Unlikely lines from a romantic novel | Mock the Week - BBC

Subscribe and 🔔 to the BBC 👉 bit.ly/BBCKZbinSub
Watch the BBC first on iPlayer 👉 bbc.in/iPlayer-Home SUBSCRIBE to the OFFICIAL BBC KZbin channel: bit.ly/2IXqEIn
LAUNCH BBC iPlayer to access Live TV and Box Sets: bbc.in/2J18jYJ
The performers suggest unlikely lines from a romantic novel in Scenes We'd Like to See.
Comedy show combining the best elements of panel show, stand-up and improvised games with two teams of comedians taking a satirical swipe at the news and world events.
Dara O Briain and Hugh Dennis discuss the events of the week in the company of guests Glen Moore, Ed Gamble, Kerry Godliman, Milton Jones and Rachel Parris.
Mock The Week | Series 18 Episode 4 | BBC
#BBC #MockTheWeek
All our TV channels and S4C are available to watch live through BBC iPlayer, although some programmes may not be available to stream online due to rights. If you would like to read more on what types of programmes are available to watch live, check the 'Are all programmes that are broadcast available on BBC iPlayer?' FAQ 👉 bbc.in/2m8ks6v.

[@TheSequelWasBetter]

"The Lighthouse Keeper," the new romantic sensation from Milton Jones.

[@xtheamazingax]

'Our relationship is on the rocks.' In his context here, nothing else needs to be said. Hehe

[@MrUndoe]

I’d read it.

[@barbarajoseph-adam8337]

I’d even get the audiobook if he was the narrator.

[@AlliShaw]

@@barbarajoseph-adam8337 😂😂😂😂

[@lizaspleasure8403]

Brilliant

[@Jacqueline_Hyde]

Romance: *exsists* The lighthouse keeper: I'd rather not

[@shakesfirst2443]

Are people contractually obliged to laugh at him?

[@darkimpulse2829]

I was sort of expecting a different profession for the third one, like bartender

[@JG-vh1xc]

@@darkimpulse2829 that would be very Milton. King of misdirection

[@gordonbotterill9613]

only Milton could make 3 jokes about a lighthouse keeper

[@Blazervitch]

he's a genius

[@rustyant]

I was waiting for one along the lines of "Nobody puts baby in the corner..."

[@lagoondiver]

Must be a trilogy :-D

[@99lodewijk]

Comedy rule of 3

[@rhallam88]

I WOULD buy and read that novel... 😂

[@phunkymind23]

"Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven, Lucifer?!" "Yes, I think my leg's broken." said the lighthouse keeper.

[@brenm6668]

James At even better when you dissect the anatomy of Lucifer- ‘luc (lux) ifer (fer). So, ‘light-bearer

[@issysacristan9128]

@@brenm6668 OH DUDE 😳

[@ireallyreallyhategoogle]

lol

[@trolleyfan]

Now to be known as the "Lighthouse Keeper Trilogy" clip.

[@olerocker3470]

"Was that you exclaiming in ecstasy?" She asked. "No, that was the foghorn." Said the lighthouse keeper.

[@ireallyreallyhategoogle]

lol

[@Richard_Jones]

At first Letitia didn't seem that impressed with the Lighthouse. However, the lighthouse keeper flicked a switch and her face just lit up.

[@MJAY-N7129]

Oh my gosh 🤣🤣🤣

[@XIIIMPC]

The pause after "our relationship is on the rocks" to give the audience a second to figure out where he's going with it and start laughing is some perfect timing.

[@willowsmith7736]

Funniest was definitely the guy with all the lighthouse lines, gotta live the continuity

[@EterPuralis]

That'd be Milton Jones, he primarily does reeeeally offbeat puns.

[@romainsavioz5466]

@@EterPuralis or not

[@EterPuralis]

@@romainsavioz5466 ?

[@JimmyLundberg]

You should hear about his grandfather!

[@romainsavioz5466]

@@JimmyLundberg or his other grandfather

[@arthurgomes5188]

Man, that lighthouse keeper should really try to date someone else

[@Cryscorde]

No one said it was the same woman.

[@swawssfm9760]

when you find out there is not a romantic novel about a lighthouse keeper: reality is often disappointing

[@cariad123]

Oh no there absolutely will be, dude

[@KeithFraser82]

Try this: en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Light_Between_Oceans

[@dgill441]

D Oswald Heist would beg to differ!! 🧐😂

[@austincross3001]

Those lighthouse jokes really brighten up my day.

[@rubywest5166]

I’d rather they brighten up your night, tbh

[@jacobsaxby9468]

If that joke was intentional, well done. If it wasn't, pretend it was!

[@austincross3001]

@@rubywest5166 I know this is nine months late, but I would be delighted if you would brighten up my night.

[@austincross3001]

@@jacobsaxby9468 it was TOTALLY intentional.

[@MJAY-N7129]

🤣🤣🤣

[@demonkingak1755]

that lucifer line had me dying.

