Unwritten rules in the US (Why nobody talks about them??)

Thank you for your video, Marina. I've been through similar cultural shocks living in Brazil (I'm from Argentina). Here small talks and people smiling all the time is the rule too. But it's interesting the way you approach the situation, instead of saying "they are false", you say "they want to establish a friendly environment", that's a nice way to see it.

[@sihembouaoud8226]

i liked the quality of small talk it's so sweet and make the client confortable i think it's so important especially in this stressful life

[@kw7709]

Hi Marina, as an American, it's so interesting to hear you talk about things that are so seemingly normal, being highlighted as a cultural phenomenon. Regarding parties, I agree with others who say that being late depends on the people and the region. It can be very rude to be late, especially if your invitation states that dinner will be served at a specific time. And never be late for work! Anyway, thanks for sharing your insights!

[@Maya_CR-42]

My gosh!!... Really agree with you ...I need small favour from you ..will you?

[@yoda2397]

as cultural phenomena*. Unless the change in plurality was intentional, in which case that's another grammatical error. "As an American.." interesting

[@kw7709]

@@yoda2397 I'm not a grammar expert, but I'm pretty sure that using the singular here is correct because "things" is a collective noun.

[@DAILYNEWSWITHSUBTITLES]

Yes

[@yoda2397]

@@kw7709 Interesting, given that you correctly chose "are". These things aren't that complicated. Or, in your opinion, these things isn't that complicated. Embarrassing.

[@sitbone3]

Distance between people in line is not a Covid behavior. There is something called “personal space” that is different in European countries than in the U.S. In most European countries the personal space between people in public is closer than the personal space in the U.S. Whether in conversation or just standing and waiting. Europeans will stand very close and that makes Americans a little nervous and they’ll tend to back away and enlarged the personal space. (A study I had to do for my sociology degree.)

[@Kelebek-jj]

Yes exactly this is not a covid behaviour. I'm from europe and when i moved here this was the first weird thing for me that people feel disturbed when you stand close to them. For them this is normal but for us this is so unfriendly and such a being cold person. I think the reason is; people feel in danger, because of the safety problems here.

[@sitbone3]

@@Kelebek-jj …not really anything to do with current safety problems. The American personal space comfort zone has been like this for at least 75 years. It has changed over time. When my grandparents came to the US from Italy and Lithuania around 1900, people stood much closer. Over the decades the distance has become enlarged.

[@Kelebek-jj]

@@sitbone3 Yes maybe you are right. I am almost new in this country.I have been observing people and the culture since I came here.There are many things to discuss and the I wish I could explain correctly but I am not a native speaker and this topic is so deep😁 Maybe I can explain my thoughts better, another time in the future😊

[@mrDingleberry44]

@@Kelebek-jj No, not a safety issue. Regardless of my being in a good or bad neighborhood, Americans just tend to like space. We don't want to smell our neighbor or be able to tell what you had for lunch. I've been abroad a lot too. I'm not particularly afraid of European or Asians being really close. But I also look like maybe I have a screw loose, so most times I get my personal space even abroad. 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@jessicafregoso6894]

But still we can get sick 😷 we are not going to die but getting sick sucks 🤪

[@deplorablenation111]

You were spot on with everything. It's a rarity to see an individual get it so correctly.

[@khuba2500]

Being late is not chill, it's simply disrespectful

[@Viallanelle-Martinez]

In your page, we don't just learn language, we also learn culture and other things 💗🙂

[@sitbone3]

Wait until you go to Mexico. If you make plans to meet locals at a restaurant at 7pm, they will arrive at 10pm. If you plan with locals to meet for breakfast at 9am, they will arrive at noon. It’s a Mexican thing. Then when you ask them why they came so late they will answer, “well, here we are”.

[@fatimahira9578]

That's kindof annoying isn't it?

[@essammortada4903]

Same in egypt

[@essammortada4903]

@TONIK This is our culture in Egypt

[@silas4819]

I appreciate your daily effort for us to improve our English significantly! KEEP UP THE GREAT WORK

[@dangelusarussianchannel]

Always getting some great ideas from you! Thank you

[@naniski7388]

i am following you from algeria huge respect for your effort to help us to improve our english language

[@anthropomorphicrabbit866]

I think the punctuality thing depends on what region of America you’re in. In the northern south (that’s what I like to call it), my dad always taught me that to be early is to be on time and to be on time is to be late. If you arrive early to a social gathering, as long as you’re not putting pressure on the host, you can always help set up. California is definitely bizarre if the next guest at that party didn’t show up until an hour after the agreed upon time.

