We Grew Up In A Violent Household | {THE AND} Paul-Arthur & Stephen

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Paul-Arthur (he/him) and Stephen (he/him) are brothers. Paul-Arthur, the younger sibling, joins Stephen on the face-to-face chairs of {THE AND} for the second time (link to the conversation with their dad down below) to discuss the roots of their conflicts as brothers, how growing up in a violent household affects children and shapes the adults they will eventually become, the ever-changing and evolving dynamic of mutual respect, and using pain and trauma to grow and become better versions of themselves. Their relationship has had its rocky moments, but over time, they have managed to work through their differences and disagreements in order to strengthen their bond, support each other, and slowly learn how to love one another.
Watch Paul-Arthur's conversation with his dad: • Guiding My Son To Be A...
We'd like to thank Paul-Arthur and Stephen for participating openly and vulnerably in our project. We appreciate what they've shared with us and we hope you do as well, there's something to learn from every conversation.
As we explore new perspectives we invite you to step into the emotional space of connection and experience the deeper lessons that shared experiences can afford humanity. To everyone who has participated openly and vulnerably in our project - we appreciate what you have shared with us and hope others do as well.
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EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR | Topaz Adizes
PRODUCTION MANAGER | Marisela Delgado
DIRECTOR OF PHOTOGRAPHY | Kat Hennessey
CAMERA OPERATOR | Albert Dantzer
SOUND | Jackson Collins Jr.
EDITOR | Samanta Barbosa
WITH THE PARTICIPATION OF | Paul-Arthur & Stephen
We Grew Up In A Violent Household | {THE AND} Paul-Arthur & Stephen

[@arlenetucker8416]

Younger brother caught the violence that had nothing to do with him, it makes me sad the older brother can’t move from that emotional space. They’re adults now and he takes every opportunity to humble his brother in the most negative way meanwhile younger brother lovingly forgiving and absorbing all of the passive aggressive speech. I’m really rethinking my interactions with my younger sister, I never want to hurt her like this.

[@MaxineShaw_84]

Between all the "What you have to understand is" ...and constantly proclaiming how mature he thinks he's become, it's immediately clear that big bro is operating from a place of dominance rather than understanding. Very important video, given how common this dynamic is... in family, friendships, business etc.

[@suava375]

This is painful to watch as a big brother. Expressing delight in having a physical altercation is something I could never feel because I love my siblings that much; regardless if they were completely in the wrong. It’s belittling, when you could use moments like this to build each other up. I hope y’all continue to have more genuine conversations like this for the better of your brotherhood and future as a family tho!

[@arlenetucker8416]

Similar thoughts. Grateful that they shared, their interview became a checklist of what not to do to anyone, ever. How can you grow when you’re taking every opportunity to belittle😢 I hope they get some peace, this made my heart hurt.

[@bryannascott1448]

I pray Paul-Arthur, the younger brother, finds the strength & courage to heal from afar. His older brother needs healing and guidance, that generational trauma is spewing out of him & he doesn't even realize it. I can't imagine bragging and gloating about humiliating and abusing a family member, while claiming in the same breath to be a "better brother now." very sad to witness this.

[@Quandryification]

I knew when the older brother opened with "Remember you asked me to come on here" twice at the beginning this was going to be uncomfortable. He doesn't respect him....

[@tm.7233]

It’s interesting because this is exactly what growing up in a violent family does. It is filled with resentment, violence and disrespect that siblings have for each other and the competition. The lack of empathy that they have for each other is what makes this worse. I will say that the younger brother seems calm but that doesn’t always mean he is in the right. And at the same time the older brother seems mean and immature. They both need serious help, but it takes a lot to bring up and talk about these issues.

[@jasmined3670]

Completely agree! Hopefully they move onward and upward from here, both in their relationship and individually with themselves

[@RoyJoyce873]

If it hadn’t have been pointed out during the interview, I’d be adamant that the little brother was in fact the older sibling. He’s so much more mature and if his older brother dropped the ego, he could learn a lot from him.

[@Shesirie]

I want the little brother to find healing and find people who will lot be him positively. I can see the pain in his face as his brother makes jokes as he'trying to be sincere. Distance is needed for sure.

[@bri_rene]

This was kind of sad. The older brother seems strange, toxic, and abusive. He seemed so proud and happy to talk about the fight he had with his younger brother.

