We Rank Every State (YALL GON BE MAD!) - Kinda Funny Podcast (Ep. 201)

[@MattBatson]

I think I speak for everyone when I say no problems with this list! Great job gang! Keep up the good work!

[@blindsaintnick]

you probably don't speak for everyone, there's a lot of people and a lot states

[@T9324]

@@blindsaintnick thats.the.joke.

[@cam4748]

Nick: Rhode Island is land locked Me (an RI native): *looks out my window and sees nothing but shoreline and open ocean*

[@kindafunny]

lolololol - Greg

[@kindafunny]

You know what I meant! -Nick

[@dolfincorn]

@@kindafunny No we don't! lol

[@davefreeburg7346]

For the nerds, the full name of the colony was Rhode Island and Providence Plantations (Aquidneck Island was called Rhode Island at the time). It was shortened to Rhode Island, presumedly because by God such a small state shouldn’t have such a long name. It makes no sense, and all the sense at the same time. Love, a librarian from Connecticut.

[@EnfieldsMikeP]

@@davefreeburg7346 And by the way, we only dropped it in 2020, mostly because of its recognition of the state's role as a slave-trading hub in early American history

[@baundiesel]

Nick basically rated the non-California states by whether he spent 30 minutes there and had a good meal. 🤣

[@ShaolinPrince718]

I honestly don't see an issue with that 🤣

[@aaronsurber6948]

Greg: “Let’s be clear, California is the best. We are the best. Get over it. We have the best everything. Greg 30 seconds later: “New York, you’re full of concede people cause you think you’re the best”

[@TagRoss]

There's the difference, we KNOW we're the best

[@egperez31]

Californians are conceited because they need the validation. New Yorkers don't need the validation because we know that when anyone in the world imagines a city, they think of us. We may have seventeen roommates, but we all live rent-free inside your dome, buddy. Bing Bong.

[@JoeSmithGOAT]

@@egperez31 bInG bOnG KNICKS SUCK ASS

[@19RoFlMao19]

@@JoeSmithGOAT umm yankees are there to beat yo ass. If not them then we got the fake italians and pretty much everyone who lives in nyc

[@egperez31]

@@JoeSmithGOAT We know and don't give a fuck. Our team is more culturally significant just for existing than your team is for its success.

[@tylerotten]

Nick: "Name me a state bigger than Texas" Kevin (instantly): "Alaska" Classic.

[@connersmith4801]

I thought he knew and was setting up the joke but he actually thought it was 😂

[@Horus1688]

Dudes: We're not rating the cities. Dudes 25 minutes later: Shout out to you, Boston.

[@kindafunny]

I gave up and/or only used it when it was advantageous to me. - Greg

[@Horus1688]

@@kindafunny It was a ton of fun. You all are talented to turn this into an hour of entertainment.

[@egperez31]

States aren't just their cities,... except for when Pennsylvania is just Philadelphia and we're unaware of the existence of Pittsburgh.

[@jacobpm723]

Tim’s “so #2” comment on NY after Greg spends an entire monologue shitting on it is exactly the opener this episode needed

[@egperez31]

Nick Scarpino: "Don't start a state and then name one of your cities the same name as the state next to you.... That's like if we had a city named "Nevada City" in California." Wikipedia: "Nevada City is a city and county seat in Nevada County, California"

[@imTofuDragon]

Yeah California is huge wouldn't doubt if there's other towns and cities name off of other states

[@IrishClone]

As an Iowan, I was clicking through wondering where they put us. As I continued to not see Iowa I realized, they definitely forgot about us 😂 Not gonna lie second to last fits though

[@snakiercoyote3390]

hello fellow iowan

[@pakman3050568]

Makes sense Greg wanted Wisconsin in F tier. He's from Illinois, FIB

[@Elliott3223]

Being from Iowa I often forget I'm from there, so this assessment tracks

[@chrisbessette7987]

“We exported a lot of assholes to Colorado” Nick as a Coloradan this made me spit out my coffee. So fuckin funny.

[@Ki11ersix]

West Virginia has to be ranked higher than Virginia. WV split from VA because VA wanted to retain slavery. WV fought for the Union. Also, Country Roads. Beautiful scenery. Meth. Poverty. Ok, yeah, D tier.

[@egperez31]

That annoyed me a little. Kevin taking shit about how it's more North instead of West (which is not) and not knowing the fact that the only reason they broke away was because they stayed loyal to the Union. Like, fuck off.

