Things to NEVER do While Dating in Germany?

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I asked Germans and foreigners on the streets of Cologne and Munich, Germany about what not to do while dating a German, who pays and what are some of the culture shocks they've experienced when it comes to dating.
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0:00 Intro
1:00 Who pays on a date in Germany?
4:00 How do Germans feel about the "macho" culture?
4:56 Sponsorship message
6:58 What should foreigners not do while dating Germans?
8:09 Who approaches in Germany + German compliments
9:40 How do Germans view commitment?
CREW:
Marina Iakovleva (directing)
/ youtubermarina
Oleh Voitovych (editing)
/ olkowg
Filmed in:
Munich and Cologne, Germany

[@DatingBeyondBorders]

New video is out! What do you think about the German mentality when it comes to dating? Is it for you, or is it a hard pass?

[@Frivals]

I like it, girls forced to approach men, love it already ❤❤❤

[@erzascarlet5078]

Hard pass! I like REAL MEN, not p*ssies 🐱 disguised as one.

[@tiwongelungu3747]

Ikr 😂😂😂

[@AnastasiaSaenz]

No problem for me!

[@henri_ol]

"If she has more money , she should pay for me , i'm worthy" i would love to have this german man's confidence 😂

[@FBAagent]

I want a world outside Germany where women feel empowered when they pay the bill 😊🤟in most of countries in the world it’s 2023 but women are still below men… sadly… I really hope that this attitude can go further in the world, not only in Germany.

[@Frivals]

❤❤❤💪💪💪

[@sakeebkamal3472]

He has good marketing skills ❤

[@user-pm7ex2us8j]

@@FBAagentit’s sad that women need to pay bills to feel empowered.

[@amiquigonzales7917]

Agreed. Me too, would love to have his confidence, not him.

[@Omnigrotesque]

As a German I want to say: No, dating and making compliments is not especially hard in Germany. Period. It goes by different rules than old-school-dating or in more "passionate" countries, but those rules are not hard to understand, once you get the gist of it. You want old-school-dating? Go for it. You will find Germans who prefer the old-school style. But the majority dates differently. For me personally it is a red flag, when a woman expects me to pay on a first date. This is not a lack of respect, it is just my believe in a certain equality and the girls and women I dated in the past would agree on that. I'm having relationships and dates since 19 years in Germany and I don't find it hard or dispassionate. There is more than enough people in Germany with whom you can have wonderful relationships.

[@user-pm7ex2us8j]

So why don’t you articulate that easy rules in a clear way? You see, people are suffering:) explain what are these rules, please)

[@Omnigrotesque]

​@@user-pm7ex2us8j Let me try. ^^ - When you meet, treat them like a friend. Don't be pushy or romantic too early on. Just have a nice conversation, show interest in them and try to tell them something interesting about yourself. This also goes for chivalry. Just don't! Be nice and respectful but don't be "the man" or "the woman". You are equal. Relax. - The occasional touch on the shoulder or upper arm is okay and even nice for most people. It is more like "testing the waters" and showing comfort with them, but don't get too close on an early stage. Observe the reaction and when you get closer after one or two dates, you can become more touchy. Remember: Having much body contact is something for when you are already close. - Make compliments that aim on the person and not on their sexual value and again: Don't make it romantic too early on. Don't say "you are so beautiful" - this is something for couples. I made very good experiences with something like "you have a cool style", "you are very thoughtful" and similar things. - Communicate very directly. "Do you feel comfortable when I touch you?". "Did you find this compliment irritating?". It solves a lot of problems before they even arise. - Regarding the first kiss: To just try it carefully when you trust your intuition or to ask "can I kiss you" - both can work. I did both in the past and it was okay. In case of doubt do the latter. Maybe I could formulate even some more things and yes, it is quite some text but don't forget: It can seem much when the german mindset is alien to you but the most important thing is, when you get in touch with Germans, observe and synchronize with their mentality. It is a natural process that only requires some time without learning rules meticulously. And always remember: In case of doubt, communicate openly and honestly. This "manual" is only a tendency of course. Germany is a big country with a lot of very different people. I can only talk about my own experiences.

[@marvin2678]

where are you from ? was it hard for you to adapt in the first few months ?

[@silveryfeather208]

I'm Canadian I would love a German man like that. Like god its so annoying when men get all their panties in a twist when I tell them I'm uncomfortable with them paying. Its not about who pays its about respecting wishes. My food is my food. If you wanna pay pay for your own. Like why does it bother you so much if I pay for my own?

[@Limpi43]

@@Omnigrotesque Your second comment should be mandatory for everyone to read it.

[@AnnamariaLeprini]

as an Italian woman, it depends on many things, but in general it should be indifferent. 1) how much do you know the person, if it's a complete stranger it's ok to split; 2) how much money? €2.50 for a coffee is one thing, €30 for a restaurant dinner is another. I wouldn't feel comfortable if he paid €30 or more on the first date, within a relationship yes

[@yaroslavaliashenko5948]

A man who pays and opens doors does not have to be a macho. There are plenty adequate men who do these things.

