Try Not To Laugh - Theo Von - PART 1

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Theodor Capitani Von Kurnatowski is known best for his unique style of making people laugh through real life stories and larger than life analogies. His podcast "This Past Weekend" is one of the best in the game, but he can be just as hilarious as a guest. These are some of those best guest moments that are too funny to not laugh. Thank you for watching!
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[@pman07]

“and what’d you get? just better?” 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@qu1t88]

This hit me so hard!! I am in tears 😂😂😂😂😂

[@jacobwilliams5584]

🐐

[@TinaMUFC10]

😭😭😭😭🤣

[@69cookiez]

I'm dead

[@tony2789]

Absolutely killed me 😂😂😂

[@maaaaaaaaaa247]

"i remember a time when i went 8 months without seeing my legs" Theo is fucking unreal lmao

[@ghhhp]

I understand tho I have full sleeve tattoos and tattoos on my neck and everything has them since I was 18 I haven’t noticed them in months I forget I have any til someone says something lol

[@captaintitan8885]

@@ghhhp who

[@imatowel5930]

@@captaintitan8885 me

[@notoprahwinfree3471]

@@captaintitan8885 your mom

[@captaintitan8885]

Asked

[@river3808]

I love Theo man, it’s like his brain’s both full and empty at the same time it’s crazy

[@toria165]

That is the PERFECT description of Theo!

[@zackgibson3389]

Some podcast he does with some intellectuals he actually says shit that makes me fucking think wow, this guy may not be retarded

[@youatemysandwich1]

So true!

[@sausagegabbagoochi1959]

👌

[@stormdog9169]

I think the guy's secretly brilliant--like crazy high EQ, can read a room like nobody's business--but he takes a page outa Norm's book and plays up the bumbling everyman. I don't know who the suicide guy was, but he was bringing up some heavy shit and Theo perfectly kept that shit lighthearted and from going off the rails into a pity party that nobody would want to listen to--not only that, but dropped that awesome line "What you just get better?" A guy can't Forrest Gump his way to being a successful and respected as Theo's becoming. I hope he's got a show somewhere with Mark Normand. That dude's just the opposite. He's like this robot savant telling these low brow bro boy jokes with fucking flawless timing and cadence. I think they'd be great together.

[@Irishperson1]

"This guy happens to he homeless...or doesn't know where his home is" I can't deal with Theo 😂😂😂

[@bellarose51]

I knew exactly what he meant tho Lmaoo

[@jeffhaggard4536]

Lol! That shits funny😅

[@MyshterT]

“Enough to dampen a small burger”

[@chrisarbour]

We'll use anything but the metric system lol

[@adengreekii4810]

Half a juice box . ......so exactly that amount 💯 🤣🤣🤣

[@chrisarbour]

@@adengreekii4810 juice boxes are usually around 8ish fl oz right? So you thinking around 4?

[@daltondukes1184]

I genuinely have no idea where he thinks of this shit🤣🤣

[@maxheadrone4725]

Fucking amazing.

[@BigUps-Bucket-Cat]

"I quit doing it 4 years ago when everyone else did" underrated

[@paleamigo8575]

🤣🤣🤣🤣 he remembered the exact time.🤣✌

[@bestdadakasongoku4157]

I watched that, paused, and looked for this comment

[@dgxgaminghd4191]

i knew someone would pickup on this line

[@CaptnBlasted]

All y’all racist lmao

[@ammagnolia]

Spot on

[@jack8162]

19:40 "you're not a fighter, you're truce lee" lmao, he is so quick with them

[@SeanT649]

Theo is an absolute diamond - he deserves every bit of success he gets the guy is 100% original and genuinely hilarious .

[@mantovannni]

I'd been sleeping on this, he is one of the funniest guys alive at this time in my opinion.

[@lukeplante5711]

“If people are color blind we gotta get them more colors” lol

[@CommissionerLofi]

Lol

[@thelegendnotmyth7071]

@@CommissionerLofi lol some how that makes fucking sense

[@MrSomeRedditor]

6:18 Joey's laugh sounds like somebody trying to jump start an ash tray.