[@alexiscaldwell4133]

It’s interesting how Stephen said “Remember…YOU brought ME here” in the intro of the video.. but it seems he didn’t even consider why his brother brought him there. Most likely, Paul wanted reconciliation, he wanted to hear reassurance from his brother that he loved him, he wanted to be vulnerable w his brother & finally maybe gain some respect.. & he still didn’t. All he got was insults, demeaning, & condescending remarks from a brother that’s still trying to teach him a “lesson”. Perhaps there is long stemming resentment from things occurred none of us know about. Perhaps big brother has let anger build up & allowed Paul to slide on previous occasions & this was his time to release. But hopefully he can be more tender with his brother… & be the mature example. Life teaches us tough love far too often…sometimes we need family to be a safe place. Paul Arthur, salute to you for taking the initiative & wanting to talk man to man with your brother. You are respected.

[@erucya2799]

Good observation.

[@Y_girr]

Big bro is still a bully and congntive abuse pours out of him every time he opens his mouth. Younger brother, leave and love from afar. You are not getting the love, understanding and respect that you NEED. You deserve better.

[@knt9284]

The younger brother wanted to have a space to heal and bond with his brother. Unfortunately, his brother took it as an opportunity to gloat about how he beat him up. And also to say how he’s been wanting to beat him up shows old animosity and jealousy he has for his brother and used the kids incident as a chance to do it. Older brother is extremely immature and has low emotional intelligence. Younger brother please know that you tried and it’s OK to separate from him for your own peace. Family isn’t everything.

[@tarynbutler5864]

The gloating and happiness when talking about the fight..wow. 😢

[@Zama-K]

😢so sad

[@JaneInThisThang]

Older brother is very immature. Still got some “growing” to do

[@TrellW.]

Maaad immature

[@jcross52583]

Big brother sounds jealous and like he has a lot of growing up to do. Lil brother sounds like he needs to get away from big brother and stay away.

[@TrellW.]

Det Pawt

[@elyseorabuena7855]

Honestly. And this is so sad to hear and see

[@thetrishadenise]

I have the same thoughts. The irony is that the older brother is very immature and has much growing to do. He needs healing from his childhood and therapy with their parents.

[@Tdottdot]

Yep the older brother is very immature. And the way he relished in beating him up is sad af.

[@scoochie88]

This was unfortunate to watch. The glee the older brother still feels reminiscing about inflicting pain on his sibling was unsettling. Emotional intelligence is low. It might be best to put some distance in this unhealthy relationship until the older brother can mature a bit or work through his traumas.

[@AirItTfOutPodcast]

When people justify trauma in their lives, it breaks my heart. You weren’t supposed to be parentified as a child, you weren’t supposed to be beaten, you weren’t supposed to be a latch key kid, you weren’t supposed to be embarrassed and humiliated, you weren’t supposed to be abused! I apologize that you went through so much sadness and pain. The FIRST step to breaking a generational curse is to tell the truth. Paul Arthur, you are the GOAT. I know at times it may feel like the you are the Black Sheep, but always realize that the Black Sheep is really the mfn goat! 🐐 💯

[@goodinbf]

Yes! Hearing the older brother talk about his mom's experience as an excuse for their childhood was so sad. His mom could have had personal things going on AND simultaneously NOT been the best mother. It seems the older brother has a lot of healing to do and needs to be honest with himself about how their family dynamic, and his role in it, has affected others.

[@josefloressalinas3832]

Big. Brother is the worst person you want to be around.

[@oyandakona5994]

True hey shuu

[@chantelove123ify]

Crazy how the older brother is turning into their toxic parents for their little brother 😢

[@rashidaelizabeth5717]

"I been waiting to put my hands on you for a long time" is I N S A N E. this hurts to watch/hear.

[@oyandakona5994]

😫😫

[@thevoiceofdean]

I understamd how people feel the way they do watching this but do remember he showed up. That was very brave. He may not have responded very skillfully or compassionately, but he cared enough to let himself go through that for at his brother's request. I do hope he reads the comments without feeling defensive and finds truth wherever it can be found. Brave of both of you. Love this channel

[@TheSkinDeep]

THIS! Thank you!!! ❤️ We need more comments like this! We love you too!

