess and revel in its beautiful elegance.
@arks_knights
@arks_knights Жыл бұрын
This is a master piece if you ever want to destroy your franchise
@metalrules1135
@metalrules1135 Жыл бұрын
So glad to hear this movie is everything I thought it would be.
@omnistarch4778
@omnistarch4778 Жыл бұрын
Yep it sure is a real steaming pile of shit.
@tobyonatabe2601
@tobyonatabe2601 Жыл бұрын
It is so much more than that. You do realize that this guy would write the same review if he hadn’t watched the film right? Because it certainly seems like it.
@metalrules1135
@metalrules1135 Жыл бұрын
@@tobyonatabe2601 Anytime I see the phrase, "You do realize" I immediately dismiss anything that follows. A phrase used by shills and haters everywhere.
@tobyonatabe2601
@tobyonatabe2601 Жыл бұрын
@@metalrules1135 if you ever grow up to be able to read an opinion that you don't like, I'm here.
@metalrules1135
@metalrules1135 Жыл бұрын
@@tobyonatabe2601 You troll a page whose opinions you disagree with trying to look cool. When you grow up and quit been a loser looking for action on the internet, let me know. Your trolling game sucks too. Nothing I haven't seen before. Try to be original.
@ferchorps2224
@ferchorps2224 Жыл бұрын
The snap finger of kk-thanos the 5th movie is 💩🧻🚽
@scottmcfadyen293
@scottmcfadyen293 Жыл бұрын
Alternate title : Horse Face and the Destiny to Lose 500 Million Dollars !
@damienruzco
@damienruzco Жыл бұрын
You know it’s not a good sign if woke critic is the first YT review notification you get for a new movie and that just came out
@TheChurlishBoor
@TheChurlishBoor Жыл бұрын
I couldn't imagine ever sitting down to watch this "movie", so thank you for taking us through it on our behalf. Indy's knock-kneed geriatric escapades in that skull thingy was more than enough for me.
@VanHoutenMC
@VanHoutenMC Жыл бұрын
Why not watch it yourself? I saw it today and thought it was great, and I’m an Indy super fan. Don’t be a sheep blindly listening to random KZbinrs and go make your own decision.
@davidgifford8112
@davidgifford8112 Жыл бұрын
@@VanHoutenMCI guess you must be the modern audience Disney has been talking about. I’m beside myself with joy you are out there. I’m not modern, have a liking for character arks, novel ideas, well crafted story telling and a dislike of endless sequels squeezing every last dollar out of worn out franchises due to catastrophic imagination failures the current movie industry. Paint me 20th century, I’m fine with that!
@inigo5051
@inigo5051 Жыл бұрын
​@@VanHoutenMC are you non binary?
@Jaytee.
@Jaytee. Жыл бұрын
@@VanHoutenMC I agree with you. I've seen it and I really enjoyed it. It's like the person narrating this video watched a different movie from me.
@VanHoutenMC
@VanHoutenMC Жыл бұрын
@@inigo5051 What a stupid question. No.
@zmack862
@zmack862 Жыл бұрын
It's like it's written by someone who always loses an argument and resorts to personal attacks and that is still upset about something that happened in primary school.
@mattcolver1
@mattcolver1 Жыл бұрын
I'm so glad they updated Indiana Jones for "Modern Audiences". Since I'm a fossil, I'll sit this one out.
@DerHammerSpricht
@DerHammerSpricht Жыл бұрын
"Boy you said it, Chewie. Where did you dig up that old *fossil* ?"
@randysiordia
@randysiordia Жыл бұрын
Your inflections and cadence the these reviews are fantastic!
@juanjoseleonvarea2495
@juanjoseleonvarea2495 Жыл бұрын
You made a small mistake in the video when you said "in the first four movies, the hero of the Indiana Jones franchise was Indiana Jones." There are only 3.
@alyu6351
@alyu6351 Жыл бұрын
Next film Indiana meets his black grandsomething
@geggy310
@geggy310 Жыл бұрын
Best joke I’ve heard all year
@ReinoldFZ
@ReinoldFZ Жыл бұрын
"She is always right" sigh, that and the anti-capitalist message, what Disney Lucasfilm already did in like The Last Jedi, makes me think they interpret movie tickets as micro-aggressions :T So I send a thanks instead to you for sharing with us the wisdom of Disney in an entertaining way 😋 Peruvian greetings : )
@NathanWind99
@NathanWind99 Жыл бұрын
Hilarious parody review. I know it's a parody because surely they wouldn't destroy the legacy of an iconic screen hero like Indy, right? That reminds me, I still need to get around to seeing the last couple of Star Wars movies. I can't wait to see how Luke Skywalker aged into becoming a master Jedi.
