Trump Labels The Trade War A 'Little Squabble'

Today's Donald Trump vocabulary word of the day: squabble.
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The Late Show with Stephen Colbert is the premier late night talk show on CBS, airing at 11:35pm EST, streaming online via CBS All Access, and delivered to the International Space Station on a USB drive taped to a weather balloon. Every night, viewers can expect: Comedy, humor, funny moments, witty interviews, celebrities, famous people, movie stars, bits, humorous celebrities doing bits, funny celebs, big group photos of every star from Hollywood, even the reclusive ones, plus also jokes.

[@iketheranter9126]

I guarentee his Impeachment will be the highest rated, most loved , show of All Time!! I'd even pay to view it. Ya Bastard.

[@mmcken3354]

fantastic statement -- thanks

[@muadhib001]

80$ PPV must see!!

[@IAmSuzyQ]

Trillions (or billions, whichever🤦🏼‍♀️) of people glued to their TVs!

[@Xcris_crosX]

Worldwide celebration and dancing in the streets. A new holiday added to the calendar. Arbor Day, Groundhog Day, Leap Day... Impeachment Day!!!

[@wallywang5072]

That day would become a national holiday 😂

[@rockysamsi3449]

Correct me if I am wrong since I am not an American, but I distinctly remember seeing in TV that it was cloudy and drizzling during Trump's inauguration, it's as if a million voices whimpered and shed a tear before being memed forever.

[@mmcken3354]

priceless statement- we are still shedding tears & crying because he is still in our beautiful White House stinking it up.

[@g0679]

Rocky Samsi It wasn’t well attended, either. And not much entertainment that evening. Best Wishes from Hogtown, Florida.

[@franciet99]

You are correct, sir!

[@williamfroh8830]

Not defending Trump but the day he is talking about the the November election. Your talking about the January innoraration. Two of the top 5 worst days in America

[@virgo-in-cyn1537]

Rocky Samsi I agree ☝🏻

[@Daraka.]

Remember that beautiful day in November 2016 (No reaction from audience) That’s one of the highest rated days in the history of television (Queue applause) One of the highest (More applause) One of the highest... Classic Trump. He repeats himself until everyone acknowledges him, regardless of how untrue what he’s saying is.

[@Weegee766]

Darakaa I hope that crowd got paid to be there to pretend to care

[@zeusmasterson4117]

Darakaa Much like a two-year-old.

[@almagirimai8931]

Kind of indicates how unconscious and basically malleable his bought audience is, even if they're a bit slow to start... they eventually catch on to what he's requiring. What a sham!

[@thingsretiredpeopledo3060]

And then there was the Squabble of 1812... the Bay of Squabbles... the Korean Squabble... Vietnam Squabble... Damn! That's a lot of Squabbles!

[@JoelEmberson]

Don't forget the squabble on drugs!

[@MrLifecereal]

this has to be my favourite trump quote so far "I think its fake news, okay. Now, would I do that? Absolutely."

[@randomnamegbji]

Agreed! That's comedy gold.

[@couragekarnga8735]

Real news, fake president.

[@nickmangaroo]

😂😂😂

[@dday9433]

Funny in a rage filled terrifying way.

[@ajthegoat75]

😜😜😜😜😜😜🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬

[@kathcasey2090]

I love how the band played, "If I only had a brain", at 5:50! Brilliant

[@cinne2135]

Was wondering if anyone caught that - Batiste is the man! 🎶

[@redisthecoolestcolour]

Jon Batiste is the man.

[@couragekarnga8735]

Gods bless John. We underestimate him.

[@iltulipano]

and at 2:33 he plays Ornithology by Charlie Parker (Bird)!!

[@Anna-914]

Kath Casey LMFAO😂 brilliant

[@elizahhoward3923]

I just have to say, how Stephen reads trumps tweets is gold😂😂😂

[@joshuaguzman-rolon2919]

John is under appreciated. 😂♥️ them beats 🔥

[@TheGuniverse2k]

He's my favorite aspect of the show lol 💯☑

[@suefila6699]

People around the World watched television on November 2016........and wept for the future of our planet!

[@noypho91]

Sue Fila true. It was my oldest’s 1st bday. We’re out for dinner and the results came in during dessert and I cried.

[@sjs9698]

did they? what was it about? did he pretend he'd do something for the us coal sector? i heard he fucked them, so that'd ring true...

[@ryanrentschler1544]

Said only NYC and LA

[@JonBerry555]

One of my teachers had a breakdown and couldn't focus the next day to teach, do we ended up giving her words of encouragement.

[@kinngrimm]

120k cupcakes could solve all our problems, need help for deployment?