[@selfactualizing]

@@egperez31 it's not a serious list based on facts. Pure comedy and entertainment fuckery is the sole purpose

[@MeBeEric]

Country Roads was written in and kinda about MD tho

[@XDisintegrationX]

As a Californian, I obviously agree with #1, but it is hilarious hearing a bunch of guys in SF telling New Yorkers to stop shitting in public.

[@jeremyvisser3877]

Sometimes it's hard to smell your own shit...even if its on the sidewalk next to you.(This is Satire)

[@Gabriel14366]

I feel like what holds California back from actually being number one is the fact that every major city is essentially an elaborate homeless encampment. It's pretty crazy out there even compared to New York the homeless villages in the middle of the major cities in California is next level

[@egperez31]

Also, the drought, earthquakes, actively being on fire, history of Native slavery and Chinese exclusion, present-day exploitation of migrant workers, the crazy assholes in the north part of the state who want to secede...

[@holy_schnikes_aj]

Kevin, to be fair... when people laugh when you fall that means you're young. The moment people stop laughing from you falling is the moment you're old.

[@zenifftorrey8669]

Kevin: Washington isn't an S tier. Kevin 2 seconds later: You know what states an S tier... Florida. Kevin I have never disagreed with you so much.

[@djrt8179]

Florida is absolutely S tier. Miami, Orlando, Jacksonville, Naples, Key West, Tampa, do I have to go on? Because it's a meme to hate on Florida you're hating, but Florida is amazing.

[@SquirrelOperative]

Florida - an S tier state if it wasn't for its residents

[@zenifftorrey8669]

@@SquirrelOperative I definitely don't disagree with that statement for me its honestly the weather. I'm just not trying to be sweaty 24/7.

[@PaulHeartthrob]

Florida is an s tier. Crazy fun

[@zenifftorrey8669]

@@djrt8179 It's a meme to hate on Florida for a reason, but also im not hating on Florida I just think its not worthy of S tier. Florida is an okay place to visit but that's about it.

[@PaPaSea]

i've never felt so attacked for being from new york

[@fascinatedjack]

Haven't watched yet, but I'm mentally preparing for the inevitable East Coast slander

[@MiniBagel]

As a Vermonter I had hope when Greg started talking and would be able to talk up Vermont but then my hope died when he gave up and was like fine D teir.

[@kindafunny]

Not being able to remember the city was a backbreaker. - Greg

[@ShaunBray]

I hope Kevin can one day experience the struggle of living in Hawaii, where there are no Best Buys and Apple Stores. No electricity and no internet. And only a grass shack to live in to keep you protected from the elements.

[@phightinphils13]

Philadelphia: tons of culture and history, great food , museums, sports. Pittsburgh: beautiful city, ranked one of the best business cities in America in banking/tech/medicine. Not saying PA is S tier, but I think it's a high B.

[@phaaaze9984]

Feel like PA is easily B or even A tier. Has everything you want or need except for coastline

[@phightinphils13]

@@phaaaze9984 And depending on where you're at, you can easily get to a number of Jersey shore points in less than two hours

[@EveryTimeIDavid]

B seems very fair for PA.

[@baundiesel]

As someone from the midwest/midatlantic states I fear for this topic haha...

[@DarthLemon616]

Greg completely dunking on NY makes my day. Because I'm from Jersey and they shit on us all the time 🤣

[@xvgabexv]

I’m 5 minutes into the states discussion and I already wanna throw my iPad across the room lmao

[@elJong]

As a New Yorker, I understand that CA and NY will always be 1-2 (interchangeably). I just want to point out to Greg who is complaining about trash on the street (NYC), SF has a task force just to ensure people are not pooping on the sidewalks!

[@kindafunny]

;) - Greg

[@mtg5e892]

There is nothing more dumb than seeing guys who have been to less than half the states attempt to rate all of the states. I would guess that 30 states were ranked by reputation alone. What is even the point? This isn't good content. It is the equivalent of ranking test drives of cars you've never driven, except this has the added benefit of insulting the homes of half the fans in addition to looking ignorant. This ain't it fam.

[@neddy42]

“It’s corrupt as shit”. Yeah, that’s Illinois for you. Lol

[@rogueowlproductions]

The fact that Arizona is so high is bonkers. Like we get it you only like hiking and turquoise.