[@goldengilmaky6788]

Where did having a dialogue instead of fighting go? This older brother has so much maturing to do. This was a very stressful experience. There was no healing at all. I hope you bring them back to reflect on this episode and the feedback they received. Skin Deep can be the bridge they need. Heartbreaking.

[@TheSkinDeep]

Thanks for believing in he power of The Skin Deep! We appreciate it, and yes, hopefully we will have them back one day and things will be better, for everyone!

[@loveheals6184]

I think most of us would've loved to see some kindness untethered from cruelty as humor from Stephen, whom I initially thought was the younger brother. However, the Disney or Hallmark movie ending isn't always the case. It would be insincere and destructive for them to return soley for the emotional comfort of us as spectators/audience. While this was painful to watch, it was powerful and necessary. My understanding of The Skin Deep is that powerful, sensitive topics are discussed which sometimes elicit clarity, joy, deeper loving connections, acknowledgments of wrongs, etc. However, setting the stage and cultivating care is one side- respect, empathy, openness, genuine interest in participation and intentionality about being a full human being with awareness that the other person is as fully human as you are necessary components. Sometimes seeing ourselves from a distance is crucial in helping us see what we're doing right/wrong regardless of who cosigns or chastises or gives no feedback. Neither needs to return for a "redemption arc" cos we also live in a social media age where people front. Of course we can't know the full story. However, I'm actually glad that the dynamic was laid bare. I hope they both have continued profound healing, growth and maturity. This was an important episode for viewers who bore witness and for the brothers themselves.

[@kathy2888]

Weird he described his brother as flamboyant when I felt he was. This video was uncomfortable

[@PA25293]

Hello All. Thank You For Watching. This Was My 2nd Episode On The Platform. I Want To Thank The Skin Deep For Welcoming Me Back And For Allowing My Brother To Join Me. I Know This Was Tough To Watch For Alot Of You, However Please Exercise Patience If You Choose To Speak On My Brother. Allow Him The Grace To Walk On His Own Path To Healing. God Bless.

[@GoddessElevation]

It’s very kind of you to hold that space for your brother. And yes, this was just a glimpse of him. I hope that if he reads a lot of these, perhaps he can come to an understanding of the growth and healing he needs. It’s an overwhelming consensus that perhaps it can be useful for him to consider.

[@TheSkinDeep]

Thank you for giving us your time and sharing your story with us, we love and appreciate you ❤️ and yes! We couldn't have said it better ourselves! :)

[@bedopefitness4664]

This video reminds me of the relationship I have with my brother ( A real Bully ) I've gotten tired of it yearsssss ago and lost respect for him even to the point I have to "Square Up" with him I wasn't happy afterwards but I felt POWERFUL and alive and needed that to allow me that you can be strong and walk in your power. Thank you for sharing this deep video it really touched my heart. Stay Unique, stay strong, continue to heal. #LOVE

[@alsith4451]

I pray he also affords you the patience, you are asking us to afford him...too! God bless you❤

[@bedopefitness4664]

@@alsith4451 Thank you 👑

[@Ebony_]

He’s a bully. Just get away. Leave that state. Call and visit sparsely if you must. He’s playing you by talking about how much he’s learning and growing. Don’t let him fool you. Not anymore. you don’t need a big brother like that.

[@JSJ-Z]

the "big brother" you would never want - he doesn’t love his baby bro 😢 he despises him. he used every opportunity to put his younger brother down, he's horrible.

[@selenabolton3773]

The older brother was SO CLOSE to the point when he answered where the problem stems from! He has to continue healing in order to see that the “baby” brother is NOT his enemy or PUNCHING BAG to relieve his pain. Prayers for them both 🙏🏽

[@dianatee466]

I felt like there was minimal vulnerability…older brother covered up his pain and love with anger and humor.

[@chasityc.6863]

Much respect to the younger brother. You exude genuine love, respect, emotional intelligence and maturity. When you recognize that you don’t need the validation that you seek from your older brother, you’ll be so much better for it. He takes pleasure in abusing you, physically, mentally and emotionally. That’s not love. Go find the people that love you in a real way.

[@kwmuraguri4302]

The older brother is emotionally exhausting to watch - take “abuse” to be strong or a man? He throws around all the buzz words - shadow, trauma, etc., but reverts to violence as how you grow and love others. Wild.

