Weekend Update: Co-Worker Who's Extremely Busy Doing Seemingly Nothing on Returning to the Office

[@Linaselfcare]

"When you look annoyed all the time, people think that you're busy." -George Costanza

[@cokesquirrel]

That seriously does work.

[@mother_of_doxies]

True, I do this at least 38 hours a week.

[@lindaleelaw5277]

A prophet...who knew

[@mauriceortiz8817]

It's true. I did it often. Folks leave you alone.

[@j.martinonyc]

You mean -Larry David 😂

[@dsa5394]

I knew entire departments like this full of professional meeting goers. They were able to convey a sense of urgency, which is what higher ups looked for. It was funny and true.

[@robbennett5944]

Those are the people who are pushing for back to work 😂😂😂😂

[@ArchibaldClumpy]

IMO a schedule full of meetings is way worse than just having a lot of projects. I'd rather be swamped than have four meetings in a day.

[@joshhupp]

A manager of mine told me that a different manager expressed concern that I didn't panic or outwardly express distress when problems came up. Is that the proper way to respond to a customer's problem? Panic?

[@P__114]

Let me guess? Amazon?

[@joshhupp]

@@P__114 LoL no, it was a small company

[@LETSGOCUBS2008]

The oversized water bottle is so perfect

[@randymillhouse791]

Yeah, with the lines that say: "good start, keep going, almost there!!!!"

[@H-Vox]

I have an annoying ass basic b coworker who has one of those 😂

[@randymillhouse791]

@@H-Vox "Keep going." OUT THE DOOR!

[@lynnwilliams8295]

We have all worked with someone like this. I worked with a guy who would take hours a day making spreadsheets of stuff he needed to do so he never got his actual work done. He was perpetually behind and freaking out. He was literally making more work for himself then complained about the amount of work he had to do.

[@richy1988]

Busy fools, almost everyone

[@yve5659]

Literally every chief in the navy does this. I worked with a guy when I was in the military and we worked in the er. The male higher ranks thought he was amazing. He told me his secret was carrying a clip board and stethoscope and rushing around looking busy but he wasn’t doing anything. He then told me to fake it til I make it or some quote from Training Day.

[@lindaleelaw5277]

Before adhd diagnosis....

[@35mm21]

I went to college with a bunch of people like that who would spend more time "preparing" to make their work perfect then never finish the work. Particularly annoying in group projects.

[@timothyevo]

​@@lindaleelaw5277 OMG, I literally came here to say the same exact thing. I have ADHD and have to constantly fight the urge to plan to plan.

[@missq5200]

Heidi reminds me of Lucille Ball, the way she's able to convey something with her facial expression and physical comedy, and the lengths she's willing to go to make a scene work.

[@kathleenhannan]

Absolutely, I was thinking of Lucille Ball in between wiping away tears. 150% commitment to physical humor with her face, whole body, voice range and timing. The range of facial expressions Heidi made looking through all the papers! I've watched this maybe 20 times, and each time I laugh hysterically at something I hadn't really taken in the last time because I was laughing at something else. The writing is genius too, and the interplay between Colin and Heidi perfectly timed. And to top it all off, the character she's playing really reminds me of myself!

[@H-Vox]

True

[@dclucky2477]

​@kathleenhannan love your comment, agree with everything you said and I just so appreciate that you admitted it reminds you of yourself, I feel the same way, I can relate to this lol

[@kathleenhannan]

@@dclucky2477 Thanks Dustin. I love that you can relate to it too. I've been laughing at myself in a friendly way ever since I saw it.

[@standupmomedy]

I was gonna say, she would be great at playing Lucille Ball! Agreed!!

[@silverandexact]

Heidi Gardner is possibly the most underrated cast member. Always a solid performance.

[@Kevins773]

Everything about this was amazing. The energy, the commitment, the facial expressions.. just wow. I love Heidi.

[@SS-gx7tg]

Please make this a recurring character. This had my dying! That she carried this level of intensity on for 4 min is really impressive. I bet this will become one of the most talked about/referenced SNL characters in recent history. Heidi is amazing

[@rogerbrodniak5644]

Agreed...along with Lisa from Temecula

[@wm6549]

It was good, but would it basically be the same skit every time?