[@murk4545]

Underrated comment

[@murk4545]

Laughed my ass off

[@williamivy7117]

His laugh is so worth of watching every episode.

[@ContentOverdrive123]

cap

[@montanaelkwhisperer1744]

With a riding lawn mower

[@Dmacxxx77]

"He thought the phone company fucked up" Dude I swear Theo is the most naturally funny person ever.

[@nurulhudah1200]

The combination of words his brain comes up with, just unmatched. My stomach hurts from laughing so much.

[@ThroughDarknessComesLight]

Damn your pretty

[@nickmclaren6844]

Seen this quote right after Theo said treat your nose to some free booty pasta lmfaoo

[@matthewwoodard825]

@nickmclaren6844 ironically that part played as I read your comment. I feel like we have some sort of connection

[@mikeb.529]

not only words; but how fast and smooth he transitions into goofy unbelievable shiz

[@archive8080]

"enough to dampen a burger?"

[@stephenkolman5727]

I've never seen Joey Diaz laugh so hard. Usually it's the other way around.

[@kellenwilson5483]

They were so destroyed 😂😂😂😂 shit was hilarious

[@landonwoods2408]

Joey loves Theo

[@maxheadrone4725]

That bit about the electric buzzing underwear had me fucking dying.

[@maxheadrone4725]

@@kellenwilson5483 several death stars involved

[@stevebanning902]

joey diaz isnt' funny and if you think he is you're dumb

[@007einstien]

Theo's a legit genius.

[@deanjuliano7849]

He's just been eating dolphin dandruff, doing dope. He Gets RURAL!

[@russellshoemaker4412]

@@deanjuliano7849 Out there makin pottery out of his d*@&.... long enough to get the sweats 😁

[@jarodpearcy9789]

savant

[@AcidAroma]

If Forest Gump was street smart.

[@doubleboy2388]

Bobby says he's a fuckin retard 😂

[@constantreader7483]

Theo is like Louisiana tried to reverse-engineer Patrick Swayze and ended up with something a lot more interesting.

[@sephy980]

this shoulda got more likes.

[@constantreader7483]

@@sephy980 I couldn't agree more 🤷🏼

[@ElkyBub]

I was just telling my son he needs to AI a scene of Swayze in Roadhouse!

[@sarah7895]

This is the funniest comment ever 😅

[@sethhall7554]

Theo is TRULY a different breed. If I could win a contest to hangout with someone for 24 hours I SWEAR TO GOD it would be Theo Von. Dude just issues happiness.

[@srsucioguapodelsur8845]

“I fuckin SPRAY-OUT on the AJ” THE GOAT

[@breewolf2530]

I lost my mind laughing so hard

[@deanjuliano7849]

Fr Fr, I had to wear Buzz Underwear for Urinators ... Til i was like 10. It's unfortunate.. If you had them, as well, I feel your pain

[@ryancaldeira3696]

THANK YOU I WAS LOOKING FOR THIS COMMENT LMAO

[@brockroundy9279]

I like how Theo genuinely thought the kids throwing ice rocks just wanted to help with the collection 😂😂

[@tanner9012]

He didn’t. It’s part of his comedy. Once he commits to a sentence he has to stick to it

[@A1-_-]

he’s not stupid. he’s a comedian

[@stevenmanwaring8943]

He's been a little odd for at least 20 years so it's definitely In the realm of possibility that he genuinely believed that.

[@stevenmanwaring8943]

@@RickyTikkiPaddy yep I think he has probably just been thinking that way for so long that it is basically who he is at this point thb. funny thing is I used to sound a lot like him. Like saying the same type of sht and blowing people's minds at the stuff I would say but much like it was for theo when he was on the road rules thing when he was like 18 he wasn't taken seriously at all and I had to fight for years to get out of that character and leave a lot of people and places behind to get respect. Can never say for sure but I do think people writing it off as just a character he plays is a little crazy because most people are just playing a character at least to some level

[@Tjnumber1]

Joey Diaz laughing omg 🤣 😆 😭 😂

[@specialperson170]

bro the most overlooked line is when he is asking said he loves the smell of some nice high heels

[@knife-chase]

Theo von and bobby lee work SO well together. They are the funniest combo of just two people talking about Jack shit.