[@tomial.971]

He kept trying to bring up the fight and finally did which was so immature. you could tell he wanted to expose that story so bad from the beginning saying “this is going on the internet”…and why remember the EXACT date that it happened too? to keep it as a day he’ll never forget. the “big” brother is super bogus for that

[@mermaidmelody7896312]

I was resonating with ol dude on the left till the argument about the kids. It takes a village to discipline children. Sounds like he's raising unruly iPad kids... Guy on the right did correctly by coming to the childrens parents and not yelling/disciplining the kids directly.

[@idongesitjoshua7172]

I think in the older brother is only trying to tell the younger brother to work on his emotional intelligence, relational intelligence and to respect boundaries. Obviously, the younger brother had his Daddy's backing most of the time and really does know what life is like from the older brothers lens.

[@idongesitjoshua7172]

The scenerio cited is very typical but as long as they are not your kids and your opinion is not asked for .. it's better to manage how you feel even if they are your siblings children. No parent really like other ppl disciplining their children even when they are wrong. They expect you to endure their kids mess and let them handle it

[@alsith4451]

​@@idongesitjoshua7172he is their Uncle!! Not a sibling to their father only...here in Africa your uncle is your second dad!! You run to him when 1st dad is not getting you...thus he is your dad...he needs no permission to reprimand his nephews for they are his kids too... now the fight was not about the kids, but about bottled issues and matters held by the father...and he got an opportunity to release!! Then violence...

[@kimberlysmith6188]

The older brother needs to seek healing, he’s ill. The way he behaved about beating his brother is wild. If someone says they couldn’t wait cuss you or “put hands on you,” they never liked you.

[@jacquieb6997]

They both have CPTSD and need to heal. I hope the best for them both

[@Duhshaad]

I was disgusted by this video, I can’t BELIEVE the way the older brother was acting, especially towards his younger brother…he ought to be ashamed of himself for this honestly…

[@jaelyric1]

So the older brother has resentment because his younger brother did go through the same abuse or struggles he did? And then the older brother floats and expresses happiness about beating his younger brother. Throw it all away

[@oyandakona5994]

Imagine he is so wrong

[@Beautifullyaberrant]

For someone who requires people to understand.. he has a lot of understanding to do

[@BusinessOfBeing]

I wish big bro listened more to his lil brother. There is power in listening. Listening (with the heart) heals and transforms. There is a time to teach but imho this wasn't it. This could have been a moment to listen differently. Also, a love that feels like an ass whooping isn't love, that's pain... infused with fear. That said, I pray and affirm that this edited version of your conversation opens the door to a deeper healing and connection. It takes courage to share your story with the world. 👊🏾🤎👊🏾

[@kristalm4955]

Older brother has a lot of emotional and mental growing up to do. I've also never met a male scorpion so arrogant. He's talks but does not listen well at all.

[@jasmined3670]

I think he’s listening, he just also has a right to feel the way he feels… there were a lot of parts of certain stories that were cut out so we can’t base a 20 minute video on 34 years of their relationship and experience, we don’t know exactly what happened

[@courtneyemm8894]

When the conversation opened with “remember you wanted to do this” I knew where this was headed.

[@tamathagilbert5816]

🙏🏿🌸🙏🏿🌸🙏🏿🌸 It is powerful that they both showed up, just where they each are at in their individual healing journey, and committed to having this conversation. Not many people would be willing to do that, given that both know communication would and will be bumpy. This is real talk, real vulnerability, real communication. Raw communication with some uncomfortable truths and possible misunderstandings. Sometimes, you just have to get thru the bumpy talks to grow toward smoother comminication. Takes time, growth, mutual willingness, forgiveness, and uncompromising honesty. As long as they keep talking, eventually, they will start to hear each other and feel where each other is at from each other's perspectives... Family is everything...Just don't give up. Keep showing up. Keep talking. Healing will find it's way to y'all, and mutual respect will grow stronger among you both for each other over time. Much respect to you both for your willingness to share this conversation....🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿

[@TheSkinDeep]

THIS!!! Thank you thank you thank you! Amazing perspective on the conversation, we really appreciate it, you're sooo right! ❤️ Love you!

