Victor Lustig and Binary Points: Citation Needed 4x05

Last in this season! Today we're off to France for a tale of the world's greatest conman, the Eiffel Tower, and some easy points.
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Thanks again to our anonymous subtitler, and all the people who've helped translate last week's episode!
TOM is at tomscott.com or @tomscott on Twitter
MATT is at mattg.co.uk or @unnamedculprit
GARY is @garybrannan on Twitter
and CHRIS doesn't do this social media nonsense.

[@timothymclean]

"The last name is just a French word you might learn in school...something you might eat with chips." "Frites." Ah, yes, that famous English dish, chips and chips.

[@gwenynorisu6883]

And spam.

[@awmperry]

That’s what we in Scotland call “a chip supper”. My favourite. :-D

[@danielchong5032]

Chips and Chips: British chips and American chips? Get me some of that!

[@Dog1818YT]

Daniel Chong you mean chips and crisps

[@danielchong5032]

@@Dog1818YT That was the joke.

[@peetey897]

"Je Suis Andrew Swimming Pool" I spit halfway across my kitchen.

[@entropiCCycles]

+peetey897 And I was reminded of "Raymond Luxury Yacht" from Monty Python.

[@crystals-r2551]

And i though of life of pi

[@lawrencecalablaster568]

It’s the funniest thing

[@Alfa-deer]

It has me grinning to myself on the bus

[@ShaunCheah]

I was feeling (almost?) depressed for almost a month and binging Citation Needed episodes really helped me get through a lot of days. Today I am feeling less (or maybe even not?) depressed but it is nice to have a Citation Needed anyway; it is a friendly fun way to pass the time and feel less lonely. Thanks to all the people for making this; I don't know why I wrote this comment but here it is anyway.

[@bl4cksp1d3r]

I hope, 5 years later, you still do fine compared to the global situation :3

[@meetaverma8372]

Oh I went through the same, they've been really helpful

[@theneekofficial8829]

Same but with Anxiety instead of depression. made me laugh and distracted me through it all. watched the entire thing like 10 times

[@adamboy7777]

If you're reading this, you've probably been binge watching the Citation Needed. It's okay friend, I'm on the same journey as you.

[@lauraireson6358]

It feels like I’m always on this journey.

[@thelastcube.]

Hello Mr prophet

[@CaterinaMastrogiacomo]

Yay

[@woodfur00]

_Wrong._ I've just _started_ binge watching Citation Needed.

[@DavidWillanski]

I was listening while doing the ironing

[@Armadeus]

to be fair, piscine aside, i can imagine chris saying "je suis Andrew Fish" and it'd still be hilarious

[@gnyrinn]

These shows are a goldmine for band names. Victor Lustig and the Gullible Scrappies, Cello Scrotum and the Fantastic Deviants, etc.

[@oz_jones]

gnyrinn furious strumpets

[@EmmaLiza]

@@oz_jones This one is called "Behind the Flap."

[@TheHorseOutside]

Binary Points is an amazing indie album title

[@JSSMVCJR2.1]

*Johnny and The Fantastic Deviants.

[@radioanon4535]

Cello Scrotum and the Fantastic Deviants is definitely a punk band from Seattle

[@PandoraSystem]

I just realized Victor Lustig is the real-world basis of Moist van Lipwig from Discworld.

[@DataStorm1]

@15:24 "I've been Tom Scot and... " He's no longer Tom Scot? who's he now? Oh, Victor Lustig.....

[@richardmillhousenixon]

Tom Scott, also known as Victor Lustig, also known as Andre Piscine

[@jamesgodden3]

5:40 7 years later and i'm Still annoyed they didn't make a 'somethings fishy' joke

[@Liliou]

As a french, hearing you all saying random french words to find the last name with your cute little accent was quite hilarious!! 😂

[@IceMetalPunk]

I mean, what kind of last name is "Fish" anyway? :P

[@Liliou]

haha true! :P

[@amyclarke6176]

IceMetalPunk I work with someone with the last name fish

[@route2070]

As an American who doesn't speak French I found this hilarious.

[@louyspoisson7220]

i am offended

[@gorgolyt]

how has nobody made a film about this guy yet?

