Unlikely agony aunt letters | Mock the Week - BBC

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Mock The Week | Series 17 Episode 9 | BBC
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[@VampireBuddha]

Dear Deidre I'm into sadism, necrophilia, and bestiality. Am I flogging a dead horse?

[@P0lkoli]

This doesn't make any sense. How can sadism, necrophilia and beastiality be a waste of time? Your joke doesn't have a double meaning

[@allycattiny]

I love how they all settled on the name "deidre"

[@TheTradge]

"Dear Deidre" is a well-known column in the Sun newspaper.

[@allycattiny]

@@TheTradge Oh... I don't read newspapers that often that must be why.

[@bartvandewalle4253]

You're being gentle, calling The Sun a 'newspaper'.

[@ziauddinkhan5699]

@@bartvandewalle4253 🤣🤣🤣

[@ScottishRebel]

@@bartvandewalle4253 i prefer to call it cheap toilet paper

[@SuicideBunny6]

"I just got my first period. Should I be worried?" - Dave, 32.

[@Tjalve70]

Well, Dave: That depends on whose period you got, and whether it was also their first period.

[@quizmaster85]

Dear Deidre, I have recurring nightmares of watching the same Scenes We'd Like to See every ten episodes or so. Could it be because of my best mate Dave?

[@mechislander]

Dear Deidre, There's a boy I'm going out with, but I think he's gay. Any advice? Yours, Steven.

[@amidar6634]

okay, this is great

[@lilDaveist]

Ok, I went to school with twins who dressed very - I don‘t know what the right word for it is.. androgynous? - boyish. They both dated girls and once I told someone „yeah yeah, the twins are lesbian“. He mentioned it in front of them and they were like „No, we aren’t lesbian“. Their reasoning? „The girls don‘t know we are women“

[@romainsavioz5466]

@@lilDaveist what age whould that be

[@lilDaveist]

Romain Savioz I was 13 years or so.

[@TheHollaata]

Got first period, Dave, 32 🤣

[@OldRaver]

the_Chil1One - 😂

[@louisa9238]

That one sent me 😂

[@BattyButtercup]

Idk if you did it on purpose or not but not ending that quote with a full stop was a mark of genius.

[@TheKermit2110]

Rachel Paris is supremely gorgeous!

[@TheTomLees]

Simmer down Nish, give everyone else a chance to have a go in this round!

[@brendanhunter389]

Tom Lees wasn't the right subject to re use his same jokes

[@daveharris8115]

@@brendanhunter389 Exactly, if it's not being a minority or Brexit, the guy has nothing.

[@raidus9949]

He did more in the actual uncut take

[@davew4998]

Dear Deirdre, I need a massive poo. Am I full of shit? Nish Kumar, 12.

[@AndersPuschel]

@@davew4998 Is he really full of anything other than hot air?

[@mdntctyvlcn]

I enjoy watching Rachel Parris roast the shit out of Nish both on MTW and Mash Report.

[@nothingtoseehere7554]

Lmaooo, Rachel Parris can’t pass on an opportunity to make fun of Nish

[@AutomaticDuck300]

Dear Deidre, My wife is cheating on me with a famous footballer. Would it be cheeky of me to ask him for a free season ticket?

[@CorrectionUnknown]

Sorry...this one was awful.

[@AutomaticDuck300]

@@CorrectionUnknown haha, not my best work admittedly.

[@haza6893]

@@CorrectionUnknown ah come on man that was a bit uncalled for, i thought it was good

[@AutomaticDuck300]

How about: Dear Deirdre, Thank you for the advice last week on how to make my wife scream during sex: by calling her up and telling her about it. Dear Deirdre, My girlfriend always wants to experiment in the bedroom but I'm really turned off by her wearing a lab coat. Dear Deirdre, My wife likes to role play as a prostitute in the bedroom but I can't afford her prices. Do I get a second job or try to negotiate her down?

[@jaggass]

''Im constantly accused of seeing people on the side by my girlfriend. Should i get my eyes straightened?''

[@CraneProductions27]

I love Ed's joke at 2:30. He really loves to celebrate his own way after delivering it. Dear Deidre, I'm a doctor, but one of the tools in the operating room scares me. I think I have a PROBElem.

