Twin Flames #7 - (Harmful Therapy) - Therapist Reacts

[@Stormy575]

Dr. Honda, I think my favorite thing about your videos is the instruction around what helps a person and what hurts them, and how I as a non-clinician can support the relationships and people in my world. For instance, one of the best things I've learned from you is how sharing stories about our trauma can actually re-traumatize us. I have been in situations in the past where, if I'd known, I could have helped to protect people I care about from doing that to themselves. Now I feel like if someone ever decides to open themselves up and share traumatic experiences with me, I can receive them with even more kindness, gentleness and love. Thank you for this gift ❤

[@fra7637]

This is very interesting. As a psychologist and a scientist I did a bit of reasearch on this MAP technique.I found something that makes it even worse. Dr. Kay, or Emerick, or whatever she is called, is not even a licenced clinician, she has a phd in something complety unrelated, "public safety leadership" (it's stated on their MAP website). Plus, the website contains a lot of what I believe to be fake data graphs that should convince people there is something scientific behind it. I don't know the law in the US, but showing fake data and claiming something is scientific, and having a person not qualified to "treat" trauma, shouldn't be legal.

[@Carmendot2]

10:03 I appreciate you talking about it. Often times the phrase I hear from people is “well they need a professional, they need to go to therapy” but therapy is a privilege and it’s not the only solution. On top of that, there are a lot of times therapy does more harm than good, and it’s up to the person seeking help to heal. I find a lot of people are spending thousands of dollars on therapists just to have these experiences, because they’re told it’s the solution and expectation if someone wants to heal or better themselves.

[@em8066]

Your initial discussion of trauma and what PTSD triggers look like was so helpful. You basically described my own experiences.

[@melaniedelaware7500]

I was more traumatized by the people who refused to believe that I had been sexually abused, than by the abuse itself. Just me?

[@nursetinalouise]

Nope that’s typical for us.

[@angelarosa1995]

I have also had that experience. It was much more damaging and made trying to move forward with life a lot harder.

[@ZinniaGulden]

I think this is pretty common because usually the abuse stops, but the gaslighting and invalidation never stops. It becomes our inner voice. Plus there’s so much content on the internet and other places of people invalidating trauma survivors. It’s torture.

[@dharmafey]

This fits. Statistically speaking, children ARE very resilient. If they're harmed by someone, and their caregivers respond appropriately with dismay/horror, reassurance of their love and the blamelessness of the child, and follow through with protecting and supporting them, those children do (relatively) easily 'recover' and integrate the experience going forward. It's the invalidation, blame, denial, etc that makes it SO much more... I don't know... Persistent?

[@flowerjpotter1629]

​@@dharmafey I agree with you. The protection of a family member predator can last a life time and be a very negative and constant force against the victim. It's sickening stuff.

[@Zelda0Lah]

I am LOVING this video series.

[@marinakapes3958]

Kirk I think you’ll be happy to know that I graduated last year with my masters in counseling and we had a required full trauma class where we learned the triphasic model of trauma treatment! So I’m not an expert but I at least was trained to not jump into trauma and how dangerous that can be for a clients wellbeing!

[@d.d.1397]

This was actually helpful to know because I’m so disassociated all the time since I was a kid. Was interesting to hear you talk aboutnit

[@tammy7093]

Heck ya keep ‘em comin❤

[@julianareider]

Wow the description of the ptsd treatment protocol was fascinating

[@robinblossom5197]

Look up Mind Alignment Process. Jeff "Divine" who appears to be this same man claims to be the creator and founder of MAP inc. they are offering online trauma resolution for 1200 USD for 90min. thats what I found. This guy is a real menace. I hope his victims get support and legal representation to shut him down. I am shocked!

[@snoot4873]

I looked at this too and they have 0 credentials yet promote this. Then I for fun took that quiz to see if you qualify for MAP. They refuse to help you unless you agree to 1. Post publicly on social media about doing MAP and brag about it and 2. You must tell others to recommend MAP so seriously using this to force people if they want help they have to essentially act like MLMs for them absolutely disgusting this is allowed

[@Ms.Prairie]

Thank you, Dr. Honda. Thank you for giving these survivors a louder voice. ❤ I can’t bear to watch this doc in full yet (or maybe ever), and I appreciate your coverage of it, so much. So much. I come from a critical feminist perspective, and have so many feelings about this cult, and women-on-women violations as phenomena in general, but can’t even stomach this particular relational ab**e. It was so systematic, and the digital nature of it makes it almost surreal levels of horror.

[@Ms.Prairie]

15:34 - This is like undergrad level knowledge! I think quite literally my first research paper for intro psych we went over of the importance of peer-review to science as an ENTIRE field for like, two full days! How on earth did she sleep at night while doing and justifying this to people!

[@TrinityShining]

I recommend CBT/DBT for CPTSD. This is how my wife overcame hers. It also helped me hugely with pain management, enabling me to detect spasms before they occured and adjust my posture to avoid them.

[@unhumanhumour9264]

I have been doing some kind of a hypnosis therapy session once and I’ve been told that I’ve been seggually abused by my dad around the age of 1. An age that you can never can trace back to yourself, believed this and I’ve always wondered if it’s ok that this person told me this. I feel kind of weird about doing this and I would never do that again.

[@andietea8368]

I wonder if one of the reasons he wanted everyone to eat all the food and pushed the meal plans so much was just so he could sell/keep selling yet another product to his followers. It felt like he was just trying to get more money from the people he victimized.