[@tamathagilbert5816]

😇🌹😇

[@MonifaAdebola]

They showed up, but the mirror was so murky and full of smokes and screens. I learned a lot just by watching their responses to each other. The older one is a bully and abusive, and the younger one is seeking love in the wrong place and may have issues with discerning his worth and that recognising love when it actually appears. I hope they find healing.

[@melindanicole1]

This was so difficult to watch.

[@gretchenrucker382]

This was a tough watch. My heart goes out to the younger brother. He is so mature and open, and wants that for his older brother. The older brother needs a A LOT of work on himself.

[@Neys_Nest]

The older is highly functioning narcissist and broken soul that preys on his little brother brokenness .I’m thankful how the little brotha handled it

[@chioma5633]

Nah he’s low functioning

[@butterfly1873]

The older brother really had nothing to teach the younger brother. He used the talk to beat up the younger brother with words he had a lot built resentment . It’s was a missed opportunity to really bond with his younger brother and air things out. The older brother has the anger of a 13 year old Hoodlum. The younger came out looking like the mature one. Sad they didn’t get the love they should have as kids.

[@km-yaheard]

The big brother's ego fills up the room... despite what was said, this is not a safe space for the younger brother. I personally would detach before I deal with that as a grown adult.

[@Ebony_]

I just wanna go take lil brother away. He can be big bro to my sons and get real love from all of us. My sons are amazing kind people. Would take him in in a heartbeat.

[@dyonniahill1213]

The kids running around while both the parents are sleep is crazy… Big bro definitely childish he shouldn’t have started the conversation with “maturity” I’m disgusted at the fact that big bro has kids

[@_pattisimone]

I cannot finish watching this because the big brother is ugh 🙄 I’m too sensitive to watch this!!

[@amirasinaaya]

I’m way tooooo sensitive

[@_pattisimone]

@@amirasinaaya yess! I immediately started crying looking at the younger brother face!

[@sayhukwarren]

geez stephen is a villian in the second half of this video. Hurts my heart as a middle sibling and a big brother.

[@MaxineShaw_84]

It's clear from the beginning of the video.

[@MsSong2U]

If it wasn’t stated in the video, I would bet money that Stephen is the younger sibling. Wow, Stephen is that family member you love a far off.

[@TheSkinDeep]

No :( Stephen is the older brother, we all take our time and different paths when it comes to healing and becoming a better version of ourselves, let's not forget this is a safe space for them to express themselves!

[@Mochelle_]

Seems like he needed the cops called on him cause the joy in violence was alittle odd. But explaining their upbringing def explained it.

[@LeahSalmon]

He keeps talking about how much he's grown and boasts about his progress then revels in the memory of beating up his brother and gloats about it, I really feel for the younger brother and the older one needs therapy

[@shelbyspellman3046]

I purposely didn’t read the comments while watching this video because I wanted to make my opinions w/o outside noise… the brother laughing and feeling like violence was his way to demand respect truly only demanded fear and a lack of awareness to just walk away && it’s nothing more than I hate is when someone tries to diminish your experience. Just because his brother may have had a different life doesn’t mean he’s not allowed to feel because he can’t be the dictator of how’s he’s to react when he’s not him .

[@neatynel]

im sorry but... ew. based on what i just watched, i have to say the older brother is super embarrassing, seems madd immature, and unfortunately is stuck in his ways. honestly, the little brother needs to "love" from a distance and continue molding his mind into the great gentleman that he already displays. it's important to protect your soul and to stay solid with your boundaries and how you know you should be treated..... especially when the manipulation is literally screaming in your face. it's like they're both shattered and the older brother doesn't even attempt to put himself back together but rather cut others. as for the little brother, it shows that he is trying to fix his broken pieces but realizes that some pieces are just too shattered to the point where he has to create his own pieces to the best of his knowledge, to fix what is broken.

[@constancecoco7539]

Thank you both for your honesty. You are incredible men.

[@TheSkinDeep]

Thank you for leaving this comment, you are incredible as well ❤️

[@ptlovelight2971]

Well, this video proves that some sibling relationships are just not meant to be saved...was hoping for a positive interaction, so i could at least have hope for my own estranged sibling relationship. But just like my older sister, this older brother is too lost in his pain and trauma to hear what the younger one is saying. Narcissism and violent childhoods leave broken people everywhere

[@rahelfitsum7143]

Big brother is a complete bully wow I pray little brother finds the healing he so deserves!

