Рет қаралды 25,134
Patreon - / strelochka
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0:00 Greetings!
0:22 Paranoid + antisocial RO
deficit structure on the verge of psychosis
0:34 Trauma = violation of the integrity of the true self
2:02 Disintegration - a deep degree of traumatization, with a violation of the deepest basic need - safety
2:10 The true Self is strengthened through the love of the eyes that look at you - through reflection
2:19 Important Ukrainian KZbin channels:
-Karpanov Brothers
-Kulturtrigger
-Your underground humanitarian
-Dmytro Gorbatyuk
-Khashchi
3:05 Pathological schemes of Ukraine that prevent victory:
negativism
punitivity
distrust/expectation of offense
3:25 Schemes emerge as an adaptive way, but in the long run they hinder (change the future and do not reproduce the same scenario)
4:16 Punitivity: moralizing, categorizing, condemning
4:28 “Everyone should be punished, including me!”
7:26 Aggression against others = aggression against oneself
Anger at oneself = guilt
7:44 The punitivism scheme - Russian attempts to sow hatred in Ukraine to weaken it
9:26 How punitivity is treated
9:35 Punishment alone is not the most effective way to model behavior
+ Encouraging desired behavior is a good alternative
Democratic style is more effective than authoritarian style
10:51 Elements of the panacheer:
punishment
moralizing
condemnation
hypercriticism
sense of self-righteousness
categorization
11:08 How to correct:
1. Realize the scheme
2. Real me ≠ this scheme
3. Understand the source and origin of the schema
4. Want to get rid of it
12:30 The alternative to punitivity is mercy and empathy
13:39 Why did this RATIONAL ADAPTIVE person decide to do this?
If the intentions were good, will punishment help?
Isn't the price too high to destroy and hurt a person?
15:33 Punitive scheme - violation of the basic need for SAFETY
(when an attack is used as a preventive defense)
15:47 5 basic needs:
safety
love (acceptance)
boundaries/self-control
spontaneity/play
competence (autonomy)
17:12 Negativism scheme: pessimism, everything was and will be bad, fear of life
17:35 Mistakes in the past
Fear for the future
Focusing on the negative - pessimism
18:41 Distrust of the positive, fear of giving up survival and starting to live with pleasure
Main emotion: chronic anxiety or depression
Expectation of illness, poverty, fear of disasters + not understanding what I can rely on to cope with it
19:27 Fear as a form of protection from the world
20:07 An alternative to negativism = a little illusory optimism
20:30 Anxious and depressed people perceive life most adequately
Negativism → faith
21:48 The bad habit of the negativism pattern is lamenting and complaining about life
25:38 The fastest way to get rid of negativism = stop complaining about life!
26:07 How to fix it:
Real me ≠ negativity schema
I am not poor, sick and unhappy
I am strong, everything depends on me
27:34 Mistrust/expectation of harm: hostility and protection from people
27:49 Preventive distrust of everyone, even the closest people
Fear of disclosure
27:59 All people are potentially BAD - evil, will harm you: betray, hurt, offend
28:27 Intimacy = when you freely express ALL your emotions and thoughts sincerely
Intimacy is possible only in an atmosphere of safety!!!
28:40 Mistrust is a violation of the basic need for safety!
29:17 The idea of the world - whether it is safe or dangerous depends on the number of adults who smiled at you when you were 1 year old
31:10 Anxiety about life → curiosity about life
32:17 Distrust (100% of people are dangerous) → relative trust (there are 5-10-40% of safe people)
Negative emotional loop: I look at people negatively - this provokes a negative look in return
32:43 I treat people badly, so they treat me badly (cognitive distortion through projection)
33:15 We must learn to distinguish between people who can be trusted and people who cannot be trusted!
36:14 You have to dare to overcome fear and force yourself to trust those who meet your own criteria of trust