[@martchelomantchev7534]

Just when you think republicans can't possibly come up with any one dumber than bush......surprize,trump makes bush look like a genius and a Angel

[@dentuborg1]

VERY! VERY! TRUE!

[@cameleyez]

@michael smalley only morons who think Obama was a bad President is the idiots who think Trump is a good one. No one laughed at Obama, he's respected and admired. Trump is laughed at and despised. Now go crawl back Trumps ass where u belong.

[@sdfkjgh]

7:26 Anyone else notice that "great Patriot Farmers" sounds more like terminology used in places like USSR, China, & North Korea?

[@aeroripper]

Yea well its Trump so that's to be expected.

[@artembentsionov]

Soon they will move on to “glorious workers and farmers”

[@Gattobuono]

@Dak Lamerbusch He's already a dick, just needs to perfect the tator bit .....

[@tommyt1971]

Pretty soon he’ll start replacing that with “comrades”.

[@cocopecan]

A lot of the farmers still support don the con so hey they must like what he's doing. Plus the farmers are receive welfare during this tariff war so I guess it's working out for them.

[@awashington8447]

Trump: "I think that's fake news!! Now, would I do that?! *Absolutely* " 🤦🏻‍♂️🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤦🏻‍♂️🤣🤣🤣

[@bilateralrope8643]

Sounds like him planning is fake news.

[@DebbieDenkeMusic]

2:33 Stephen talks about KFC 'bird cemetary', and Jon Batiste plays Charlie Parker's tune, "Ornithology" on the piano. Parker's nickname was "Bird"

[@DebbieDenkeMusic]

5:50 Jon quotes, "If I Only Had a Brain"

[@kopfnicker5346]

Thank you! Was looking for a comment about ornithology! :)

[@rickgraham786]

@@kopfnicker5346 So was I!🎷

[@a.j.9727]

Here's to my first love: jazz. 🍹🎷

[@duanepoettcker5544]

Nice catch. I had to check the comments to see if anyone else noticed before I posted.

[@Locsmth]

That grown man (emphasis on the word grown) wearing those socks, is very symbolic of the current state of the GOP.

[@110100111000]

But is it intentionally symbolic?

[@3dfreak2000]

Just don't ask him to show his other underwear. It will bring you nightmares. :P

[@couragekarnga8735]

Ah, the GOP. The seat of corruption.

[@patafanmarti2913]

I honestly don't care for one. We shouldn't care what people wear, no matter what side they are on. I think the socks are funny

[@elenachristian9860]

Im just amazed they werent knee pads.

[@didderjade]

The Scarecrow's "If I only had a brain" from Jon Batiste. Fantastic.

[@aridelight]

We want a full version of "Trade war" by John Batiste!! 👍👍👍

[@MrAlito27]

(1:05-1:20) 2016 was one of the most painful days for all of us.

[@arnoldsherrill6305]

It was the equivalent of giving this country a lobotomy with no anesthesia

[@RIXRADvidz]

there comes a day for you to save yourself and Kick Trump in the Balls. Election Day 2020, Elect a Woman President for the USA and while You're At It, Get the Grandpas OUT of the Government.

[@mmcken3354]

his ratings where not as high as Obama's. funny no one argues anymore - they just go silent.

[@g0679]

RIXRADvidz Even Sen. Grassley of Iowa? McConnell of Kentucky? Who can replace them when it comes to screwing the nation??

[@pauljohnston9446]

@@arnoldsherrill6305 it was more like getting a colonoscopy with no anesthesia ...

[@notsure1969]

I still remember that day in November 2016. It still gives me nightmares.

[@lolalee7479]

I couldn't sleep well for days!

[@stopstalkingmegoogl]

I'm Canadian and I cried that night for all the people he would screw over in your country. Hoping for a miracle for you guys.

[@aeroripper]

I didn't vote for him but I had a feeling it was likely he would win. Almost unlimited media coverage of his policies, the weakness of Hillary's messaging and campaign against him, and a good portion of the electorate wanting a change candidate. Additionally that famous statistician (who successfully called the winners of numerous past candidates) predicted Trump would win simply due to media exposure and getting his messaging out so successfully.

[@sharonmullins1957]

I wake up screaming.....

[@sharonmullins1957]

@@stopstalkingmegoogl Thank you. We are just hoping for an election that wasn't rigged.

[@cytherians]

No wonder why Colbert has so much spring in his step. Trump is writing all of his material for free. Well, "free"... if you count stress for the entire nation as a donation.

[@MeredithAnne88]

Thank you, Stephen and Jon! You're helping to make this season of life more bearable.

