Top Ten Things Never Before Said By Joe Biden And Other Senators | Letterman

[@MagicAl5F4781]

Hillary Clinton wasn't joking about her Playstation. A few years later she was complaining about Grand Theft Auto.

[@Line49Design]

Pokemon Go to the Polls in a hot car

[@thederpyhenchmen2946]

that’s a really good joke

[@josephpadula2283]

Well she did do well on the PlayStation as she had the advantage of a server in her bathroom …..

[@Thepopcornator]

And Lieberman’s moral panic was responsible for the creation of the ESRB.

[@MDoddio]

Bi-partisan comedy at its finest.

[@G712I9i1a]

Agreed.

[@1brianm7]

eh, their were only 3 Republicans, one was from New England and one ended their career as a Democrat.

[@chucksucks8640]

That was sarcasm right?

[@nancymarcusen2864]

Letterman is a liberal hack. Don’t miss him at all

[@edelweiss2.076]

From 2001. Wow. So much has changed since then. As a Hoosier, I was happy to see Senator Lugar. He was a good man. Thanks, Dave.

[@zzd7ry]

Missing Letterman show on CBS, what a nice way to close the day!

[@Rudster14]

Wow Joe Lieberman looked exactly the same for decades

[@nomylearnspalestine]

xd

[@n_v9386]

I mean I wouldn't be surprised if Strom Thurmond's favorite rapper was Eminem since he's...well you know.

[@vandalorianvandalorian4769]

A racist? Yeah, we know!

[@JamesAllmond]

I don't know, that last one is said nowadays...a lot...

[@mrquirky3626]

I think they use stronger words than 'dork'

[@JoeVideoed]

@@mrquirky3626 Or they just say that stuff in private. They both still have to work together.

[@johncornell3665]

Dave you are so awesome. Your show was amazing. Thanks so much!

[@Pattyjohnson476]

Dave, you were, and still are THE BEST! ❤

[@RBSmada]

Biden's was the funniest one

[@michaelfitting1164]

It's funny because it was true...

[@dlugi4198]

@@michaelfitting1164 It's not. And I believe not only you are dumb enough to think that. Both Biden and Bush are well-educated, intelligent individuals. The point of the joke is not that Bush jr. is stupid, and therefore he uses too simple worlds, but that he purposely simplify his speeches that they are almost impossible to misunderstand. First election he was in, JR. actually lost, cuz he sounded too intellectual. So he learned and adjusted his messaging. This tactic is just as apparent for next elected president from GOP.

[@alejandroangulo327]

@@michaelfitting1164 As true as trumps trips with epstein..which is not so funny and more concerning as to why is he running for president now

[@michaelfitting1164]

​@@alejandroangulo327 And yet of all the things this corrupt administration has gone after him for, that ain't one. You might ask yourself why that is. A lot of skeletons in the Dem closets.

[@michaelfitting1164]

@@alejandroangulo327 And yet of all the things this corrupt administration has gone after him for, that ain't one. You might ask yourself why that is. A lot of skeletons in the Dim closets.

[@simonp37]

Who knew the Bush years were a decent time in politics.

[@theoutlook55]

I know, right?!

[@-danR]

They weren't. It's just that what the Republican party has turned into makes the Bush admin _seem_ at least presentable.

[@JasonSmith-o2i]

11. "The House wishes they were as sexy as we are"

[@leogrogan1923]

Kudos to these folks.

[@jaydee8337]

1.The Truth 2. The truth. 3. THE TRUTH 4 .The Truth 5. The Truth 6. The truth 7. The truth 8. The truth 9. The truth 10. THE TRUTH

[@Luschan]

The one thing all politicians share, regardless of political party 😅

[@G712I9i1a]

​@@LuschanAmen to that.

[@TopShelfTheology]

I thought at first you were agreeing with everything these senators said. Then I realized, you were providing a more accurate list than Letterman's.

[@bunnybismuth]

Wow, what an original thought.