[@kearygallagher]

they prolyl did

[@notthere83]

The fact that the guy was too embarrassed to admit it for some reason reminded me of when I reported someone who scammed me on eBay to the police. Because I wasn't embarrassed about it. However, the policeman laughed and said "Weeell, why would you buy something on the internet?!". (This happened in 1999...)

[@TheGlitchGuild]

My favourite episode ever, just because of "Piscine!"

[@TheSmegPod]

I want to see a "Catch Me If You Can" style movie about this guy now directed by the Coen brothers

[@IsaBella-ir4rf]

Yes

[@hielispace]

I think rewatch this series every 6 months

[@essengeebee]

Je voudrais une piscine et des frites, s'il vous plaît.

[@MarcelRobitaille]

do you want pool noodles & cheese with that?

[@trinitygod863]

+Marcel Robitaille Que-ce que vous piscine (noodels) et des fromage avec ce (sry for my bad french)

[@ilexdiapason]

Chris God "what you swimming pool and multiple cheese with it"

[@uekishurei2006]

I think it's something like "Voudrais-tu une nouille piscine et fromage avec ça?" (learning French here)

[@sub2willne52]

I like a pool and chips please

[@creakyboards8517]

The idea of someone having "professional git" on their death certificate just kills me.

[@adammullarkey4996]

"$51k worth of counterfeit money." Well, why didn't he just sell the counterfeit money at it's actual cost? Seems like an easy way to get $51k to me...

[@oz_jones]

That might have been the plan, but he didn't get the chance

[@farmerboy916]

Adam Mullarkey That's money laundering, yes. You just use the money normally and buy stuff so that it enters into circulation

[@AlexanderNash]

@@farmerboy916 Using counterfeit money is not what money laundering is. Money laundering is specifically mixing in illegally obtained cash in with legally obtained cash such as in the revenue of a business. One that you own or have an agreement with. It doesn't have even be counterfeit to be considering money laundering. But if I take a counterfeit bill and go buy something at the store with it, that in and of itself is not money laundering.

[@jaredmulconry]

Tom sold that swimming pool gag. I'm still laughing at that moment :')

[@AlexmaxPL]

Damn, does it have to end?

[@DavidAndrewsPEC]

+DestructionCoach Agreed .... would be awesome if it were two articles per episode.... that said, I could watch shitloads of this, all back to back.

[@zolika1351]

Or if it was just released uncut it would be awesome as well

[@Juli414]

I really need to learn to go to the bathroom before watching these.

[@shiftcyclicity]

The piscine bit kills me everytime....

[@lutzjamesa]

You guys just absolutely can't help ribbing on France, can you?

[@1e1001]

piscine distribution

[@rosedandy5047]

Thanks for the laughs, I look forward more Citation Needed and the linguistics videos.

[@maxpayne2574]

The conman set the Eifel Tower con up by renting an office in a building that also had government offices. He told the scrap dealers the the contract had to be kept quite to avoid public out cry.

[@knockbackcookie1923]

They predicted NFTs with the photocopy of money

[@oz_jones]

🙄

[@heretofore5817]

Oh no, last one! Really enjoyed this series - looking forward to the next one.

[@Sam-zd3dw]

I really like Gary's jumper in this

[@PokemonDiamondUS]

I needed the captions on this episode.

[@Whatmor]

Great Scott! I mean that was great, Scott :D

[@aasmund_ks6369]

Brilliant! Probably my favourite so far, can't wait til summer!

[@markog1999]

1000% the best thing ever

[@dbseamz]

10:24 "How can any machine take six hours to print something?" Ever heard of a 3D printer? Those take ages.

[@adammullarkey4996]

Andrew Swimming Pool is an odd name, yes, but saying that implies that Andrew Fish is perfectly sensible.

[@Zalied]

i like how everyone has a signature title and opening hello

[@neonte13]

But was Victor, though? You guys certainly are! Well, enjoy the break, lads, and thanks for another series of laughs!

[@dandyintheunderworld843]

100 club. I've been waiting a week for this.

[@revolver265]

I keep hearing my name, and then "fish". Also, my parents just named me "Andrei" only because they like french things. The origins of the name are Russian.

[@Juli414]

Two questions: Why does Gary have a bit of a Scottish burr on some of his words, more than the rest of y'all? Have y'all considered taking turns as quizmaster?

[@OlanKenny]

Pspaughtamus he's trying to be EXTRA Northern but at some point it gets Scottish

[@damientonkin]

Well I suppose if you keep going north it will get Scottish.

