Truly Awful YouTube Shorts

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danny's video - • the weirdest youtube s...
initial research by - Connor "BJ" Hypes linktr.ee/bjhypes
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[@manofthesnails]

this is like watching that one scene in a movie that is clearly just there to satisfy the director's kink but the entire movie is just a compilation of those scenes

[@placeholderdoe]

Exactly

[@daftoptimist]

So it’s a whole KZbin shorts channel of That One Scene from any given Michael Bay movie.

[@bryanmullins379]

The many feet scenes in Dan Schneider's shows

[@NorthernGreenEyes]

Bingo 🎉

[@Ceranyx]

Entirety of space jam 1

[@pestrat_]

I wish KZbin could implement a function making it possible to block shorts altogether.

[@Peayou...]

I hate shorts honestly. KZbinrs have to use them tho

[@pestrat_]

@cs5466 They don't have to. They're heavily incited to though.

[@samukelelubisi]

Yes! I hate how that shelf keeps coming back after 30 days

[@ducky.doodles]

I like to use ngl it's the cringey people who just screen record videos+ these people (it is my job after all lol🤪)

[@mighty_kul8264]

You realize that you don't have to watch them right

[@pastelsheepy]

it gives a weird fetish content vibe too especially like the nurse thing

[@definietlynotowl3607]

its not just vibes my friend this is actual fetish content

[@sarahmckinnell8435]

I was about to comment that all of this screams fetish content

[@ameera.abubakr]

yeah all of this is extremely weird

[@daftoptimist]

At this point I just assume that all unrelatable content like this is some kind of fetish fuel.

[@caitlinweiss8801]

For sure, and this wouldn't be so weird if it were advertised as such and to adults but I don't think most of their viewers are adults...

[@oastics]

every app having a tiktok feature is hell

[@Peayou...]

Tik tok is hell

[@candacefullrv9291]

Fax

[@Tw0Dots]

One of worst The worst app trends to ever happen

[@ItsTooLateForMe]

Honestly, yeah.

[@skeletoneg]

Spotify ☠️

[@tristan9506]

The scene where they’re loudly chatting about the blind woman as though she can’t hear them talking about her? Incredible realism. Happens to me more than any reasonable person would believe possible.

[@alicine-sims8988]

People LOVE to talk crap when they think there is "something wrong" with you that'll prevent you from understanding them. I'm not sure what would bring them to think a blind person couldn't, but maybe they don't think blind people can recognize voices so you wouldn't know who said it? I just remember doing a sign language course where we went out to different places to practice in the real world, but the teacher was the only person aloud to talk. At a restaurant, we all got to listen to a table talk crap about how sad and pathetic we where. Tell my teacher turned to them and said we could all hear them.

[@elizabethr.9359]

Apparently being disabled in general means we can’t hear anymore. I was using my forearm crutch and a guy followed me and whispered to the person I was with within earshot of me “why is she using a cane?” Like can able bodied people be normal for 3 seconds?

[@suneater_zeef050]

ikr, i remember just being there and two people loudly discussing my walking cane that was next to me like i couldn't hear. so weirddd

[@xandermin]

as a blind person, watching sighted people pretend to be blind & use canes will never stop being hilarious, like dgmw it's deeply offensive, but it's also so funny because that is NOT how you use a cane !!!

[@maledictionwolf]

​@Nabi˚I knew a guy who was effectively blind below his waist--he got kicked in the head and his ability to see down stopped working. Dude could see what was in front of his face, but not what was in front of his feet so he needed to use a cane. I also worked with a legally blind girl who could kinda see, her vision was just so bad that even with both glasses and contacts on she needed large print books to be able to read. She didn't use a cane, though.

[@keeweebir]

@Nabi˚ blindness isn’t necessarily black or white, vision impairment is a spectrum

[@TheSylvirr]

@Nabi˚ One of my blind friends is actually an Illustrator. She's legally blind but can see enough to draw. She draws for childrens books. Another one of my friends who is 100% unseeing has a computer with braille keys, and it reads out whatever is on the screen. Thats why you'll sometimes see captions under images explaining what the image is ('A manatee on a seaside background', for example.