[@bedopefitness4664]

This reminds me of my brother and I... ( Sadly)

[@anne-marieriley9403]

I found this so hard to watch, why is the older brother so proud of assaulting his brother? Boasting about shit like that while claiming to “grow” and “mature”.. that’s wild to me..

[@magsc426]

The older brother is very immature and honestly exhibited bullying tendencies. Surprised that he would even call out his brother on being immature. I pray that they each find healing because there is a lot of hurt and pain there.

[@tyturner5870]

Im an older twin brother & I have one sister….i wouldn’t doing this in our conversation’s. I’ll listen and understand and show grace cuz we all three been in DV situations and our mom was the biggest none helpful person cuz she was the one doing the most…showing strength in fighting goes help or being cocky smh 🤦🏾‍♂️

[@iam.mikaylamikayla]

This is hard to watch. And to be honest the exact reason why broken homes cause problems for generations.

[@jamilyngordon5642]

"Big" brother expects and demands respect yet fails miserably at being an example of a man worthy of it. No accountability, no ability to teach, no grace, no maturity, no introspection. This was super sad to watch yet I know the comments will come through in saying everything the younger brother has not been given the safe space to express.

[@MonifaAdebola]

Omg what a toxic sibling relationship. The older brother is disrespectful and treats his younger sibling like a child and straight abusive. The younger brother needs to walk away and learn to find love elsewhere. No love lost because no love is there. That was so scary and sad to watch.

[@R3nnyboo]

I literally thought the younger brother WAS the older brother... this was so hard to watch mannn... older brother has sooo much learning, healing, and maturing to do. He is not who he thinks he is .. Saying his younger brothers love feels immature... and yet younger brother describes his as an a** whooping... jeeesus. Get away from this man, emotionally abusive asf

[@rosieglasses]

This was very hard to watch. The older brother feels like he’s redirecting what he went through in his younger brother. He resents his younger brother and is relishing withholding the love he knows his brother wants. To me that doesn’t say growth. To me that says passing on the generational trauma and continuing the cycle of abuse. It feels like he was waiting for the day to physically abuse his brother the way he was abused and when he found the opportunity, he relished it much as he still does. That’s human, it’s understandable but it’s not ok and it’s not growth. And I see younger brother defending big brother at every turn. There are many roles different people play in a dysfunctional family system. He has been made the scapegoat and feels the need to protect. This is all just my opinion but I hope they continue to work through this trauma and truly heal.

[@cynthx]

Older brother is upset. Stephen is chillin. Love to Stephen. Hope the angry one heals

[@ahchiso]

Stephen is the older brother…

[@whitneybrown4067]

This is Gonna b so Insightful 4 Sure🔥🔥🔥👍n Happy Wednesday😀….

[@alsith4451]

Stephen!!! SMH!!! He keeps pointing IMMATURITY @ Paul; but he is the one over excited at beat-ups! Jumping around with sarcastic smiles/laughs! THE REAL IMMATURE ONE! i feel is a good uncle, but that role will always be stomped down by his big brother/father of his nephews, for Stephen has alot of growing to do and alot of issues with self to resolve! Even saying this i can feel his energy hating on it and blaming it on Paul! Stephen please grow up and heal! Paul you really OK BY ME... God may he not be crucified for my words...❤

[@traciwitcher7656]

This is an unfortunate conversation. Big brother was listening to RESPOND and to not hear what little bro was saying. The fight conversation was just uncomfortable his go to is swinging and not using his words. What is he teaching his children ugh.... it looked like lil bro wanted to cry. Im glad i have a good relationship with my siblings....

[@lisapowell2333]

This was very hard to watch made me sad and uncomfortable. You can tell the older brother definitely has tried to put the younger brother “in his place” it really made my stomach hurt seeing him smile, and laugh and giggle and pretend to cry and just be so condescending to his little brother. I hope he gets help and realizes how he acted was not OK.

[@tundraillustration]

I feel like the younger brother was so disappointed in the end. He didn't get much praise from the older brother. Honestly I felt he was progressively refraining from words towards the end. Like walking on egg shells. I am sorry, but honestly I would choose to have space and keep apart from all that toxicity.