[@priscillad8]

My cousin is Italian and she says she admires the direct way of the Germans because she is tired of the macho way of the Italians. As a Brazilian, I don't like people doing everything for me, but I think Brazilians are more similar to Italians

[@soullessnight6539]

In my experience, Italian men are still very much misogynistic. They like to feel the own their women and still have not learnt how to manage their anger like adults. The call it being passionate, I call it a toddler.

[@user-zp8sk2rc4m]

Hello! I love LOVE your channel...so great! I'm married and over 50 but I would love to hear about people my age and their dating experiences cross culturally. I think it would be so interesting!

[@rhalfcorrea2684]

By the way, Great video! you always bring a good topic😁✨🙌🏻

[@flugente]

I really would like to see something like this just about berlin in germany because most people visit here and it is so diffrent to other countrys in germany you cant compare

[@johngonzalez4298]

Happy Thursday, Marina 🥂! Hope you're having a great week. We need to get your channel to 635K subscribers and it's definitely achievable and I know you're going to get there soon. I LOL at 6:44 😂, and hope you'll improve your French curse words 🤭. Sending my love ❤ from Miami, Florida, USA 🇺🇲

[@simona4421]

The Bulgarian guy is really funny 😄 such a positive energy

[@PortfolioPL]

11:23 They do not have problem with commitment. They just don't want to commit to her.

[@Bracarensis]

😂😂

[@exceladeogun3591]

We want more of the former video format, the one where peoplw from various countries are together in like a studio

[@Sammi_Kristiansen]

Thank you Marina for asking about Germans. I hope that you'd continue your real person Euro trips to Slovakia! Because it's a leser-known country. We can be off the beaten path

[@geesinc.1217]

Can you go to Italy next please?

[@gwendolynpenelope]

My fave videos of yours are the Germany ones. Btw I fell for a Berlin boy in January. I’m moving from Toronto to Berlin next week :) SO excited. I remember watching some of your videos in the beginning just to try to understand any cultural differences. Turns out Berlin people are quite different from people from other German cities

[@DatingBeyondBorders]

Good luck!

[@AnastasiaSaenz]

Just out of curiosity, how are Berlin people different from those of other German cities, if I may ask?

[@gwendolynpenelope]

@@AnastasiaSaenz more lax on rules and being on time, spontaneity. Obviously everyone is diff but this is what I hear from people who are from Berlin or who’ve experienced it there. And also from KZbin videos about creators making fun of differences in Berlin vs other parts of Germany. You can check out “radical living” or “uyen.” Berlin is more lax in general. People might jay walk. I’m not German and I’m sure Germans in the comment section can chime in, but I’ve also experienced it during my 4 times being there as well as visiting 6 other German cities.

[@amiquigonzales7917]

@@gwendolynpenelope Good luck Gwendolyne Penélope! .... I guess you are of Spanish origin because of your names, two Julio Iglesias's absolute hits: "Penélope, con su bolso de piel marrón.." and "Tu nombre, .Gwendolyne".. If someone Spanish at heart finds Berlin guys are to fall for, I will definitely follow the advice

[@priscillad8]

​@@gwendolynpeneloperadical living is super funny

[@priscillad8]

To the guy from Iran, as a Latina, I say "I feel you, broo", we love talking touching

[@Vallovesthis]

I feel like that it totally depends on the generation, the background, the self esteem,... Which makes it harder for men to know what's right because there are no strict dating rules like in the us. When I was at university I would only let a man pay if I really liked him, because I wanted to avoid any conflict about me not wanting to go further or meet again vs "thanks for nothing" attitude with which you could be confronted with. When I know I earn the same or more money it's fine for me to pay, but this can lead to a feeling of me carrying all the burdens if it becomes a habit. Let's face it, if both want to have children the loss of income and opportunities at work, hobbies, travelling etc a woman faces in comparison with the man's situation is totally inappropriate not to start with all a pregnancy can do to a woman's body... So being a bit wiser now I feel it's fair that men at least pay some restaurant bills to show their appreciation for the disadvantages women face if starting a family. (by a German)

[@misscogito]

very nicely said

[@sparkyin3d]

Well said ❤!

[@marvin2678]

well the man pays the bills when the women has children... so i dont see your point why a man should pay if he doesnt even know whether they date and will have kids with each iortther

[@Alexseya]

​@@LaxtovikAre you bffr right now? Pregnancy can kill a woman and you're denying what prgnancy can do to a woman's body???

[@Alexseya]

@@Laxtovik lol bffr

[@sarah-annehewitt1834]

1:24 the bloke with the glasses is so fine 🫦

[@didierbaudot]

I think splitting the bill is the best especially when you don't know each other at the first date, i always splitted bills with women there was never a problem for that it depends also what kind of woman you have a date with if she wears much jewellery and expensive perfume and clothes from a brand and too much make up you probably have to pay everything

[@Smeraldo-_]

As a Latina who was raised in a German way, physical touch was something that I wasn't used to. So when I stared to date my bf he (was raised in Germany but his parents are still Portuguese) never touched me at the beginning as he knew that German culture isn't like that, I had a very hard time getting comfortable with getting touched by someone.

