We all have that one friend who... | Episode 134

[@lettienahole]

If you can't afford a party, don't have it. I won't invite people to my birthday and expect them to pay unless if they want extra things not catered for. I am also not expecting anyone to invite me to their birthday party and expect me to pay. It's giving living beyond your means I beg

[@dorahmulinge3800]

This ❤❤❤❤. I don't know why people can't get it

[@careymumbe7130]

Exactly 💯

[@GambaWithJ]

My thoughts too

[@The_Introverted_Pisces]

Exactly

[@brendalevinnah]

Well said,it’s not a basic need to have a birthday party 🤷‍♀️

[@BandarEms]

That one friend whose house is always burning and you ALWAYS support them but when it’s your turn they ghost you. Dropped immediately!

[@DrRuthMwangi]

😂😂infact block them

[@marykitemeoloo6033]

Absolutely 💯

[@angelayez9114]

Paying or not paying for birthday: It depends on what you are accustomed to. Inviting people for birthday should be paid for by the person inviting, the expectation might be that atleast friends bring gifts. However, in my friendships, we usually agree to go for birthday dinners for each other and everyone pays for themselves. We all contribute to pay for cake and cater for birthday person’s bill.

[@fridah2568]

I concur with you swthrt this is it

[@jacklinekendikinoti]

That one friend who always shows up for every group event without fail to support. Love you bestie ❤❤

[@emmamumo4643]

The one who is always single with great relationship advice😅

[@ANM657]

Frenemies are the worst!!! From the passive aggressive behavior, the secret competition, sharing of stuff you’ve told them in secret to other groupies, lack of boundaries , not able to genuinely celebrate your wins yet you've always been there for them during all their wins, those who copy you but behave like they don't, and also will celebrate others for doing the same thing as you, just not you!!!

[@jennykelma]

i totally relate

[@justgracious3196]

I can totally relate too and yooh it's bad

[@magalienia6958]

The Worst...to the left...exit friendship.

[@FayKay348]

This is my favourite episode for very selfish reasons lol. I lost my best friend two weeks after I got engaged. My wedding is in August, and I have never really sat down to think about our friendship, until today. Y’alls friendship is so familiar, it’s a little scary. Reminds me of our friendship and absolutely put a smile on my face. Right now we would have been watching together and naming friends that fit in each of these categories 😂😂😂😂. She was the most beautiful soul I have ever met, and I kept hearing her commentary with each point, and it made me so happy. I am turning 30 in July, and I don’t think I have the heart to start over with anyone else. I am happy to live vicariously through you two :)

[@faithmugendi9774]

Sending you hugs ❤ Congratulations on your upcoming wedding 🎉 I'm also grateful that you got to experience an amazing friendship with your friend

[@gloriaacan9005]

❤❤❤❤you write so beautifully about your friendship, it sounds like it was so beautiful. Happy to hear about your wedding coming up, I wish you well.

[@learnwithme322]

Sending you love sis! Glad you're able to reminder your friend with so much love and happiness!❤ I can relate because I have a friend just like that- we laugh, gossip, cry and do sensible things TOGETHER!😂❤

[@BintiPritty]

Love and light sis ❤❤

[@Nyakioem]

I am sorry that you lost them. Friendship loses hurt the most. All the very best for your upcoming wedding.

[@TheNaisenya]

I don’t mind people being themselves but in a restaurant, or other public services, there are some basic social courtesies. I am just trying to enjoy my soup without having to loudly hear about a stranger’s breakups, traumas, office gossip etc 😒

[@sarahgoretty2103]

40:20 Murugis face when Lydia was clapping for her for being the best gossip mate 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@MercyWanjiku-xr3df]

Like a cute little baby☺️

[@anitatsaura4707]

We all have that one friend who has insecurities when it comes to her man🤦🏽‍♀️

[@maureenmurket4570]

You can always say on the invitation “this is a self funded event” (if you want people to pay their own bills) 😊

[@dianahwambui238]

As a person who currently resides in diaspora it’s just the culture here that ppl are expected to pay for their own food and drinks when invited to a restaurant for a birthday party/ personally I think it’s important that people know in advance that ..thy will pay for food and drinks or either….loved the episode ❤

[@flavia1394]

On the birthday thing, my thing is if its a party then you should cater for it i.e party in your house but I will still ask to be sure. If its a dinner I assume I am paying but I usually ask whether it is catered for just to be sure and budget. We should never be afraid to ask just because we're afraid of how we'll be perceived. As Just Ivy says, we are no longer afraid of speaking about money. If I can afford to cater for it then I will, otherwise the invitation will say come prepared to pay so that you can budget and decide whether you'll be able to attend or not. I guess its something normal with my friends as well so its not awkward or weird. Lets all try be open, not affording something is not a crime guys kwanza na hii economy heh SPEAK UP!.