[@burgermind802]

W M her inevitable mental breakdown could be entertaining

[@SS-gx7tg]

@@wm6549 Did you not like Stefan after his first appearance? Stefan's update desk appearances got better w. time imo

[@casyatbat]

S S, really? I like this actress, but this is just too much to the point of being ultra annoying.

[@bradenkerr9062]

All of Heidi’s update characters are killer.

[@seffishestopal5950]

Angel is my favorite.

[@marctouss1862]

she's not really up to cecily.. but she's close...

[@P__114]

This wasn’t funny at all

[@tugboat2030]

She is really good

[@tunafishboi4236]

"In the weeds!" Got me rolling!😂

[@5mariomaster]

I can already see this being used in a future team meeting

[@leekittrell6037]

I rarely laugh out loud like this. “In the weeds” had me crying!

[@chrisvannorman4524]

she's a legend. this was the hardest I've laughed in years. give her a movie already

[@doughope761]

I mean, she's in Shrinking. And what an ending she brought to Season One.

[@Raven-ug8uw]

Not another genuine funny person on the show but her.

[@carlwilliams6977]

My condolences. It was a pretty lame skit overall! I.e., "salad phone"?! Perhaps you need your funny bone calibrated! 🙂

[@dogthegod3975]

@@Raven-ug8uwlol cuz this was not funny at all

[@Raven-ug8uw]

@@dogthegod3975 U just may be that co-worker then.

[@reprintranch]

I just about had a PTSD moment, expecting Crystal's boss to come onscreen and hand off several of Crystal's responsibilities to me.

[@RockinRita03]

😅😅😅

[@RockinRita03]

Thank goodness her boss is Che since she's his assistant

[@justrosy5]

Been there, done that. I see you!

[@lizp4657]

OMG, yes! Been there! 😒

[@BrentGodwin]

I worked with this woman. Drove me absolutely crazy that she acted like she was busier than everyone else in the company. But she had been there long enough that everyone just treated it like it was a normal thing, "Oh we can't give that project to Lori, she has SO MUCH on her plate!" But...does she?

[@heavnnnsent]

😂😅😂😅

[@seffishestopal5950]

When Heidi threw her phone after saying "doododdoddoo I'm screwed" I laughed too hard at that.

[@carpballet]

What part was so funny?

[@Lifemagic364]

Try laughing at a funnier part next time

[@cwg73160]

What’d you have for lunch? You obviously want to tell us every little thing that you do.

[@yodingdongyo]

If she picked up another phone and said, "I have to go; reschedule this with someone else" she would have nailed a spot-on impersonation of a government worker I once had to deal with.

[@randymillhouse791]

Hey, I'm writin' that down!

[@RockinRita03]

😮😅😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@Lifemagic364]

It wasn't her, it was you

[@shmookins]

I appreciate and notice when an actor doesn't stare at the cards most of the time. She did it so well you think she improvised the whole thing.

[@garrenshot]

She may have improvised this

[@bug5317]

OMG MORE OF HER!! That was hysterical!!! Guest characters on W.U. are so fun.

[@TheElusiveReality]

heidi really killed it with the physical comedy in this

[@beccafeeney7688]

Fake. She didn’t aggressively shake her salad

[@canaisyoung3601]

No time

[@justmaj]

I agree, huge missed opportunity.

[@reprintranch]

Salad was tasked with shaking itself and didn't do it. Crystal can't count on anyone else on her team.

[@thomthom6268]

You can't do that with a salad phone in there!

[@erinh9267]

Hey! Athletically shaking my salad brings me joy

[@marcusdub07]

Literally, this girl I used to work with, carried a clipboard around all day, we worked in a clothing store...

[@tanjab13]

Thank you for this visual! 😂

[@randymillhouse791]

Security clipboard replaced the blanket.