[@hmm7420]

Different cultures in the USA have different values about time. In my family, there is a saying, "If you are not 10 minutes early, you are late." A few of my extended family change it to 15 or more minutes early. I went to a family dinner, arrived 15 minutes early, and the rest of the family was eating dessert. They told me, "We tried to wait for you, but when you were so late, we gave up and ate without you." My parents went to a party hosted by a Costa Rican family one time. They were warned about arriving on time by another American friend. So they arrived an hour late, and the hostess was still in her housecoat. She was shocked that they were so early.

[@EmpressMermaid]

I live in an area with a large Latin-American population. They actually have different time concepts for different situations. It's a bit of a joke. If you say 6 o'clock "hora Americana" you mean really 6 o'clock. They also have the idea of "work time", as times regarding work or business have to be on time.

[@arturom7903]

Everytime that you realease a video I learn so much new topics. Thanks so much, Marina. 🙂

[@thefulchman]

That "ramp" on the side of the road is called the "shoulder." And it would require an extreme emergency to allow you to drive on it. It's definitely not there for people to get around a traffic jam. That will piss a lot of people off.

[@yonaokami3447]

Thanks for this video😍🤩

[@juju33879]

Живу во Франции 20 лет, в общем, почти все похоже. Кроме того, что приходить намного позже назначенного времени - это ну чудовищный моветон )) Таких людей потом больше просто не пригласят )) Есть регионы ( юго-восток ), где это более-менее нормально, но в основном люди очень пунктуальны. Спасибо, люблю твои видео! ;)

[@elenaegikova2477]

Ой, а я думала, что французы тоже расслабленные относительно времени)

[@juju33879]

@@elenaegikova2477 Смотря в каком регионе :) На юго-востоке очень расслабленные, на юго-западе или ближе к Германии, например - очень пунктуальные.

[@vladarskopin3314]

Thank you for the video. I had no idea they have so many unspoken rules in the US, that's pretty interesting

[@romancherevatenko5658]

Interesting! Marina, thank you! I hope to see more stories about unwritten rules in the US.

[@thefairycupid098]

Hello Marina Thanks for your daily picks and healthy content

[@astrojello6882]

I think you gotta know the U.S. varies a ton state by state. In a lot of places 4pm means 4pm.

[@KatieG986]

Exactly!

[@HA-zd5gx]

I like 4 pms that are actualy 5pm!

[@leslievalenciano-lopez8887]

I agree. Personally I think it’s rude to be late and if the event starts at 4, people should be there at 4!❤️

[@KatieG986]

@@leslievalenciano-lopez8887 is true.

[@leslievalenciano-lopez8887]

@Eccentric Queen I agree

[@alenabazhukova]

Когда была в Японии, меня поразило то, как люди поднимаются и спускаются по лестнице, идут по тротуарам... Это просто как будто врожденный инстинкт, люди идут по правой стороне. Если это эскалатор, то люди все равно стоят справа, давая возможность пройти тем, кому не терпится спуститься... Если это туалет, то люди спокойно стоят в очереди. Если очередь в магазине - то оставляют большое расстояние между друг другом. Просто уважение к окружающим, как же мне его не хватает в России. Везде тебя пихают, толкают, фу

[@real.siberian]

А ещё, никто не может нормально с позитивом или нейтрально высказать что-то, что не нравится. Обязательно начнут хамить

[@irina-s]

Ну не надо обобщать, в России достаточно вежливых людей. Страна большая и люди разные, я уже не говорю, что у нас много национальностей со своей культурой.

[@marinabakay9932]

It's SOOO untrue on East Coast! 4pm means 4pm! Don't say US, specify your state.

[@journeytoamericanenglish4952]

Hi marina I am from Pakistan🇵🇰 I like your lecture but you are looking so much real American.

[@rajkeplerhume5002]

What the hell is that supposed to mean?

[@Shekhar_pro]

Although, she is Russian 😅😅

[@rajkeplerhume5002]

@@Shekhar_pro I don't even know what he wanted to say. Is it a crime if someone "looks" a bit American? 😂

[@journeytoamericanenglish4952]

No it is not a crime.

[@rajkeplerhume5002]

@@journeytoamericanenglish4952 then you shouldn't have said that. It's not polite.

[@tharii314]

Love you!

[@analuizamp]

Marina, here in Brazil when we say a party start at 7:00 p.m. people usually arrives at 9:00 p.m.. For foreigners this maybe can stress a little bit, until get used to it.