[@moonlight51921]

@Nabi˚ so weird of you to say

[@dottyContrarian]

also it can get you arrested.

[@Swedishmafia101MemeCorporation]

KZbin shorts has made me appreciate the existence of the "do not recommend this channel" button

[@abbycantrell1369]

Yours works?!?!?! I try to use that button and KZbin just recommends the channel more!

[@donovanfaust3227]

If only there was a do not recommend shorts button too.

[@imreallybadatnamingthings]

I use that "Don't Recommend Channel" a lot! I'm very glad KZbin has it

[@PurpleArcher102]

Except it doesn't even work anymore

[@conceptualizing]

youtube not allowing you to block a channel/account entirely is one of its biggest Flops

[@k8terdoesthings368]

Whenever I hear Jarvis introduce a video by calling me premium it’s an instant serotonin boost

[@ipromiseimtrying]

No cause it fr gets me so happy

[@umyeah3116]

it makes me miss the extra greeting from Kurtis Connor

[@Drownedquackrat]

same it helps so much with my depression it's the little things that help so much

[@trollbridge01]

You get serotonin! Man… I just get plain ol’ dopamine 😔

[@pastelsheepy]

literally same ❤

[@pinkpunther]

"My boss doesn't let me flirt with him. He's so controlling"

[@impartialphoenix261]

Jarvis casually roasting Jordan Adika is just so hilarious

[@definietlynotowl3607]

KZbin is getting exposed to short form fetish content in record time

[@Intheearly2000s]

Yeah

[@ellamalone1086]

I get literal porn ads and spam on it no matter how much I report and click do not recommend.

[@yoursleepparalysisdemon8216]

Snapchat too, the prank videos are either, ripping off your girlfriend's panties, showing your ass, or trying to throw mentos in coke to shoot up someone's genitals. The set ups were just about identical too.

[@thegreatcanadianlumberjack5307]

i mean they allow Suggestive content to be advertised and we all know Mobile game ads are a prime example on how lax KZbin is when it comes to there advertising policies.

[@wolvie1618]

​@@ellamalone1086 have you tried blocking them? You can block specific ads, but sadly not the entire advertiser, but it should give you a bit more peace.

[@viviantompkins7925]

1:15 The kiss on Danny's forehead was so wholesome, we love boyz supporting boyz

[@Lee-fx7bd]

Fr

[@maximusdudimus4241]

And yet the absolutely savage burn against Jordan Adika's fashion.

[@CatholicZola]

Boys 👏 support 👏 boys 👏

[@CatholicZola]

​@@maximusdudimus4241 he really went in on Jordan for no reason 😂

[@yugenalgiz]

How can she be the boss if he can fire her tho???? What kind of weird ass company is that smdh Edit: Also Jordan definitely didn't deserve to be attacked like that

[@Draqer]

That one felt so dumb and wierd i was starting to wonder if the joke was on the viewer somehow?

[@yuujibeloved01]

maybe the word controlling was a typo and the actual word they wanted to put was trolling

[@lolmariolink]

He called HR

[@thponders]

These are just the beginning of every porn video ever. Everyone is oblivious, the story is nothing. It just never gets to the porn part.

[@sineadbrennan-allen6045]

speaking of p0rn, some of the comments on the yt shorts have literal links to p0rn! *there's no beating around the bush here, it's literally two people getting intimate/having s3x with each other* and idk how youtube allows it *or maybe its because they didn't see it before/completely missed it* but it's weird nsfw words/f3tish content safe-words that link to that site, that is full of trojans/computer viruses, and p0rn! *tons and tons of p0rn* and what makes it worse is it's easily accessible for someone like me/a trans minor/someone who shouldn't have the access to p0rn *or at least by iowan law, and by the laws of the internet*

[@monicarenee7949]

First one especially felt like a p*rn intro

[@joearnold6881]