[@rotflmfao3474]

Only just realised RACHEL PARRIS!!

[@TheTomLees]

Dear Deidre, I'm a student at the University of Lincoln, how can I be taken seriously?

[@olympicfitness]

Tom Lees Go to Bradford... 😜

[@conorgrogan5376]

Hahaha, everyone knows they're only 2...

[@marcusjohns5166]

Run up and down the hill to the cathedral 5 times a day and by the end of the week you WILL be taken seriously..... Ill. Yours, Deidre

[@aaronhurst4379]

Things must have been hard for you since the Inbetweeners took the piss out of Lincoln uni in that one episode :P

[@RK-ep8qy]

Tom Lees only talk to students who go to university of Huddersfield

[@mrgazzaw]

Dear Deidre, There's this bright light always in my eye, it blinds me whenever I'm, oh nevermind it's Dara's head

[@TheHollaata]

this was actually a good one

[@EvilOdysseus]

Dear Deidre, My doctor told me to contact all previous partners You should probably get checked out.

[@Me-fo1kk]

You could pull any joke off Ed.

[@wgeorge6048]

The two Ed’s hold this show together

[@retnavybrat]

0:51 -- The "wife's mother's daughter" could be his sister-in-law. 🙃

[@TheHollaata]

bollocks in a lift door 😂

[@MartinelunafayeWhitear21]

One best bits😂

[@chrisgarton4225]

Dear Auntie, Is uncle still there?

[@kedabro1957]

2:20 ... Can somebody explain this to me? (Russian accent) "I am very into steeples."

[@jonathanpatt]

'The two men identified as suspects in the Salisbury nerve agent attack have appeared on Russia’s state-funded TV station RT, claiming they visited the “wonderful” English city as tourists to see its cathedral. [...] Boshirov said the two had gone to visit Salisbury Cathedral, “famous not just in Europe, but in the whole world. It’s famous for its 123-metre spire, it’s famous for its clock, the first one [of its kind] ever created in the world, which is still working.” '

[@debrabelz]

@@jonathanpatt thanks. I thought it was spmething to do with melania

[@RachelJ715]

debrabelz Melania is from Slovenia

[@sugarnads]

@@jonathanpatt yeah thanks for that. Had no idea what she ws on about, but i am on the other side of the world.

[@OldRaver]

I was at this recording! (Sorry, just had to share)

[@jaggass]

Was the audience laughing or was there a laugh track?

[@Joleneeeeee]

We need a response

[@chalkish4855]

We need answers

[@brendanmccabe8373]

OldRaver1 still waiting for your answer

[@irelandaintreal2945]

we still want the answer man

[@andrewfenn3019]

Dear Diedree, Please help me with my chronic fear of long words. I believe my life gets harder each and every day due to my hippopotomonstrosesquipedalliophobia. ARGH!

[@jaggass]

''I have a problematic child who won't stop causing trouble. Should i have put something on the end of it?''

[@michaelwhalen1201]

Sorry Nish, I love Rachel. I want red wine😎

[@jaggass]

''Im unable to think straight these days but then i remembered why. I'm gay''

[@ZachsMind]

Dear Deirdre, I was told to get a life so I did. Now I'm married with two jobs, no free time and must adhere to what others expect of me. How do I give it back?

[@chrisgarton4225]

Dear Auntie, I only have ten seconds to write this letter. Sorry times up.

[@Dementiumfan1990]

Dear Abby, When Kings of Leon said "Your sex is on fire" did they actually mean that it would burst into flames like a Buddhist monk immolating himself? Help

[@corriedebeer799]

I must admit that man trapped in a woman's body line was great

[@simeonbaumel7293]

I was a man trapped in a woman's body..... but then i was born.

[@jaggass]

''Im thinking of placing my dead dog in the memorial section of the newspaper otherwise known as the obitchary''

[@hossinali1260]

Sehr schön und wunderbar

[@jaggass]

''Me and my partner have split up and she's took out a restraining order against me and i must stay 150yrds away from her. Why has she done this as im in prison?''

[@Mbeepyd]

The last one made me laugh the most

[@TheGrenfellRatio]

Dear Rumbelows, my telly isnt working. Please send me a replacement

[@FarshidBehroozianFB]

SUBTITLE PLEAS...!!