[@angel_1408]

Hi ! Marina,I like your channel so much!✨ Because your channel is so interesting and healthy!💫

[@БарановськаАнастасія]

Як завжди ДУЖЕ цікаве та корисне відео. Дякую за ваші старання 🥰

[@nesoo7868]

Very helpful channel & Marina is Best English teacher. Your pronusation is so clear. Anyone can easily understand what you teach. Thank uuu😘

[@WhatashameMaryJane]

I am European (Italian) living in USA (New York) and to me arriving at least 15-30 minutes after the time is considered common practice. In New York instead I had to learn to be exactly on time because it's rude to arrive "late" to a party. So the exact opposite as what you perceive as "European" or "American" 🤷‍♀😊

[@volodymyrostrovskyi533]

Regarding righ-side walking, I'm not sure it's alway an unwritten rule. For example, in Ukraine, it's written in Traffic Rulles that not only drivers, but also pedestrians must use the right side. Maybe it's in also in Traffic rules of other Europenian countries

[@lifeinamerica.veronika3341]

Марина , спасибо за Ваше видео 😊У меня в Америке немного другой эксперимент со временем на ужин-вечеринку . Если пригласили быть в 5 то необходимо быть вовремя . А , в остальном всё похоже на Ваши описания 🌹🌹🌹

[@dariarova9724]

Качество видео на высоте. Я не только содержании. Реально отличная камера 👍

[@taniavoltios9167]

I am a Bolivian and moved to LA in 2020. I find it interesting that you say people in the U.S. don't arrive on time to gatherings, cause actually I feel it's the opposite (specially compared to my country in which it is common to arrive 1 or 2 hours after the time of the invitation). Nice video!

[@MA-gn5nl]

Every “American” thing really depends on where in the US you live and your cultural background. America is so diverse there’s really no way that one “American” thing applies to all Americans. Here in Hawaii it’s normal to be super late to gatherings and meet ups that we even have a term coined for it which is “Hawaii time.” My family always say “eh I not late, I’m on Hawaii time” lol Interestingly in Okinawa, they also have the term “Okinawa time” which means the same thing. It was very interesting because Japan’s known for being super on time. Comes to show that Okinawans are not the same as the Japanese

[@MrMojeju]

Same in Habesha culture (Ethiopian)they arrive 3hr late.

[@DAILYNEWSWITHSUBTITLES]

Yes

[@ygabriella8991]

Same, I'm from México

[@angelicaelias182]

Tal vez es algo muy latino nuestro, a mi también me llamó la atención esa parte. En México decimos “llegaste a barrer” si lo hiciste antes de la hora acordada o bien se vuelve incómodo jaja.

[@ana_maria9946]

thank u for all marina! I adore the quality of your videos

[@futreporto742]

Thank you Marina!

[@hajaramiri8748]

Way too useful..thx

[@arinstars2542]

I enjoyed in this vid and I like their culture.

[@HealerSoul44]

I have loved this video ! Thanks for the tip !

[@jamshid_6682]

Hi! Marina Thank you for the video

[@pastorammo]

I think the “showing up whenever” thing is local to you. That’s not normal American culture.

[@rmh8940]

It's pretty common

[@mariorosas7779]

Because she lives in socal

[@joshuagenes]

I tend to show up on time if not earlier in order to help out if needed. Often you show up and people aren't ready on time if you come a little later then you know you are showing up when there are going to be other people. Americans tend to leave at 8 or 9 pm and that is when the Latinoes show up and they leave at 2 or 3 am when you have a party.

[@Ankita1707]

I like your videos you are so amazing

[@JohnSmith-xh7gb]

You're always fanatic.

[@thecoachwhocares]

Thanks for this video.😊 I hope I’ll visit the States one day.🤞

[@bethanykennedy812]

In these types of videos, people say in the U.S. and proceed to say things that are not true about the entire U.S. I think that there's an assumption that because we are one country, we are one culture. And while there are things that are universal to the whole country, most things vary by state, region, county, or town. And then of course you have subcultures with their own rules based on the origin country of their ancestors, or some other factor common in the group but not common in the country.

[@boomboombaby9140]

Yeah the US have 4 different time zone , entertaining another state sometimes is like going to another country

[@esharahman7702]

Hi I followed you from Bangladesh which is a small country of south Asia.Lots of love... for your future upcoming videos.💗💗

[@beingkidslibrarytoysgamesb9646]

I realized this really long ago that I was born in India by some geographical error. .. the queue , the distance when in queue, keeping on right, arriving late for parties (but I cook really before time), no pics with random people esp of kids, less post on insta post n other social sites...quick small talk etc!