Oh man, that first video was just like that time I was arrested, tried, sentenced, and serving time all while wearing a big rubber mask. So glad they didn’t notice for all those years till I could fake an illness and be brought to the hospital where I took off my handcuffs they didn’t lock as well as the mask to escape. Nobody call the cops on me Kthx

[@zubetp]

too late, i already did. they're on their way. you've done it now, wastoid

[@Hip.Username]

We've all been there, but not all of us were clever enough to think of removing the mask to escape. Honestly that short taught me something for next time 😌

[@abitsourrrrsorry4885]

The only thing they got it right is that cops are just that bad at their job. This is truly the peak anti-copaganda stuff we have never seen.

[@Dhdjksjsnsnsnnsnsna]

Hello, police? Yes, this person right here.

[@joearnold6881]

@@Dhdjksjsnsnsnnsnsna noooooo Everyone I thought I knew was actually a police in rubber masks they’d been wearing since I met them and you ratted me out!!

[@maarekstele2998]

I remember when i first used KZbin shorts and i just got bombarded with horrible transphobic videos it sucked and i barely ever touched KZbin shorts since

[@viersamstagsfliege1594]

Beb Shabibo and Bordan Beterson :(

[@limitless_valley]

​@@viersamstagsfliege1594 bent sharpie and poordan litterson :c

[@benberg7475]

@@limitless_valley bent sharpie 😭

[@noodlynoodle]

that one man and his mom who's just a giant pick me 💀 can't remember the name but it was garbage. Worst part is, idek what I interact with to get shit like that but it's so tiring

[@rosecity_chris]

Yup I still get them constantly. The comments are usually unhinged too.

[@greybee]

"men will be men" is the wildest takeaway from that video

[@lawrencefosterjenkins8216]

i as a guy am also oblivious to my surroundings. like when i'm in a cave with my bandit friends and one of them gets shot in the head with an arrow. clearly it wasn't murder because i didn't see the arrow get drawn.

[@skellbo]

Hm, must've been the wind.

[@cabbage7643]

I truly hope that there’s a “disable shorts” button the future because KZbin is constantly shoving it down ours throats whenever we go on the platform

[@rjai5003]

So sad that all the people in the Paulvu universe are completely unable to see anything that’s not directly in front of them

[@alicine-sims8988]

Paulvu has no perphial vision and is trying to convince the rest of us that perphial vision does not exist.

[@jadennowlin5583]

Jarvis feels like he's in a fever dream in the first video while I feel like I'm witnessing terrible amateur adult videos lol.

[@RettMikhal]

Except the porn part never comes. Or arrives.

[@brezzlendean77]

Omg ur right

[@minigremlin1233]

This honestly does feel like someone typed into chat GPT: The year is 2014, you are a youtube content creator who specializes in prank videos. You are running short on your deadline. Write a script that can be replicated in 5 minutes at most.

[@rapdactyl]

I did some rewording of your prompt but uh, it did come up with..well, this: Title: Switching Names Prank Description: In this video, we'll be pranking our friends by switching their names around and seeing how they react! Script: 1. Start by introducing the prank and explaining that you'll be switching names around. 2. Gather a group of friends and have them sit in a circle or around a table. 3. Choose two friends to target and tell them that you're going to switch their names for the next five minutes. 4. Call each friend by the other's name and see how they react. You can say things like "Hey, Sarah, can you pass me the salt?" when you're talking to your friend John. 5. Encourage the other friends to play along by also calling the two friends by the wrong names. 6. After a few minutes, reveal the prank and watch everyone's reactions.