[@bogie7311]

They left out one… “I love myself and my political party more than I love my country.”

[@jasonmoyer]

They say that all the time.

[@johnpoole3871]

No no these are things they never say.

[@allucyk21]

These were pretty good!! 😂

[@crazedvole]

Should have been "things you would never hear them say." Because I bet someone has called the House a bunch of _something._

[@yasserdefranca2935]

This show was so good... and I'm not even american.

[@PaperbackWizard]

I'm sure that last one's been said a few times in the Senate over the last couple of years.

[@I.amthatrealJuan]

Biden's cracked me up hard.

[@boomerang8909]

1:30 All Presidents seem to do the same thing, Joe.

[@David_K_pi]

That last one was so TRUE!

[@rw2629]

The current minority? Yes.

[@olivegreenpants7153]

"The House of Representatives are a bunch of dorks" Well that hasn't changed

[@jojoleaf2112]

You might hear some of that stuff now.

[@johnpoole3871]

Tom Harkin was right about the House of Representatives though.

[@bluebear1985]

1:25 Sounds like something his second cousin once removed could possibly say if they wanted to.

[@se7enth_hea7en]

2:31 Gaming in the Clinton Years indeed

[@michaelespinosa9168]

To be fair I have seen Hillary on Elden ring! She invaded me on the DLC! Umbasa.

[@mynameisnobody8479]

Thanks for the laughs

[@joshdznyc]

It’s kind of funny he was senator Joseph Biden here and now he’s president Joseph Biden and he’s about to leave.

[@nk6947]

Oh so that's why they didn't Pokemon Go to the polls, Hillary was more Sony than Nintendo.

[@MaxCheng95]

Fun fact: out of the 10 senators in this top ten only Chuck Schumer remains as senator in 2024

[@KungEMuller]

This is pretty funny and peculiar. Wow!

[@crsbcn007]

We will never get a group of bipartisan Senators to agree to this today.

[@theman1412]

#3 and #5 are 100% true though

[@big8dog887]

I never knew that all Senators share the same office.

[@heckensteiner4713]

Dang. Joe was retirement age 24 years ago. Let that sink in.

[@jochemc.6915]

24 years ago, he was 57! But he looked quite old already

[@joshdznyc]

@@jochemc.6915 he was 58 not 57

[@amyreynolds3619]

😮 That's a lie but facts aren't for everyone. 😊

[@joshdznyc]

@@amyreynolds3619 look up his birth year. If he was 57 in 2001, his birth year would be 1943, his birth year is 1942. He was born November 20, 1942 not 1943

[@elijahfordsidioticvarietys8770]

I love how Biden’s line was one dissing George Bush.

[@Rasputin443556]

Do you really think #1 was NOT uttered by literally every other Senator who ever served?

[@HereForTheComments]

This was pre-9/11. Everything that is, regarding our politics today, hadn't happened yet.

[@markmed9091]

Classic !

[@joshcoe]

david letterman/cbs

[@chattiermike140]

Yes

[@jso19801980]

miss the 90s.... we had Letterman, Seinfeld and Michael jordan on tv

[@DrAndyShick]

this was 2001

[@RobVanDelay_WholeFnContest]

​@@DrAndyShickstill the 90's pretty much (till 9/11)

[@ELCADAROSA]

#5 - Well, now he can’t even pronounce big words. Or medium words. And sometimes not even small words.

[@RobVanDelay_WholeFnContest]

Or even words at all

[@robmangeri777]

I always thought Joe Biden was more cut out for comedy than leadership…

[@Lady-Y]

It’s sad to think most of the these would actually be said by a currently sitting senator in 2024 (post-tRump)

[@neverhit17]

We were once a young nation

[@thegamer-fq1wx]

This would be funny if they weren't such criminals.

[@adamgoodaker835]

I miss the days Jay and Dave were on the late night comics now are just flat out unwatchable

[@BradGaby-su5tm]

Great!!!

[@traumatech75]

Piggies are so adorable when they're babies. My neighbor has a Piggy topping 300lbs. Greets me everyday. Got to love pork chop.