[@heversantos7006]

Bobby Lee is the most un funniest comic of all time.

[@MrPaling12345]

​@@heversantos7006have you watched Brendan schaub

[@Gen7486]

“how much did you squirt? Like was it enough to dampen a small burger?” That literally lifted me off of my feet ffs 😂

[@NautilusGuitars]

Same here! haha. Absolutely bizarre string of words, especially in that content, in the best possible way. I legit don't think I've laughed that hard in a decade. The man just has an insane talent for random absurdity. Like, how do you possibly come up with that on the spot?!

[@Pr3st0ne]

"One time I went like 8 months without seeing my legs" Find me another human being that could possibly come up with that sentence other than Theo, lmao

[@oliverhart7013]

Bobby Lee was clearly hurt by them laughing at his body, but he fronted like he laughed with them. But we all knew, and Theo knew that it hurt him, because why wouldn't it, and we all would of preferred the story where we all said "fuck them bitches" then Bobby saying he laughed cuz it made him laugh how hard they were laughing..... In conclusion Theo would of pretended it was the first time Bobby ever seen his legs, just so the joke would of been funny instead of sad. Im stoned. Lol.

[@RanDoM5469]

@@oliverhart7013 Master observer.,

[@Frank7489]

@@oliverhart7013 I bet you’re right. A similar thing happens later in the vid where Bobby says kids threw ice rocks at him and Theo asks if it was because he collected them

[@spamreciever4208]

Gavin Free

[@throgwarhammer7162]

@@oliverhart7013, Jesus, dude. It's would HAVE. Would "of" is nonsense.

[@mrexion7851]

Theo is the most unintentionally funny person on the planet. I love how his brain works!😂

[@w8m4n]

So you've never heard of Karl Pilkington? If not get on that shit.

[@shawnmclean7932]

With Ricky Gervais. Hours of funny.

[@cognome555]

Its intentional

[@bojiden9830]

I like how theo is telling his story and Joey is sitting there passed out from laughter & being completely blitzed

[@sp10sn]

"I could get a new job!" Theo's heart on his sleeve 😍😅😍

[@paleamigo8575]

That was the best response to an attractive woman.🤣👍

[@kevinramirez8817]

Who is she?

[@blablablabla691]

@@kevinramirez8817 Bobby Lee's girl

[@andreranch6161]

“I quit doing it maybe 4 years ago” 🤣🤣

[@dfields7851]

“When everyone else stopped too” lmao😂

[@goncalobaia1574]

I like that Theo's Conversation are like soap Opera, you miss a single like line you don't know where the fuck you are anymore.

[@jamesdemonte5749]

"dampen a small burger" is probably the best line of all time

[@Gunfutaku]

"Could you smell the shoes too?" that shit had me fucking crying

[@Buddhapyro]

Shopping for peppermint

[@IdLike2Apologize2AbsolutelyNo1]

Was it cold?

[@jacobbenham3521]

“Treat ya snout to some of that free booty pasta” Theo is the funniest 😂

[@VieraXXII]

I just heard that part! Ewww lmao! 😂😂😂🤢

[@Rambutan.]

What is booty pasta lol?

[@jacobbenham3521]

@@Rambutan. farts lol

[@jaybiggsthegreat5990]

"Treat your snout to some of that free booty pasta" legendary line😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@Bustmychoad]

“I think if people are colorblind, we gotta get them more colors”😂😂😂😂

[@mizzop]

"Sometimes I'll ask the waiter if the salmon is male or female" took me out💀💀

[@rouxcozy]

“David-coppin’-feels” Omg hahahaha that is gold

[@dominichahn169]

Glad I wasn’t the only one who saw that

[@austinrodriguez2481]

And you are a dime and! Lol 💎

[@derektrujillo2292]

😂🤣😂🤣

[@RogueStatusQVX]

Man... Classic Theo and Joey, sad it'll never be that way again. Such good pods with them

[@BrucifyMe]

Just doing different things now or was there some kinda drama between them?