[@minigremlin1233]

Announce the prank while the targets are there is just right, A little to harmless to match these videos i think, but pretty much perfect haha

[@rapdactyl]

@@minigremlin1233 Chatgpt refused to do anything with prank unless I specified that it was to be a harmless prank

[@minigremlin1233]

@@rapdactyl So true honestly. After the clown incedents, probably smart

[@kuzcospoisonthepoisonforku2607]

dude I have to write an essay on chat gap- bout to use this as evidence 💀

[@pinkiepielunagirls4541]

my main beef with youtube shorts is the fact that a ton of old short videos like vine reuploads got turned into shorts??? it's really annoying

[@sillypplproductions2]

Yeah, the fact that it automatically reads any vertical video within the time allotment as a short is dumb 🙄

[@axolotl9861]

Yeah! I've even seen short songs get turned into youtube shorts and it's so annoying because I hate the format so much and literally can't watch or listen to old videos I used to like after they've become shorts

[@kemi0405]

KZbin adding yt shorts was the worst idea ever💀💀

[@laynedoe3455]

Tbh KZbin has done so much awful shit the last few years, that them adding the shorts doesn’t even register on the ‘bad moves’ list. It’s seriously not as awful as you seem to think it is, it’s really not that bad bro. It’s just…. Short videos, I seriously don’t see how ‘horrible’ that is.

[@crunchylettuce]

@@laynedoe3455 not to mention all the stuff they’ve done to the visuals of the site. they have pretty much all sucked.

[@sixletss]

​@@laynedoe3455 hey man relax! they mean that the content on shorts sucks. we didn't need another tiktok haha

[@Garsnoos]

@@laynedoe3455 Relax. The content of the KZbin shorts sucks ass. They get very transphobic very quickly. The shorts are just full of garbage people and comments and the algorithm does not work at all. That's why it's horrible. Like how do you not understand this?

[@R-rr1]

The apps are plagiarizing on each other

[@cookingwithsilence]

When you stare at some butt for so long that your elderly prisoner becomes a young nurse.... Been there.

[@PissyLissy]

Whelp, it's settled, and the KZbin gods have spoken. This weekend will be a Jarvis-binging weekend.

[@laynedoe3455]

Well shoot, I DID have work this weekend but you’re right- the gods have spoken.

[@khailaturner8043]

I like to do a Jarvis Dhar Mann binge every once in a while 😂

[@kindal5671]

​@@khailaturner8043 me too, along with moment of truth and fact or fiction

[@roxasleviathan9409]

Same, I somehow missed out on most of Sad Boyz and have been catching up over the past few days!

[@iniyama]

yeah...let's just say I'm really glad I downloaded that sketchy "yt shorts blocker" chrome extension with 10 reviews wish it worked on phones as well

[@whitewolf262]

KZbin Revanced

[@0x8badf00d]

Firefox on Android supports extensions.

[@Shuang_Shuang]

The most unrealistic thing about the birth prank was that she was "giving birth" 1 sec after her water broke 😂

[@alicine-sims8988]

Right? Even if you have a huge break so they induce further because of infection babies not gonna start coming out that fast.

[@Shuang_Shuang]

@@alicine-sims8988 exactly hahaha In only 1-in-5 cases does the water break before contractions happen, and even when it does, they don't worry about infections the first 13 hours

[@astronomical926]

Don't you know? The water breaking is the vagina opening which makes the baby fall out. /s

[@ryuugureen4969]

This is actually one of those facebook videos that last a looonnng time where nothing actually happens. But they actually cut it to the actual content for youtube shorts.

[@Gamingturtle090]

So can I find answers to these insane situations and further context?!?

[@Emu19]

​@@Gamingturtle090 Probably more along the lines of still not having answers, no extra context, and just heaps of silent/dead zones in the video, or parts where a character just says the same thing over and over to stretch the video out. When Ryuu Gureen says they "cut it to the actual content" they MEAN it LMAO. There is nothing else worth watching in those videos. I've literally seen videos that were like 10 minutes long and nobody said anything until the 9 minute mark. No joke. They were closer to NPC's that just stand around waiting for the player to enter the room than actual human beings. So please, for your sanity, don't even bother looking for the original video 😂😂

[@ashley-m]

KZbin Shorts are a plague on humanity. It’s all.. mindless edging content. Wild.

[@Tw0Dots]

Mindless what

[@lanceelliott2504]

@@Tw0Dots you heard them

[@howdoimakeachannel-wj3qc]

DID YOU KNOW THAT...