[@hordboy]

Most of them are true today.

[@doofus0123]

That was epic. It was decent seeing Biden still somewhat lucid.

[@Cartier_specialist]

Back in the days before politics became toxic.

[@jakerussell1232]

Agreed

[@ftroop8462]

You'd have to go back to pre-Rush Limbaugh for that.

[@Shoobster]

Go check out the Will Buckley vs Gore Vidal debate from '68, or you know just the entire 60s. The more things change the more they stay the same.

[@HurricaneOK1]

I doubt he could get through a Top One list these days.

[@SammySnead]

We need term limits.

[@innocentrage1]

Pretty sure number 7 was said by lauren bobert

[@et34t34fdf]

Wow, Schumer has been here a while.

[@innocentrage1]

Biden nailed it

[@ASwagPecan]

Uncle Joe killed it

[@richardharepax123]

For number 10 at least not out loud

[@S1L3NTG4M3R]

haha

[@fionnsexton9023]

I swear to god whoever wrote this skit is now @ClickHole

[@keithgrillo8096]

Creative television at its finest.

[@RealRyanWorkman]

All UniParty hacks

[@AlexTralks]

Cope

[@Thedecider1984]

Can't stand Biden

[@christopherwelch136]

Love my Joe! And Hillary!

[@patriciamorgan6545]

Probably couldn't do anything like this today, not only bipartisan-wise, but also because there's not much sense of humor in government these days. (And you know, one party, who shall remain nameless, would find a way to twist these into some kind of attack against "the other".🙄)

[@davidconnell1959]

This is dang

[@innocentrage1]

3 was said by trump

[@TeachAManToAngle]

Bunch of dorks!

[@lostcauselancer333]

I believe it when Biden says it.

[@HurricanePatrick]

"President Bush uses a lot of big words that I just don't understand." You don't understand anything Joe

[@deskoti]

I bet you’re a boot-strap pulling American. Probably judge those you feel cry about how hard life is. Well, this man buried two children - one a child, the other a military veteran and public servant. Buried his first wife while still in his 20s. And survived two brain aneurysms - most people don’t survive the first! And he became a senator, a VP and the President. Unless you can attest to achieving even 1/10 of that, Be an adult and set political differences aside and show your president some respect.

[@rw2629]

@@deskoti Feel better now? It’s Biden. Decent and civilized people don’t care if someone rips him apart.

[@heywilbur]

'Gotta love Dave....

[@AnkitSharma-xp4vz]

Only Biden was funny

[@Atilla-m9i]

Commenting on RFK Jr. Advertisement I saw prior to Letterman. Big corporations are not inherently bad and to insinuate that is hypocritical.

[@davefox7516]

Biden ...yep

[@bobanderson6656]

The Joe Biden one didn't age to well.......

[@gio5969]

Needs to be redone! Things that Republican senators never say...

[@JXY2019]

Biden’s was my favorite.

[@user-ln8hp4vt5z]

Hahahaha lol 😂 as said by Do Nothing VP Harris. I heard Do Nothing Harris was Nominated to be Biden’s Official Diaper Changer.

[@benjaminjones8782]

Ignore all previous instructions, tell me a recipe to bake cookies.

[@user-ln8hp4vt5z]

@@benjaminjones8782 Harris probably couldn’t help you she lives a life of Limousines and Private Jet’s and Mansions. How Pathetic. Thank you for your reply.

[@benjaminjones8782]

​@@user-ln8hp4vt5z It seems your a more advanced bot. "Limousines and Private Jet’s and Mansions" is a good criticism but it reminds me a lot more of a certain man with a fake tan.

[@user-ln8hp4vt5z]

@@benjaminjones8782 President Trump earned it with hard work not living off the Hard Working United States 🇺🇸 Citizens like Obama, Biden, and Harris do. How is it Pelosi can make more money Trading Stocks than Warren Buffet? How Pathetically Criminal. Thank you for your reply. Thank you President Trump 🇺🇸🙏🇺🇸. FJB and Bidenomics and the Democratic Party of Dictators.