[@benwilliams2780]

California has way more poop in public places than NY.

[@Adonis06785]

Surprised Nick didn't want to put jersey at A for the Sopranos alone

[@elimanator]

Utah is gorgeous and Chicago is amazing so Utah and Illinois deserve B tier. Other than that I fuck with this list lol.

[@ericmicke4130]

You mid westerners/west coasters completely missed the mark on the east coast particularly the north east. For shame on you all. For shame. As a Rhode Islander I can say it got its name when a Dutch explorer saw the shores as red clay and named it "red island" and then it was just translated over time to Rhode Island. It's got some really nice spots but it deserves a low Grade because you have to be a rich fuck to to live in those places (Newport, Jamestown, etc...). It deserves an F because it's legal name is "The State of Rhode Island and Providence Plantations" as if it's still the 1800s.

[@gamemasterbob9]

Thank you Greg for the New Jersey defense 🤘

[@ClarityGolden]

"Shoebox apartment on the 900th floor" 😭😭😭 Greg

[@Slowmojoeyo]

I will say: I’ve been to almost every state and have only been robbed once. In California.

[@mattrorabeck]

I can't wait for you guys to rank the Canadian Provinces (and Territories).

[@TylerSnowis]

they probably can't pronounce half of them

[@matthewwalsh1468]

Do it!! (But it'll probably be: Montreal [Greg, by way of Gen], Toronto & Vancouver...no provinces mentioned, they don't know & those are probably the only cities they've been to)...same reason I shouldn't rank the states as I've only been to Florida, so... 😝

[@dropkick79]

As I sat, tied to the chair I knew that they knew. The Idaho mask was pulled from my face revealing my true self. IOWA! "Yes!", I shouted, "And I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for your meddling with those Google docs!"

[@Browncoat0831]

As a Californian, I approve this podcast.

[@Al2One]

I’m only here because I know they’re going to forget Michigan 😆 -Y’all nailed Michigan. And Nick, I kno you were tryna be nice, but we definitely have had more downs than ups. Tim, you come to Detroit, we do have a lot of skeletons, but you’ll be good

[@frahmer86]

Ohio being above Michigan is just...wrong.

[@Al2One]

@@frahmer86 agreed.

[@wfe4210]

The Ohio part was the worst.

[@nicholasromalo502]

Not going to lie, Vermont being in the top 40 is an honor but i have a few tiny points why we should’ve been just a little higher in D: 1) Greg and Gen’s time there helped inspire Greg about what Superman story he’d write if he was given the chance 2) Land of Maple syrup 3) Senator Bernie F***ing Sanders (and to a lesser extent Senator Patrick Leahy who has cameo’d in a bunch of DC movies) Edit: Oh and every time a zombie apocalypse happens in a movie Vermont is the haven every survivor is trying to get to. I am Legend knows what’s up!

[@stanco4ever]

Whoah whoah whoah...whoah. I like Vermont but "land of maple syrup"? I know Americans like to forget about Canada but this statement I cannot let pass. How dare you sir.

[@nicholasromalo502]

@@stanco4ever To be fair, we’re the largest US provider. And we do border Quebec which is the largest. Think of us as the lemonade stand next to the factory down the road ;)

[@Orson_Welp]

I love California, but I feel like it's worth acknowledging that: -At any given moment, 1/3 of California is literally a burning hellscape -It takes an hour to drive 3 blocks -It produces the most pollution in the U.S. -It has been in a drought for 20 years -If all that appeals to you, you couldn't afford to live there without at least 2 roommates

[@bird2049]

I love California, luckily for me I love to drive.

[@kindafunny]

Sure, but, hiking. - Greg

[@Orson_Welp]

@@kindafunny My father got kicked in the head by a mule while on a hike

[@tjwaldie2880]

As someone from Texas, everything they said is absolutely true. We got a little good and a little bad here. On another note, there definitely is a Best Buy in Hawaii. I used to work for them and would ship stuff there all the time lol.

[@joex9970]

When Greg was in New Jersey, he called me on the phone because of a mutual connection we had at the wedding he was at. I remember him then saying how NJ was great. I was star struck and never got to tell him how I agreed with him that Batman V Superman is a cinematic masterpiece. Next time you’re here, gotta check out The Chicken or the Egg for the best wings in the state.

[@RogersBase]

Illinois below Missouri and New Jersey? lolwut Chicago is the single best city in the entire United States. Not even a debate.