[@heddadchrifa7625]

Every day I watch your videos. Yo're so amazing and I adore especially the way you talk and your mouvements. Whenever I listen to you. I feel more self confident and able to use my feedback that is held in my mind. I HOPE YOU ALL THE BEST. ❤️❤️

[@pamela81791]

I live in California, always start party on time, they have the time on the invitación card 3-6 , 4-7,. I learn you need to text everyone one week before the party, make sure how much people the come, I didn’t know until I have my daughter party and only 2 kids show up,it was very disappointed but I learn on the hard way

[@silent..6044]

Ну конечно просто отлично:) 💫🧡 каждый раз смотрю и говорю просто идти вперёд к своей цели, вот это клаcно:) Thank you✍

[@jelenadakovic7629]

In Europe, yes is different but it depends from which country. In the North people are more punctual instead the people from the south of Europe are more likely to be late.

[@farhanmobin518]

Hey Marina, that was really informative! Thanks. :)

[@shahodatjumaniyozova5540]

Super understandable

[@chuchu5923]

In my country I often come to home hangouts with friends only 10-30 minutes late, but they tell me that I am constantly late

[@millionaire6341]

I love you and I love your lessons 😻 from Yemen

[@nethmafernando8986]

Interesting 😁pretty cool. I'm from Sri Lanka😀. I knew lot of new things about US 🙃. Love to visit some day 😋. Thank you Marina🤩

[@youdeservethis]

Show up whenever for a party, but for a dinner party show up on time.

[@safraneloq8524]

Thank you for this video, it is super cool that you have noticed about maintaining physical distance. I will subscribe to your channel!

[@awgustbaird]

Born and raised in California 😊 generally speaking arriving to a party at someone's home, between 15 to 30 minutes late is considered normal. Guests usually arriving before dinner would begin to mingle, enjoy drinks, appetizers, and casually chat. This allows for most people to show up, and the host to begin/wrap-up cooking. Often a host will state time dinner to be served so everyone is sure to arrive on time. If you arrive early, just ask how you can help 😊 With that said, I have been at parties where cooking started very late... guests were not happy. Kids were hungry and adults were annoyed 😒 My daughter said to mention, no one wants to be the first person to arrive. Not really sure why that is... but there is truth in that. Don't want to look too eager I guess 🤣 So showing up a "little" late prevents that from occurring 🤷🏼‍♀️ but still, less than an hour 😊 Now being late to any type of meeting... 😏 even if it's just coffee with a friend, always be on time. You mentioned Los Altos California. This is a more affluent area, as you know, and maybe culturally their time is more fluid, or flexible... also going back to it "looking" cool to be fashionably late, may be more a thing in casual parties there 🤔

[@lisasmartway]

It's so interesting that some things that are super polite in the US may be the opposite in some other countries 😉

[@barrysteven5964]

You asked if we walk on the left in the UK. I'm not a hundred percent sure. I'm not sure there is a hard and fast rule but in schools children are often told to walk on the left in the corridor. On the London underground there is a rule on the escalators both going up and down. Stand on the right! Leave the left clear for people who want to walk (or run) past everyone if they are in a rush.

[@VALaker100]

It's only common in certain parts of the country, usually big cities. If you are throwing a party in the countryside, expect people arrive 10 minutes earlier! Trust me!

[@jamesconnolly5164]

Walking on the right to make foot traffic go smoothly seems like just common sense. I guess it doesn't matter if it's the left or right as long as everyone agrees which side they're using.

[@amandeepsharma6611]

Thank you Mam for making this informative video about USA 🇺🇸

[@emadalsalih2944]

I love you 😘 thank you for everything 💝

[@hkharis07]

Well in my experience Americans are always on time, they will ask the full plan and if you say we want you to be there at 7pm they will be there right at that time. Thanks for sharing informative social observation

[@essammortada4903]

We in Egypt are the exact opposite If you agreed with someone to meet at 2 and you called him, he will tell you I am coming while he is still wearing

[@-.a9942]

Yeah it may depend on the area. Here in northeast America people are always on time.

[@gudetamaminiso513]

Interesting. Except social media+small talk+smile, as a french I find myself exactly like the americans !

[@alexalex-r8o]

I'm so happy I don't live in California 😅 great tips, though. I've lived in the US for over 5 years and I've noticed the same cultural differences too.

[@amitshah9496]

What is the best time to watch Marina's videos, Because then I just keep watching her videos and forget about my studies.

[@amitshah9496]

??any suggestions

[@xyz0_oZYX]

Hi marina, thanks for providing this.I love your videos. They are very interesting

[@dayashanker3481]

Army??