[@corriedebeer799]

Dear Deidre I don't think my girlfriend needs all this window cleaner anymore since I have started licking her windows.

[@cddb5408]

Why does Nish Kumar only ever do 1 joke when some others do 4 or 5? I didn't even notice he was there until it showed a close up of him near the end of the video just before he did that 1 joke....Which wasn't worth the wait either by the way.

[@OldRaver]

CD DB - I was at this recording- he did more in the first take... they had to reshoot though becuse the blonde lady was looking at the wrong camera in the first take! First take was funnier tbh. (blonde lady is not very funny at all.)

[@jaggass]

Does the audience laugh or is it a laughing track? some of the laughs sound the same.

[@aliceevans5465]

OldRaver1 just to remind you there are two blonde women! Maybe you could attempt to refer to her by name?

[@maddie_1122]

Because he only really does jokes about minorities and brexit

[@gwishart]

@@jaggass The audience really laughs, but the sound editors sometimes re-use laughter in other parts of the programme.

[@jaggass]

''As a registered blind person when do i know when to stop wiping my arse?''

[@joshuamartin4125]

Michael Langley when your guide dog says "woof"

[@gwishart]

When the paper no longer sticks to the wall.

[@iChillypepper]

I ❤️ Rachel

[@smiggy5768]

Are all Agony Aunts called Deirdre

[@jenh8056]

Yes

[@theguyinthefunnyhat]

Dear Deidre, I've noticed some changes with my body. My voice has dropped and I'm growing hair on my testicles. Is this normal? From Sally Shaw, aged 10.

[@kylestubbs8867]

No, I think it was age 9.

[@joshdowner6895]

nish only did one, right at the end

[@yusufgazi7]

3:13 why did nish get them he only spoke once

[@kylestubbs8867]

Because he only had one good joke.

[@corriedebeer799]

Dear deidre My boyfriend told me he is gay, but he eats sushi. I think he may be lying to me.

[@alexandrac6159]

What dose the buzzer mean?

[@gwishart]

"Next!"

[@sandmanjono1239]

Very funny - Rachel P - hot n funny girl, perfect 👌🏻

[@kettle2293]

Do they ever have female dominant panels?

[@TheyMadeMePickAName]

Maxx Kroes why? None of the dudes are

[@chrisgarton4225]

Dear Auntie, I can’t win any games against anyone. Please tell me how can I win a game if I have to let everyone else win?

[@Emily-yf7nh]

Who's Nishkooma?

[@spicypineapplez9445]

Kumar

[@count7340]

I think you'll find it's Nish insert-Brexit-or-race-joke-here Kumar.

[@gothnerd887]

Dear Deirdre The crazy girl at my school keeps nicking my boxers, how do I get her to stop? Edit: I meant boxer briefs

[@AndersPuschel]

Don't bring your dogs to school.

[@elaineb7065]

Take Dwayne Johnson next time

[@jaggass]

''My girlfriend is called Lana and i asked to spell her name backwards do you think i can persuade her to try it?''

[@NateSean]

Dear Abby, Does this smell like fish?

[@rexlongfellow]

Bro these commenters should be on the damn show😂😂😂

[@rebelraccoon9018]

This would suck without Ed Byrne

[@lewismurphy3499]

Amanda Cor and hugh

[@Nulono]

Steeples?

[@james.martin1187]

It's a Sailsbury Cathedral poisoning joke

[@Ma6ku6ta6]

Can someone explain the Scottish staples joke to me? 😛

[@james.martin1187]

I believe your on about the steeples. Its a Sailsbury Cathedral poisoning joke as the main suspects, from Russia, said that they traveled to see the famous steeple, the largest in europe and I believe they gave its exact height

[@chrisgarton4225]

My parents want me to donate clothes I want to keep. Can I just ask for a donation of money so that it looks like I gave clothes away?

[@rebekalanska2119]

What is agony aunts?

[@BadWebDiver]

A newspaper column where a psychologist (usually) answers submitted questions about people's personal problems - sex, relationships and other stuff. The most famous was Dear Abby in the US, and UK has a Dear Deidre.

[@borednow]

I dont get the steeples one...

