This ADHD Advice Changed My Life...

🔥 Create an ADHD-Friendly Morning Routine that WORKS: geni.us/adhd-m...
Here's what you can do when you feel like ADHD is taking over your life.. and ruining it. It happens to the best of us, but we have each other and we're here for you!
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👋🏻 Hi, I'm Antonia - an ADHD Coach with 4+ Years of Experience 👋🏻
Using my scientific background and ADHD expertise, I help you rebuild confidence and live your happiest life - the ADHD-friendly way!
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Thank you!

[@AntoniasUniverse]

👋🏻Don't be shy, say HI! It could change your life! ...And if you want to try ADHD coaching stop BY: antoniatheuniverse.com/coaching

[@jeffrey_jpeg]

This helps me feel more like a human, and less of some side piece to society. I have struggled with this for so long that I normalized the idea of being "dumb", "lazy", "weird", and so on. I just want to be me, but the best me I can be for myself and those that genuinely accept me for who I am. Those few people see how creative, loving, and intelligent I am.

[@AntoniasUniverse]

I bet you're a super kind, loving, and interesting human! I can just tell from the way you wrote this 😁 You're probably one to talk to about anything and everything for hours. No matter what the capitalist society or whatever may think of you, what you have is special, and needed in this world. We need all different kinds of people to create new things together and actually make progress, but most people only appreciate that in hindsight... Please care for and nurture yourself as you are, so you can show up in the world unfiltered, and those who appreciate you can enjoy the awesomeness! ❤️

[@RobertGottlieb]

Antonia is so right about this! I and I'm sure other ADHDers definitely will see those qualities. and fully believe they are true! I know what that feels like! It took me until I was 24 to figure out I have ADHD! I had many around me telling me "If you could just try harder..." bleh! Anyway, you sound awsome!

[@lv9265]

So thankful you're not sponsored by BetterHelp! And that you're real about them. Some of my favorite mental health youtubers keep getting sponsorships with them and it makes me mad.

[@roar40s]

I believe ADHD is essentially an addiction, or anti addiction. Where what you are normally addicted to are things that you can't stop doing, it is instead an addiction to the thoughts that prevent you from following though on tasks or even starting them. The key is to recognise that this is what is going on in your head so you can push through and get some more stuff done. I see ADHD as a parasite in my brain, controlling my thoughts. And I hate being controlled!

[@patjakker6730]

You can overcome an addiction on sheer will power, the withdrawal will faint and then you can function properly, you can beat ADHD on will power but you'll never overcome it, but as soon as you stop fighting it, your life/world will collapse, so fighting it al day every day is what you "must" do, but this isn't a real option because you'll burnout.

[@chriswoyce6285]

I really enjoy your content👍🏻 I was just wondering how you feel about Jordan Peterson comments on boys with ADHD. If you don’t get back to me, it’s all good.

[@conceptofeverything8793]

I agree with Jordan that ADHD is created by schools. If it werent for the education system and work system, ADHD wouldn't be a thing. We would be gathering berries and living in the bush, just as we used to, because those are the conditions where ADHD people thrive. We wouldn't be considered as symptomatic- we would be valued for who we are instead of what labor we provide. Obviously, being sarcastic. However, he could have just said "fuck feudalism", and spare some words. Cheers. Jordan, if you're reading this, please reconsider whether its the children and diagnostists who are bad, or whether its the system we live in thats wrong.

[@c.neleman6630]

thank you sooooo much, I send this video to my so called ADHD-coach after finishing my consults with him😅

[@AntoniasUniverse]

lmao 😁

[@aenorawyrm3326]

My probably worst problem related to ADHD is that at some point it led me to believe it's not possible for me to finish any serious project. I only recently figured out that I have ADHD because I don't have noticable hyperactivity unless you count idea generation speed, but on the outside I'm extremely calm and peaceful. Once I leared it, I tried pomodoro, but with different timings, usually 10 minutes work - 10 minutes rest - 15 work - 10 rest - 20 work - etc, because starting from 10 or even 5 minutes helps if I fear the task, but then slowly increase time if I see it's not too bad. And it worked, I finished my 1st short story this way ...... and then I got a panic attack when it was time to edit it, because my brain broke down around the fact that finishing projects MUST BE impossible for me. I still can't explain it properly, I currently have to finish editing 2 more chapters and it's going sloooowlyyy, not because boredom, but because of anxiety. I know for sure it's not because I'm afraid to show people the finished story, because I write short pieces that are not full stories and they are well recieved & the bits I showed from the current story even have some fans among my friend group (many ADHD people there btw). It's the thought of breaking through the wall of "I can't do it" that drives me into panic and I hate how irrational it is because my fears are usually way more rational. I can deal with a lot of stuff and fears and problems, but there's usually a clear reason, like I can panic in a croud of people because my trust in people is low after my life experiences etc, as long as there's a rational part to the fear I can evaluate which risks are real and which are not, and slowly drag myself into the safe zone, like hosting a party for only my friends and peole whom my friends trust. But here I have something I currently don't know how to explain at all. Hope this rant helps someone though at the same time I hope no one has to deal with same stuff