[@sendmespam001]

0:02 years ago, when I noticed that my german girlfriend didn't react to my compliments, it was like an uncomfortable silence, it seemed like she was ignoring it, was overwhelmed or angry... for me it was weird and I thought she wasn't happy with me XD

[@S5Dic09]

and what happened? did she have low self-esteem? did you ever brought this up to her?

[@DubstepENG]

I’m French and that « go f yourself » caught me off guard 😂😂

[@sienna9743]

Pt'et ce qu'on lui a répondu en terrasse à Paris 😅, va savoir..

[@mendicius_jade]

I once took the courage to confess my feelings with a Spanish crush, and eventually he admitted that he was not good at approaching someone let alone picking up signs whenever someone is trying to signal interest towards him. Sadly, I got rejected in the end, but at least he rejected me decently. He made it clear that he's straight, but also glad to have me as a f.r.i.e.n.d. Now we're still cordial and civil towards each other. There is no hatred on my side. We are still good friends. I also appreciate that he trusts me as a friend that he is also fine with sharing (some of) his vulnerabilities and intimate stories of his life.

[@sssam844]

He said the thing about "not being good at approaching" to make the rejection easier for you so that you don't get embarrassed too much, being a gentleman. It's never a good idea to ask a guy whether he wants to be intimate with you or not since they tend to treat women softly, and putting them under pressure isn't a right thing to do

[@aristarchos5342]

I didn't understand. You are gay and he said not because he's straight?

[@S5Dic09]

wtf

[@rhalfcorrea2684]

I think at least here in Brazil we are more traditional in therms of dating, men always pays here specially because it is an act and gesture of kindness and care to the woman, Brazil clicks more with traditional countries where the patriarchal is big like Slavic countries for example😎✨🇧🇷

[@Jean-Jaures]

Why care to a stranger on the first date. On the first date there should no expectations from both sides.

[@fatisummer9106]

@@Jean-Jaures Ha ,the guy is the one who asks the lady out and make the first move, so it doesn't matter if he was stranger or not

[@Jean-Jaures]

@@fatisummer9106 the first move is to talk and try to know/understand the other person ... not to care for a reason you don't know at this moment.

[@fatisummer9106]

@@Jean-Jaures You go to lady ask her out and then think she is obligated to pay half cuz she is not worth it , and then you demand her to "know" you and "understand" you , Excuse me sir ,who do you think you are ? Harry Style? LOL

[@Jean-Jaures]

@@fatisummer9106 in Germany we go for a walk and talk on the first date or just go for a coffee ;)

[@goldilocks913]

I went to Germany to meet a Romanian lady who l had been talking to online and we were having a nice meal at an Italian restaurant. As l didn’t speak German she had dealt with ordering but l paid her and she was going to settle the bill.The owner came out and started talking in English ( my language) and said loudly’ In my country the man pays for the lady!’. I was about to say’ l did, and in MY country we don’t try to show up the man in front of the lady!’ when she told him l had already paid! So it seems to be a big thing in Germany 😂

[@DerHarlekin98]

I bet money he’s not German, maybe not even Italian

[@marvin2678]

you sure the owner of the resturant was german ? ahahahah

[@helgaioannidis9365]

It might be surprising, but Italian restaurants in Germany are usually run by Italians and sometimes by Turks. Germany is a multicultural country, you meat a lot of immigrants. And in an Italian restaurant in Germany the waiters are not Germans.

[@cogitoergosum9129]

For me the money doesnt matter. If she wants it I pay. If not than not. Greetings from Cologne

[@Abcdefghji]

Kölner sind einfach chillig

[@cogitoergosum9129]

@@Abcdefghji haha ja das sagt man uns nach :D

[@Commentator488]

I thought German dating is more casual like that Scandinavians have

[@cogitoergosum9129]

@@Commentator488 depends

[@sheiysomera9628]

In Philippines, my culture is , all man pay for woman. Shopping, dating or in restaurants.. he is the one to pay. Anyways, in shopping it depends on him of he pay the bills. But in restaurants during dating he is his obligation.

[@xNeverlandxx]

it just depends if you know or don't know the person , perhaps you met someone on a dating app.. In that situation you both should pay for your own meal on the first date.. and if you loved each other's company and you both decided to have a second date then the man should pay. BUT if you decided to leave the friendzone with someonebody you actually know for a long time , the man should 100% pay for the first date because you have already a base to work on and by paying the bill on the first date you show her that you actually want to take care of her.

[@diofromyozgat]

Spanish lady is very fun&lovely! I would love to have a friend like her

[@Frivals]

Exactly, just friends. Too fat

[@diofromyozgat]

​@@Frivalsher german boyfriend looks good tho? I'm a girl but weight doesnt really matter for me and if i were a men the weight would still not matter for me.