[@cpallas4411]

"Does anyone remember that lovely day in November?" *I wish I didn't*

[@plaidpanda]

The vodka helps me forget.

[@JVenger]

Thanksgiving?

[@salilbhatnagar]

You and me both

[@cpallas4411]

@@JVenger LOL I wish

[@chuckmcveigh1896]

9/11 and 11/9 two days that lead to destruction of America.

[@m.rodrigolemus6224]

Who knew Obamacare, Trade Wars and Umbrellas were so Complicated? 😉

[@phyllishahart6111]

M. Rodrigo Lemus we did ❤️

[@g0679]

M. Rodrigo Lemus Or toilet tissue.

[@tqln.7088]

Do not forget the taxes that are too complicated even for the entire US Congress.

[@g0679]

MAZNs PAPPY Too complicated for the WH Press Secretary. And like Our President, she is fond of projection.

[@Neojhun]

Umbrella and Planes though, quite the challenging puzzle.

[@richsackett3423]

"If I Only Had A Brain" and the Bird tune quote. Jon is on fire!

[@mori1bund]

8:40 a politician misusing the troops to get out of a question is one of the most Republican things I've ever seen. ^^

[@CloudsGirl7]

If only Drumpf's little rallies represented America and not ignorance - then he would hear the boos and hisses, and be pelted with all sorts of food and garbage. But he needs his loyal little lemmings, his cultists, to further inflate his ego. Those who were once cultists and have now deflected, I welcome you back to reality, but can't thank you for the severe disservice you've already done to humanity.

[@tonib.3016]

Stephen,you make living thru this Dumpsterfire a little more Colbert-able...

[@A_A_K_123]

well put

[@suzesiviter6083]

I bet you are a joy at parties.

[@tonib.3016]

@@suzesiviter6083 depends on my mood haha!

[@jay.hartman1789]

"Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee... are so screwed." XD Accurate.

[@thomasdequincey5811]

K.F.C, the worlds largest bird cemetery. Genius

[@virakchhang]

5:50 - Low-key shade by pianist playing, "...If I only had a brain."

[@dienomo]

You are not clever

[@virakchhang]

I'm not but the musician is. Have a great day

[@rosenbaum75]

Colbert destroying Trump on a daily basis. I love it.

[@RIXRADvidz]

you don't have to write this stuff, Trump does all the hard work, all Stephen and Crew need to do is compile for maximum laugh gets.

[@telectronix1368]

'destroying' implies that there was ever anything of substance.

[@vietnamd0820]

RIXRADvidz So true! Proof, “I think it’s fake news...now would I do that, absolutely”...what a clown

[@samshepherd1100]

Go trump!

[@rosenbaum75]

@American Made whose a Democrat? I'm not a fucking Democrat. Trump's an idiot. I don't know how anyone can stand him. He's an incompetent, incoherent, rampantly narcissistic liar. He's a crusty orange testicle and I cannot stand him. He is the type of traitorous imbecile that even the staunchest of patriots should be demanding his removal from office. He's embarrassing. Lol anyone who can listen to him ramble incoherently and still think he should be president should have their voting rights revoked. You're even worse than Trump.

[@frankparent463]

No one: Trump: "You wanna see a bird cemetary?"

[@Weegee766]

Frank Parent no thank you. My cats bring them in from time to time 🤢🐱

[@ifartmagic]

5:50 "If i only had a brain" bahahahaha love the subtle notes they put into this show ✌😂

[@brianmessemer2973]

Yes! I was looking for this comment, thank you for making it!

[@ifartmagic]

@@brianmessemer2973 lol welcome 😂

[@williamfroh8830]

Make America Great Again Impeach Trump

[@williamfroh8830]

@@coleporath5968 what ???? It does affect me. The country he has betrayed is my country.

[@miskatonicalumni5612]

I prefer 'Make America Great, Impeach Trump" = MAGIT

[@herb369nichols]

Trump "thinks" that the day he was elected had the "highest ratings in television history". I can hardly wait until his impeachment hearings numbers are revealed! His television audience after the election was called was undoubtedly limited to his supporters and people that voted for him, but the "hearings" will indeed be a worldwide audience!!

[@herb369nichols]

That's a good one CIA! I LIKE it! 😂😂😂😂😂👍

[@notsure1969]

#MAGAIT

[@melissaweyrick5311]

Very sure it is Lindsey has the Trump Tramp Stamp.

[@g0679]

melissa weyrick On the underside of his upper lip? Like a racehorse?

[@seanderoo37]

Maybe both? Maybe it's a secret Club.