[@snoweu]

“You can’t water a plant can you? Is it enough to dampen a small burger?”😂😂😂😂

[@MommyMoments855]

I'm always scared Joey is just gonna die laughing like that...sound's like his soul is saying "peace out fuckerz"

[@AlexRodriguez-if7wu]

Theo will kill Joey one of these days 😭😂

[@Waybay-fy4bh]

foreal though💀🤣

[@nickandrews2255]

Deadset makes me laugh more

[@Soyuz2578]

Don't think he would use the Z though

[@patrickozigbu4011]

Listening to Theo will leave you in a constant state of concern and amusement at the same time 😂😂😂

[@DirtyD218]

Haha right! Exactly what I thought! Like shit he says is so of the walls and funny but then you think about it and he just thinks it's normal and it's definitely not haha! It's actually very weird to think like that by be makes it funny. You can tell some of the stuff he says he's wondering why people are laughing cause he's just being genuine and he thinks they're just laughing at him but they're not. It's because they think he's trying to be funny. But he's not that's just his natural reaction haha

[@ancientsoul5608]

This is probably the most accurate comment I've ever seen on KZbin

[@BeSome1]

Theo's "I don't do it unless you do" joke kills me everytime lmao

[@somesandman8328]

5:43 Joey Diaz losing his ability to speak and just wheeze for the entire clip is cherry on top 😂😂😂

[@samwhitehall8545]

I’ve tried falling to sleep listening to this, I’m now laid on the couch due to my constant childish giggling. Totally worth it.

[@peet777]

And I tried ODing on vitamins

[@Burningwoodz]

i didnt lol one time i dont find this man funny its like ppl are afraid to offend anyone and comedy is not what it use to be bc of it

[@ohh1065]

@@Burningwoodz comedy is subjective quit acting special because you like “dark humor” you seem real corny

[@doubleboy2388]

@@Burningwoodz you're trippin

[@Burningwoodz]

@@doubleboy2388 its my opinion.... cant really be trippin bc of it lmno cant even have those anymore i c

[@ifuckingh8you195]

‘Your truce Lee’. is one of Theo’s underrated lines

[@gdaily5]

Once I heard that, I instantly searched the comments. Can't believe it wasn't mentioned. Underrated is an understatement.

[@iStabSnipers]

Theo - "He said I'm like LT Dan if he still had his legs" Also Theo - " I remember a time I didn't see my legs for 8 months" Man's is already training for the part 🤣💀

[@evanmcgillicutty3808]

“you’re like the Larry Fitzgerald of therapy” 😂😂

[@RoadRunneR69]

Eddie Bravo : I tried to OD on a bottle of Vitamins. Theo : What happened, did you just get better? 😂 There's nobody out there right now, who's wittier than Theo.

[@doggystyla6969]

Lol literally came to the comments section just for this 😂

[@RoadRunneR69]

@@doggystyla6969 Comment sections never disappoint!

[@theconfusedmango1719]

@@doggystyla6969 same here, absolutely hilarious

[@RIPmichealjackson10]

Omfg hes just so quick theo

[@aprilcallans5819]

Goes back and forth between bill burr and Theo

[@grants2125]

Theo is the most underrated comedian alive imo.

[@mayn90s19]

There's also schulz.

[@CimonSowel1]

The dude is another level could watch his stuff for hours

[@kurt6447]

He sells out venues around the world. Totally underrated!

[@mhunt25]

Agreed

[@blessed6336]

@@mayn90s19 idk about schulz i did like him but there’s something about the randomness in von he’s just so unpredictable

[@ohmar7582]

Mans too funny and you can tell it’s effortless 😂

[@Queendomcruz]

Theo makes me laugh out loud in regular conversation meanwhile I can’t even crack a smile watching major comics stand up specials there’s nobody like him

[@RockinTheDub]

3:11 Theo coming up with his own measurement for squirt on the spot. I cannot describe his genius in words.

[@truwth]

17:06 "he's change a lot" Best line is just a throwaway

[@CodyAnderson333]

Some of Theo's throw away lines are better than most comedians closers lol

[@OnPointFirearms]

Shit was so funny!

[@jenniferewing3784]

Omg yassss

[@jacobholguin6855]

“Woa this one’s shaped like rosie o Donnell” Bobby Lee with the funniest quote in a Theo comp

[@GarrettLoganGriffin]

Theo is one of the most naturally funny people out there.