@AwakenedAvocado
@AwakenedAvocado Жыл бұрын
I embrace my toxic masculinity in all its glorious magnificience. I bathe in its majestic prowess and revel in its beautiful elegance.
@pauldonvito6169
@pauldonvito6169 Жыл бұрын
Oh, erm.. take a seat.. we need to talk..
@raghulravichandran4231
@raghulravichandran4231 Жыл бұрын
0:40 if you don't hear critical drinker , we cant be friends
@georgehouliaras7239
@georgehouliaras7239 Жыл бұрын
A movie of movies indeed. 10/10 The Message, 0/10 Entertainment just like all modern movies should be. Bravo to Disney for another masterpiece for our noble D.I.E.(Diversity Inclusion and Equity) cause. I tip my rainbow hat on you my sweet mouse.
@reek4062
@reek4062 Жыл бұрын
you won't get laid in your mother's basement
@annien.1727
@annien.1727 9 ай бұрын
😡Don't EVER mock Mickey Mouse like that. He's as much of a victim of the woke agenda as we are. Bob is to blame for the mess, NOT Mickey.
@vicariousjohnson9823
@vicariousjohnson9823 Жыл бұрын
I’m 53 years old. I saw the original Raiders in a theater with my Dad. It was a great experience. This movie is really, really bad. A shameful treatment of such an iconic character.
@willpeony5534
@willpeony5534 Жыл бұрын
Thank you for your time, I won't even watch it when it comes free to TV.
@astrosquirrel5038
@astrosquirrel5038 Жыл бұрын
Thank goodness we no longer have to watch our heroes be strong, tough, and complex. I'm thankful we now live in an age where women put them in their place and show them their sexist, bigoted ways.
@jamessievert350
@jamessievert350 Жыл бұрын
🐂💩🤡show. And people got paid for this ridiculous leftists propaganda 🎥 movie. Next time call someone in a coma. There movie would be more interesting. Ridiculous.🤮🤮🤮
@industrialathlete6096
@industrialathlete6096 Жыл бұрын
Great sarcasms!
@silverstarlight9395
@silverstarlight9395 Жыл бұрын
So you admit that Indiana Jones is a sexist and bigot?
@saricubra2867
@saricubra2867 Жыл бұрын
​@@silverstarlight9395He always was. Never had a truly stable relationship with woman.
@moonbeam385
@moonbeam385 Жыл бұрын
I hear Sound of Freedom's kicking ass. : )
@alexfriedman918
@alexfriedman918 Жыл бұрын
No matter how many new Indiana Jones movies get made now, there are still only 3 - and they say Disney’s magic is all gone!
@BigElectricBull1981
@BigElectricBull1981 Жыл бұрын
I agree! I choose not even to acknowledge this or the crystal skull bullshit. The Indiana Jones saga ended in last crusade with him riding off into the sunset.
@cinemaniak1055
@cinemaniak1055 Жыл бұрын
@@BigElectricBull1981crystal skull had a lot of problems, sure. But at least it was made before Disney bought lucasfilm and before Kathleen Kennedy began butchering once great male leads. Crystal skull was phoned in, lazy and unnecessary, but at least it wasn’t woke.
@alexfriedman918
@alexfriedman918 Жыл бұрын
@@cinemaniak1055 I agree - it was a good-faith lazy cash grab, not something made out of spite, with malice and hatred towards fans!
@frankherrgott
@frankherrgott Жыл бұрын
Amazing work, each time. Bravo!
@philipwindowcleaner
@philipwindowcleaner Жыл бұрын
The Dial Tone of Density 😂😂 Like McFly “You’re my density”
@babaoriley1
@babaoriley1 Жыл бұрын
The Critical Drinker had some classics lol.
@mchammer5592
@mchammer5592 Жыл бұрын
The woke critic was so inspired by this films progressivism that the script wrote itself in less than 24 hours.
@josephberrie9550
@josephberrie9550 Жыл бұрын
minutes not hours... no original thought required
@juliotrivelli7480
@juliotrivelli7480 Жыл бұрын
@@josephberrie9550. I give them 5 stars also…………from 100 stars.
@robertmikolon5710
@robertmikolon5710 Жыл бұрын
Interestingly enough I enjoyed the first 15 minutes or so. What followed was the end of a great character. People have officially lost their collective minds.
@Hastur805
@Hastur805 Жыл бұрын
Thank you for saving me from spending my money on this.
@axelhopfinger533
@axelhopfinger533 Жыл бұрын
Definitely a must see for cinematic masochists!
@kevinp3550
@kevinp3550 Жыл бұрын
Well, in ten years or so Phoebe can play in the re-imagined "Wizard of Oz" . She has the chin to play the wicked witch, the makeup artists will have a great time. Great review, first time here, you almost had me going.😂
@bobsmith6079
@bobsmith6079 Жыл бұрын
And the nose. She's a doppelganger.