[@franklydoodle350]

I like the youtube shorts I get

[@alcidesprieto1967]

​@@franklydoodle350 Me too. The ones I watch least.

[@maledictionwolf]

Some maths regarding view counts on shorts: (tl;dr: 200M is actually more like 50M) Shorts on mobile loop, so unless you go to another video before the short ends, you automatically end up viewing it twice, since YT seems to count views from the instant a video starts. There's no timer bar at the bottom so you don't know when they end, and many are designed to loop seamlessly, so it's hard to tell when you've gone from the first view to the second. Then there's also that they continue playing while you read the comments as well as type up your own comment (which will add at least 1, but usually 2 or more additional views as shorts are max 60 seconds and I'm pretty sure most people spend more than 2 minutes reading and typing in the comments). So using this, we get that each individual viewer gives, at a minimum, between 2 and 4 views **just the first time they encounter the short.** So yeah, the views are stupidly high on these things. If you want a better estimate of how many **people** watched a short, rather than the number of times the first second of the short has been played, for a generous estimate divide by 2 and for a better estimate, divide it by 4. 200M views this way becomes a still insane but much more understandable 50M, which given the sheer number of comments on these shorts is definitely the better number (remember, we got to diving by 4 by assuming the short played twice while people read and typed comments)

[@EthanAlbaTheFaceGuy]

Looping videos don't count as new views, they count for higher watch time (>100%)

[@fahlmancomputing8628]

"All because he's dressing like Jordan Adika?" 😂😂😂

[@disembodied1273]

Maybe these are like one of those obscure fetishes that accidentally goes viral on the mainstream and people don't get it and the people who get it aren't saying anything lol

[@yoonglebellz]

I absolutely hate that on youtube mobile the "home"/start up section will jump to shorts. Often I open youtube on my phone to watch something specific, but because of a certain other short content app and my ADHD I get distracted and often keep scrolling mindlessly and feel like I've lost time when I catch myself doing it. Not to mention the content of youtube shorts in particular is so random, clearly it just throws whatever has/is getting views out with no regard for what people enjoy watching. My subscription box also gets so cluttered with all the shorts I straight up unsub from channels who post a lot of shorts when it's their long form content I'm interested in. The numbers of yt channels I've subbed to for their shorts is dead ass 0

[@cookiecatification]

SAME i am also ND its a fucking struggle

[@sillypplproductions2]

?? My app never jumps to shorts automatically first, what'd you do to yours to make it do that???

[@yoonglebellz]

@@sillypplproductions2 nothing lol, I haven't touched the settings at all.

[@clown1ng_ar0undd]

I love being premium. It brings joy to my heart. Thank you for bestowing this gift of premium-ness upon us for free. A truly amazing opportunity

[@jamul_cos]

Recovering from my wisdom teeth removal while being ✨premium✨

[@frogmanjones6340]

Not gonna lie, I died inside when I saw a short of a guy assembling a statue (like big statue) of the r*pe scene that happens in Berserk*. Shorts are the worst thing in this shitty site.

[@imaniwashington6341]

im just trying to clarify, is there a show called guts or are we talking about berserk?

[@frogmanjones6340]

@@imaniwashington6341 berserk. My bad. It was that scene with casca

[@fighttheevilrobots3417]

Oh no. My bf has huge discplates of characters in Berserk in his office. How concerned should I be?

[@frogmanjones6340]

@@fighttheevilrobots3417 that thing was custom made. No decent company would ever produce something so heinous. The person in question paid someone to produce that abhorrent shit. If your bf is fine, no one with a minimum of social skills would ever buy something like that, let alone display in an office.