[@xyz0_oZYX]

@@dayashanker3481 yup bts army

[@rasoiiplanet2646]

Watching you is a healthy treat for me!!!😍😍

[@denise1019]

I'm from Germany but I visited the US for some holiday trips. The thing with the small talk is totally weird for me. I don't want to talk with the cashier about trivialities... Moreover, I find that Americans are not only constantly smiling, but also loud and over-excited. 🤪Sorry guys, but you have a beautiful country.

[@tinosnoemi16]

Been following you Marina from Philippines. ❤️ I learned several ideas in terms of communication.

[@YouTubeLife190]

Thank for your facts talk

[@jennyhammond9261]

Where in the US are/were you?? I'm American and it seems very rude to come to dinner more than a few minutes late. Only if something says "open house" do you kinda come and go as you please within the time frame.

[@jennyhammond9261]

Oh, you said later..CA

[@flower5396]

Nice video. 👍

[@roxxxydubois]

Never really heard the never be on time thing, but the rest are spot on though, maybe the on time thing is a california thing.

[@eyasdjunaidi]

Very nice .. thank you for the information… I am from Jordan in the Middle East… I travel to USA all the time … all what you said makes sense to me now … different cultures

[@essammortada4903]

لو سمحت كيف اصبحت تتكلم بطلاقه اخوك من مصر

[@ellen6159]

You are amazing 🤩

[@sandeeppanwarsingh]

Mam you make every video very thoughtfully, if you do not like it, then obviously no one will like it, believe in you, what you know is the best for us... Thanks mam🙏

[@StarOnTheWater]

I live in Germany which is considered one of the most punctual places on earth. But when we say "The party starts at 6" it still means "come whenever the **** you want".

[@lorrainevitoria2131]

In Brazil we always like always guys ask the children mother if we can give a candy for example kids always cry when something happens so to make a kid to stop crying we offer a candy

[@NifaAisya21]

I completly like your videos ma'am🥰

[@alessiafaggian999]

If a friend of mine, 2h after the invitation is still not showing up.... I will start thinking to call the hospital looking for him\her

[@arutkural]

I have a couple of doubts in reported speech. How to report the following sentences: 1. While I was reading newspaper, my wife was preparing breakfast. 2. While my wife was preparing breakfast, someone knocked at the door. Second doubt: Do the following sentences mean the same? A. While my wife was preparing breakfast, someone knocked at the door. B. My wife was preparing breakfast when someone knocked at the door. Requesting you to help me, solving these.

[@ozodbekhakimov6597]

Congratulation😇😁

[@jaeminyy]

at 2:18, how did you know that the person was a tourist? did you ask the person to delete the photo? or tell the person that you should not do that in the US? // In which country people let others to use the ramp to get head of the traffic? // Small talk: do you know which country, small talk is not very common?

[@olkodolko]

Is there self counter or like Amazon store. No small talk there right?

[@ritastein9173]

The first is really surprising because as a Brazilian I always knew americans were super on time, always, and made fun of Brazilians for being always late.

[@fatimataia]

Thnks u r the best

[@Leo-nt2kj]

Hello Marina, I have something to ask you. Is it ok to say American accent in England?

[@imfirstatachaijr.johnner4240]

What does it mean when people say “ I will be riding shotgun “ I have no idea at all.

[@johnhaller5851]

It's the front passenger seat. If you were ever chasing a criminal, the person with the shotgun sits there, not that one would ever see that in real life. But, if more than two people are getting in a car, sometimes someone will say shotgun to establish their position in the front seat, so they don't have to sit in the back.

[@imfirstatachaijr.johnner4240]

@@johnhaller5851 Oh !! Make sense! Thank you for your answer Sir. Appreciated it. I’m not quite good at ENG. thanks again 👏🏻👍🏼

[@sujalnakwalarts]

Part 2, Please 😄😄😄

[@saccavlogs2024]

Hi teacher marina Iam from Kenya 🇰🇪 and I like your explanation please continue and I got many english lesson from your channel thank you

[@mr.donatello]

Showing up late to parties is mostly a West Coast/California thing. East Coast/New York is more punctual.

[@RZOE938]

This is so useful thank you 💗💗

[@spetz911]

В очередях постоянно народ наступает на пятки, так что когда я поднимаю рюкзак или делаю шаг назад - постоянно попадаю им по лицу или по ноге. Ужасно раздражает…

[@adanguevara5157]

Your voice and accent remember me to Michelle from American Pie

[@mummy_kitchen_015]

Thankyou for wonderful knowledge ❤️❤️❤️

[@gulyoraabdumutalova6702]

I adore you Marina 😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘 thanks for all your information