[@WindFireAllThatKindOfThing]

McConnell has one hidden in the waddles of his chins

[@christinevr7698]

EN3RGY I agree. Pretty sure it was a buy one get one free deal.

[@flankspeed]

A $15bn subsidy for farmers? So, socialism then.

[@JonBerry555]

Farmers have been given subsidies since the Great Depression and FDR's New Deal. The idea is that they will not be ruined by downturns in the economy or a bad harvest so that they can still be able to produce crops for the country. I would say it's more of a combination of the economic policies of socialism and capitalism with the mindset of mercantilism.

[@GorinRedspear]

You want to know something even sweeter? A lot of Americans line up to do volunteer work for the poor, sick, ... You know what they call doing something for the community out of your own will? Communism, the real communism that is, not the screwed up version Stalin and friends used.

[@ohmyblindman]

@@GorinRedspear prepare yourself for the same whacked out logic as shown @ 8:45 in the coming comments. People see the word Communism and lose their shit. You, sir, are brave and correct. We haven't heard about the common good since LBJ.

[@SpectatorAlius]

@@GorinRedspear Volunteer work helping the poor and sick is not Communism, it is being humane. No one should shirk this humanitarian duty for ideological reasons.

[@SpectatorAlius]

@@ohmyblindman Did you really not hear "about the common good" when President Nixon set up the EPA?

[@patrickmulvany2949]

I’m terrified and the audience laughs as Nero plays his fiddle.

[@williamcasey1927]

Starblazer laughter and tears are roommates with the same toothbrush. BTW, ew. ew. ew.

[@globalwarmhugs7741]

The "if I only had a brain" ref didn't go unnoticed monsieur Batiste. Love your take on things.

[@smiab1]

you could replace that with heart or courage cause 45 has neither.

[@brendanivey7814]

Ange Waters also threw in giant steps by coltrane and ornithology by charlie parker Jons a beast

[@globalwarmhugs7741]

@@brendanivey7814 totally throws down EVERY TIME. He should be illegal, or in The Roots, or my too-young boyfriend.

[@globalwarmhugs7741]

@@smiab1 agreed, friend. He has the ear of all of his hero despots, and zero respect, worldwide. Unfortunately, said despots have the money and the power. What fascinates me is that such unlikable people have such pathetic, obedient, sad, pale, smarmy, worthless people obeying their every word. It's mysterious, isn't it?

[@jpope125]

I love the way Colbert interacts with his audience & band during the monologue

[@Wh0isTh3D0ct0r]

"When the time is right, we will make a deal with China." Translation: As soon as my associates and I are done buying stocks at their low prices, I'll make a deal with China.

[@chrisbuttonshaw2088]

surprisingly categories that Trump products are in aren't affected.

[@maddpeanut6313]

stocks, low prices? what planet are you on?

[@Wh0isTh3D0ct0r]

Earth. The one with the stock market that took a plunge the day that this happened. Heard of it?

[@dienomo]

you don't know what you are talking about but you are as funny as Colbert

[@tahrondavis8080]

@@Wh0isTh3D0ct0r your correct!! The DOW is dropping!!

[@Laggie74]

Sanity left the building when Trump moved in.

[@223Drone]

I don't think the farmers' see Trump's trade war as a "Little Squabble" since their livelihoods are being ruined.

[@c.b.5535]

China is targeting farmers. I hope they feel it.

[@drfreud65]

Not to mention that Trump's tweets are very socialist - taking money from tariffs to pay farmers. If you actually listen to farmers, they want to make their own money. At least those who haven't already lost their farms due to the tariffs.

[@sharonmullins1957]

They all voted for him. Little sympathy here. Every 'farm state' voted repub.

[@drfreud65]

@@sharonmullins1957 Don't think they're not waking up. I live in a farming state.

[@lazychords7900]

Eeyup it is hurting farmers and seed distributors like pioneer DuPont. So some warehouse employees who for for them are going to feel the strain.

[@lynnc5252]

This 'presidency' is like being forced to watch a snuff film.

[@michaelpondo6324]

Yes and we re getting snuffed by a goddamned fool dressrd as an orange clown. Vote for anything but a republican. Now.

[@victorhawkins3461]

Jon -- "Ornithology"...simply beautiful! AND "If I Only Had a Brain"...you rawk!

[@holdencaustic]

Not many get his quotes.... I love it!

[@Scorch428]

2:46 - Damn, John can really sing. Is that live?

[@wizardsuth]

The shows are recorded before a live audience several hours before being broadcast.

[@ashtonstone5908]

If you’re asking if he pre-recorded the segment title, then no.

[@lexas1]

So exhausted from being flabbergasted by the incompetence of this administration.