[@ringer1324]

@@fighttheevilrobots3417 bezerk itself isn’t bad! Just that one statue that guy made. Don’t worry at all. Many people are fans of Bezerk and have merch it’s a classic. Discplate would never make a product based on that scene

[@princegorha]

It boggles my mind that there are 200,000,000 people in the world who would willingly watch ANY KZbin short, let alone this one

[@SuzER08]

Shorts automatically loop after you watch them, so I highly doubt 200M people have watched these, a lot of kids watch shorts so it's more likely that the views are so high because kids are letting them loop and giving them a lot more views

[@RizzyRamone67]

Dude, you would be surprised how many people talk about me like they think my blindness somehow make me deaf….

[@__m-a-x__]

These KZbin shorts make me feel new flavors of cringe. I’m really exploring myself here. Thanks Jarvis. I’m feeling as premium as ever.

[@ja1rlyn]

got a shorts ad today about a woman who’s 58 year old boyfriend had erectile dysfunction

[@zolizard]

peak content

[@kanaryskabana]

there was one where this guy was in a wheelchair and he was getting married and the wife ran from and he was like, “I’ll walk for you babe” and he fell out of his wheelchair and crawled 😭😭😭

[@aj1533]

😭😭😭 JAIL!!!

[@MantaRaySunray]

I fear the day when Jarvis Johnson Gold is no longer free

[@rosecity_chris]

I've seen creators like big tugg absolutely sky rocket in subs because of shorts. Which is weird because the algorithm sucks and constantly tries to feed me conservative hate videos

[@pansexualdickhaver6878]

Bruh same. Get those conservatives off my feed😂

[@yourgayness]

Big tugg is good at least !!

[@medijate]

i would genuinely bet money on 90% if not 100% of these shorts being done in one take in exchange for 2 dollars and some pocket change

[@finnilyenough]

it's crazy that anyone could be rich if they just have no self respect

[@Laura-dl6vv]

I'm fascinated by this type of content because it often seems sincere?? It feels like it was made by & for people who like spend their time watching highlight clips from The Office but have never seen the show so they don't know that escalation, buildup and context are vital for comedy.

[@brianataylorYASitsBriBriLolz]

@HappyThife well that certainly gave my inner monologue something to ponder, cause WHAT?… 😭😭🤯 So their minds are just literally empty? They don’t think??

[@dojasponytail217]

I honestly think it has to be fetish videos? Like this is too weird for it to not be

[@cookiecatification]

its not sincere its souless and just for money i respect your opinion though

[@unknowncarp]

​@Briana Taylor they do think, they just don't think with words

[@thecreatorofpc7929]

@HappyThife Would it still be called an “inner monologue” if the voice isn’t mine? It’s not like “The voices in my head are telling me to do something illegal” or anything like that. It’s an inner monologue but sometimes the voice changes, like i was binge watching a lets-play channel and my inner monologue basically took their voice. It hasn’t happened again (or stuck with that voice), even with me still watching the channel. It feels weird to think about. I’m guessing it may have something to do with me not talking at all outside of conversation. Like i somehow don’t know what i sound like.

[@redfrog1628]

I know exactly what these are, Facebook has this EXACT short video formula. I can't tell if it's supposed to be for kids or adults honestly.

[@MinecrafterAl]

I swear I saw a video with that exact prisoner in mask and distracted cop setup on one of those Facebook videos literal years ago.

[@SheepUndefined]

@@MinecrafterAl I think in Danny's video he mentioned that these actually are reuploaded fb videos. Or at least, if he didn't, his comments all were saying that.

[@hellboy30098]

I call it Timer Bait. Facebook Pages do it all the time, it'll be a dumb headline and then will STALL for 10-15 mins STRAIGHT then wrap up in 5 seconds

[@PixieNSurf]

I was laughing so hard when Jarvis asked why he shimmied into the frame. 😂

[@jade-qi8ot]

I had a therapist named Paul Vu who told me to try going to a Sprinkles cupcake vending machine when I was severely depressed so you can imagine my fear when I heard his name mentioned

[@thatsthespirit3523]