[@JamesFan1991]

"I feel like our relationship keeps going around and around." "I'm not surprised," said the Lighthouse Keeper.

[@AutomaticDuck300]

"I want to make you mine", he said. "Yes, of course!" she said happily. "Great", he said, "Here's a pickaxe and one of those helmets with a light on the front."

[@TheNukedNacho]

Said the lighthouse keeper

[@TheNukedNacho]

That trilogy was a wild ride. Thankfully, the boat trip wasn't, thanks to the Lighthouse Keeper.

[@frankdelnoij938]

Milton was great and Kerri superb. Her delivery is perfect.

[@tanukiman3855]

Milton hits the trifecta!

[@Vincornelis]

You leave me breathless said the Asthma patient.

[@101Draico]

“I’ll get you an inhaler” said the lighthouse keeper

[@davidharris2517]

11 dislikes are from lighthouse owners

[@farje1]

Or their girlfriends.

[@Potato-qv6hq]

not a huge fan of romance but i'd read the light house saga day 1.

[@laishenly1124]

Rewatching this just to listen to Milton's "The Lighthouse Keeper". Classic :)

[@lizaspleasure8403]

SHES A DOUBLE 38G BARBARA WERE GONNA NEED THE MEGA CUPS

[@pritamdebnath5656]

Milton "The Lighthouse Keeper" Jones 😂😂😂

[@barbarajoseph-adam8337]

His shirt was theme-appropriate too, I just realised.

[@addicted2gaz]

I bloody love Milton Jones

[@Brownalebelly]

I love Kerry Godliman, the funniest woman alive and so adorable

[@barbarajoseph-adam8337]

I still laugh at her detective joke, the shot to the eye one. I must’ve watched that clip 6 million times now, still gets a cackle out of me.

[@salemsaberhagen1570]

I want to read "The Lighthouse Keeper" now

[@KeithFraser82]

en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Light_Between_Oceans

[@Tildybean42]

The Lucifer one would work on me tbh

[@icarrotbooks9688]

Same

[@ConstantChaos1]

I would propose on the spot Hell a dude said my makeup looked tim burton-y and his contact in my phone was switched to "potential bf?"

[@alanburge2725]

There is some comedic gold here from everybody but we all want more of the lighthouse keeper

[@RIXRADvidz]

LOVE'S BEACON ; the Lighthouse Keeper's story

[@ireallyreallyhategoogle]

+

[@Master_Petes_Theater]

This is gold! And Milton ALWAYS makes me laugh! Thank you for sharing and here's hoping you post more scenes from MtW! 😂👍

[@Adam-nb6im]

Thank you for taking the hints and no longer putting emojis in the titles...

[@tasharch]

"I feel like, whenever I meet you, we end up going round and round in the same old circles," she said to the Lighthouse Keeper. The drama and the tragedy!

[@kinsmed]

Very gratifying to see Kerry nail it down here.

[@flyawaytodie]

Ed's "bandage" joke would be a better series of films than 50 Shades of Grey!

[@RIXRADvidz]

lo, the saga of the Lighthouse Keepers Loves.....always a stormy tome that ends as most rocky romances will go.

[@stratobungle]

Absolutely top-notch clip, everyone was in particularly fine form - especially Kerry and Milton!

[@SuperLordpig]

Team RRC2 really? I thought only Hugh and Milton were funny.

[@Charliefarley170287]

Kerry's one about hair really got me! 😂

[@stratobungle]

@@SuperLordpig humour is highly subjective, all that matters is that you got a laugh from someone to brighten your day...😀

[@jakamneziak]

did the lighthouse keeper start the lighthouse family?

[@padstowphantom]

Socks on. Like a true professional.

[@mkk2424]

Sometimes coming late to the game is the best - I have been hooked on watching these videos for a week now and still finding more!

[@blowfishes]

Cheer up luv... might never 'appen! Absolutely adore Rachel Parris ❤

[@arwahsapi]

Plot twist: Lucifer, the light bearer, was a lighthouse keeper. He fell.

[@Rachel-fi4sc]

He fell... from the top of the lighthouse!

[@TonyHavenMusic]

I love how Milton creates a whole world in a character

[@Tryo707]

Only Milton can somehow manage a call back in these scenes. Truly brilliant.

[@slendersera]

Lighthouse keepers need love too

[@KeithFraser82]

en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Light_Between_Oceans

[@SaintPhoenixx]

They all fall for E.A.R.L. in the end.

[@cassidyho939]

Just leave a light on for me ;)

[@shamaliwije4872]

I’m rather invested in the Lighthouse Keeper’s story now...

[@edwardkinsey5680]

Lighthouse Keeper should become a movie

[@KeithFraser82]

en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Light_Between_Oceans

[@Darkeklaw]

No I want a romance novel about a lighthouse keeper.

[@marcelmoreau2733]

Our relationship is on rocky ground, said the geologist.

[@haythamfaisal8113]

I demand a melodramatic novella. The sailer, The Pirate....And The Light House Keeper!

[@elliot2331]

I would read the whole story of this lighthouse keeper.