[@craftymusiclistener]

I had a therapist convince me or insert traumas and memories into me and she would often reference her own experience and own trauma ……

[@dotthepenguin9348]

I had a different idea when I heard that guy saying that he became more attracted to his wife after she put on weight. My thought was skeptical, like, maybe he is just saying that he is more attracted to her now to try and convince her that he will find her attractive, and no one else will find her attractive. Unfortunately, thinness is celebrated in our society, so it might be the case that his wife would feel insecure about her size and feel she is unattractive. This could be a control tactic for him, like his wife, can’t leave him if she feels like no one else will be attracted to her. As far as his meal company… maybe he just came up with some random ass recipe that sounded tasty to him, realized they were not ideal for the members who were gaining unwanted weight, but felt like it would be “admitting he was wrong” if he adjusted the recipes.

[@dotthepenguin9348]

*** I say “ unfortunately thinness is celebrated” meaning that one body type is celebrated over other body types. It is ok to be thin! I’m trying to make a connection between society’s beauty standards and the cult leader restricting his victims autonomy.

[@baintreachas]

For the meals, it could be semi-purposeful, like- he wants to change their physicality somehow, but starvation might be a harder sell/counterproductive… and losing weight for most people seems to be harder than gaining weight… and/or he just has a feeder fetish, which (tho of course isn’t necessarily pathological, this is a cult leader) ties into the control thing in the same way

[@flowerjpotter1629]

I think the meal idea came about because he had someone from the restaurant industry high up in the cult and they used/exploited the skills their members had. The members putting on weight as a result was no doubt also useful in some way to the couple in charge, maybe it made Shalia more comfortable.

[@MoonWomanStudios]

I was studying to be a massage therapist and I had a teacher tell me I should stop talking about my trauma in therapy and start developing techniques for relaxation. She literally had no information on my trauma, dx, treatment, etc. It still pisses me off, it felt like bullying bc there wasn't anything I could do. I just basically had to nod along bc I just wanted to get my license and be able to work.

[@darter81]

My impression of the MAP woman is that she was already a member of TFU. Does anyone know if that’s correct?

[@louise3343]

Yes, she was and still is a follower, just like all the rest, they "move up the ranks", the more free labor they provide and money they make for J&S, the quicker they move up. None of them have any training, schooling, legitimate certifications etc...

[@Virginia312]

I actually speculated whether the food thing was actually his wife’s idea cause she wanted the woman to look more like her

[@dorazilwriting]

My last therapist was fine when I was like 13, but she changed. I saw her from like 13 to mid twenties. I took a break from therapy for about a year or so and went back... When I came back to her... She made me leave each session super stressed. She would be very analytical. Every feeling I felt and choice I made she would initially judge me for those feelings or choices. She would be telling me how much I needed to change. She would make me feel guilty for feeling the way I did. I would be so angry after every session, and super stressed out. I felt like I had to defend my feelings. What eventually made me leave is by having her tell me to take anti-depressants. I told her for years that I don't want her to refer drugs or anything, and it was bypassed as she tried to tell me to take something I didn't need. She brought that up randomly in our last session.

[@nadinedirks2238]

Dr Honda can you talk about Shanda Van Der Ark??? Please

[@lulumoon6610]

I don’t think the woman in charge of the MAP program is even a clinician. As far as I understood it she’s a security officer or something like that?

[@lilyskye7279]

Yes!!

[@lulumoon6610]

@@lilyskye7279that makes it so much worse..

[@snoot4873]

Exactly she uses a random PhD that has nothing to do with anything medical to call herself a "doctor"

[@imhottequilabrown]

Yay!

[@rachelleeden8824]

Coincidentally I'm actually going through exposure therapy for my PTSD currently. We've made leaps of progress! Still a work in process though.

[@mazieferreira7757]

The way Jeff rubs his hands when he talks about finding clients on the internet is super disturbing to me. I've also noticed that many times he uses I/my (as he said my company), which feels to me as he has full control over Shaleia. In the documentary someone says that the food is about grounding, which is a real thing. Basically, these two use bits and pieces of Spiritual concepts as a cover up for being the charlatans that they really are

[@cpeters-clarke8788]

This happened to me. My PTSD was triggered in therapy. I wanted to move faster than I was ready for and it actually brought on suicidal ideation which led to some time in the hospital.

[@zimtapfel]

What are your thoughts on EMDR?

[@samanthas8340]

Dr. Honda has said recently and in other videos that the research for EMDR is unfounded. however, I always found that strange since all the students and teachers in my counseling program seem to be on board with it.

[@zimtapfel]

@@samanthas8340 Yes, my therapist too. And from what I’ve read, I thought science supported it?

[@samanthas8340]

to be more specific. I believe he said (this was probably over a year ago or more) that he/they defute the hypnotism piece and those techniques but that it is just as effective as trauma focused therapy

[@zimtapfel]

@@samanthas8340 Hmm, ok. But EMDR doesn’t have anything to do with hypnosis? Or am I misunderstanding you?

[@robinblossom5197]

EMDR is evidence based but the exact mechanism of effect is unknown. My understanding is that the skillful use of bilateral stimulation, resourcing and titration of remembering within the context of a therapeutic relationship support people to integrate the experiences that were once overwhelming and fragmented. There is plenty of literature on the method and its outcomes.

[@phancybandit1403]

Is this video cut off? Or is that just me?

[@dharmafey]

The MAP creator isn't even a clinician. They have a PhD in Public Safety Leadership.

[@andietea8368]

Thank you for mentioning this as it is an essential point. The person setting up the MAP process has no authority, education, skills etc to be treating PTSD or any other mental condition.

[@lulumoon6610]

Ah yes, I thought so too.. so irresponsible