The way i deleted TikTok to escape wasting my Lifetime with content that grabs attention, more often than not is made so it makes me unhappy, uncomfortable or angry and wants to manipulate me into interacting for views and now every single app has it built in. And i know "just don't watch then" is the favorite answer to the criticism, and I'm working on it. Additionally in case people are addicted to their phones and that type of content, and still want to experience things that they enjoy like certain creators, there'll always be a pull towards those, especially since there is no option to turn it off! At least Instagram has a decent algorithm, but KZbin shorts is hell. From the unregulated hate speech, to children showing their faces to an audience of size they can't even grasp. Also, views used to be worth something, because people chose to click, to me it seems like scrolling through shorts or reels or whatever is more like being subjected to content and counted as a viewer instead of choosing

[@annaingolfs]

I think people just watch the shorts a few times because they are SO weird that you think “oh I must’ve missed something” x3

[@SheepUndefined]

Partially that, but also bc yt counts everyone who scrolls by the video long enough for it to start autoplaying as a watch.

[@gr33ngirlsea]

That "Controlling Boss" one is horrible. She's completely sexually harassing him and should have been fired. It's definitely not something to laugh at, ridiculous cuts aside.

[@notevennero]

idk about everyone else but in my personal experience ..no matter how many times i block channels ..click dont recommend or dislike certain content it still shows up in my shorts feed. also all them shorts lowkey make it seem like Mr Paul is producing softcore something 💀

[@panickedshears]

I consume KZbin shorts for one reason and one reason only: art/makeup videos from creators I enjoy. Outside of that, it’s a literal hell hole

[@michellebeaulieu8118]

I spend some time every now and then on KZbin Shorts but I don't really remember getting anything weird, I mostly just see stuff from the same creators that I've liked before.

[@franklydoodle350]

Same

[@smoothbrain8519]

These kinds of shorts are peak internet dumpster fire, its an attempt to appeal to any and all viral content for the resources that comes with engagement, attention, revenue. The internet, at the end of its entropy cycle, inevitably, will be spam. And here is what the spam looks like at the moment :’| Thanks Jarvis for the Gold content, you are an example of what constructive intentional forces on the internet can be like :’)

[@BackBurnerNiDiluc]

14:00 - "Is it because he's dressed as Jordan Adika." WAS SO OUT OF NOWHERE 😭

[@carrot4126]

I wish social media would leave the short-form content on tiktok. It sucks that everywhere you go now you always get sucked into watching tons of short videos. Especially having ADHD, struggling with time blindness- its hard to get away from it and then also not get trapped into watching hundreds of videos over the course of several hours without realizing how long it’s been. I’m also just generally worried for my attention span and the attention spans of other people. It sucks that some people are unable to watch a movie or even have a conversation with someone without going on their phone- and I try hard not to be one of those people by keeping my phone in the other room, or just generally away from me. But short-form content is definitely addictive, and inevitable that companies will exploit that. Don’t get me wrong, there are tons of short form videos that I think are really thought out and funny, but then you get people like Vu, who’s just making shitty fetishized bits based on over-dramatics or crude and honestly offensive “comedy”. It’s just not something you want to see.

[@victorialam9044]

Every time I watch a Premium video, I yell gold at the same time as the sound effect, it has become a habit, a ritual even, to start this premium content knowing that I’m GOOOOOOOOLD

[@florafoxen]

bro i literally had to report a bunch of gore/dead animal videos while trying not to look at them it was horrific

[@kirstenmanning7435]

Whenever I hear that goooooold in the background, it just makes me smile

[@kadelloyd5671]

7:30 "Which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice"

[@gcheftjgfba2655]

Fact:they always send swat to babysit inmates in the hospital.😂

[@hammerbeam]

More people would probably subscribe if you brought the price down on this premium content

[@mileysreputation5608]

“Please, Jenna can’t hear us, she’s blind.”

[@msjkramey]

I used to have that couch from IKEA! It's pretty cool. It's a storage couch and sofa bed. You store the blankets and sheets during the day and all the back pillows at night

[@GlobalistHero]

When is "Jarvis Johnson PLATINUM" coming out, I no longer feel special.