@TheSuperappelflap
@TheSuperappelflap Жыл бұрын
Totally missed chance for hollywood to cast Gal Gadot in Snow White instead of Peanut Butter Bridge
@friendme12345
@friendme12345 Жыл бұрын
I love attending a movie that belittles me, my family, my country and, if I am lucky, my religion. I want to see this movie 14 times.
@Catfishlipsdave
@Catfishlipsdave Жыл бұрын
I can't believe I missed opening night!
@TryingToWakeUp-qb7iu
@TryingToWakeUp-qb7iu Жыл бұрын
And all the other nights.
@corning1
@corning1 Жыл бұрын
“A five star classic! Exceeding ALL expectations.” Bro this dude be killing me. 😂. Thank you for the channel even if the algorithm is trying to keep you down. The laughs have been endless on my end.
@2dicejack37
@2dicejack37 Жыл бұрын
This is the best sarcasm/satire ive ever seen. How you all play along is brilliant!! Keep up the great work lol!!
@warlockofwordschannel7901
@warlockofwordschannel7901 5 ай бұрын
Funnily enough, Dial of Destiny is pretty much the fourth greatest Indy movie, as I predicted.
@ethanhunt3242
@ethanhunt3242 Жыл бұрын
Ive binged most of your backlog the last few days. This channel is just waiting to blow up. Great stuff.
@tnwodisciple42069
@tnwodisciple42069 11 ай бұрын
they need to remake indiana jones 5 and kill off the goddaughter within the first 5 minutes
@JJ-cc7gx
@JJ-cc7gx Жыл бұрын
Indiana Jane and the Buttdial of Dysentery
@jvt_redbaronspeaks4831
@jvt_redbaronspeaks4831 Жыл бұрын
And Disney kills ANOTHER iconic screen hero from my childhood. RIP Indiana Jones. Screw Harrison Ford.
@frmm123
@frmm123 Жыл бұрын
Rumor has it, Waller-Bridge is in talks with Larson for a film where they set about the process of together emasculating the elderly Starsky & Hutch.
@DerHammerSpricht
@DerHammerSpricht Жыл бұрын
Next it will be the two of them playing Thelma & Louise
@cmedtheuniverseofcmed8775
@cmedtheuniverseofcmed8775 Жыл бұрын
What most people won't realize is that Indy 5 is destined to be a global blockbuster that will earn $200 million in total. It's so inspirational. With this, Phoebe will get her wish, a new series for her. And Disney will pull out loans to make sure that it's made. Because they know how successful the new "Indiana Jane" series will be!
@Enderson5040
@Enderson5040 Жыл бұрын
Finally the hero we deserved but do not need 😂
@alantasman8273
@alantasman8273 Жыл бұрын
KK is the Jar Jar Binks of Cinematography.
@ccdev
@ccdev Жыл бұрын
I watch the WNBA when i have trouble sleeping.
@friendme12345
@friendme12345 Жыл бұрын
Indiana Jones is transitioning to Louisiana Janice
@codygriffin8256
@codygriffin8256 Жыл бұрын
Just in time to ruin my day. I mean make my day! For this is obviously the greatest film ever made with the greatest female character ever made of course!
@BigElectricBull1981
@BigElectricBull1981 Жыл бұрын
But how can you ever possibly hope to determine the greatest female character in these woke times!?? All are absolutely perfect and flawless in every way!
@karlheber23
@karlheber23 Жыл бұрын
The last 10 seconds of this video are perfect, well done TWC.
@debuffz7405
@debuffz7405 Жыл бұрын
I wish dial of destiny didn't exist. Crystal kingdom was perfect end. I wanna go back in time :(
@k.w.6626
@k.w.6626 Жыл бұрын
Just found this channel, and I love what you are doing here, this is such a genius idea for a channel. Amazing work! It would make for some great wooosh posts too.
@kennichols3992
@kennichols3992 Жыл бұрын
Such sustained sarcasm should be tapped as a renewable resource.
@claytonbigsby6911
@claytonbigsby6911 Жыл бұрын
I have spent 2 days listening to Indy 5 reviews.....2 days. 2 great days of hearing every single person taking the absolute piss out of this Insult made into a Film. I will say dammit your style is still so unique and catchy, punch for punch, man you really have a good thing going here and I can't wait to see you rise above the rest like the true cream of the crop your show is!!💛💚🍻🎉
@ayaakiosawa0
@ayaakiosawa0 Жыл бұрын
I used to hate critics of media but now that media is total dogshit I enjoy these more than the actual movies. I haven't watched a Marvel movie in theaters since Iron Man
@greasyguido
@greasyguido Жыл бұрын
Your wordplay is immaculate. You have quickly become my favorite reviewer.