[@heavnnnsent]

😂😅😂😅

[@hutch1197]

Our "Crystal" was named Nancy, and she was perpetually insufferable. And don't ask me what the hell she did. She came to meetings held by every department and let us know how stressed she was. She even had some generic title that I can't remember.

[@ntdscherer]

Assistant Vice President of Operations

[@hutch1197]

@@ntdscherer Seriously. I think that was it.

[@jim6070]

This very dead on. I might add that the people that actually act this way have less to do than anyone else.

[@H-Vox]

My supervisor when I was a bank teller was like this. Every time a customer would say "how are you?" she would say "Busy! Running around like a headless chicken!" She was rarely busy

[@jessbrannon_actor]

I love how the hand just slides into frame with the salad 😂

[@GrotrianSeiler]

She’s really shining this season. This new character was so well played. Respect

[@GigiofEFlats]

“I’m Che’s assistant” punchline got me.

[@SoDakJason]

I love that we're carrying on Cecily doing spittakes/throwing wine on Colin by having Heidi throwing salad greens on Colin.

[@jeank5410]

This needs to be a recurring bit … I worked for someone like this a while back, lots of talking and meetings, she worked long hours including on weekends while I was never that busy - I’m not sure how much she was ever accomplishing.

[@StevenKombolis]

Colin adds so much sincere joy and easy going energy to the skits to make them work even better. You always hear about competition and sabatage on SNL so he must be such a great person to work with

[@wlb2j]

Heidi is fantastic! Great job!

[@susiesan]

Heidi reminded me of Carol Burnett in this

[@Kasino80]

Very much so!

[@rogerbrodniak5644]

Hard to believe it but Gardner actually outdoes all her Weekend Update characters with this performance!

[@billlawrence8520]

Heidi must use this as a recurring character. Almost, almost as great as Cicely’s Girl at a Party.

[@seffishestopal5950]

Cecily*

[@newclothes8165]

She needs a raise and a weekly spot on the show. Best bit ever.

[@laalaa99stl]

Good way to stick the landing with this sketch revealing who she "works" for. 😉

[@seffishestopal5950]

She's Che's assistant.

[@carpetfluff35]

This is most of my managers; always standing in groups talking about how busy they are while the rest of us are actually DOING stuff.

[@herauthenticself7749]

Heidi is such a star she never miss the skirt was hilarious I was dying 🤣.

[@toniwilliams1115]

The phone-as-husband bit and her wild EYES throughout were amazing.

[@m42666]

She really parodies a manager I once had. Even some of the jargon is the same. Amazing !!

[@skylarfoxy6908]

Nailed the facial expressions!

[@toonheaded1]

Oh yeah she's great lol

[@markallen3293]

I have worked in a office, sometimes we actually fake work.

[@randymillhouse791]

Women can do that easier than men. Get it?

[@dejah2553]

​@@randymillhouse791 No?

[@MichaelLudden]

This is all of my theater friends' impression of what 'work' is lol

[@TheSunnydeni]

We have been blessed with the genius of Heidi once again 🙏

[@NewMessage]

In his defense... her 'husband' can vibrate.

[@jessicaatkins3173]

"Where do u work?"... "in the weeds!" 😂😂😂

[@stephaniehall8179]

“and Bens’ bringing Oreo cheesecake, that aint gonna work, there goes my Easter Sunday”😂

[@jasonscott4366]

I had a co worker that was always busy but nothing ever got done. Funny how that works

[@markalexander3659]

Me, when my supervisor comes into the room

[@DrQuizzler]

I worked at a company where a guy on another team was the low-key opposite version of "Crystal". He didn't seem stressed or overwrought, and he showed up at the all-hands meetings, parties and celebrations. I'd see him walk through the office on occasion sporting the same busy-distracted look I'm sure we all had, like "I gotta remember to do that thing...". He was cordial and jovial in the breakroom or the cubical aisle, always for just long enough, then he'd disappear, presumably back to his desk. In a way he was kind of like Frank Abagnale, hiding in plain sight. Two years into his tenure there, a cursory audit by a newly appointed manager on his team revealed that he had not checked in a single scrap of work the entire time.