[@author_abe]

I watched Austin Powers for the first time not too long ago, and when I heard the "gooooold" line, I immediately said "OMG that's where Jarvis' intro is from"

[@skellbo]

Honestly, the goooooold sample is what made me actually watch Jarvis when I first watched one of his videos lol. Love Austin Powers

[@MarqueExists]

I truly cannot wait until the day that Jarvis Johnson! GOLD gets a golden play button and then reaches his final form

[@Antony_Oscar]

The premise of some of these videos, with the disguises especially, remind me of stuff I would've come up with as a kid during play time, when spies and disguises were a big thing.

[@dipbert]

The best part of the Jarvis Johnson! GOLD channel is the voice in the beginning yelling "GOLDDDDDD!"

[@shrimpy5296]

i finally bended the youtube shorts algorithm which is weirdly separate from the regular youtube algorithm and now my shorts are bearable

[@paladinosaur_]

Always a relief to hear that the premium channels is still free!! Sometimes I worry about inflation and everything…

[@sadie1606]

I will literally watch all my favorite KZbinrs talk about the same subject all day. Everyone has unique jokes and I love for it

[@swingsets1102]

Just got home from work. I'm stoned, I got some green tea, I got some peanutbutter cookies and I got a new Jarvis video. sublime.

[@TheQueenOfSheba]

luck of the Irish today with GOLD!

[@Almost_Awesome]

The absolute TikTok-ification of every app blows my mind

[@Artsensei86]

the amount of time I put in to my shorts and this guy gets this kind of growth is kind of nausea inducing

[@minanam3735]

That Jordan attack was so uncalled for xdd

[@MisterSynyster]

This feels like ads from a video game that doesn't play anything like it looks. They show you Blind Girl Honeypot Confusion & then it's just Puyo Pop

[@lunacy3]

The jab at Jordan was too good lmao

[@thicc_astley]

wasn’t expecting a random jordan roast 💀

[@m4tt.mp4]

i have no idea how to explain this but youtube shorts reminds me of blockbuster

[@astrowolvez]

I hate youtube shorts so much, and it’s annoying how they’re so easy to accidentally press but to delete them from your history is an annoying process (compared to just a normal video).

[@kiralidia9470]

Vu's shorts are basically equivalent to the weird game ads that Danny likes to talk about. 😂😂😂😂

[@kitty0chan444]

Me when a KZbinr I like uploads a video as I’m eating so I don’t have to scavenge for ages

[@skye4082]

Yeah FR, it’s awesome

[@gabbym360]

Jordan did NOT deserve that roast omg

[@KingOfGaymes]

That “Gooooold” is always amazing

[@FlintKnap]

the fake blind girl sent me on a 10 mnute irl rant to my dad about disrespect because my mother used to use one of those canes (legally blind) after joking about taking her swimming im back to finish this vid 💪 i can totally do this without another rage spike

[@yeaitzamhere]

A Friday upload from Jarvis is exactly what I needed!

[@tubbymontana7090]

I never knew how much I wanted a Jarvis Johnson Gold gold plaque to be a thing until now this must become reality

[@Dewd1e]

“There is so much happening right now and I don’t understand it” pretty much sums up KZbin shorts

[@camzilla603boy12]

I'm so glad you are helping out a smaller KZbinr named I think Daniel goggles

[@olivejuice1424]

You "don't wanna eat anyone else's lunch" is so cute

[@chl03k__]

Tbh watching Jarvis is the highlight of my day. It’s so nice to come home after a long shift and lay in bed and watch a video or two. Thank u

[@m.stamatin]

Literally me rn

[@Furysonofrage]

Every time Jarvis calls me premium i call my mom to tell her she has a premium boy.

[@Alex-cw3rz]

This proves we don't live in a meritocracy or even close

[@ImmaterialDream]

Its working because: It is short and ridiculous , so easy to make and people want to write some wacky comments on it. -> More engagement on the video more youtube algorithm recommends it to other people. -> More people watch it even more comments. -> Easy to make because short so even more recommendations -> Success