Ubisoft just made an NFT game in 2024...

[@randomperson2797]

So update on this game: one player has figured out how to win every match before it begins and also make everyone else only match with them Game of the millennium

[@vytah]

Source? Because it would be really funny if it were true.

[@alexeistrife56]

@@vytah There's a post on the subreddit that seems to back up his claim.

[@gehthoffentlich]

@@alexeistrife56 people unironically make a subreddit for trash like this? :D

[@mattmurphy7030]

@@gehthoffentlichReddit is trash so it checks out

[@deltasaves]

Is this true MinMaxxing

[@Astar24653]

Dont worry guys the NEXT live service slop is gonna be the one! Infinite growth lets goooo

[@user-xsn5ozskwg]

The line can only go up!

[@hazukichanx408]

"It's not that the idea or the implementation are terrible, unrealistic or outright wishful thinking from beginning to end - the problem is clearly that the market is still in a process of maturing to its full ripeness, and an exceptionally bountiful harvest of eternally increasing profits is _really_ just around the corner for all of our lucky shareholders!" -Ubisoft, probably

[@bulutcagdas1071]

They already had R6 Siege as a successful live service game, yet they managed to run that game to the ground.

[@luciger_globus]

So Ubisoft just shutdown the studio who made the new prince of Persia, but surely we need to keep this crew around

[@RuruSS]

Yes! It's part of the lore now.

[@fnky]

Where my Dolmen NFT's, Ubisoft?! Huh?!

[@hazukichanx408]

Unfortunately, the Queen Caniptei miniatures underperformed slightly in the marketplace and Ubisoft decided that from now on, only irredeemably bad things will be made into scams. Not adorably bad things like Dolmen.

[@butchernachos7518]

I’m Dolmen’ing I’m Dolmen’ing 😂

[@BigColaize]

someone at ubisoft unironically thought that vaultlanders was a good concept to make a full game out of

[@Foxador]

Vaultlanders was at least more fun and had quicker matches It came at the cost of the entire borderlands series tho

[@SP_TOOP]

Another day, another attempt at going bankrupt by Ubisoft.

[@Foxador]

It's almost as if they want to be bought out

[@Xylophytae]

​@@Foxador at this point I'd genuinely believe that Ubisoft is actively seeking to destroy themselves so they can be acquired or something

[@greenhowie]

I have no idea how they keep convincing shareholders to give them more money. By this point, it would be weirder if it turned out they weren't laundering.

[@v00idless72]

Sony please buy us!😂​@@Xylophytae

[@IagoSB__0.0]

0:00 ubisoft launcher jump scare

[@amirsufyani6319]

When it gets too dark, turn on the light. Then when it gets too bright, turn on the air.

[@wingnutmcmoomoo494]

not saying the game is good but i figure the logic is that wind brings storms which blocks out the sun and creates/enhances darkness. But yeah i figured it just was trying to say "air=storms=stormclouds"... which is kind of the same sort of logic jumps as pokemons "airplanes can't fly with ice on their wings therefore ice is strong to flying creatures"

[@user-xsn5ozskwg]

@@wingnutmcmoomoo494 I think you're giving them too much credit, since dark defeats air. They probably just figured they wanted a third triad instead of a dyad and picked something that wasn't already used in the other two sets.

[@hazukichanx408]

And when it gets too airy, open a window and let in the dark void of space! It... almost makes sense, if you're on a space ship. And if we somehow forget how light and air work.

[@jordanlopez4131]

When im in a Destroy My Company speedrun contest and my opponent is Ubisoft 😢

[@user-xsn5ozskwg]

Setting up a crypto wallet is already a big ask for people, and getting money on one is even tougher if you wanna use it as a wallet and not for stashing unregistered securities. Ubisoft could've probably made *some* money if they just kept this slop-fest to the usual microtransaction lootbox fair, but they really decided to go out of their way to show they don't know the industry. Beet we see another round of massive layoffs next year.

[@hazukichanx408]

Well they have to keep firing people, otherwise how are they going to avoid accumulating competent staff with a sense of cohesion and camaraderie that would dramatically improve their productivity and performance? Don't want your company running _efficiently,_ after all! We want our company running _retardedly._ That's what the investors love to see.

[@derekha170]

Jauwn video boutta go crazy on this one

[@Accidental.Creation]

Leave it to Ubisoft to jump on a scam that hasn't been relevant for years now, lol. Then again, they tried to do it before with the whole Ubisoft Quartz thing, if I remember correctly.

[@Shocel53]

It's like if Darkest Dungeon was designed by the Ancestor.

[@fietehermans9903]

Why is one of the locations in their “lore” called Corporation Bastion? Sounds almost meta…

[@PenguinWithInternetAccess]

The little figurines reminded me of New Tales from the Borderlands and now I'm sad

[@wingnutmcmoomoo494]

i like that you're so used to saying bionicles that when you say chronicles you accidently add an "io" sound at the start so it sounds like cryonicals. I aspire to be as nerdy as that one day lol (i swear i dont' mean this in a mean or disparaging way)

[@jex-the-notebook-guy1002]

I played a bionicles gba game at my cousin's many years ago. Even watched some of the movies there. Cousin was into all sorts of stuff. Tamagachis neopets ect. I prob didn't understand the game but it seemed cool. Oh and UB Funkeys (what Skylanders copied). He also introduced me to Ben 10 (the first one)

[@horseman8249]

NOT DOLMEN, 0/10 >:(

[@nyyfandan]

"Animation" is generous term lol. Tell me why this new game has 1999 South Park level animations.