[@AVandug]

Man I managed to hold my laugh inside until Uncle Joey busted out laughing his ass off listening to Theo talk about his buzzer underwear. I lose it everytime I hear Joey laugh, it's so contagious

[@Ghoopty]

Yeh his laugh is fucking awesome.

[@yadevumesh9267]

Its reminiscent to a komodo dragon's hiss...trust me. KZbin it

[@krs-fltutorials4487]

Sounds like a man close to death

[@BIG_SCRIMM_69]

I spray out on the AJ 🤣🤣🤣

[@alfiegordon9013]

@@yadevumesh9267 holy shit that's exactly what it is lmaooooo

[@connorr7992]

12:48 "they're not in prison cuz they know how to hold back" -Lee I fully died😂😂😂😂😂

[@paleamigo8575]

"In Gary, IN you're an 8, on the female chart..."🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@JS-nu3kv]

Underrated lines "You can't water a plant or anything?" "He's changed a lot" 😂😂😂😂 So many of his gems just fly by you & his guests ..until u listen again

[@garrettsmith6549]

You know you’re funny as hell if you get Joey laughin like that 😂

[@ross8525]

Yes Joke Wrld ur work rate is mad thanks for the content.

[@Three2Juan]

Forreals man. Just subscribed

[@DNYGdj]

Legend

[@lachietzarov2585]

not his content

[@user-mx7ux8je7g]

@@lachietzarov2585 Who said it was

[@evsrax9556]

@@user-mx7ux8je7g did the op not thank him for the content? Yeah he didnt say it was his, but did theo ask him for this? No...

[@semanticsdictionary]

Theo is so good. Even when he breaks character he’s still genuinely funny.

[@RighteousBrother]

Is it a character ?

[@vintz3327]

There's no character, Theo is Theo.

[@Cavemanbot]

Watch the show he was on when he was a kid he’s still Theo

[@RazielRodriguezz]

He can exaggerate his character but it’s not an act that’s Theo

[@sidda3262]

Breaks character? Lol this whole time you’ve been thinking Theo is playing a character? You’re not giving him the credit he deserves lol

[@chucknorris4062]

"He's like a prison ham, I love that boy" lmaoo

[@GhostandtheDarkness]

“Enough to dampen a small burger?” 🤣🤣🤣🤣Love how his mind works. 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@thedrummerdamo]

Joeys reaction to the buzzer underwear is easily the best part of this

[@scroopynoopers2892]

" I tried to OD on vitamins when I was 8." " And what did you get, better?"

[@jacksonorbin8310]

Theo will say the craziest shit and say “you know” like nah we don’t bro

[@angelo80409]

"I remember one girl, I was just dumb wrestling down there." 🤣🤣 That had my dying.

[@charlesprice5.0]

6:50 “Give me a pair lee”😂😂!! I love joey dude

[@alexcoyg3281]

"...or Maybe its Maybeline"😂😂😂 gets me everytime

[@Bbarnacles50]

“He’s changed a lot” 😂😂 dude I cant deal with the stuff he says

[@derekhammer8988]

Theo killing joey and Lee with the pee story brings tears to my eyes. Hilarious 😂

[@22hogfan94]

I’ve never wanted to be friends with someone so badly lmaooo

[@prodbyprimal3729]

“I once went 8 months without seeing my legs” I wonder what goes through theo’s mind😂😂😂

[@moneymack7940]

When he said “how far tho? Like you can’t water a plant or anything right?” I lost my damn mind talking about her squirtin 😂

[@placidcasual9872]

Theo is a. pure prince. Truly one of one - as real and humble as they come and a totally one off talent

[@braedendavis8972]

"I spray hard on the AJ bruh"😂😂😂

[@zaneyoung6129]

The KZbin algorithm has been absolutely terrible lately, these are the only videos I look forward too or click on, you are singlehandedly saving KZbin.

[@lmpfunk]

It really has been absolute trash. Wtf is going on?