[@Frivals]

@@diofromyozgat sure 😂😂😂😂😂

[@diofromyozgat]

@@Frivals why not?

[@Frivals]

@@diofromyozgat it's disgusting. Wake up

[@patbecker333]

I love it when a man pays, I’m old fashioned. There’s very few gentlemen…. If there’s chemistry, I wouldn’t mind invite the guy over homemade lunch or dinner… So that’s my way of showing gratitude, showcasing my cooking skills.👍

[@VeyMylife]

Same here😊

[@amiquigonzales7917]

Traditional values, and I guess you would love to marry someone nice, hard-worker and faithful to start a family ... Good luck, you definitely deserve to find your partner for life.

[@joimonae4090]

Same here 😊

[@fatisummer9106]

Mee too ,I do invite him to surprise dinner on his birthday and his special occasions, but I could never date a guy who wont pay at a restaurant that really the bare minimum, also it just super awkward, I mean you just sit there deciding who pays, do they keep track of it or something ,weird but I guess different nation different culture

[@JessyCastellon-xl9jc]

Hello❤

[@justalostcause4425]

Splitting the bill feels like I'm out on a date with my friend not my potential partner

[@movingshapes]

Then you can pay :) Otherwise you are greedy and cheap!

[@user-wb9ii9rj7k]

germans want a roommate not a partner

[@Frivals]

🤦‍♂️When you pretend men to pay for you in exchange for your vagina is called prostitution and for an illusion of getting the behind is called a scam.

[@marvin2678]

@@user-wb9ii9rj7k yes we want someone you can peacfully live together and not have arguments all the time

[@marvin2678]

so youre paying ? :)

[@brd2287]

Where in Germany is this city/park?!?

[@debayanpal3181]

Its Munich in South Germany.

[@Chahlie]

Even when I go out with my adult son and his wife- whoever asks pays. Simple. Also the same with my married couple friends. One person asks and chooses the place etc, and that person pays. However, it is common for the invitee to offer to get the tip :) There are times when I am having a catch-up with older or wealthier friends and they insist on paying and I graciously accept. It's etiquette really.

[@yaadav2102]

The is who said Germany is a boring country is 100% right. He was on point with whatever he said.

[@misscogito]

"what do i get if i pay???" LOL her company and her time

[@FBAagent]

Thats so sad that she really think that way, it’s empowering to pay as a woman I think.

[@Frivals]

So what about receiving the same in return without the money? 🤦‍♂️When you pretend men to pay for you in exchange for your vagina is called prostitution and for an illusion of getting the behind is called a scam.

[@OverTheVoids]

That goes the other way around as well. As a result of that, I can understand the logic of being obligated to pay if you are the one that wanted go out on the date. You are thus the one who is requested the company and time of the person that you are asking out.

[@marvin2678]

so she doesnt get the company and time of the man ?

[@misscogito]

​@@marvin2678 i meant when you start going out, it's usually the man who asks for a date. So to convince her to himself, he pays in a restaurant. It's a part of flirting i think. Later, when I go out with someone frequently, I totally want to pay for myself. I never mean that a man should pay for me to the rest of my life 😂😂 but if he wants to gain my attention and interest *at the beginning* then yes.

[@gardeningtipswithvicky]

I do expect that who invites me for a date( usually a man ) so he should pay...Of course first dates i wont order fuagra and fish... coffee+ toast maximum but it's a must for me

[@cobrakaineverdies5006]

So is it also a must for you to do the dishes and the laundry for your man when in a relationship? If not, you are a hypocrite.

[@maxalbert8903]

Dont go to Germany for dating. As a German I can say that.

[@Frivals]

Girls approaching men and pay for them, what you want more?

[@marvin2678]

good, for left for me

[@Jean-Jaures]

Nutten musst du dir woanders kaufen z.B. in der Ukraine oder Russland ;)

[@GeoSocratic]

It's like they didn't tell the whole story. For example, why do men never approach women in Germany? Something tells me it has to do with all these feminist claims that men are predators. So in order to not take the risk of being called such name or worse, they simply don't approach women. Does that make any sense or is it something else?

[@maxalbert8903]

@@GeoSocratic In reality, here in Germany, it looks like it's not worth it for most men to approach women, because there is very little positive response. The rejections are relatively cold and deprecating. In general, however, the German culture is very cold and not so casual. Rather abnormal here to get into conversation with women. I approached many women here myself in Germany during my student days. Most of the time it is not worth it.

[@YouAreTheRaidBoss]

The guy at 1:00 and 8:30 is so cute! 😍

[@phoenix8998]

i have lived in Germnany five years never dated a german man. i now think i chose the wrong country. :D three years ago i moved back to my country but now i miss and gonna go there again to visit but not sure if i want to move back there again.

[@S5Dic09]

who cares

[@arcabuz]

I’m Spanish living in Finland and dating is miserable, if the style in Germany is similar (date apps), forget it.

[@july9566]

En serio?? En la Ciudad de México las suecas y finlandesas son buen divertidas .