[@QQnowQQlater]

Darkest Dungeon: Like two or so of us made an amazing game on a small budget. Ubisoft: Copy that, spend less, make it beyond worse.

[@Liberater4589]

Incredible how Ubisoft used to be considered innovative industry leaders but now they’ve degraded being years behind in chasing whatever slop fad was popular at one point

[@Xylophytae]

I grew up with Far Cry 3. I miss that time in games

[@icecold1805]

that's what happens when you go public. Investors will keep demanding more growth out of you until you gotta scrap the bottom of the barrel to try to milk more out of your products.

[@_oBSOLEte_]

@@icecold1805 Sure. They went full public, that's the real problem. There's still a virtuous capitalism somewhere, where companies are run with tegridy and healthy nepotism is maintained for the board members like in the golden Atari days.

[@johng8837]

Valve​@@_oBSOLEte_

[@ChrisSmith-mi2zo]

Atari, Midway, Activision, EA, and Blizzard were all leading innovators at one time too. Konami only recently remembered that they used to make video games, and Sega and Capcom always seem to be teetering on collapse. Ubisoft is just the next great fall.

[@dr.trebuchet3836]

Well this has been fun, but I'm going to stop watching after 13 minutes. This game is even too boring for me to have on in the background. I'm sorry you had to play this Oboe. Ubisoft just keeps putting out the bangers.

[@nolandaigle7375]

Me 7 minutes in 😂😂😂

[@greenhowie]

Oh, wait. The setup screen with the model previews of the characters IS the game. Guess that the less gameplay there is, the less can go wrong.

[@Darthvegeta8000]

So a miniature wargame without terrain or movement...😂

[@wingnutmcmoomoo494]

i think its more like a darkest dungeon clone tbh. edit after watching like one more minute... yeah this is just a darkest dungeon clone, down to the zoom in slow down for each attack and everything else. The main twist they put on the gameplay is having it all happen at once.

[@hazukichanx408]

@@wingnutmcmoomoo494 The abilities and animations (what little there are) may be riffing off Darkest Dungeon, but they've also cleverly removed all the things that made Darkest Dungeon engaging, atmospheric, and a game at all. So now they've got... something. Not a video game, by any stretch, but definitely some kind of a _thing._ Yep!

[@blakksheep736]

​@@hazukichanx408 and then they added NFTs.

[@Dargos_L]

This is the best Shadow raid legends ads of my life

[@dominiklauko5288]

Just wait for the new FMV game by Ubisoft.

[@lionfighter10]

The joke is that this still has more effort put into than Star Wars Outlaws

[@BismuthKaiju]

as soon as the first image came up, before you said it, I was thinking that they just ripped pictures from Heroforge. Glad it wasn't just me.

[@CommanderGumball]

It's weird how close to not-shit the actual gameplay looks. Add some idle animations, take the bases away so they don't look as much like figurines, put 5-10% more effort into the attack animations, and it would honestly look completely fine.

[@myles_liem]

some voicelines too

[@CommanderGumball]

@@myles_liem yeah, even just a couple. Really they're like 90% of the way to a reasonable, acceptably crappy game. Nothing to write home about, basically a Darkest Dungeon ripoff with some more restrictions, but _something._ What they have here seems unfinished. The way the tap forward like South Park characters is what *really* gets me, just have them slide at that point.

[@EnderPlayerTV]

The "Private Club" secret cabal of people controlling the world through games of a dumbed down Warhammer game is kinda interesting, if they just didn't make the game an NFT thing and fleshed it out with some stuff as you said + perhaps add some more lore etc. this could've been interesting. But money is more important to Ubisoft

[@olivercharles2930]

Also, get rid of every single nft/nft-related BS.

[@thecolorsaqib]

A little late to a dead trend there Ubi

[@cookiecreep9204]

This is what i have in my mind whenever any of Ubislop PR guys wax on about how artistic and deep their stuff is, and how much care they put into gamemaking...

[@WorldGoods]

No one ever asks why gamers would want to keep playing this to spend money

[@root1992]

Darkest nft

[@AyCe]

Did they actually misspell "Aggressive"?

[@BRICKOMEDIA]

Heroforge + AI + NFTs... Such a uh... 'interesting' mix.

[@anon9469]

I will say, the aesthetic of this game is pretty neat. Like a skirmish wargame with videogame rules. It's just sort of ruined by being stapled to an NFT collection.

[@olivercharles2930]

"sort of" is an understatement

[@skizordrone3836]

They literally look like the dnd minis that you can make on heroforge. The more I look at them, I think they actually ARE heroforge minis

[@freepizza]

dolmoria chronicles

[@Bongyes]

Usually light is supereffective against darkness and darkness is supereffective against light in those gacha games. I mean they are opposites. Also Fire Emblem has light conquer darkness, darkness conquiering elements and elements conquering light.