[@nneka81]

I felt cringe after watching this conversation 😢

[@samuelrosslee408]

From the comments I've read here, I sense a dislike for the older brother. It seems as if he resents his brother, for sure. I would not draw the same conclusions as others, as we don't know the source or the context of that apparent resentment. It's important to recognize the limitations of our understanding. The brief glimpse we've had into the brothers' relationship is just that-a glimpse. We can't possibly know all the details that would give us a complete picture. The older brother's tone and even his introduction to this conversation reveal much, but there is much more we need to learn about why and where that tone is coming from. We know some of what the older brother did, but what did the more serene younger brother do over the years leading up to that moment? Anything? We don't know. Remember, serenity can hide a great deal behind its calm demeanor.

[@blacknyx19]

This was so cringe. I was confused at who was the little brother for awhile

[@CaptMoo]

I mean..... yeeesh... big brother says lil bro is inmature, but he sings "we find love in a hopeless place" and quotes Stone Cold Steve Austin etc... BUT!!! Hey! He grew up in a mess. And he admits it. Lil bro really wants love from him thats it. Big brother is like a 1977 father. Anyway... Hope for the best.

[@dbrooks8621]

I think it's unreasonable to try to choose sides here. People are taking the younger brother's side because he is quieter and appears to be looking for love here. These two have so much baggage that I am left puzzled at what I saw and heard. I don't know what they accomplished with this time together. It felt unsatisfying to me when responses aren't more than "you feel me?". I hope they got something out of it but those last few moments of disagreeing over how they even touch each other is just sad. My sister has been dead longer than she lived now. I hope they keep trying to talk to each other.

[@YenWay-v2b]

Hugs to the little brother> As a big sister you have got to take responsibility. Also all the cussing is unnecessary. The superiority thing is unnecessary and we have to let go.

[@Isabella-kh4vr]

I hope older brother seen this comment section

[@onomeavae978]

Most people are chastising the elder brother but he grew up in violence,and he hasnt healed from that and the younger one is matured enough to know this... They both werent given the chance to know or show love and respect.. they both need to communicate constantly..

[@Jortyunofficial]

Video would’ve been over after the fight monologue. Because there goes another black man unwilling to take accountability for his actions because he felt disrespected, but they’re not willing to respect others. He ain’t his brother’s daddy. He’s not there to discipline his brother. That’s not his place, regardless of age. The family dynamic among a lot of black families is so skewed and messed up and it needs to be fixed from the ground up, no excuses and no bullshit. Just some empathy, compassion and accountability

[@miguelrodriguez9908]

My man glazed over flamboyant and didn’t stop lol.

[@angelturner7692]

Unhealthy relationship the younger brother has to separate himself now!!

[@florentinalestaru7273]

pfuuu.. both of them have serious issues with boundaries and dealing with conflict in a healthy way.. and they are trying to discuss about a violent instance while having A LOT of baggage of unresolved problems with themselves and among themselves.. this is just more of the same dynamic they've had their whole lives.. I do not agree that the younger brother is more mature here.. among the unhealthy things the older brother is saying, he is also pointing out some issues correctly - even though his way of dealing with those issues is deeply wrong. No one here is taking true ownership for their parts..

[@jasmined3670]

You can tell certain parts of the video were cut out so we really don’t know the details of all the situation’s spoken on… hopefully they can grow from this conversation

[@TheSkinDeep]

Exactly, that's our hope as well, that we can help them grow and heal ❤️ let's spread the love people!

[@DeeX7201]

Big bro seems hella silly at this point into the video

[@111prettywings]

😢😢😢

[@cmoorespeaks2385]

Your older brother does not like you Paul Arthur

[@ElsieMagu]

Um…😬

[@oyandakona5994]

He is mean bully this is not the way to treat your sibling. Horrible so unhuman

[@mongememofredo7975]

Big bro is absolutely right, in life you must pay attention to your behaviour especially if you warned not to do something but you choose to disobey, you will pay for it

[@shamiso_t]

10:18 Sir what??! No

[@Snook0626]

Yeah..... this convo wouldn't go this way with me and my brother. This man is lame wow. He is such a terrible older brother. He's basically justifying his abuse of his little brother.