[@arcabuz]

@@july9566 exacto. En Ciudad de México. Allí todo el mundo es divertido. Te invito a que pases 10 años en un país nórdico

[@user-lx6dw2ks1o]

@@july9566 As a GERMAN🇩🇪 who lives in GERMANY 🇩🇪 and love clocking american girls. I appreciate american women.

[@SpicyTrekker]

In my culture, men are seen as providers and especially if the man is the one who invited you out on a date, it is expected that he is the one paying. I offer to pay for after drinks or dessert at the next place just so the man doesn't think that I only went with him for a free meal. But all of my dates, they always push to pay for our meals...always even if I take out my card/wallet. (I dated a diff European & Mediterranean ethnicities including German) It's a macho thing I guess. It's easy to like someone who initiates paying up.

[@sssam844]

Yeah I wouldn't have met up again with a guy who hasn't paid for the first date. Usually it's just a coffee, since I don't like the level of expectations which is left after a dinner date and the format in general when you have to talk to a stranger three hours straight. On the other hand, I try to insist on paying for my coffee, if I didn't like them

[@cobrakaineverdies5006]

Interesting. Since you are so insisting on traditional values I hope you are also the one cooking and cleaning in relationships then (of course without complaining).

[@tnu87]

Pay your bill😂😂

[@sssam844]

@@tnu87 go cry to your gf - the left hand 😁

[@sssam844]

@@cobrakaineverdies5006 hätte dich eh nur gekorbt, chill 😁

[@toomuchinformation]

​@@cobrakaineverdies5006Well that's a jump. If she's working as well, she takes on all of that as well?

[@gurkankaraali9608]

what a weird culture

[@soullessnight6539]

Germany is different I guess but this is for the men who aren’t in Germany😂. As a girl, generally if a girl insists she pays for her meal on the first date, it is bc she doesn’t want another date with you… she doesn’t like you. Sad but true.

[@kalebind1]

How old are you? Germany consists of 81 millions inhabitants

[@Limpi43]

3:44 "...paying the bill is the simpliest thing that he could do." No, the simpliest thing is everybody pays their own. The german-iranian guy about the "Could you please stop touching me." and that never happened with anybody from "warmer culture". Are you sure that nobody felt the tiniest uncomfortable with you touching them? Or they just didn't dare to say stop? The brazilian girl said it: when brazilians compliment they don't mean it, when germans compliment they mean it. And people still lament about how bad the german culture is...

[@Bracarensis]

💯

[@sssam844]

Still doesn't prevent them from taking an advantage from a woman they don't love and care about. Had to find it out in the middle of winter when he suddenly decided to accept a job offer and move to another city and the rental contract was on him. They are not as simple as seem to be

[@cobrakaineverdies5006]

lol I wouldn’t pay shit for anyone who I don’t know yet. Might as well go to a prostitute. There you get what you want and immediately so. Paying for dates bears the risk you get nothing in return.

[@PaulaOx]

​@@cobrakaineverdies5006then go get a prostitute broke boy!

[@kamillamn]

I find a bit bad that germans don't use to do or receive compliments, in another hand they are very good in criticizing/complaining. It seems like nothing make them happy.😅 It was a bit shoking for me.

[@Jean-Jaures]

That's why I'm really proud of Germany ... the people are free to choose the real love.

[@fatisummer9106]

"Real love" no way, Germans exchange their partners faster than the season changes LOL

[@Jean-Jaures]

@@fatisummer9106 better than wasting years with the wrong ;)

[@mysticc6232]

What real love? The men are cheap, and the women are miserable

[@Baphomet-bk7cx]

No, mostly german men are gay thats why german women need better men such black men

[@user-lx6dw2ks1o]

@@Baphomet-bk7cx As a GERMAN🇩🇪 who lives in GERMANY 🇩🇪 and love clocking american girls. I appreciate american women.

[@metaman1546]

Idk why Germans still put Latinos and Spaniards in the same box as it's like comparing a Scottish person with an American, two very different nationalities from two very different parts of the globe. However, the preference for Latino women is mostly based on looks, neither an average German man, nor a female from e.g. Colombia will be able to have flawless and smooth conversations being flexible, witty and speak their minds in English as they would in their native tongues so in most cases the language barrier makes everything automatically super friendly, just pay attention the next time you hear 2 different nationalities communicate in English, it's always a lot of "hihihi and hahaha" without the same intensity and energy as it might have in a monocultural encounter.

[@ritarin2434]

wow my boyfriend literally pay for everything, I really appriciate him.

[@EA00000]

My German boyfriend love to be touch cuddle I kiss him show him emotion !

[@cogitoergosum9129]

Germany is the most loved and hated country at the same time in this topic hahah

[@damiandennis3740]

😁🤣

[@slapshot0074]

That's OK german men, you continue to not compliment women. Those of us from the UK, Italy and France will get the job done for you.

[@prussiansocietyofamerica]

We German Men are much smarter than other Men! If you want us to compliment Women, they have to earn your way with us, Women have to be much more seriously involved with us and warm us up first... All the countries you mentioned, the dudes there are doormats.