[@delsin1126]

This looks like darkest dungeons mixed with hero forge and looks so damn boring

[@DarkAngel-jo8ix]

You, in fact, do have to watch dude swing sword in Raid

[@stinkygoat2686]

the lack of idle and tween animations cant help but make me think they thought it would be cute if they didn't have them but it just ruins any semblance of the game feeling active. At the very least they could of had like animated backgrounds that only play their animations during combat or pause during combat but play normally. anything to make up for the lack of movement on screen at pretty much all times on your turn.

[@the_femboy_gravemind]

0:35 omg tartarus halo

[@MesaAufenhand]

It's a scuffed darkest dungeon

[@mike42192]

Chat message at 9:31 really hurt me, on a personal level.

[@ChrisSmith-mi2zo]

13:50 "Wassup Oboe nation?" in the CODtuber voice always sounds like "What's a bobo nation?" to me.

[@wyattr7982]

Wait did you put the Metal Gear Solid theme in the beginning or did they rip that off?

[@MortiXD09]

looks good, in game ads would make it better though.

[@dektarey4024]

I'd enjoy some mail notifications send to my account reminding me i havent spend money yet. Set it on a timer of 7 days. And worded in a really saddened manner.

[@MortiXD09]

@@dektarey4024 nuhuh, it has to be daily. also another idea to use ai to try and seduce you into buying those things🤣

[@Zotjad]

In a better world this would have let you make and customize your units with all the NFTs elements and be a normal game.

[@DavidJCobb]

ubisoft is genuinely just an embarrassment to the medium at this point

[@burgerpocalypse]

This game was also probably funded by Singaporean tax breaks and they were obligated to release it despite... you know, everything about it

[@hazukichanx408]

Wow, that is some AI-ass "story" alright. Ghouls _and_ "Undeads"? And in terms of fantasy races, what exactly constitutes a "transhuman"? Or is it literally just a fantasy human with some bits of metal bolted to their body because hey, who has time for infections and pain thresholds and _general sanity_ when you could be bolting bits of metal to your body? ...Ooh, and they have a Special Powerful Mineral sharted into the middle of all that, too. That's cute, thinking off-brand Tiberium is a new idea.

[@Jokoko2828]

It's just a generic term soup you're not really supposed to pay any attention to.

[@filipwarpechowski6681]

My first though was, Darkest Dungeon at home ™️, but only in the overall systems and no art direction or... any direction tbh.

[@ninjamortyC420]

🎉 This is where the real game begins 🎉

[@eddygordoh6188]

That one guy was right, youre really hard to listen to, but i think you still will succeed. Good luck charlie kirk, keep on doing what you love to do.

[@nunyabusiness7942]

So it’s Darkest dungeon but not good at all in any way.

[@arataasuka6293]

is this Vaultlanders

[@keaganreis794]

Darkest Dungeon from Wish

[@cfunct645]

Soulless Multiplayer Darkest Dungeon

[@theevenstevenchannel8220]

Does this cost money?

[@Foxador]

It's "free" but it's just a way to launder money

[@TironaBloodspiller]

at least in shadow legends you get animations for being a whale

[@isuckatusernames4297]

could this be the next Distborn ?!?!?!

[@olaff4223]

What is this game?

[@blanketray6050]

18:08 undertale reference

[@arefuu6682]

I swear mobile game got more animation than this shit 😂😂😂

[@superbtrilogy5049]

0:00 BEST INTRO OF 2025

[@sergeyarkhipov3291]

💯

[@teddyboukagain9985]

Is this an AAAA NFT game?

[@isuckatusernames4297]

it's not even A game.

[@chinghamburger2200]

Ohh, Ubisoft. 🤡💩

[@JavierSantoz-qy9fp]

looks like that pay to win mobile game tho.

[@cheemslord9917]

wow so smart ubisoft clap clap

[@incorrectbeans]

iconic

[@aoihitori]

Money laundering for sure.

[@Seer_Xaeo]

looks like a terrible version of Moonbreaker

[@hurrweasel932]

Raid Shadow NFT's

[@thetoadwalker3010]

Raid: Shadow Legends is higher effort.

[@Chengeist]

This is the most boring "game" i have ever seen. 3500$ for one "champion"? 🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣

[@PandaPelley]

No idea how people can be so tilted about AI slop when there are people who use their time and effort to create NFTs

[@HydraKittten]

I mean, one is blatant theft and the other is scamming, pick your poison kinda thing, both Are bad

[@solitudesf8111]

you are not very smart, are you?

[@roflBeck]

We can dislike 2 things.

[@incorrectbeans]

​@@roflBeck impossible

[@olivercharles2930]

@@HydraKittten "blatant theft" if you are stupid, maybe.

[@chandlercharleville833]

Nfts arnt bad people just dont understand them and scammers used them before anything good did

[@olivercharles2930]

Nfts are inherently bad. At least with crypto it has some limited use outside glorified gambling, nfts don't.

[@LunarisCainLegacy]

This is the most Boring of all games and slow AF!!!