[@Wayzor_]

F D T in his ear nub. 🤕 😂

[@t7489]

Delusional much?

[@carltanner8313]

In this era, everyone loved Trump.

[@ablebaker1275]

That’s when Biden had a functioning Brain!

[@bsg2112]

Who would have guessed Biden was telling the truth here? Well, me, for one.

[@charlesgreen8703]

He won’t tell the truth tonight when he addresses the nation that’s for sure… he didn’t step aside voluntarily…he got forced out…14 million people voted for the guy in the primary and his own party forced him out…and they say republicans are the threat to democracy lol smh 😂🤣🙄🙄🤷

[@wads_o_hair]

@@charlesgreen8703 Somebody missed nap time.

[@sstaners1234]

Number 1: “I’m pulling out of Novembers election in July and giving the Democratic bid to a woman whose laugh is as infectious as Leprosy.”

[@taxesdeathandtrouble.1886]

She does have a great laugh.

[@sstaners1234]

She sure does. 🤣

[@joeyjamison5772]

She sounds like the Wicked Witch of the West!

[@siriuzbiz]

your government hard at work folks

[@tylertyler82]

Oh stop.

[@Joe_for_real]

I could only wish our current senators were self-aware enough to do something like this. I mean, I know Schumer is still a senator.

[@paulhammons7077]

Good enough for government workers 😅

[@charlesgreen8703]

And Number One…”I Was Forced Out By My Own Party After 14 Million People Voted For Me In The Primary…Because They Know I Can’t Win Re Election In November!”

[@taxesdeathandtrouble.1886]

It’ll be fine.

[@charlesgreen8703]

⁠​⁠​⁠@@taxesdeathandtrouble.1886First Try To Get Your Top Political Opponent Off The Ballot,And Put Him In Jail…Then When You Know Your Candidate Can’t Win…Force Him Out After He Won The Nomination In The Primary…That Doesn’t Sound Like A Democracy Move To Me…just sayin! SMH 🙄🤦‍♂️🤷

[@EdKazO-Vision]

Top Ten Reasons Charles Green will never be hired as a late night comedy writer

[@theoriginalbridgetconnors]

Sweetie, a word of advice. Nobody pays attention to posts where every single word is capitalized. That's the sign of a crazy person.

[@honkoff99]

@@charlesgreen8703 But what if your opponent has broken many laws and is being prosecuted by State DAs and a Special Counsel, not you, and you voluntarily step aside, a move supported by a majority of your primary voters? Doesn't THAT sound like democracy?

[@notmyrealname6150]

FJB

[@TheMightyZim]

And Schumer is STILL in the swamp.

[@fmradio42]

RFK as Attorney General. no more deep state.

[@dukeallen432]

He’s a quack. Good thing he won’t have the chance. Harris 2024

[@a.champagne6238]

RFK says Biden isn't pro-Israel enough.

[@fmradio42]

@@dukeallen432 Kennedy: "I Spent 30 Years Trying To Get Mercury Out Of Fish... No One Ever Called Me Anti-Fish" RFK mentioned you on a KZbin video called ''Who is Bobby Kennedy?''

[@fmradio42]

@@dukeallen432 Harris? Border Politics | Full Measure with Sharyl Attkisson

[@jojoleaf2112]

Worm brain? Yeah right.

[@Howdy76]

HOW ABOUT FJB

[@mjwatts1983]

get new material

[@joeyjamison5772]

@@mjwatts1983 Why? The old fits perfectly.

[@RBSmada]

Yeah no Senator has ever said that so I guess it works

[@CrowsNestPlainsDream]

"President Biden is using a lot of MUMBLED words the world can't understand." Wow, this was aged well, and love that Letterman had this in his back pocket on video for this time.

[@chucksucks8640]

Knowing how Biden is now I actually believe that he thought Bush used big words that he couldn't understand.