[@Badalight]

Greg went to college in Missouri

[@durp312]

Hey Matt from New Jersey. Thanks Greg we appreciate that.

[@skillsthatkills4832]

As someone from Florida I am pleasantly surprised with these results.

[@CastleChris92]

As someone who's lived in various parts of New England for most of their life, and currently lives in Rhode Island, I find it very funny that Rhode Island is so low on this ranking when it's basically just DLC for Massachusetts

[@furrybproductions]

DO NOT DISRESPECT THE HOME OF LOBSTER ROLLS! Maine, A tier!

[@kindafunny]

~mysterious~

[@bigolpancake9136]

1:22:05 - The logic behind Mississippi's ranking pretty well encapsulates why I love KF.

[@sirhambino596]

As a mississippian Born and raised, you ranked us way to high. We are F tier at most. We only get the f because of the ability to say; M, I, Crooked letter, crooked letter, I, Crooked letter, Crooked letter, I, Humpback, humpback, I.

[@tonydub98]

As an Iowan, when I clicked on this my immediate thought was “wherever Iowa is gonna be is too high” Edit: almost forgetting it entirely is also completely fair

[@zakbrown791]

I know Greg is going to put Kansas as last...Rock Chalk Miller, Rock. Chalk.

[@kindafunny]

M-I-Z! - Greg

[@72chevelle24]

@@kindafunny Z-O-U!

[@agame5998]

What I will say in an effort to get Georgia higher, what about all the movies that are filmed here because of the diverse terrains and climates? A lot of Marvel movies were filmed here

[@MatthewNovak]

As a Michigander, I am horrified to watch this

[@travishobbs8533]

Huge top 20 finish for Utah. Honestly a really surprising finish for some big underdogs, never thought I would have seen this day. GO UTES!

[@billlaporta7004]

I was real nervous for NJ considering yall almost got stranded there for Wrestlemania. GG's Greg

[@Badalight]

Kansas City existed before Kansas. Kansas was named after the city, not the other way around. Also, the airport literally just got redone. And KC has the best BBQ.

[@cameronthaijohnson]

Greg is coping hard on Wisconsin like a classic Illinoisan. He knows all Illinois has is Chicago and Wisconsin destroys everything else in Illinois. You all try to put Wisconsin down and then any time you want to do outdoors stuff, see some nature, go to lakes, or go to waterparks at Wisconsin Dells you come here. All your suburban kids want to come to UW-Madison for college. We have the beer capital Milwaukee. We have sausage, cheese, frozen custard, and beer. We have lots of lakes like Minnesota. Madison is the only other major city located on an isthmus after Seattle and one of the best public universities, college towns, and running/biking/parks/outdoor/lake activities. Now Indiana on the other hand? Ouch. Nebraska? Try driving through there. At least Iowa has those green rolling hills and windmills to look at.

[@Teflecter]

Guys, you just haven't been to Queens, NY lol

[@belababus3776]

Or any other part of the state for that matter…

[@blank_face5182]

Im so glad y’all are who you are cuz im from florida and the fact that florida got S tier off the rip absolutely blew my mind like if this was any other podcast full of uneducated jabronies they would’ve put Florida in the D-F but clearly KF knows their stuff and wether they want it or not they are now honorary Floridians

[@jamiegagnon7986]

I'm from Maine. It's dope. If Tim visited Bangor and Portland, he'd have a great time. To be fair, though, the rest of the state does drag its position down a bit.

[@austinhuff9093]

LETS GO I'll take 15! Love ya Nick for defending ZONA!

[@jackcampbell7099]

I did not need this stress this early in the morning, I had to skip to the end just to see where my state (New Jersey) landed. Genuinely surprised and now I need to hear how it got there

[@ggregg2667]

Also from NJ, fairly surprised. It seems most perceptions are either very high or very low so the middle is nice. I would've given it A tier but B is acceptable. It is hard to properly explain why NJ is as great as it is.

[@Nivlacattack]

Aw yeah Tim with the Davis shoutout 🙌

[@pyrogoyle]

As an Iowan, that went about as I expected.