[@beatriceawinja503]

When I invite friends to my birthday party It's definitely paid for. I'd expect gifts which in essence could be in form of envelopes or wine or just something, don't come empty handed.

[@Fidey_Kokonya]

frenemies piss me off for sure,weird comments and those friends whom have nothing to say when i share my wins.

[@magalienia6958]

Backhanded compliments.

[@andrewlemayian]

For birthdays it’s simple, make it clear as Murugi says therefore this means that if you expect people to pay for their own food and drink, don’t expect a gift on top especially if it’s a high end restaurant. let the gift be a pleasant surprise just like you catering for everyone would be a pleasant surprise if u decide not to be clear in ur invite and as an adult you shouldn’t be going anywhere without money even if it’s been catered for.

[@hinesightmind]

That one friend who complains about everything/nothing... she had to go.😅 hooked already.

[@kihararosa]

BIRTHDAY PARTY;- payment depends on parts.Eg. Out of town, you’re not expected to pay for transport to(by road😀) and food but pay for your room.

[@FayKay348]

I always bring my wallet with me and assume I will be catering for myself and the birthday person at the very least. However, where I am, it is common for people to be completely straight forward on the invite if guests are expected to cater for themselves. It’s called a BYOP (Bring Your Own Pocket) event

[@flavia1394]

Brilliant. Like just say and let me prepare myself in time

[@phoebethambu2674]

I'm a listener on Spotify but now that I'm here, ofc I have to take a moment and comment! I appreciate your beauty ladies

[@joyceyugi9266]

On the birthday issue, in my opinion it's perfectly okay to ask your invitees to contribute however much or however less depending on the plans at hand. If you can cater for all your guests that's absolutely great, but if you're not in that position you can definitely ask.

[@TrizahAtieno-oj1kr]

That one friend who always eats slowly and now we are left with no choice but wait for her,,,I'm always like gal finish up we got somewhere else to be like five minutes ago

[@christinewangechi7675]

😂😂I'm that friend

[@lynnieeve]

I'm that friend 🤭

[@BintiPritty]

This is so funny 😂😂😂😂

[@muthonigathaku]

Why am I this friend 😂😂😂

[@joyceyugi9266]

You can put stuff like BYOB (buy your own bottle) or you can just include what'll be provided instead of what will not be provided on the invite. For example, snacks menu or drinks menu or food menu

[@shillahnnaji4810]

Add me in those friendship groups that discuss TMI.. I'd love to be a part of one and I don't have friends who watch

[@eberelilian7790]

Sameeeeeeee😩

[@FayKay348]

Lost my best friend last year unexpectedly, but I love watching real, pure and genuine friendship. She actually got me on to you guys. Much Love from Australia ❤️💕

[@tmipodcastke]

Sorry about that, hugs 🫂

[@graciakinyanjui6937]

Hugs gal

[@User08882]

I feel like if you are going to have a dinner you must pay for the food and atleast one drink(because alcohol is expensive people can buy themselves the rest). I mean you get to pick the time, the place of YOUR choice (most probably YOUR affordability) and sometimes the theme. That means your friends must make provisions for getting themselves there, buying you a gift, adhering to your theme basically making YOUR vision a reality and they are still expected to pay for their own meal? No ways. Food is honestly the bare minimum and if you cannot to fulfil your own vision then you shouldn’t place that financial burden on your friends. If they choose to help you then great but YOUR dinner, YOUR vision, YOUR money babes.

[@muyinzasophia7302]

We all have that friend who will always forget your birthday year after year even when u celebrate theirs and gift them every year.

[@mwendenyaga91]

Ebu tuache jokes btw... birthday si ni yako.Same as a graduation party. So please pretty girlie cater your own cost.. we'll come celebrate 😅

[@LeanetWanjiru]

I feel like about the birthday it's good to communicate like I'd fail to come to someones party if I don't have enough for the specific location but I'd tell the person yes but it's hard to but as the planner it's good to say this are your friends they know your financial capacity so they won't judge you for just saying you will be paying for your meals.