[@marvin2678]

hahaha bro said uk...yeah contuine dreaming, you will catch a police case

[@sssam844]

​@@marvin2678guys from UK are way funnier ngl

[@Baphomet-bk7cx]

Uk ? You mean londonistan?

[@louiseleite3866]

Germans would get on with the rude Dutch 😂

[@alioualiousaadou3460]

Your add was so long, try keeping it short next please. I had to skip more than half of it.

[@chetyoubetya8565]

What do I get??Buddy you get to remain single.

[@user-zq5kd6we3y]

"In my culture...". well, you're not any more in your culture, sad to hear it

[@yuliag8073]

And? It doesn't mean she has to lower her standards to the level of the local cheapskates. There is a lot of fish in the sea, you know.

[@user-zq5kd6we3y]

@@yuliag8073 со своим самоваром в Тулу не ездят ,you know.

[@yuliag8073]

@@user-zq5kd6we3y Можно и съездить, если чемодан позволяет взять самовар. А вообще, в Германии не только немцы живут FYI.

[@jennyballesteros4807]

I would never go out with a man that doesnt invite me at least the first date, if he is not able to be a gentelman at least on the first date i have no interest in seeing him, i prefer a man that is on his masculine energy, nowadays most men are very much on their femenine energy, not a atractive at all.

[@CuriouslyWatching]

Day 4 of asking to date Marina

[@hopelawrence2022]

This is so interesting… I’ve gone out with both platonic and romantic partners. Where I am from in the American south, it’s always customary for the man to pick up both tabs in fact, the guy will usually insist and they might even be offended if you pay for yourself. I’ve always insisted on paying for myself straight away…even in the beginning stages while casually dating someone. American men are driven mostly by their ego than common sensibility 😂

[@SATURN.130]

Interesting. Here in India the man should always pay no matter what. Doesn't matter if the girl is rich or not the man needs to pay period. If the girl has to pay then she will breakup with you.

[@julyg2989]

Im woman but I would pay all for this girl from Kosovo ¡Beautifullllll! Im colombian and I likeed her beauty.

[@Crystalwolf256]

I’m American and tbh I’m not I to the whole macho man thing. I find it a bit of a turn off and just ugh weird and deep inside I get annoyed when guys open MY own car door for me. It’s my car I can open the door to get in lol. It’s just too much for me. I also don’t mind paying especially if I have the money for myself. And I’m always down for a coffee date too. I feel like women in my area and in the US as a whole are asking for too much in today’s economy

[@rosenberg6060]

So i am getman

[@TheEssenceIsLove]

I find it very interesting to observe that german women believe they "owe" "Something" To a man who pays for their date. In fact they don't "owe" Anything to him. They already did a very beautiful gesture by just showing up and being present and aware during their date. Thats it. No more than that 😌 if a woman wants to show some gesture she can also do it in a different way, eg by bringing him a small gift, like a nice book or something.

[@CatalinaLinal7710]

In Germany it is much more common to pay seperately by default so of course that results in the person who gets it payed for feeling like they're "owing" the person person something. Women in Germany just don't expect to have stuff paid for them as much by default, and the "owing" feeling goes both ways. In fact, your comment reads pretty arrogant to me as a German woman. Why does the man need to pay everything just because you are there and show basic decency by staying focused on your date? That's a pretty low bar for yourself you're praising, in my opinion. 🤨

[@TennisBarbie119]

It’s sad to see that these women don’t value the feminine essence that they bring.

[@simonehanrath5991]

Why is it so hard to just live and let live...? I was reading a book the other day featuring one of Europe's "more conservative countries" (Italy) in the 70s. I feel like there was a lot more persons embracing thoughts of individual freedom to just to whatever the hell you like in a book written 50 years ago than all of these people here bitching about gender roles and expectations. Why is it so hard to just have a good time without someone elses fucking opion. Have a beer have a laugh gonto bed with as many partners you can find around to tango just because you can. Whats the big deal?!

[@SRBOMBONICA86]

Sleeping with different men is neither good nor healthy for a woman

[@jeanjacqueslundi3502]

Lol I was ith you until the last sentence. Why does freedom have to boil down to going to bed with multiple partners? Let me guess, your parents are divorced?

[@simonehanrath5991]

@@jeanjacqueslundi3502 well thats a rather rude and uneducated guess ... Makes just as much sense as me saying "you wrote this because your parents are divorced! And now you try to impose your trauma on all of the rest of the world". That is: none. So getting back to my last sentence then. I thought it would make sense to write a more provocative statement. Obviously not because i think we should all sleep with one another to make the world a better place (though perhaps a better alternative to make love instead of war?) but because many people still seem to have so much problems with the thought of doing so and getting upset if it is proposed as you neatly showed by comenting the way you did. If people want to love, live to the fullest and have sex with one and the same person its all well. If they would want to do the exact same thing with more than one person it becomes offensive to random strangers who guess their parents are divorced.