[@domy6827]

Absolutely delightful, I really enjoyed this one.

[@kairon156]

wow, this was amazingly funny, and I think the first time Mat won too.

[@georgebrindley1752]

Congratulations, you win a small pot of money that is used by a country music legend to buy condoms. It’s Johnny Cash’s johnny cash.

[@BunnyFett]

Gary is awesome. :D

[@macneilwhalen5711]

You should upload these episodes as podcasts to soundcloud!

[@Thefreakyfreek]

gary,s quote loonger you think abaut it funier it gets typing bad me is laucging

[@anthonywyndham]

this is brilliant

[@Valkyrien04]

something i just noticed, behind gary, are those eggs in the pantry? is that something that british style egg washing allows you to do?

[@ilexdiapason]

british lack of egg washing means we don't have to put eggs in the fridge

[@jamesshefchik9690]

Had me at "poisson" .

[@MrVinney96]

Already at the season ending? But whyyyyyyyy :(

[@U014B]

+Vel0city Because the season is over, that's why.

[@redcoat4348]

half of these don't have a citat.. ohhh

[@PointlessCamel]

Chris hardly got a word in. A new seating arrangement should fix that.

[@Tonatsi]

I am French and I highly approve

[@joshuamaloney5819]

11:03 wasn't that in Better Call Saul?

[@KayJblue]

Dang it, I already know who lustig is!

[@vwertix1662]

A burly french name ok Sebastian chabal

[@Armadeus]

marcel and judith

[@stefanf4110]

Shame that this topic was on QI not too long ago, so I'd heard most of the stories. Can I have some mystery biscuits?

[@joelgraves9392]

Did this guy inspire Despicable Me or something?

[@LazerLord10]

"How can a modern machine take any more than 6 hours to print something?!" 3D printing nerds be like

[@xmlthegreat]

I imagine a worried and confused French waiter backing away from Gary who is asking to be served a swimming pool.

[@theflev-matic4892]

LOLOLOL

[@Slitheringpeanut]

@Gordon Freeman A swimming pool and chips?

[@WindInMyWings]

Sometimes you're just really that thirsty

[@RacingStripeAV]

When you said that Poisson's wife thought that the deal was suspicious, I'm surprised no-one said she thought it seemed fishy... unless that one was left on the cutting room floor. (with apologies to anyone with the name "Poisson" or any variant of)

[@louyspoisson7220]

i accept the apology

[@thelastcube.]

ayyyy they should've aslo used that line on the fugu episode

[@TrulySpeechless]

Was thinking the exact same thing

[@sophiew757]

tom's exasperated "that's a swimming pool" killed me.

[@postmasterspecific]

Gary was nearly piscine himself after that

[@PentameronSV]

@@postmasterspecific I'm actually surprised they didn't make that Life of Pi joke

[@dseray9494]

The French for pisces is poisson, and I have, in multiple exams, called myself a pool as a result

[@CraftQueenJr]

I think “Andrew Swimming Pool” from Chris was somehow even funnier.

[@fafnir242]

@@CraftQueenJr Agreed 🤣

[@loganbrown898]

Tom should have "quite the opposite" printed on his t-shirt.

[@captainbeard3323]

I want that shirt

[@dittervancrook1735]

It is but it’s just printed in red

[@elifarmer3815]

Or "That is entirely plausible"

[@Jivvi]

Or "No, but you're getting a point anyway."

[@Finat0]

All of the above???

[@adamfoxton6341]

"He's just drawn a picture of the Eiffel Tower and he's selling that" SEVEN YEARS AGO, and Chris had invented the NFT.

[@ccf3294]

Amazing !

[@theplumbum82]

That would imply anyone buying an NFT is buying an image and not a hyperlink they could easily type themselves 😂

[@natestertf757]

"Was it invisible ink? Quite the opposite. Was it visible ink?"

[@theswaff699]

NatesterTF no, translucent

[@Tonatsi]

Swaffle no it’s quantum ink

[@sinenomine8101]

No, visible graphite.

[@thelastcube.]

"and you get a biscuit" sometimes the whole gist of the show point system

[@futrey9353]

So ink

[@EnteiFire4]

The French article has some very interesting information. For example, he apparently scammed Al Capone. He was imprisoned in Oklahoma, but managed to convinced the sherif to free him in exchange of a discount on his famous money printing machine. The sherif found him in Chicago, but Lustig explained to him that he didn't use the machine correctly, showed him how to use it, and then gave him $100 (of course, fake money) to pay for the travel.