[@stevejette2329]

trump may be an idiot and those around him power hungry, money hungry and evil …… but look what they have been able to accomplish. So much destruction !! And the Dems think we should still play nice !!

[@verilyheld]

Yes, usually the incompetent manage to do something right by accident. This administration couldn't make mud out of water and dirt.

[@sharksrppl2413]

It's the naked greed and bigotry of republican elected politicians/voters (the people who make Trump possible) that still has me floored.

[@diptarkadas5193]

incompetence?? They are extremely competent. Just their direction is wrong.

[@MrSiegenfeldt]

Flabbergasted is one of the Best english words

[@glennkonklin2926]

6:42 priceless. It shows his total lack of concern for people.

[@g0679]

Glenn Konklin He’s as malignant as a sack of trash can be.

[@markt9300]

He doesn't care . Why would he?

[@chloekey8043]

Are ivanka’s products exempt?

[@Volvican]

Shocking statement. It's like a 5 year old's understanding of trade - as if there haven't been years and decades of American industry doing what all the world does at this point - using the most economical resources to manufacture their product. American car companies using Chinese steel are just meant to switch overnight to America steel? As if that wouldn't and isn't affecting that industry? And as if this man knows anything about business. He lives on borrowed money. And then all the MASSIVE subsidies to the farming industry? Right - tell me again how socialism is the BIG BOOGIEMAN of Republicans. I just cannot believe how far the Republican Party has fallen. It's simply shocking.

[@sdfkjgh]

g069: Hey, hey, hey. I will not have you libeling sacks of trash. I've known plenty of trashsacks that are compassionate and caring for their fellow inhabitants of planet Earth.

[@kellykerr5225]

I know many people who went to bed crying in November 2016. Not a happy memory.

[@chattycathy8089]

Me too, I was one of them!! God help US!!!

[@plasticspoon60]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Funiest day of my life. Youre tears are so cringy and sweet.

[@bikingal4283]

I was in shock but now that we've seen how Russia interfered it makes sense and makes me furious. ..damn traitor in chief

[@kellykerr5225]

plastic Spoon I didn’t cry. Saying something is both cringy and sweet just isn’t a thing. Go away your comments don’t even make sense.

[@bernadettecavadi9706]

I'm still crying.

[@smartgirl909]

Letting Jon do a short song for the trade war segment ties him into the show so much better! They should always do this.

[@IHScoutII]

Holy cow! Over 10 minute clip, thank you.

[@phyllishahart6111]

International Harvester 🙌🏾

[@redisthecoolestcolour]

Gotta love when the new intern doesn't know how to edit the clip and just uploads the whole thing. (Not knocking it, LOVE these longer clips)

[@couragekarnga8735]

Merry Christmas!

[@chloekey8043]

My clip got cut up with an ad in the middle

[@redisthecoolestcolour]

@@chloekey8043 F

[@paulramos4037]

"Master Negotiator"...NOPE. Con Artist...Yep!

[@chuckmcveigh1896]

Master-bator... With the small pickle.

[@g0679]

Paul Ramos The Art of the Deal. My Ass.

[@g0679]

chuck mcveigh No-stem mushroom.

[@nnewland]

Gypsum lol

[@ishaschdv1]

g0679 i am really thinking whose work did he steal to write that book.

[@TheRogueWolf]

Now, now. Trump's supporters prefer the term "The Squabble of Northern Aggression".

[@christiankneupper7011]

I perfer the term squabble for southern independence.

[@1365potatoes]

I loved the ornithology quote from Jon Batiste. Clever dude.

[@shampoovta]

when the wind blew trump looked like he had doll hair. :/ creepy troll doll hair.

[@Poemi10304]

He sure does.

[@Poemi10304]

Kevin Prima I think even the inmates will be creeped out by him.

[@saintmichael1779]

A friend of mine went to Cape May the summer of 2017 and brought back a Trump troll doll. It was so freakin' funny.

[@frankwang5690]

Didn't want pay more to buy better one which made in USA🤭

[@Poemi10304]

Saint Michael I just had to google that! There’s a realistic-looking one that talks! Expensive though. Not worth it, because that jerk irritates me more than he amuses me.

[@seriesjunkie0074]

*Here's a hilarious joke...* 😁😁 A tax dodger, a mob boss and a rapist go into a restaurant. The waiter comes and asks: "What can I get you, President Trump?" 😀😁😂🤣😃😄😆😊☺🙂😏

[@bahaar2825]

Good one🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@alwaysbored6560]

Too much credit for mob boss, he would actually need to be tough and a bit smart, neither qualities he possesses.