[@TheTradge]

This episode was shot in the week of the Salisbury poisonings allegedly perpetrated by two Russian men, their excuse for being there was to "see Salisbury cathedral's famous 123 metre tall spire", it was discussed earlier in this programme (search for "mock the week Russian spies and wikipedia entries")

[@knwh172]

Can someone expalin the Steeples joke Im dumb

[@petertaylor4980]

I think it's a reference to Salisbury cathedral.

[@gwishart]

This was first broadcast a few weeks after a former Russian agent and his daughter were poisoned in Salisbury. The two Russian KGB assassins responsible claimed to be in the UK to visit "the famous 123-metre spire of Salisbury Cathedral".

[@TheTradge]

@@gwishart I believe it was the same week, as Mock the Week is a topical programme about the week's news, so is often filmed only a day or two before broadcast.

[@matthewmuli487]

Ahh man I dont get the "steeples joke"

[@gwishart]

This was first broadcast a few weeks after a former Russian agent and his daughter were poisoned in Salisbury. The two Russian KGB assassins responsible claimed to be in the UK to visit "the famous 123-metre spire of Salisbury Cathedral".

[@TheTradge]

Watch the whole episode, this is a callback to the earlier discussion about the Salisbury poisonings, and the Russians who claimed they were there because they wanted to see Salisbury cathedral =)

[@MARTINA-gc3tq]

Nice of Nish to turn up in the end....was he waiting for a script writer to give him a joke?

[@MartinelunafayeWhitear21]

😂😂😂😂😂

[@craig.denham]

Thanos Car

[@bobsyouruncle1069]

OMG, have you seen Thanos' lake?

[@amigaamigo5307]

Artificial

[@SvenTviking]

Nish didn’t mention racism. Is this a first?

[@TheOriginalEwan]

*Who tf is Deirdre*

[@Lord_Skeptic]

The agony aunt

[@DunkdaHunk]

One of the rare times where they get two female comedians that are genuinely really good. You either get one out of 2, or none out of two. Before anyone calls me sexist, I genuinely believe this is due to there being far less female comedians as a whole. Now more are getting rightful recognition we're getting more decent comedians.

[@rachelfox8108]

@@katiejanejohnson696 That's very true. They're mandated by the BBC to ensure one woman is on the panel at a minimum, but beyond that they're free to keep prioritizing men. If they really challenged themselves to add more than two women, they will find more and more good female comedians. But that's not going to happen if the spots for women aren't being made more available.

[@rachelfox8108]

@@jgt_ How can men and women be equally represented on the comedy circuit (as you are demanding me to prove) when there has been a bias in place for decades -- that women "just aren't funny" -- that has led to the people who pick the panels skipping over women to the point that a "one woman per panel minimum" rule was necessary in the first place? It's dumb circular logic on your part, since the very issue of comedy industry sexism means we can't use panel numbers to prove that women are as funny as men, and you'll find that the women who do get through did so because they were funnier than the typical male comedian, and had to be so to break through the bias. Like you said, the women on this panel are funny, and deserve every bit of their spots on that panel. That should be proof that the bias is unfounded -- every woman on these panels has the talent to be there, no question. Addendum: The comedy circuit is just another way that the bias comes through. Women aren't expected to be funny, and it's still a stigma to use the same/similar kinds of material that their male counterparts use, so they very often have to work harder at the bottom to get enough recognition to even be considered for panel shows. Just look at any comments section for an unknown/just-starting-out woman comedian tight five vs unknown/just-starting-out man comedian tight five. Measure the responses and get your data from those.

[@ploppyploppy]

@@rachelfox8108 Could it be that there are more male comedians than female? Nah of course not. That doesn't fit your narrative. That's why some people think there's a gender pay gap when they are just unable to comprehend that different industries are made up of differing amounts of genders.