[@beeble2003]

I hear it's quite a tall tale.

[@Robotboy8486]

I actually went to see Milton Jones live, it was great!

[@stevensallsorts]

Your house stinks, well somebody had to tell him

[@alanburge4798]

Great show with great comedians but the light house joke is a winner surely ?

[@101Draico]

“you think these comments are addicted to one joke?” Said KZbin monitors “I don’t think so.” Said the lighthouse keeper

[@HopSkipLimp]

Oh Milton!! 😂

[@Agnethatheredhairkid]

The best one of these I've ever seen.

[@TriploGoofus]

Yayyy Rachel Parris!!! I love her so much

[@prestok]

Was or just me or did she have a speech impediment that she didn't use to have? Something sounded different. Still amazing jokes, though

[@TriploGoofus]

@@prestok maybe? I thought she was just doing different accents though

[@____4bon4____]

Its the lighthouse keeper for me 😂😂

[@tasharch]

I so want to read the Lighthouse Sagas. Brilliant.

[@farje1]

Milton is simply brilliant.

[@alanburge2725]

I think they are all bloody funny. Honourable mention to Milton Jones though.

[@Milkydrummer]

That opening joke is great 😂

[@rodrigogallegos2530]

Our relationship is on the rocks, she said. I knew I shouldn’t have turned the light off, said the lighthouse keeper

[@timemmons1911]

Fury raged inside her like the storm that lashed at e windows. "How can you leave me like this?" She screamed. "I must check the on the light..."

[@laur83]

these were literally all golden

[@hazeltree7738]

Especially the lighthouse ones.

[@butterflyinparadise]

That‘s so good!!

[@janemazurek2517]

Love the lighthouse keeper

[@joewilliams2944]

Milton Jones absolutely wipes the floor with all of them in this round.

[@TheFreeThinkingMan]

Surprised Milton finished the last joke, he really didn't need to...

[@musmus-culus]

Lighthouse jokes aside I really liked Hugh's B- joke

[@Lord_Skeptic]

Coming soon the new romantic novel by Milton Jones. The lighthouse keeper.

[@hmak5423]

I'm the lighthouse keeper.

[@Damian_1989]

Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven, *LuCiFeR?!?!?!*

[@tyrahartman7922]

Lighthouse keeper 😫

[@ReflectionTool637]

Kerry G. is the best !!

[@figplucker908]

Milton is on another level entirely. 🤣

[@JulesColour]

Who else got the reference "I wish I knew how to quit you"

[@Calllum]

Why do you only upload one of the scenes we like to see and not two

[@abelisraelcruzayuso4682]

Kerri is great

[@kjamison5951]

Him: “I’ve bought you a cute two-piece outfit to wear, go on, get naked and try it on.” Her: “It’s a pair of slippers!”

[@LouseGrouse]

*_LUCIFER?!!_* Brill

[@mnomadvfx]

I just about fell over at that one!

[@barbarajoseph-adam8337]

Glenn is always brilliant, I especially adore his tongue twisters.

[@JackFitzsimmonsZondaFan]

Oscar Pistorious was with his new girlfriend, she was in the bathroom, "Do you mind if I ask you something?" she said, "No" replied Oscar "Shoot".

[@louiso.4325]

Nice callback(s), Milton!

[@Tiger516funny]

Said the lighthouse keeper.

[@lamon4079]

I thought you where into bandange.hahahahaaaha

[@TomFynn]

"Our relationship is on the rocks" she said. "Without scotch I wouldn't be in a relationship with you" said he.

[@jakamneziak]

Is it butterflies in your stomach dear? 'No it's probably bats' said Ozzy Osbourne

[@doctorleak5312]

I'm very interested in this lighthouse keepers love story wonder if there is a book I could buy?

[@JG-vh1xc]

*plays **1:55** over and over again* it’s free serotonin

[@moth4591]

3.17 Those are his business socks

[@sjtimmer7]

Is there a compilation of Milton Jones' continuation jokes? The lighthousekeeper springs to mind, but there must be more series of jokes...

[@beeble2003]

There are his unlikely movie trailers for sequels (ones where the number 2 stands for the syllable "too").

[@ankledsquid]

We need more lighthouse keeper jokes

[@kennyn1992]

Hoping the new applicant maid would bring him the kind of love he sought he called her to arrange an interview. "Are you, by any chance, plump and buxom?" he asked, quivering. "No," said the light housekeeper.

[@mansouralsubaie9175]

This is gold

[@lokephoenix1039]

How is it that Rachel Parris has the EXACT same mannerisms as Brian Cox and it’s taken me this long to figure out they’re the same person?!

[@manuelcapela7620]

I wonder how many lighthouse keepers does it take to change a lightbulb? 🤔

[@peter-johndamonse5035]

5 years later Milton wins me over in 5 minutes...😐

[@asmartistenthusiast3469]

0:42 😂

[@WM-wh3hm]

Yay!! I saw this live!!! ROFL🤣

[@robleary3353]

Bril!