[@DeterminedDIYer]

@@alwaysbored6560 change it to bully

[@pizzas4breakfast]

Donny "two brain cells" trump

[@markdowse3572]

YOWZA !!!!

[@michaelg3088]

He responded with, Yeah So..? Nice cavalier attitude about smalls businesses losing out.

[@trisailer1]

thank you Stephen, I don't know what I would do without you.

[@MeganKoumori]

No, a squabble is what happens when Eric and Don Jr. both want the prize in the Cap’n Crunch Box. What you’re doing is tanking the economy.

[@mosquitobight]

Must have been more of a tiff then.

[@veecee3669]

MeganKoumori Good one!

[@smallfishproduction3163]

ROFL!!!;-DDD (the Eric And Don detail)

[@TruckTaxiMoveIt]

If I our economia can tank because of any single supplier then we clearly have too much invested in that supplier -- diversification is the answer Walmart and the Dollar Tree has to find other suppliers in other countries. 50% of the stuff we get from China is junk. junk that we can get from other countries the other 50% is stuff that we can get in our country at a substantially higher price Our economy cannot tank as a result of buying from ourselves the worst case scenario is that our economy slows -- that slowing will only result in a stronger country with more options. The USA does not need China plain and simple. As for negotiations China can easily go without our contracts for a very long time because they certainly don't mind subsidizing the industry they've been doing it for quite some time nevertheless we should not be so close to any other country in the way that were close to China it's very very dangerous Canada is also one of our top trading partners we get a tons of do you get tons of things from them however they're not our enemy

[@brianandrews7491]

Hows he tanking the economy?? With record low unemployment and the highest gdp in history?? Yea sounds awful do u have any idea how hard china has been fucking the us with its trade tarriffs for decades??

[@ElmerFuddGun]

Trump has never had an understanding of scale and sizes. Just ask Stormy Daniels.

[@alejandrooonec6849]

ElmerFuddGun presidential intercourse

[@donaldpetkus1637]

Doesn’t understand economics, government, or a host of other things.

[@colinnoble3918]

he has a huge mushroom, it takes both his hands to direct it to the urinal. so he has scale and size perspective. he stands close to the urinal however. to retain hair colour.

[@CanItAlready]

Stephen forgot the Revolutionary Squabble. Not many people know about it. Very important Squabble. Possibly the most important Squabble ever.

[@voodoodummie]

You can even go to other countries. 'World squabble one and two.' Then there was the hundred year 'fuss' between france and england and the religious 30 years 'falling out.'

[@CanItAlready]

voodoodummie LOL. trump doesn't know about those others yet. And he's like Kelly Bundy. If you try to put to much info into his head it pushes other stuff out.

[@rochester212]

Americans be like: "We don't want any socialism in these here parts, we support free trade". Also americans: "Welfare, subsidies and bailouts? Yes please. "

[@chezmoi42]

Corporate welfare, that is. "No way we're helping poor folks, that's socialism."

[@veganperson]

A lot of Americans don’t understand what socialism is, and all of the tRumpsters have no idea what socialism means.

[@sandywichmann9292]

OmG, get Grandpa President a place in a nursing home. He can talk to some other people with dementia there..

[@katiekane5247]

@Fish Biz every bit as brilliant as you, amirite?

[@Chunkboi]

Fish Biz unlike you, he has a clue. Stop projecting.

[@jc.1191]

He's a malignant narcissist. He isn't in reality, he's gaslighting. It just looks like dementia.

[@ursaltydog]

Can we send Trump as part of those 120K soldiers?

[@vietnamd0820]

ursaltydog He’d love to fight but bone spurs

[@ursaltydog]

@@vietnamd0820 Well.. they have podiatrists for that these days... :)

[@g0679]

ursaltydog How about his offspring? Or, dare I say, THEIR offspring?

[@dennisshady3123]

Trump would be a great warrior but he would use the wrong end of the gun

[@munnawarhasham6553]

Oooohhh but I am such a patriot that I am willing to make the sacrifice of 120k soldiers. I mean it's a small price to pay for my unbounded patriotism. Mr. TurdyTrump why don't you just stop wasting American as well as Iranian and Israeli lives??? Give up this idiotic warmongering please. I hope and pray you Americans stand up to this bully and not be dragged into a conflict that nobody wants.

[@mayap6055]

Jon's trade war music is THE BEST he should play more :))

[@intrestinman3008]

All talk "Farmers"; exactly who're these farmers? Big AG disguised as Norman Rockwellers? or family small Biz??