[@RobertGottlieb]

ADHD is frequently co-morbid with anxiety and other diseases. But there are other aspects of ADHD that could be at play. I have the combo type of ADHD (both inattentive and hyperactive). It shows up exactly as you described: calm on the outside, a zoo on the inside with thoughts all over the place! My medication (adderall) helps alot with that! I may move to the generic for Vyvanse (we finally have it here in the US!). As far as being anxious. I totally know what that is like! I can totally freeze and not do anything at all in those circumstances. I've learned to get up and just force myself to physically move. That helps. I think my medication helps as well. I typically have more issues when it has worn off. Anyway, I hope you find a way to get help with that. Maybe talking to your ADHD friends (or even ADHDers you meet on here) might help in those instances.

[@AntoniasUniverse]

Hey! Welcome to the community ❤️ and thank you for sharing your Pomodoro hack, it's such a good modification! I have a Pomodoro timer I created on my website, but I only made the breaks have a random length. Now I think I should have made it more like your idea. Maybe I'll change it! Now for your problem: Some common therapy methods focus on those thoughts of "I can't do it" and the fear itself to try to change your thoughts in the hopes of eventually changing your behaviours. Like "once you defeat the fear around it, you'll just do it". And it works for some people, sure, but ADHD is a special case that requires a different approach (like your Pomodoro timers). So: 1. Your fear is completely rational and legitimate - many ADHD-ers, you included, don't complete projects. This project is important to you, so you're afraid. 2. You are allowed to be afraid and it's okay. So what can we do about it? That's the recognition and acceptance part, see what I did there? Now for some actions: 3. Start working on the problem from the root of it - put yourself in the best possible mental and physical state, and the best possible environment to facilitate you doing the editing voluntarily. Don't force it. Rest if you need to. The only thing to be mindful of is distraction. Getting on a KZbin binge might be comfortable, but it's unlikely to produce the desired result. A nice cup of tea and a book might be easier to let go of when you feel ready to do the editing. 4. Once you've tried everything to prime yourself mentally and physically, use your favourite hacks - break down the task and give it a clear goal for your Pomodoros, go to the library, etc. 5. If you're really struggling, enlist someone to body double. This is definitely not an extensive list, but I think it's a good start! Let me know if you have any questions or you want to work on this together in coaching, either way - I KNOW you can do it. PS: Once you KNOW you have ADHD, your life starts over. This is the first time you're doing a big project with this knowledge, so it won't be the same. What I ask people to do after diagnosis is start gathering proof. Something will work when you do things the ADHD-friendly way, and the first time it works is your first piece of evidence that there are other possibilities for you out there, and that you CAN reach them! Then you can use that proof going forward ☺️

[@nkm7859]

big tasks feel unsolvable because you are surrounded by fog and you are only able to see your hands and cant estimate the workload thats needed to fulfill that task. breaking it down in smaller tasks is also hard because of the fear of the unknown and we procrastinate it. in that case its just better to start without knowing the next steps but that leads to misjudgement of priority and time and we run out of energy and time to finish the project before the deadline 😂

[@aenorawyrm3326]

@@AntoniasUniverse Thank you 💕 I'm glad if my modification will help. Here's a bit more detailed reasoning for it: I dislike the idea of 5-minute breaks because my brain needs to go through the cycle of focusing on the new task and then to get bored of it or to finish it naturally. I can imagine 5 minutes working for people on tik-tok, but I'm more of a youtube person so my usual cycle is 8-15 minutes. For longer videos I take breaks, too, so it would feel natural to return to work even if it's not finished during the break. I feel like the reasoning for exact timings should be talked about more, because I knew intuitively that 20 work to 5 rest won't work for me but it took time to understand why. On the other hand, I have longer time until I need a 30-minutes or hour break. I usually decide when I need it on the spot, it happens when it starts to feel like I'm tired from the controlled switching itself and need just to let go for a while and let my process wander. Also if I hate the task with a passion, like cleaning, it's better for me not to make work time more than 5-15 minutes at all, and make the breaks longer. This way my brain is like "oh, just 5 minutes of unplesant and boring, and I get a cleaner room, it's actually not so bad, I can make it without a significant mood drop". About that fear, it's not that I fear that I'll never finish anything that's the main problem (it exists, but yeah it's rational so I can work with that). It's more like how people who were in abusive relationships get panicked when they meet someone who never shows agression (I have a friend who's like that). It's the moment of "wow I can actually do it, I'm almost at the finish line..... it's too good to be true so I must break it" - that's the problem. Currently my plan is to just bruteforce it until this one project is done, and then use that experience as proof that I can do it, but this psychological mechanism of self-sabotage is still the most confusing psychological defence I ever met in myself and others. And I can already confirm it's like life started over, even without meds (no good options where I live), just knowing it's not my fault is enough, I'm not lazy, and I just need to find a way that's different from how I was taught is "correct" way to focus. I found out I have ADHD this winter and I already have a finished 6-chapter story with 2 chapters left to edit while bebore 1-chapter shorts were my limit, or 3-chapter unfinished attempts to start a big novel that don't even count.