[@deanjuliano7849]

Exhibit A

[@FreddySaySo]

Imagine depending on algorithm, you sorry piece of shit

[@zaneyoung6129]

@@FreddySaySo ok

[@Murphthemick]

@@FreddySaySo preach

[@JoseFuentes-fn3dl]

I don't think I've heard anybody come up with the most random stories before lol his storytelling is hilarious 😂

[@chrisstopher6858]

That scene with the buzzer pants and Joey Diaz made me laugh the loudest in my entire life. Omfg 😂

[@brianlaurito6540]

I spray out on the AJ !😂

[@sdm12342002]

"0-2 in thumb wrestling." Hilarious.

[@andreranch6161]

Once again doing the Lords work

[@williambouldin1037]

He's like my next door neighbor who has more stories than years in his life but a laughter will ensue

[@haroldwhitney6130]

He's my favorite comedic personality these days. It's amazing how naturally funny he is... And he seems like such a decent and genuine person too.

[@zexter33]

“Aye you remember Wallace”😂😂😂😂the dude definitely was killing the vibe but props to Theo for being a real one

[@xmasonx6094]

“I feel like if people are color blind…. We gotta get em more colors”😭😭😭 I love this man

[@josephindorf759]

At 3:30 😂😂😂😂😭 "how much tho like enough to dampen a small burger?" 😂🤮

[@bigbootybastard6973]

Americans wil really use anything but the metric systems

[@catherinegilliam4202]

Theo Von is by far the sexiest comedian working right now.

[@brtecson]

5:40 I've never heard uncle joey laugh so hard, and i've heard him laugh hard many times

[@paleamigo8575]

I think uncle Joey, Tom Segura, and Joe rogan should all spend more time together.👍

[@CaptainKreepingDeath]

I've always been kind of hard on Theo for some reason, but "Enough to dampen a small burger?" just made me fucking cry laugh

[@maxheadrone4725]

I fully believe that just came out. Just pure spontaneous nectar.

[@NautilusGuitars]

Same here! That whole string of words in that context just blew my face off haha. I haven't laughed that hard in a decade. The fact that he just came up with that on the spot is so insane and shows how talented he is with random absurdity. I have no idea how a person can come up with something like that so effortlessly. He's definitely a comic who takes a bit of viewing to fully appreciate. He's just so fucking random it goes over your head if you're not prepared.

[@lauramorgan27]

Why does “dampen a small burger” make zero sense and perfect sense at the same time? 😂😂😂

[@roofcake8951]

"Treat your snout to some of that fuckin' free booty pasta, my bruh." This is the first time in my life I've sobbed at a joke.

[@doomboogie315]

20:25 I love how even Theo couldn't keep a straight face on this one

[@DR053]

“He thought the phone company had fucked up!” 🤣 ICONIC

[@13CL456]

“Treat your snout to some of that free booty pasta, bruh bruh” might be the most profound thing that I’ve ever heard uttered from another man’s mouth.

[@Alex2dope]

@ 26:35 when the producer replies “that’s false…. That’s fair” 😂💀

[@rancewhite9312]

I piss big on apple juice, I spray out on the AJ. 😂😂😂 that shit had me dying man. These uploads are legit perfect bro.😂

[@oni3161]

Theo Von is the only person that bring's out Joey Diaz's laugh that sounds like he's out of air so many times

[@nyla3431]

“I didn’t do slavery I’m good” sent me 😭😭😭

[@Cao024]

He said it’s like he was thumb wrestling down there 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 I can’t bro

[@sahillsekhon3]

The buzzer underwear bit just gets me everytime

[@oliverhart7013]

"....but he died man, my Grandfather died...." I hope he knows he didn't kill his Grandpa with his electric piss pants 🤣😂🤣

[@SeabeSlays]

“People used to throw ice rocks at my head in school.” “Why? Did you collect them or something?” 😂😂

[@ElijahRuelas]

“He said bless Theo so you know he was black.” 💀

[@nickklein9978]

One of the funniest things I’ve heard Theo say is when he said he was sweating like a sneeze stuck in a thick bitch!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Love this dude and Bobby Lee is just as funny!!

[@pauahunta1]

Or the time he told Bobby that his face looked like it was stuck halfway through a sneeze 😂😂😂