[@erniew5805]

i was listening to ND senator Hoeven talk about the AG secretary sonny perdue .Hoeven said perdue knows because he is a farmer. now i'm sure perdue has sat in a tractor for a photo op . but i doubt perdue could operate a tractor.

[@carlsenawo3256]

We have a narcissist in office 🤦‍♂️

[@RIXRADvidz]

and since we've identified what it is, it is easily manipulated with ego stroking and affirmations of his bad behavior, we can also drive him crazier, easily.

[@eugeneaxe]

Not just a narcissist, but a dumbass too.

[@miskatonicalumni5612]

Tuck Frump! Vote blue to save America!

[@alejandrooonec6849]

CIA_Proxy I can’t tuck my frump it’s too sloppy

[@kimberlydrusch8036]

VOTE BLUE NO MATTER WHO👍💙💙

[@Nick30468]

vote blue, or vote proper reds to clean up the damn mess the GOP has turned into. There's nothing inherently wrong with conservative stand points (got to have the fiscal responsibility to go hand in hand with progressive ideas to head into the future after all), but damn that party has gone so far off base into crazy territory.

[@notsure1969]

Truck Fump

[@candywarmuth2455]

Not any blue will do.

[@Bord750]

Love that he threw a quick bit of 'if I only had a brain' on the piano.

[@conniecrawford5231]

Trump is always talking about “ratings” like every desperate TV failure whose show got canceled and his feelings are still hurt!

[@hazelmccloy1136]

He lost the biggest ratings in 2016 by 3 million. sad. Haha

[@garyrodgers7883]

More coverage of Andrew Yang. He is our only chance to beat Trump! yang2020.com

[@KlassyKat45]

I didn't watch that's for sure and was shocked in the morning, then worried...still am. He's so full of himself. he's done nothing. He only talks about himself...me, me, me. I, I, I...

[@phyllishahart6111]

No getting my order wrong at In-and-Out Berder is a little squabble. This is the Mad Queen burning down Kings Landing! Tf!?

[@seapearltoo1]

WTF is a "Berder"?

[@phyllishahart6111]

seapearltoo1 ask your president

[@jonthompson7106]

@@seapearltoo1 Trump wrote a tweet about "hamberders", it was when he had that fast food buffet in the White House for the sports players.

[@chriss.2279]

Everyday the bounds of sanity get stretched a bit further..

[@1Kent]

I heard a snap!😒

[@ARepublicIfYouCanKeepIt]

Oh, how easy it is for the privileged to glibly discuss sacrifice. Sacrifice they themselves don't make. The agricultural sector of our economy is already paying a terrible price for 45's capricious tariffs. Now, many other sectors of the economy are poised to join them in their hardship. Senator Cotton, either answer questions, or don't accept news program bookings only to waste our time. The sacrifice of American farmers has nothing whatsoever to do with veterans or those who gave their lives in service to our country, so why bring it up?

[@twilightgardenspresentatio6384]

John Coloe but hell just give them another 16B in payouts in addition to the subsidies they already get. At least it’s not socialism for the poor huh. It ain’t democracy either

[@scottrowe533]

"Today, I believe [Trump] went to Louisiana... the 'Big Sleazy' in the 'Big Easy'." Hah! 😛

[@AmberAmbwee]

Trump: “buy from countries I will personally benefit from.”

[@sjs9698]

also: 'pretend to be impressed by my statesmanship, or i will throw my toys out of the pram, a hissy fit, & maybe some nukes at you'

[@sjs9698]

ah balls; he probably couldn't spell statesmanship with spellcheck on. nevermind.

[@cmdraftbrn]

like china and mexico

[@international-arms-dealer]

gee, 120k soldiers back to the middle east.. sounds expensive.

[@Nyotakikora1]

Yes, so send him, and the other politicians over, and watch that suggestion be thought over. He has not concern for other peoples lives, other than his own.

[@karlfranzemperorofmandefil5547]

Dosent it cost like a Million per year per solider to keep them in active combat ?

[@TheBlackbudda08]

Most people dont realize, it not just the Military..Its those Companies with Military Contract that will prosper...LogCap V ...83 Billion Dollars...And NONE of that goes to the "Boots On Ground"!!!

[@couragekarnga8735]

I'm terrified Trump will actually start a real war with Iran. Gods help us!

[@ladeakin01]

"I think it's fake news. Would I do that? Absolutely!" 🤣🤣

[@nancychandler367]

You are cracking me up! Pick me up off the floor...Colbert for Senate!!!

[@shanadir]

I don't know anyone who watched the 2016 election. Nobody thought America would be this dumb...

[@sjs9698]

o/ i did. tedious as fuck. then that horrible realisation that the person clearly lagging in second place had won. that was... confusing.