[@Brannersatlarge]

IIRC we did talk about that when we filmed it but it didn't make the edit

[@MeghanaUppala-Flute]

what a legend, people kept falling for him, didn't they?

[@amyclarke6176]

They laugh about Andrew swimming pool but there is a guy my aunt works with who's name when translated out of German to Martin bicycle so I could understand swimming pool

[@leeroth4645]

I know a person who's name, when translated from Hebrew, is Oak Elefant.

[@misscutenar2333]

The dudes name is Fahrrad?!!

[@DaBaSoftware]

I know it's more of a figure of speech, but i always have an internal giggle at the end of these episodes when Tom says "I've been Tom Scott", because my American brain likes to think that he's only Tom Scott on Citation Needed.

[@oz_jones]

"i used to be Tom Scott. Still am, but used to be too"

[@losthor1zon]

@@oz_jones - Classic Hedberg!

[@jrimbault]

What were the chances that among your few French viewers there was one named "Jacques" ? FYI: in 2009, only a hundred children were named "Jacques" in France.

[@K9TheFirst1]

Well that's very sad.

[@robertwilloughby8050]

Wait, "Jack" and "Jake" are massive in other countries? Is this French exceptionalism?

[@vkillion]

I just realized that Matt won after Gary was like "Was he the bloke what sold the Eiffel Tower?"

[@dionnehendricks1763]

So I’m noticing a distinct lack of observations concerning Gary’s momentary transformation into a squeaky toy at 13:14

[@Joeseanag24]

Hmm

[@Balvald]

Lustig is a funny name.. quite literally

[@audiorage82407]

+Der Balvald My last name is also Lustig (pretty sure I'm related to the guy in the vid). My German prof in college had a field day with me when we were learning basic words along with describing ourselves. "Herr Lustig, bist du lustig?" "Ja, ich bin lustig" Light chuckles were had.

[@euchale]

+audiorage82407 Do you know Peter Lustig? He is/was a star in a children edutainment show in Germany.

[@audiorage82407]

Nope. We might be distantly related but as far as I know my Lustig heritage is American-born for at least two generations before me

[@stensoft]

Viktor Lustig didn't have any children and he wasn't born Lustig (his original name was Miller)

[@yogibear5995]

Reminds me of most von Ludwig from Terry Pratchett going postal story

[@djsalad5752]

Everyone else when Gary says “ ‘ang on a minute, is this the…”

[@daemonCaptrix]

Burly French name? "Gaston" :D

[@obliviousotterI]

NOO ONNES

[@Armadeus]

but now that ive grown i eat 5 dozen eggs

[@AgentTasmania]

Ferdinand (Foch).

[@richardmillhousenixon]

Piscine

[@THB192]

Andre Swimming Pool: It looks like Antonio Stella Bottom Tile has a cousin.

[@isabellamorris7902]

Hello, Ashens fan!

[@spoods4628]

Just got that.

[@lawrencecalablaster568]

I've just started watching Ashens & am so glad I found this comment.

[@JonatasAdoM]

Call the police: "this guy sold me a money printing machine" Good luck with that

[@scarylion1roar]

Burly French name: Jean Valjean

[@anno0001]

Only Citation Needed manages to make me laugh uncontrollably even after watching each episode multiple times! I love this show.

[@AbsolXGuardian]

I hurt my lungs watching this for like the fifth time

[@Robo0595]

gary: Is this the bloke what sold the eiffel tower? ... tom: at the end of that, Matt you win this weeks show!

[@oz_jones]

I think you have surmised it already but as it with British panel shows, the points are arbitrary.

[@brendanbethlehem999]

Chris: 5 Gary: 8 + Biscuits Matt: 7 Gary won!

[@ilexdiapason]

your research should not go unnoticed

[@thelastcube.]

This is going to the spreadsheet They don't choose the winner by proper points somehow

[@isaacbailey3681]

Could be points that didn’t make the cut.

[@Validole]

They're actually counting points? I thought Tom just picked the winner by intuition at the end...

[@zyaicob]

This show uses the QI points system

[@DCice13]

Tom, Can you show us how u prep for Citation Needed. I would like to play with friends. I assume u just read the article and build questions to move the episode to.