[@FTNChicken]

This whole sketch was definitely just an excuse to throw food at Colin

[@dgeneric7518]

I'm her the last 30 minutes or so of the day. I find walking quickly and constantly checking things makes it seem I'm still working 😂😂

[@VianneyCreates]

I felt that Ann Taylor Loft joke. When I used to work in an office at a university, I was the #3 Ann Taylor Loft shopper in the Fresno, CA area. LOL!! The reason I know that is because my friend was a district manager at the time, and I guess she would run reports...and my name would pop up. She was like "We need to get you to #1." LOL!! I was also a busy lady. (;

[@roachdoggjr722]

How often were you checking your salad phone?

[@ZigbertD]

At my job I spend a lot of time walking very quickly from place to place with an expression like I'm in the middle of one task but also intently concentrating on what I have to do next...

[@LilyGazou]

This is how I used to get exercise into my day. Zoom through the hallways, take stairs up and down going nowhere.

[@DerekLovell]

Seriously EPIC!! Laughed out loud so many times, Heidi is God ❤

[@michaelyuscavage5179]

I've washed dishes, delivered pizza, worked in retail, been employed in a factory, and taught high school. This is just about every employed person in America.

[@Vincent-fo7xp]

And most of our jobs suck but we need money

[@zesty9815]

... all at once?! Now I get it.

[@trainluvr]

I used to bring a mug of cold water into meetings, and eat from those salad bowls at desk. That ended 7 years ago THANK ALLAH.

[@randymillhouse791]

I saw your comment and want to speak directly to it but don't have the time at the moment. Let me know your availability for ETERNITY and I'll send a calendar invitation.

[@randymillhouse791]

@@trainluvr What kind of food does ALLAH serve?

[@loisann7619]

🤣 Oh my gosh, soo true! She nailed this! People I work with ACT so busy, you’d think they were top level Engineers for NASA. 🤣

[@icantollie]

I love that example. Once interned with engineers at NASA, and in person they were so chill, so laid-back, and never patronizing or condescending, but when they got back to whatever they were doing where no one was watching they'd focus like a laser and get so much sh!t done, the diametric opposite of this sketch

[@FireflyABQ]

That salad phone though :D

[@richcastro8990]

She hits it out of the park EVERY TIME!!

[@BmaGrl]

I work in a whole office of these people. They never have any time to get you the data that you need, but expect that when they ask you for ANYTHING that you will get it for them yesterday. Yet, there is NO WAY that they are more busy than our boss, & he is completely professional, with realistic expectations & timely responses.

[@lyrachle]

This skit was actually uncanny for me. How did Jeidi know my co-worker so well?

[@tazp2773]

Heidi is so good

[@blueprairiedog]

When starting a new job, my spouse was told, "Always carry a piece of paper and look serious.". This was before everyone had a laptop.

[@lauralunamartin7331]

She's hilarious! An under appreciated talent. The eyes! I've never been the first comment before, whoo-hoo!

[@innercalm9338]

One of the best Weekend Update guests in a Lonnng time! More of this!

[@damiankubaa]

that is a phenomenal performance

[@mikeberry2332]

'So what do you do for work?' 'Um, this.' Her delivery of that line is hilarious!

[@acc2017]

Where do you work “In the weeds” 😂😂😭

[@badbiker666]

OMG - the salad phone! LOL that really broke me up.

[@fanciestofcats7111]

Heidi is fantastic and has been my favorite cast member for years

[@InvaderHog]

this is somoene I know at work- she is so disorganized and never seemed to actually be doing anything but she had like two phones, a laptop, tons of papers and I was teh one who had to do my own work and hers like bruh what are we doing here???

[@victorc777]

I’ve worked 12 hour days, with classes in the evening, and having to find time for everything else in between, and managing without stress. Then to hear, from some people near and dear to me, with no job or any other obligation outside their house and with no kids, complain about how they are “so busy” and “stressed out”. Like with what!?

[@BluJae93]

Her eye makeup is flawless,love this look on her lol

[@tylerhackner9731]

Love heidis update characters

[@pmaynard10]

All my managers act like this and no one can figure out what they actually do.