[@winniewangui9661]

This topic is so timely, I'm in the middle of cutting of fake friends l've decided I'd rather have 1 genuine friend than a bunch of people who pretend to be there for you, I recently lost my phone I've been in a tough situation for 3 months but only 1 friend was checking on me via my katululu, while the rest started engaging when I was back online, I felt it my time to analyze who's genuinely there for me.

[@taniaosano3949]

Sorry for this. Been in the same situation too. Totally relatable. Sometimes we have to re-evaluate ourselves and pray to get genuine kind friends with good heart

[@victoria_aa]

In my opinion, if you decide to throw a birthday party, you should cater for it. The people you invite can bring you gifts. Its the same way when you invite someone on a date, you pay for the date. I feel the same way about weddings. I don't advocate for wedding committees. People can gift you money or even decide to contribute towards your wedding but it shouldn't be mandatory. If you can't afford to have a birthday party, wedding , ruracio etc, don't have it.

[@preciousagema-zk1rk]

So interesting 😂 When Lyd said "security si mbaya vile unaweza jilinda😂😂had me on the floor 😂

[@sharonmirara4646]

😂😂😂😂😂same

[@wk4193]

One should pay for the birthday party they have planned. If it is a suprise by your friends you won't spend even a dime if you are the one throwing it you should cater for it 100%

[@annewacuka]

This epidode was so good, I've laughed so hard at the office 😂😂😂 About paying for a friend's birthday party, I don't mind it. However, I appreciate knowing beforehand if I'm paying or not. PS: I had a house party for my birthday last year and I asked people to bring drinks, but food was provided. So I think it's really important to manage people's expectations.

[@TheNaisenya]

Maybe Nancy should start an anonymous blog on all the gossip, XOXO 😅

[@faithmugendi9774]

Fr 😂😂😂 We need the teeeea

[@dorahmulinge3800]

😂😂😂I support

[@nzendibyange3193]

I have a friend who has more and does better but always acts poor and always wanting things for free from us. You go to her house you take things like food or drinks, she comes to yours empty handed and leaves with packed food asking if you don’t drink that alcohol can I take it, any spare perfumes, any clothes 🙆🏿‍♀️ sooo uncomfortable and never know how to approach it

[@katewamuyu2465]

Sheeeeesh😢 who is this person. They ought to do better.

[@brendamutai5994]

That one friend that tells everyone your staff 😢😢 I unfriended them tho, am healing 😢

[@tmipodcastke]

Unfriend immediately 😮‍💨

[@ANM657]

Ooh yes... this one is so tiring! Your business is shared with everyone, from their therapist to their other friends, mum, sister/brother and anyone willing to give them a listening ear. Exhausting... you walk around knowing your business is out there with people forming opinions of you based on shared stuff

[@nellie15]

OMG do we all have the same friends 😂😂😂😂. If you have a friend that ALWAYS talking and spilling other people's business just be assure they are telling yours. I decided that I would rather be in my own space then surrounded by such fake people.

[@jessicamining2401]

The worst type of people for sure 🚮🚮🚮

[@Reggie-DIY]

This episode was so fun for me...😂To be honest, it has really helped me evaluate who I am as a friend. If that makes sense . Good one, my Pisces human❤

[@RuvimboDadi]

Loved this episode!!! On the birthday bill thing I’d expect to pay for my own meal. Unless if it’s a buffet thing where I’m hosting at home or a place of my choice etc. if I’m financially able to, I’d want to also pay for the birthday girl. Weddings etc, I think that’s very different.

[@RahaBaraka]

The day Lyd will be pregnant...😢😢... y'all are the sweetest.i love you two much!.

[@kobbykanyu148]

We all have that one friend who makes us laugh in serious situations😂

[@maureenmuthoni7078]

For birthday dinners, i would attach the invite with a menu for the restaurant/hotel. That way it will be self explanatory and friends can budget accordingly. If its a party, then i will cater for everything.

[@Spinkly]

I expect to pay for my own dinner when going to a restaurant to eat for a friend’s birthday. If it’s a house party most probably not but either way I come prepared.