[@rachelfox8108]

@@ploppyploppy Explain to me *why* there are more professional male comedians than female ones, then. Back up your position. By the by, the gender pay gap is measured by the averages of two people in the same position at the same company, where one is male and the other female. It isn't always 79c to the dollar-- it's often less if the woman is Black, Asian, Latina or Indigenous. If the issue really is about men crowding the higher positions and thus having higher pay, we have to question if there are barriers in place that prevent women from succeeding further than middling positions in the company -- that's another issue entirely, but it isn't about the gender pay gap. And if it is about differing field having differing gender demographics, then do you want to talk about how female-majoroty fields often have exemplary men? Why Michel Kors, Marc Jacobs and Ralph Lauren are the heads of fashion, and not a Miranda Priestley? Why Gordon Ramsay is the greatest chef, and not a Monica Gellar type? (You recognise that I am using fictional character in the female examples -- that's just how little known the female exemplars in female-majority fields are). That's a well-known effect called the Glass Escalator. Do you want to talk about that in good faith, or are you just looking for reasons to say "shut up!", like a five year old?

[@mathieuleader8601]

Hello Aunt Kath my mum has a sister called Kath Newton are you my mums sister please make up with mum

[@baileysmith4744]

why do they keep using the same name

[@sophieasha9069]

Dear Deidre is a famous agony aunt column from The Sun (a newspaper/tabloid from the UK) I guess that was the best they could conjure up in about a minute or so

[@manelbonnet6018]

Fighting strategic envelope crucial tax matter bedroom count beauty.

[@GordonHugenay]

that's rare, a Mock the Week clip with two women and both of them are funny

[@orangegarbage]

What is the name of the woman with the glasses? very funny indeed!

[@GordonHugenay]

@@orangegarbage It's Kerry Godliman. She was in series 7 of Taskmaster (on UKTVplay if you're from the UK, or on KZbin if you're from anywhere else).

[@jaggass]

''I'm think i'm in love with a woman who's 25 stone and i can't stop thinking about her. Would you say it's an infatuation?''

[@davew4998]

Dear Dierdre, I'm a comedian who nobody laughs at because they are all racist. What should I do? Nish Kumar

[@chonglongdong2503]

It's pronounced Deer-dra

[@gwishart]

Maybe in Ireland, however the person they are referencing is June Deidre Sanders, who is English; and therefore her name is pronounced Deer-dree.

[@TheStephrules]

I find that Rachel Parris isn't that funny but I think that Kerry Godliman is really funny

[@peterburke1709]

Rachel's outfit looks ridiculous

[@Lord_Skeptic]

It is avant garde

[@TheHollaata]

who df is Deidre ?

[@romainsavioz5466]

A name for thoses people you write letters to seek advices

[@sweiland75]

Abby's British cousin.

[@NickFieldMedia]

Agony aunt in one of the UK newspapers.

[@daybreakrebornedits]

Dear Deidre, Every time Kerry tries to be funny, I can't stop my eyes from rolling out of orbit. Please tell her to leave. Love, The Human Race.

[@kinsmed]

Dara's laughing, Ed's laughing, the audience is laughing... what's your deal?

[@comicalmaz4432]

She was funny!

[@OldRaver]

IO TG - Kerry is funny. I was at the recording, she is proper funny. The blonde is not funny, was painful to watch at times. Young Ed and Huw are my favourites though. Masters.

[@spicypineapplez9445]

OldRaver1 Hugh

[@beeble2003]

Dear IO TG, Why don't you leave, instead? Nobody is forcing you to watch these videos and you can always go to the next one if there are people you don't find funny.

[@tomcoburn5258]

rachel parris just isn't funny

[@eidothea]

tom coburn You need to watch The Daily Mash, she really comes into her own there

[@TheTradge]

To you maybe, I enjoy her stuff

[@nigelscott4325]

Ed Byrne only gets on because he's Dara's best mate. It can't be because of his talent, because he's got none

[@NateSean]

Blasphemy. You've never seen his special.

[@YorkshireNutte]

I suppose you could do so much better, could you?

[@jameswhiteley6843]

Is this what the vegan, middle-class lefties from Islington call funny?

[@alexinabox6931]

Afternoon, as a non-vegan lower class 'leftie' from Scotland... Pretty funny.

[@kinsmed]

Oh, I'm sure you're hilarious, right?

[@nexgenhippy]

Hugh's one about catching his bollocks in a lift door had me spitting out my coffee

[@fetus_yoda]

Is that your target? Vegan, middle class people from a specific borough in London?

[@jameswhiteley6843]

mrevilevil2 why not? Advertising agencies make stereotypes.