[@j0hnj0nes1980]

Heidi is now the best in show. Seems she’s found and perfected her swagger. I relatedly laughed vociferously at this Update character!

[@RockinRita03]

The salad phone... 😂😂😂😂 Throwing it with Dallas landing in Colin's hair😅😅😅

[@geegeezlouis86]

Now that Cecily is gone Heidi is keeping up the tradition of throwing things on Colin and I think that's beautiful

[@kennetho2499]

Her physical comedy is great

[@Mandrake591]

She’s awesome, we know people like this!

[@sammyp9514]

This is so true. So many people just love to complain, and they answer emails all day

[@escape7557]

So what kind of jobs are these that people can just answer emails all day? What is the title of such a job ? Where can I find one? Seriously.

[@billyllewis]

This is hysterical! 😂

[@rikihunter4224]

The water bottle though ..... Also anyone else notice she flipped us all off when she was explaining her spreadsheet? 😁🤣

[@youareblessedyouareloved9278]

A+. This is one of the funniest skits I've ever seen.

[@lizannewhitlow1085]

She actually did googly eyes! 😂

[@jamescrossland2599]

Unfortunately, I've had (as many have) the displeasure of working with fellow healthcare i.e. drs, nurses etc. that do this and it can n has become a HUGE problem for patients receiving care! Totally 💯 know this character 😐

[@theronwright1276]

"Hey man, Crystal is the best"

[@jamesmapson1582]

She nailed it even down to the birthday sign-up sheet!!! Not making this up, but this lady has worked with me for several years always pretending to be busy, but in reality, she ain't doing SHIT!!!! PSA: The person in YOUR office who always has the most to say in the meetings and on the zoom calls, sending out the most emails, and always tries to make themselves look important (especially in front of management) is the one who isn't doing a DAMN THING!!! (lol)

[@mplot0]

Drew doesn’t do a damn thing. Not a damn thing.

[@johnbellocchio66]

I have supervised people like this who spread anxiety and paranoia like the plague, and I fired them as soon as possible because they destroy productivity and make everyone else crazy. In most cases, if they shut up and did their job, they wouldn't actually have that much to do.

[@THISOLDOUTBOARD1]

Wow. Great character for Heidi Gardner. She's so talented! Great job Heidi! Hope to see more!

[@jasonthurgood6699]

Print off a test page, walk fast through the office, constantly checking the paper, look annoyed that you can’t find what it is you’re looking for. -How to cut from your office to the car without someone hitting you up for a “real quick IT issue”.

[@MeghanBean]

Hahh love this character

[@zachbissett194]

When she answers the salad phone and says “I’m screwed”…it kills me. Excellent delivery.

[@AustinMichaelDearing]

Felt like Heidi was channeling classic SNL quirks with Molly hosting, not just the physical stuff but the faces and mannerisms too. Fantastic bit

[@rolltidewoah]

she shined in this skit lol her facial acting was so good!

[@ElSantoLuchador]

My experience is different. I have more or less a predictable workload. I come in late, work three hours, and then leave. The manager was on board. Everyone else was resentful that they couldn't work only 3 hours a day. The problem they had is that it took them 2 days to do what I did in 3 hours. They looked busy, but mostly it was socializing. I'm not a fan of workplaces. I don't mind cubicles and fluorescent lights, but the people that work there...JFC.

[@DreamingCatStudio]

Colin is such a good straight man.

[@king_tyi_the_flyy9067]

“Where do you work?” “In the weeds!” 😂😂😂😂😂

[@mintee119]

I need more of Heidi throwing food at Colin

[@nickycat11]

the hourly water jug and sweetgreen salad are TOO accurate

[@trashmammal5757]

Ok THIS Character needs her own Sketch 😂

[@JordanDoww]

she is so good

[@lyraserpentine894]

OMG, this is me. I'm an administrative asst. and with all the ad hoc crap I get dumped on me daily, it's hard to get my actual work done. Like, how do people not know how to make copies themselves?