[@AntoniasUniverse]

@@nkm7859 Story of my life!

[@fahed101]

Hello Antonias. I have a question, do you take your Adhd medication Vyvanse 50mg with caffeine or without? Thank you

[@PauloRoberto-cr4qh]

Thank you for your work, support and empathy. I'm from Brazil, I do have ADHD, so I've in contact with Dr. Russell Barkley and some other neuroscientists works. I'm here to say to that what you are doing is amazing and so great for so many people that doesn't exist enough words describe. Thanks again for everything that you are doing.

[@RobertGottlieb]

As always, another great video! And I love hearing about the hubby! He sounds awesome! I like the idea of making more ADHD friends. So feel free to contact me. I am a techie (Cloud Platform Engineer), love Prog Metal, have 5 cats, a dwarf holland lop ear bunny, and now a pitbull/Labrador or ?? mix. My daughter (almost 18) has ADHD and is a Lesbian so I'm also LGBTQIA+ friendly. I'm Jewish. So hopefully something in there is common with someone else. Also, for any of you that are wondering if you can do anything. I'm 55 yrs old. I'm in the US (Charleston, SC) but grew up in Maryland. I grew up in a time when ADHD wasn't even known about. I was labeled Learning Disabled and my parents were left with no help. To their credit they got me tutors and diagnostic testing to try to help me. And with all that was against me back then in terms of academics, I managed to graduate with a B.S. in Computer Science in '94. It took me 5 yrs, but no one asks how many years it took. Nowadays degrees aren't always necessary anyway. The point is, I believe you can do whatever you think you can't. Just don't get stuck in having it to look neurotypical. I don't program the same way other programmers do. But I get the job done. Anyway, thank you Antonia as always for your awesome presence on KZbin/Web!

[@AntoniasUniverse]

Yeees, we are each other's biggest asset! I've never felt so accepted and normal in my life. So good job for sharing about yourself, Robert! 🙌🏻 I hope a few people can relate to your incredible story, cause I definitely can! 😅 I LOVE animals, prog metal and inclusivity! And it took me 5 years to get my B.Sc. in computer science too! Of course, nobody asked how long it took after. We are on our own timeline. The acceptance and freedom one reads in your words is inspiring. You are a great model for the community, Robert! We all deserve to treat ourselves a little nicer. Thank you for always being so kind and supportive!! ❤️

[@kaushendra_]

ⁱⁿᵈⁱᵃⁿˢ

[@alimovahed619]

Anyone from Iran?😅

[@georgipopov4409]

Hey Antonia, You have a great channel and I'm glad there are people like you helping others in need. I am from Bulgaria and really here ADHD is some kind of myth for psychologists and psychiatrists, I found one who deals with this condition and I hope I have some result. I wish you greetings and success in life :)

[@AntoniasUniverse]

Hey, thank you for sharing! It's one of my dearest goals to make ADHD less of a taboo back home in Bulgaria and enable lovely people like you to get access to medication (without being diagnosed as children), and to have access to more types of medication too... Така се радвам, че все пак си намерил някой, с когото да поговориш. Дано да ти помогне! Ако някога имаш въпроси или искаш да препоръчаш човека на други които ме питат, напиши ми мейл, ще се радвам! ☺️ Успех!

[@lv9265]

Hey, could you please tell me the name of the professional? Would that be okay?

[@GoADHDGo]

How am I suppose to pay attention to what you’re saying when I can’t stop admiring your awesome home?

[@AntoniasUniverse]

Nawww, thank youuu! I actually live in the one from the intro 😅 I'm currently travelling and I am IN LOVE with this place too. Environment is so incredibly important for me. You have great taste! 😁

[@GoADHDGo]

@@AntoniasUniverseThe house in the first 18 seconds is awesome. It’s like a playhouse with lots of angles and I’m all for it.

[@AntoniasUniverse]

@@GoADHDGo Aww! Thank you!

[@The-xp4xj]

youre really bad at giving advice

[@conceptofeverything8793]

She's not. >÷(