[@Quintinohthree]

I've been thinkimg about this as well. Could be a nice format for a quiznight.

[@maxximumb]

+Darkking Ice Citation Needed, the home game. I have an idea for a Kickstarter project!

[@Kishibe84]

That would be a very interesting video on its own!

[@DCice13]

+Guest91111 Sounds awesome, we need to create a page for articles that work well, awesome prices, and just general stuff like apps :D

[@Quintinohthree]

+Darkking Ice Ooh, make it as a wiki of sorts, totally meta.

[@snowfloofcathug]

Lustig is an alternate word in swedish for funny

[@swunt10]

+Lucas Forsberg yes it's german

[@MishaNem]

Describes this episode alright.

[@hotelmario510]

The "money printing machine" is a perfect example of the old maxim that "you can't con an Honest John".

[@p1rgit]

somehow it reminds me of story, supposedly in soviet russia - or anywhere - where genius counterfeiters saved their arses by simple trick: they printed on their counterfeit money with tiny letters smth to essence 'this is not real money' and flogged them to ppl with bad eyesight or rather, in places with bad light. trick's beauty was that in case of getting caught, punishment for counterfeiting money was huge and unpleasant, depending on amount, like, life sentence in siberia or smth, but as they were technically not counterfeiting but just selling paper defined as _not money_, they only got relatively small punishment, that for, what's official term, cheating or smth. scheming. you tell me. chris? also, do you know that counterfeit dollars are also semi-official currency in russia? not in banks, but between, let's say, ppl who prefer cash. it's worth one third of real dollars.

[@DarleneLesmana]

ah yes, andrew hello, andrew fries, andrew horse, andrew the beach, andrew swimming pool, and finally, andrew fish. the boys.

[@faielgila7375]

"How could anything take 6 hours to print‽" 3D printers, Gary, those take forever for medium to large prints.

[@PhoenixClank]

I read this somewhere some time ago, was it here? I can't find it. Anyway The swimming pool is called piscine because it's what you piss in.

[@CloudHopperCat]

But what if he faked his death?

[@snowfloofcathug]

Misty Magic 😱

[@realmenshoot3085]

AThoughtfulBethany He died in Alcatraz. They make sure the prisoner is well and truly dead before they release the body.

[@KenjiWardenclyffe]

i swear Tom's hair looks different colors in Citation Needed episodes than other ones. unless im just really tired.

[@wiet111]

+Kenji Wardenclyffe Maybe he uses a different camera or different lighting?

[@engineerwolf3692]

+Kenji Wardenclyffe aren't they recorded some time ago? like tv seasons.

[@Brannersatlarge]

+Engineerwolf Yep, we did these in early October

[@panda4247]

Having seen this video many times (I listen to old TechDiff episodes often before sleep), but not recently, my mind randomly came with a realization today... The reason why Gary said "piscine" thinking it's fish, is *probably* related to the fact, that there is a constellation Pisces, which comes from latin word for fish. And that is the problem.... it's from Latin, not from French

[@oz_jones]

French is a Romance language

[@notdoneyet1361]

How did you just skim over the fact that he scammed Al Capone and got away with it?

[@sugamthakur055]

Random KZbin suggestion and now Going to watch full series. See you later. (July 2021)

[@gameofchoice931]

6:30 that is a *con*fession

[@thelastcube.]

I like you

[@moshill1374]

"Andrew Swimming Pool"

[@onionbot2]

‘Andrew Fish’

[@scruffyronin9382]

I’m on my second trip through citation needed during quarantine. Helps me relax for some reason

[@ZeldaTheSwordsman]

Sebastian Vettle's Metal Kettle. Which would become Matt's Scaly Kettle?

[@futrey9353]

Frites et frites. Logique.

[@futrey9353]

By the way, is anyone gonna let pass matt's flawless reference of a "moules-frites"? I didn't even know he knew that

[@MaitredeDieu]

thanks for subtitling this show, as french it gets tricky to understand 3:03 for instance. you guys are knowledgeable :D PS: piscine is pronounced "piss-in" btw

[@JH1010IsAwesome]

"Visible ink."

[@CaterinaMastrogiacomo]

What's the translation of fish? ⬜Cheval ⬜Poisson ✔️ Piscine