[@jeanjacqueslundi3502]

@@simonehanrath5991 Maybe I'm one step aahead. Yes, my comment was flippant, but I have no problem with people having sex as much as they want with whom they want, so long as its consensual. But there's many people out there, who feel themselves progressive and who inhereted a certain world view. that seems to think THAT is a manifestation of respect and freedom amongst men. It's not. It doesn't come from "live and let live". It comes from not having thought the problem deep enough. True live and let live aknowledges the harm this does to people. It doesn't shy away from looking at how freedom comes with RESPONSABILITY. And many people who feel themselves "live and let live" are just irresponsible. I also don't think, say prostitution (i'm not comparing to this, it's just an example) should be illegal...I think it should be legal. But it's IRRESPONSIBLE from me to talk with a woman who is a prostitute legally as if what she is doing is healthy for her. Just ebcause we have the freedom to live a society where that is legal....doesn't mean the values that serve HUMANS icnlude prostitution. It's not from a religious place....it's more an empathic place. WHY do women need to prostitute themselves legally? And if they were to live in a society that didn't require them to, to get money....would they still do it? People get hung up on promiscuity because it leaves a trail of hurt and pain behind it in many cases. And a warped view of what a human that feels themselves valuable engages in.

[@tobiojo6469]

Germany is a great country to visit and the women are fantastic

[@eugenedavis6792]

I was stationed in Heilbronn, Germany during the late 80's; I have also traveled back there so many time because of the Hospitality like that is rear in the States. Now that I finally retired from the USPS WITH 29 years & 11 Months I plan to go back to Germany to visit. go Site Seeing, make new friends, go to Night Clubs and enjoy every moment there, who know I just might me my significate other, and marriage isn't on her mind like Western Woman.

[@lukasrowlinhelcky5731]

take this from a guy - If a guy don't want to use his earned money of a cup of coffee or a meal on you girls, you know he just want's the bed time :) and the same goes on if you are a dating couple and he doesn't wanr to meet your parents, trust me these guys will brake up with you.

[@alinafakin370]

It's a tragedy that German women have actually brought on themselves. Just listen to their answers!

[@Frivals]

What tragedy? Having to pay for themselves and approach men without expecting men to do all the work?

[@marvin2678]

lo what ? what tragedy ?

[@allykid4720]

​@@Frivals Blowback from feminism, of course this is the tragedy!

[@GeoSocratic]

@@Frivals Marriage and Birth rates will tell you otherwise.

[@Frivals]

@@GeoSocratic have nothing to do. Also in japan is worst and men pay everything for females

[@Sofia2653]

Where is the chivalry in Germany? Somewhere lost among the patriarchism of the east: women belong to the kitchen and splitting bills in the German culture. The worst of both worlds!!! Never again! 😅

[@prussiansocietyofamerica]

Awww, Too Bad, Sooo Sad!!! Deal with it. We German Men are the prize. Most Competent and Hardest working Men in Europe, we are the Heart and Engine of Europe and all European Men. You're going to have to fight to win us, and that means paying up!

[@Mantos777]

@@prussiansocietyofamerica Not gonna be a problem just like ww1 and ww2

[@dragounet2469]

So you dont belong to the kitchen, you work, you get paid but the man still has to pay for everything ? That's a non sens.

[@prussiansocietyofamerica]

@@Mantos777 Europe is dying because of the results of WW1 and WW2. The conditions today speak for itself.

[@Mantos777]

@@prussiansocietyofamerica Bring back Bismarck he can solve it

[@fredyharelrioscabrera1171]

The Ukrainian girl... so depending, so sad.

[@Mantos777]

Not everyone is woke and a part of lqbtqsfkjghksfjug mate

[@CupcakeStudioVoiceover]

It is normal in the east, different cultures exist, deal with it

[@FBAagent]

Yeah it’s 2023 and they still stick to their parents mentality… I am wondering if they think that the only place they belong in is the kitchen… so sad…

[@fredyharelrioscabrera1171]

Throwing stones at women who refuse to wear the veil is eastern culture too, is that okay? Just because it's your culture doesn't mean it's okay, plus she went to live in Germany, so she better adapt, she is not in her country, anyway she ended up linking with someone just like her... sad and undeveloped. @@CupcakeStudioVoiceover

[@Frivals]

So prostitute

[@Mn16Cr45]

Germany is multicultural

[@_NCO]

Funny for the Ukrainian refugee to be acting the way she is doing..... not willing to adapt in any any any way at all

[@TheZnjora]

Lol people shouldn't date anyone from a different culture if they are not ready to adapt. It's well known fact that Germans, and western men in general don't pay for shit. I mean, I don't blame them, toxic feminism in their world literally destroyed their mindset. Anyways, I understand Ukrainian girl because us Eastern Europeans are more traditional, and still raised in patriarchy. So, our men mostly get offended if we offer to pay, especially on first dates, they wouldn't allow it. 😂

[@marvin2678]

wait youre against feminism but also tslk negative about a patriarchy ?