[@anneo3931]

Hello lovely ladies, when it comes to birthday invitations here in the west, it's customary for guests to cover their own expenses. This was quite a shift for me as I'm accustomed to birthday celebrations being entirely hosted by the birthday person. Since they're your friends, perhaps you could inform them that the menu options range from $45 to $60 per person, etc. That's how I would handle it.

[@sylviawanjiru178]

I totally relate to your comment 😊.. we come with gifts and still pay for the brunch/package listed

[@suzannewanjaria7436]

For invitations for events where you want to guests to pay the recommended etiquette for wording is "This is a no host party" or "No Host Party" only included when you are not catering for your guests. If you are catering for your guest nothing is required.

[@jennifernjeri7340]

I would pay to have my friends have the best experience. It is just one day and my friend's are top tier all year round.

[@saumunassir7975]

i like you😍😍

[@SeeShells79]

My life is back to normal. Although you’ve been back for weeks, I just want to reiterate how much I appreciate your presence in my Wednesday morning ❤

[@xoxomacx2539]

Food and drinks provided, or food provided, if it doesn’t say this then you know you are expected to pay.

[@AgnesGichigi]

We all have that friend who thinks you cant leave without them ,girl please

[@magalienia6958]

😂

[@nomfunekomgotyibana5699]

Watching this episode, I am now wondering weather is it because I have few friends, or I choose very good quality friends because I cannot relate to most things. I enjoyed the episode so much!!!

[@whitneynaliaka3556]

When Murugi said about that suitcase friend😂😂if you haven't experienced this then you havent had full blown delulu female friends😂😂😂

[@sharonmirara4646]

😂😂😂😂😂

[@brendalevinnah]

I enjoyed this episode 😊💯 I feel like for birthdays,don’t have a party if you can’t afford it.. and also(unpopular opinion)yes I agree,the same for weddings.. if people want to have a committee let it be for the gifts. Wanipee hiyo mchango like a gift.

[@DrRuthMwangi]

There's always that one friend who gossips about your issues to others 😂😂😂. Behave Please 😂😂

[@salma.shaban_y]

Loveeeed this episode so much! As much as I saw so many where I was like ‘hmmmm! This is giving so and so’ I had to sit down and be like ‘Okay Salma, what is your trait that you think YOUR friends would have a problem with’ 👏🏽 Lovely job ladies ❤️

[@destinewangechi6054]

It's 10:46pm and I really want to go watch this episode with my friend tomorrow but am already 40min in I can't stop😭😭😭am trying guys I really am

[@AgnesGichigi]

We all have that friend who asks you for money but they don't want to pay back and when you ask them they get angry and remind you of the things they have done for you in the past. Girl you said your man is rich get money from him😢

[@sharonmirara4646]

😂😂😂😂

[@linetwambui7491]

Those friends that play with your money really suck!! Not good buddy

[@nicolechemutai5603]

1:03:06 you can just say ......food is catered for, drinks not inclusive on the invite😂😂😂

[@claudiakananu3465]

I think it is okay to cut off friends who are always complaining about their partners who they are not willing to leave. Such friendships can be draining

[@nalwovie954]

Haha on that matter of birthdays and paying, for us over here in Uganda; people usually add “everyone will cater for their food & drinks. Thanks. See you there😊” and then share the restaurant menu👏🏾😂 It should be okay to spend money celebrating your friend pls!👏🏾

[@marythuo8404]

I now believe that the tea Lyd and Murugi share is hotttt 😂😂😂 you guys hadi mnaenda off the mic 😅🔥.. TMI to the world

[@cikiwaki]

Go to your house for privacy 😂😂 Lydiah 😂😂😂 I love it!

[@Cikanyoro]

I agree with Nancy have a party that you can afford.

[@MaryWangui-b4q]

One of my inspirational girls is Lydia Kim I have really grown since I started listening to this podcast 😊😊

[@royalty_11]

It's definitely TMI🎉my Wednesday highlight

[@wambo.lately]

Not me watching up to the end na i don't have friends 😢

[@carolinenjoroge1195]

😅😅😅 me too

[@shikokariuki212]

Me toooo...