[@furrybproductions]

Also, being old like Nick, let me explain. Nick knows FloRida. He just doesn't know he knows FloRida. When you get old you know a song when you hear it, but have no idea who made it, nor do you care 😂

[@MaximLight269]

Does Nick know California has a Nevada City? 😂

[@andrewfrancis1479]

Potatoes or Corn. Story of life right there

[@xombie7928]

As someone who lives in the woods of East Tennessee and has only been to Nashville once. LETS GOO BABY, A TIER. that's the right move

[@carlitocafe8101]

Greg was spot on with the NY pizza

[@thefatmangaming932]

Reading the comments is like that scene from step brothers where the dad drives up and the two brothers are fighting and I'm sitting here laughing my ass off🤣🤣

[@edwinrivera6707]

At some point this has Chapelle show race draft vibes lol and I’m here for it.

[@stonebridgefilms2537]

Greg, as a beer lover, I expected more out of the Wisconsin placement! But you're from Illinois so I suppose that's expected.

[@stonebridgefilms2537]

The others didn't get to voice their opinion so we'll accept a retroactive B placement - no further comment at this time.

[@adamsheridan6487]

@@stonebridgefilms2537 Exactly! Plus we have the Waterpark Capital of the World, Summerfest, 13 time world champion Packers, the Bucks just won the title and have an MVP, Door County, a ton of breweries! The list goes on! Wisconsin is at least a B.

[@8bitdee]

If Greg doesn’t rank Illinois on top he needs to relinquish his Chicagoan card.

[@55meds]

I went into this expecting my state to get roasted but, lo and behold, HI made it to the S tier. As someone born and raised in Honolulu I gotta say, I don't agree lol. But I humbly except, great list guys 👍

[@Lewismarty1]

This is an OG topic right here! Only thing missing is CM.

[@adcast98]

Tim’s beard looks great

[@lilSchoen]

As someone from Nashville I was pumped finally hitting Tennessee.

[@logang631]

I never thought I’d see Nick and Tim be the ones lobbying for Illinois to be higher. Shame on you Greg

[@Arkhamlover14]

As someone who lives in Utah, y'all were too nice to this state 🤣

[@WaffleOnTheRun]

look greg Florida is 100% S tier it's literally the most popular vacation state in the US

[@SikGamer]

this episode is funny as hell lol

[@erodotosmiltiadous]

As an American/European, now I would like a European ranking next. The ignorance on European countries would be amazing for an episode!

[@ChloeCinema]

People forget how much great outdoor stuff there is in Colorado. I live in Western Colorado and there are so many great trails. There's the largest flat-top mountain on Earth. We get a decent amount of international tourism.

[@Robotlovesme]

Outback Steakhouse hack - order “blooming petals” 👌🏻

[@sonicboomkj]

Oh damn, when Nick said mysterious state and paused..........I was thinking Maine also.

[@gumgumleobazooka]

It’s about damn time someone brought up the pizza bullshit. It’s mostly glorified chucky cheese pizza AND it’s served like I get one free slice at school on a paper plate. Get over yourself. /s

[@jhallen2260]

As someone from Nebraska, I'm grateful for the C. Also I am elated that Iowa was forgotten and put in as an F

[@johnsantisteban7362]

I'm from NYC and I haven't seen the episode yet. But I feel like California about get some smoke there way and it ain't from a forest fine 🤷‍♂️😂🔥

[@icywinterof88]

As someone from Massachusetts I'm so happy with the conversation behind it.

[@paulmcg7]

I'm disappointed that anyone that got called out in the live chat didn't have their states instantly demoted to the bottom of the list haha

[@twild233]

I'm from Canada, and this has been very informative.

[@anvi9418]

as someone from Australia, i learned a lot and also nothing from this episode and i loved every second of it

[@frnkdatank25]

Tim: if it’s cold it’s a shitty state

[@xOogieBoogie3x]

New Jersey has the best pizza. It's not a debate. Our beaches are great. We have the largest wilderness south of Maine on the whole east coast. B Tier

[@BrklynRoses]

Almost an Hour of ads. omg. lol someone forgot the MAIN time stamp.

[@jasonc2341]

I remember when the Cali sky was red for a month and the other time when people had to get water out of their toilets.

[@AJPocan]

Currently living in WA, thanks for the love on that my guys! The only disappointment: Montana so low! 😅 It has arguably the two most beautiful and diverse national parks in the U.S with Glacier and Yellowstone (also it’s my home state.) 🤣

[@runner1375]

Y'all are crazy. I moved from CA to WA for a reason haha

[@AstreaGT]

I live in WA and I approve of this list lol. I would NEVER want to live in Seattle but it's fantastic to visit.