[@TheZnjora]

@@marvin2678 how in the hell did you come up with those conclusions?🤣 I'm always for healthy feminism as it used to be in the beginning, not this western shit nowadays. I was just stating few facts about differences between Western and Eastern cultures when it comes to dating, since everyone is coming after the Ukrainian girl in the comments. She's used to certain approach back home, tried smth new, didn't like it, end of story.

[@TheZnjora]

@@Laxtovik Sure, if you say so✌️

[@marvin2678]

@@TheZnjora yeah fair point, seems i just got a wrong impression based on your comment... yeah she seems a bit old fashioned but hey if thats her preference and she keeps herslef to those standards

[@joeschmoe138]

@@marvin2678 Eastern Europe is matriarchy, by patriarchy they mean men who do all their bidding against other men and are allowed to be the traditional "dominant" partners.

[@silveryfeather208]

No hate on others but it never made sense to me when men pay. What do women bring to the table then???? Unless you are willing to do more domestic affairs for him, it doesn't make sense now.

[@princessdaya5781]

traditionally its meant to show that the man can provide for the woman and take initiative

[@silveryfeather208]

@@princessdaya5781 except women can provide for themselves now. So what do they bring? Also not everyone wants to raise kids and more the power to them. But if women can forgo their duty why can't men?

[@SRBOMBONICA86]

​@@silveryfeather208just stick to western white women

[@silveryfeather208]

@@SRBOMBONICA86 I mean I'm a bi woman but why?

[@princessdaya5781]

@@silveryfeather208 people who dont aspire to raise children and start families are useless socially and biologically. hope this helps

[@oznuraygen7254]

Boring people, no thank you

[@timarinkin4788]

Don't be a man and everything gonna be alright

[@lesgibson969]

3:12 man should pay = im eskort

[@erzascarlet5078]

So your mom’s an eskort? Well judging based on how you’re trynna delusionally pass off your body fat as “muscles” I’m not surprised.

[@cobrakaineverdies5006]

Not really. Escorts give you something in return. Do you think that lady goes to bed with everyone who pays her dates? Most of them she likely ghosts after having received her free meal.

[@PaulaOx]

Women should split bills = I'm a broke man child

[@cobrakaineverdies5006]

@@PaulaOx even if I was bill gates I wouldn’t pay a random woman anything, why should I 😁😁😁outside of friends and family I only pay if I get something in return.

[@PaulaOx]

@@cobrakaineverdies5006 then go get a prostitute. Less hassle

[@umarsidi1272]

Basically they are too woke

[@user-jw1bl4hq9j]

People from different counties DO NOT HAVE THE SAME DATING/ marriage thinking……I did it and was a disaster …..date and marry only in your own country .

[@justalostcause4425]

men should pay imo

[@vesyolaya_oleshka]

"If I were broken, I would expect him to pay" - no, baby, you sound broken by saying this... Too much showing off and trying to prove smth makes them look like they feel being not worth to be invited and paid for 🤷

[@TabeaSerenety]

Her words "if i'm broke, *it's nice if someone else pays but i can pay for myself* " and you changed it to "would expect him to pay" ...🤷😂

[@sienna9743]

She's does not say 'broken', she says 'broke', which means without money.

[@SRBOMBONICA86]

Not interested in Germans at all,in my opinion Germans should date other germanics,we should all stick with our people

[@augth]

wtf

[@Baphomet-bk7cx]

Agree

[@PowerControl]

Also staying at the places where they are born?

[@luciawa5815]

German dating culture is just ruined

[@anthonyp9591]

I'm half German and half American (south florida--caribbean and latino influence) so I guess I have the best of both worlds...i'm not macho but know how to be when need be, i like my personal space but i also like touching and I know when it's appropriate or inappropriate, i can be complimentary but not overtly...as far as paying the bill..I usually pay the bill but that's because i usually invite her out...

[@metaman1546]

Idk why Germans still put Latinos and Spaniards in the same box as it's like comparing a Scottish person with an American, two very different nationalities from two very different parts of the globe. However, the preference for Latino women is mostly based on looks, neither an average German man, nor a female from e.g. Colombia will be able to have flawless and smooth conversations being flexible, witty and speak their minds in English as they would in their native tongues so in most cases the language barrier makes everything automatically super friendly, just pay attention the next time you hear 2 different nationalities communicate in English, it's always a lot of "hihihi and hahaha" without the same intensity and energy as it might have in a monocultural encounter.

[@bigsasha500]

Latino means “those of Latin” culture. That means “Spaniards” get put in the same basket as French, Italians, Romanians, Mexicans etc etc.

[@metaman1546]

@@bigsasha500 You are misinformed friendo, Latino exclusively refers to ppl from Latin America, it's universally known and Europeans from Spain, Italy or Romania don't have anything to do with this category at all, they are caucasian people from the EU and most Spaniards would look at you funny if u said that in their presence, because it makes you look either ignorant or uneducated. I assume you don't speak Spanish, but what do you think the Spaniards themselves call people from Latin America?? Latinos! Do your research (;