[@nursemuthoni]

Oh dear😢

[@emiliajerutocheserek8439]

That one friend who gets too clingy with every man you hook up with🚮

[@andabwarosekiarie5477]

I love it when Lydia speaks in Swahili 😂😂😂😂..it sounds like a little baby speaking aaw❤

[@gladyschepchumba2395]

One of my best episodes yet, I kept rewinding to hear the tea over and over .. ❤ tmi

[@shiisquad]

The Lydia one is legit scary, I always want to do it but nope not today. Ati'" hi guys' at java" wuehh ,anxiety would kill me.

[@michellewairimu3392]

Hey Girliiesss!Thank you for this episode really hits😂I lost my best friend around last year in October cause she didn't attend my graduation and i was planning the whole event with her.I was so disappointed and decided you know what I'm dropping her cause she had missed most of my events and was always making excuses when i invite her to things.I'm always wondering though did i make the right choice?!

[@KarenGasheri]

on the birthday paying point, i think by saying food and drinks on/not on the house is a bit better.

[@Its_at.ieno12]

The best part of my Wednesday every week. Love you ladies 😊❤

[@tmipodcastke]

Love you right back 🫶🏽

[@Ayanaa_20]

That one friend who wants you to be successful but not successful more than them 😢..weh

[@MtotowaNjuru]

If it's someone's birthday,let them communicate the expectation so that we can prepare for it in advance

[@princessly_precious]

That one friend saying hi to one k people on the road 😂😂 now we are all waiting and running late

[@Itscha254]

If it would be my birthday, I would buy a cake and pay for the drinks, but everyone plays for what they eat

[@nzendibyange3193]

Friends who are always trying to out shine you 😅 relax babe we can all shine ❤️

[@learnwithme322]

If you "invite" people, you should pay! But if you say, can we get together at restaurant A, then everyone knows they're paying for themselves. Also there's no shame in asking people to "bring your own drink" to a lunch you're hosting.

[@agnesodoyo854]

If you invite people for your birthday, you need to pay for the bill. But if you're not paying, say in advance. So that you don't shock people with a bill at the end of the birthday. I have actually experienced this, thank God I had some cash so I paid for my bill, but that was Money that I had budgeted for.

[@BeatriceKarimi-xg5ti]

Lydia "you can defend yourself against thieves" got me😂😂😂

[@Augenia]

This friend after umepost like uko na birthday she be like ntakuja niadd Kwa group and they never show up😢drop them

[@petronillahmatheri3947]

I am the friend who is always single 😂😂 my man better find me ! Now that y'all out here are making it a "thing"! Never disrespected any of my friend's marriages though 😊

[@cyndigomboya4230]

❤❤😂😂 I so love the conversation🎉🎉

[@Mitchyn]

I dont think its good for your friend to cater for good in your birthday instead they should bring gifts instead

[@graciakinyanjui6937]

You gals looks smart ... cute outfit...

[@agnesodoyo854]

I am that friend who rarely calls....😢😢😢 Yet I always feel guilty for not calling but don't know how to change this behavior.😢

[@JackieBirungi-eq7le]

Love the conversation ladies . Love from uganda

[@eberelilian7790]

My friend who invited me to her birthday last year did that personally and not via invite, and she made mention that drinks were covered but food wasn’t. She just said it and there was no big deal. Somehow I just know what party to budget for and what party not to and I’ve never been wrong😂

[@NicoleOmutanyi-iu1vg]

Dont you think that some friendships could thrive at a later time and not now?

[@harmony3297]

Less than 30minutes in🥳❤️❤️❤️always love your episodes. So insightful🥰

[@makena_kinoti]

Petition to have Nancy on set. Hatumsikii vizuri 😂

[@tehillarbanda1930]

Love this episode ❤

[@nyatichiomwenga2536]

What's that French word Lyd used in minute 30;10?Jenesekwa or?😅😅

[@GambaWithJ]

I am always the single one since it's been 7years😅

[@WynnieK]

Hey Inbetweeners💃💃💃.The weekly TMI dose is here😊

[@tmipodcastke]

You know it 🥳

[@malkiawaalego2552]

Not the cousin smasher 🤣 🤣 🤣

[@FayKay348]

That friend who is jealous of your other friends, when she is actually too occupied to participate in any of the things she is jealous of. Unashamedly 🙋🏾‍♀️

[@aisha_ambundo]

Unfortunately I am that kind of a friend...but that last part of not being available for them I can't relate

[@michelleagidza267]

Everyone truly needs a friend like LYD!!!!💜

[@jewel6476]

We all have that friend who your man wants to sleep with💀💀💀💀