@Taporeee
@Taporeee Жыл бұрын
I really appreciate your absolute lack of any sarcasm
@corning1
@corning1 Жыл бұрын
It’s so great. I love this dude.
@darrylldoucette6895
@darrylldoucette6895 Жыл бұрын
I could have sworn the list of villains was going to be, “Giant balls, snakes, Germans and fathers.” The edit set it up.
@XenoSeid
@XenoSeid Жыл бұрын
My favorite part of the movie was when Indiana Jones said “It’s Indiana Jones time!!” And totally Kingdom of the Crystal Skulled ever where!
@RappingNinja
@RappingNinja Жыл бұрын
The actual movie, if you watch it, is about Helena being a shitty asshole who only turns it around in the 11th hour thanks to Indy’s influence. She never steals the spotlight; she’s not even a hero. It’s… incredibly obvious
@littlefaith8740
@littlefaith8740 Жыл бұрын
I'm glad words didn't fail you for this abomination. They sure have far me. RIP my fond memories of Indie.
@jeremytitus9519
@jeremytitus9519 Жыл бұрын
If a three year old girl draws a picture and says “that’s me fighting doctor octopus”, do you burn your collection of mint-in-box Amazing Spider Man figurines? That’s all this was. A toddler with a crayon. Sure, it was a multibillion dollar crayon. But still a crayon.
@KJ-vp5fn
@KJ-vp5fn Жыл бұрын
She's not even easy on the eyes...
@CruisnChris
@CruisnChris Жыл бұрын
"Indiana Jones 5 is a modern masterpiece" the box office will disagree with you.
@davethomas8410
@davethomas8410 Жыл бұрын
This movie is awesome
@timehater50
@timehater50 Жыл бұрын
Great review man your parody and satire of it really made me laugh a bunch, more entertaining than this flick could ever be.
@ConquerYou
@ConquerYou Жыл бұрын
The funny thing is, people used to say just how bad the Crystal Skull movie was. 5 here is off the charts, and now Crystall Skull is being graded on a curve and ppl are giving it a passing grade. Bravo Hollywood!!
@KeesKouwenberg
@KeesKouwenberg Жыл бұрын
I love sarcasm taken to the limit!
@chadmastermorgan
@chadmastermorgan Жыл бұрын
TWC, mate, your editing is second to none 🤣
@songotenks7531
@songotenks7531 Жыл бұрын
I love this type of vids you do, please continue making them.
@stuccosuperstars
@stuccosuperstars Жыл бұрын
R.I.P Dr Indiana Jones you deserved much better 🫡🇺🇲
@alexfriedman918
@alexfriedman918 Жыл бұрын
6:55 “A Bridge too far”, indeed! 😂
@HuskyandStarch
@HuskyandStarch Жыл бұрын
Nice to see your videos starting to get more views. You deserve em
@Mr_Robotts
@Mr_Robotts Жыл бұрын
I get it now. Kathleen Kennedy is destroying Lucasfilm so that we appreciate and love Georges creations more.
The Incredible Success of Kathleen Kennedy at Disney
16:43
The Woke Critic
Рет қаралды 151 М.
Why Indiana Jones 5 is Complete GARBAGE | Video Essay
18:38
Movie Overload
Рет қаралды 193 М.
Chain Game Strong ⛓️
00:21
Anwar Jibawi
Рет қаралды 41 МЛН
黑天使被操控了#short #angel #clown
00:40
Super Beauty team
Рет қаралды 61 МЛН
When you have a very capricious child 😂😘👍
00:16
Like Asiya
Рет қаралды 18 МЛН
Indiana Jones & the Defiling of an Icon
19:19
Vex Electronica
Рет қаралды 74 М.
All 138 Times Rey DESTROYS the Patriarchy
20:50
The Woke Critic
Рет қаралды 96 М.
Everything Wrong with Snow White... in 17 Minutes
17:50
The Woke Critic
Рет қаралды 33 М.
Indiana Jones 5 Is A Crime Against Cinema
18:15
The Movie Cynic
Рет қаралды 663 М.
Every Indiana Jones Movie Ranked
34:18
HN Films
Рет қаралды 7 М.
Indiana Jones 5: The Problem with Phoebe Waller-Bridge
10:02
NerdWord
Рет қаралды 168 М.
The Women Who SAVED Star Wars!
10:02
The Woke Critic
Рет қаралды 80 М.
Helena is a Horribly Written Character - Indiana Jones 5
30:07
Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny is A Disgrace
18:31
Robot Head
Рет қаралды 341 М.