[@rubendez]

Unfortunarly the whole world has to pay for your mistake in the wh.

[@karlblume9419]

I would apologize for it, but that I have fought against it since the escalator ride in 2015.

[@katiekane5247]

@Fish Biz GAG is more like it! BTW, subsidies to farmers are socialism friend.

[@sjs9698]

@@katiekane5247 socialism for the already wealthy is already ion full swing with centuries of best practice to back it up. they call it capitalism & pretend it's a meritocratic system. that it almost (to be fair, some folk did get lucky) completely follows hereditary rules is... ignored by it's supporters. time for socialism for everyone else, too.

[@katiekane5247]

@@sjs9698 I agree!

[@babbar123]

“..... and the green thing you take off the burger..” LOLLLZZZ

[@KenHeslip]

Sure Trump cares about birds. If he did he'd declare a climate and biodiversity emergency.

[@agoblintrippingonhorrordus145]

You have a very valid point 😂

[@molchmolchmolchmolch]

I want the full song from Jon for "Trade War". I love the funk

[@UltimateOmegaRed]

Well, that's Donald Dump for you!

[@benrosebery]

jazz law again requires me to comment, big ups to john with giant steps at the end

[@conanthebarbarian8783]

You know what's funny is I predicted Trump would end up dragging us into another war...

[@SteadyGhetner]

That's not funny.

[@IrisGoodfellow]

"One of the highest rated days in the history of television" reminds me of the scene in Miss Congeniality where the contestant is asked what she thinks of as a perfect date. And she answers 'the 25th of April".

[@DasVERMiT]

5:49 - Too perfect how Jon goes into _"If I Only Had a Brain"_ from The Wizard of Oz, lol.

[@Cybershock180]

Damn and now where is trumps 🧠 because he can sure use one. that is to bad the wizard only had one 🧠 instead of two because trump really needs a 🧠 badly or even a ❤️ because I think he needs a ❤️ more than he needs a brain.

[@nozecone]

"If I only had a brain!" - Well played, Mr Batiste!

[@laughinggirl1871]

"Trade War, Huh!!"...Love it!😄😄😄

[@Leslie58]

WEEEEEEEEEE are so screwed.

[@RIXRADvidz]

unless you elect a woman President in 2020 and Kick Trump In the BaLLS

[@BarbaraDr2023]

... "the civil squabble, world squabble 1, world squabble 2..." Priceless.

[@kittykat981]

💀💀💀💀😭 love this 😭😭😭😂😂😂😭🤧

[@CrimsonBlasphemy]

The 7 years squabble. The Mexican American squabble. The Crimean squabble.

[@catnekokotyonok5180]

Jon Batiste's "Ornithology" & "If I Only Had a Brain": so on point! 😂 Pure genius! 🎶

[@bluegreenglue6565]

Will no one rid us of this troublesome president?

[@Noellep]

@Cynthia n/a Henry II.

[@Noellep]

@Cynthia n/a You said Henry VIII because Trump is (sadly) on all our minds and he's a lot closer to Henry VIII than Henry II!

[@nativelatinosfooktrump5348]

🍔Trump made up his own charity and stole from it and bought two portraits of himself and a team Tebow helmet

[@f_USAF-Lt.G]

That sneaker with a Trump sock is Turd-course Hey, fun fact: Trump was in the movie "Wierd Science" as Chet's stunt man for the housefly scene.

[@traekas7228]

Daniel Evans, really?

[@Colin.Smith.Pianist]

Anyone notice when John played, "If I Only Had a Brain?" Lol

[@JamesDaffyBenderDonald]

Trump's already lost support of the Iowa farmers, one even said he voted for him in 2016 and he'll never do it again.

[@bobbiedodds2289]

"Neck Magazine's Neck of the Year!" 😂🤣😂🤣😂⚰️

[@miskatonicalumni5612]

Trump is the kind of guy who would invest in payphones to make money in 2019...

[@FakeSchrodingersCat]

It all makes sense now that's why the trade war. It's 5D chess you escalate until you can get away with putting massive tariffs on cell phones making them even more expensive and monopolize the resulting payphone industry. It's genius I tell you.

[@miskatonicalumni5612]

@@FakeSchrodingersCat lulz

[@tuckerbowen4626]

6:35 you're seriously asking if he understands something? we've been dealing with this nightmare for over 2 years, you should know better by now.

[@13thAMG]

Best part of this video - not lost on me when John Baptiste played a quick reference to 'If I only Had a Brain' from the Wizard of Oz in the background. 05:50 Anyone else catch it? Hilarious! Just perfect.